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Blonde Car Accident' w( H% [9 g; c
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.& f, ]1 I& @) j* `( e+ a! B
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The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
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He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.5 S, n9 Q+ _ ~' _9 V# q) w- M
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Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.+ ]7 K) P' [- I6 y1 f
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The blonde started laughing.8 M) G& C/ d! M; j. u* u9 W' y
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This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
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This time the blonde laughed even harder.
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! f2 T) r3 o/ X0 Y4 M/ M* H7 C9 HLivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.7 u! {+ Y F b6 _3 Z) n- C
# R0 `& Q W; _2 z# m1 h) Z2 v' {The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.) X' ~/ k1 W9 X' f3 V% \
1 q4 j9 t: }+ J a; kThe blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
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Rowing Your Boat
9 {1 j) I+ G. S* ?, C8 t7 yTwo blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
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The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
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# _* V2 S) u8 ~. u0 @: fTo this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
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3 B, {) T: m6 _I Want to Buy That0 U* z1 u7 T& @; {5 ]
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.$ [8 {+ u' _5 c+ S1 g z3 x" X: w
/ A' R0 w( _- L" C: q- |The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
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The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes., ]0 [3 Q7 Q& r" t7 h
4 u4 m# l* l$ yFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
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$ \5 `3 J& ~$ f9 t$ j$ l9 ^Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.. h m* t( K ?) N. Q
3 ]8 R/ v* U8 C5 ^ B5 b: u* @! ETo her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.. M; R9 W6 w2 k( C9 o: x* s! F9 {4 ~
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The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"& [0 w' o7 M# d4 `
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The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"& U. }, X. }* V6 I% r* Z6 {
. B5 @( \7 u' l4 M- O- s7 D+ IAre You Really Sure?
2 o# a" e5 {. v3 R4 E$ cA blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"* W" a, d, Y: z/ \ a. I0 r, g
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In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."% Z5 A H% f( {4 A9 M( P* a
" K6 I5 l$ n0 IOur bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
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6 R. _4 w: W" O( B- PThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
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Blonde Sky Divers7 V, Q( }% [5 u6 j J* D, g
A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.
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The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.: M. y# }/ \! M, Z0 B" ~) b
& x4 R( |8 F" TShe pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.- u* I8 y3 \9 e2 l* \5 W3 B3 R! L7 _
1 w: k& B$ j0 R) V. |The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"' w, ^3 d0 c& v) i+ Q9 V
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[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
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