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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol+ G1 J9 F9 Q( k: i9 K" E k) G
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:8 b5 g' `8 b8 @7 ~9 X
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.2 b6 ^# @( y! k6 Y# I- }7 K
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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. C) d: K# k; p: h1 J# @ B) m1 v4 l3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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/ n, a8 O; Y' b' h! X( t# M0 V/ w5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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4 r) Z3 K& B9 u, t7 n6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.$ T1 Y4 { ]: y4 y4 A
- ]7 u* ~3 ^' s# F, R% q8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask2 \5 D) G/ T& a! q) ?
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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4 y) q( S( r2 f# p3 O3 l9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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P4 t" c- y# x10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.$ s) R7 S4 n0 H6 z* ^
- U8 d; X B4 T% J ~11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.* C1 J S2 I) N! `3 ?
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.! ?( y5 C9 ~, O1 A7 A
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!+ w- u" S( J. ]/ T4 B" Y0 X, ]
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15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
