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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
, U& Z* j. A) E% h5 j1 f/ tlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
4 E8 N! C" a3 `5 t& E( _1 M: F+ tthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if( p1 C+ U$ Q3 x1 R
the newfie would like to play a fun game. + c% \6 u2 u# P3 q9 j$ v4 b  `
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so4 l6 K- b9 A) g; k) T
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
+ T* S0 n3 n+ |8 o6 ~- o! Z" M lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
1 P  k- b7 d$ L- k* f8 ~, e% vask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,; ~% l$ K% n! A$ `2 R
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I0 l2 A, _2 P. ]2 v* Z2 R/ J) I
will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep" w% ~5 r8 B/ O0 h6 K8 E6 i2 o. M8 d
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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/ ?2 R: m4 D( i1 @The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
/ Y& P& p! S/ C: Othe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ) W" @1 N. D% }2 e
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his: L( \& T! p% G% e" V2 s- i
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the( _0 \3 ^* V% [
lawyer. 1 A0 V+ N8 z; U. s

: ~# ~; i; N5 u' y- [Now, it's the newfie's turn.. S  T7 r' ~+ K3 M+ Y
) {3 D7 v. j$ Q- F' a/ Y1 S) o6 ]
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
$ t4 x9 P" @6 c- Z6 A9 v3 bthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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( n$ x' i5 h+ m9 I* ^: M3 ]! EThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all% ?: n/ l7 m9 h9 c' l
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all3 R& ?4 S* v+ W+ H4 D3 D, T& z1 K
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour$ f* E0 n8 I( m5 a, u
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
) L$ O- l/ C. t6 _4 S0 o- j" K0 Nhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right4 i- T  y% A+ q9 B1 \5 j( b
back to sleep. ! D7 h( C2 }4 G% h* C" i3 E! Q# C

! ?+ n' @$ Y5 o. }- _8 G  FThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
+ p" ~' U8 A. L! K7 Zwakes the newfie up and asks,
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' f4 H1 m! q' l; ~8 v'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
& q  U- m" G5 t9 ^comes down with four?'
' i& x4 P3 L' F- h
; }. X* x# t/ zThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5" \7 N, [* F2 }
and goes back to sleep.& F+ c) u* E' \1 U5 g8 P5 E. w! J0 W

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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) l: x4 K$ M9 c- d9 E& I8 q8 YLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the* |+ ^- I  E' M2 f$ J$ Y7 o  d

" b8 k/ B% H& t3 y6 w* {9 t0 E3 y>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 2 E3 |9 A: \& i& U' U
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
# v1 @2 |! {1 U* f>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the # E3 |% ~2 T+ X9 [) C) J1 E+ [$ o+ K
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 7 V7 Z8 s! n- b$ `2 F
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct5 h- {( \- D7 k; [' v  z$ A; k
8 Y. ~! ]& ~- E2 j" U5 b# S, E# m
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 8 b1 X+ ]- |0 m1 V* h3 L
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
' E1 L- m# l+ |+ v>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 5 b+ i0 U9 e' t" h( \( m
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
( N, E4 S7 x8 v! K>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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5 R3 @0 B9 e2 p% }" M1 d$ ~; A. l>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
# S. C# a! z" d4 \9 U$ D>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the # V* n& W3 ~" ~9 @7 w! {- G
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
8 p. r% K  Q& j# j! G* u>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 , e* A* `, @4 C( ^+ R: Q0 D7 \
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
% y/ k  k4 m6 x+ N! o7 D  x4 A. E" P' Wlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% F. w+ t( \# H
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if5 Y& ]1 s8 U5 ]0 s9 ?
the newfie would l ...
4 W- S! j" r( G/ V# I
; |; Q  M! E% ^. D; E

% x6 G* b$ O( C# f. j( b6 D5 ~( {好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:# I" G$ m" @& O* k) T/ G
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
* I! f/ B) j! g. m好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 $ V% O/ w4 z4 [/ n8 P
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
: n4 w7 Y1 e4 e  U& R
真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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' a7 C2 k6 H. i! f' C% ?$ }
7 [8 {9 o% O5 u3 j9 j: J/ @: R
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:! Q7 n9 c( q/ w! m1 L) |7 y
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
& ?4 V$ ^0 o# j) ?$ R好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
/ b  n/ L- v) d# G7 P0 _
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
$ O5 u. j" m8 Q5 X$ g! w/ [5 c4 s/ m( h( _& |" I( R. C# y
真聪明,偶像啊
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6 n# {# Z4 n* a7 i  k全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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* P- S* p/ \* z3 ?# H! D7 m; z& ?. Y1 e) `; _
全盘接受一下。

' [5 G) L0 g+ b真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
1 N6 d- c) x2 Z, E; O6 s2 |
6 A0 Q+ c, I* i' h2 Q% T真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
! ?& R" M' `$ |6 X% ?

  ^3 w& Y+ B# k6 x' x
8 ~  {6 W& d  v8 G0 w6 ~! i; X9 r别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 8 p# R4 m; ?! z. ?) w' [( V
  R  Q4 A: Y! D/ Q, y# l& o

  [- r6 V4 O. U2 W* \$ G$ `
5 O: U' d! S) r别把我往坏路上领啊。

: D* S' t- G0 o8 E6 q你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
+ P' D' W+ M8 k* f8 C加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

6 y  P7 Y# l3 M/ z8 O9 X+ Y3 M- M多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。

* }/ {5 m7 [* n0 K2 i大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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8 E5 ]. T6 ]1 o3 t( w9 ~$ K: s$ ~; F大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?6 }) K9 }; o$ C/ L) g
大学教胖还差不多 7 A& a, {3 J6 \1 v
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 3 `. R, d+ n' S7 s$ K2 n- [
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
7 q" b% q( u! @# s0 v, c+ J
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 6 a; x5 x7 |" l) B
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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