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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
  N" i3 l8 b- W! j; Wlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
0 R8 E8 V( F  J- \: m5 mthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% d6 H# H) x  K. h: `8 y
the newfie would like to play a fun game. 7 s' M1 Q3 X- ~" V6 l# Z- X
  
" }' ]# u1 W% Y The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so! t$ i9 l4 l$ N' |" l/ i
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The' i0 z/ `$ y9 w. {# C2 l" }
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
$ O* e. m; ^2 Q5 b$ U" ]9 P5 Zask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
9 J* c9 ]) a% a+ B3 [- kyou pay me only $5. ) P+ K0 @& t  I1 u* i' P. o* L; Q

  s% S* _6 [9 `: m. a2 @( R You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I) M: ]5 \( x5 D7 ]# s* L
will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
, b/ L( X; ~+ F3 m. @+ H/ d7 Nthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
2 ^! u) w* d& X7 C! h( D. V( _' ]! s/ }: ]. g( g! t. v8 Q% g& B
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
! D( ~9 @" s5 r, D6 A1 Tthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ( W8 D# f, L& U( t) s6 D. U
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
2 o* _: S& u2 \4 U6 m3 _% tpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the* G4 q% m0 k" _, z1 {) E, }
lawyer.
/ M' i0 e: X; a3 b; A
. ~% H( k+ g6 pNow, it's the newfie's turn.& `$ f. j9 _: @- I8 c6 m) d
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
' c7 [% v) Y; e5 {/ ^3 q1 Lthree legs, and comes down with four?' & v. d2 O# d% b0 |, h
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
+ L& i% Y4 _: w/ Jreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
# X5 u  k# D0 N1 V: P% vthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
0 o" S$ m7 W+ v8 p. l% dof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and1 T& p, T; p- c4 C  m7 {2 t! `
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
7 u+ l' g% e0 z' A4 K' B1 L4 Dback to sleep. 6 W- y9 v* D  r# _' x$ g# F4 [- j
% B# f1 F0 X) `( y
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
( w! j$ P0 K& v8 w# C( ewakes the newfie up and asks, 2 t) G( ^" r4 E, W. s4 v& F% G% O
; H6 U  ^" F5 N/ i3 o: e3 C: ]
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
/ \; y! Z* o  ?, B: Icomes down with four?' ) M6 M4 ]# N5 D0 w+ P, K' H0 Z& A9 {
+ c  [, A) F/ N  g/ U
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $51 C4 M$ R  l7 ^# W
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!6 e0 J2 S5 ]3 N, S; |
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
6 O( U" f5 z2 D9 `3 z9 a0 g
9 _) n7 U8 Z( G( i1 y9 Z3 ^" n>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
( Q) V5 q: b9 `. V2 S: C>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
- P2 m* ~8 {4 [# z! \* b+ ?>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the . x! ?- z9 m3 L& M: m( V
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
7 S/ N4 r( Q9 ?3 G6 Z. D>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct5 S. {& F/ V; p
! P' L# Z, G8 H) p6 Y6 V" `
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 3 t9 U, ~) J" s
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 5 ?2 K7 ]6 H7 t& ?9 S" w. b  ?, g
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
$ k" x; ]9 [; R2 t, i4 F: D$ k>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, , F) @; s2 h! E* |4 J! r
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three4 ~4 d3 B' l" w0 g
6 }. ~! }, ^8 h5 O4 p; h1 k2 A" A
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 5 F, ?4 c1 J; c3 X
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
' e& }- C9 c$ O8 U: Y  Z* D* e>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
9 l; J8 g. B" V# m4 S; e>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
, F( s6 T; I7 ?6 k1 s6 p, TA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a! ~+ ~0 V% \; C
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb+ j8 E  q4 Q  P" X" V8 F/ K
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if# x7 B. A/ c; Z4 d% f
the newfie would l ...
. [% S* {% z  `! k6 J) q& q+ e5 ^
2 f1 P2 A" T3 }/ J" z
2 r) \8 f0 @* |) M7 ^0 r$ u
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
9 a' \3 K. T: H6 z# v“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,- v) t1 N. j. h: j  z% {
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
. ^" b- n9 H: o4 q. ~3 @! S加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
0 X! @9 r0 x$ d
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 4 V1 \# j' [4 E4 E( Y$ @
. h/ I% \3 y2 E/ V

- k9 D, G5 R) q% `6 L# }, |9 o! t1 N; [" P" x% D, x) u
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:, [5 z2 H: ?9 \8 C! v" ]: W
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
8 ?* Z2 l3 s# v$ n  w1 N) C7 Z好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
2 ?3 W% Q2 o$ ^% t* m
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表   ?3 ?. m7 S- z  \& @3 h- c* q0 Z

# l& [0 O7 m& [: U; X, }9 y真聪明,偶像啊
; v$ L# a, }% \/ Z/ R' b$ g

' V2 \# }4 E2 B5 r. s* {6 R全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 , C: v. H1 m9 N4 t$ ?! f- [0 ~

2 ~$ _# P9 P/ H) E
5 l' C5 w$ r0 W  Z全盘接受一下。

. l* e) Z; K( {8 O, f2 _真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表   X, ]# V; y# g$ B/ ^

8 ]& ~; P5 I6 m; X6 ?0 R真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

( u3 \0 z  g9 l6 R3 o* B7 i- P. B4 W! X, d$ a0 E

' P2 l# {+ o$ a$ P; o/ q1 i别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
$ ~+ ^3 b3 K; m) Z6 V/ w. |8 @3 w2 B
0 x; X) v; ?. J% D1 k2 W% j1 D, h" C+ c& p; N5 a

, P. ]% P; d' X' T3 Z: l. [0 W8 A别把我往坏路上领啊。

" b. I& I5 o, Y你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 9 f5 h; B1 e" i) L, @1 F
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 % c' L) `6 h- {" d" `! ~; F/ \

$ o, J* w3 q3 h' z- r# D$ [真博学,偶像啊。

% t) m; p/ P  s9 d: _) Q( ]) s大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
2 X' c- D2 k7 e, ], y/ e) ~# y$ W/ g) T+ g1 j" _" l
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
0 E- O  G/ d  h, e& `大学教胖还差不多
8 @6 v2 \9 O, l/ Y7 P# F4 G她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 9 a1 X2 V& @, F8 ]: E
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

( R0 z% q4 Y, F说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 7 B" `/ r. X4 _1 h6 f! u$ Y  [0 Q
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
! G7 k0 {8 j4 D3 k2 x% t

) @, R8 B" [8 M# P哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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