 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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p( u0 S* H# C+ q& mWhy did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
B! ]& y* }$ c2. Mostly to clean the house. 5 ?& y( f' E0 q1 j9 @. u- H
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 1 t8 k' S; I) ^; n
9 D1 X4 k v3 O+ [8 N+ SHow did God make mothers?
% a! m+ {5 q) b# Y; T7 K1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.* z1 Q0 a+ l; ? z/ D
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 9 \, Q2 d) O- u2 x) t' o$ u
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? : [ [+ p8 [' q
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
% L' C7 [9 o! G" N, `9 k; T m2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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7 [# ?5 c, R8 L* SWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 0 n% W* R$ W2 p1 }7 t, h' E5 ?
1. We're related.
; b3 b* V5 H' Y9 i2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. - ~5 B; m) H6 d0 e' X! \
' N$ a" M% s+ f/ m& [" AWhat kind of little girl was your mom? 3 ~% z v* ?9 Z& h- j& \
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
) l; a" W: }0 } N+ e- _3 i z2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 0 s' C2 `. }( n* |. b
3. They say she used to be nice. + G" _- f5 S$ m3 ^& {1 C
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? ( R) }. Q( e8 m6 s+ v( g! m+ i+ K
1. His last name.
U0 V D) X c2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?2 c+ x- C6 a8 m
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? / G8 r, G2 X# i" i1 j* N) Q
# B8 M% [; ^8 _Why did your mom marry your dad? 3 j: U7 x# @0 m* C6 i0 g
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
. @: N |/ a' x# F; D4 w2. She got too old to do anything else with him. , U4 V) C8 K) a9 g3 i* W
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? ( f+ t7 J) c- y1 r3 {3 o, d. e4 w" J
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. . k1 _4 u$ f+ W) U( Y* }# _0 ]
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
* l7 s D+ D& k* h$ z' U1 e3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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; J- X* `* u" Y% u' V0 v) o$ rWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
: x) F- v0 h& l' C/ g; X1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
3 T- W2 d7 H R+ Q- a2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
% K: J9 E! I7 k! I$ i! [3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. % i& c* G+ l2 w: R5 [
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. % o* \& z# f" X7 u! }
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What does your mom do in her spare time? % g- u5 k) |* i" ~
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
6 s) W8 |; B; s Q2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? " J h4 _5 c5 H$ [
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
4 y! E7 r' g& M9 A3 K, c4 k7 Z' b9 c2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? # Z) X" ~1 N/ ] p( P
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. ! ?2 d8 u2 [# w8 u- z1 d
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
0 @ ?0 u# x6 P6 P1 j3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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