 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident: N) r( c; J9 s. v
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.- r: R, \3 A$ P7 |% N# p% \1 U
$ W: j* P: G! W9 I% c0 n; w: fThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.$ L* I0 b* R6 K4 N9 R
4 i5 G" }7 p8 r2 [# j2 U1 i
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
]: `9 o v% d
! u, \1 o4 S1 j( PFurious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
; p3 j( `9 x1 @# E; E& b- L+ K
0 w, T" \) x- X- `1 _The blonde started laughing.
5 _! b% ^" i `1 g! O6 Z5 g$ I7 A& v0 v8 }) X4 P3 |
This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
0 z9 |/ v% _! [) r) b# W* A
; M3 N, w/ r U: @This time the blonde laughed even harder.
8 a/ L7 u4 ~# q) k; C' W, Q
( U1 l" w8 }% e& w7 y$ HLivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
3 s& f6 x. n9 S0 B# m: S3 X/ W B2 S. I. c
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.% ]- P' E3 p3 q, K
" N* j) b/ \) ?1 V- O0 s9 KThe blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"0 d4 V9 b8 }( u2 B* P7 d
, g0 ]# e9 G9 B( H
Rowing Your Boat4 q+ K; _- x+ s a2 ^
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
/ s2 u5 q5 E; I: H9 [# l
: o' g5 b+ [4 o$ F: H: kThe driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"$ B" h5 P, p. r4 F0 m* U
b, X+ I) \3 }
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her.". ^2 K2 M. Z1 `% f
! g' h( Z2 c3 R$ T. q
I Want to Buy That
* I3 C4 h3 l, b7 v" H% P& bA blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.1 W7 R& o1 e9 N
8 F1 |, `7 h+ y& }" u" H7 F
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
8 [, W$ M( p x2 v& W9 g+ Z2 ]4 s6 H- E; D. l4 |- ~
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
: L+ H" \* c% {; x0 C5 K8 w5 A: V! {+ S: F
Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.7 T& t% d: b) X* a
4 e% V* z7 t n) Y) qSure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.5 q7 {* ~) P' S0 O
) ^6 T3 S; b Y W: K$ |) `To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. j; B8 n# y1 Z0 g- H- B& O5 q0 P
9 C7 [( m( @* C; w4 j
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
, l# I0 L1 h, V) a1 r5 i/ [0 A& `# ~0 A
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
1 B* `) E5 O, A$ g& u6 T: i" G; N- e d
Are You Really Sure?
" a' h8 Q6 o1 P: {5 S6 AA blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
1 t# S, \4 y! T
3 A3 `( [# v8 s/ dIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."
9 E& q3 H) e; o- W: [0 J- q- O& ] Y
Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" d4 T/ O' R: ~$ G2 v
" s9 y9 I+ u* h9 o# k
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
* u+ @& X5 Z) n7 k) K3 t1 y5 q7 p; p5 q
Blonde Sky Divers
8 _, V. w: M' ]4 _$ w/ oA blonde and a brunette are skydiving.
( v" L7 }6 l8 P) M+ p9 F( n' v, o {
The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.
; M1 Q% q6 r: U4 O' `( J8 D2 p- k$ y% q z0 Q
She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.
" O3 U1 Z( \: c0 G2 W2 }0 P4 t* E5 z
The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"* z3 t$ V' k6 D% e& b$ r. C& B
1 F0 O! |* V' x) z7 }8 t' s
[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|