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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.! _# j5 ]0 G# D" `3 S0 a

) p+ O6 K9 g% C* eI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:; R/ S8 t! ]2 \, ?. ]
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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- C- b# @7 ~/ n* EI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?+ B2 j6 |$ C0 K/ t, M6 _
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"% N; ?' X5 s* G3 \3 r! v

: l' p6 K# f  ~: h7 r' C8 |. ?8 HI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?! x0 d8 C& |* g4 h

) j; k3 G( K9 q+ K- W2 e4 Q5 E( u"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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4 z$ x9 {8 W5 B; T7 BI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!: \% d* V" r/ w0 r" @8 X/ f) @

; m2 H& e0 n+ q1 L" k1 mI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."9 o4 }1 R+ J  F. h( I5 x
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"0 c2 P# @- M% E- y! J' S

2 Y3 F! H* U5 H  N" w1 T1 N; CNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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+ x/ t0 g! y: o. `! dThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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9 e' n! s; u+ H$ Q; ]0 sImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill., X: w! z( d0 k' f' q% e: O& H: c$ C
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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' }, W4 G" r. x) H( d"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion./ _$ @' Q% u2 p% L$ h# S. S, Z* q  b
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".7 @: a. r' @8 X

# ^- X1 H; K/ k' P5 c9 IRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.2 |( q8 X' v; w. c
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
- H4 p0 m, ]) A; l$ Z3 O* D' D, wa young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。2 L& [2 K! E; l) x' j6 {
怎么理解?7 a* A2 v( s8 y2 L  p
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。7 A4 \& x! Z5 [. K6 q
怎么理解?
/ {5 O+ ~- V/ b' z50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?2 k  e) N# ]; s( R5 P- e
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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: E* a6 y$ k, o2 i我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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