 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.0 p$ a/ o+ s7 O6 ^
4 y# } P5 V0 ` m$ |I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.; s# G3 j3 x" d- J
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:4 Y9 t3 S. X3 ]0 u6 G
4 w6 h6 M) M- `& m" t"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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, {% E1 J# g7 |0 |I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?") E( N: w/ r9 Q+ z; m6 y! C( [
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?% w8 R) ]9 t0 e2 Z% ~. j* B
+ h8 {- |3 S3 i* d"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!. L, D: P% P% ~, h$ b$ s
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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5 ^0 r5 f$ U7 n: s/ e. R) V+ b% fSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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0 E0 G; M% o- q, WThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.8 w9 N5 C7 b7 E5 [% R; d: W
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Thank you very much!$ \" y1 m4 s! d6 ^, d2 l
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7 F& w$ O/ v: [: O# C. H7 XImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:2 n2 a' d- n0 O& ` m. r( L
2 }* ]0 L" a( z( k C" |1 v1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.; H" \% m( O6 ?. e
; C Y8 ]$ }7 K, I E7 z"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.1 F4 c- Y( H! q
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".5 g- Y& J& ~! b& J
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.1 o2 @/ T2 V7 V# T0 B9 x9 h
9 C+ ]- ?5 O) L( V9 @* o: HThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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