 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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" H9 K$ Z: t: B0 a2 C3 mI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 T) E: m; F, \
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"! K, d+ Q5 M! y% P6 R. o: t
. Q2 A1 i/ a) N q3 }! @) dI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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8 u" F% p3 k- k) N$ L$ DAnd the second one was:
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, w+ u$ Y& g+ ]. T, H/ k"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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4 g% e( W3 ~7 A6 M I% W% bI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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. j2 U2 ^5 v4 ?6 p* n5 X"What is Roe vs. Wade?"( e9 |% M. h2 G: w
1 V* g8 S' \( R5 MI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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. Z0 U6 [, v7 [1 I4 }/ sI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!. y! G; P; E8 D" z$ ?' K B
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."5 W; ]4 j9 V1 o5 T* \& R) g* \4 v
3 R& e- W( y9 Q$ B) ?So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”/ p6 ?# i& Z0 J4 G, i8 ]
! E, \6 a" t" pThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore." c2 u3 Y4 X& g! t- C
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Thank you very much!
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3 [$ o/ `; ]7 I5 j- ^) y) ~==========================
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: h4 R% V! W" V2 q; i0 IImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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" Q2 Q& w0 ^% u# ]1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.6 ~: Y: m# B3 I
* H( J1 _& _ _9 c4 y2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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/ A+ v+ S3 D' Z' W"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.9 Q' |3 g* {, {3 |; E* }
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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" e4 y) [) }4 R' i3 hThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
