 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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' Q- Z7 h1 e9 f8 M" O+ P) jThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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* q) |# t; ?! |6 [" ]2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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! T& N2 b7 l: ]. ]$ \) x: W& c3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens./ A: Z/ |. @) u, f
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.; L1 x# ^1 x7 K# a4 q, w* a/ i
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6 N4 z4 o/ F1 G- E% |6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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) Z3 k* |3 z- U7 m: c- G7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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3 J: j1 V5 D- @; z8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask9 m* m6 G) Q+ N' n h
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?', S' o' Y3 j' Y0 V
) j1 k4 r! K/ S) m x7 D9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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/ P9 i- @4 G- Y8 |11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)
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