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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:4 |+ j$ A# O2 |) n3 W) ~- Q

; k) a, y9 a  X- W$ S1 J; A0 O"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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. j9 S: Y" R, K- ^" N! \% mI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?9 G3 g8 W9 T3 Z

3 H( y  p& O8 Y6 s9 L; |* J7 ?2 ^And the second one was:4 a  j" ^' ]' d9 m' V% `
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ F  V7 |! E+ g7 j/ b$ v

4 w7 S; L5 V8 v  z$ @1 S% d; A"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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$ V7 j5 Z' K; }) r- KI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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5 L# h  |% f, v3 q0 K* `7 ]I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."; f: @* O* s& b1 w, w2 ?: z

8 f6 g  I* A$ I0 U- E, j8 K1 VSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”2 y1 K* b  b" L7 t1 E4 k/ o8 |

( H' Q, u2 r0 V. c0 ^3 |$ K. E4 hThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.5 H: N9 N6 N1 r4 ^0 o
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Thank you very much!8 Q" a5 c: s$ W. F/ g
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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6 ~4 N( a1 Q$ ^& q' C! z4 l" O1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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; W0 t% @) p6 [4 J: E: s) G: S: yRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: : R$ H! P0 R9 q2 l3 h6 l+ i
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。1 J% U% o) m" }% k% ^8 y/ c
怎么理解?
# R  a/ y' m! m2 n; N50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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7 {6 s7 H6 Y# C不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。9 [, q4 a: W5 k' Q7 h+ r
怎么理解?
: `( f6 T6 J- c- ^  x/ S/ \* g50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?- [8 X4 t2 R8 B3 q
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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. @. h" @9 ~* ]0 R% t: `8 a# Y我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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