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Blonde Car Accident
. _7 p1 \! C; r4 Q% WOne day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
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' i! o4 a x' v# z0 {The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
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4 w% e# F) k% @! f- l, ~: DHe took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.: O/ v7 L6 E% M( p8 t8 s
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Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
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The blonde started laughing.' ^+ P$ j8 Y! T8 b6 D
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This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
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This time the blonde laughed even harder." M& w5 a' F% w% h' Z
# h5 |; i. [: v P) @+ ILivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car./ r6 t% S8 r' |7 ~* {* S' y4 ~9 C& e, V
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The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny. U: V+ p! D! j& j0 _
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The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
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5 l$ K W) I2 A4 VRowing Your Boat
$ D) t' Z$ M x; E: |+ u: aTwo blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
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7 p0 p+ ^; f T) ^4 z$ DThe driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
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3 P( |( u9 R! oTo this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
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I Want to Buy That& o' e [, R. u0 y. i- L3 ^
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.4 S, r% U" q3 [+ Y8 q7 z
! X( f7 g/ S+ pThe clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
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The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
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Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.% n# n8 n* X. O5 z5 ~
/ f3 D3 Y8 ~- @; c$ SSure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
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: M% B" W3 G+ j- k; D2 {# f- QTo her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.4 O: T9 X; [: i9 a
% P. C* ]' s |9 cThe blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
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) ?: v1 W7 b* W3 b& U' VThe clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
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Are You Really Sure?- Y/ g6 e, `4 n. J
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
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& {3 g I: P8 `1 M- aIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."( \7 w; w1 d8 l; C) U9 ]. c1 v
* g( E. g. P; ~, c0 H6 ~Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
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The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."' X+ D8 I1 `# P( T' \
1 l; u! {: D# z& S' u2 yBlonde Sky Divers, x( d5 s+ Y. {. [: ~
A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.
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' ]8 I0 _ d+ GThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.
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/ F1 i( m# S2 Q! E8 c' Y$ N9 {. V B' qShe pulls the emergency cord and still nothing./ `4 X8 _0 o. a: g
* F$ i1 H% Y5 h. h/ X0 qThe blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
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5 G4 a; I1 U C Q, s[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
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