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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a! K& @$ _* E( Y# j
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
% G, t& k6 F6 }. R4 `' Rthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
1 S! D3 p6 ?5 N5 s/ F( n+ Wthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
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2 L# p+ {0 s7 B3 u; s8 Y+ w The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so: v; x# y. G9 l. D# A
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The+ q$ n( ?2 Y: t: l! M# O/ x
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I4 f7 h$ C* T. K) h' T" X
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,+ l: }2 \( l1 x1 H- b& S! Y
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I6 P6 L# c1 Y# D
will pay you $500.
  F) o2 @% F- v7 K
* w9 m$ H, Q+ q This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
$ \0 s# ~. A7 E# Athe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ) I, M. m0 y6 M, \# s

3 M8 k3 m5 v" Y0 D9 [- [The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
( {) L5 c1 I5 l8 ]: Cthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' + l- d- M$ s* c% M& M

8 l6 f) M6 I- w) v" VThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his' V8 j2 _" \9 k) `. K" r
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the( ~* @) s$ A6 S
lawyer.
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$ ~% c% Z0 ]! A& d: V, O3 C8 f2 D* p, INow, it's the newfie's turn.( S0 v9 |! r9 x1 O7 E

4 T! M1 A" L5 r+ `' QHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with  ~; P3 f; ^' P$ ?
three legs, and comes down with four?' 6 R) ^& p1 A+ J# ?! s& C# Q/ |

6 P* Q! a! F1 qThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
) Z2 H' b" o# Z8 lreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all; |3 H" c, }/ m9 J& s' q! C
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour# \  D4 {( Y* Z; }9 x
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and7 c  m1 D( ]& p' Y' l
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
$ S% {1 t  f& B. k) b1 ?! Q) Kback to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
9 ~( K& j! T) d6 W3 Qwakes the newfie up and asks, / l# Y7 z1 u7 b" E; V$ F% }5 x" C: x+ b

2 {* J# i5 `6 \- w; p$ W: O'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
# T8 @2 n! h8 P. Zcomes down with four?'
( u( l! |+ Y  |5 {
/ `2 w. |; T; z, a& s  z$ J: XThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $59 H- H. N/ H. ~' S# w) {" F+ @
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!# W+ G& I: o! a* b. d: m

, J$ V/ I8 Q- r+ ?Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
1 q, J( l0 q9 a- e7 s8 B* D1 }& P- B7 E! }
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
$ A7 K' w0 R7 l9 j5 U7 ]: p>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 8 u# y( J& `) x
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
5 M% u1 `9 v- \>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 5 Y( @1 `0 }8 C
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
* B( i5 T# O* s% _
) {$ N; _4 b1 z: d1 V>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
+ C4 G7 x$ H/ M' J8 y>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
: `! p0 ~3 y- x4 }& ^0 h/ K8 h>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
+ q* }$ J0 O! J6 n* v  P& @>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, % C* l+ X+ L2 M1 Q, h/ c
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three- m; G3 S9 U* k

  r* r$ C3 c* d% b  n>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 3 i5 n$ j, E* R' X
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the & r$ V  [1 r3 {* q
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand & }# m: h( L' @8 o" W: r0 k( A
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
2 Z2 S9 j* p0 z7 Y7 G- l. [% wA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a# v( j5 A6 M9 c0 G, N& z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
8 X8 C7 J1 D8 B: ^% {5 ~" ythat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if: G6 [6 g( Z6 ]; D6 A
the newfie would l ...

# e' Z  N  `# U4 P0 N: c2 M6 v0 I& f7 W  A8 Q$ B" ~$ g! [: w& w

' A$ ]! V. b& e: q$ A: T! ^好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:1 J+ V/ o5 x' `1 K/ z+ e& G3 t/ |
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
' P) B" g1 ~( I. ?1 S  B好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ; }8 d+ v! p% p0 m' w
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
6 }8 j3 ?8 i: L( p* E
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 & f( ]# G( g# U! D. t; L" P1 R

2 O  x0 y% p! [/ ^/ \1 v
/ R; Z# K( J7 ]$ h/ c. A7 r3 B4 u5 s  y
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:  t" r9 p' q- H4 i# q- U
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
) ~4 W/ r5 Z9 I2 J5 }( M. e好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
: R% B$ C3 A- C" ^$ ^1 h9 K; S
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊
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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 + ~6 @( T- N% U! F  F# c

7 m- X4 t# x- L/ @9 z( V
* G6 K( }- W; a* F6 g全盘接受一下。
) S5 c9 m5 w( I3 P6 v
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 3 U3 _0 K5 o; j# u; n& d

4 Q, e' V' D4 H6 D" n. _/ D" G真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
7 l: j: ]) t8 U: j

: I- U6 W: X4 l
% V5 Q' o  N3 r+ w+ @5 ~3 i别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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: H/ V8 w2 U- G; p2 u

$ \3 d8 ^9 x7 C) M3 S& b别把我往坏路上领啊。

# t& N$ {5 k; {: e& z& h8 p# j你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 7 S! s% P1 r6 v- o& H1 N
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

% B9 h8 w' R$ E多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
/ v6 ^- }3 u+ x9 Q( Y+ T% Z2 ^7 _* N: @# w9 n
真博学,偶像啊。
! J8 D: x; M' J$ ]
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 / V/ j* b  a' I. s* s# C3 m) }
) W+ W5 ?% a. H: C  M" `
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
: z) ~' f! l( x& v
她是大学教瘦?
: h, ^6 T! |1 A. u8 i大学教胖还差不多 + R. C0 J/ g0 f2 k
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 5 b) t* B4 \' M0 H( o9 c# E
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
0 `# h; ]) d, i$ f" y2 l$ X. O
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
2 v* r- w1 j3 @* B紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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5 N5 [5 _6 v6 z
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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