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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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3 ^$ a. i& {$ e$ v% DI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.( G0 V5 E, m* E9 m2 @/ m7 e/ I$ M
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 f+ U! R& p  _) n" ~
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"0 N, l) D* E- e: p+ X+ Z

# O' [! f, O7 B% o1 A& e( HI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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& H) e) A) S3 U- z. ?7 j"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ r" R. m, B' |/ `' T, e- Y

/ E4 i  C7 a3 E; _2 F"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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% b! |& Q3 G' vI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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# G( t4 p% i  G. W- OI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."0 J3 X* @( F( T2 H& Q9 C# w
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"1 S/ S- @9 n2 x/ {; ^6 [6 b+ v

4 _9 D8 s4 w% ?# eNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”8 t) S- T7 o6 p

% F( z& x) N! @, X) E8 R- BThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.' L4 D5 L0 v. k& V, _
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Thank you very much!
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& j$ }6 |. W5 K; i. }Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:; P% l( C4 P3 b7 s  b# g
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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5 P" f, Q% Y7 |) u2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.0 O2 d& W" z! N* o7 r) K* R

  W5 u! L2 J8 M7 [3 |# M"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.5 b% l% s0 Z( F0 t6 k+ _9 m5 j

5 ]  J3 V8 [* n% S0 SJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".  f5 d/ P' Q+ Q+ P, ?$ T
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.5 A$ m# K3 I8 F6 Z0 i1 ?% ?
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
. o) C: [& d1 A3 K( M! ja young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。7 A5 _. U/ W  d& w0 ]" `5 ~" }; t
怎么理解?
( I+ Z  e! v. Y7 l: O  O50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。; ^) G* ~6 c. z% z: q  j
怎么理解?
0 L$ A9 U) O3 L1 V2 r- W50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
5 w# h- e3 Q- o3 b/ @8 M+ R1 \cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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