 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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; Q6 }& G5 Q KThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:9 ]: j- X/ m/ @, n
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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" M, U+ W |; E( K7 V. K2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.. x; T( F- ~+ }. ^
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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- |# Y6 o( p& c3 r, L6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area: ^) \; q6 P5 M1 l, ~" D( ^
# H: [% [2 | {& y7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.! o& t# k- e2 w* o2 C$ B3 W
( N) J, @, N/ ^8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
0 S8 P3 q) [" |9 I'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'6 B8 C7 N) e% d3 M/ B- [: Q0 s
. [! w% r# v( g6 S! n! r' g9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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. _/ ~' R* W, D- N0 a10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.7 i. `2 M2 r3 Z( P8 F) G$ a$ X
1 N5 k5 }6 j1 B/ J& e1 H n$ X11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!, G; d3 s# ^6 e+ o) r% Y+ j; l9 Q3 o/ m
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) _' e" X6 h6 G15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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