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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house( o+ a4 g g/ ^8 K3 |6 L4 q
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
; |' q! e7 W9 X/ S. g$ aShe wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
2 P, y: r: {/ ACause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.5 R S! _9 J7 i& o+ ?
He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.1 e* o; {7 d V4 _
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.* w P+ W6 g& K- J
He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
6 |1 J; j* R- Z/ ?+ p& ?With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.4 s; M: W$ d& Y& `4 [* Q9 B( u. T. w
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
# b$ D3 X; F7 c+ K& \- ~7 ]: l' t2 HTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.. s0 `5 t0 l2 W3 a
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
8 o4 n# s* L/ e6 O. Y5 V* S& qWhen not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
8 l1 ^' [4 s$ N8 z7 R3 A! o ZDespite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
3 D4 Q9 ^" s. @6 zTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .
# V' f" G2 l" X4 {* r( _; SAnd I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
( C' P$ z' W1 J- k, f. u H) v+ J"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
7 D* f+ V5 T) I' fShe’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
8 [) k. l, K( U! L6 C* a% A! PHer prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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