 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol% P" T. p6 Z% A* h9 P4 R
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:! C, r; O' b/ n" P* m% B
/ c/ X3 ~! r: f. K' m5 u1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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) A3 b+ f0 O' ]& @2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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6 r. N( \7 p0 }* `' x3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.8 m( y4 B+ c% }/ |( P# `2 h5 n
) ^# z" d' q/ e( q! T4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.2 Z. ?# ?2 {, j% i9 { G0 j: D
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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8 { n8 D. M9 b" S6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area9 q" g- p6 O& p: R' W
& h7 n& @1 [ |) E" E7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.8 }; e( G6 D% Q: ^
" |. ^% a1 e$ Y1 U( k8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
9 C! N7 Y0 [- r7 C9 a'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'$ c! C, W- r- U5 ]# {
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.$ h4 t( g* v% P& c/ _/ K7 w
) G1 K6 |: S6 Q5 c4 m' \; k# D11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme. E) l0 C0 i. i% A3 T+ s
* A) _, ~4 c# z. w* K& H+ d/ q2 s2 ]12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.( H* Q# D* A) M6 w
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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K6 {" {. z+ U6 i; }* |* D14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)
( P1 k4 E4 g" n, ^ t7 `7 [4 V15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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