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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol" B* d! o: t+ g% _
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.9 s0 L8 F+ A- |3 S! G* q
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) \% Y4 r( O9 V7 q/ c2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.. x8 e' T) t& k- y4 n! i5 R; a
2 t' P/ x7 q7 m( L) c3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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9 O. o% y+ \' n( S+ ?- ]4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.: m O5 Z: l: Q5 }
2 b+ ^- T; V3 g/ w) z& ~0 B5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.2 f6 L4 ~5 _5 p2 N# j
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9 g' q8 q) _5 N3 |2 z/ [/ y6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area8 Z, C, X! w5 R6 u" {5 a$ \
% N- n( C$ a. P' D& Q4 h7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
' j8 A, ?1 k" Q'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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h. l* j2 n& B$ e: m9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.. u' ~7 G' K8 S9 n e- {
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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+ ]% S: U. G/ W- S" p h12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!8 B5 \! K& F; Q d! `. G" G
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And; last, but not least!)5 C# G5 d& }! h; }8 o
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
