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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.' j7 F" @, I& I( t8 l$ Y% S

- Y* g" @# k! s  U, I, n- LI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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, L  ]0 j! x8 _0 R# b* [3 yI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.$ k1 L6 B3 O1 z! `

" K7 F7 k+ n! y4 @- RI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:" w: D6 n) h+ W! g- z

8 Q" U) o( W) x' P% k# S"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"  U1 r1 j; d; n% a9 t
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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7 [9 ?. t& f; y+ i) KAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?  R$ h1 K- T. W% r: w8 e9 M# M

* a7 w9 h4 y/ o% H& Y"What is Roe vs. Wade?"9 `4 l8 a/ G! s0 s- J$ f
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?( V- N- ~6 l5 Z1 Q: ^' u% F" e

- z) b5 p7 R  f5 m2 D; T4 ?I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!" y) B# F+ i6 ?0 L3 B7 P

/ e! o3 X, G% b& U& |9 z8 ^! iI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."2 ]: m( T/ H* {& e
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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; F; E$ |* M9 ]1 {, ZNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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1 G2 W) G$ Y% P5 ^This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:0 {/ R, Z1 t$ d- a3 l

0 `/ O# Q3 l5 g9 ^/ R6 K+ ~1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.* J! ^4 G8 }) `5 l
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".0 a+ Q6 D% }5 h6 c

- e" ^/ b: `% T$ M8 bRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
, @0 T. [9 m9 Ca young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
大型搬家
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
4 A1 y" B' ?. |' C& \, E" `' K怎么理解?5 I+ I9 S4 u/ f' `9 H
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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0 E, E; _& n* i, p& ]不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
" M2 S  {3 e9 `, s( \, E. z怎么理解?% c3 U# ~: ]6 _& x; {) @
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?2 _  y- ]' v. y8 @5 s. h+ k8 Q  |
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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2 P" s# U5 k9 L  X" k$ z" y( j- W我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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