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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a! `  a+ H6 V1 X
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
/ p! S$ P: \) a% ^4 Rthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if! j% J1 C# k1 w' B  u
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
; ]0 c" }* m- L' K' Y  7 {5 \# C" x+ B4 ^3 A# E. G2 _
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
- ]& L0 r; J9 v7 @1 u+ ] he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The( a6 \& w/ F5 W# \% M" C$ @( S
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I# X4 H( i3 I, g$ y* J
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
. z4 ~0 F7 P) Hyou pay me only $5.
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/ ]6 h) n5 c! d: t$ k6 D# r You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
+ p8 ^. b9 p! u  \! d will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep9 C% p8 Z, X8 s8 I! w' a, f; j, I
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
6 y- F) Y/ S) I: i( I" Z! z2 Gthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' # _! z# V8 H0 Y1 ?# ~0 L; A: D
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
) j* @6 |8 f4 \7 z. rpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the, Y& m; U- P; U/ b
lawyer. $ V5 p4 K6 \7 B! i) l. }

. [: S& a1 P5 {( ~" w2 _2 [- k6 O& o* JNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with8 q, @7 g. J# K, G9 s) m
three legs, and comes down with four?'
3 ~% }0 i: v' A
8 p3 W8 t0 s% O7 k* x* b4 k2 t/ oThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
1 K2 o* L8 J4 V' `! kreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all. a: g0 Z. L; ?: Q
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour  r6 `( F/ I9 q% v" i; I6 C0 B
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
, F9 P4 L1 K$ ehands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
: w9 D+ `4 m2 r  v) R! cback to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
% U( T* Z  Q4 q  o" j2 i' ?; n5 C- M6 uwakes the newfie up and asks, 8 A/ ]8 g+ z* l+ y2 L: K  G+ a- n8 J

( h+ _% k) S) e'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and7 Q' Q+ k8 K$ ~$ x+ Y6 \
comes down with four?'
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6 i: K/ q( D4 v+ u) N( mThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5/ i) p3 K' D6 ?0 y) R  N
and goes back to sleep.3 `# C4 u9 i; k0 v  G2 J7 S
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!0 M2 d& k) ~4 n$ k& v
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
# J5 _0 T% a. g$ O* f  Z( J7 x+ t" Y- P1 ?* }
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
/ z& j8 q9 p9 _7 |$ p: Y5 ~- A9 O>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 7 L9 b5 V' a( y/ Z* w6 \
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ' p9 r4 z6 X, R* b) r( Y
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ( W( b* S+ U5 S6 @! d
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct& Z- \2 O' z; q& i# i" ^/ F
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 9 Z( l8 g8 x; O0 R( g8 b' b: u$ w
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a : O* _. S8 y, Q4 Y' S& _1 J7 a1 i
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
) W) k& T, A& L$ z>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
! ^. s- R! ~5 }% p+ {, e6 q>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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; A7 S, v' Y0 z( m" M+ X>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ( n, `) ^" j/ j$ T$ U
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
. K! A+ s, X+ R0 D>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
3 {+ ?7 F# j% W' s9 a>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
0 ~/ M& c& G9 `5 F' M6 \' D+ EA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a* E2 L* H$ i7 c, c
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb+ n9 I0 |- ~8 t
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if5 i& U0 G8 V$ W  B1 q+ }- {, E! R1 R
the newfie would l ...

# `* b# w1 O, m5 V6 ^
% [, P3 O4 A0 t) \$ {$ T; `4 P* z
: e: Y. t- c- |2 d( ?好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
! k6 m* d6 R! }& p* m“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
* |' v" z1 f3 l5 R5 I好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
9 G9 O! S) y9 L加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

8 A+ W: y' `- m: ^# F8 c: }5 ^真博学,偶像啊。
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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$ Y, e  |* M6 z
5 {, D8 T! S3 R( b- H5 _9 L好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:9 o" `1 p' L1 h) b- }* i
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
5 l) P) u4 S& Y* f9 U好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
6 f# q  p+ Q' t3 Y2 u
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
  ]' i2 M, C5 m8 d; H9 _( z
1 a8 _8 `0 n5 s- j* ^真聪明,偶像啊

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全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ' X( r! r9 _& c; d/ Y& b5 G' n
) ~7 _4 P8 N% o" g. @
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全盘接受一下。

. u6 X. W) K, T* b: H真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 1 y4 T- t8 S* R: V# Y" Q
. z: a. S  H9 Q% A- [
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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4 B9 L5 g$ D' ?2 C: A" ^# ?别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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9 b3 Y' ]: ~) u# @
! ?; l# b& A8 N7 ~2 z- F% h# k) y. J) a& j
别把我往坏路上领啊。

) r  E' w$ Q! n( ]$ t. o/ y2 `你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 / c* b8 ^$ `; K- {0 z0 j. D" v
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ) e# e3 j/ X4 s- H; N- l0 L! H* u

9 r1 M8 t$ c7 ]真博学,偶像啊。
9 ?- C3 Q6 N! J& T. U- ?0 h7 `! ]: i
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

6 |* c% T" l! u- T! r6 q5 A她是大学教瘦?- o: N1 [" W9 J- I. ~
大学教胖还差不多
0 |5 ?7 I9 e+ ]4 r4 q& t8 z她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ( V  P. ^# d1 t7 ?
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

% B3 W9 Z1 a9 Z% h说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 9 t/ s" i2 I2 H. ~  b/ }7 [' a2 S, r
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

; l$ ~" S" U) u0 x+ J/ y2 p+ v7 a( Y, W" ]& @( j  t
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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