 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:4 H$ Q) o, j$ G0 t$ v. R
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.) |( ]' G9 ~' x' s4 U! e+ h
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9 ~* p5 @( |8 I7 v. u3 J0 T% |5 ~% m: ~2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.: S7 [1 B4 h2 S) a; D
8 C, p5 V% A+ E) t4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.0 B- M; Q6 l" u5 ~
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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2 k( p/ I5 W* M$ u/ C P1 N4 P& g. G6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area- W! E, T" @0 c% I" m. N0 H
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask$ Y( q$ l1 ]7 ^8 @
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'* k+ C _2 p8 H: h4 ]5 }4 j" D
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.9 Q% K7 d" e! r0 L
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.6 }4 B3 ~* l. O4 {$ E/ Q+ p) }: T
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.+ H# E5 i# C; k- u
y3 q) `' `( a7 D$ x12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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4 _. C/ y% H8 ^, ?- b; C0 }14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!) g( @9 [2 h/ ~' q
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And; last, but not least!)
7 l; l, \0 s5 I+ q1 u15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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