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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a+ M. z9 F; v" }
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb" w) r1 e6 O( X# H
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
+ T; @3 |6 U3 d1 A9 t' o! I2 z* dthe newfie would like to play a fun game. ' Y$ G, R5 b. t, z! F. ]
  5 P' B; ~! A; d4 J* u. y
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so9 n9 t* K$ y+ g) Z# D
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
% e2 ]! R8 @  _" F4 O5 }- N' |; N lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I' z3 d7 \1 s; w8 r; @  L: O
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
9 ?+ P8 x; _2 d* [$ V8 z! @8 ^/ Fyou pay me only $5.
/ T% ^: U( K6 j! z9 A( h + e% \: h+ d# }( E6 }, h  }; a7 H
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I0 j0 N; [  {; x$ Z
will pay you $500.
$ y8 |) u' Q9 R& y
# I  E; |  H- }2 G+ j& l+ b0 ]6 J. ~% a This catches the newfie's attention and to keep; q3 D4 C. _. `8 S% `2 K5 \, Q9 G
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
% _8 _$ c* |( Q
  X: |( R7 `) eThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
2 B8 y. p; [. l& |: m) f! X$ Othe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' $ D( S; L/ M% p' p: y7 o  O0 M

  Y- n6 J. M0 J# U$ QThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
! e$ \+ Q' n) l) xpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the/ |0 {% G2 A$ n# s/ }" L
lawyer.
4 a9 e* u, g4 v- w# a; t
* h2 @0 m6 G6 TNow, it's the newfie's turn.0 p3 m1 }8 c  m# \8 h* N

4 I2 v) d) g* c3 l* oHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
. Y6 I6 K) _9 W% s/ M: r7 i; n1 mthree legs, and comes down with four?' 7 I" l5 s( N6 z

8 y7 N1 F# ~( k) m5 V6 _The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all8 W$ B; B* i+ u5 R  ^5 _" T  }
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
' ~( t7 h6 U/ n* q- \6 P% [" p, [  Qthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
* Q: m6 L/ u+ @* o6 a; B; cof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
4 q8 P5 \7 D, z; ?  ^8 B" zhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right/ O; o2 P) B7 q) T  r* u3 Q0 V
back to sleep.
2 _) B8 U2 V+ }( Z4 H& g' V' K2 _0 A$ M5 n
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
& k" {4 B4 F* R* Awakes the newfie up and asks,
' S+ i% b4 @* Q& ~3 ]
+ a5 ^' ~7 J! w'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
7 A* C  I7 G6 Jcomes down with four?' ; W* i) q  M$ e% F/ b% L
) _5 L/ ?6 g' Z
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
7 O8 ~/ T# ]4 p4 Oand goes back to sleep., [# O  T& J0 R" P

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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, b2 ]4 t6 E7 z3 H/ q/ }4 }" _, aLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the! O& }4 M" L3 U0 V  S# s% |7 i. D4 ]
6 |5 q$ U8 |- o8 P2 ?8 Z. [
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 4 B/ ?( b5 B3 n0 W% [- H
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
4 I- j9 t) K& i) k>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
  @7 O' [; Q; Y>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
0 b- F' f- P/ A' x3 T* _/ K>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
9 l* u3 b3 x( e+ |# j8 X6 f6 a
9 L# o$ O+ z) x" I. a/ @1 |; {>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research * {' h* h* Q, b/ ~& y
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 5 Q3 f# K; d, ?; Y
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
$ f# n0 S0 b4 c& @>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 9 _% g+ i4 ~1 V. l
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
5 U  ~' U8 l1 ~& |  h) [* m& s  @" J" Y! C7 c
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
( w+ l( K! j6 r6 m* x: n>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 8 d$ ^0 {: `% L7 w
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
6 a: S6 f0 f* \) ~6 \  X>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
& O8 |( C+ R8 }8 |" KA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a$ Y9 G& ]0 n' l" A5 V' t
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
$ U5 |* w  s( |: Sthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
  I3 z" N  `# M0 Tthe newfie would l ...

4 s8 H- u4 ^4 s4 F
% G9 X* R! o& B% Y: g6 Z0 J6 ]# e
0 o2 e: z+ t8 b, x; y8 N好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
9 [$ {  s" \5 [; r7 {) ]  s“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
8 L0 U. H) q6 @1 W1 K7 n- v好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 5 H( b$ L6 M2 D/ t' {1 `
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
1 ?& j( I  `3 a, a2 ~5 Z% q) x
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 / i6 }& I6 Q. K
4 K# Y' d0 `9 d7 F

8 V( Y( E+ S, Y! Q6 |! H* u7 T, x# P- y$ u
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
3 M: I* K+ o: o; ~$ v# k“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
; s/ d8 @/ r9 T+ N, S5 L好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
% L1 U3 [2 f% E% M" J
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊
! D, e! c; {0 W" K1 H& O6 g

' I: u3 Q4 N1 Z. R) }0 i全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ' u. C  ]( T7 f- \1 u# Y! B
, F) t, W& f$ c8 S* `- Z, ?

. s' Z% J$ M* Q: Q% ^# \8 o全盘接受一下。
- v! s- U% i& @) k; F! ?0 c
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
) Y! |  L7 K9 ~6 ]
2 U8 E" }( M) p. ^  k, n真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

* d) d  D+ a; k0 x6 [1 w; P' c
+ Q2 ^* X! C; |: [  p4 E% u1 u3 ^- }2 I1 @0 S1 C6 o3 f9 \
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
8 j5 K; a$ d1 l7 h
/ s- _4 q$ \  G# |- \9 Q9 W+ X' R
: |6 D6 P# Y+ `
4 x8 B0 k4 i  V2 o0 D0 R" z* o别把我往坏路上领啊。
/ m/ Q* B3 P; ?6 [" \( F
你已经在路上了
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
9 O6 U  ?8 u% n加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

- h8 j/ O6 u5 b多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 * d" V- }5 I2 V. C1 }

4 [; [& I2 l: ?! B真博学,偶像啊。

9 n! s) t' Q6 ^6 S! T: [: ]8 g大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 + u/ C  k8 m/ Y# Q$ z

3 C1 `; F5 ~  R$ \! s大学教授哦,能不剥削?

0 |; w6 Z/ E6 _7 U" t5 b她是大学教瘦?, ]' f6 F: G2 |6 Z. A
大学教胖还差不多
0 i1 h# L0 J. K她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
  e0 G! o* i. j$ N3 u紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
8 j) V" N% x* a+ }& [
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
& ]# j8 C2 @+ b, ~6 \9 `/ i紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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