 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.% k, N) b- w. c" @
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.' o' w7 Q; ^+ T; F: D3 j
6 T! I+ a/ f4 g6 m: AI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:( z. [# r; ]0 ~1 M' Y
3 ~. b5 q. P) F4 I"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"3 X4 e7 h! L7 s( k
8 M0 q! V8 l: B- m6 j5 c' w6 m( JI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ h! k- M- j! X8 c
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And the second one was:3 N) }6 C$ P9 h+ `
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"; ?- A6 n4 j( D6 Q' w P$ v
/ x1 L2 x }: u% E. pI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? a& x# B; c2 s3 b- R: Q b4 j
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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$ e, L' e! V# l* UI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?4 V6 f C' m- {0 y) ]8 M. V
$ N+ L- F9 u/ }2 \0 ~' F: @$ EI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."5 U+ e" i' s. ^/ @5 P
4 J7 z! r! x8 S0 V8 u6 a5 ~So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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8 |3 d8 J+ c5 a; E( [3 PNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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5 ~+ N$ o; {, `' q L/ ^3 F2 D# O1 fThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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9 b% ^7 V# p m" L% \$ z/ uThank you very much!
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. F( d+ w+ S' M0 d) zImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:( J9 Q# P7 P6 Y/ V3 d* r1 I3 V
4 n3 f7 Z" \* m# [. q; J0 ^. d1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.* [- P2 j( M- T; o& G; W
* O3 e* M. V9 w+ C7 D2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".% N1 U+ L+ \/ Q) B5 a0 x
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
