 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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8 c- |9 M5 O4 N# K2 cI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.3 @7 R6 Z" X! ]) v
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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6 S5 T" d4 E8 E$ z. M' c2 t"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?, y4 N. M7 B0 O3 T& C) y- v& u
1 N% n1 S2 n/ A1 \And the second one was:1 O5 b: j: |- V+ N4 e/ ~% B% L
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?". @. P, h8 s/ T4 I, z+ M) G
0 u% T' v/ [. [% fI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?7 P6 J; z+ ?3 |- }
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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2 G! ~; Y7 V r1 ^9 }1 d1 tI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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3 U5 [, c4 |4 U8 W7 m- tI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"! \! L% q6 K" R: l6 [0 N, D6 L
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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4 ]% u- |% L4 T7 xThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.: q7 }1 ?5 S6 k: s% U4 K* O
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Thank you very much!! D4 g# Q$ l, q- R. Y+ s$ u, X
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5 t$ q2 k; O/ E2 gImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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* u- L2 C/ ~( X5 j( L# Q; D' x1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2 V: K1 a2 p$ N e0 V2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.+ }: M* i* b( |4 @2 I) K8 i8 _
+ K# A2 o5 j& j- _6 W"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion./ [/ r0 e% r% A0 K0 r- F+ m/ H; O8 ^
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".6 Q z8 P8 X+ @
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.8 P1 | d4 u3 Z; u: e: Y# t
$ N; S( h1 x, V& _/ u* H' IThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
