 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.& U9 O! ]9 W; _/ p4 u7 B
* U0 v+ L# z# ~9 j% CI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.6 v, P9 P; _# W% n& U
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.! W9 U( A( l% g, I7 I+ f
. _6 E% B& l" ~6 B- s4 e8 @I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:9 T$ v2 s# P$ `7 i- Q' O" t
5 W# J+ R3 `) e' ~8 r: T3 T"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?$ F( V2 V( p7 W( J" {6 @! \& v
k& J4 r( P& t7 RAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?" ^& B# Y2 R6 J! X, g2 e+ P
+ p1 ^ m. v% P$ S2 ]/ [+ } x0 cI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?) [; z0 I, i: [2 u/ A
2 ^7 |2 j$ d) K9 o"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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8 ]/ C+ c. u/ c9 }9 [. N) bI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?+ H- X( s; x. U8 w$ h
! d7 Y, P1 _! mI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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+ M5 L2 A s7 B3 q1 H, XI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."+ n" w) x4 i& G" Y7 m4 E* E+ w
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"' ~2 c7 ~4 T! P+ S2 U! a/ \+ T
/ k* |) \2 g) PNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.& p5 p1 j4 g4 t
* i$ j6 h, U l( r: r. o) ]Thank you very much!8 p: R8 S4 O$ y
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$ B4 ~+ I N J# yImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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" `7 Y; Q, w; Q( a! @6 c2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.2 u: M ]" v" p- ~+ p+ |
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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" T# D5 E; `& @; B, x( P) J: F, _7 `* K, V, ?Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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/ H1 n7 V9 a7 n7 v- X: `The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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