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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
# t* F4 ~7 ^4 Y4 i& y' Flong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb& \! H$ g" b+ O3 N0 B
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if/ ]9 s/ Y7 s7 |+ |: h
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
' N2 Y5 c# y( W+ J# l5 Z- |8 E. M& J  
2 q2 ]$ m) t( v The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
- z+ [; _8 x5 B( |$ ]* b he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
( ^, V0 T* R1 k' L lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I5 _( K6 S( C# B% I4 j$ p
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,9 j" V5 `9 l; n
you pay me only $5. 7 o3 C& b# b8 Z) M* V+ w& s( h! v6 Y

$ W' N! {, q% g# [/ T# u0 H; y& s! N You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I2 ^  M# |; J( D; l
will pay you $500. 1 E! q- g% X6 H) I

& `7 O# T0 p# U; Y/ e6 r1 E( ]: e& Z This catches the newfie's attention and to keep' v7 ]7 V9 [7 g' O
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 6 \9 z" c  q5 v8 y) ^# c6 s

8 y; I0 {' c  U3 y. FThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
* O/ Z  I( P7 q* ~  J8 B7 [( A2 t) Cthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'   V" U4 U; C; ], U5 D2 h  `# _" B
8 ^& ?& U5 {. I, D4 |
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
4 o8 W5 f3 T9 l/ opocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the& F. y; K6 p6 V! o" H; [# S% L
lawyer. " H, T: [3 K4 \) Y7 N, F/ |) j/ K
/ }6 v: U2 u, f8 v
Now, it's the newfie's turn.( s3 m6 k# k: z' ]+ c

1 X( Y( W- H) R1 p+ ]) X! L7 sHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
  Q) B2 [' }. m' o4 hthree legs, and comes down with four?' - q- A6 w" I1 t$ e0 v' I/ ~
2 _. u1 I$ B( ^  L' {" d+ H
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all/ \8 K( ?/ |* n+ M7 C8 |3 j0 h; C
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
* S+ G) V0 j5 `8 n4 ^the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour5 X! k9 S1 h" v( A
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and; }5 J$ V8 y: @' w# K
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right$ C9 `6 e5 d8 |$ B! |- |; r; `
back to sleep. % A3 O5 z- D9 W7 p8 f  D% V4 d

4 w% A) Q- I: B* I( ?3 FThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
. g# ^6 |1 G% Z& P/ lwakes the newfie up and asks,
8 a, [2 y4 o  w" x2 }7 {! L5 R; J( b
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and  e2 m* p7 I+ l# m
comes down with four?'
4 `# \$ p! E7 ~. ?: B, W" Q- M9 u! o+ [, \8 E9 K0 p
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
$ @7 A0 L: C8 h4 s" T, g9 h+ r: q. c% oand goes back to sleep.# Z8 [9 W! z# V; }, D# o% g

. F- K" O: _: B$ E' A, d1 T
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
! @9 [4 ?/ ^* S3 M2 w$ v# W& t. m1 h7 s
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the9 [  a+ d* s4 Z6 U: h: Y) s
* @- b9 h) d; m* V. d6 v
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two   T% C6 p$ H% v9 d8 J9 W9 q
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
, W& R) g2 {3 ]* O>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
& [/ j% ^- g' R1 t>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,   [* ^; I; `( l0 v. ^! |
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
: D. W/ c- \* p) K% \) }# `* \" H0 l+ E1 G6 U" J* t4 h' n4 p
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
6 d0 l( ?5 q) p( N: Z3 I8 ^, ~>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
8 c; j+ w3 W* m$ K! Y>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 8 Q! f" |2 o8 f4 W
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, . X7 X& y$ S" u- i
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
9 [: v' {4 |$ m. [7 [
) p5 V& U3 y% w4 X+ I$ \- ?$ C4 _. y6 z+ r>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
/ [# Q( f3 h+ d0 H2 V! A>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
5 d3 ]- Y! x7 t, L>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 0 P- E) X1 p% d8 T
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
5 O4 Z/ p! `( H3 fA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
3 Y0 g2 m/ h+ M3 K9 L) ^! Vlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
/ {6 v! n3 @3 _$ G3 K6 q/ Kthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if! g/ r# P) Q0 F4 P. u4 [* c/ P' K
the newfie would l ...
% v/ ]! x: p9 z" Q7 D- l

2 {  O- F4 B. |& G% n# x) \3 s+ N8 }3 Y' a7 l1 X0 h
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:6 w. W: W- P' e' }
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,5 \7 t/ {# V2 P; ?" f: V* m+ I: X
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 6 i- r+ X4 y, }( j8 \
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

* f. ^: E6 ^: A( `8 f) m) b# E6 j) p- z真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 0 u: J: X2 T  _" [

3 u/ N! I# L& ~4 q4 x
3 u6 J8 ^6 v6 C  G. k* O% j/ `/ D) X5 c) j
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:1 m0 W0 s1 @0 R/ M8 y2 w& F; D
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
& y6 i# r# H( S, o好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
& h: u8 `, `4 y
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
3 Y+ D# _5 N9 g* j/ Z2 n
( l* Y7 c+ X2 a2 g( m真聪明,偶像啊

3 V7 q! e6 M# @7 d, p/ b
1 E2 k2 [" c  V' N2 J' w3 r' ~全盘接受一下。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 1 e& i- e# `; N7 U- \. }  e8 z! F( E
' A  F1 N# C; A) ~$ [# R( \; ^

5 e9 {+ p; W7 y& [3 `$ Q+ O全盘接受一下。

( ]' R) ~' M: \- D! Z9 |真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 " G2 @/ P, n( _4 p. H6 g6 A

, O8 V9 y5 b8 e+ \: t: f真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
' H7 t5 S! K, y8 F- f0 M0 _

' Y8 D  Z7 w# @7 c4 v$ P6 Z1 k
* _9 K/ N. V, i3 _1 g4 C6 t别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
, ]# n# H6 X- L9 t& c- {
6 A5 t- \  D2 H. }- o5 O
3 a, d/ w, Q8 m) u  ]
5 r: w7 s0 D4 P* M7 f' ]7 I& n: e, }别把我往坏路上领啊。

9 `/ s+ D- ^5 ~" F: q( b* v5 _你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
( C3 c/ ^! b" d0 C) x. e( q" M加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
5 u$ Z. }6 U2 \. ~* e" W/ D
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
2 U+ r3 k# t' P! w) E# T
: y/ S- m2 y1 e0 X  p, ?- U: J真博学,偶像啊。

# i0 u) f- n5 R5 T0 d大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 " U/ o- j2 q: \8 f" o" W( @+ c$ X

+ D! h8 c9 G4 d3 C4 f大学教授哦,能不剥削?
- d! m1 U% g2 L
她是大学教瘦?
+ o. t0 A; b+ S1 M$ l( B/ }) |大学教胖还差不多 # `  W0 n' e) k5 I2 L/ f) V* {5 I
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 6 T$ Y# p) {5 @/ f& a8 R' c) X4 ^2 a
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
* Q' ~5 @1 ]- k7 m0 t- p
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
. N! W0 X  \* W* f3 t0 o& Z紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

1 C2 Q3 F: v& W' o, t' E' \# y# l# r- {, l' e
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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