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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
6 ^* [# ], X$ x8 Ulong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb) K* m. A% i* P* }* S, v
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
, _  @4 m+ L9 S' Hthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
! U5 i8 ~8 R. |# I$ a& }  
$ z/ h) o$ F# n+ E& T The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
( ?( g, I; v  q' ]. o4 a he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The) h' }" t/ m5 J2 N* p
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
4 M# b/ d+ Q& a$ O$ r% Fask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,( U/ A: |2 z. t$ b5 N/ e
you pay me only $5. & [9 S, i* n. J! v

- W2 X) T! ]! j4 \) k+ ~ You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
' t. [0 u6 q* A1 [% S2 L, a8 y will pay you $500. / y* g! ~) @6 e2 X7 S* _# @

6 X  Y0 h3 H- U. l- v7 d5 q5 L. d- z This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
% k7 f6 B" u; c( |the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 8 E* n7 N) a  S: G9 L/ a  P

9 `: P% H+ r+ e# m: c; oThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's7 @8 B' I7 V0 J/ o
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 4 @2 n: d/ ?+ W. E3 ~

8 W! L# Q) Z9 K8 }The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his0 X. ^' T: a6 _& {1 Q3 x
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
6 \  k/ E8 i" t  \& K5 E6 wlawyer. * k4 b: ^5 g( J) S" d' c/ h
9 h5 [0 g0 M0 d, w& K# T+ s
Now, it's the newfie's turn.2 o/ o/ E6 s. P- f; ~0 w) [, S7 T$ n
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with1 Z7 W6 N0 v! |6 Z: K
three legs, and comes down with four?' 1 U( r/ q0 ^& }  H9 d/ U
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all0 }! T" a; i0 U  F8 d4 M2 [/ G
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all$ e4 _3 t/ H. `3 y, n" b5 Y9 {
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour8 T; d! A* P# o
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
. K" U8 R' o3 e4 U# vhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
0 h4 d, T/ p( d" ^, o9 tback to sleep. , e5 _8 F4 ~( V# }% W

. z4 v% v1 k* q( ]2 AThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He7 S5 n' r5 b, y& S1 n
wakes the newfie up and asks,
, u. c. B& m6 Y& w2 u1 H, T& y, G# {& P" _. ?! a0 s
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
3 H. Q$ N, u% \, U' Z% E0 ycomes down with four?'
  S2 `& z, X/ F% ~# _
' O# U$ X$ A9 t+ o* ?The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
* N) f- x2 \/ l$ y* Eand goes back to sleep./ g* L8 c% z9 B2 \1 g

$ {* C9 o2 e, x, e0 s
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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( D3 ~: e+ x3 a! _  _8 G. |>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
) G4 A- D/ I0 `>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason ; K9 m: Y3 y  r3 k5 n# c+ w
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 0 K, R, K, \- y2 L
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
# ~! Z  ?& {! Y( j3 W0 Z>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct! E$ H, x& v7 m4 d. V6 X0 l
# n2 V/ m3 e5 X& c. Q
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 5 j  G% Z- k' E5 d1 O; @  ]
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ( x) J9 }( ~' ~7 m5 l
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more " ^# N5 r# e5 A! h& e( f  s
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ! F4 F$ T8 x* w: m9 O& A
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three2 B  S( {& i- S
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ( ~& b1 }  p# b4 {& v' |+ L1 G& C. s
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 7 m* b  k' {8 U- m$ Z# a4 N
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
5 a% c: q( Q' A! W7 Q& r3 O>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 % S+ A( J; Q' W: P" T! J6 c& G
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
/ N; t+ r) v. ^  h. X9 K/ R9 Elong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
; [& V! o) M8 Cthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if. t- F9 |# `/ Y- I' c: l3 V' d' [
the newfie would l ...

% ?7 W: V: _5 p; R; b* y% ]9 t: [9 N; y7 e
/ D/ ]( [8 J, ]' f1 M& u$ }( B8 k
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:2 ?( D- t* c% W! S  y+ V
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# E' b+ P6 Z0 e4 H. ~: M/ J
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: V. p: u. U( u6 ]加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
3 k% P5 k( S9 X- v# x
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
  s' Y2 _# E3 d' T1 `. A
0 U. @0 H3 b( u* Q2 i' z' B7 M2 Y4 c% U
! m$ l4 D, D- _9 S% w% x
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ r; O8 s$ b3 R, ], H. }“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,7 e2 }9 {) k) m$ F- G
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

9 S5 H" |' @' W9 q) k6 g真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
. m1 ?% p5 Y% e% i7 e% G2 R" V, g' `/ o+ K. l8 \) C- @) |
真聪明,偶像啊
- {7 f; @( u% T% j/ X+ p, g, z

/ P8 J# Q: x4 Z" o! x1 F全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ' x) b" e7 R3 c% O- c* @
- X* f9 g; M% _* I/ A) s
2 ]  ?$ A% `/ W. x$ ~/ g) _
全盘接受一下。

4 f: S/ T. L4 t1 M  |1 m7 R真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 5 G9 x, |4 D& a$ L! }: K, a2 b
2 h5 j$ l: [# D3 I5 c3 @
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

9 O$ @3 V7 x/ a6 m' b% S2 j  n" k' E/ A1 p6 [5 J5 G9 F

9 E. w9 g4 p2 i, s) n! _别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 0 w! W1 h7 K# n  n) `5 b
8 a4 C+ v' G. ^' @0 o7 i/ Q
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' }# D2 b4 p1 ~$ J8 r8 j" a5 |别把我往坏路上领啊。
; {! a1 b( Q0 [/ u/ E! ~
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
# d2 o! f" w  B6 h" g加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ L1 J# q4 Q8 C/ S( v% K多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 2 a* J9 P9 C. M$ U

" z6 M# ?) w; P& i" S真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 7 k2 B  U6 ^7 w8 @5 s

. |9 {7 A$ T( z+ i大学教授哦,能不剥削?
3 R( t" j% K$ A
她是大学教瘦?+ i. ^7 Q/ \0 Y: X
大学教胖还差不多
8 {8 E" m8 O$ U( o8 y/ m0 ]: f% a  H她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
8 Z9 r6 o) b, }! l+ n# y0 Y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

3 f1 J5 C, s  q8 T% M说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
+ w& B+ \8 E* P, I* L+ @紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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