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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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2 A  V0 h* B6 ^! zI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.. @6 c% `& H; _+ m) \

. z5 J( ?5 U4 o4 E: kI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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7 ^: @. G' B- j$ g8 mI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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3 }: R2 y6 `4 M) x4 Q8 F"Who's Benjamin Franklin?", u2 ]" m- b! j+ z: M8 w1 c* O
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?7 L& O$ Y5 m9 q" A# u3 s+ {: m
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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9 ?5 c7 u, a/ e" \  ^I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 h4 W' Y3 X3 z$ M0 t* V
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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( b( L' m' v& X, y. C' lI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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, P" t/ @' q, I0 `5 ]I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!. f$ V% b5 q" P/ n4 H

# B6 }' X, q1 }3 v; S1 d( qI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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/ F* D0 G! {* P' c1 FSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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8 w4 F( i5 H5 R7 M" W5 GNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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5 k% f$ O- w9 q. |Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:6 {5 C$ _: X$ E. F- ^* k! P
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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6 e1 u) v) ^  z* `2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms./ R  ^) G. j) g( n. S& a. u
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.6 U' H! x: {) i% |+ c

% ?$ P. Q, S; Z0 R# k5 m- \  ZJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
8 g' L5 e8 D+ a& L2 Ba young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
; e" b2 y" U% c" }; Q怎么理解?# \" |4 a1 ^1 {9 D6 j/ @
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。; ]/ n/ K* F) |# [$ d5 B% E4 T
怎么理解?
  t. z% S0 B( a- W  ]& c; o; M50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?& ~5 A. Z1 u# D1 Y3 r
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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5 C# O7 |4 `2 j我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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