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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.1 T4 c" b5 P% ~; F9 x( ~6 }

& k" w% B& p: D! G, l* [# G8 FI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.2 ]. K) {" D. p5 V5 F7 F

. V% S, Q* w* UI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.$ [4 M) p/ c& `8 F8 T

, W1 a9 q, @7 L9 p/ x( YI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"8 V2 i' k' b+ ?7 Q. g0 ^/ _
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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  ^, }# o8 T9 e8 z"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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4 H8 D/ V3 ^4 N' Z! TI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?- w5 b6 D, a" \+ I, @& j* r
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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1 q+ s4 C; j8 Q. X& QI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen.": y9 q1 l. O$ U" D3 G3 u
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"  I; Z  N" X7 c

" p1 A, x9 b1 P: j+ h/ P4 d, QNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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$ H4 S7 M' H9 l, }- ~This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.' Q' y: A# S, c
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Thank you very much!" g/ v& f7 n% |% ~. P; V$ u2 Z, P
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==========================
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1 q0 W0 D) R$ T/ U) v9 I2 c: IImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:- ]% Z5 y9 W) \- J7 T$ y
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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, C, v9 @9 g6 r2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.% Y7 x9 C, g$ G$ ~0 I' s: w" d
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.: b' r' P5 n* u0 T* I8 n
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.$ Y7 \2 G  b, O4 Q( k+ J- a; Z

$ d4 A) r# l  IThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: ( U( c2 B" m) ?8 \+ Z
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
1 q9 f- F9 o8 v$ \. J/ u) Z- ]怎么理解?$ `* I( b$ i) X
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。7 ~) ^. X. R9 i( j
怎么理解?
# f" R! q/ V; r2 [2 ]4 ]5 b* p8 w50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
9 e( R. o1 y% dcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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- v8 _1 K# y$ ^8 i) W我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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