 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.# Y# I2 v* h4 @$ I. k" @
: g0 c* q+ i; r- A, q3 rI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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$ [; D1 e) M4 I6 ~3 S9 U; W' }I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:5 j; e& C _( Y
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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# U ], a) b2 ^I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?& G; c4 k% ?* v0 I3 |
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And the second one was:
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3 X! K. ?- D, h) ~, a8 T x"What's the 2nd Amendment?"4 L* F3 |/ l% j( A3 B) F% z9 \6 ?
0 ~0 z) F; n8 b2 ?I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?. l( f# S* j. [, L; r! i6 \
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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& p0 }- _" |7 U: F2 I3 cI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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* x/ M; ?+ G. I! x0 I7 i' w+ Y- bI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!8 ^! N: L/ D( n; D3 {$ E
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"6 Q5 p- E% V* ?1 H# N
0 I5 N( p# H" sNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”2 U- ?, _- `3 I5 Y# R) ~
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.) d/ e- K. J6 K& F! S3 D% b; V
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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$ f; s" d1 Z- `; X4 S# I$ q"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.( {/ r n6 H$ ]0 ^
. h9 ?9 P6 A0 w* u$ ]; Q; @) GJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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! c' p6 p3 u6 j0 G) |$ I& e, pRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
