埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 4232|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 ?+ T4 k5 U! z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb/ t6 W5 r+ ?( {: K
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if5 c# h# Z9 N( b( ]
the newfie would like to play a fun game. 4 i: V% h& b* C' m
  
1 K. \& f! M) c! p The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so4 ?0 S4 g8 J6 b6 z5 z/ I( Z
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
2 V6 D9 I" H& F/ X3 W. T lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
* x( u, ~- s1 r# R( f( D) R/ Bask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" o; `) ?' Y9 d1 B8 x0 a. X0 Z% ryou pay me only $5.
9 w8 ~  m% ?' h' d" k ( `' N" P7 T" R. a! J9 k
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
: ]4 X" S5 M- H+ p will pay you $500. / X" C9 h/ S/ [6 y! ]: v. x

7 E! I% Y; F- S5 l% J  ]/ e4 N& V3 k3 A This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
+ h3 l" V1 P8 p9 ]" jthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. : {) G6 ~+ w2 j9 Q- X3 E
) }: Y: o' h: b1 e0 }) s2 L
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's+ e) f  T2 h+ o2 I5 a5 V1 L
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
( F0 B1 K: {2 g# |, C7 U& w
& \0 Z9 p1 g4 rThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
2 G( f3 f0 l+ `, \: Spocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
! l2 P$ z5 J2 Q- d  b: vlawyer.
# k# p; |" O8 Y: W
$ G) y5 L% D$ P$ m1 ^/ `3 Y7 UNow, it's the newfie's turn.
: B/ Y$ o  U2 J' {* N
) O% C- o9 r. J& a. rHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
' p: x. y5 W9 D4 z- q, Fthree legs, and comes down with four?' . _' i- N, {% ^! j

9 E( n$ \4 N2 p7 mThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all4 e2 O$ n5 l! N& E1 Y; K
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all" g6 j4 b; \/ g" t
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour; L% x) ?$ M$ [. o
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
7 m9 X- E+ `$ c; `% h+ xhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
% F# Q# p' |# K, L% [8 hback to sleep. 4 v$ O! I6 ^0 s0 q& c  D8 n

$ h3 e+ p0 h+ z$ jThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
# t- {* N7 z2 d6 V6 mwakes the newfie up and asks, $ k# ?+ _$ C" ~- L/ D6 n8 L

6 q/ m1 e8 `6 r'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and) y) \1 M$ K4 y! Y" u
comes down with four?'
3 M8 m4 y) J9 x& R; t5 ?" I# s. w" }# G8 B# W( h# b
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
5 k( Z, q+ r; X- xand goes back to sleep.: k8 ?5 L$ P2 a, P2 s; c" @0 \; p3 S

: Y2 M( m+ j) o5 @
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!$ I: ~: r6 q+ v: a) e2 N
5 J- F) l3 C" A& _, O
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the3 E( l, Q& s; b9 s( }
5 R0 `7 G' Y2 k+ o9 ~+ Z* e
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
% _% {# [' v# ?>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
3 l4 X3 D, D; n' f( A8 b>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
+ t( J9 ~/ d+ ~$ I6 R. Z>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
& t# g# T( H3 K& N4 E+ k>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct; _7 i; c4 N0 j# w

# W6 \( R" ?9 _/ J; r( {, |>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 3 ^2 _5 `: \4 I$ g2 ^
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ! X6 J8 U7 Y9 `
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
$ M) P' t5 Z) y. l* y, j>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
4 n9 p- Y1 n. ?- S. x>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
8 i5 u. s; H% X" T, N/ r% M" U
8 j7 |" Q" F1 \# W4 l7 I3 z0 s$ u>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ! o6 }6 w- Z! V
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the , `! L" n+ O! E2 Z  A* L
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 4 D( s" y/ \8 g+ Y2 p
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
  o$ A" s$ ?5 G: `, BA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a+ J2 g; g; q0 F& y# X
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
" z$ A& M) M# {$ v& }2 \9 W# e" J4 ethat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
- f5 @. a& f( {. c/ Xthe newfie would l ...

( U6 s& Q6 i+ B& i( e+ p$ `6 p  F6 c8 m) G
& m0 U. d% i% B: s8 Q* w
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
- g$ _" E* P/ }* |" o“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
9 P- Z' V, W2 }0 B) d. g好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
' T( d2 h. c6 x$ b$ L0 s加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
6 g8 }7 l$ l9 l- Y8 X
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
( x7 \" @  x) @/ A/ l& l7 p! F
# Q; L$ ~; ^* }7 U* ~6 H- j; f( T* _2 Q6 T

" z* R' Y/ L& L* k; e( j5 x好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:; f& q3 g  p0 I: [
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
( h* V8 `; N, x3 ?好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

/ I* h8 o) _0 R+ @0 I) \$ j真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
. Z1 Q0 ?. v$ ^: }
2 K  m8 ]( u& u. G真聪明,偶像啊

: @  A- Z2 F  [' |  S$ U
) U0 q2 I, g$ {3 g" t& n- y全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
0 S6 u, E, \* o7 V7 u0 B2 p- r8 `& K% c- a5 m- {1 n

$ p4 O0 M  n2 Z5 @; P% i4 x/ X8 s全盘接受一下。

' n# q7 ]: }. P: u5 d$ Y7 d真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
( Y8 l% n5 M/ I( q% W* H2 p0 k# p) D4 q) w$ j! v4 d8 `) i  e0 U/ D. o
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

/ Y! [' m- Q3 ]) G$ [0 N) l: J, o/ q% O" W/ E/ I$ i8 M
. h/ p0 z8 F  @% \! _' v
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 , v2 U7 F; K0 P7 Q# l- _
# N+ }8 k& k! s! d- @
& C. r! o) H( m! l2 y

8 \7 W+ j( A3 T- ~8 f& F: z别把我往坏路上领啊。

* I( \% H$ F: j* l7 Z" x. ~你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 0 d! X- n, t, t+ j+ F+ P3 R; s
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

, @' `9 @2 n' k3 U0 ~! J: `多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
, v4 x& |# Z$ D0 Q" P* S
$ {. b  [( ], U& `真博学,偶像啊。

4 x* K/ @6 Y7 e5 _5 j: `大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ' F/ R1 O- h+ F9 u7 D

6 y6 b5 l5 ~/ J0 A  c! y大学教授哦,能不剥削?

5 R2 s: s4 n  C: [* z0 F她是大学教瘦?. T" {+ ]. z, G" d
大学教胖还差不多
. d- l7 @$ r8 h8 E& A9 a她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
6 @. B" {+ F2 V$ Y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

' `) l. h/ L4 z0 t说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 " k1 j3 X2 q! K3 C/ v4 @) T
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

5 n9 H: k' A) H% |( E: m
0 p$ T% K" s$ S' r哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2025-11-6 04:15 , Processed in 0.192452 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表