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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.& ^2 U2 b  I, P, D1 P$ ]" w
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.+ [  |2 W/ \. I8 c" U- C

: }& h1 `' D- x# ?7 ]" U' RI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:. i: B0 p. F3 U8 j4 a' `

! c; d  N# d& l$ e3 B# W3 C9 u$ i. z"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:  Z; p* T: f4 N7 ^9 |
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?". j  d, t: D; t- t9 S+ v

8 p0 o& G! Z1 O, q; h* L; @I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?( S0 t* i7 y6 \! S/ j( S% K2 w3 I
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"# Q# K/ V% I. q% Z3 e' D6 Z

+ g0 M  J# @% o' KI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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2 V; y* F# [/ K% E8 e/ X9 ]4 @+ TThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.3 R5 g8 r! C8 n7 \, z) _- `
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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2 N! F/ B8 S0 P: l5 O2 g"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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; m2 o7 h+ W  T0 f7 UJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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$ c0 Y+ G5 d( G# M4 l  QRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US./ {6 ], P9 x' `7 F. J, |
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
( O5 \8 y& v* @1 w# i; qa young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
7 M4 [; [# c/ n4 I8 a怎么理解?
% P* t4 F% p9 l7 j( r* W8 r50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 2 K0 Z" l6 n( t- t! q6 i7 G

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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
' F# ]/ m, [# r, y( `- H8 n怎么理解?
" Y3 d$ `5 F, A, }& o50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
6 t6 h, v* j" r3 X1 G% ^cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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8 g% Z. m9 D/ |6 g8 S% B我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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