 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.' @0 s' C4 d i1 {, j" F
2. Mostly to clean the house.
! ?6 `& f1 E6 S' e% M3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. % f, |0 G* O) d" C9 A. A
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How did God make mothers?
R2 M* o5 P8 e9 R: N# e1 d9 R1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.& {3 X0 [' z! H8 i& _
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
, p- ~5 i% a) R5 y3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. - K8 n2 p3 O3 W
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
6 \, W2 k. P3 Y- W+ c+ e1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
4 A) t( j9 q7 E( z0 B2 P: L; g6 K2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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: Y7 n5 U5 |) _2 m- j: i' @Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 2 q. B7 r5 u! [5 Q* T: _; L
1. We're related.
, m& b7 T6 |" Y: h0 X6 M% D2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 1 a8 T5 n; L! Y5 O9 ^
' M. P5 u& C, N/ \6 jWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
" f8 ~: B1 H3 u. U8 `1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
+ P! J# q6 R) a2 q9 g1 d8 z2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
9 Y4 P1 o8 H: x% b! Y7 k3. They say she used to be nice. ' s( b9 s3 Q# p% Q, D1 N
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
4 m% A6 g3 a* ?- F1. His last name.
- D3 [& `' F( j3 O* m2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
( O: {/ B1 {# ^' R/ m; _/ U# m3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? # [: Z+ V3 x _6 _! S
* i; b$ d* L/ M/ PWhy did your mom marry your dad?
( ]* F% Z0 {/ a& K8 s" K1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
9 I0 m/ a5 ~0 u2 a6 I( q3 {8 E& t2. She got too old to do anything else with him. & `* D u7 Y" i0 T7 S. C: s
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? & n5 w* f& m# k) B& Q% A
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. # s4 O0 J5 O! T
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
' W, O/ h1 v1 N* Q$ G3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. ; x4 }6 s7 ~0 Q2 @; @( x
1 `) d1 q! c3 `+ J* y- i7 KWhat's the difference between moms & dads? 5 W* a8 U3 }& [, c! R" D
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
, H! I4 o/ F! I u5 T2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.& o9 j" R" `' [2 I! Y2 L% s; ^8 ~
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
' O- n/ a; w* }( l" r9 ?* Y& y ~4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
& ]' J/ y: s# u* @1. Mothers don't do spare time.) f( c0 O1 }& N: e
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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5 }( A) P# h1 QWhat would it take to make your mom perfect?
0 c$ x# _' m2 {( ~! J8 k1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.( q9 Z) w4 ]" ^
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 6 n: |0 K) }0 y2 X
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
+ j0 {; y# A- x4 ^" p% {* n2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
; P! b2 T2 _+ h) ^3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. . d3 j ~3 d4 [: t7 W" T0 R& g/ G3 g
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