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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
" S1 e6 b3 d/ _, D! h9 I& rlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb0 W, |. B4 h7 i+ u; x5 `: G; m
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
, ~5 E- f" A5 r1 bthe newfie would like to play a fun game. ) Z. @, O* \1 C, C5 q9 Z; h& P
  1 W2 o( j/ n: k  B5 D- O- A
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
5 j# t* y# A, O" c! o3 E6 w9 `! t he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The/ h5 a* y7 s5 Q) U  I6 a
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
$ m* w, P7 c6 I" L0 |ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,& a" }* N  N0 e- p2 z
you pay me only $5. 3 G" X+ Y8 Q" e. R2 Y7 E
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
4 t2 V2 d( S: L) E will pay you $500.
6 t  v9 g+ i9 W- P
8 N+ M/ {+ C/ `+ O+ D3 | This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
  e5 b$ K# v( C) k' G( zthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
$ W: s( |4 a. w3 r; k9 C
; k- W8 X3 ]* I* JThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's! r/ p/ l( {$ y6 p& k
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' # l- n/ ]1 }% G

- O# z* P' @, n! _+ k4 p' TThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his9 @! r' i2 }# U, ^8 D5 \9 Z
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the  A9 }4 D$ W% i; e. M& ]0 J' \
lawyer. ; J. q1 V6 @' v! [+ B6 p9 Q  W) R& U

& W: s: ^5 n$ {" P, WNow, it's the newfie's turn.
9 g& l3 G- |( o. o' s. t( M
+ U9 g) ?& ], |, Q0 [" ^& j% `1 h! zHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with3 {' F/ \/ W; X5 \9 H. ]
three legs, and comes down with four?' $ h9 h" g' W3 M& w' l( d9 k' D3 _
% O2 Q* H, Q- e( r/ O9 t6 k
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all0 @- V  [' n& E# u- F% W, L8 Z
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
( Y/ K! d  \0 a! ]1 _$ @the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour$ B& J5 s" N9 |7 {, _
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and& j5 b, d7 w0 o( B8 d; c( ~
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
9 O# |: }+ ^) ~4 {% Q/ cback to sleep. & h: U0 k/ o- t( `: x0 e3 t* Y

3 g6 W1 O1 J% H. Q9 h9 aThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
/ D% o8 M- |7 x: `# Y  Cwakes the newfie up and asks, ' j* N* ?: z' c* A
# ]- ]0 ?/ H7 u: C
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and' `2 g, E. p) j/ Z
comes down with four?'
* k" q1 \, x  o; S. z" J2 ]; X; r
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
4 u( v0 ]4 l( X% p$ ]8 fand goes back to sleep.
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+ i8 C) N8 j9 v1 h: j
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the0 H) U" M  c& k* d: S7 e( @$ v

! q, ]! ^: \* z/ `% V" _>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 4 T0 I: h2 g/ W- N5 A! y
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
/ s/ Z5 Y7 p, [6 C>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the & j' N, [" A2 m8 ?
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, / i) E- Z# }2 a
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct- c$ S: G! O% }7 B4 o

0 `" z" ]6 l; ]>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research # U  N6 i- B) p7 F2 j) d( D( D' b
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 9 K* w& ~  m9 I
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 5 U! n5 u1 x" @  b1 ~, W, l
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
2 e" i* Z& P& F# M" U# |6 A. @1 z>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
) b/ k8 c: _$ e- E" ^' W
" q) q) |5 N; j" u- R. j>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
- j) F2 @& Y& `- V>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
5 z4 ?& V% l: I$ S: Y% h  l' e2 {6 S>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
, F; E0 I. ~4 G>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
' n1 K+ f) ^3 N4 KA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a1 V1 S. [. o1 p( ]$ }8 B
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
1 ~: \/ }' k, b& ^3 s8 ^that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if/ [, {7 s' q. t/ t, u
the newfie would l ...

9 _! [% S6 ?& `+ A) a5 g
) C, e' K1 N$ M2 K
! ^9 `0 @) n+ i5 h( p好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:) y# L0 w2 T( F5 [) a5 k0 q
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
7 k" k; W1 ~! V9 f* d% M好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ( c0 J8 ~6 ?8 Y" T) ^
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

  p; q; @6 _; b4 t. I真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 7 D) p* `4 \( l# ?: q# z
3 g1 h  K4 h1 Z, f6 a

- O1 B# a; n( J6 j) u3 ~* S/ y0 ~0 t0 ~6 k, {* z! v. J
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:& `2 E, A  q! `, f
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,$ R; I1 j4 ?0 D' N4 i( j" s
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
5 d( z. ~+ A4 o% e+ r& b
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
0 I& g1 c8 D$ |( p9 m
1 M& s" X" F9 d  g5 x: Z1 K真聪明,偶像啊

# X$ Y! `9 e; b  i5 M! ]6 h* w' a: z* P8 p; J
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 / ]8 L0 y1 i6 C4 f8 o$ [" S
, Z; E/ a& e4 L& J% g8 z6 E( Z, j  j

: l8 O: i5 N/ w; `& L, g! f全盘接受一下。

9 _: c  J/ V- e8 ]4 Y真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
# n' t% A* m+ p+ |; q; a% }* i: U, R
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
2 e( [: D; S" L( D
$ ]* F# Y; S  e; p
9 N7 F1 J2 L$ B6 o% {
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
& g" \( s4 h  b8 K8 G( ?' |. e9 v8 a( w6 c+ \& f' a3 a. p2 u" p
, @. \$ }; D0 b8 N4 s  H# ]  ]
! ^  J/ ^) u  _
别把我往坏路上领啊。

$ l+ f" w, w: g* H2 _6 O你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
% x# S% h5 `% C加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

0 v( U9 G/ R% d; ]' P: [/ V& F4 O& T. u多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
: ]2 I' h  L* V3 T' Z% y$ p1 C: U. h2 |6 F
真博学,偶像啊。

6 p4 }6 ^5 c- |% Y& I大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 2 c; o/ I3 E3 Q! F" ?& C) N

3 g2 V  q" [, k- `; s9 Z1 y8 }' f大学教授哦,能不剥削?

2 i( N1 a8 `: I1 `* D" C她是大学教瘦?1 n: [0 g! Y  O( o( A: R6 I
大学教胖还差不多
4 [( o# s! _# t9 |6 r她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
) o, I# V5 B+ T# b. v4 S/ D紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

4 a: b! l' x: Y+ U6 p9 f( [/ d说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
1 G  _3 S- ^% Q紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
2 F7 @# ~+ g- o) ^& M' M) M

5 O+ E! b' M8 j4 q+ H( p! |8 P1 u哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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