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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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# R9 p3 a( T: j# A, Y1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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. \8 q, g$ r) U8 N/ f2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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7 |1 m8 I. p/ F: v h+ @3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.* F4 j( y; {/ H$ z" k
6 v! d+ P; z1 J, w% s4 R4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.( U2 N. S3 r+ G( G0 m* \9 {
5 @3 z; [+ X! j/ U" O" U b" f5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.) I' m. A8 v% u0 {. i1 q
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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# N. {1 n* D; ?+ R2 G( p7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask+ M* e! L N. x) s
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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/ ~( J" G2 O1 o9 [" f# g a9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.0 l( f1 P* p4 P- K& j
" }' b% F+ Y- d3 H( A9 Z1 _11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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6 h" f% d* A+ @0 t3 c' r12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.2 J' D6 j7 E8 y9 o
: S6 C% G: [2 W7 R) C3 K5 S+ ]- m13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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1 v4 I2 ?0 F- G; x; g14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!: E- M9 b$ F; v- e9 w
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15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
