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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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$ j( g) b  d! `; X" PI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.* B; o8 ~9 _4 p9 G; O1 h
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"$ U* y8 F, [' q1 o

. r- Z  X2 j! u7 MI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?: a* B$ N6 l# Q' `; X# R' `

, T& X# {. x: z( AAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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4 E# R# O) E# r/ D) V1 y" @"What is Roe vs. Wade?") ?2 {; i& s; O8 b+ I# k
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?" v  j2 A6 T3 `# b0 m
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!* J5 V. y( U$ ]# r& @( `: T

- @! |5 D  Q* j' DI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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2 _+ t7 O( t/ K* v3 |; KSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"+ @5 }+ d+ g2 `9 n

6 T" C8 Z. J: k* p* a8 q: N1 E! WNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”9 \' ^. i6 P8 `4 ^7 }
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!) F7 p  r' g0 x' A" l$ U

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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:: k  V' i* e; ~; L, k8 m+ c6 y
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.4 Q/ W9 J% z% Q

' X) M3 }8 [, ?. b7 @# m# w2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".+ B5 `, m; L4 h+ _2 y8 q6 H
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.- a1 H% h* m2 s" o. \
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 2 j8 z& e/ G& L2 Z1 Y6 M
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
2 s6 ]3 O! K+ V" u5 ?怎么理解?+ q# P. l6 S2 v5 j! d( I8 I$ G
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 . U/ X+ `4 f6 p0 |# i# ]
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。0 j4 [/ P: K5 |8 y/ ^
怎么理解?4 N5 p8 o/ X5 k! c( o* J6 {; X
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
! o7 o" U- t: R: [cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 3 r" C, o; a$ N+ \
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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