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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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. |' _; A1 S3 }; hI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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% I% ~: t+ C5 H5 r) bI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.. I8 J5 C& f  ~, x7 F& z  D
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:) j$ e7 a/ t0 b" v

; y; ^/ h8 @, U' E: k: {"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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# X9 Z0 a' u' c# UI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?; t& U9 ^! |* s! b! y) x4 O3 q. r8 m
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And the second one was:
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1 g( z7 I6 S( o! a"What's the 2nd Amendment?"( L: A1 s: R5 c& j2 b

% Z" w5 c4 J& L9 e2 AI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?7 G7 U  q, S: v: n

% \; R) R0 u: [- g+ f"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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% v  r: z' Z* P  P" eI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?1 O( B) q6 i' K

- h) l, `8 l& H2 L/ G) B! UI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!4 [* m& x" T$ A; |! J4 F. Y
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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$ X2 @3 Z3 M8 W7 o1 U  Y- @So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"1 B: R! C/ \% T* b; q! X
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”! F9 g/ m  ]( e4 e2 B3 Q, p1 X
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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==========================
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% C' J4 _/ z. ~% A) Z! gImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:. j0 b  o9 q" Q6 B6 }+ Q8 P

; P4 F' @6 c1 i2 [1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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" D' s* l  `! a' I% U, a"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.7 A6 {: ]" X4 W: c! v/ ?+ f2 ?
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".  D; i: C0 D2 x+ d% r

" I4 ~! a( M: gRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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8 e7 i' I- p2 m0 w: UThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: ) n: H* f) @9 b# h$ B
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。8 x3 T+ R0 ?* I6 w6 D
怎么理解?
+ e6 c0 U! c- W: Q50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
& R2 v7 u. ^* @; j怎么理解?
  H5 Y- V# t8 N2 e50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?& e- u4 ^! z  w* W. A. F" a- J
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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. b; i6 M$ `2 ?4 O我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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