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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.$ Q* n/ O3 b! L" u, Z3 ^

/ G* X; G; l6 J4 nI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.& T* m; s/ k+ v: i8 P

) B4 o" g3 y( q( M6 q' j' @4 eI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:6 O% S! P3 @9 J6 t, F' u1 l1 Z$ s. P' t; H

6 }% k2 P$ T' n) K5 p1 o7 O"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"8 }" Y/ n6 `' a
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?1 X4 n% O, [( d+ |" O9 Y: Q
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And the second one was:
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3 y8 B: y. I9 H( A3 x; {6 s"What's the 2nd Amendment?"8 X! C- Y& Q& Y) m" P! V  c7 K
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?; X! j' }. E2 c3 S# P! }- _$ h( L* e# B
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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% h' ]8 s( S: N- y1 tI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!3 o6 x% N) A( I, `& h

& O& E) J- X2 x$ Y2 rI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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1 S# q6 H( H# x7 x2 zSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”. v9 t* B& c" H3 D( _0 p

4 y3 U, E! W3 \7 yThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!+ u$ t; x0 s* d4 k5 {
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) f& m5 J: I7 Y1 i4 }4 [6 r" kImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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' T) M: g, X8 D  T6 Y( s; C% k9 Q- e1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.$ h# G3 A& r  u0 ~# F

! t$ W) v  g7 r1 Z; @$ v* p2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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8 k, ]- x" A! k- t3 Q; f"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.$ Q; h1 Y* x* Y% Z  l# q3 u5 V
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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" |+ e# H( ]1 Y+ ]# V4 v; bRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.& W: Y/ Q+ @( k6 Q
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 0 s. ~6 y* o1 I5 c! m
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
4 j+ Q6 V8 c0 u" X) h+ ~" F9 Y& O1 |怎么理解?
4 D) i) ^6 d' u6 e/ D8 V50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 $ r. N# }' r% |" ]
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
# m+ O" x  w4 X# A) J! L怎么理解?
" i/ Q) _9 p3 p' ~1 }50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
9 i! X+ ^0 U: I% J( r1 q! _- Tcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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7 c. Z; O- _# N* q4 R我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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