 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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3 d O! X, O( h9 J7 C. P# ] ZThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:. |; s5 |3 F4 K- k+ h) h
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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. P& P( a F6 L; E- p$ g2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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4 I! s2 Y8 W: |* v) c3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.: |% M) J: f! c
7 f i/ A; S: ]4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.' P- M- G% L. X7 M
: c$ n& g6 B3 _0 L3 X+ C8 k# Y: K- I5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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9 r2 I4 U7 x6 G7 M6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.4 Q" V g% }# S
/ D \+ t- W9 e0 H R$ [8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
4 k/ g" B' f5 e; A5 Y/ S8 V'Why can't you people just leave me alone?', \- v% j8 I8 M. Q
% Y8 ?; ~0 l1 g+ e% h3 d+ {# a t9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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% J& w7 D3 ?8 k" @4 M& k! b/ S. R10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.: w L/ \/ W' h. L, @: C, u
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.$ t2 k0 d1 p( C; s* C# o" g
9 n4 P2 R! s% {& Y12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.' E. E6 t0 q! {7 O2 t( l: \/ L
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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- c( d% [5 {8 E0 B14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!$ G- u% t3 J2 v$ b$ I |! ]1 n6 O
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And; last, but not least!), i5 Z% v* H& o
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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