鲜花( 1394) 鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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3 H- `6 I/ f+ t+ `5 ^: ?Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.2 T9 d" X) x. S* ^* y6 o5 B$ K
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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( G ?) V: a ~4 J' u) `) N- yIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.# p; Z5 T8 O+ n. `/ G# J$ ^4 T
, _7 `0 K% h6 b: MLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
+ w* ^/ t& I' Z' \make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 1 v3 R% { [: x4 @: O% G/ N
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 5 P6 I7 ?5 Q9 P' H8 H
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.0 K* o1 [. V6 P* p1 d8 g9 }# f
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..2 D. j r8 d& L$ w" o' s
! d& a- g! ? {: P' p3 wWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. ! I3 g( V8 \+ e, o' Q
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Rinse conditioner off hair./ j% z+ p" H" y
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.
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; G; p! }% s' Q3 V9 I: x" J. oSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.2 w9 D; Y2 r; @& D- t
2 e o6 X% g1 P8 j# ASpray mold spots with Tilex.
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j/ o6 L ~" Y. k3 NGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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1 u( g/ e- H' y' b- X9 X9 f: EWrap hair in super absorbent towel. 1 u) ]! X$ b# N. y( m1 {- Y
9 ?- \- ?& I. S! ~" x- JReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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0 g" H& ^9 s+ iIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 7 S, B4 w% m1 I" i: T- s
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/ B: O* s; j2 a/ gHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 3 b1 w! f6 `. o7 W2 l l. f. `: U
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Walk naked to the bathroom.$ Y$ m% `$ a% k. H, U, S' `6 z
, J& Q& k% j4 v& V) ~! L L0 AIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 9 o- n4 X1 Y) i" j
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. / B4 V2 H- T7 J: W! j- F/ h
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 1 y [- n0 g5 X& I( y
) c# p% q4 @" }) V+ ?Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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, H& c3 V4 r8 }4 oBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. " c; H: N+ O# \' p! \% X2 v) N
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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) D, P: q$ X0 m5 nSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 0 _" S+ ^ |9 d$ `/ N1 T3 L
5 m4 S8 ?0 V9 ^8 zWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 4 a, i. _+ x6 t% n- [8 ~) _+ ^8 ]+ N
* e# ~% d4 N: d5 A% D/ `& @( u; T* Q5 VWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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3 |0 ^/ F5 o6 l, K# rPee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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5 _1 W+ \! I+ dPartially dry off.
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/ u1 D) I+ t$ ]) S' L" u% Q( w5 }Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 8 W3 a; [; u3 W& G
- g1 v8 k3 m) fAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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: ?' n6 g9 W) C" X+ fLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. # a+ S! B9 Z" J+ j& u2 w3 l
1 @4 u+ u" L! }- P6 mReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. ; K E9 \+ X" M# e
+ \4 n5 s5 ]8 EThrow wet towel on bed.
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4 U! a' C& H1 V' m f, m! \$ ]( TIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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