 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.8 v% G; M$ B+ E
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.8 s% v4 D/ A* ? z2 h
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.5 _$ i& X3 O) s) v& q
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:6 i# C) C6 Q* G7 _6 H3 d( ~4 l
) x b" X; h9 \' g"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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( k" [3 [! t% n% C' e i7 h5 tI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?3 q' [5 y" P0 X/ P6 o
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And the second one was:" ~# z: f! @ W& L
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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G3 h/ J3 L5 `$ M, EI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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. p/ a- L; Q! w7 J"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?: f: @+ G( ^' K* t! D
Z+ r" r" R. E: F& N! a/ z, @* ZI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!, `& o5 \) r* w5 u# O5 h
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"4 N8 O, |- V) I r) i( _4 ?
: O* Y2 J6 D3 x( I" oNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* L' W8 ~& ^2 Q# g2 ~
3 s7 T! y% |- G6 y4 rThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.* N- Y+ g: z9 n6 i) V" a1 g
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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" c+ B1 R& _& \1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.2 j1 Q; P! x: M- L
! ?! n; A$ E: M2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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! q" v8 y4 v5 K' m( B1 ?. a, E3 n"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.$ w4 A( y5 ~! w9 {
l3 E5 `9 F$ I* q( uJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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; n2 a6 r+ b$ X. V( X! v2 o Q% CRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.3 x+ R, O9 Q8 o1 N
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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