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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol$ {' n9 Y( z! W+ c% v
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( b6 |5 h7 ~" g" K8 Q$ EThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1 d9 A9 k' Y( X% k8 \! Y1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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0 w6 i6 K- h5 B$ Y% `9 o, j5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area: b! W4 S! D8 s0 r; t1 j$ h
( O( k. X5 `9 Z# Q7 H7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask/ L$ _! @! T4 V& O
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'7 ^" O8 S' z* J
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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* I- ]7 `" N" H5 W10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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9 U5 o) J( T7 I. `$ m' d a11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.) M+ r" k: [; m% D9 ]' m6 e
6 ~2 ^0 |: N# p4 ?12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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- e' G: |; [7 h, m: `) j13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!: P9 a$ u8 \" e5 a( i
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!$ f/ k; B8 k5 R9 U8 b
P9 A5 ?" t. |( G1 u2 `$ K9 XAnd; last, but not least!)
8 T7 p2 w3 U. ^5 F15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
