 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.( i- i% v( h4 H, x! @4 V1 q' k
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you." B" p; J( H$ ^, T! f
$ L6 f8 D) u/ v' z1 EI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.4 b; h4 w& a- `6 v0 u3 b
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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7 D& h/ _4 L; _! ?7 s: S# c& ^1 E"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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; u. F( c8 J$ {, I6 R0 _- vI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 I9 V W; C) @+ v5 {+ i
" |8 C0 b9 P: i3 i/ IAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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- I, I$ S+ x4 E& QI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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0 a7 G- H5 ~7 Z' @/ R+ g4 P6 lI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?! M# Y- g/ g9 w( W$ _; @7 Z1 A
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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7 Y2 g) z7 B% Q& ?) [Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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) q. T$ J5 F& C+ qThank you very much!
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" c& ?& F p5 Y* z0 d* h7 rImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:0 r. P2 }3 i& `. \3 K3 R9 [. a
- o: @. ] Z/ B3 F2 v) v6 j1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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) E" ?/ [7 s5 P/ x/ H. z"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US. y1 v: Z( ]1 O, H6 Y4 d% }
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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