 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol* j2 ?( R' c$ C* s& x
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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6 f/ T1 b# W! m2 {* U S1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.* y2 q& v1 _$ J J9 V
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.+ }9 u$ c4 W$ I1 T7 k* N, o
) O* L% f8 o3 x& D3 y9 Z7 a5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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+ t' }- ?" |( E; n7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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5 |0 d! m8 a }4 u5 [+ k2 a8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
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# j; a% v3 j5 S0 A& J. T9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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1 ]7 R4 a, E) k; e& J10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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3 a( F \8 t- [* u11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.7 ~0 W/ g+ @0 Q1 d: C' T: {
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.7 U- O4 v$ k" S f, \
# c. n% a7 b( W1 A$ o5 Y' h13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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' a4 W: B2 N7 x14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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) U; B; v% i$ U6 JAnd; last, but not least!)
; n5 @6 S8 l! {" n! N* `; |9 g! |' O15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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