 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.! y6 }- h* O. c- y0 v) E
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.* G, T8 X9 H" P5 }# u h2 G
, x# n) ^) y* }" LI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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( I C+ \" M. R9 i& y: }" ]I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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" p6 ^7 w2 {$ j6 }& \. V+ uI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 h) X) E# K2 R! P2 U/ Q3 I
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?" n/ G, g8 v+ N" G7 {4 S* ^8 n: b
; M" n$ N" u8 o8 z2 H1 Q( n' \I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?, m0 q5 D& F: S2 T* A
% u; H6 q6 ]0 _3 c8 {I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."4 E( p |+ }6 w5 E g9 u8 u
/ W( ^+ ]! {+ T: Z! ISo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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5 l$ B& B1 r0 B% f. D. \Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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3 d8 F( J: o' y+ d! e1 @( cThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.3 w P0 w6 H9 i$ [9 f
2 p/ K% A" v+ n! r& D2 [5 h ]# QThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:0 I. V2 ~& N5 Y3 I) G0 U$ _
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.* p* M6 W6 a9 F
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.: Y5 @7 }1 U4 s" }% @
/ {9 u7 Q' w B- }8 c3 x4 i8 U"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.. |, y7 w' C7 f7 A5 K
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".4 u) r0 m" o: K. h
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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' I& E+ m7 k) b7 x# ^The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
