 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe., X6 T6 C ` `2 J0 j: Y! ~
2 J& _5 { o4 U/ ^I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.3 S+ f5 R5 }; U. p& e
3 K. j3 z( N2 a7 o9 [I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:# J" u. o; | Q
9 K2 q2 R( \$ `- p0 r; S$ C. u"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"2 x% X" a4 V" U! x' ~0 h- l, U+ a
$ _2 I+ V+ N7 k% x* f( ]I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:$ R+ s# ~. U$ A: J$ Y
" [8 j8 w# }6 j. X4 J' R# G"What's the 2nd Amendment?"( }$ B1 q1 r. z: N5 K
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ }$ @- m' c( h6 K( B+ ~9 w7 E
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"% { z* u$ k' g- S0 [
' h+ R3 h7 {5 c: K" k7 ]! b3 q- OI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?8 z+ ^. q0 h( n* D; V& d2 u% j
$ R1 j, U2 ^7 n$ A8 U( ?2 p# H/ QI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!! a+ X, I( X1 S5 o* r* Z" A9 O
/ ^0 k) W) d6 K6 b- u, mI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."6 }' J! _& M+ ^$ ?6 U. W; R, |0 b
7 q- Z8 w1 g" ]So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.! |% Y' N3 N" Z5 r5 h L
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:: e5 C' j6 s/ j% R+ B
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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3 N- s) f' A' C9 N- q2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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: y4 I* x5 ?+ Z9 U+ _1 Y8 ?"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.& c9 q: U- A1 Y9 G
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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" C3 d: U1 _2 W a; o0 p0 P: WRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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