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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA8 |8 b1 W5 R: ]. a, @# ?: ^5 m
# P0 Q) {3 K9 S1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. , P4 [6 F0 i8 i0 ^0 Y8 i
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. * ]; Z. e+ t& n- U8 @( t
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. " m6 U6 d0 h/ |% d m
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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: R3 q& r3 H' z# yTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA 6 i* f& z' ]* D) R! G
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
' f3 d- J/ u: N' A4 @. P k; m: d2. Ottawa who?
$ A. h9 ]; v0 Y, V0 [" G3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
+ U) {4 q, P- L% Y& C% q( a9 [3 {4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. 1 m; f2 m9 H5 ]
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. S" L( l; F2 t$ Q9 a( x
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. # j4 y" B( D" h5 r0 z2 b7 g
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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' s+ }7 h+ M3 z1. You never run out of wheat. & W1 [; Z5 H4 O- p2 w9 K
2. Your province is really easy to draw. / G7 Z# P6 s4 G. J) F$ K( l8 \
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
u' p/ }: U9 }$ L4 O" D4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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]8 `- u5 R* K' o7 d UTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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: x# n6 `2 H$ J [" Z" B. C1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
6 e3 r# @9 d- Z' f/ n+ ~9 Z4 \2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. ( B! C# B' c, A
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. ; G% {3 \+ _$ M
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 7 L8 @- r$ c* B0 P5 W
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO / K+ N/ d; I$ P! z1 D* p
/ S' X1 l) a* J/ K1 v" r5 H1. You live in the centre of the universe.
! D4 b& H4 y, N: y4 \/ @' i9 ^- Z& o6 O2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
, @$ Q& s5 ]: r7 v' K$ h7 p7 z3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
4 `! J2 W/ ~* Z* E4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. 5 i- }( J r8 ]" m5 I% [5 Y
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O7 U+ {7 f9 l+ K% \: x+ JTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC % _3 i+ }% w/ z0 z9 a
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1. Racism is socially acceptable 2 A Q" z6 n; {7 z; I6 F& ?, Z% N
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. 1 O/ h r7 w4 k' h$ ?0 Y# `
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. " g: I" [# }$ r% L; ^
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo * S8 G# u( f. h
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 6 i& y& E, r7 s; `
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
: Q) B I/ T5 S. U* W- a3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
0 n; l5 U: e" t+ W2 i6 @4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. & j/ C6 }% O8 s Y4 @0 U& @
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8 Z. G k1 O# l0 u. HTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. 4 d1 F7 w7 O; S2 e
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. 3 G) E! U5 ]6 \2 Z1 ?
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. # P, j7 T! f6 ?1 y
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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! J' w5 C8 i" M( [' B u6 F1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
[5 R5 u7 B; I$ g9 Q- l2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. % v6 e* B' g- A- u0 K! N
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
4 p, z, P# G. N9 R0 d( Q3 w1 m4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
+ s# D7 A; r9 w# I, m+ W5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
+ @/ K. d' a2 W/ l4 }" |6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND , u3 ?4 s7 o; Q) `% F
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. 9 h# I$ N" {8 L- z) l
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
9 F- n5 W$ Z6 @6 C* `1 F3. The workday is about two hours long. 5 G- L9 j! i* o7 Q0 i8 ?' T
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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