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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.) A. G+ V' G  x4 [

0 ^# S, D$ j6 u1 |9 N9 c$ `I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:5 F' E1 n; |2 ]  X$ H

$ c) ~' f  V+ d' S, z. ]! M"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"# @. g: N, h7 z/ l
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 \7 D- ^) O3 F; l
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"8 B# r( \) `: U7 o$ \

) I  u% O9 c$ ], }9 I$ nI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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. e6 h, u  X, x9 @: V3 ~"What is Roe vs. Wade?"  Z& q7 w% d9 v# ]7 B7 s6 ?+ `

7 k% p4 ]+ s4 [* U, v5 DI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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* o! j- o0 K! \  h5 ]7 ZI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."& C3 R# f# O  y2 c" K; a+ z

+ u4 O" D" v0 rSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.# N/ O# C2 N& D- m, c

8 P0 m& }1 A' u' [5 G4 cThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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4 H2 l# V* k7 d1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.! Y' Q- V' X  x, ~* c5 L, G
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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) q; \; B1 q0 ~9 V3 F$ T0 x"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".- S3 _& v. f+ t; b

8 G1 i- p2 r' b1 p; w- K' tRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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8 d1 P# T0 ~4 m; I9 ~# L7 {The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: ! r# f3 B% X, d) ?) G5 u: m
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。- A  u' L: X9 c8 e8 E4 A( m
怎么理解?( n7 F8 ^/ l( ~7 @, y) l& @3 \5 m
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
& T* |2 f% m# U3 q怎么理解?
! ?% B, O. i$ r50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?1 p  B  V6 o. N0 L( v
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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2 N# @) F/ C5 t) |- I1 J& }& ~我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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