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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.2 ^- A8 F( j: E$ i
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.) ]( C  e( G/ e* U; p) `+ x
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.+ D, p. \$ @: c' G: V' n
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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8 i# ?. F# |1 Q1 C) Y1 HAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"4 s& y/ s& i- V) S9 m

- y$ r+ Z, h0 c9 Y  U' EI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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: @3 V8 Z$ A  o"What is Roe vs. Wade?"0 y5 P) r3 V3 [/ |5 r* c

' i2 [6 ^% P- J4 H) _- B. {I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?  i$ r2 F# R5 I  @7 S3 E

5 M( w8 F8 _( I& GI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!- q: V' W) ]* y2 @

. _4 D/ g  F! Y! WI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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6 G! N/ l) c- U6 U" |1 H! aNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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5 b4 G+ F4 @  bThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:; Z& j- y  H. y. b/ l( d) _7 Q

& `, G1 `- v5 m, a1 L# t7 k3 l* g1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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  x, }0 b' `5 N6 ]( E$ _"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.# M9 |6 s2 U" ~! E3 b. p

' w  u! j. n/ L3 g1 ^; LJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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& ?: s5 E  `$ x+ M* Y  `7 rRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.- C: P1 p2 R/ r( y( L! n, L2 P
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 4 t' H1 I% c7 r) _
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
% f" h2 U/ t$ o( U& r怎么理解?
* p' G/ V% C, x' B6 Y! k4 s50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 - v: @9 W3 O7 N6 f9 }6 s
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2 [: j, V! k  c6 q4 Q6 T不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
2 Y* r; t! i0 M. Y怎么理解?
( p1 X% Y6 u& G" e0 k- o, J. c! k, s50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?4 ]' K' F% B( p$ V/ @" x" C: n
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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, S6 y, x( j' _5 m6 b' Q7 e( _7 e+ z$ W我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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( ?% D5 s9 M1 p% P6 I我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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