 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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/ t) y3 M. e3 q( M& s1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.& l& R7 G3 F1 F/ n) ^9 A+ c
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# ~* R6 {( l3 T) Y( T2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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9 Z4 w- `& [" U& U0 B/ X3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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* J- T" B0 s( h, J/ e- r4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens. c4 r9 i! [: x: @; t( _% w9 _
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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1 L g) g `- E, D7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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4 V! g8 I; f V/ E& J8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask( J# g+ ?& ~* o7 k. j$ R
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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) M3 F4 T/ v& D. Z; f9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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# o* k- w. t0 y+ i& R* _10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!' L$ g) Y ?0 A( ?( A- [
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And; last, but not least!)
7 H# x3 @/ i% P9 x& r( v4 b15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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