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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
# T# q  R- E4 g5 O7 Hlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
- N& B, ~0 L4 d  mthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if+ i- \) e5 ?) c3 r/ m
the newfie would like to play a fun game. 3 L  z  j& v+ x$ F. Q
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so/ C9 p5 c' h0 q6 v' L  Q
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
- `  r% L! J* y6 V6 J lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
9 E& Q4 ]8 \5 S9 o2 v5 K- `3 Jask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" R6 }) j: m, L7 P8 G4 j. Vyou pay me only $5.
" `6 l$ ]8 j; G3 h
4 F) }# d0 S6 o# V You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I7 ~: _! i  g& i9 I$ ~- Q& l
will pay you $500.
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0 G7 k+ v, x) y& y* t% } This catches the newfie's attention and to keep8 `) g/ }/ Q: ^' i
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
9 X7 b/ P3 f& Q" L4 N
/ {% B& T) F. ^. a: q5 YThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's1 @/ {% B  ?, I4 z5 I
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
$ m2 w* C% s/ P8 F+ A/ g
9 @, p, }: d5 K8 D% W+ R( V& cThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his% h: d% c+ Q0 @) j6 M1 P
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
9 Z( X: o1 z, ]8 V8 Qlawyer. 7 J9 M/ L% T* I) s- [6 a7 U

, @( Z$ e" w. ~; P/ R, ^Now, it's the newfie's turn.
& W8 s3 D8 u3 Z5 r* T$ T
2 F) u; x2 p$ R; G5 I- CHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
) D. ~, N8 R5 V# Z$ M0 Kthree legs, and comes down with four?' & D, M. _" P- V! S

6 V$ E5 N% ^: O1 iThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
" R2 {" ~( v" y7 t) x6 treferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
6 h; q) c5 |; Athe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour# I. c: \% Z, P
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
% ?" L% L: X- [6 }  mhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right! \; M( r% ?, g; B& L
back to sleep.
  Y7 k& M2 L4 K
. \6 \: Q: j9 ^0 k, \The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
  N% f' `, [3 \1 u( iwakes the newfie up and asks,
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9 N7 T2 x! o5 j$ b/ ~9 |'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
# h, u, E) @6 D0 U- F. _' g& Fcomes down with four?' 3 [6 |6 T1 V; h+ a9 q6 P  q& |( O

/ y: o. T; H4 x2 X; Z/ aThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
. l) s9 w( g0 J" b$ Sand goes back to sleep.; S8 B. {+ B8 W7 c+ u9 V( u8 A
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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- E( S* E' l  ~( uLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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* Z# t! f7 i( C# F) r2 o* E' ~& b1 ]>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
$ b' }5 n5 }7 z! V  P>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
# i0 |# j( i" ~7 J( @>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
; U( p# {! Q0 L/ \  Y( t>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, " v. w& L5 L$ f
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct+ f4 m* [4 q; B& i6 [
& `& U1 K5 O1 S1 \
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 3 n/ \2 {; L2 P' H+ Q- ~
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
# K% e: s2 d& i8 }" r3 O, `>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
8 D+ V* H  w! h+ p' t>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 8 V8 v' y" j% s; [; E" U2 j3 F) Y
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three' T! C: m, N6 n, ^& P
4 w' b4 ]5 S& ~5 A9 D  t8 N2 H
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
" R, [2 ~. |+ Z  O8 |>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
) p0 N3 n$ F+ @$ w# n9 [  b>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand , q6 C& x& l1 ?2 N, u
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 $ L2 f7 J8 ]; M* [& X
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
: I, F  r  M0 z/ c$ {; klong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
$ h' e: r5 }" ^that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& F: A/ p! V& c% T: G% lthe newfie would l ...
: ?1 X! s# V0 G) [
+ f* ]1 J+ {% ^4 o

+ x/ a" s/ @+ ?' p: U0 W" |好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
% P; }7 p4 f+ x, x" w! E- l) `“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,+ v, k% ]+ d' b7 e0 S' U
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
  ~! Y4 b$ z& p" M) U加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
/ J. m" K2 e6 R" L; ^+ ~
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ( h/ G5 }3 S- R4 L' `

. d* |8 C% {7 T. X0 I# Y7 @& D3 ]* r. a$ V
; b& x- f$ ~, U) A7 j; x* i& J6 F
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. \) c# |4 {! e5 G! N! i3 H“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
. ?5 ~4 J: Z' u* O* f5 t+ C4 s& Y: A好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
: i+ M  M9 x" Q9 Z) V
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 * t+ s- g! w: K+ K" |) Q( y, J1 E
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真聪明,偶像啊
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9 Y4 H, q8 n, D' o" U- r
全盘接受一下。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
: I- X0 W- I9 f- F- n# W. W1 z& @1 \( p2 J1 v7 s

2 G) m" l/ S. D! G5 J全盘接受一下。

+ r8 f) D2 i" u; d2 x7 b真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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; _; s# c5 g1 ~1 k+ S5 ]真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
; [4 A' E9 f5 c# y

8 e7 N: u) {2 f( c
+ d0 u0 m5 R$ |+ S+ W8 J别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 2 n6 A2 {/ E+ y

  }7 r; y! }7 a8 ]' k5 U2 Z( V" d, `) Y

, ^0 K! B$ g6 [! e" @8 N别把我往坏路上领啊。
9 Q# B1 ]6 [# M5 \, v
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 a" n* r* F2 ^# Q
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
" b- t$ V: P( A1 z/ @) f
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
% D: c6 ~3 f0 s5 Q5 U
3 Q; Q. Z. N! C% A! A9 }% K, V真博学,偶像啊。

) E( M7 ]3 ~0 j/ S; [3 ]% x* c大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
7 l4 H. N" Z3 t8 Z) C. a6 X7 a
8 F/ N& M. T4 S2 s, D5 C大学教授哦,能不剥削?

; i% e) [  z/ _她是大学教瘦?
. J4 k+ P1 r$ h' H  r" U2 H大学教胖还差不多
# {0 [9 I7 \" O# z她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ; s! q1 f2 s3 ^) E+ |8 N
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

; s9 V$ F5 D: y9 k8 _3 O. ~说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
大型搬家
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ) Q' e: D9 V7 C. N6 B* u
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
% _9 Q+ @+ U  v9 s

; h0 f) c$ U) R8 V哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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