 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : ' Y/ r% f; x: a _# L" t
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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6 K h$ Q I1 z- A3 v9 O, PLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
1 j) ?; E' h* R6 O9 \) Amake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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4 C$ m! \& g; z" eGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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0 D# {* b+ w8 H, gWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.- O. F$ ?5 s- b; r1 d, J
% e6 `6 Z/ }! M6 HCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..+ s3 c/ P' ^1 l. W
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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2 {. \( d5 X& }! RWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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5 q/ `& ?, B4 VRinse conditioner off hair." b- l) i2 R. R! }
3 C3 M* `) S& M' J/ SShave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.# p( x# q! W! `! D! d" L7 D* k
/ x; _# k5 O* g, a: h' N. m* GSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower. K$ [' @/ N; e) w' G
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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; {& p% J# }. A; W9 g7 R8 v# N8 iGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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7 V1 {- s$ o% v5 u" f+ ], eWrap hair in super absorbent towel. & O( V, ?- J' i1 W) ]
' }3 p5 R1 Q9 {5 N9 j6 Y: q6 iReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. / }: [2 z9 o# \2 W( C
0 h4 w- t0 {7 p; C8 }1 zIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 6 _! y- V# v# U$ n
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+ a4 u) G0 Z) M- S) H$ U! aHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: d& O9 l# W) T9 M
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.# I2 v* t* `2 [( E" \" V
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. " y; c% o" O/ B
- r G( e( W/ Q8 ~, RLook at your manly physique in the mirror. , _3 g- J2 n' m$ [1 ]
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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9 y8 w, w( r! T, J# P* g% xGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 4 J) z1 Y2 [& o
" B7 x" \( s* u# ]7 x+ h8 F+ |Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. / \; R# Z6 m1 q: Y- `
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. ) A6 ?4 w( j6 s% o+ D
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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3 j' F4 w9 `; }( b4 ^ kWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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. y! O" F4 s* YFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. : W1 e2 ^9 S: Z; n" F" }9 N
1 E6 l+ N2 F1 j1 t, W& hAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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7 k6 ^2 r, v7 k! t( l3 rReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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8 a' X; [& h! B# Y, F* Y0 }( NIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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