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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
2 h; e+ g/ u' t0 V; ?long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
( k6 a7 ]$ `6 o% ?/ rthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if( T1 D" F% p: Y  w
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
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) L. O& _: s( X( I! a' ^) R The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
/ f5 m! f; h% ~# m he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
. ]+ ], Q+ [* }& s  x8 ]6 h lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
. P+ V* `* r' L7 b! r0 Wask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
1 |! l' n; @, `0 O5 {2 xyou pay me only $5.
' l  y3 A, c6 I2 S% R
2 }6 k; F# G6 C" }5 [8 f You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
* c9 m8 S4 a2 Z. t0 J+ \# L* i' ~ will pay you $500. . q$ ]! s8 }$ A4 \( E: G

4 r3 }0 f1 D6 m1 O This catches the newfie's attention and to keep  `; ]$ Q5 D: R7 R3 F  z
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
6 x& d1 O6 ~/ Z
8 e% N' |. ~% g9 [+ k: g4 t6 \- mThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
$ V1 [/ ^! M$ Cthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
0 s! Y/ r  o+ v5 p" jpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
0 d: y( B! P! f8 U* Y" b) Wlawyer.
1 s8 j& W5 g9 X" i" g7 B3 c- _
3 ?# V0 z0 J6 N7 a: cNow, it's the newfie's turn.
# ~  l  n% |/ P6 I, r1 q
: K# l8 D! m) H2 h7 u0 e- ZHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
7 {7 `: J. N5 y" \3 Qthree legs, and comes down with four?' & t1 d/ q. Z5 I5 D% A5 ~3 q

$ x7 `6 z: a8 x+ [8 b+ ?: J9 {The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all1 V: w/ H7 _8 j+ a8 h2 i
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
/ i* @7 A: i$ \the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
( K# ^9 I" Q, P& o5 x; tof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
4 l1 \! a% k7 G  M2 s& Q( x9 Rhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right6 w0 y0 ?) P* A/ _
back to sleep.
" r. c( A, U: m2 Q' J1 m! t' f
, X6 e1 R+ w$ {0 ]8 Q" _7 p9 pThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
1 A) V% r7 @" e: ]. awakes the newfie up and asks, ! z4 `) A. q6 m6 |1 h% B

$ v+ `6 F0 I; I3 D9 k'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
2 @/ M+ d* A! \8 M3 S% v" U9 Dcomes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
2 j2 W6 N2 z" d2 T4 }; I- i( P/ s8 Pand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!5 M3 f2 K5 N% X! `2 T7 S6 D
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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- ]! A# s0 D9 T+ R( J9 Q>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 3 v6 Z$ @# L+ ^$ \; N" [3 \
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
0 c. }0 I. \' ~>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the % x! k, R, a7 M6 [& @
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, : b, T/ I% v1 [  z' C
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
: |- R1 y! j) ~1 {; ]4 i; `8 [3 i, A# ?7 r* l
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
4 |# A+ X6 m5 F! @( \7 \; f>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a $ I) H: w* U; r7 L  y3 \& W) D
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more * F: h1 ^+ M& F/ e
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 5 r, k; Y1 A+ m' a. v/ R4 s
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
) Y' |% O5 R$ v# S8 Z2 D/ d9 L5 f" R& J( P) m  l4 b4 ?! B
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ) F3 j% ]. D1 W' C' N
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the . ~- y$ f; i2 V' o. h& u  M, |* \+ P
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
* R; D! g  D, @/ p>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 7 k- B$ ^  e; V) N! Q
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
& m! r1 O- h7 V! s2 _long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb  @! A+ e' a0 s6 W0 B
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
- m+ l9 R3 ?! l( f& ~the newfie would l ...

+ Y$ O' y( H2 \9 S. `
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好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:9 u4 u& V. W% I4 d4 P+ H, t
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,6 E' f$ w+ Q1 n# M& M+ b' m( j/ w
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 % S7 ]  A% R* ~  x; A8 S( @* M
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
, n; B* H1 R8 W5 D# ~" L- [
# [$ I. v) G& [3 _" ?+ `7 w# f  [% Q5 o  O( @

* u% G8 G0 ^2 M! W: c) U好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
# f' J: \' a( g$ {- {# E1 ^“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
% S' R: y6 o! k  S好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
! V; G' N; C5 T6 ?
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊
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' u! K5 l8 O+ [3 e, i8 {+ B
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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- u$ f/ d8 e6 V+ z$ }" G9 [! W  R6 E, ~: S! I& ?' _
全盘接受一下。
8 ]: r. v/ A" Q
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 / i; b& e. N$ z+ ?. Y" d& k, Y
! t9 P/ M: E) z0 Y7 c
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
5 @4 {8 C5 m2 D9 j. r! R

  u0 r* v( O) \8 m& z* G& h7 Z! u( N. |) r# M/ b: T
别把我往坏路上领啊。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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别把我往坏路上领啊。

' \; C" ]# {7 r# ~! H你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 # P) D  H# P: [0 s# ]# f+ O) L* p
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

5 w3 ]) o5 l3 `, Y, {/ Z多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 * U0 D! o$ T3 w; H: j$ u  i8 `6 a
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 0 X( n% N3 c# E, z) G) e
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

5 |- J, i" ^# f3 ?/ F1 y她是大学教瘦?
$ A* b% B% v# q) F9 A7 C大学教胖还差不多 $ b8 z7 F! L) t# r' R/ u7 W
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
. n3 M% c( F0 d' S; z6 s! g' V紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
2 [- u. L! K3 P  t- ^6 |紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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* W& `' |! p% ?
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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