 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.% S/ D7 V! p! A3 N: N
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.# f' y) [" m4 v8 U
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.. z, x* l. [2 w; F0 C+ Z( V
& y* V( K6 J5 O" t) cI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"6 w0 f" U5 a- [+ P; [" D; N6 S
. a8 c2 D7 N7 ^) V1 q* G" {$ EI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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7 b, s! ]$ s5 y6 |; d( W! }And the second one was:2 `; L& d) A- w2 T" @: F
& e+ P# K& C+ J7 }. z"What's the 2nd Amendment?"5 \+ C* ]! ^8 @' c; c3 b. k
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? X V3 x* J8 T* e9 i8 ^: `/ J
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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" B8 E# {) v$ B0 s0 z% j2 g; l+ V: zI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?" ]" V/ J! s/ _- A7 \
( Y9 q+ a9 `) p/ ^* \, iI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"- A) {$ T! G" U0 n6 a; S
6 S3 `. q! T& U: J7 v- ZNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”9 B" B3 C: O: e. c
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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! f- F- a+ s; `/ U4 EThank you very much!3 G+ [7 I* _" \% _& e$ s& ?
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5 q9 G& [2 l5 A2 w+ H0 h w" hImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:$ x: u! p. D F) }; G- ^5 g; z
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.+ h, A; L& T! t% x1 p) i
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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) z6 s2 v, p3 k4 [# |8 J @9 [; l7 n"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.5 t3 i. f0 C/ S( q
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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; X- d2 m. v1 Z% d% J; e8 ~Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.) `) B' q5 a, J+ v8 B. w+ v
1 Q+ q- x* K9 D, @2 RThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
