 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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( _) r( q5 `# `7 @I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.& G! `% I9 `8 L1 k G1 J
2 O* g; y0 o$ F; ^3 kI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.( z5 o! L4 J9 s) G
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:- ?8 x0 N i* u F
: z( x# @* n! G( b"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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/ e6 [& E; a$ h7 z& Y2 a, jI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?: K9 Y: {/ L' D/ T( V& }4 B
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And the second one was:' \% y( K7 O: e; p, i
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?". c1 A* R, _2 L" _
$ e! o- E8 p: X; CI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ k5 a3 j* ?* C, Z# r* Y6 h
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"" @ d; @8 P6 @& A! {
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?) a- J9 P6 l3 w3 H+ a* Y
: V1 V9 N9 O( e+ M4 |% q% b Y$ OI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!5 W- [8 w" j* B6 h6 c9 K, }% b3 G5 a$ n
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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2 x; c% v/ T3 p2 H6 {7 ]: Y: E- YSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"& \- ~- Z5 p( z3 G
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”3 N9 M, \+ s5 h2 R$ c
7 `0 p$ y- J2 f O5 ]* b0 B$ uThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!$ ^( M" J4 v" a2 t; M) }9 b V
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:+ Z v% G2 v/ a0 N/ q5 n
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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6 v( D: O* O# O% V5 J7 G2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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) l- H+ i; l+ B- k3 HJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".; }7 Z) U1 s. C7 U
& D: ~7 g/ B/ b7 ~; N+ bRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.. x0 A4 t4 _% C' [# w0 ]
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
