 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.% \6 {( d: f6 X6 v
0 y' i8 \9 I" j) l" c& R$ iI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.' `! l" t$ L) X1 P3 C. _' G* A
) o9 I, x& U. OI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:# X, z, V) F+ j. }4 h K9 D4 L
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"0 c9 x* W. f8 \" [) z- C3 f
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?& E$ T0 t* Z, _7 D9 j1 l) x
6 e1 r8 k# u7 y! H0 ^And the second one was:
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1 {, ?# j5 M* ]) j"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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S) V2 ^2 j3 Q: k; ]) e" z9 vI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?! g+ O% Z0 y8 ]% \4 W
7 n5 S( N. A! a"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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; L5 `8 y9 d# x: l- |. W; ]* BI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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" M8 c; M: ~0 }/ {8 SI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"& k/ e( A: V" u3 b% E6 P4 K
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!) q- T6 @" n/ h1 [0 k
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# S% }1 P1 w, p) d4 _6 S- zImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.& x) D. W) e; O% d0 k
$ Z; ` I; y. k: f, L"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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1 ~4 W: y, E- k P7 c+ U# O w4 KJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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9 |/ W& h5 _# h& O$ L/ oThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
