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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.1 I) D! N6 }: Z' f4 k& R
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.4 I5 X& z# z7 Y# A( O9 `
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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' K' ^6 q. l! Z7 |"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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* V8 n& C: m" ~) LI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 J3 ], V8 z6 p- P

2 Y! x8 d$ R" k9 W1 I) P" qAnd the second one was:: ]: l9 N: u- a

3 y# j( V  |# `' V8 a; L"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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. @  O1 P0 H3 D) _. @! NI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?0 K/ g1 G/ Z. u+ H8 S4 v

' O" \" l$ F& c$ W5 i* m! d3 wI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."1 Z3 G% t. |# S

" m9 {8 Y; `( SSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"# a# C2 k. I& S8 D$ k
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”8 s5 S4 R2 a/ P7 D& v. \2 A
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.2 J& z) ^9 Y% s- _+ A. m: [9 [7 ]. p& G
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Thank you very much!
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2 O. s9 X7 Z( t) s% UImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.' {/ r0 C  ], C& {! k5 m4 y
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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% `( x, M6 C, b  A7 u" M5 x, U"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.# D( m3 ]7 l9 G8 @9 r" q

) x0 F1 ]4 Y0 A; Q8 z, WJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".- U! C- m( W4 O$ N& |( C
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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$ O! X" ^+ H* O: D5 AThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
8 q% p5 R- Z, T, J) M, Ta young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
4 f4 i( n$ e8 Q. j6 E- z怎么理解?
$ i5 l( Z, n9 X50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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* Z' g3 `- J3 L不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
4 m0 \6 z) ~/ j2 v怎么理解?* e0 u% {0 o3 |* Q1 N
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?( K& ^# l- j1 U0 D0 P6 x
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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( W, x3 f" {9 D0 }$ [5 N* x( K我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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