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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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- L" R2 A' {! S% x& SI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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- p: I# i4 g9 q+ pI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:; H! Q( c' N7 C5 P+ S' ^7 F
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"5 Y1 c; r& D) r' [
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?! S# Y' e, C5 D6 N6 Z

( L) l% ^! ?1 u6 yAnd the second one was:6 d( D: C2 i2 K  z$ B
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"+ z$ B* G5 [9 p
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?( o8 D9 j" w# |! M

- B9 i1 }; W$ r9 C1 v* J' C; _1 u- o3 CI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!8 j: ~/ X+ ]8 `3 _
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."% K4 {' J) S( {. I
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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7 Z0 E/ ^+ \  `* Y1 t, FNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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* m. }# k2 J  lThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.4 L' R  o1 o; `0 m# y! M
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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& E. \+ q2 m1 }( c6 l( p) v1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.3 N" ?2 P( N5 o9 \" @9 }* w3 F! Z, e
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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( ?1 Y$ ^4 ]" Z, S"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.' y" Y- N6 ]) h

+ @7 F- B/ V% l4 k4 yJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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# l8 P& H! }" r# eRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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! s: p+ i1 `1 \0 Y* a$ b2 {6 UThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: ; E( N6 N: \9 I2 m1 h3 }  X' z
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
& @; \8 N7 }0 G怎么理解?6 E( B/ k5 K0 s3 n. n4 K" T
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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. N' @9 x8 ]' h! V* Y2 V不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。3 o7 v, t7 s6 R1 S: s
怎么理解?
: E" p7 y- B- l50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
, s3 O6 s& o( [2 C$ s2 j, Jcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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  i5 Q% F" K. V; D$ T我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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