埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5116|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a/ K! q2 j& U& f" |+ A) P
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb: l- l) l" ~8 q7 T
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
2 F- W  f$ F" d1 cthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 9 A- M5 t8 A" h* R
  
) A  J; L0 [! a" Q0 P2 P The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so* a( U! n  f9 z4 W
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The/ T# j  j( l6 \5 V7 d1 S' ?" j! ?
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
2 F! @' h/ S& D- J1 K/ H% N$ g9 jask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,7 n; E& T8 b) K+ K# p, e
you pay me only $5. 5 X7 ]/ N* U+ m

! ^) i6 ?  h1 q& H3 B" F. P You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
# F$ b, J: N0 X9 o+ x8 Y will pay you $500. 5 u# X3 G4 P8 A1 n

; r# t% ]9 r/ C. G+ T# ^# u This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
9 Q- z& h" j! t7 a8 Kthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ; d3 k7 `8 p& D8 D% P
- J. @* C9 z" \, F2 `1 N
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
9 [  h; e! ^) @' ^1 \' Rthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' " F9 ?" X7 y; _, S8 B% o
( U5 X) F& b; n, t/ T1 k: S
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his. z- M% K1 p/ s! z4 p& D& h
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
" e; s7 t# ^, s* u1 Clawyer. - ^7 b) V6 Q9 @% d3 b0 ]4 s  P4 _. G

( r( F' _6 O' O# Q: |* _4 {, C2 A9 HNow, it's the newfie's turn.
, z# T# J, ]2 H$ \4 k) y
! h' z# |6 W# L! H# [& n! O9 a* wHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
8 u# K2 }; g8 \three legs, and comes down with four?' 9 b0 |2 T2 n& o0 S4 j; K

/ Z* f) k. l) X4 @& }) p7 X" i! \The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all3 X1 A8 `% v5 e( N4 K0 X
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
2 v3 N0 I4 h1 T  @! Z! fthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour4 t. w1 N* s9 A( N& k% A7 K& [8 n
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
8 @; _5 c& M6 n" vhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right1 l7 c5 k: \  q
back to sleep. 1 U. O* a4 T, ~: B' `
. h( N+ m: H$ o$ n; l3 _: ^
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He' T; a# y; J" x3 ]
wakes the newfie up and asks, " N, J7 x# G: n2 J5 v0 Z# b" Q+ s

. a- g3 B9 [2 M9 k1 w8 a/ Z$ B7 @'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and; ]' E5 o& G/ A2 A, T, h
comes down with four?'
, ^2 _. t8 b  U. X! ^( c6 k' a) t; B) q' }9 g
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
" s! _0 B$ B: f9 B0 N8 }% Xand goes back to sleep./ C+ P: N5 J; M0 \- b: t% d

' N6 {% t1 y6 f. O
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!: i, Z+ h9 f/ J5 i$ x

7 ~' z  H) c8 X$ b% _; {Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the* r1 e- }/ H2 N8 U5 G& J
& C5 k1 ~& F  \3 l
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ) D/ B, y# g3 L: n% Y) w
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
* E3 f+ N5 [2 k; Z>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
7 i2 }3 t) @7 }& g& A$ ~. M>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
0 z3 U. g8 B. v0 f* t9 D  H>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
* o: A! B# A" x
* D9 A7 O0 U0 r7 K2 \>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ( k- n; O& ]8 ^- R3 R) v$ W5 P" u
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
' h1 L1 r; `3 @>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more + |- [% J/ g1 w5 D+ \& A4 Z+ Q
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
; l# M5 Z6 a2 e' U' r>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three/ e7 s$ x1 o% E! C9 u

7 g* E& t! a( }% k>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 5 B* J# m7 D. H5 r
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
' X7 ~/ v; B" {>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
4 h9 y$ ~- [6 {9 e1 n7 g- ~>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
( D5 Y2 |. ^! l( w- `8 g& aA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
/ W% X4 X9 J5 Rlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb  O, x9 W4 B' x! x1 ~/ \) Z7 G# G7 R
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if" B/ V; y7 e0 H) u. g7 D
the newfie would l ...
& R# A  `& g" n5 x) v3 I
6 w% e2 h2 a  i$ e+ R

- |$ w0 r, Z  c; Z; B$ A' {) ~好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
1 F9 n, h5 _3 u“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,4 s, }8 g. U. H4 `- Q1 b
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 . ^1 ~3 Q% u( R9 ~0 H9 H
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ z! U9 t, m: `真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
+ E- \  p( n3 I/ D# u6 G% j" x0 h& Q  U8 J1 N' [. G2 O2 |
" y5 f8 ]  r. c" r2 I# c8 h. ~
* n. T! D1 k+ z8 H/ F6 g
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:3 f  l5 y0 ?$ Z  M- h
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
- ]" k/ P7 L) t- j4 ~好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
2 ?) r$ P; j& Z: g/ o
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 : N. s0 f. L# G# c6 I- r- ?

9 W- L+ p: O5 }  {$ D真聪明,偶像啊

% I' J" f6 o4 `$ ?: |. f- S7 s4 o4 n8 h6 K+ [+ Z) ~
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
% P- d: ?7 Q- y5 q) T* l* g+ @; T2 t; O" B3 T

5 h0 L# f7 a' @0 N3 O全盘接受一下。
2 T0 }$ b& r6 [( R6 d8 Q+ x
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
( b6 Y5 `9 J6 c0 {. s
1 @% e8 p/ p2 C真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
" x+ r) h0 R% S. y  A7 o
5 }9 c: C( c& A. @+ h8 `6 ?$ Q
0 u* B! C% K$ z# }7 r
别把我往坏路上领啊。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
* \/ p) I. @: [& D8 d
* M4 z; D4 E3 O8 [# y2 B, X. L4 n0 p0 \% _' H

; ]& `9 h& y0 m8 j; s别把我往坏路上领啊。

; s8 H2 w7 M- w: c+ D1 p5 i你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: L2 }' p/ ]! l& B5 ~7 y' u加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
+ R7 _' n" B. ^( \
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
( @' x2 z/ K; W7 u
3 }+ y! ?% p# o% d5 \  y真博学,偶像啊。

8 _6 i! F+ e% V8 ]5 D! O9 F* I$ T大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 9 I. W: ]# M7 p
$ x+ b4 I3 r5 a& w
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
4 Z9 i7 ~6 |5 j7 i2 q
她是大学教瘦?
3 b! w+ K2 R8 p" i  r3 h大学教胖还差不多
! `% i' _9 o% M1 I她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
+ U, B6 s$ F8 N5 v. E* g& A7 I紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

" q) C2 I+ {9 k$ [说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
6 q8 f# ]- ?+ I6 H紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

% u5 |6 {5 h9 M4 b& I
2 ~. f- I- ?% c, d) Z( J哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-4-19 13:10 , Processed in 0.461933 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表