English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
. G* x1 z0 E/ u" ?English is a stupid language.
' o4 i7 V+ w( I3 h7 ^; CThere is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
" d) N. c5 a* y7 l0 d1 NEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

1 C. ]3 P! L/ c$ [We sometimes take English for granted
: w' C/ p9 T! W) j! y& f4 {" uBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
+ t- u8 M2 }# a. J- w1 `Boxing rings are square
* w  g, Q8 W- s+ g' \And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
( |1 T' O. w* w- S! V% @Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
# e, k/ {) O+ O9 [: F9 M8 RWhy didn't the preacher praught.
" J$ G4 [! u, b' X( B5 Y
) H/ d7 Q0 U7 D2 h8 j5 [2 G" rIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
# ]% ~. b" [6 p# i* p5 S$ c& YWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
% d7 [; U* X" n2 bDrive on parkways

# N# L$ L8 m  c3 w( NYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
$ ~9 k% E! l: kOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
! T" M$ o$ @' l5 F1 A: ~6 rBy filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
; g3 }5 B* Q4 g3 y* `
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
; S- |; M  Q0 c  ?1 R2 W2 f; z7 R(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
% w1 ?* R8 a9 k% h- U- EWhen the stars are out they are visible
: j+ a8 w4 Z1 h6 O+ iBut when the lights are out they are invisible
5 D" z% \* S8 N, [1 @And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
7 J/ H! C) P1 P) E4 A9 c* dBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1 j& o; y/ `1 ^5 k7 a0 E0 P1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
* M( p' E0 |- B' u. K8 G2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
& \3 R4 b3 C1 X* @. Q, b. @- L4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
( X: o1 @5 a' Z+ E其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
, ~: c1 Y6 i! n. v; |- D4 q# l- r" i1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
' _# F( v$ w$ i- X; x  w- t2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

$ h; J5 @; j/ {
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
$ @: U3 t5 [# ]  G4 v实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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* Z7 c' y- R# v% {- e% v9 l

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