 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.8 |6 b7 j) p2 O
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you. _) m7 ]! T. m( Z Z
* S; ^$ e# Q& z% tI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:1 j# X2 M3 n" ~) }& M1 N9 y
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"0 [, T8 W, s. |' o
O8 C8 l$ Q+ MI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"$ e+ G/ {/ G. B5 t1 U7 k( K. X
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? y; G. }! r; Z4 Y( a
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"& t. Y8 C x1 N1 l( u/ C2 j* i
6 O1 N' a" {+ c% E4 T/ ~4 C gI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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5 }. }- d% d/ k' oI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."$ h# N3 W( R9 A) M# [4 g; n
# i" Z( u9 Q8 G xSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"% d I# Y8 j$ ~2 u' [
" e4 q) `" W( {; X9 W1 P" m' |; INow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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/ w- M1 B( N* D& ^This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore. h# B+ {$ q' g( W
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Thank you very much!+ `6 q7 U" \/ f0 |" a
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:$ M: o8 M: q. ?& P3 c3 J
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.6 o) M& D) c" a y* L& u
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.' H$ z W& b4 C% `8 E/ ?6 I! _3 j
# q- n4 G7 C9 G+ F j"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.% h+ g/ [3 A1 N2 V) D3 e( J: }
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".) [) f4 w$ B# |
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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