 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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8 }) `- s" |% b! N5 J: ~, T+ NI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.: [+ W! {! D! |3 j/ v, Q* E8 V
E. s. N. ^+ y1 j! ]I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:6 S0 Q' t: b- e" I
" l! m) _ j! n% \7 g"Who's Benjamin Franklin?") u2 n. C: W! q% X# \8 L
1 a k: |* E9 P q3 ?4 k1 R/ pI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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; u" i _2 |: e4 }# G8 d, bAnd the second one was:
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. ^) t2 j) b: ]; A- Z"What's the 2nd Amendment?"/ g4 U8 |- H: `+ P
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?( s8 I) M5 D1 a+ ~5 | |
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"3 q' z+ j8 T. r W& c( B2 V. n: Q
- z: k8 G+ z! H( dI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?: B, _' w, T; `; E
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!2 M0 V7 ?/ H2 G: Z7 N4 q
$ D" S; k+ d7 C: {7 o0 B+ AI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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- _2 A: X( V/ x* HThank you very much!: B4 J% S! p' _3 i
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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/ w9 I" j& [6 `6 X! i"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion. W) _, y4 o$ a. U( l& k5 j' C
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".0 K- F$ b4 e& J# l$ L
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.& _0 }2 [. b' F* W
( d) ^0 K# D4 C1 d6 FThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
