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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.% D6 `  o7 I4 K  H

$ ?. E) J6 g( N# o4 I* i  gI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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( f" O$ G8 h3 `" ?$ i- O9 vI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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# O/ A1 O8 ^! B3 N# f! z"Who's Benjamin Franklin?", @: U- X# ]; @2 v5 ^2 I! i$ n: D
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?! ]2 ]! i4 ?5 E4 W/ C

* K6 p$ X) O& k9 P6 bAnd the second one was:; p) T4 Q, S; ?( b9 @

5 `& p( |& k$ Y"What's the 2nd Amendment?"% G% g0 R6 V1 [: K6 Y! O- z8 x
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"% e9 p: o2 q; `

' i0 i: ^. t- `0 @$ sI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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; P- W& r8 p5 r" BI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."1 c2 i* I% d5 l) Z- p7 \  C

' V+ E7 Y& h$ M% q& y* h8 |So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?", R9 x4 T$ |7 D$ ]6 F
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!; P# k. |/ D# |9 n. c9 T

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- r4 V% a" B3 [" VImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:  E! m# N% z, f: p

* n, I% Q0 N2 w- l$ ~1 |1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.% K& b% @" i* f
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.- a* a2 W4 M3 C" k) U- z1 ?2 J

; b' \& E# _/ t& U" b! S"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.% T" F$ Z9 |( C" L7 @/ a

* A% k, F" O$ P7 pJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".5 A4 n( F0 Z1 d  V. B7 ]8 f
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
/ z% L: F# |' H- w9 fa young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。  H$ D+ j! ?; H. W8 ~
怎么理解?* |3 ^( X# b$ {
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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* r  e9 g2 a2 E, I, ?. M不离婚,白头到老
大型搬家
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。( L4 {0 t. q4 {
怎么理解?. \9 U* E; w7 O8 E* x2 `
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
4 ?; A" }' z& w* r3 m& y( |cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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, v& A/ K7 z9 z2 Y1 F# K1 q+ ?我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳   T! ?: R6 R# n/ `2 f

' d3 O1 R# ?; F& s我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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