 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.) I9 }" W2 F2 [7 P
0 f3 k% t9 A B# tI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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3 L7 H. m/ T H"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?) R' F( }" M6 h6 e7 y* P9 w
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And the second one was:
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8 r' D; F. K# D$ T1 ]"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"& v, h8 d4 R% W1 x
; z% T9 I G" v9 A4 `I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?# ~( k% m2 U& {/ ]) w0 z% Y% ?, h
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!1 ~. R7 f# J" W: w& Q- k: o/ H8 V
0 y u) ?, x: q. \* b3 r# x: W5 qI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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. x7 ^% S+ i- }# R iSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"/ H1 s9 e% M* \1 Q
# Q+ J& ]" a: N' j1 p* b% INow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”# p- y( x8 _4 z$ o% F
# Z% S! {2 |& r5 NThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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# Q$ h, M. V/ f9 B. h- j/ r( M7 zThank you very much!. S5 C; I0 e' c3 I. n
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$ V3 v1 X! \& o) mImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:6 C5 Y0 Q8 z) v: x
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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; [& n: `5 K: K% P( ~* @8 _2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.5 w7 i* z0 ]% n. a# D
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion./ P X' R. n/ P9 C n9 c
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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& v) \* w7 K6 N2 F' E1 sRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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0 V$ e! s3 j9 D% f, Q% y, m0 E5 XThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
