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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol5 E: r" t/ d; g3 v Y! V; a8 w/ b$ q4 V
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2 V5 l0 L- f8 v: X4 JThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:# k) G' Q' Q& n
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.$ Z) R+ C9 ]; o ?
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.' D" N- w8 U8 O- x6 h2 r9 y
& y( P! x0 [+ ^3 `7 X1 S3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.9 }/ [1 z' D! B3 \9 J
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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# W7 B e8 g G$ O: q) P5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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$ D! _/ r- n8 M6 V) `5 e' E6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area1 o3 P. J: }) y# M9 U
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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, @; D; W- P2 @8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
8 E* a' J: m4 o6 z6 K/ _'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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! o- z- E: V- [11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.9 D5 g9 v; u: q: L% Q1 k
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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( h% o! M% l7 i* ^" \13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!% B# x& l( |" Y. I& M8 J* V9 w
& R* y/ R: k) ^7 w' D# K14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)
, S# z" C0 _& M2 Y15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
