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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.4 D3 ~& \' y2 M& A& C
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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) Y$ c+ k: A. d7 y6 _+ fI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:) F5 Q- ?/ A9 ^2 E# \) s  t" T

  q0 y2 E& Z3 \+ R! K"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:6 u+ p6 N& x% |) s  u

6 q+ P: S9 L% S- m# L" Z"What's the 2nd Amendment?"3 }  j6 ?- c3 i7 r/ \6 a, x4 F

: ~0 H! S4 F) |0 q2 {; K3 EI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?, X. X& C1 W4 h' L0 y7 H1 T# y5 _

0 F1 Q1 D( s7 |3 ~% S7 G"What is Roe vs. Wade?"4 q4 U0 w. @" |" D. ?* }
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?  t1 s3 n; i4 Z, y( g
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."9 ?: W, I% a  ^$ o

8 V& ~; ~5 Q! |7 H" OSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"/ K# r* P+ i. z) o, Z7 R! B& ~
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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6 _. c6 T2 n% T0 z1 H6 I. [  f2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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( g9 S, q6 P8 w8 D/ K0 U"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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& n- u9 Q0 v# h9 }% aJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".; F# W& T1 @4 e

5 n/ b6 u# Z0 T! L8 J, r" T! xRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.. e/ b. j; ]6 k6 P" J7 m

) a) a/ O% C4 Z" v9 H+ SThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
0 [# V$ R) t4 E, q8 [; E5 F! Va young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。& ^6 ?2 N! ?1 g: T* z2 G% D1 e
怎么理解?
7 h! S% O  z: a7 j50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。, H3 Y0 w9 P! Z6 D% f
怎么理解?
4 L' M0 s. n: G8 M50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
- A5 ?. R. T+ Kcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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: Q* S, X) i4 j, L$ A6 ~5 R* a# i我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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