 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.! S) ?2 S2 B0 c0 c; @9 ^& c, L2 ?
0 Z7 W5 Q; M$ I! F9 b# FI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.# d7 G6 n+ |& T* U* o
$ g, l3 {, w" V' d- j& j2 RI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:& z* w- y7 u; |2 `3 e' S
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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! l6 M) q( F' @! G$ G, E"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?. `+ O( Z9 e& m( _* V5 E( U; [+ k, s& u
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."! A- T* ~9 M6 s5 b5 S+ n! c
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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* x+ |& t; Y% O. O& r4 NNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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0 \/ u3 V/ O. a: Z- g0 b# \& WThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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5 ?- y! p- H( B4 K q: jThank you very much!: D& I# I$ |/ l7 p6 T/ a/ J
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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, i8 N3 L$ q# }& |" a1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.$ B9 Z! a8 B. i8 n) P9 s
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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( F1 Y; i/ v: H- VJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".% g9 i z7 G' e! q3 Z! n+ F. j
) R- B/ U9 R; v2 j. s! S+ aRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.. \& @" | a9 m" Y3 w. u
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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