 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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& ^" |1 e8 V( P8 H) tTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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0 {" p( u+ W: Y$ JWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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+ K: Q* K" c, L$ E# JIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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6 J/ N, M" N7 n; k3 ^0 HLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- * @2 v' x9 a+ I' v2 v7 U
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.# R t% S' r7 `) o* l6 }
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 9 s3 k1 V6 z& b/ M) s
1 l; f: U0 W) _, L; CWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ( C. u% V4 W1 m0 G: u
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.! u" s+ u4 K1 n" p# K9 D
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..4 Y( v! t* d: H; J4 ~+ ~: b/ H
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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$ h& H2 b+ [' ? wWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 3 p y& W6 H1 s% e9 r
! y/ H; x; R- }2 l. w' l3 qRinse conditioner off hair.
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) _. S4 A7 ^& D5 mShave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower. O. V" S& l( ~ N
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. \: @. B( ~, @
4 `" N. `) q7 P: ?$ k; Q" N' c3 |Spray mold spots with Tilex. - {9 h4 F2 K" y% P1 r8 m
% p/ L" z1 i- W: RGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 1 Y; j, A5 T& q* z: ?: T* A, u
( G R# D5 b$ g: z- l( Q. ^Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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1 d" V% I3 [* Y0 ]0 Z; SIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: % L8 U4 W- Y% a8 Z- f' S: z" D( M3 ~
! S) _9 r5 [8 H0 tTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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8 o' L7 j1 c/ lWalk naked to the bathroom.' a- S0 E- f7 `# w
6 H+ a: `$ X) O5 e( F8 @9 zIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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: x4 U" X* G( o, F+ _2 h* A- oLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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6 _" Y: d2 e. R9 o& R/ k- [* QAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. $ b* a8 U1 g( Y: ]8 l: H& z
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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9 L) }1 \3 m: I" GBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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, ^* {. T* s/ aFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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1 p6 s" k4 c" I) KWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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+ o/ j3 r2 P( J! N% K& ~4 GWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. . O" X i2 I+ _1 Y+ F/ f) w9 s+ o: I4 x5 P3 F
3 v! o: x& k" T8 xPee. $ s' r$ |5 b) a7 G2 U# g
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Rinse off and get out of shower. + z! G% C0 l z- W; H
( m0 g6 T% v |$ L; z6 ^Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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, ^) F' H% s& T9 p1 ]; QAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 6 H7 Y% ~2 p' |9 r4 V% w% s5 A
9 \7 j+ K4 }* K* aLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 7 Q! U" V! o- d6 v v/ b
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. * G9 w c) @! n! Y, b
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Throw wet towel on bed. 6 S" f) `8 U$ `
- [+ r5 D- E. i- XIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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