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Why did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.; Q( l* p# r' |8 k! N3 Y
2. Mostly to clean the house.
. S8 l7 C5 }6 ?( k+ I7 u3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. ( s9 g$ s$ e; w3 F" [, C1 t0 O
, l0 T* z- R5 B) i4 ]4 V9 ?How did God make mothers?
" R0 z8 j# g0 O/ p1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.( p, a; ?0 K+ R( O
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
8 N# H5 ?( P) }8 n. R" ?& q3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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$ L8 b2 u! F* O: ]- g4 eWhat ingredients are mothers made of ?
1 J, \6 O+ ~; C @; ?1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
- g3 ]# s o1 V: [+ Y+ F2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. 9 m) h; r+ Z% {& @: I3 l$ s
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? ; Q9 D5 [' m4 T
1. We're related.: Q* f4 O: @4 K( ]
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 3 {- ^3 d0 `, \0 F5 s2 p2 F
9 j6 T; D6 O0 K/ T0 hWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
% y7 P" v k1 b# p/ R* y1 y1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
' s) ~4 ~! ~& F2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
8 w+ u. g2 t1 f# f$ j! m3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
( O! r; E/ ]; p" t$ D B: c1. His last name." d+ @' h' |3 y: e& I
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?, [' @7 r# @5 R* U: F$ b$ p6 ]
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad? , n& ^/ V6 }' k" I, d, u
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
/ v" d1 H" y0 y/ N, t4 M2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
% s _7 n8 u% t: h) }3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. - R) f3 W% u/ k8 I" r
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Who's the boss at your house? 2 V' G. o* _! S$ |
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. @; y( ~( T' `: d3 D
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
5 b! a2 ?. j0 r+ Q8 z3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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0 G) E Z% ^ v2 K: o$ e7 mWhat's the difference between moms & dads? / B- X- E% e# t
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. + M6 F3 ]; s( n: j/ j4 R+ X
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
" \9 d, l4 J$ a B; D! }3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 5 l4 x5 A! q! h6 X7 \3 U
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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5 }4 K8 C7 A1 g& o$ ZWhat does your mom do in her spare time? # {! }+ n, w! P O ` ?* g) F
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
1 a% p% ?' Q( h/ k0 E2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
5 f" V! C9 R& ]( t% L* p1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
: V& s+ S$ O2 U- K6 `; m2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 9 F9 F& r, }- ~# V" W6 a- Q9 R
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
6 C9 _+ [# X+ {3 l7 Q1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 6 y; |8 P$ o: W
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
7 g2 k" q, U( E" y+ p& b3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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