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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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* b: U0 G& u7 c+ h+ ]% TI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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; i- c: d3 S2 EI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.. p7 g" c5 \  [2 ]  J

6 D" x( e' i+ F7 GI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"+ B: ]0 n( f- t' \3 j1 s

; i# i9 q( K) T1 b- @( P( e$ TI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:7 s# @2 K- h. o; n) S. P0 F

, O8 a) a5 s( C- S# a" V"What's the 2nd Amendment?"9 J1 @4 m9 [) [! |
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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" b$ M/ A8 M/ f! g7 l3 L7 n"What is Roe vs. Wade?". N: R, S' \0 Y1 ~- g4 u; z/ l

& j, @1 |/ l) P6 f2 z# x( s) WI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!" u% l, H5 o( k* u8 o+ i! a4 a

! n8 g! |( f7 O- B9 r- Z1 ?" d1 CI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."( h  T4 m6 K* W+ u( u* k6 i$ K
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"4 q5 t$ G4 X  S' S' t" a0 h

4 c1 E# B7 [) j- d$ z8 J/ LNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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# @( F! q0 Q6 |+ H, fThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.3 \- V6 h) l# O" ~- w
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Thank you very much!' r. F' X: }: E: Q0 Q2 s9 a. z
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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9 |. @4 [' w1 Q9 Q. v1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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9 D9 G$ d0 O. c4 s# o2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.* Y7 U0 `2 C9 Y
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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  P( u" {) @  F: n+ kJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.9 {$ l% e: I: A" j6 G

9 Q# A4 p0 C6 V8 GThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 5 ?' J1 q( ~7 d: A' v
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
7 z$ ~' z& k" c' {, z$ W怎么理解?
# j* L  x' S  m' h* E6 U: n50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。9 @$ M' i& m$ e9 Z1 T/ i
怎么理解?/ m3 B, J& }5 D2 w2 c. W
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
/ k' y: C/ U1 y1 R) \cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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' N7 s4 s8 T% }+ G9 @( w, v0 N$ K我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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! D& Q6 z3 e) `, S我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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