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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
! {, t3 {) w1 x" ^6 I请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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% n% b3 g% w3 ]* q1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
; ]/ ~6 v  j" g8 u0 W+ w3 U1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫, Q3 Y* C) R( U6 c6 @3 g7 w

: c% X. {; v, A' O/ W* R2 k) n1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it: S- }. [* x, K$ J$ J
down.
% Y/ T/ f$ Y4 iWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
: w, m3 c; P4 h* k: U/ [you
+ F. Z) ~1 b9 R  _; G# z$ g9 k7 hleaving it down.$ n: ~7 j  E# `
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?
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* y+ q( s2 V, S  n+ |3 d- }1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.! D8 F  n) t" _! W" h
Let it be.
1 H( l" b$ t# h( e1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it2 w0 |8 G& [7 t9 P! C
that way.
  E6 _! |# C9 |! X& p5 t+ L$ W/ E/ ~1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!: a! ]" ?. _: s3 N: d' P

. J) Y) ?- _6 A+ }1. Crying is blackmail., r9 {9 k  Q+ i
1,哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want., Q# o/ z# ?5 t4 w
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!7 o7 Z3 `" R& j
Strong hints do not work!
2 j) t% {" i+ G$ YObvious hints do not work!
8 @0 ^3 R: \1 X& h$ u6 VJust say it!
0 a* [, P3 @2 x5 Y; r: ~4 n1,你想要什么就说5 z5 ~5 R9 N& L$ u1 m  m8 e
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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4 D: b% q5 N) r3 ?1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every + ]3 B+ k4 _1 V' m
question.% x- [4 `6 E1 s" f! w. y
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)7 Q- V4 G) G- b8 R
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's
+ v2 O+ q/ r+ [; \: J& G0 V, jwhat we do.
+ R1 l+ R/ a* U! l- n6 f$ ZSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.2 H* i" h3 p" m1 |( Y- r3 g& s
1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。) C1 W/ Q6 C: P

6 D/ p: @- Z  x; d3 O1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.: N. X5 d" U8 g) p( U0 l
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去  D! ]2 v' U  E
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.0 M8 g! g' z# P5 M
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
' h2 P0 p. O0 V8 b我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us! b4 g7 h/ d( E- |4 D0 b* I
to act like soap opera guys.
) u$ |, l0 O; Q8 b1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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- k3 Q$ g/ q1 g5 V3 }' F1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us." X; g) y$ R# \5 E1 N/ w
1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们* H( w4 F, N3 l9 p$ U
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
: c3 V  E' ?5 t, |2 Amakes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.
  B, K+ B  j. F  S- x1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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. c! e$ d- o: ^- a2 D0 l- E+ b(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)
) i3 P$ B' ?6 O' t8 ?( s1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
# k" j; H- v7 G* rdone. Not both.0 ]7 o+ H5 N6 u" W! I6 x
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself., u6 [. [7 A, c; h# ~6 q# [
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during( S9 M2 R/ k, E
commercials." u' u/ N% @% K+ ]. L' y+ P. Y3 }# b
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.6 b) W6 N- ^" `5 \+ V1 c: N
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.6 J' m& \1 F! f# c: U
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
$ X: Z' [/ @" l+ R  uWe have no idea what mauve is./ ?6 l( m. h5 U) ~8 `0 y
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.* m% z: M! j+ D0 P  ?0 X
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like& v; e& E- r  K0 b5 Q# {
nothing's wrong.6 |1 j! ]: d8 j$ Z8 y  [  H5 L
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer' ^0 o) _& t( g+ a# I
you don't want to hear.( w: T" Z9 m: F3 g

% x9 K, u& r% p# X- D1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is- h% R7 y  P7 Z
fine...Really.$ C1 Q9 g# l( D! u5 Z: ~# B  L

, ]. |. ?: }+ i$ o2 }1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to, N+ d2 k: {5 n4 c) o+ [
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.3 m( t' |- I% C+ P1 @

