 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.7 \3 N- I4 y5 i- L" F2 C$ W
/ ?. ?: c1 | L# G: d4 h0 q3 E) P* dI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.. \7 `) E' a8 E' y& x+ @* G4 ]3 V
, n, f$ L p4 b% N: Q/ I( O J s8 iI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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5 m2 u& K6 ^* i p- G1 B4 p2 J"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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) K8 X3 g6 P3 c& E% CI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?$ k( I `4 h1 |/ D4 J
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And the second one was:
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5 d! Y; ^- P" ^# C7 s ^"What's the 2nd Amendment?"9 `$ `. B* _; Y
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?1 L2 @$ I7 j8 y; Y* W2 ~# W
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?". Y1 Y7 [: K5 ]5 `% z' b
% x2 j5 `* f* h1 u; B) OI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?/ }) K. P* B; g7 E0 l1 J
( p$ w, @. ~% }7 n N/ oI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!1 G% G q( j% }- T! R
' d2 G" R4 t% F8 _+ LI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?", m- V* X7 n/ T- v
2 Z' \9 O9 Q8 u: [Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.3 A' O6 J5 q0 ~$ f( W8 R8 G
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:2 q0 C% W( ]" u4 {
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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/ G% V( e1 O/ d2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.% G* Q* F" ^3 W; p! }' S. m
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".6 ^; a- t! B2 O) q
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
