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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.8 |, @  K0 o& l0 ^

" G/ u& y) m2 r* `I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.( p( X& a( b7 A2 F: N3 S
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 h" P4 S) W* r! ~# r) `8 ~

) M( V0 ~: g* y# D; l  f* G# J"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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# U5 A/ ?% F( d; g" {I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ j/ r( n1 Y& K: B
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"6 A  L. t4 }: J( v6 y

! f+ T7 N( j- c4 G6 |0 y. t  P8 g/ EI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 Q' s  Z" N* ~: f3 i

# \, p8 A8 Z/ i! ^"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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/ F8 {9 i% ]+ sI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?# ]2 D0 r: `$ `

# q0 W0 U' _) m- |I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!) s8 j4 a9 \7 ^" a& G7 x

4 k0 E6 u; r# D5 oI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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4 C0 y9 J$ s4 }( j" U4 [So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”! a0 E" }* d5 B( J# v

# e; o* K; Z" r" l% B7 m  cThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.. x# M% Q+ w( w

2 h9 F. E  L: l1 ]; ~Thank you very much!' b4 v6 Y  V5 c1 ~3 ]* F/ U0 a

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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:; Y& W% N$ l+ e( T! v

6 v  D* Q  L2 C% ^1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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% K8 D# p: d' O8 U2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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  h& Z  W5 G, j' R1 @( s"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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, Z/ ^( I0 \6 D, `Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".# @% g. F# S9 u3 R1 t9 p
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: $ J3 N# G+ D$ h8 _' [1 O; y5 z6 g6 O
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。5 n' P: U7 s4 a: l4 g
怎么理解?
. q0 }" t- O- g) F% Q) w9 v& j50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 5 u& v+ o5 @- N! \

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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
  O" p0 W: ?0 O! e& h怎么理解?2 ]5 _3 J4 O/ c# v
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
' S$ O4 x( D7 o5 l2 \cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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7 ^! i: C' J+ i7 s) s, \我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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