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: n+ Z/ B8 v9 F7 SWhy did God make mothers?
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/ b m) G4 C* p( N3 B. s1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
6 t. c* \- W6 e( Q* `7 K* C2. Mostly to clean the house.
) G2 {: k) J+ b' d$ A3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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& P+ C6 K# W) k- G/ g' C" vHow did God make mothers?
1 T$ K1 _, k! p1 T+ L0 |/ ?1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
" e& R' { d% J5 e5 A# q2 G2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. / a3 r4 U m. {* ^
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
" j/ Y) t( Z* A1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
' c2 J% ]3 N6 |5 k* J+ Z( I2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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% n. k" U) [) T' U( b2 M1 VWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 4 X# b: K* a( a- k
1. We're related.
& _4 i' T4 g, |( n0 a# b2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. B' z) l3 m8 k! J8 s; X% z# }+ V& U; m
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
! e) ?+ _: m0 k# P* M1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2 F7 p; y& O+ K2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
+ K$ R8 U) c& {/ H+ u' M- V! g8 d* R3 `3. They say she used to be nice. 2 @& n: G1 E' m& f( X9 b
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? + {0 j: V# M2 h; J' T
1. His last name.% d: C* ^# n. [1 n. @0 I
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
e a1 q1 S7 ?: H% N3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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! L/ z3 n3 @; ]+ F2 N: E+ o+ O# }Why did your mom marry your dad? . ~5 Y4 Y. p3 c9 h( y% z
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
& e* j( M3 e! u5 _9 S2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 9 [$ m, x3 z0 Q
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. % x0 W5 l' n) W& g# N4 K( C' e
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Who's the boss at your house? & V" }7 K" c7 _- ]- P
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. - v. |4 U6 S$ s- ?, m$ ?5 K
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
( A. [) G9 f7 W* j3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads? ! U* X8 K0 D* p$ F; z3 R
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. r! }6 U" \+ p" C, i
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.* n& @: r" T2 x" U% u7 U3 s
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. $ m, e, P$ [) I
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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, s: _: \: b( z: z* g) KWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
2 }" d0 H. Z9 _; h0 A6 Q$ O1. Mothers don't do spare time.8 Q8 U6 {# a% Q, |. W
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. + [, Y4 W! K) N3 w
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? # T, F, V5 ]+ f$ P" D% b$ k# p5 V
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.. A( \: Q y6 ], R$ n1 g; }2 [
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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! s5 G0 M8 j1 K0 J5 ~If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
: {5 S- Q2 u; v) A& `" K3 m$ ~! q1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 9 g5 L; U* D, h1 ~* x
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.& z2 N' R* B3 S2 ]8 y8 Q
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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