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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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/ z  @. b7 }' E/ R$ b" ?I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.! S1 q  n0 @4 e8 K1 I: O% R! w

# M! a4 w2 H& s" ~, p% o$ YI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.2 t+ Y" y4 K8 a% t
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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8 a' E" k" {9 l2 H"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:0 L( `! _- K. `# c7 J
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 {) O( I0 z% ]8 d$ U3 |

% ?$ [/ g7 V; [. w, {"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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% c' H" \$ ?/ k/ R  Z. }I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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" n/ r  P: I3 N$ ~" R  V: G1 v9 mI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!' `6 P) y8 G- E7 G5 V7 i8 K6 g9 F7 G
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore./ D. i6 T3 V1 ?' D& n7 T- d" @

( \8 W5 R6 Q5 G. v0 i1 UThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.+ R  ]' b6 C* s5 N# E8 [; a
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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; D- R, O  w8 B6 sJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.- K1 B1 f9 _5 R- E8 @4 W" o
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
- h: b' a8 _& ^a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。. V3 }" v* a& n; P# o$ c" M
怎么理解?+ H6 H" w4 ^; Z
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 - f3 Q) e: c4 M( q5 M  k

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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。; y2 x7 [# Y. u
怎么理解?
; X7 D0 K! H9 B$ `50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?, r" o( s) _& t
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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. L8 t( K  G( O- s$ s" S4 [; v' I我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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