 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol* P; z) E" w6 Y0 b- b5 P
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:0 V" f/ O) G3 Y8 p- J
: i( e) G% T5 A) U% @! @1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.8 u; T* h) Y* @/ T& w; C, y' L
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' t# N F6 V8 g" D2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.. i+ B" j- e- h0 t
! |# ?% ^- m3 w* K$ Q3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.1 Z& C$ P, ?) k. d' R3 I% T6 E
, Q% g/ x0 ?7 G& T" q' m4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.; k# b& E+ W* [$ @4 R
% U0 j1 n2 P8 b* v; L+ b {5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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7 l/ N( |6 i% M/ Z# G) h) \) z6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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( v: S) M! k- ~3 b% q H3 A7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.0 x7 W0 \( X6 o# _) \# G
4 n9 r% w/ ]! ^; P+ ?8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask! r+ k' T0 S; X$ L- l
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'. V) _+ {4 M" y" j' _1 X
# B G6 F5 l% Q7 ]; X; a1 t. e8 {9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.$ p9 @. W8 ?# N0 s: f T, Y
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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$ J: [9 ^2 w1 w- K4 y11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.1 R7 V% h j& `- z
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME! ~8 r' G5 S6 ]6 t
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)& `5 _' i3 j8 _" F
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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