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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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( ~0 o8 J: w- k' S$ s7 Z3 n$ nI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.1 V3 J. @$ A. R- q% D: Y
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.  {0 x& e  Y  [" K5 y9 j

0 Q+ p+ s8 T1 {8 R# U( r/ FI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:& x) C8 t! p2 G. P; ^& M- r( S

, I$ u0 D8 d1 @! m) _, D& _"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?7 ~" n* |, F1 V" J) o9 \) Z

1 D/ R/ ?, z# a. F) k. k( iAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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$ P* s, t, L6 e; A5 I  K( @" G  FI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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* J. b) E8 G; m) a$ eI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!9 w, S4 n' |5 @8 b& r) I
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."( w+ ~# P7 ?( T/ ~; Y9 P
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"5 R4 V: j1 ^* }! J) Z4 b; {
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”' W& i$ U8 _4 ?" Y( n( f! E7 ]

& k6 x$ q! _2 C; SThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.) d% L  C* g, m- R* c1 U

+ J& o7 A% z) W$ S, AThank you very much!
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+ F8 i+ Q, K/ e/ z- `* w$ fImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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4 l, s: r! }4 \3 N9 a1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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$ H; o7 v9 b9 ~5 T2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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3 J/ `4 v/ `5 j. yJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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% h- g2 h4 m# i; K" uRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 1 |. u: i& ^# G1 j( y% y& }
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。+ D7 H+ i/ U1 A
怎么理解?" ?: u% Q/ R: j( L
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
; }) t* P% }! J2 @怎么理解?
0 W4 b2 C1 C9 O4 y) ]! v50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?) x" M* B) F& N" h6 h; Q, O; F
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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. F+ i" w0 v4 u5 J% B! [我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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