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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe./ E$ |. u. T' T" {- ~
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.; Q) Q% @. |, ~/ h+ [8 Y

  F8 a# R1 ]% P- UI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:4 ?, S" M* Q. {9 N2 F' e" J$ ~

0 U! _# x. @* Q( m/ D- _"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"' E3 s* L+ Z' Z
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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' P0 w( {3 `7 [. q"What's the 2nd Amendment?". C4 B1 K  V, q2 g' R' s

) F: Q' r) R- O: ~4 j% KI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?2 `: Q, P  @: v- L
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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9 g" g' w8 R6 t0 ?7 ^8 AI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?% F: w0 ~5 p* {- |/ a0 Y
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!% t; R- N- U8 G/ g# [+ p
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."3 ]# _, G7 }# `2 b3 j. n+ s

6 {5 r. Q% O4 TSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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# J/ X# n" k; l9 x5 d- {% YThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!1 z9 X) g& N5 i2 k/ n3 b
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) e% ?- \* U+ uImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:- [; ~$ w0 J4 D3 f# B/ f
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.5 Y! {! Y# n- V

& H7 ]8 N8 a% R5 _( [' x2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.6 a  ~8 [2 B& a2 u, C- \) E

5 H) Z' O0 V# Y% W/ X3 m2 L"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.% A7 ~8 d/ H  s) O  ~

& ~1 E' ~1 V7 v- j4 m+ t9 W  \Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".. @) g$ j9 i" K9 V. J

8 \$ o1 {& e1 q9 GRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: - ^" A* g: {& _6 J$ l! o
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
大型搬家
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
3 D3 }5 L' V4 e& w! i* |怎么理解?4 A& B/ ]7 h1 d5 s, i8 R: C
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。$ {: a6 v7 N3 C7 }* J$ _
怎么理解?
# `! `' Q: e+ q+ ^$ @( Q& Y& V' E50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?, l% ^  A7 v/ P1 e
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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8 g5 k* }& ^. e我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳 ' ~" P* g* x0 e9 T

4 w' [9 _# n; j# W/ w我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
大型搬家
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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