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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.! o1 U/ U0 b; p! o# _6 M2 e: G
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:& S% r: e: i) x9 t

* M/ C0 G+ \! ^9 H"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"3 r0 v4 s" t% _

, ]0 u. Z7 ?, {1 S. L  jI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ p+ u; P& a' n% |, s4 p5 C2 v( `
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And the second one was:7 y% h' _1 B( a% Y2 [+ \* h. \

- U7 q6 C8 d9 K* a: g( e"What's the 2nd Amendment?"( |: v6 s5 |4 y) l- y. T6 z

! k# _9 [; _- w1 ~I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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9 p2 ~5 d8 g; d5 Q  e) E"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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' R& a& }; {! e. C; W8 |So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"5 \0 u+ W# w$ c' y) O% D5 k4 s2 e

6 j6 [4 P* h: r5 M3 T8 C% ~Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”# F$ B; @6 I- N$ R5 Q' t1 D
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.* H- \; k5 c1 M/ R' P) b
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Thank you very much!0 g! p$ r6 a$ u9 _' r8 i9 n
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  [1 s9 T) D' ^- e+ Y0 F; \+ KImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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9 x; u& e5 p, t# b; G1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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$ t5 }) i/ T5 o; l# ~% }# n& g8 g3 p7 r2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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( t1 C3 R. B( j& m  N"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.2 U2 H, M; G1 d( i: G+ }4 g
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
7 B( O& F% q3 e! s8 D. g  D- T& xa young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。0 E+ I+ p3 w! l6 m/ a8 i
怎么理解?# a$ o7 B" z' |7 N# `
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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# o" S+ x0 I6 M+ J  t; G不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
3 ]  J. r2 B6 O3 I. X! Q% L1 x7 ^怎么理解?
5 b1 b' r8 L+ S* e/ n50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
; \0 c2 Q9 {" ^5 X  {3 `; h3 Q6 v" rcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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) [3 k! Y; w2 M# O1 J( G我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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$ y) `! v1 L* B4 c3 z我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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