埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5236|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
6 j3 Q/ |5 J& |long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb& t9 h: \3 X2 O! t" v
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if9 u4 l6 {8 l& S5 ?. w% P
the newfie would like to play a fun game.   C: B6 b' q' r2 B9 ^% m
  : n1 T4 F/ v8 a6 o: R8 R
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so7 e6 k  u4 E' p6 m5 }8 h* z- k" e
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The. t: `" B- g; }9 N
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
, g- V  I/ e0 m! I- o: e* a$ jask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
+ g4 d% ^  V; x5 lyou pay me only $5.
& C& |0 Q5 d$ h8 c4 b, x) z  j , p- `3 }. h: `; I2 y9 ^3 _
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
) p. L# Q/ x. R will pay you $500.
( h4 `* b7 y5 C/ } 0 U1 ]3 W, C7 Z  }
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
, ]6 N% E! L5 T' F2 {5 a$ }' @& ^the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. * a* }1 N" I$ ~
4 a+ n! M" V0 \4 a0 J2 M# J
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's$ m- a- h& g) A7 }5 n4 g. \- X$ _
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
, I( _$ a. V' `% G' c) U; y
- z! _* @3 O2 E! T# RThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his" t. h4 `) V' H, h9 c
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
6 ^6 k: K3 r$ A  C' `, m+ \0 Flawyer.
( z' }  E9 `0 }+ `) @7 a- ~7 _" I4 e+ _  q9 y6 m  B( J
Now, it's the newfie's turn.2 z  j. v/ y) |# A1 ~, ~! D

* U+ F- e3 ?) }) A) S( FHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with; w+ T! L* E$ |; k& X
three legs, and comes down with four?' & G; m9 U" L6 R6 L* l. I# }

. @- Y; }: |$ W" E2 @  u1 xThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
' C4 _6 W9 v8 Jreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all4 J: s; g- W- s- H5 n$ l: e
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour  S5 l6 i' t& h. @5 P) U
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
7 D7 U5 K  I+ x) Y! W) fhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
  [# `9 ~! ~5 Z' L1 ?back to sleep.
9 r" x  c  \. y
6 U" v2 e2 P" E* T+ vThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He+ t8 E, }) g: m7 ~- G; A; ~: G- c
wakes the newfie up and asks,
3 V2 ]# U: i; u/ U1 ~
4 N7 }+ a5 r/ ^7 U2 ?! e& i( _% m'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and7 K8 q$ ~; t/ ^2 o
comes down with four?' / ~5 M5 z" Z/ Z8 Q/ D, d: ]& [* t
, g3 _6 ^" E2 p/ D6 M  O% d
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
) l  S' I! k  V* }% F1 B" Aand goes back to sleep.. C; q( Z. Z. F6 x
/ f9 N! u7 y. D3 ~) |1 |8 X( Z
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
7 ?( M( j# z! X8 j/ a2 d0 o, |" f" c. Y( e. Q5 h, o
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
( j1 ]& d1 i6 }/ P% i: a8 l& F0 m9 b" W+ S6 p6 ]3 u( |
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two & G) U; G9 n. }. i% z6 m+ ]
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
; x; X+ T; l7 y>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the / I3 l$ o( v( G7 \1 C* O# P
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 9 q6 p! Y) J6 Y5 V! |* @
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct: ]1 w  N0 r8 q4 G
# }6 {1 Z$ w; J0 G8 K% W5 g
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
; z+ K# c, h, U2 N9 X; @1 n, q3 Z>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ; m" Q" R" @! G0 {7 f
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 3 N. x  [* U, I% H0 }- ]& P1 b9 Q
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, , Z" }$ ~% F8 ?; ~7 t$ U
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three3 N: r, W% p) c7 g% p3 a, s

0 w9 }/ }; w! \/ X- }>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 3 [! g3 y$ u9 K; p, O; ]
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 0 }; s( b. [, {
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
4 C6 ~; J- `" m0 S>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
9 u7 q- M  r8 }9 S+ N" Z# u2 F2 WA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a, Y$ J* m+ F' Z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb8 _+ I6 a3 ?  s: i4 |" @
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( A' D( O" F) |0 T! I. @the newfie would l ...

# K) [, b; |  S# b5 K: B8 U( C
6 ]" K9 X8 \. W6 V& j+ N) p
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:; K1 N/ l" V( t% B7 b
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,5 n. Y1 i; L, e( k
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 " V% p) r9 o# y- C7 R
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
8 C- s" {1 w* Y- l  e
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
3 @2 x4 w8 N- k: L% u1 M( I% f. e8 I$ x) @

& E  \6 f( [& E' ?0 u2 r; t! \* o3 P9 J/ d* \
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
, p1 r9 J1 I3 G; P“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,) u1 C/ o: b5 t2 Z1 U
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

6 |8 D  e# L( c& {真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
& z- F. I1 T/ X6 R6 S" Y, w- x8 {# T' @* e2 }& M2 a4 M2 b* `
真聪明,偶像啊

8 s) y# p' h% d& Z, `% S2 |0 o* T" s" P/ r* ]+ @
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
+ ~4 F7 s# z; m4 K7 K- m
3 Q! w+ ~: L  q
0 E# b' R) z/ U" n* z全盘接受一下。
) z# N9 d9 f' }; U
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
0 Z, A+ s3 N) |2 l$ W, t% ^2 {6 u8 p; g; c) D  Y
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
  o. D; B+ S* r" |9 k( v6 g

8 a& k2 v2 Z3 T9 l5 s+ G, t
- L" m. C1 K9 ^' b别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 4 U0 q) x) @# |, L4 t% |9 O2 [( S

) ~3 Q3 Y' t0 W; C/ Y/ }- l9 J; F- U4 @* m: o
8 }! K# v2 b, v
别把我往坏路上领啊。

1 F7 a% y, y. E) [你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
) H: P7 a: |- u" W加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
+ R$ _. b/ T, |6 j6 W! y
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 & y  s. q8 v8 a

7 R. c  {0 h  p. J' L5 U真博学,偶像啊。
1 S/ k: m3 `9 [: I
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 8 C/ I/ q+ Y4 M9 T+ \
/ @! U2 w- G& q. l
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

- T  c% l# A9 h8 u她是大学教瘦?1 H. X! o& ?2 G7 s$ o4 T9 |9 K
大学教胖还差不多 9 k" C2 f/ w+ A  v' j
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
: J$ Q* p1 L4 {( Z- x$ K- a5 L3 m8 Q紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

: O( l. O/ @' i* O1 R. D2 W说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
! ~4 L) ?& w: ]: q, z" e8 a0 \* X# {紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
/ j* C* X7 `9 H7 W
7 V0 U* \& q$ }7 h! c
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
大型搬家
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-4-30 23:45 , Processed in 0.311326 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表