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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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- u& L+ @1 ]3 ~% ~& y5 F* x1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
; A4 W7 [# h9 ]6 [; P" ]9 \6 x! b4 _2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
$ t D/ Y8 P, z& ^3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. # \$ M; a, @5 P7 F) ?* \, Z8 T
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. , ^( f( p4 K2 G6 h
5. Weed
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA ; f$ K* A. {. t& M" I Y8 g: S h
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. $ d" g3 l" `/ s6 ^. f" a# h0 s
2. Ottawa who?
. s* y* |8 w" _ T1 }, N3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. % c3 X" Q( r: M" T
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. 1 x' I' I5 _+ Q! \; U
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. ! W% B/ D- G8 E6 d) I
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. 5 T9 E- Z1 ]( H7 n
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN ! U* O/ p# h9 i2 k7 Z8 G
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1. You never run out of wheat. ; O, _% F, t2 O$ B7 M
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
6 J9 S, L- ?' t* G$ |! d3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
1 E: I! Z |$ v0 }/ R- a' p4. People will assume you live on a farm. 9 \4 N5 A% l# K. Q0 f, L5 J
) Z& C4 w0 Q* STOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. - W% U4 y$ O( K
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. ) n6 W$ P8 e T2 \/ N _8 ~
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. & ~. ^0 W- E5 [' F
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
4 q$ e7 }" a* j L5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. 6 k: p. g/ q, \; x: m
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" o- e- B4 c/ W$ v. dTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe. 9 q0 j7 Z, g6 d
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
s$ H5 e& a# x; G; |/ O( D3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
$ E% D7 b% t, ~1 q4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. + ?( E' B5 |2 w$ S! ]
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2 |1 V6 a- u3 _! NTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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0 j5 g W6 C. t1. Racism is socially acceptable
9 ?& O5 f! s. \0 p% z3 n0 N: z; {2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
E& P7 s. U7 z; l' B) n3 d' g3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
, Q+ M( F4 q4 Q% C- e4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
: y$ L! t1 C$ [1 h3 N" oTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 3 J$ W2 ~) A0 Y2 A4 Q6 D
, Z/ A3 v$ q0 i8 g$ P; JTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK ( ]' q$ _ ?% h4 t
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
- n% Y- v6 L6 ^4 ~; f3 \" L% u2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. " Q) H S+ S; l! P5 e
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick & Y# g+ N. r1 e" t, m
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. - o: \% d: | r- ]4 g/ F5 N1 `6 [; p
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA , O4 i' S4 \" ]
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1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
5 A. z6 e2 P# ~2 c# N6 D2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. 3 w* {1 m# b7 n1 \# B
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. ( M9 I, j5 K5 _. ~( b
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' C4 F0 @ x+ W- K+ w& sTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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0 ]7 n0 ?+ R) @, N5 J$ ]" r1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
. `2 g2 e6 j* Z- O2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. # [4 ?$ n8 U. g$ ^" Q
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. 9 s* l; z9 t- ?+ c4 l/ B
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
+ L) ]3 \3 X3 N8 f5 u5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. 9 Y5 e7 k6 Y# b: G& i8 U
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. 2 y5 ^- M: |: q7 E2 t
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" [# N: w# x3 G. v+ g2 h, iTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND * @2 G, @- O9 T$ K9 }5 X
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
! m. h& E8 ?7 K$ I2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
, \' s2 h! x" S) ^6 }) g3. The workday is about two hours long. + P1 B" j0 h7 I8 j) d- L
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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