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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
/ H& M: q6 o9 i% jlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
- B. G7 A3 r: }& H6 d/ Othat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
$ P1 ^( e6 `' ]3 ]1 f: g- M4 Qthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
! Z% F# q3 l6 B/ G7 |2 O he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The. d# o1 F7 \4 w# [$ {
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I1 ^8 b" J: K8 O7 @" W
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
9 d& w. e7 l3 N1 S  {you pay me only $5. . Q! k: a/ ]) V0 D5 ~2 ~

$ X" g3 \% y. @: r4 y% _+ `4 B You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
9 E; a, s6 l1 B: W. W will pay you $500. ! G1 Y2 j, B/ Q) F
; }1 @" f. o0 q7 x, j( Y
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
7 b1 p6 M5 I* K% Y5 ~- _4 Jthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 5 |( I0 B2 a3 `+ t" |- V* K, m
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
) u, n5 h; [9 R" Z0 W+ r5 ]5 {the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ) b4 r+ u! S$ F# l+ O
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his& n( n( c$ h8 Q( Q0 x. R
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the) K0 H( q/ {, X
lawyer.
& b- F5 {2 @  @( ^6 y
/ Q& c+ R, R$ _Now, it's the newfie's turn./ |3 L( \9 R  A- b
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with2 ^, ~7 e& Y( d3 ^& ?2 [
three legs, and comes down with four?' / h+ W) X0 E' z0 `

; t) d% z! t8 s, q  SThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
( [5 T0 z5 s6 c# Y5 |references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
6 ?5 U- g. _* Y$ U; U* k8 Fthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
# l) e1 `) |# L% s. Zof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
3 [5 c+ i& Q) y: ~1 T; \/ [hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right; a- c5 [' d1 h& f. Y
back to sleep. $ o8 ^9 E; K$ P$ q' ?
! p# w8 K7 i, d1 C$ k2 {0 @
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
$ p% N. D+ m4 t, S- Awakes the newfie up and asks, * V6 F5 R/ t+ P* A) J* D$ A  ?4 C
) x9 H! J0 _9 ]7 `3 J, }1 \
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
' D: \$ I8 {$ V, Z. i8 v' Zcomes down with four?' ! C& X. l$ {* ?) \% ]& d+ V# ?

% Q2 a2 i; K. kThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $50 H6 w4 y7 \9 V  B/ ?6 l
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
, ^/ F) U/ {4 P) p0 k; G/ v6 N0 k( J/ `7 ~7 D. h  V- G) u) k0 T3 S$ _
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 6 b9 i5 `( h4 K9 g3 Q
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
9 g' [* h* o6 \/ [) |$ ~! s1 F>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
/ s" c* D' O% Z( G  c( H$ N% v>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
7 U' v" j$ |: Y! l. y1 n- k% T" M>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct8 m6 R/ L7 q" y$ `* t( S3 b

7 L' i$ G6 P. x7 x5 ^+ q# W>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research . ]/ k; z% I. ]: r3 W
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
% F0 `3 g$ n! `+ \+ e>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 5 Z0 X2 ~8 f" y$ i# }6 I2 w* [
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
7 D5 M  W* v5 q  N5 z* B$ v( t>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three1 m6 m5 b0 v4 q3 m  _' y; y" \# C
5 z, \7 p8 ?5 \) L# `  t/ Y" r
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
* e+ n. C" X7 R>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
: @: c6 t+ e1 M% `>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ; k- ^7 G1 Q' t% j+ @9 }
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ! X" J! P% t0 `1 Z
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
( ]$ {. s  K' |long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
2 }2 X8 q& Z2 Q% t) Kthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if. e) C. ~! s, l& S, m$ s, |
the newfie would l ...

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3 b. Z$ C% K+ M/ H2 [# I
, D& @3 i! i! X好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
, Y' ^' I4 v  a“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,$ n" Q1 v5 [2 ^  m( Y; R  v
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
5 m2 ]9 Z+ i" ?& b  `3 q% h! h; E加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
5 U2 f$ f% p7 ?+ R5 J8 E$ Z& p
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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: `' R1 q; v" @6 A" k: B7 x) u' n7 j2 \+ N: j

- x8 a( B! [5 q& f+ w" @8 t* s好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:$ P* `- Q* E* [' Q* D
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
: F1 v+ @8 z4 D' G, E' f好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

! ?3 t; D. A; [& \. z- w, }: Q- T真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊

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7 `8 T: c8 T( W7 {) R全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 # o( {! M  p+ G, t9 r" j
5 L& i2 s" z$ y+ ~* V0 X. A
( j9 }6 g0 i" t/ V* F: a
全盘接受一下。

' R0 `* V% i$ @3 i1 B% d真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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# _8 m: ]! N8 S  G真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

4 i# A, S" [/ I& ^
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 5 S6 W2 {. e* o
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, l; i8 _$ k- p. P! T5 Y; `2 ]  B. q) I3 ]- E; a
别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 # ^( m$ C5 a, d6 B( U1 N$ w9 M
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

5 L8 `9 j. P" }% j1 g4 q& j# z多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。

+ Y! I: X. p6 ]" `大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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  ?5 x) K! \' }+ v0 v2 y, Z( w8 w1 {大学教授哦,能不剥削?

1 z9 `( L; V5 o) A; q& u% K! n+ }她是大学教瘦?
  D8 S" [2 J# v大学教胖还差不多
5 |! p# A+ W8 G# o2 _# G5 E她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 9 x6 T" A0 w  w" i8 E# K
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

1 {! p6 X4 U: l% H说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 " V+ O/ E- i  V4 g2 h
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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