鲜花( 1394) 鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?
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( S- i! k! D( |6 w2 c% z1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
, z9 O7 k; H+ V; v2. Mostly to clean the house. 7 B: P5 W& I% [& \5 t
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 6 c j4 c: z6 S; o, w! j1 {0 _
+ M. J& h5 b8 t4 t3 h1 O8 f! {# aHow did God make mothers?
X; @7 g* t) N6 x! O! x! M7 r1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.5 u, P- z6 x9 q* i0 g3 {3 Q
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. / d& x1 ]1 u9 p/ j u4 ^& O: l
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. * ~% j7 E3 G. ]1 Z& i, d
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
" y# N W9 `2 H9 l; [) D1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. - k- c3 o7 B# @4 U( x) u- V2 C0 f* H5 w
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
. @: ^, y' M9 L0 f! a0 K1. We're related.
5 I) T& J$ I$ Z0 ?, }# |2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. # t0 R6 w; }: {: t. L) u
n9 Z: t: k# I0 e( M4 ]What kind of little girl was your mom?
g2 L9 y1 K# `6 N1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. : F; ` y# w; H$ G
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 2 j- [. R& d/ P
3. They say she used to be nice. # Y5 A+ B$ D/ D
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
, a9 S+ |6 b) U ~% H4 R0 _. \1. His last name.
0 _- P* P% _! m1 S( E2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?' C- D9 Z9 Q4 i6 G) S# m
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? " d: O1 ^" Q9 B0 s+ T
! `) e! K- Y4 @6 G& qWhy did your mom marry your dad?
$ D" m' g- I! j9 g8 ~5 i" ]% g& ^1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
/ Z/ f- ~) U8 i2 Y2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
: d- r2 r. h( s8 d$ Q7 l3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 2 |' s4 B( r) j1 O& v
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Who's the boss at your house?
+ B5 v* k5 R" p/ E* S( f C( |+ [1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. " E' }2 M5 f8 S. C
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
% Y$ i/ l4 H; r9 ?% o8 w) ]" Q3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. & l" N& E- n! d1 j% ?+ E) p
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
$ m6 w* u# g5 \7 W% W! g( E# _5 I1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. + l: e5 E2 i. ^" ]' J' ?# O7 |, v- m
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
- |/ i- s) b8 B0 d* _- a9 E3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4 j; e2 o! D+ I9 ]0 b, o4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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4 G$ E. e* F" k5 MWhat does your mom do in her spare time? 7 }5 R, H/ Z! _% s- k G1 p
1. Mothers don't do spare time.+ f, _0 _, I, f+ y8 q" J, y( r r1 n
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. . t2 |; T5 s! n
, w5 i& s% y1 S5 W1 W: s( N4 yWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? 3 L7 b% s1 @* \# k+ q4 \
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.! q/ M2 B9 K& x b
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 5 j8 b1 {2 D5 |5 y9 ^* C" M( F
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 4 V% \5 N: R7 X; ?4 E3 y
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
+ }& \6 [6 `7 R! J* N3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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