 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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3 e" r4 S, s% |Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:8 @+ A1 |5 i) S9 W+ x v3 v6 \
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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7 Z) u" J! H9 u! n' B$ v2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.$ X, r# [: ^; s1 r
3 L' O' h& i4 M! a" I3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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0 g: o6 @7 Y) C: t$ E; x# X4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.0 H& i/ `" v/ C8 a' j
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.9 E- H$ t- y7 p0 B S" V
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# G7 H, g/ a" O6 _6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area9 b' K, ~# X; E4 t- |; p
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
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9 G9 [! G8 g- M- N9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose./ C6 a4 _; S$ U5 S
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)5 c' u8 l& N" u3 Z) e. ~5 D
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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