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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
5 V+ t" x% C6 y; f1 j  N6 q5 F1 tlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
4 [" C- X7 \6 ]& o9 T9 xthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if8 F- [  w* F. S1 ]( E
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
$ S: O2 M9 K; W8 x  
4 f5 T7 u0 l7 ?* C- I& {# q The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so; g% p9 Y7 T. Y- V7 q
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The7 |3 _, S9 g, r' @: {
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I9 U: v# v- Z/ H2 ]5 v
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
9 I: V2 c/ _. @/ ?+ o9 ]5 F$ Jyou pay me only $5. , ~1 K  G. l" a

. P0 Z" _  w$ a, O3 I You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
4 y$ L$ T  x/ [' \) m: F) P will pay you $500.
& n1 w) O2 H  e: z- c4 T
- t2 c0 F+ N' O  d6 H; z. V This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
2 m# Q! ^  _* ~' r8 t( |0 rthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. + `' J, V. x5 s7 N

6 L, _4 I# I! s. FThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
! b& F/ c! x, F! Z4 A9 E. ethe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
  m# R3 N) H  C3 N$ t6 J  \* tpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the3 S1 N" V2 p4 C% ^2 h/ e/ G
lawyer. # j$ s' A: T/ k5 W0 L

" T( F0 q8 p( x) d' `Now, it's the newfie's turn.
1 }( ?! _* l. ^/ ^, M& r8 q; ]7 b/ m' s
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
/ }* {, j% I3 f; f* Mthree legs, and comes down with four?' + w' u( m0 F' ]; O. J
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all+ ^- S: Z! a; e6 z7 c% t
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
5 e: H- D+ f( p2 q8 I4 Rthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour8 s9 T5 y* i* F5 `
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
0 I7 M6 e# t0 D. R- m. v$ @hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right$ ~4 X: m$ Q7 I' R* g' V' q  R' z
back to sleep.
: x3 ^+ g9 z1 \+ b
& S4 r  s) W0 W6 W7 bThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He  p8 l8 q/ ~+ ]7 S
wakes the newfie up and asks, * |0 V) `, l( d# C

5 b6 P/ V- e3 i  h, N'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
6 J7 Z1 j! b+ s- i: b: Xcomes down with four?' 7 C+ l( T3 k$ }* {3 Q

8 W2 R+ z2 A$ h9 IThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5$ J" U( y( g) x
and goes back to sleep.- I7 w5 c. P7 R) `1 d; P. l

  ?9 Z% i' k& Y% e* a% N$ m/ J
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!( n3 y; l7 x# \6 D6 O7 N
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the% n: u  M5 Z1 |1 f

8 P4 E1 F% ^4 [. F  N% n" F0 Y+ J>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two + P  s5 Z4 J7 V6 p: A- q& p8 Y+ M
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
- A7 J3 R' P  y( x# |& f% B>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
( J; J& E- k  F+ u, _+ r* }5 r0 P>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, , c* U4 A. Q" W4 G5 N$ ]
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
3 P- }% f+ o8 S$ n& }( f2 D" W3 P$ G2 v3 @& q! f
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 7 q* z0 u. P; g( T. u/ i
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
4 Q! F# X6 f5 M/ r; f8 U7 e) a>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ' h% {* S. u) |9 y
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
& L, y1 V- @+ S3 O# C% g3 N>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
1 V! a% z0 _) a9 Z+ P' }
, K: `; M" R6 E$ Z- J# X>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
& p+ a5 ~* B- t+ L# E>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the , g% r' E7 x7 t" {/ \
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 7 Q5 h& A% _" A/ h. L0 v+ r
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
4 U# V" l/ g/ ~; ~A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
) g# f& ~. |2 A; P% S; glong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
9 z  \4 G# n: x2 Q9 Zthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if; w$ `* H- U- e1 H! L
the newfie would l ...
7 o6 C! n2 j) S! i3 `/ c$ j; u3 b

- v0 o" `+ K: P  _. @8 C- o+ r2 G
5 l& U. r  v0 S$ }6 h/ |好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:! ]6 Y, F9 Y5 b) N
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,$ C/ U7 ]& q2 u6 N" p
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ' s# c+ [9 U. Y$ Y. f0 A
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

: d2 H& B" T2 O; ^. E真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ' R4 T% k1 Z) q
# [, N0 d* i% y3 W0 d

- Z: x# z$ B8 M; C# Y# K- N: m2 U0 ]
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:, |( v' F* v: ~) f( d! ^
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,8 D: V7 M1 {. L6 ~! I
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

/ r* @( s" Z0 ~: u. I+ s; E; W1 r真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
7 k5 n' |0 {9 w: q
$ M3 f+ }4 g) O& I; n真聪明,偶像啊

8 H7 w/ f* f  \$ K  T; \, O/ C' Q$ i. E8 P8 n) e% j6 Q" |5 F3 F
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
4 G8 _3 F$ s) e8 _% s+ R& ]/ o  k
6 f+ E* l! o1 ?: J1 w
; V5 b5 |( X& b全盘接受一下。
3 B7 s; w, n4 D6 B8 N' u
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
, d& p' `$ j$ j  ?$ @( ]% U/ _# q2 c, t; C: [( ], C0 P9 r7 s' @' e7 `
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

$ O  U) N0 h" c5 Z$ S4 Z
: n  @: ^: x4 o& o% g% v5 I) B& o
( E1 x$ f8 {) R/ L4 I别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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, W2 X) e6 t0 g* b
3 }* d  b# c4 R% G3 r
别把我往坏路上领啊。
9 G. \% _0 _# b* w+ k
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
% O( C9 c3 ?7 Y, {5 F: H* Q4 t加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
- t2 v5 d+ j* J
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
' y- ?6 [8 f  }& s' p; ^
: H1 S1 Y. l. S+ `9 Z9 I$ f$ A真博学,偶像啊。
5 Q) v& w: u  e% {  v8 U1 b* H' a; W
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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. ?4 Q0 G: Z, H$ a大学教授哦,能不剥削?

  `8 H6 P( Y  {" C( o$ t6 k3 j她是大学教瘦?
  C: Y& K. J3 n  V4 o大学教胖还差不多
! g: P  g: k" Y3 [  G5 z& U她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 # J& `% I) t6 e9 i9 [* r: \
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

6 C: H! n' ]0 I4 s& c说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
大型搬家
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 % R( t; ?( X! M) U4 Z
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
0 k, v' D- V: K, }( k/ o
" @# B! }. ~. t: f+ `( |
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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