 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol& B! D+ y% L9 d c v
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:' M' Q" I, S. P% r$ s) S
3 t- ^ ?! R- o+ @) {7 W; f% Z& D1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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, h; ]" [/ ^+ e; G6 ?5 b# b* X8 I3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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9 c; b; j$ [; ?2 J. X6 m4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.: o! V$ Y, [, x) Z2 @0 ~% r
( T* e; I z6 u1 y6 F. |5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away., @) y0 |0 ^/ {
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( f6 N* B; t, r1 |6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask4 k9 d6 H* n0 `
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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4 ^! [; Z* q# p. X, l6 i9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.% ^6 X% c# H/ F, Z8 F/ t, ~
& D6 U8 Z* D" }$ a) x. J8 ]4 i p3 M4 j10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.( `' {+ s, w+ W4 ]8 l& x
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.! ~5 i: e: D! G t
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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! p2 m9 Y0 h) V8 u2 B0 p: w( w13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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" t5 x* ]& u3 ]And; last, but not least!)
! B9 j+ i) |9 w3 U L5 o E15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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