 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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- }4 Z6 x" T& i3 CTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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/ Q7 H! i$ L$ hWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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( C6 h3 k& G* y8 }If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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" ?4 l# ?- Z; q. G n/ f' ?Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
2 [& U2 F' T% K$ A/ Smake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.: ^: S+ B$ q( ]# [: H1 A
! `' ]4 u/ g) r9 Z$ @6 hGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. . k F3 A8 ^/ z c0 D3 d
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. I% ~0 D7 n8 w
, C* }+ ~1 Z+ N# KWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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7 w* n: l) j& J) S$ {0 R& {Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..# }- x1 x; j# f o( K, o: q
1 k, R- @9 M m8 f8 p5 O. b6 m2 jWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 4 p+ z6 O4 a! T, D
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.1 F# S, p2 v V5 X
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Shave armpits and legs." o! B6 R8 _3 ?0 s7 H7 @
7 v$ ^- l5 A6 O, L" bTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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. y8 H, j: Z7 jSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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+ B5 b+ N; ?# E. v+ v4 Y8 XGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 9 j8 R* Q1 M' B& F* x- Y4 [- f* g
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. ( a$ `" H" g: f4 u; M; l/ ^! n
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 3 N* N) p9 o' D8 m2 a
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i# c6 l- J4 hHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 1 Q" f$ n# ?2 @& e" Y
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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* S. @1 V- p$ ? r! KWalk naked to the bathroom.
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+ m. e, ~+ K; x( |6 d! y0 gIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. / K+ C% A& `, S+ t! Y/ }* Q/ g% w
/ h2 N, c3 _$ L& V' [+ mLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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0 U, K2 [* [& j7 K9 rAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 4 X: l. `; t7 b7 P7 ^
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 7 B5 @) T, \" t/ ^6 G
/ v( ^; G7 T( e& pBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 9 r' n5 H b! V' O! m- U) _8 h- q
7 [7 Y2 P0 ?+ NFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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& \$ d% ]# F9 q' XSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. + N4 ]% x7 I ^# x- A. a
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 1 A$ d8 f- s( { q) P
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. & q5 ]1 \* v" {$ C- J! _2 R+ D
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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+ B2 o8 b7 y( Y$ g1 _/ Z1 X0 m; i1 q1 BFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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2 A( `) M0 L# `) t* b/ kAdmire wiener size in mirror again. $ Y) s. p" X# ]) w1 S
, E& f# `1 H. t$ u6 ~: y9 o0 ILeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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) d& Y, O# {; L. X) y5 cReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. ) x* B( V2 e! Q, D; c' v& [$ F( n6 F
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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2 o! V* G9 {- w5 _$ WIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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