 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 1 V% @* W) ^2 Y- c
8 c8 Y- J1 E7 F& L: i2 U- g) I
- [6 b4 ?9 B2 p5 i5 y( @--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
0 z' L9 [7 g% r$ i+ ~$ s) W
# z; k8 [. I$ K {1 R# N% T2 z9 j# d
0 p! }5 R# B# G' E$ QTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.8 Y g5 Z C' T' e1 v
8 C; |5 W5 a _
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
. f3 c2 P* ?* i# P6 T; O* b! O2 S7 o! X3 o' T
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
1 }9 r( g2 X& R! O& \+ W
8 t$ K- N' ~) k* i1 ~" ULook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
! c; }# `8 N5 j6 F- C$ Jmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc., J6 H; Y! g9 f/ k' o
8 q4 l$ F3 r) H& g
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. + z r2 o! V) D$ z' t; w
% k4 M. l+ q' \/ f( ZWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 0 j7 ~& y H. C4 l
9 G1 c9 h8 x+ eWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
5 ?& _! s+ Q9 G0 V( B/ H% W# j6 V4 e, s2 a) K7 l1 u# R5 [
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..( s0 k4 Q; z- X2 @" q: T4 l
$ B1 o5 N6 l! A. zWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. ' e4 l3 I6 G! G8 ^0 f
) o3 {: U6 e5 u
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. . }$ ~3 n9 w. q+ x- j
" |4 t! ~9 ~$ N' QRinse conditioner off hair.. d5 G5 v2 y% |
( W/ @5 X3 f2 T3 ^1 cShave armpits and legs.
6 r9 }6 F: I* V+ s, e% Q5 `6 Z* e a) ^: p- O% S& O
Turn off shower. g, z. F9 H1 s
2 R& \0 R- Z) t' J M! t/ K$ A8 ?0 ySqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
9 ?" U' h, M3 n' F' y i% p; n( q" s! k7 h) Q8 P/ a- |
Spray mold spots with Tilex. . d x. E/ u# M+ L8 H, Y
! U+ w8 V( Z, t& U! P1 @* ]7 eGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 0 C& O' ~* W$ @) U8 `
. u3 q' o: g( z* x# z8 k- X
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. : y' X% y9 R9 G7 x4 [
0 j4 D' m' M4 Z1 L3 z1 `, L: lReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. ) ~6 I u- n! Y) `' k- q
) |( L% ]1 A C8 f/ K6 e' U5 P
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
/ p$ m9 Z& A. k6 c3 L7 a; K) W) Q
- z6 R$ L. K, C* t8 g) A2 c1 u
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: # y4 N) C# S6 v i
% \2 a/ @# {, p8 _7 WTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 5 A! d# d* `# m/ m6 l, Q
! [& y' u9 ^7 i* U0 L. VWalk naked to the bathroom.
& k2 j& p: b4 F, i/ ]
) J+ F3 a- F1 v; F9 S# N: J, V2 qIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. , U G- z/ x! G( S! v; ]
+ i2 L$ j% p$ W5 j0 q" @6 r- Z0 Z
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
* T: K6 d1 z o2 P3 J) t: D# }( x+ }1 G7 C$ T
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
- F8 Z; x& L# N5 E* e7 L8 A0 N/ b: I* R: T. j; Q, S5 a% \
Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. " a% F- G X" H* Y6 ~
) j1 `6 G4 W) i& ^
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
' z5 W! V% Q8 U9 c$ w/ G
' \0 Z R" M% d# Z. QFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. ; H9 G. ~* z1 P9 S6 ~
7 L0 S6 Y6 C( YSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 7 [: H/ P _8 w! b; x& p
M0 n0 ?4 p9 Z2 a; |) t& m
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 7 Q6 r+ ^8 r7 V: K9 {
( a) \6 C! x8 M8 z I
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. + U K! R6 B/ w$ |% i9 B
. u% p* s) ]- s4 g: a5 d! C: T) _; v
Pee. - T$ m; Q4 v3 t5 I
+ A& W) q, u" f) TRinse off and get out of shower. . O1 t& |( \; T! W' D% S) n
! ?$ P5 V1 f2 `& y7 w( mPartially dry off.
5 V. t1 q d) u' b5 i1 `4 S6 d8 H( D+ F w
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 2 t2 M/ J; j$ j3 P4 @5 W
5 p: c! r8 i* ^. [& ?Admire wiener size in mirror again.
, p. \, x. r/ n; G! v+ y0 d3 Y( T' ?5 C8 }' o. e+ X. R( A$ p4 E7 P
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
b: X1 B m- z7 Z$ h2 }" I/ T: j; Q; D4 [+ C+ G6 ^
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
f" v$ f$ C& F
' U4 F. k; C' gThrow wet towel on bed.
( \ L5 u4 b7 H" x% i
) E8 x- ]5 s9 lIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
