 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol, C% f* n7 ^2 x
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' J8 d* V# L9 h0 aThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:! |6 [" f n# |9 y/ K6 D0 s) a, y* h5 k
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.4 K, ], r3 H, K4 G
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. y4 C1 g6 @. ~# Y. j2 @2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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2 c6 O0 W8 M( I- X' @3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.0 ]: O4 e0 o$ U' _
+ |2 Z4 [9 G/ A: e; e/ t( e8 ^ h4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.7 c1 q$ O* H# N
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.# r. R0 B: @9 G, y7 }
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2 H' F0 `' m/ K# p. c& _2 n6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area( }0 d1 o7 s# K: O1 \
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask4 l" e/ M, F2 M! n/ j
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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5 Y; l' N$ s( w! ~8 o% l& o9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.4 j# J& z% W. q5 ?
& f* i' i! x! P E+ j/ A$ S" U# ~10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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9 Q* Y- r- V8 o0 X( c( p3 I11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.+ O! p% E* k, }# w5 F
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!6 p& q9 X& s: ^- `# o
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!9 N! N9 |# V! Y; F$ { }' A- i$ |
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And; last, but not least!)9 ?4 t4 L( J: W [2 ?
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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