 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.$ n% y1 F5 u7 u2 U
' M6 s1 |$ P+ I' a* nI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.; H9 F0 ~) b0 b8 g5 ?+ a
+ y+ Y3 g- H0 n5 F' o0 `* AI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.8 d' M! Q* I+ d6 A1 @! g0 _# L
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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, `1 L) N( K. P s k$ LI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"3 W1 I" | ~. C7 ]& ]
% v% T {" n0 HI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?( k/ O/ b1 J6 V/ P# P) G4 ?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"" }3 \% M4 P) d$ _
. q5 w5 {& T9 j0 u9 FI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?; P# ?, F6 ]) c: m4 \ _- B+ ~' {
8 B- f% w- I; ^# D [6 g! SI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever! y5 S& x5 ^/ L9 F
4 ?! M4 q' b) r7 n) N- N6 R* K* UI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"! ]6 E6 y' R2 a
, S* o9 ?) _5 c$ A; z y8 WNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”/ m% k" d" ?0 r' l& r
/ A' X6 m; I2 i7 n. j$ L5 ZThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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5 [; _7 S6 @- AThank you very much!# H( k* a5 J9 u$ K# S
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I. n. F: P; U6 B$ LImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:1 z# C+ g4 z3 O% }
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.& v v$ j$ u4 q$ Z4 }2 r) L$ a9 n
* e' H. H3 t ]; w: b8 `) m' M8 Q2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms., h0 [# v+ x' y( [9 C6 b4 t7 A# n( k
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".4 c8 u6 E0 b, G- p1 H8 V) V; W5 u+ }
/ n7 D5 d% K7 C3 [Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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- p1 j$ @- V/ i8 s1 DThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
