 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe." g5 V( z/ k* [; h
4 k" A; t" y! u3 i4 {1 l6 H. rI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.3 p: i& ?- A* O+ i; |9 S- J( ~
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.& c: s; _% h; Y" s/ `8 v, J2 @
: s- B: T5 y* B& e. M( l6 oI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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5 G9 [% ^" O0 r; ?9 jI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:7 Z3 g) E4 J: y4 E
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"9 `6 E c# a- V) T6 |
/ W. |) U! M% v: WI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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+ ^6 b0 ?) S# i: ?4 {2 L"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?4 W% `; z2 r, H5 h
, L0 H" d6 N' p- \I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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8 A0 A$ h S/ d4 \/ b% B& B: ]So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"; `/ B" y2 O. R. }
S1 V% T0 Y+ pNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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0 A8 T1 o7 {+ P5 i, b8 ZThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.& D/ S P8 O8 @. A( m- b( K
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Thank you very much!
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3 }( H: _0 q0 |2 WImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.# `- e; ~" u* a# e$ \* v
, x# C- o6 a; Q# n% D& O4 L* j+ q2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.! t( C" P- E5 m- P* D
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.* D% s4 w! o, J1 j# {& s
) a3 M2 H# ?5 V/ } P6 {Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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2 _: A S2 O, }1 g4 ARoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.+ b( y; N1 J3 h- Z' D
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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