 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:. G2 N: u/ d3 w! }3 ]6 X
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.7 Q6 L: Z6 q! U
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) U0 Y# b' G$ C3 }; ~6 s" E2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.5 ? a8 H& P8 E" I) T; B' t, w9 q* Z
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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6 D2 I! _2 [! s4 w$ J. v# L7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.3 W3 n9 l1 K' D& z, R/ F5 U7 A
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask! t, R, J) w* G6 k% z
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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, W4 i$ ~% [; |# W+ ?6 B10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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! G; V A0 _% C4 j13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!: W0 H+ K7 X* t* g
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And; last, but not least!)
8 b, r1 s* G( s15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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