Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:

5 q( \) S( H* F# ^2 O1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
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% g( N" W* m+ l2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
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) u! C9 \  n* f9 q' _+ l& b) H4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
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5. Are You Andy or Barney?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
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7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
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2 m) @1 Y' p7 z: [# M8. I pay your salary!

9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

, R" ]' ?8 [/ t0 F7 V11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
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% K6 I7 ?* x! M0 K1 z; I12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"