 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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8 K* z7 ]( _+ {+ R& TI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years." T& C/ ] U" t3 }& k# m
" O1 ?" o% @6 p' wI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:; f7 i& n/ D) C
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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& T/ b @6 p9 q/ m' I. c5 i* sI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 J; L7 l5 j7 A$ c6 q: ` @
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And the second one was:! i' m9 B0 E& ]1 E, U: k! n( j7 n
7 q i/ N5 V2 _2 x! P' B"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?$ m- C0 s1 m# \# X
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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9 f5 n, J* h4 H2 xI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen.": k. M4 t$ [$ ^5 y, ^. B+ `
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?", u+ b) E+ R: ?9 J5 z) f
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”4 H3 @# u t9 E* o+ H9 r1 e7 L+ H
6 g" |& D4 a) \' h! PThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore./ g( j; Y. g7 S) ?9 M, P
. P* `: M2 D; m5 D* RThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:$ I9 k+ n6 T' G# ?
, A% [' D) u8 q) m8 S1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion. h% T a$ K& r- H
( A" G, y9 ^$ y4 C vJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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3 p9 u4 ^5 \2 V. ^" }Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US., k n" |( }! @! `) `5 E
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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