9 T( q8 }5 J& Y1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!9 @4 b# N. t; Z  y1 E
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1. Thank you for reading this.% u1 }$ m. A: H- [$ X
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;9 d$ J" m8 d( \" o
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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: |1 x  ^8 x! L$ @$ H/ dPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
5 h! T" X+ N7 jPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。+ s, p/ D7 z# N* m( i  T/ i/ L$ g' e9 w8 I
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! Q4 f3 i9 C5 t+ i1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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' C+ [5 A6 S. H' ]6 S2 b/ y1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
& [0 D- ^9 V% Q+ I" k我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!$ x4 e$ y# `3 f# [, Y- f3 j% m

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2 d3 k. _% p0 u* ?9 j1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.) p" n: t$ E" d& g3 i! d9 \
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。4 p; J) q7 k: t- q# K' G

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# K" b) k+ y' y  x9 a. Y3 ]1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that." j( ~5 d3 V, j# |& }* g
如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。
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  K9 V. |/ K( W# B8 D1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
3 Z4 w/ ~! C% d+ `" G- W% [如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。
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2 M3 m8 T' o3 q. o5 M! }" O1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.
8 Y0 Q+ v% Y2 s3 t% _# Z7 r. J如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:- X/ D: R! P- S; a, ^) B7 [0 z
ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
$ Z% M9 q0 K# c* C  _所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置. T; o  Z  k1 i

5 i2 o1 U; s4 K5 I8 V8 i3 B还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.) P9 r4 J5 I8 r5 O5 f0 R2 f
如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
1 u. r8 k( ]8 u5 {不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。
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1. You have enough clothes.
# W) R8 ?& r0 v9 c你的衣服足够多了, A8 T& e  g( r

( A8 d0 i; V# k# k0 }4 g1 a0 m' D1. You have too many shoes.* J0 C6 e, x2 T# ^6 E! u
你的鞋子也太多了吧+ q9 B! A+ z8 W4 |) Q$ N& w

0 X; }9 s$ [- i# R  a1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!7 u- d3 E. }/ w4 m$ L
我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?4 g# B- Q* b, I: A5 j2 p; I7 V

9 J0 ]5 i1 c9 C* d# c5 x1. Thank you for reading this.
" D' F+ ?2 ^9 l多谢你能看完这个
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.1 B  j% P5 y3 `! ^
我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:
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* L8 Q" n7 s2 b0 i$ h# ?& T+ X这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置! \5 o( ]: B+ t# z& |: ~) G; K
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
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, U$ r* d! Q! K' v1 ^/ u0 s0 R5 K应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿
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( L5 F( `* w1 V* {4 }/ ~玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:
+ E0 y9 d% Z4 Z: x! n0 ~# ^1. You have enough clothes.
+ d( u5 {' Q6 z你的衣服足够多了
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. T+ Y5 i1 W* K1 X3 E+ S1. You have too many shoes.. H9 h6 B& v; ^! m0 D: N1 S5 r
你的鞋子也太多了吧
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这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want." s$ r0 r3 d6 K" {8 v" [' n+ L
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!$ O+ ?. E3 f. V6 {
Strong hints do not work!6 c. S$ e" f9 _. S3 B) V
Obvious hints do not work!
" l1 d* K7 ?( H4 \Just say it!$ o. X2 i" J+ O
1,你想要什么就说
& T6 N& ~6 L- z* B. d7 a* v  K我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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1 j& t! B$ |2 t. v! V关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:
, k) A$ I2 `4 I4 V) G  w1 k1. Ask for what you want.
+ E; J- X0 `: q  U" ?Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
: z. ?% @, g  B$ c' T: ?4 R6 fStrong hints do not work!+ Z9 x" E1 V4 G0 U- k% M8 r5 R
Obvious hints do not work!
) y4 t5 a" m( gJust say it!
5 I- u- u! _* |- I  ^- |1 [1,你想要什么就说: D2 d9 m/ m: y% W, a
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...

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瓦赛
大型搬家
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
! U7 n& ^2 P9 [( K% d3 ?被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿! i0 |+ m; q4 E& z

0 j* H% T: l9 T9 dhttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:
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; g, t* x$ Z' @( P! u& ]' O5 V咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1

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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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9 @+ a6 n0 m: r/ R还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:& }! p% f! j1 X8 \9 Y/ k; p) @

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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。4 i  s5 R2 t" J' Q- l3 M% j9 ?  o
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还想问问你的体会呢!
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体会?" N' o$ D# ]: x

* U- f7 L" f0 m" P1 [: \: ~回答到那个帖子下面了
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