 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.+ G6 B: L; y2 ]0 E
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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9 N+ w5 l) ?/ P4 W+ s& U2 C; B' K# KI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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4 \: a3 m6 @5 bI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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* r1 {. x2 m& M8 @"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?2 Q8 o; j( t) {: C5 b4 T9 k/ O" t8 \- T. O
+ K5 n1 X. x* G) A/ P- i: RAnd the second one was:6 Y. F _- b. A4 p3 ^# o* F9 c V/ N
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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, w4 w9 O# d8 q6 y$ L: PI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?; o3 q" b, Y' @3 d' y7 w: |$ |# v
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?" X" m+ q' c' \8 a
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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3 x5 x* d d/ g0 mI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen." a: y: n* ^ @* Q
& O5 J/ a5 K+ lSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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' x* X5 g9 v/ A0 e5 O6 ~Thank you very much!
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# Y8 s! ]& _- {/ _: r8 N: |' bImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:* G. \. p, G* v- _5 L6 u& C# S
$ |' I% X8 F. _. b1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill." P% m8 a. j, c6 p) M
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.7 X* [4 K% T. j, F. S
9 b9 Y; x* D" w6 x# N: `$ `1 h% {4 E, u"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".8 B4 W7 f9 Y8 L* r; A& f
$ c5 L; A. ^# j8 N/ t- S9 PRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.3 j G% P0 y4 C2 A2 a
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
