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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
% H1 R6 Z3 g* [long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
* L! H7 k1 m+ m$ n  o4 f' ~  U6 ~that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
, K8 P  w" C0 D( _# m: J* Pthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
& e- g7 B2 W$ g# W" l4 K8 n3 P" B3 W  
1 s) k4 I7 s# z7 d9 Z: B% t The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
" ^8 z! O/ `3 T" B he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
/ f+ r; C4 T# { lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
; _4 h4 ~) w# W' B( mask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,1 e3 T9 c9 U3 v3 O
you pay me only $5. & n: y) \5 o( X, {" s
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
0 Q- j2 a7 _" r( b, [ will pay you $500. . @6 P/ C3 ]  P2 x  x8 w0 s
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
; a* X+ v1 O" g- W/ O, g7 vthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
, k  F$ ~& X% u- K& p8 @/ O; R8 p
3 y6 r  D) e& z% m0 ]' hThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's2 d( k9 ?: F8 d; c! x( \! r
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his+ X! d9 Q4 o3 B: F& i& y
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
/ H4 u8 u2 e5 n) H" O/ T8 \$ Dlawyer.
" z/ R6 _; V7 O
( g  C6 z$ ]0 O5 X; O- l. UNow, it's the newfie's turn.3 r- }. y. X  n% {8 g* C9 h% N$ \6 R) V

: D6 w  N' m; f0 g9 nHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with' @# m; _3 J" I0 f" G
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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: E- l& `: g: P4 e% tThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
) V4 y1 U: E- S9 y1 T1 Zreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
- H) z0 P( c* L' W( i3 f6 @' uthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
: m* Q  o, Y" M3 z3 ?of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and7 j) @$ n5 R: L4 |
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
- k* \6 [* c! P( I4 b, N1 D5 e9 kback to sleep.
+ I+ K, T5 p. L. D8 e- m( D0 s" ^" x9 p+ X
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
9 c9 E) V! h& s! swakes the newfie up and asks, - K, G' X: K- P  P" z  z

2 [8 b7 l6 H: m4 Q& l* `) m'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and0 _  D# U# P$ r% |2 S2 L
comes down with four?'
$ b/ K4 {* d) G; M
7 U$ r, a& T( M+ v' i3 u5 ?The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $52 l' U' B3 \# N7 V1 a4 A$ ?1 l
and goes back to sleep.
- g' ?: y# D8 D3 k1 {1 E( n. A" m$ Y+ x3 A) G* p* l" t
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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& O) Y1 W7 D( U. e! Q6 [! mLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
' T* k+ z3 M/ @8 X# y7 ]* {& p& k' c8 f4 b# v0 U( _! H
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
8 d% T. |0 U/ [% f: E/ m>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
; ?5 J8 _$ J# w6 ^( D" G>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
+ J+ d$ t- M8 L, V+ a>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
/ N9 ]- W  ?+ W6 _# c* x>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct* H, z: O! j" N
' n5 s3 c1 l) F* A# f0 T5 G1 Q0 a
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research " c/ ~) z. k" q9 d
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a # j4 y- r, [5 w/ I6 v& \
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
* F+ [6 a- v1 U9 o' s>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ! a7 T. L4 b* d, K# T: G
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
" Y3 h/ w8 o" Q+ _/ a/ u/ O: ?# Z1 }8 d" O( g  J7 L7 k
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's $ d* A5 d8 X4 z4 C0 H% G: L% f
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
, }( h! ~% c; e>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
  C% Q. Y! ~3 O>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 $ K) i9 C2 L" ]; v9 `; U3 ^
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a% c$ c" B6 _4 v) ?8 w9 B" X
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
6 B+ p9 J. {9 U5 q6 N: a' D5 I0 N4 L. qthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if8 H3 ], t" @& x- M7 j
the newfie would l ...

( T: P' t- W7 G6 E( z% ^- C5 T3 _: h: c% L2 Q4 `+ C$ ?" W' h- \

& P4 @9 \) B9 C: `; m+ Y好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
  R, n# q. l. C% P+ @% J“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,/ ?) D) E' o; e
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
/ G8 v. H( P! u7 _* w' k6 a加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
, ^0 V8 k( a2 [! d! K
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ( _0 I2 u* P" k% N& p' b1 s

! E, r+ C" r2 l+ ^6 {
2 M  ]& D4 ]+ P. w
1 f8 y/ |( y; l) `5 T好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
* _- F  b7 d, u7 L' {5 C“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,$ _8 ^' `8 @) w0 i
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
; j( _* T6 v* q! \/ P
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
) u% O- T  k$ y% i) k
$ c8 ^) p. M4 n" q" ?真聪明,偶像啊
3 n4 m' E7 f3 O
' m% S2 c( O3 ^* }) h+ p
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 " E" Z6 H& a3 @( ^8 D7 B9 I5 \8 |
/ c) A7 b. ~- @9 K
# j3 V: c( A7 @
全盘接受一下。

0 n+ M5 ?' X9 X0 K5 P9 t真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
1 g" _( [) D7 ?" L
' g9 O2 y4 ^8 j; n5 g6 V$ e2 f% K真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
2 V3 s" M5 S. [* d% M0 R( m0 ]

0 j' ~  e( e2 I& x
7 F% H7 l4 \. }- B别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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' ]; A' s% h5 Q+ \1 h! k( W, j/ z# X2 ^
% ]7 Q- F, c' ~* x  f
别把我往坏路上领啊。
. X, R$ f3 A; U% W( a" R9 _
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
  C! [  z9 w7 z6 i8 p加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

5 C0 ^. ~0 m" v多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 9 f/ J+ Y: S& x0 F8 H

/ U* K$ |% r# b& l  o真博学,偶像啊。
; [& v/ ?: i0 v/ Z- Y3 w) Q1 U6 c
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ; S% Y6 Q. A8 _* t8 j2 W

1 F; ]4 ?. ~# j$ a; l大学教授哦,能不剥削?
1 E; s" y; D2 V5 C' T$ c0 m5 J% Q/ q
她是大学教瘦?* n9 R3 R, s" n/ A
大学教胖还差不多 ) }" H. ~  i9 t" m
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ) p/ ?7 H4 D% c* d4 O3 u  l" k
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
: D1 u9 b: l$ A: n& z, X1 w
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ \+ u7 _* H5 n3 j3 A
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

, ~" K" ~* u/ _- ]% W+ c' h( ^+ B# U; @5 ^
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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