 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol0 F6 {( ]5 V* }6 f: {. B) v! a
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6 X7 i/ P( n: Z6 l5 r) tThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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' V- B4 L4 R9 F2 t3 q1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.4 m8 b6 C3 q3 ?) Z
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.3 c j. J4 O+ A
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" r; n* F4 E! `6 b6 X; s6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area* |& ?7 l# \& j3 A6 F; |
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
) @- y) q5 x/ y/ T$ c! p3 ?'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.2 K6 I+ R" o* Z* J5 G8 w! e( j4 ?4 X
* W. g" W, K# j$ \10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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' M" e/ o. ?# A7 `, d, s11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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# c; y5 i# [: a; Q! Q0 ~; H12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!1 a I# j% q1 s* t& b- n
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And; last, but not least!), j1 ]+ q: T5 D! J
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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