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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol8 @7 w9 o7 K5 B; s- u! d3 D
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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! h8 F4 V. F* ^4 w1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.! D* g" H! a) x; m) h
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.; j; k0 g4 ^1 K7 q
9 d" J& p- `; j4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. I! v7 ?" _9 \3 ]
1 s; f+ Y' c* S' W7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.$ z' p/ E! ?) Q' A0 d1 N, K4 Q
* u/ }3 ~/ U, j) x' n8 q) w4 ^8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask' k* B+ I; r3 \) a3 C( U6 i
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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v9 N# S3 l+ R3 _' D3 a- |9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.( ? R ~) @ s7 X
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.+ d1 U8 u: S( h! D! W! V
" ?9 d7 i, k. i- \ ~0 X; |. h/ H11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.: y/ X8 R" T8 j+ r& K( e; S
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.8 b/ [8 t. l5 q) V; A
4 M$ q! Q0 u+ e, L* `* e13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!) Q+ t( ^4 B% ~' \* G
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!2 f/ ^( D) o$ W+ X- j% S
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15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
