 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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* s/ e$ T+ y# {# S5 F6 m& R1 H" zI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.. ^- L$ z+ `, A: I/ b3 S* q- S
. L+ `( J% \; h8 R: C( SI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:- Q6 q( T( X W8 H) M p; ~7 ^
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 A3 n9 g6 i9 B# q; l i
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And the second one was:
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: m# A. ]9 m2 e% n"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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; S, g9 k) n$ _6 X- TI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? a& f# e4 w8 X
0 r% t/ q& M. d. ]6 }4 g0 T( B"What is Roe vs. Wade?"2 X# p0 d6 U! L4 g, N# D
% W# B _' b8 L$ M1 aI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?4 i2 w4 g9 r" N# i2 N
0 A8 O# @. K+ PI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."* {/ ?/ K* s7 Y3 Y3 q0 ]+ |. w/ `
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?": e% d4 z& u6 a! K+ |& h# i3 _
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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7 z' j* d( P' u( v, Z& { d1 R) JThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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% |9 l+ [6 m$ ?Thank you very much!& X$ p4 ^: Y% ~& v. ~9 @+ D) G
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+ ~7 W0 X o9 b3 SImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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7 ]6 i8 E" w( v7 X4 h& R, L1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.# x7 F# {& H2 a5 Y+ k% o+ a
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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, M' D( E7 [' E% F( p; ~"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.0 R4 x5 I* q" x. Y
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".$ Y5 T$ {/ p7 z- V, j. Y! J
9 E J, D6 N5 w$ h, qRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.4 s% e# z M6 U1 H% Z
9 D8 B' C3 x+ q9 e- E1 SThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
