In the garden of my heart

Dawson

听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！

1 Z' M1 N1 _; M% _In the garden of my heart
You planted a tree
8 p8 U8 N3 R$ c+ vFrom sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
Nourished with my soul
8 x; a9 e. w/ u6 pDevoured my sorrow by thee

In the memory of my life
& D) E: s: u. |  J& n8 tYou planted a dream
Should the sky fall down on me
7 R: w2 E4 x* ~' gMay promises fade in the sea
0 H- f. X8 x/ z! x* s: c9 R9 @Sewing back every broken pieces
2 b# a( A( j. o& E# w% b3 h8 mBursting the love out of me

3 K3 R: `7 R8 i" S- N$ l2 Q[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]

云山水月

原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！
. g/ I, ?2 x' Z$ N# f& `
In the garden of my heart
$ I1 K5 _0 h1 a+ D3 Y* U3 wYou planted a tree
From sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
Nourished with my soul
# a: d( z; Y2 RDevoured my so ...

6 Q0 t0 F2 V* k+ L  t
4 I- n9 n4 b2 ~9 V/ F8 n眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？

写得真好。
. w! d8 w  |" O9 M; f+ L) L
加精加精！

Greatwall

哥们儿，你没喝多吧？没事就过来烧烟啊！

九月

汗！居然有２单词不认识。：（

Justing

原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？
$ _& d* _8 B6 Z, p1 {写得真好。
6 I( J( r5 h) f* w6 A6 T$ y加精加精！

我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗

五月

如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

微澜

原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

五月JJ这个意境，想想实在是罗曼蒂克，不过在爱屯，海天相接是没有了，只有在湖畔雪山了：）

朱顺顺

Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.

) V9 ]9 @% f& E/ v& C% q# f; D8 `) O0 dSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

Dawson

原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
! d: c+ p2 P2 N! z) X: e
0 o, ~# C3 O3 C3 ?) YSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

Thanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.
) {$ E! E! Q+ c3 f
( z+ w) b7 `3 [8 R) T2 H' t4 y; X1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".

2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.

月光宝盒

红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民，但很喜气！很有乐在其中的意境啊！

FCUK

thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

五月

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

, d$ e& p/ ]) [% q2 M/ C/ Z/ Q4 Z
诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.

Dawson

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
& c5 U: h" X+ P1 ?. b
. X; F& A2 _, b8 E$ X* e. NShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

( n* C2 f5 x' L  o3 }' e) h5 d
有啊，有很多经典的例子。

+ B( ^4 R' D" ~5 E比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》
- N* T# p" |1 a+ v/ N/ d# W+ V2 N' u
) I1 W2 q. R: U% o/ P# |- B* pDon't weep at my grave
For I am not there,
I've a date with a butterfly
To dance on the air.
* y  A0 F" A9 E. ZIf I'm missed, find a flower,
I'll be there too,
Sniffing it's fragrance
( d, M; i  P" \5 e) y8 ARight next to you.

# t* T. Z( f: s2 ADon't be sad
! E- D$ l7 ~6 i$ u# _9 ?When you remember me,
For I'm singing in the sunshine,
Wild and free,
Flirting with the lighting,
* y0 |( Y6 p. }$ c$ F9 W) HPlaying tag with the wind,
' W( Y- Z+ d$ U3 h- \Chasing the thunder
" l9 Z( T$ @2 g# v( T4 d% M6 YTime and again,
2 g7 v# T  J" k- J; `0 ^Soaring with the eagle,
Swimming in the sea,
Enjoying all of nature
- q; E, s2 p: @: K: |7 {: qWhile I'm waiting for thee.