 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.6 K1 n7 t4 t% k& V+ k% f( ]# g
. p/ \3 ^* Z. GI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.8 B+ K1 j$ K! h! u# `9 L2 O
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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6 N# ^+ F0 u) b! H" k"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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5 ^2 T) Z9 S! V' tI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?5 ]5 H3 h- `! f) Z: L
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And the second one was:; b8 J: @5 u( N8 Q
1 n. z/ J7 Y- m5 C& X: D3 {"What's the 2nd Amendment?"2 W* e1 Z5 i5 F/ q5 u
& \( L1 C' V$ Z5 r% eI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?! ~) g" @. P. ]4 d
4 U, f3 M( H" U4 g3 K! Y9 e& ]"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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: Z/ y9 B, I1 f& E% G0 ^, @( {& b, jI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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8 p2 ]6 ]; R: {$ BI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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6 Y0 x4 Q6 V$ J: |Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”; X e% n9 I/ D' I1 }
+ J* W/ v/ R) l1 x0 e) XThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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0 i6 X( ?7 M; t) BImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:7 K# p5 f* R. v' p5 I; z3 p
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.' Y( @. j7 } S" N/ J
7 a1 Y+ u; N% |: Z"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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, b( S' U k1 s1 hRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
