 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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& c3 q+ y, P; ?9 t9 A3 u3 D2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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. P+ O6 w$ c* L1 R) ~: {9 l4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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/ N- G( |0 T0 i5 \5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.$ }! u* L, d; W5 m& q6 w8 B) z. F
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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P. ~) g3 a2 K6 m3 z7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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" d# H0 A. U$ g1 T' Q) c8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask& I8 h* Q+ A) K, n3 g3 \# @* W2 `
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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5 E! o$ ^& v/ D" I" P9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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# A6 c" P' l' d( A$ n10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.# N, _! t$ Y. H, A; U$ `" U2 U
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.' C# b6 N7 M, d5 a! ^) {7 k5 F
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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9 d6 W6 g: |- z1 o/ w( SAnd; last, but not least!)
+ u% r$ A& j1 V1 \15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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