 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol4 _+ d3 {# Z' S# Z& ?
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! N: o4 }* g" A% u) kThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:) a. E9 A: Y9 u0 Q
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.4 b, p2 }4 }) ~3 K1 Y- C, k
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7 {; i+ U, [0 [. q% Q! R1 G2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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0 o2 V6 K4 o$ ^# B3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.* E- t3 P5 d9 w
- D0 w2 L- a2 B9 Z* ~5 ^$ q4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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+ I/ d- ~$ g0 f, g6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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( g) k0 t0 i" \7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.& `' |3 ^* S3 T1 E5 i
8 I; a" L* B4 r5 m& h8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
; h0 y4 i# p3 K4 m1 C'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'$ x1 J- X* X! Q; v L6 b
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.$ a# r4 y& h+ q) V" a' T
! v; Z, A+ b0 w8 G& N' j) g10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.: H* y, J: z W% q3 D
: x) b; s2 X G$ ]8 l12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.9 F# L) r' @# {. Q" }
4 `5 L/ j* b, j13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!$ F5 e$ `) y* J6 B
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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* x/ V$ x1 C [% FAnd; last, but not least!)0 z1 h7 g/ n7 M- \: V6 m: S1 s% h
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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