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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a' ?7 O7 E6 d, @; A- [
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb  b+ n- a: o) S+ ^
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
2 u' v: R4 `  H  Ythe newfie would like to play a fun game. * B, R; I* }; ^0 h# ]
  
# b3 ^: J; A' O! v+ r The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so0 o( ]2 l( z0 A- }
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
' S. y- c1 d: ]5 B5 C lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
* ^6 U8 f% \( R4 C9 B8 P# B( S- task you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" O$ i* J2 I- `" ]you pay me only $5. ' g7 y, `$ d3 {- F8 [$ _  f
. f& ^/ M) s: Z" Y. S, b/ U
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
; h" Q" p! y5 e9 S; e will pay you $500. 7 H! h$ `2 U$ ]' o8 X* E7 T+ Z

  A  R3 H: x" A' d This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
1 b' ?- @: j! [* `( P5 c2 {the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
2 O4 P  L" [  x8 W
: `/ X9 U: Z2 ]7 b0 I# L8 [( R6 |The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
+ K& z9 i) e3 A+ o5 d- r0 S( sthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' : `$ L' ^/ y4 F+ j2 y. u  R
2 t; y  j4 b8 ~) A  ~
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his9 Z9 o7 R( B) l- q% g, P
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the+ J; x, X' i$ m3 S1 t' j
lawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
+ f+ b- {) Q' P, {$ k7 d2 ~) @: o' h9 F3 B0 I) H! C: A; T* q6 Q
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with0 p& ^7 G; k. A' e
three legs, and comes down with four?'
! t' j: o( f- r# c  \
. D$ X4 x& U4 f" bThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
  O6 ]9 {+ a$ Y- y/ _5 J) Ureferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
. D& `" M0 h' Bthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
& ~, {  b$ Y9 w, n, V9 yof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
: ^7 s' {( S2 W5 ^! S$ \; [hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right+ ]& Y; b6 N8 u8 N: O0 }( D
back to sleep.
; ^1 F0 R* U+ z6 h! |9 K
5 O. r; g8 ]( WThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He# W. r4 `. h* g" ?6 v; n
wakes the newfie up and asks, . d3 e. ]2 F. T4 u8 r) D2 ]
+ ?1 d. C6 \" G
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
. G: @) o+ e9 U& L! @comes down with four?' : K! T' U1 i! f5 g9 q/ u
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $52 m+ G% D" w: ~9 J2 z; g
and goes back to sleep.1 v3 X+ c! W7 {& c+ O
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!0 K. K* _: K2 ]5 d4 d: g
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the; X7 `; ?7 a& k% j8 Z4 R. q( T
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
9 N% P, I1 c, D, A* c0 y: D* t>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason ; s& P, k; M' X9 e8 i# C# ]
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
5 L7 f: [3 ?/ ?; l>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ( m6 k+ j: v, z$ B
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
* c1 e9 l- H1 @! N
. i  j# [) M3 y/ H/ s4 C( p>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
2 Q; |5 S7 \0 D1 O0 l>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
3 R/ D4 O! ^% ~4 W' l% ]# U>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more * }6 {& G, [; M9 h! m
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
) C- _# N; ~' Z1 e" W1 u$ S* A- l>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three9 ~, u. H' t6 e. M. \9 h

( u3 A' X/ t! Z; L1 [8 G' ^) X+ k>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ( X7 j1 H1 v! J) {2 b8 ~
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
7 ?6 E8 h0 R" a1 P& U* X>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 2 p- k' x' Y( J
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
# l/ ]$ ?! b' ~4 D; P- O. oA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a4 a& {* z' B7 B+ o5 D. F2 J5 c6 V
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb# u  A) \0 h5 [. r- f* S9 i& A2 T
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if6 R* Y1 D1 M' A* V# T
the newfie would l ...
8 w8 k. n/ Y/ L/ r' l2 j

/ [' H# z! B/ O
8 f1 x- ]  O  B0 O7 [好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
! l' x% [: X3 T9 o“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,8 `8 {& v: d, f
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
' G* r+ j% |/ W, j$ i/ g. E8 d2 l; }加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ( R$ S6 ]0 K. f& x! \

; J8 W# _9 P% @( t5 W8 X+ Q2 z" @- ?* d, s: ^9 K0 m, J$ z$ t# T
0 w; S' D& O) u2 ^( {: q
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
7 S" E7 n& {6 G/ A5 |# g% H3 E“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ t* B! A5 ?9 m1 `9 `好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
* P+ \! @9 v  t
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ' L4 E# l" C2 N9 B: d5 b
$ [9 e2 ~% e: \* k
真聪明,偶像啊

+ g4 {9 {. c1 T/ W& l
& a2 Z( o# H2 n, w全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 6 a/ v  W' y' K$ [# S3 i. }- R
+ `' _: ?: v+ ?& ^
5 _' W* C# h# A6 G. V1 X
全盘接受一下。

/ {" Y2 J% `% W* e# m8 E% s真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 ; _* A" i6 a5 c5 \
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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7 b: U+ S) y! v2 x$ @5 |别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 6 Y6 v8 t& s# r7 P
' @0 ?9 ~& B- I4 @

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
, {; y: t3 C( A
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
+ V# P/ Q9 W: u加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( X# o3 O" ]" v9 K& T9 ]多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。

9 e) N" n% c, d% J! {$ S大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表   X3 h& L2 f; P  A* ~0 ^
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

( L2 o) D0 f, y6 ^# K; E# D她是大学教瘦?( P1 M4 F$ Q' b0 f
大学教胖还差不多
) M; c* I  q5 g, P她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 6 |  W+ d7 P+ @/ q9 {
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 + H& e& d. N: i+ i7 v$ r- O
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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