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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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6 V5 Z6 w' H+ Y- U6 o- T; xI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.. ]8 O, U, L7 B2 n
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.4 n# P- h' v; Q! ~4 g; H7 E1 p+ j
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:0 D# h1 [& L4 g
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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- n1 G- k' q! G% z$ cI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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4 i" v: t3 ~: UAnd the second one was:) V' X; t; y# j
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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! M9 V$ I  I3 i+ ^2 YI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?" v2 V' R3 j, r# m
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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9 D3 o$ Y9 F* R1 x4 L8 p/ FI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?2 _$ m& [3 H- {! h, Q$ r7 S8 T7 p$ f4 \% k# A

4 z4 P: ^, Y$ I8 ?% ^& E5 LI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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8 e4 H& [) E" O- mI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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; r' O0 s8 r% e* c7 U0 `So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:. y9 I. a$ S) a* O: s# ^

' c- [. q( V! H8 ?1 Z1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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, P0 B) U  l& g- S# `" F0 T! ]* x2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.* I# U" V6 t: w/ e& A& P

4 V; `; M; H& k6 e' s8 J1 q4 nJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".2 r  d+ M5 k$ @
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
( F- [0 ^3 s% V! `a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
7 ?  X- M1 S* U/ C$ {怎么理解?
* h+ ~4 C, d/ f! O" r2 b50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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0 V' d/ C+ G- r3 B5 o不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。0 s7 U) Z- Z9 u- j- o5 k( L
怎么理解?; r' z  q6 p4 u' H
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?" {- `7 ?$ M  {, B) K' H
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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, B# g" w4 x! B5 e我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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' F1 v" a1 {3 _$ U我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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