 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident/ A. R) H0 V6 i% J- K. K6 f
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck./ ?0 z% {" D! R1 }( V& i3 @# {
* b, F+ w( g! l. d( r) g: }
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.! U. R# b8 ?* b5 d0 h& e6 f
: ]& e* y! x8 Z- S! j
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
2 z \4 }! V7 K0 P- Y: D5 F- o) |* d) B- u5 ]
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires., J* I8 Z s+ M8 W
3 a; F/ y+ z0 w% r2 r" mThe blonde started laughing.
) r& w) U( u( O; a5 Z% o' m* w
! L4 m) `/ u2 q2 C; l# O) n" ^# |This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
5 C; C% S" f. w
5 y) w8 E9 `1 A- ZThis time the blonde laughed even harder.3 V4 K) c3 g& x! v1 z x: I
# R2 \) k* S5 O8 |4 Y, Z! B. w
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
- s9 J: r: e. ~3 F; |+ E( Z: t$ f) Q* n) d
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.% T+ D* t: g$ _ ?. R* N& u
, G y1 s' Q: Z$ Q; X! QThe blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
. i" x! D* X, O, h' H& @
( u& j Y% t: q. n# ? l2 cRowing Your Boat
2 m" i' A% Z; r, q( A' ?% C- M, CTwo blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
8 B# D7 p, @$ e s2 C9 O7 q! D4 c, Q* _6 \+ ?
The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
% j. j8 o% A- Z) x# N( Q- c/ |1 |; d U/ ] c( s- ^4 l( Y
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
& ~: V- J1 j% ~) ~8 T4 b* g9 K
. x: |$ q. _% I" w5 b! JI Want to Buy That1 ?. h5 s0 N6 R& D% Y; k& x
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.' P' J' X2 F! A1 i3 P. W8 N
! s0 p% I( I3 J
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.7 j' n% t1 B* _( ?/ e4 B: a3 b/ Y
8 Q4 c; P e( q2 d
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.& o( a/ G7 T" i. W
* h( d" _/ q n" ?5 EFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
0 j7 g5 F' ]. n/ E+ r1 i* w& M+ G- Y" H) a# `5 R
Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
8 |" M) X9 i6 T4 s! V
4 r. @2 r7 t) W3 `2 s4 U" x) STo her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.
7 n) C. Q( `: X2 T+ ~6 a( @7 U7 h) b: X. N4 f/ P+ I% u& d( i
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
$ N4 D9 j2 b8 m( X7 B5 T, X8 u( L7 N$ d! Q: e1 [
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
( U6 @! x* w) L) ^: Q3 {8 H
7 g: ^' W/ ^ t$ G2 Y* YAre You Really Sure?7 b: C: Z/ V8 J, v) {3 @4 T/ |
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"/ u6 [/ k4 r* c$ M$ Y9 H
: p( ^2 {1 v3 H5 R, R/ M
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."
3 f' K3 k% E: F+ x4 ]( f4 t7 a* w( _/ U8 ?& d( W: b& C5 l# p/ p5 n, y
Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"5 j$ ]* R" q: u9 ~$ {+ D. R/ u
3 {" z% V+ J: K8 G6 C7 \The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times." K b2 L$ f3 z9 X
: [# d' ?5 \+ d" y& Z4 v! F0 k+ e
Blonde Sky Divers
; q: d7 G+ @1 P( \- L3 b9 p' FA blonde and a brunette are skydiving.
b1 t: J& ]7 f- W, l$ L
+ S1 I+ y& O3 G0 p5 J: EThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.5 Q/ e) R$ R4 g/ F, [
7 c6 w# D! j6 s/ v6 e2 l F+ W' ~
She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.) i" G0 s" N' w2 g2 S9 M$ R7 E T: r
1 J& U% x% y6 J7 D5 L1 B+ }The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
* [! [. \3 [2 N6 i0 ?! s/ O3 E! k8 E" |" V8 ~
[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|