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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA. O0 L( ]6 T3 x2 H
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 0 f8 M0 P) f" d
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
/ h9 x" _4 w- @3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. 8 k6 J9 A- V) X2 [
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. ; g6 W( Q0 ]0 t4 b
5. Weed
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA 1 K9 m0 F/ @9 A
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. % U7 C, U( n3 x( H
2. Ottawa who?; H6 |0 A1 \, n; q+ S4 @8 A U
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
7 I' c7 b. {& S* [5 Z6 |. G, a6 ^4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
2 q/ T" K6 A; j/ w# z5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. 8 ?; a2 D4 A$ n! l+ R! y
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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) Q/ k9 X* A P* rTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN 5 l6 Z. u( z. m# ~' a0 a
% P/ T8 w, u9 p) T( r, ] n9 `0 t1. You never run out of wheat. 5 M. U% C/ p5 g3 D
2. Your province is really easy to draw. 2 K" R' L* e: j
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. ! T' S; f) f& x8 p
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. H5 n, ~7 ~* ~2 K4 j; M7 \
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
" Q. @/ Q e5 Z" B3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. % t0 K1 Z' [# a, z( _# o4 y
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. ) U9 q ~- A x0 Z
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
" r( G- K+ p Y( K! l; s2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
+ @3 Q \0 v% g6 H8 d1 ?" y: z, `7 S3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
6 H+ [2 Q& Q. z6 w4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC ( w* F/ C# Q6 k7 H4 ?
W2 Q: _9 ?7 I( K- {1. Racism is socially acceptable
" \2 J7 @1 ]2 H3 d1 r% G# v1 ]2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
1 K" B9 o1 G. i0 x0 J$ n$ ^- U3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. * ]; Y6 i4 V. v
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
7 h' K/ \, i) y- @TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 0 b# E: R2 r( a3 X. R' K
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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2 J6 S7 l* j ~4 u: ?1 e1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 6 `5 f( x2 c7 N
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
# N( T5 S. w" i2 z3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick E5 s; A4 @& O5 z, v, ?0 S- [9 `& N
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. 5 U: D7 ]: ] a$ Q1 U( [9 D
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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5 v1 W& | K5 `- t% d$ P1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. / N* e2 r* |$ W$ V8 e
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. $ ~+ @! Y1 l* m+ D0 z2 @6 Y
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. * W# j2 u& A# p, C6 P, t5 y$ \( y
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. , B0 H8 Y: Y' b
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. : o& ?- b/ A4 X# `6 e
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." 8 m9 R) O5 e3 x' j- b& \5 J% R
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
3 ?7 ?+ {: {1 ?1 R: g7 W3 @6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. : E8 D, W/ k& Q; H' j
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, s6 Q2 e1 Q' @# L/ D7 O9 LTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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: b& ]' P9 d% U: P' U5 B1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. ' P u4 _6 n& p, Z
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
2 `* s7 x+ h% b& P) ~3. The workday is about two hours long.
& R: m; ?4 j* A/ h4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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