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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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' i# |6 B P2 c h/ c& T$ G1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush. {5 v. d$ Q; \# B) m0 {$ Q* k9 V8 a
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday A0 H; T- j3 N
morning.7 @3 |& D U9 N9 \2 c1 w0 |) ~
( q6 A1 m& z- g. a3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,6 |4 j# z! ~; u6 r3 R( o6 S
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a1 \. o# p, c' w4 E8 j# v4 s- t4 r9 x
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'." _0 D z r" s+ B
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its L3 W, x( a3 }. E5 f
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest2 [) J) e+ U- l2 x
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
Z1 f0 ~' O2 O/ Ggo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell& a9 j% _9 n. E6 n4 b; ~! L
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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8 k4 {- R' K8 `& [2 a( q5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
- S. d6 n$ {, @' w) g4 T- m* J8 Dcussed out, and possibly shot.
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# P' w; ]9 y5 [6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can3 @2 ^) {' V1 ^4 @- @7 W( i; y
get you shot.
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9 b0 N' ? f) i# @7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that8 ~" N3 t+ s% c z' k
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at1 d" e7 ^0 w7 U; L2 a- x- L! `4 @
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot `+ i4 Q2 N' g5 w
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
& s6 B) d% e6 ^: k' [7 yvehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour8 x/ @- |' j O2 o& K
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next9 C) y5 [- h% k" k
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
/ q; j" l: L& ^more construction starts everyday.
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; q; [5 Z o: c% D' u9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
0 s' h% w+ g; w+ cdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
8 ~) @ ^8 {% `: H, esquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
- R. C: f! V g4 @ E. iroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye- D6 `, _# T- ?5 X. b
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
/ j0 w( V/ H- v9 ]+ G66 Street are also the same road; got it?. D5 R- \6 |2 }! o( ]# |7 t
+ u3 Q, V7 k4 q5 |% u% l5 B11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the+ L" c5 J/ O& ~3 I& o. n, z
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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* m. y) Z3 h7 h/ X8 a7 L12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,+ Q- B4 Z2 L9 E+ P! o1 _
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
* B& b, d! r' |, K. ]accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
* Z6 h4 J7 q) u% Q# |& t2 ]lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
9 W% m j, m+ Ablankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
