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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.6 r, e; W! k9 @5 @: `

4 _" a8 H  W9 w9 PI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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4 ~4 e+ r; j$ g3 B3 U+ \* G"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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/ F5 ^, K* N7 x$ \I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?- D1 B9 ]' U0 |
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And the second one was:7 K, [/ v. ?: ?8 U" v* u  M

1 |/ q, S  {6 ^& U"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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4 ~! J8 a9 c/ z7 U0 oI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?' c5 r+ ]9 {+ z6 u- X' O
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"  Z* o, i1 k% o# k. i/ R
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?, b5 F- a2 ~+ {) S

, n& @3 C+ v) N" \I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!  D4 M3 Q! U+ }4 m# F- `
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."0 Q* C4 V, @& ~, O. o& z$ P  _
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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7 C! K4 \5 Y9 F2 h" T$ G- }Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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. W, N; c3 G+ U8 S' qThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.' W0 B4 l) K- m" B, {) D

. {+ Q$ {. J* s- K  nThank you very much!
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: {( U$ \- M: Z$ V1 c9 T7 g& IImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:( {" C- H. W: r3 g9 Z9 q
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.. W2 L; K1 \! d3 h  E( d9 r2 @* k
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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: [4 J' h' @  s3 _& N8 L"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".% @" J6 v/ V/ o  s- L  o
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.8 J9 \+ `2 e, p: p7 X

( M' G0 [9 ^3 V. `1 R, }7 n3 rThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: ) }& c6 r2 c4 V$ V
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。- w- I! r6 R. p2 S, n* o2 Z& [, |
怎么理解?
* R. R9 U$ \- p5 }/ Z! o) u50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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" J6 Z, R: @% e) U; L6 g" f, s不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。2 B1 r5 d% s3 F6 |$ J
怎么理解?9 A( N2 n# ^1 |5 Q5 {- f
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?1 I' E. o7 }% |/ R" j6 N
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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