 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe., B- T1 [/ E0 N
4 f+ W0 l* E+ c' w9 R( Z. E. qI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.' Z. C: z" Z& n3 }; s
, g3 ]& D# i1 k! ~I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.. r6 L J( m+ p7 {! e2 ^
- E' l7 ]" }0 sI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?": a4 V) C6 W- ^0 c9 I! [1 n5 }, E
. k* I/ C6 f- @2 g, H, `: PI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? i( ^9 E3 T0 }7 k; r( t7 n8 v# Q. x
0 A7 q6 Q* o% ~And the second one was:: x. ^: D6 [' h' X0 g" i
3 Z, G! J; T2 \) b5 b"What's the 2nd Amendment?"3 N; K4 s# \1 r) g9 N: Z
) l: k- Q a5 ^+ ~% t# B3 D) kI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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% h* c3 U& n1 N6 h0 d4 [" D"What is Roe vs. Wade?"3 j/ K1 \' q. R: p
3 l" U. Y% v/ Q; ~' N2 |8 O6 vI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!* p. I2 H8 [$ ^: l0 \
" r7 q- @" ]6 B. e1 e% K( E: QI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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( `4 Q& K* }- @ B5 S1 r" U6 gSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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8 G3 p2 A+ u5 Z/ PNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”6 P9 x% o% P" F9 q ]! L* E
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!: {5 I, U2 n! C; F; W+ K
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) N( H- y. A' e+ ^( B' z$ PImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:: m% p# y" U# u% |" \9 c" N$ t
. L; Q. N/ j G# d0 H8 L- j1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.* v. h; ~; F/ s% A6 ^2 t, w
$ \" O' u8 q$ o8 U2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.6 O5 G3 y. B! A5 c) X+ A
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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0 ` G- r% ` ^9 o; R, Z4 DJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States"." i: I2 {; S0 Z6 {) C7 v. w
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.( B% _) e4 ^+ ~7 v7 x
% H+ a: J0 ?' j" {The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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