 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.8 P2 T; A* I' l
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.' x+ p, g0 D' R, g% ~. B: W
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:: x0 o) a+ M$ S Y* {: Q1 e" G
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?7 ^& h% T- g+ l
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And the second one was: e/ K" X8 D, ~* _
- X' ^+ `8 \3 P4 R8 e j, n. ^"What's the 2nd Amendment?"9 z- D' K/ W w# c, `5 C
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?6 P- i) d* C1 W1 z& M2 ]1 V
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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5 e& R/ G( a1 {; {8 a: a$ |I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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" Z: \; g. `" U+ R/ h! H9 xI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen.". r1 F0 e- _! p0 v1 o- C$ m
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"6 G+ m/ x/ I& d$ _
4 c8 `) r' w- {( \3 ]Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.7 {7 t: E# E: L. v% f: Y3 {$ T
) I( z S& h. a9 i0 v. vThank you very much!3 K5 A" h) R' @8 Y7 f
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:# x( t8 h2 h$ p/ M' ~- E
' R' M: r% j( |7 {: D5 _8 g3 r1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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0 z! g& ]& f3 k2 c: B2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.' h; N3 W# Y1 w- W0 d, s* D: K
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.0 U% u, x& _' ~' x, |6 o
7 s6 S5 S& H3 m9 ~% P; c8 L t: |" PJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.8 ^& _8 G7 a, E4 X; |
8 j0 W4 q( i( }1 N" gThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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