 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:1 O- t) K; m3 }$ }& b
5 C: V# l- A. U: G0 R1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.% K% @* x- C! G* W! e$ `8 K
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% p( \% M) Z1 N5 P( j; t; @9 J) q7 Q2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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7 w3 r6 c8 B- A$ N( s# x3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.$ o& W% b' d, p, h* n/ f' `( A
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.8 o/ V( `- c9 s; x% k) r8 g& [
/ N; U9 |5 F1 R* p% I% f5 K5 I5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6 x7 K1 ^/ \5 z! M6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.8 r5 u. E1 l3 i' c: W h
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask |# d- L3 B+ |
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'! X4 n4 I# O$ C$ a7 v9 k- k' R
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.+ b% } s0 T. t' M: T
$ f: k: n. r( K4 S10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.+ d) t: t5 @. R5 d, p
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.; g. F, x! I9 W. x- X n
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!) V5 Q2 w1 _: h
# K( p- O5 _$ ?) X6 A8 Z1 B14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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& l, i7 F; T1 f7 LAnd; last, but not least!)
. p* _3 W! _, d( j6 V3 b15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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