 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.6 y4 s4 [9 {0 s4 N2 l2 w
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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7 L5 K, C5 N' l- U2 ~; RI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.; M8 P8 U# Z2 [8 M- l0 t0 g+ n r
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 A1 z. @1 P+ I; F0 ^ M
6 y" B3 j2 }- c"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"4 |5 B& M5 _# W O; L2 m
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?- z) n: T `4 S
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"# t2 F1 H; g' s S' A0 q
7 P! ]: F$ p$ J% @8 {2 [& K% H! d! dI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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# v M( Y. c7 f6 e' e7 s: [; FI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!' R( g3 d* _4 _4 e2 H! u/ [
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!% v, S+ ?( K/ p# k' p" x
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+ G" Q. F6 B' U: j! RImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:; Q: o& |. r% b' {
' Y4 E/ y3 E$ [- S$ \2 z+ ?1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.0 q1 U( N2 t& f4 X7 w
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms." V8 ~( ~2 B- l5 s- e
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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4 l: a: s: @# k) i# cJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.% H- s* B: J9 a
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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