 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you. O( B3 b# R: S( P1 I9 @1 e, p
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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8 x7 O2 J# F% n+ }8 ^4 t4 RI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:' |7 U! L& |. S+ J
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"7 m; l- v5 r& B9 ]" e: C
! L7 U' V. B7 K9 U! R4 O9 YI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:) F, C. H, q0 p6 q+ O
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"6 H! w8 L$ O/ A; h" H1 q
: I9 I9 `' u7 h2 {9 hI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"1 R8 j; ?2 N3 ]6 X$ m8 F1 }
# Y5 k1 N2 E& NI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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7 ~* A8 u' B j NI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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- i3 p3 P% Y) gSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"6 ]" V. u1 p3 l* p* M3 k6 |/ Q& T
, \/ b( F/ q) v7 c+ |6 `Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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4 E, J7 q- Y, W# rThank you very much!3 P8 Y+ x& m; a) a2 r
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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: U0 H* n+ ^$ i1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.# y3 q3 Q7 e. f1 V# R/ r
- x5 r$ i; V* O/ s) Y% l7 f& _2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.8 a' z, z7 O4 b4 Q/ X. T0 T
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion. p. j( G/ T* w
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
