 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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! t, I, ~4 K0 t* K9 i. h) YI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.4 O0 x0 o" t+ H
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.. t6 z v1 B% j/ U
0 ^ T) S! \ C0 [9 B) UI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:+ v5 s. s. C; H8 p
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?, i- l/ X' e, i* `; i
L7 ^5 s: }! I2 X5 TAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"+ U4 l2 [/ _9 o _8 \
. E3 M( Z0 t7 I8 iI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"( t1 K- Y) Z! T; K
: D4 x5 e; A" U+ f. j9 mI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?, M5 g0 ?- T) ^" [( h
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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" [" |6 _3 R/ _9 \. Y2 ?I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."2 j9 }, D, g8 H; [$ C
0 ~/ x$ r) k1 O2 @) ]; wSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"/ g' r/ n4 U( `' X- e$ {3 t4 e& c
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”) _; q4 ~* N% j
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.7 q' `5 s6 p) h1 c3 I
6 e/ n' K: R+ o. p. c, oThank you very much!. d5 e+ |0 ]8 ~5 T
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\3 B3 m2 N& n3 U* d3 V# Q# ZImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.4 p9 l3 G' I$ J) c( S
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.; e9 f" U$ j3 e E8 F* `6 I( ]
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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3 U- C" m. x$ mRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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