 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.* M- ^: B0 Y+ [. N
' Y" f/ p4 J1 v: t5 ~: S. V) kI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.0 ~9 G) Y- @$ Q; o( H
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:1 J4 A7 b; {* m% K4 |5 ^! \
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"; b' O" l# `' U2 ~ o# F c1 `
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:: n: D* @+ T) a ~$ r
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"1 M. ?; `: @* P% z- P
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?& d& U9 d: U- R2 p$ M1 W" ~
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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+ d1 L- R" D A4 U) R7 r% r0 b4 O8 W8 R2 RI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?! f l! H9 G, e) t& ~
* L4 V' K' t. N+ t tI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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7 R' F# y% B9 g5 O( tI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."$ l5 \' Y( \. |$ |2 K- f! [
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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# [. s7 G. J' e6 l: Z; iThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.8 c3 M+ t4 M) a6 z1 _7 ^
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Thank you very much!+ P9 M t( k2 g5 u
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$ k I/ y( N& m: r! x1 h+ O& s9 VImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1 z) Y8 x+ V w' P& r+ |1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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7 C. y; t- f- W' v: ]3 f2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.# W$ ]3 P- a7 B9 M
' V2 c9 J7 s+ V0 O, R3 mJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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4 M+ Z, t3 }) U6 bRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.8 j# m6 z2 p" H* I) P
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
