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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.$ O: G1 m" u  G
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.4 h" v3 X: }  J

0 L& d( y( u$ P4 Z% {' X; Z+ CI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.4 X; v! R0 I( m+ v* ~* x
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:, x  @, K' f- t) c; x& s+ k$ G. L

$ ~( A6 L4 d5 T$ ~5 o# |"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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) g  A/ ^8 u+ c8 G' A# B9 R( F! I; nI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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1 y/ T1 o+ P7 j; K, f5 _  @+ c+ Z. B, h"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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* q( D0 B0 l7 W0 m; ]  h"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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2 C" H+ z: C; K3 {& b6 e6 gI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?0 a* J. u8 @+ L- ^' R! F+ V' U- ]

3 Q* g: e6 g3 z6 O4 z) }; BI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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% {, C. w& F+ ^; sI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."% Y: A0 _, A: w7 l5 P8 ~

- M8 d  E. m) }% b+ N+ bSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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- q$ t8 _+ [2 f" @7 X0 v; kNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”$ w4 X. t  F% \8 \

5 @* j3 |$ J& ^8 c; z9 T9 qThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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+ W$ I6 m- J# n5 A4 t' _Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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0 Y' n4 ]1 s5 S/ H, i8 i1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.4 w$ g  B, Z/ y9 M$ T0 L; U

! z3 @: m3 l( S"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.: H/ O/ ]: {. f9 J# E; G5 K9 v
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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. s, Y! n6 |' h* Y, x( PRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: . `$ z0 F. ?) f$ z9 z
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
7 D: v" D  m$ ~怎么理解?/ Z. g' i* Q3 W$ X9 C4 Z5 |1 ], e
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。% Z7 e+ g" v( x% @& p
怎么理解?
# t5 L8 G, H" x: @7 R- L! u( T50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?& N  r# U4 a" ]1 Y. }
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
大型搬家
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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