 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.9 X8 u" ?5 Q1 x W- A5 Q5 e
9 w6 J4 L0 D1 v/ ] ]I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.5 l3 l+ f# _, Y, r; M* d# c; g' Q
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.& i% a7 Q2 @ y2 T- t4 b; @
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:8 d: z: Q D+ x8 H! ?
: J2 f! M* m5 g5 m& }$ q7 @7 h"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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1 `. @2 J) E& N% SI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 P6 E9 w9 S& }% I! ^/ Y& Q7 V8 a" i
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And the second one was:. X- E0 \. R# Z1 b* `% Y% L2 D) Z
; S1 x: N9 h! K/ _# I" b9 H8 z2 j"What's the 2nd Amendment?"& |) Y' g3 H1 R' _7 R
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?" M# L) f. p4 a1 a
# Y7 E/ S5 v6 K! G' S6 }) u"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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( z4 b/ P# Z/ S7 v+ FI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?5 N- z8 Q/ z# j( T" y* k
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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, ]2 m1 A" ~! |- ?- ~" AI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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2 p; F: }4 V+ C" M0 U- T5 f, }So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"& j* I# S2 p' B" j+ u6 B' i1 U* W7 C- l
' z: ^$ L" A- Y: M* W& k& ^Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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. K r, p) u* x, e( YThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore./ c8 r5 H% f6 ?7 Y) h) ~4 z
# z4 z4 b v/ r; q8 f; Y' qThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:7 ~( e& `8 K9 C/ Q
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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; o/ |7 z0 }2 e: {1 S"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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& e: y5 N. w4 T3 }5 PJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".' Y" W, N* S, U6 h& k m
! {( S. `( z/ S; dRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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% L3 b; f. S- M5 w4 j$ D3 `, OThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
