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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:$ q1 q, ` I0 ]$ C
$ b( y: a/ J" r4 {1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.0 x/ `9 g1 I$ J8 r) K8 p) Y
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( N/ W7 t" e9 F6 L7 k* o U4 T2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.8 Z4 n: N9 d) w6 h: y) [
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.& r e5 O, b. ^( a
# U" E0 a5 ?- A, L: X$ r9 N. p. w4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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' u% P# y! s: Q6 Z" g$ _5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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5 H6 O8 F8 Q1 D# Q: L2 D8 h8 s6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.5 I7 ^/ g! g) o! Z+ N# @% w
4 }" \5 Y% l4 {. n6 [- U( A) ~7 ]8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask8 w3 H1 f# W9 X* U1 x$ i
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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% E9 L. i! h1 ^7 M2 ~- [. I; m9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.4 c! v, M6 _$ A- l9 F
/ l$ Y5 d# E3 P) ?2 p7 n10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.5 }' f' T0 w8 |, n" o8 s/ |
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.+ ]% D+ z* k1 w( ?( G; Q3 t
$ Q, q/ d+ a9 I) c" v* U' ?13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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: n# w9 E6 [% a( g# E14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!2 v& h' T: ]$ C r* A
# c$ j t b$ FAnd; last, but not least!)
! C! k8 o2 S* h" R! P15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
