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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.$ n% y1 F5 u7 u2 U

' M6 s1 |$ P+ I' a* nI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.; H9 F0 ~) b0 b8 g5 ?+ a

+ y+ Y3 g- H0 n5 F' o0 `* AI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.8 d' M! Q* I+ d6 A1 @! g0 _# L
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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, `1 L) N( K. P  s  k$ LI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"3 W1 I" |  ~. C7 ]& ]

% v% T  {" n0 HI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?( k/ O/ b1 J6 V/ P# P) G4 ?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"" }3 \% M4 P) d$ _

. q5 w5 {& T9 j0 u9 FI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?; P# ?, F6 ]) c: m4 \  _- B+ ~' {

8 B- f% w- I; ^# D  [6 g! SI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!  y5 S& x5 ^/ L9 F

4 ?! M4 q' b) r7 n) N- N6 R* K* UI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"! ]6 E6 y' R2 a

, S* o9 ?) _5 c$ A; z  y8 WNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”/ m% k" d" ?0 r' l& r

/ A' X6 m; I2 i7 n. j$ L5 ZThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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5 [; _7 S6 @- AThank you very much!# H( k* a5 J9 u$ K# S
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  I. n. F: P; U6 B$ LImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:1 z# C+ g4 z3 O% }
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.& v  v$ j$ u4 q$ Z4 }2 r) L$ a9 n

* e' H. H3 t  ]; w: b8 `) m' M8 Q2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms., h0 [# v+ x' y( [9 C6 b4 t7 A# n( k
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".4 c8 u6 E0 b, G- p1 H8 V) V; W5 u+ }

/ n7 D5 d% K7 C3 [Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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- p1 j$ @- V/ i8 s1 DThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 3 x- n0 K" l) _5 {1 W+ c
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。( I2 a  H) ^/ u$ J* m
怎么理解?& {3 Q- ?4 i! m3 [, j
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。" E' p7 i4 a1 v
怎么理解?
# P# B6 p$ s$ u+ I9 k50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
  e" I1 ^% ?! d7 E. b+ Xcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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5 ^! q/ m; g+ C5 L我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 : }  ?4 Y  P  U  ^: e1 ]9 O
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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