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送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

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发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA6 H9 B# o4 G! N6 ?  V$ B# H4 O
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1. Bring your own house.
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2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and
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, T) B2 c5 j1 W 3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder
: J) X/ W' D( Icapital of Canada .
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4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .
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' k4 J+ `3 E  S8 h 5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug
( L, @8 u. Z# F( n7 M, d5 ccapital of Canada .& {* [4 K/ H/ _, b, i( h& D- j
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6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is/ c' A6 \5 K& F0 ]! j7 `" @: y
$8.00/hour.! v! F6 j6 f4 w$ Z! d+ M" ^+ R
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7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.
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8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money7 F' N" f+ O! U. r7 `+ v* j6 f
on a 15 year holiday ?  y  p. a  }! Z1 h; o* H

4 d/ Z/ S1 t. i3 x2 N% } 9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas' k. o: n* m" A- {* L" y
prices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)  e. V* T* j: o5 _( U# x
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10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come
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11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12
: S$ j) R8 V, G/ E5 xyears ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.
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8 I8 F9 l/ y8 ~2 k) ]# }7 a" u THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".
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, h7 T! Q' Q( P+ Y/ }- k( L2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour0 B/ R- k  B  K# w2 [# X' s/ m
is from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.+ ^; |5 r8 w+ |4 f5 r
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3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its+ k) |6 J3 d' b$ T
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
" ~1 D' a" w4 x. o  D5 L% zmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
! [% j: y5 ?, ^* B" Ogo second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell) V' r. t! v7 a9 S- n
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.3 r- X' V  T6 |

* f+ q" D- p# K) n* W& P4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
5 I2 n/ ], S4 d- p1 R& V: Zcussed out, and possibly shot.
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5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that
2 Y7 ~( [. l5 W% S8 Ncan get you shot.
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6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour9 t5 q- N. b0 h0 T- D
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next' k( X) J+ g2 Y9 T7 O" Z
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
: ?- J! s  I8 e6 U! ~& wmore construction starts everyday.
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  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
) i+ \% \/ T$ c: E. vdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,* t3 ~2 R; v8 H5 b% r
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.* q! A% i$ K5 ~

1 v- Q) D6 J( n* _8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all
$ \6 F. j. w3 Vthe same road.
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9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
2 d! _7 ~  R' B+ }shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally, p7 b" v' P. K  K
activated."
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10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
4 F  a/ \7 ?# h  uzone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off"
4 t' U: R7 S7 b; E- O& e  O4 naccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.3 i$ S- m7 o- i8 K" q8 G3 d
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11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
* ~! k8 u4 V( P: y/ zlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and" d. i: D' A" ~  U% F+ \8 N
blankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is& y% a& M  c$ X9 i6 ]8 a
virtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层
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有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。# d, F) A( s% c# C
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
& R5 H' v" L1 W6 ^有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 :
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此地钱多, 人傻, 速来 8 X  ~8 v- m5 L" K9 d! O

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+ h4 k( e+ c- t5 s[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 & O6 }, ]+ s4 ]
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。( G" v, U" V0 `/ h7 c( z
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
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说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表
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说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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这么刺痛你了吗?0 L9 e7 s; [; a+ \% [, f

' ^" o: ]5 ^  o( b1 R我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
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发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 " L: B8 Q0 l) ^8 u" T% ]& p9 a5 B8 `! U
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
% d6 |0 c3 j! E, ~& t满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。$ b6 R! S1 e# T, X; W; U/ E  q
...
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你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。% p. U, `: ~9 }7 n- X/ x

9 q& G$ J' s7 F% C+ B# C$ _2 ]/ T再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
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发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
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发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks.9 Q4 u! X, o1 [" \5 h
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发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
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发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
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