Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:

6 Z$ R$ h$ o. J& \# r1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
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9 D1 h! c  G( [0 y6 q# Y2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

! g5 J2 @. F# [' K5 ^8 V" W3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

& Y0 d5 q3 a9 J# H4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
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9 x$ g: k. v: ?5 @3 t8 S0 M5. Are You Andy or Barney?
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6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

$ T- B% P( N/ }( [0 L0 t7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

8 S" {) C8 s. ], m- s3 U  C0 z2 S8. I pay your salary!

- v% C/ u% g/ W$ n1 e9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
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10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
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11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

2 [# @) y2 I' c  d12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"