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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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8 b) q5 F3 t6 C4 kI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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3 x' J( Q3 @& Z3 ^: b/ jI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:( M) |2 _: R. I

" O& T0 u9 k* a"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"2 ~; D. R8 S/ k8 X# \. ?4 Y+ z" c

0 |  S. T1 L( hI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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- V* O# h* o& o% [. f$ W"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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& F: `" d9 {9 [2 {4 ?7 j- `0 N"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?% b) ^* K( D! `; o

( C5 R( c9 I7 E. X( M3 s' oI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!  V# ]" N1 i2 q- G

0 K  U' i" Z/ l& fI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."& j# U% a$ b7 ]

  Y7 l% O' w& B1 F: T# z8 k8 VSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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# Q4 T$ H# M/ _' YThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.) _$ Q2 g, I1 [% E
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.8 j0 a9 [9 |+ s
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.  B9 \/ V* ~: ]8 e

( G: O4 ~" }, U, z( U"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.* y# \4 s2 E' l6 {' b, o& n

8 _( B: b6 X4 u% B* n0 D8 U& vJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".; ?0 r0 X) v' `5 ~1 \
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.5 ^& M2 ?- u2 N( O5 M
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
1 Q0 s. x+ x; d9 ea young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
2 U, v* s% n- y( Q怎么理解?# [/ Z$ I; [( K! d  t3 k0 ^9 N
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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' ^7 \7 h8 r! C3 z& B不离婚,白头到老
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
3 t0 n' Z4 H3 O3 c' t2 A怎么理解?9 @3 w0 ]3 u* j$ C1 w
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?6 }, Q7 `/ _6 {4 e  {) ^! F8 o
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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