 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.8 |, @ K0 o& l0 ^
" G/ u& y) m2 r* `I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.( p( X& a( b7 A2 F: N3 S
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 h" P4 S) W* r! ~# r) `8 ~
) M( V0 ~: g* y# D; l f* G# J"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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# U5 A/ ?% F( d; g" {I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ j/ r( n1 Y& K: B
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"6 A L. t4 }: J( v6 y
! f+ T7 N( j- c4 G6 |0 y. t P8 g/ EI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 Q' s Z" N* ~: f3 i
# \, p8 A8 Z/ i! ^"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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/ F8 {9 i% ]+ sI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?# ]2 D0 r: `$ `
# q0 W0 U' _) m- |I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!) s8 j4 a9 \7 ^" a& G7 x
4 k0 E6 u; r# D5 oI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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4 C0 y9 J$ s4 }( j" U4 [So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”! a0 E" }* d5 B( J# v
# e; o* K; Z" r" l% B7 m cThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.. x# M% Q+ w( w
2 h9 F. E L: l1 ]; ~Thank you very much!' b4 v6 Y V5 c1 ~3 ]* F/ U0 a
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:; Y& W% N$ l+ e( T! v
6 v D* Q L2 C% ^1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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% K8 D# p: d' O8 U2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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h& Z W5 G, j' R1 @( s"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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, Z/ ^( I0 \6 D, `Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".# @% g. F# S9 u3 R1 t9 p
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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