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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a4 A; K- ~% ]7 w- z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
( _& a1 y0 u1 Mthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
8 J! p  a. R+ L! L7 n' Athe newfie would like to play a fun game.
! Z3 I. G# u& E  
" |& w: [+ C9 ?# ]; D. h" f# N The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
" ~% l9 l$ p0 O: E he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The: a4 q: l  F8 j8 s* G% Q1 d
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
& j8 V& V6 |3 U: d. oask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
4 f7 f( x# w  D2 ^4 P: Y# c. ryou pay me only $5.
/ O3 |, T/ C/ ?+ W  k . T# D3 Q6 B$ d/ p3 j) M; ?; |7 h1 O
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
5 u5 K! w" g3 h6 V3 F will pay you $500. ) @4 T) W$ S& x" R8 D" t7 _; k

: J. }. u* b" W' j8 A This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
2 l0 m( [% E. ^the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
2 O+ G1 h- S5 F) J5 d8 A, N" @
3 i; @7 C) {# v6 ~" h* H. TThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
3 O; H: r* o# ]9 x8 K7 R7 v9 L0 Jthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
9 Z1 F0 U- ?5 A) a/ O* e4 A3 a! J+ r
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his% t+ [& x: r1 Z5 g- V' G
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the7 {$ [3 `! Q# o* B; |
lawyer. 6 Z" q2 _1 `8 {8 K

7 O9 c' h" G6 m+ i& m; V9 H" _Now, it's the newfie's turn.3 Y' l4 q" A2 M7 h6 e* v1 P

8 K3 u5 x) f  U/ P8 wHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with! T& w4 l* Q) N6 X! h5 J
three legs, and comes down with four?'
  p: d# p& U% E
; z% J3 q9 @8 f* o& RThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
8 m0 ?. B& b. H2 Breferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
' M! d4 _$ O  L' hthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
* }5 K1 C  L8 Nof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and; Y9 z! P9 f3 ~7 q7 c8 ~
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
) ?8 e- f0 E. T3 Z% {, F" H/ p! nback to sleep. 6 H& K9 p# _/ K, B* b7 O
8 {, z- j. R. S+ Y% U7 P0 N9 Q9 M
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He# P+ G5 T7 h) w# X
wakes the newfie up and asks, . q/ T) @. z; V( X
3 F& r  `2 _; L
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and' U8 m) E) j7 P  D/ C$ Q, b
comes down with four?' ) S/ Z5 ?, x: r
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $57 y5 {( E! E8 W* U9 r) e( y
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the/ c/ Z( _$ R$ f9 @" v
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
5 B2 ~7 J$ x7 M% r( ]( q( E1 F% O7 N>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
) G0 j  P3 e* j) c+ K3 F8 c- o>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the # ]# N1 D! y) w' l+ S
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ! N- \! |% ]& M$ d# A
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
" z( D0 @$ j& O# O2 v$ p# y' ^3 Q& z" p: m' {3 w  I
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
! r' k$ m! ]! t6 e( S7 n  |1 B! ^>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
7 L% t+ l( M: |>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
& C7 X7 k) h9 \1 ~" s+ \>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
6 |8 Q7 r4 A' ]& a>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
4 s' a0 I: @% V5 f; Y
6 z( W# P: h; O% w>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ; |  N- O2 a1 S3 ], e
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
8 C7 w& C1 b1 D6 n7 @>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand + [" ^( Q/ k$ S" j6 U
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ! E( u, s; B) F+ k. ^
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a8 W: A8 B% [, Z5 ?4 P( R6 a; o
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb2 w4 F( W+ b" q, J5 [
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if* d% s- [* z: K. c, O
the newfie would l ...
0 ~$ q, Z  s2 i7 }1 x

1 `& L$ Z) V& c8 n" b
# u% K! b0 J3 H# s  M8 q好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:1 O) j5 k1 Z3 g* A  Q  C
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
6 a; d% o: ?, e) k好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
4 r3 \# [2 S" r& L0 o) }9 U5 `% B/ z加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

, C5 U/ F( [1 L4 f+ k; I真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
$ w( K6 }& o4 n# Q& F1 n0 h8 H# {6 r4 L5 Z) Q1 x

$ e6 Z) F% ]% P
( J2 D4 i& j; Y好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
, j4 A, @. u+ }“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,5 P9 B7 ^: M( g' E& o
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
7 s6 t6 }% L" W: i& Z
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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3 W% F2 Y. S3 V% E9 }$ `真聪明,偶像啊
3 x0 I' z; s9 u$ n1 {4 w- y

3 T; N* }$ [8 k$ t$ ]* L全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
6 ^' F! A8 r# ~+ E5 q4 k: t  c' U: R$ {: r- b' O5 ?# K
  B2 i6 X" K' n5 y& W( [- t
全盘接受一下。

0 d  J4 b0 D& o+ P! l. G9 \真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
" \5 v+ q5 _8 X7 N
6 s, p- a  I# g; y( \真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
# J; U" |2 B, a2 ?# j

  y! u* A( S# E
; J5 ]5 Q" e" k; Q; n别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ' m8 H6 [# t: j6 K) W; b, W

- N8 n& i- J. k+ E& Y2 i; `% N2 @& H+ A& [" Z- o% i% u* {
. e, x$ L* y- ~* x( I
别把我往坏路上领啊。

6 }) k6 L" M" B5 ^" M你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
) d0 h( m1 t+ ?- H" y2 ~2 v- z# `加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
3 s. W' g! q- i6 A  ]
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
2 G  e0 ^$ U9 e* U) K% P+ w. m& ^" m+ X8 t9 l. b: y
真博学,偶像啊。

. ^- {; o% t$ Q  t$ l2 V大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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3 m& N. W; y/ D0 k/ \9 M, p3 Q( V大学教授哦,能不剥削?
  t: y' `6 e5 m/ O% u
她是大学教瘦?' b4 C+ J7 @4 B$ n  N
大学教胖还差不多
" m9 e, |6 T$ `, H' f8 Z/ ?她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 4 D9 l, W1 W" ~5 W$ [6 s1 J& b- E' @; U
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

8 Z; G$ ]0 D; F' n8 m8 H1 t" j说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ; ^& h! G* y) b  \( [: M1 r
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

4 }8 B- k2 I- k' Q7 F* h6 J# X6 h+ d0 V3 Z
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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