 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.8 ^- t! R4 B, ~/ |3 J% U( y, M
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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! d9 M! H* M% g1 t) L"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"5 \0 }; ^) r0 I! k
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 m$ a7 f& V( L6 v2 j( C; e
- e: q' _+ s+ M( iAnd the second one was:
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# @( m q% U# u1 `/ c" w$ m5 O/ e"What's the 2nd Amendment?"8 @4 G) J- i; O8 k! C: T1 q! W
* L: ]$ P e4 S8 f; kI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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( A$ M) K. a) g$ h2 P"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?8 Z1 R* \ q# H. k; h7 c
# e7 b! D) f6 a* C! o4 {1 X# [9 o7 \+ cI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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4 L" C/ X$ W5 \) ~I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen.": l0 S# o1 _' r ^) f7 x
6 ]. b! C) d" W5 A% Z, GSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"/ h L: o& k! \* f
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”1 G; j) W0 X$ ?/ F% \+ |
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.1 g' R& B# j! \- u! i6 k8 I
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill., n' Y' j" |2 O( P/ F1 p+ z
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.1 e% a/ m6 O5 v; _6 S, [
& t, d5 {; ]/ n; E: G" Z4 `Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
