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Blonde Car Accident
% i8 ?0 P) j' W$ {, _5 MOne day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.( b9 J, e8 ^+ r K
* d; P$ r' i6 U" G$ H: oThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.$ Y# G5 G1 i) r* o; n6 T2 z
/ z; F7 @3 O$ y4 d H# OHe took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
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Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires., Y" @! R' q4 X8 @6 W( t
c# U+ m' x% R4 b: `7 r+ ^The blonde started laughing.
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& @5 X9 X' O+ ]7 L- iThis made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.1 \/ N0 V; P$ I' t) G8 k
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This time the blonde laughed even harder.' {/ ~+ A1 m4 m! W$ J
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Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
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# s, H/ T- w1 WThe blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
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& |4 g7 v$ e& d3 W# w7 \. C' vThe blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
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Rowing Your Boat
7 o" C8 ]) R2 i cTwo blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
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The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!") o1 u! v& l E: Q* ~
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To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
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I Want to Buy That0 W/ X) c- [. W% s
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
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The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
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) k6 ? s* v. u- M" Y; f6 @The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.( O) h, c2 n5 B0 H! `& Z' I
T; C8 d4 B1 q% z% EFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
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Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. [1 C. u3 a# R( N4 d( ~
" B' H3 m1 R% y5 ~7 [To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.
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2 g+ I3 r9 X) n& M: f6 f$ PThe blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
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/ w& |( _8 j0 K y( R/ n( }2 GThe clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
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Are You Really Sure?% I0 Q3 T+ s3 B; ?$ u# u0 [% o
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"& S) Y3 Y1 v% \# ^& m. G
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In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."4 C9 Q% p9 N r
: j4 x# |7 {7 N% ~% c$ b1 }0 L) l- m8 nOur bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
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The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.", b! f6 g( p& H0 E& U
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Blonde Sky Divers
: E6 k7 V3 h/ n7 N7 I1 {A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.8 V; ^# w' b+ h/ t! y4 W( ]
- ]: i8 {& e3 Q/ VThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.
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& s- M$ ]8 ~9 x: H5 h! u$ jShe pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.
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The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
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[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
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