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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 v# Z2 n, c& ]4 [. L5 v! L$ C
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb8 M+ z' E% p; z* S
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
5 a% T4 K7 e& i  ?# ^the newfie would like to play a fun game. - z2 K7 F4 L7 h$ p
  # O, s% m" c( e2 G% ~. h0 V/ T
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
+ K1 l6 v- Q/ @7 L4 p* S he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The. v  k! Z1 z4 D7 A2 \' C: q4 A8 }
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I5 A2 u/ Y. k; \0 t
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,5 R" U6 A( B  O" \1 L
you pay me only $5.
; I4 q: ~0 _; x  Q: x' G
& H" ?9 m9 K$ l5 r; ~ You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
/ a' D; I3 b2 l1 ?& ? will pay you $500. # {/ b  j6 G- f7 S  t, j0 r1 o

$ |/ A( Y! F7 C4 p' B3 V This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
; |6 i+ E( y3 d$ dthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 0 o  e( X, c  Y
4 d9 {2 Q! H5 b+ P
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's; [6 Y* c' \8 v! f
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ' [+ O7 m* x3 V* d) o7 @
8 p1 R' d! P" H( d6 a5 b  A
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
& R3 G5 `- R$ p3 L6 q& a, Kpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the! e% d) b4 J) _/ H
lawyer. 0 y9 _! C+ `7 i) O5 p& x
. |" M- G+ g% }  e6 w* o
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
; L/ a0 ]' @( b/ X
# u0 w: z# i* Q! c3 L9 G+ zHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
; E2 i( k- b7 A% l. r; Tthree legs, and comes down with four?' - d0 I) r% A3 Z3 ~" S, F
. ^6 F  \; M( Y. e0 M
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
0 S; l( y) n# r7 K7 [# |5 rreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all/ ]$ `9 U. f6 i' `) Y' U
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour3 o# V3 o$ T% M# A" t
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and# \5 f3 S$ ?) N8 e3 G% P  V0 K
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
* T5 T; c+ N+ Q6 f0 I$ m+ h) Lback to sleep. % ~) P* h8 Z/ a/ d' ?: ]
7 Z1 E: N  ?# F& t! [( Q: X
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
1 C3 ~/ ]% f+ ^( z% z% Owakes the newfie up and asks, * P+ U+ L, K6 S8 R& I; K) k

; m6 s6 J0 l0 T9 p'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and. E9 c) \8 S3 q
comes down with four?' 2 q! L, n1 ~, T" n2 U* v' n8 s
- N- r" `( D) n
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5' P) n; V3 Z, Z+ B  V9 |. [, N
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!; z2 E1 c" y3 H

: y/ K% o! j& T$ I! ^$ V4 kLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the+ {. {$ n3 i8 b+ G& _0 k8 ]
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 7 T5 G' i5 v$ V  q, o5 g5 E# \* w) [
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
* \5 R; X, q$ {7 x$ J>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 1 Y+ I, J' `4 s8 l7 V' {2 o3 k) R# C, ~
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 6 C1 P3 z1 K% o: p
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct9 D% o: C/ T2 |9 }

7 l5 G* z* F7 n5 c) j! b- N>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
. D/ Y* Y/ V- @) T>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a , D% P! S" r5 z0 Z" _5 ?& Q/ E. J( E
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 0 w. G$ k3 `7 O" K9 Q9 x  v* S0 O
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
2 f; \& m; T' Q% ^>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three, {- F! S! K( i/ w- v3 |
6 ~4 y2 G7 j% k0 n/ w7 f/ L
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
/ }3 u9 \+ f4 I6 `7 v( j>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 7 W4 E# |  h* @& v  g% J
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand   v$ i1 h% O" Z4 I) `$ w. w% g
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
1 |  B, j5 y( ]+ a9 Y4 W7 O. _A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
, D5 k& m2 [7 along flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb/ m+ A8 \, }6 F! w/ Z4 Y
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if# O- ?9 E- t. a& S+ d" K
the newfie would l ...

) N  C& Q2 i* b/ i0 V
- |8 W7 m! m' }3 z$ {! x- f
6 U4 {3 l8 |; I+ E& n! g好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
# |  }4 h* P! B: n“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ @; N2 B5 ]" H好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
$ t$ E& @1 Z& B; ?+ u: S* }加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( A" u' U$ M  R% N9 [% t/ }! e# A真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ) A# a6 O( V" w! x0 L
+ E: @3 ]& v) ?) v- K; N

, v4 Z5 e7 c" t
: L" _9 m1 ~& m  e, ]3 J好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
+ ]9 \. W- Z0 V+ R“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
( a" o4 L: ^; V  v1 q: Y4 Y) r好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

( S+ o( f; o. e/ i* O$ [  T真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ; f/ J; a! `0 R& i/ p3 F

2 S5 K3 W6 d4 T* V/ G" W真聪明,偶像啊
; f& t) `6 c9 o  |- D1 A  @

5 B) L' y4 b& z& ?9 A+ r  B+ g全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ' l+ G; E3 f2 m8 }: S8 G# V* ^' }
! L8 ~, ?% n" ~4 Y

+ o$ A' a: ?# C& p全盘接受一下。
: C, J! i! I4 }7 V4 z  Z
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
- B5 K# ]+ e- |, S1 V( e- Y
9 W9 g9 L* U5 v真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

6 C  F& J: y" |) p# q+ I. X
1 V9 \- ?1 N$ b; l5 v7 ~& J) u2 B& t3 r+ S5 G9 Y
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
% [4 ^* P! C# M  X; ^( b4 L* ~+ J8 H3 m6 y

7 B. o( U! g$ d& x% M
& N- |. @+ d/ h# b" w* \2 c( y* c9 p9 m别把我往坏路上领啊。

/ `/ q4 ]+ A( R6 u- i4 b* D4 q3 e你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
9 P* a( k* @  ?加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
2 }  W; \( G9 ~! m- U
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ) h8 i+ a2 M8 A4 G  l! |

" c: T3 G8 I9 L/ f真博学,偶像啊。

3 T4 o3 ~. u* A% @大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 . \1 {# E: g# \, O! p6 R+ V

4 d5 W5 P8 S' ~: Y3 _大学教授哦,能不剥削?
  n) _0 D/ ~" J  @- r. u
她是大学教瘦?
- w0 i# g% }! \大学教胖还差不多
/ S7 j  f  k/ e- |; d& w  I她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
. ~8 G+ ], r: r9 `  |/ r1 h1 b紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
  b( N) n. S( B  g8 l7 L& C
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
% W: m3 A- O6 N8 d# c紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

! Q' p# H5 x  [7 A
) v' `2 p& d6 g& @6 \  [. w; D; N哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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