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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a, F( J* y' D" Z4 {2 g, d' ^
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
! p5 \7 n; @7 `3 G* Sthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
5 t: Z: k" U! R; f  L3 Ethe newfie would like to play a fun game. 2 R* h  T! A- w7 e( {2 H
  
2 A' G' k. A( x$ s) @- i3 o The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so4 \# d/ A, I- ?4 m  j$ y
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The7 o) g/ ]. N4 k. }0 m
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
" o9 r( t5 p  L4 l, gask you a question, and if you don't know the answer," \" k! J% Y/ d- u  {; V
you pay me only $5.
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* R3 ~. y7 j# j5 x You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I! T" P3 _" r2 @$ |2 Q; \
will pay you $500. * N# C" J& Y2 s

5 }! Q/ ]7 A) z* M# ` This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
- l9 Y; K; V' [2 u! {the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 9 L- w; n; I; G9 e& m' w! H

3 b2 k, X, r, p2 D! J9 e. @The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
. Y, Y$ e5 A' d1 ^- Y3 dthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ) l8 U+ }- ~5 |8 S
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
( Q" `2 p  Y6 k0 t% \# Mpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
* z2 Y1 r" j+ w) Hlawyer. 0 y1 p4 c- z1 k8 ^2 a
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.7 ?1 G( j+ }+ @1 {
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with- @' z* D1 I( t2 U) x/ U6 j8 n
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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' B. y& @3 e0 P3 [The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
: B% p3 G2 K' a" Z( H5 Xreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
1 p+ r0 V! K3 l% F7 `+ W2 y) Uthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour/ r. Q2 X+ \. q
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and+ ]( e1 ]- g3 X8 d* K, `
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right3 P- u* m* q  b
back to sleep. 1 c. |( o2 e& O
2 B9 I- e# t0 I. G  k
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He5 D. c; H5 s+ i: V) m) V
wakes the newfie up and asks, / `1 A$ a7 |7 K" b) p+ Y: ~
8 X1 P1 l1 b0 A
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
8 K- M$ a0 W, wcomes down with four?' 9 i) A- ]$ e' k
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
% |/ P+ K; y7 ]and goes back to sleep.' U) S" ^8 X$ m( `

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!  f/ e; z6 a( e8 ~" f& c& s+ i3 H
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
, L$ f( K/ A0 U4 P- F! X( ]$ n0 ^! ^. I& U( @
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two & }8 u( v+ @# J1 Y
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
9 @, ~7 n( A4 A6 P# U/ ~>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
9 G: i' I7 Q1 W5 O/ B$ ?& Q0 H>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 1 n7 L, J% B! t
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 4 F+ E% R7 A# i, {, V
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 2 f: \% }: a/ q7 X' _6 Z' [
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 9 A2 i; l; C$ ?) U) s. w
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 4 f8 E* y' {2 ?4 I* Y( j
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's / o3 r3 w" J3 T2 u. m
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
( G/ z  u& c; c3 F>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
. J, C8 @8 B+ s+ l2 L3 N5 b>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 $ P* D) m4 U5 c; ]
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
  }! J9 l0 m7 p% Z1 }9 \% l3 _long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
  I/ ~5 i, A% Vthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if4 C5 I+ E3 V6 n/ N; A7 p# f# X
the newfie would l ...
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/ a$ b" F( U8 \* l9 ~1 P3 u/ U- A& C  M& P& ^
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ i- C& R! y8 W, Q4 Z+ s. m2 _: y5 P“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
0 J8 h/ U# [1 ^好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ( f, I, @/ {( _8 N3 }% P, G
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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, P0 a0 x  |- b: O" d4 {' Y' ?+ b) r) {/ E- N" a9 C

) `) {! i4 A; E  d好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:$ K2 [$ z5 ~( |, ]0 i, B
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ U$ B& X% I! T7 S. U好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

, a+ q1 O, Q0 o$ J; C真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 . y9 q7 z/ ]1 U3 t' f4 F+ b, o5 {- j3 a
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真聪明,偶像啊
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  C2 i) ~, c5 x! G9 `- X0 }$ }9 Q9 L全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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( Q% f; N9 V/ i" p* g% w" \7 q" Z$ s
全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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2 [. Q# h# p& ?  ~真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ! C3 y, I: I4 }6 j5 a% j/ o" ^

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别把我往坏路上领啊。

6 ~3 t6 }4 J$ o( X" ]你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ) A  `4 C: G! K2 o9 _4 P& U
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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  l( O1 d+ k6 T3 G; e7 C* w4 V8 F真博学,偶像啊。

6 s* V3 p! A4 N, ~大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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- e7 ^: G1 q' w( c5 C1 J大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
1 \, ~* H- V  P3 T" Z大学教胖还差不多
, k7 p6 v) {% F她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
5 }+ ]) k) I/ H5 ~紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
/ u9 o: B. f: s/ m' C, t紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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