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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.0 t+ C8 o4 ~8 i# M  `0 d: O3 ?; x

2 n! F8 h) T+ n' w! rI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:+ O: L. D5 s5 }
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"8 n$ E& g1 ^# b- W/ J9 g: ?
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?! g1 ?( }* S; y" c: o

8 U5 }; N7 u) s3 g7 Y7 u2 ]And the second one was:+ [0 w$ f5 G8 m  y# p

$ I) A" y1 V! o; |( J"What's the 2nd Amendment?"8 Y0 ]' E& d4 W/ w9 @7 j3 s9 D& i9 G  N

: l8 ^) z9 ^1 [0 sI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?# J1 [; n$ ^. L% B! |2 s

3 X$ A$ C' O+ n4 i0 B, N"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!' S; `/ p, D4 P& q& v
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen.". u9 }$ e% _, w0 x- Q# h& d: R

; f( t. M; _4 a* k# |( V3 `So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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, M2 B8 O/ K7 T3 R9 gThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.2 W0 j3 U7 z* R, |4 z; D& a
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:( C5 T5 D5 n0 [
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.$ U# W& v1 V( q

, |) g  x( N  F' W" }' I2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".# G: X7 t( W; W: Q. L
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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, _/ ~7 \& X8 Q0 BThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
+ D" K$ ?7 N% R& j" Z* E& Da young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
" m' r! S& p! W. T4 W怎么理解?
; L/ ~) P! U% E. m50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 . i; B8 H; K, ~" ~$ O6 ^: C

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1 S( k( @( _! s, y! Y不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
1 B8 U. L; ^9 O4 e怎么理解?
) u: {5 D, t' D( e50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
0 Z/ ]6 d: k/ v/ |# X* Pcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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, u1 u. N! v! ^% J我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 $ G9 T- r/ f) A) B! i

. R; v1 m0 h& ]我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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