 鲜花( 3)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
' c) K" k$ G( v+ P- Z& O' O) o5 t1 `Dad, Daddy, Dada, Papa, Pa7 \0 [/ x6 ~+ s1 ?6 Q4 }
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; j2 f2 M3 E! G& j. P, SJOB DESCRIPTION:' X3 ^& g2 ^! o- t' c# ]1 s
Long term, team players needed for challenging,
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" O4 Q$ x* }4 V$ W C7 spermanent work in an often chaotic environment.
1 f0 E; I+ D( D# z* k. fCandidates must possess excellent communication * ]1 u' V [2 i% a% u
and organizational skills and be willing to work
5 x% T3 |# v) j1 ]variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends C- F/ B/ _5 g j/ O( W) n
and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.
0 m$ e9 A/ h% R' |7 e3 e, }Some overnight travel required, including trips to
" t4 Y. o4 J. z( v4 ?primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and $ l9 b r) n/ X7 M
endless sports tournaments in far away cities! , g9 |0 {! {' J+ P+ Z
Travel expenses not reimbursed.
# z1 b8 W/ N2 o! dExtensive courier duties also required. 3 _, @- a m/ }/ x, n" o
1 ?$ u u# r) v/ X3 ]RESPONSIBILITIES:, h1 k! ?9 U& i2 k
The rest of your life. : w* F f( K* s1 s: E
Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, / N1 T; X1 O" n8 [& u* a
until someone needs $5. ! T# W# |; u2 @( T+ d- n
Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.
( l, |, w1 w1 rAlso, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule
( W; X9 u4 ^3 b9 X+ Oand be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat , @4 y% M( o) q6 B! T& ^
in case, this time, the screams from 5 I, C. B X3 G A/ k
the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
6 z, n& }1 H# _' H' @+ XMust be willing to face stimulating technical challenges,
! p0 q4 N! d" F$ @' l6 V( `such as small gadget repair, mysterious ugly sluggish toilets ' X5 z+ {& N3 t0 `5 V
and stuck zippers.
% f, t" ]( s8 V: d1 JMust screen phone calls, maintain calendars and ) U0 k( }9 R Q! P: ?2 t" |5 L
coordinate production of multiple homework projects. : x6 u; B& x' b6 S/ Z+ _- o* C9 n
Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. % Z6 n. W7 J. |1 ]
Must be a willing to be indispensable one minute,
O5 B" b3 e& v# ~1 r4 Qan embarrassment the next. / w+ P# J0 u4 y' v2 f5 p
Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a - h: I( v. C' c& q
half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. . c' w- u# v8 T* n
Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
+ `9 s8 u) s) y9 f4 `Must assume final, complete accountability for
% U1 H; t3 A1 i9 `the quality of the end product. 6 e; `; t2 q' |: L* m" u
Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and
$ R {! L, g0 Q# r# Cjanitorial work throughout the facility.
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, V6 t6 X6 `" T4 h$ |POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION:) M9 i% ?3 F% N& U' t+ I4 ?
None. + M% J& d! i: s4 m7 g% Z
Your job is to remain in the same position for years,
/ N- h3 y% y3 F" n" Owithout complaining,constantly retraining and + a2 H' ~$ h5 l0 d Y% k1 {
updating your skills, so that those in your charge 5 d8 O! Y5 L. [5 w! w
can ultimately surpass you.
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PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE: ) Y' {: d6 B: ^- _' T6 @" ^6 }
None required, unfortunately.
; E* C5 {2 M8 X iOn-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.
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WAGES AND COMPENSATION: , Z. x2 H; Y# e6 g; L* n
Get this! You pay them!
5 T7 `1 q; |: `; u) xOffering frequent raises and bonuses.
0 Z5 W+ ~% W8 _/ S4 Ya balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because , \# G4 y0 V2 ^
of the assumption that college will help them . o1 _) o5 Q7 g5 ?7 }2 Y" l/ o, e
become financially independent. 7 F( Q( f! I3 n( t" i( o) s
When you die, you give them whatever is left.
0 p9 [% i6 \" f/ Q+ y7 F/ CThe oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that 8 ^3 w% C2 u" ^' S
you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.
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BENEFITS: 1 d. G$ h0 Y2 i6 d- M
While no health or dental insu! rance, no pension,
7 Y, U& i! }. f8 w) v/ Uno tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and 3 s/ I( w- y. i$ B, u
no stock options are offered," p$ s$ [1 d, Y0 z. n1 Z( Q
this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth,
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( E3 Q& k$ ]% u0 x4 R2 o2 S" Cunconditional love, and free hugs and kisses f$ O- i) d+ ~! {8 ?$ c
) }- _* b0 i+ j `3 G- B$ h1 ~for life if you play your cards right.
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** AND A FOOTNOTE: THERE IS NO RETIREMENT -- EVER!!! **
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Forward this on to all the PARENTS you know, in appreciation for everything they do on a daily basis, ) a3 r3 u+ n0 h( l
letting them know they are appreciated * h% q. u/ U. \9 [/ q; ^- A: @
for the fabulous job they do...
: x, ^2 N; N/ v6 e7 r) Jor forward with love
) Z' R/ U9 d# x# h4 vto anyone thinking of applying for the job.
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-4-24 11:47
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显身卡
发表于 2009-4-25 07:19
