埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5188|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
, B' ^/ @, L' K6 M0 slong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb+ M! R- S" `& t1 S
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
, K8 B" f, S8 m; E# i8 E; c, z, hthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
8 Z: U+ o5 p* j5 y; a' A  , V2 A9 A3 t; p5 F( G+ g
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
6 ^8 \7 H2 N/ Q+ t& z' O4 b* d; } he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The3 \1 N7 W* [3 `8 d8 O' J
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I+ J7 k% C6 A, T7 Q. i# o$ g3 r
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
$ v2 D  P5 H8 R! w) ~' J1 cyou pay me only $5.
4 ]. W- W. q" Z( B& u 7 y. i( b. d2 }  W9 p  r! W" }
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
; p) R: f/ K; r5 {1 j will pay you $500.
+ |0 r" N' I( x% E& y! s9 ] . J; w- ?! F8 _, w
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
! N" [/ H0 Y/ K% @0 Mthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ' @3 c+ A  ^% q. [, V; u: h

0 W% F. m+ ?+ b) Y& v' H9 sThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
5 J' h' i7 k8 b" d0 O! U9 sthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
) n% v7 z2 U% |
( R+ D2 S8 H9 Y# H6 f9 pThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
2 h% n. L' G9 N) H- e: u, ?0 e7 q. }pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the' O3 c& S0 B( |! B0 o
lawyer.
7 l+ `1 x$ D) A& c8 U
& F! U+ V, A' I9 k) R% UNow, it's the newfie's turn.0 b! G, U4 b5 A+ u) s0 ]5 Q  ^

; [/ A; s  V% B6 k$ [6 u1 QHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
0 |# ]5 U+ w+ [- T5 Rthree legs, and comes down with four?' - \5 x& L3 n- b4 O
- ~5 U6 C6 r6 @! e2 Q  [& p
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
. a# _* Y) y( g% B, breferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
( f" V6 h  _. M! z. Y, }2 Cthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour, ?& h7 Z  p# |% T; W1 z7 R
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and" D0 d# a( U! y# A0 Q/ N
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
' S- ~0 n' _" l6 ~9 ^4 Mback to sleep. 5 H7 m* _4 K) ~5 ~

! }# x* l- Q1 hThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He$ u: K# G. T% ~, a5 A# P
wakes the newfie up and asks,
' R1 p; L) H% U6 m: m: X5 ~6 Z/ e
. |, Y! C# |, u( ^' b6 s'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and9 Y% N! v8 ]9 B& P
comes down with four?'
) w! \; x' N5 ^( W. S
! k0 e6 A9 l+ @0 g  }8 I: G2 JThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
. B/ n4 [  l2 J! L( L( `; jand goes back to sleep.
* \+ J. H- I6 I+ P& I
: L5 k8 R5 ^' Y+ n
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!, w5 a  }6 i' n
, t) |' ^( |7 Z+ @1 z' \1 [
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the3 o( }) X9 R( U4 a& W7 W- Y
" L6 _: w7 J' v% I) q: Y
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ' T+ Z% @0 `4 |
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
! E+ Z* d4 \3 i>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
, o3 H& o6 D/ W>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
. }' Q3 A  ^9 n& v: M  f>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct- x$ J  _$ [1 ^$ {  m9 S- `) u5 j
) f6 k0 I9 F# m' R
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 0 h' z1 F/ T5 a9 [4 A
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
; _" p* V. Q2 u; M>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
% I" N0 w" y) T3 ^3 ^* X/ I>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
. v. ]! H% A. S+ U2 Z, f>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three% }" _4 f1 R' w8 ^- S) V

3 D6 d9 l2 u" c>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
$ K! k$ |& Q6 |>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
9 i6 Q4 n8 H: ]* w$ t* s* u>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand   n- x  J" @$ m& A8 K* G& V0 }
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
' F, H% \; ?$ NA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
# v& @/ ?) G  }, llong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb5 o: C4 J: C! O& n$ r: b& f
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
0 T1 q  G1 a6 |: g# }1 M# ~3 W8 G% ~the newfie would l ...

0 U! a5 R; q8 q1 X, v
. h! a; s: T  J  `' g8 m! K( E2 i) K0 F, I" A
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:1 q" n' h$ N& o! w) Y3 [9 }3 |
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,- @1 _* w, R5 [; t1 B! Y( D
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: W5 t* q; H; _9 i加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

$ O8 D( T! [2 ~7 W+ t: s真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
8 M4 H2 A" H6 N5 y
2 ~- D8 n, X+ g) w! [+ M; y6 n
. T% f( w/ u: ?9 P* O2 q4 X" f" j8 @+ ^6 u( M- U( D
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:* w- u+ m! v; ?  n
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
% ^8 ^3 |' {# f! `0 U! E+ b" }* S8 I好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

" a% X8 X& u* a3 l真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 , f7 Z- s$ ?  U, H1 ~4 L
6 ^. W. z2 G4 X
真聪明,偶像啊
" D7 x" [  e8 D
5 l* s5 |& P# U+ `2 z
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
% H. I' K2 I* E3 ^5 m
4 @4 n9 F) O+ T0 z
; i/ w! j3 [( a* ~! l全盘接受一下。

! z( y" Z# E2 ?4 z" Y/ E真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 & m1 d  N- g- u* `# f

: _2 r8 w- z& O$ _  {) M- x真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
" I& C! j4 I# k( w5 w  i8 n

% R) J' C4 s& m1 U# L) S) J% ^( `1 L+ @- Y5 c
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
2 x8 l& S. B; y$ s$ E6 q% p5 z; @) ]% D/ c- e5 X- w

' I: ]7 u/ n( Q/ P% {( ?1 Z3 `9 f) I
别把我往坏路上领啊。

6 z$ ]2 \" ~7 K* i; l' j你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
# Q0 ?0 Y/ S$ I/ W; o加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
+ Z& `- \  B1 ^
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 : I5 z9 {- x% N0 w* T
; d/ |* ^" {2 l- j1 ^' x/ s& l0 S/ T
真博学,偶像啊。
0 g  z5 d0 n9 k$ F6 S# u
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 . H$ {6 a6 \8 H2 `2 R3 m* N
& c( [$ N' _6 a, b
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

8 i  V3 J$ c; V" B6 {. @. ~! O她是大学教瘦?6 }8 v4 a5 o& d
大学教胖还差不多
3 O. l& k6 c5 z1 J她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 . y$ c, P; [- T5 s" t3 ?1 E& m
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

( Z# p3 O# V6 ]* W1 Z8 _说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 " K% r( w, T; O' k
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
9 ^2 M7 p) z! |7 T# S5 o  z

1 s& }* ^5 U. H" s; V$ j哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-4-26 23:51 , Processed in 0.291466 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表