 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol' E, ~6 M+ R0 ~8 B
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1 a% G9 d# s" d% _" xThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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; a2 _8 P! y/ P- b u+ E/ F1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking. M' k% e. \+ I/ V% b' Z- M
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( e* w5 k& }6 W; Y5 ?: J2 D2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.( b; f4 |0 ?+ x* O1 w: w$ ^/ C- ?* E
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.. f+ x# d' \; M& @3 y
* N/ V/ p" ?/ n9 w4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.( K3 }. @1 u! V8 h$ { P
* r0 B- M; L" Q& m! z4 y5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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6 v- }" X7 b/ S' L0 R, b8 w- M1 s' R7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, s# O- E6 v, [8 U
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.2 m' ^1 [2 B6 I& Z" n% m& D9 i
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.+ z( ^6 r7 V9 b! y* b
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.9 y2 [6 ]; e& P- r0 Z: r# p# |
7 t" Y' f6 }3 X8 U) p6 ` H S12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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' m4 R) U& g& n9 |13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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1 o4 h2 A) h% L3 ~/ \14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!6 U7 G4 A/ r3 n
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And; last, but not least!)
8 l" z( ?. Y6 S: s* E c# [+ y6 z15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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