 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:3 Z2 ^# Y' h8 E: M, X. Z; p
$ ]% u; H: i$ q) |$ [8 T1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.4 N2 |1 N4 L1 z; n1 @; x
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( g! C- U! d- j1 u. ]! u2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.2 T! \' O3 k* {9 Z* x
3 K) R# z$ N) S9 m f9 a! w3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.5 Y/ i6 V- ?6 e: y
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
6 R! f5 C: }1 |9 e: d'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose. k; t: a s/ Y; G7 l0 y* R
& J _: q+ ~/ k! w$ A10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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# Q4 }( T6 y$ b! C/ C11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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3 @; {4 n7 k9 y5 D& _13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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- X( P5 E) P5 S" r& [* Z7 X! M14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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p5 x5 `9 Y. ^; [% cAnd; last, but not least!)
/ ^6 p% ~. h# S# H) Z15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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