 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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$ ]) C/ K( P5 u5 d' M. ?I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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( X2 X* H+ k% h1 g5 w4 q5 |0 t0 gI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:8 d# O5 t. F3 r! e
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?": Q, q- L6 w. M- F
( g# }" l$ L- U2 X' p& RI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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2 t' y! d% p& L: rAnd the second one was:. f) ?# {4 Y/ [3 H% u0 y- h9 Q
3 k: P$ r- C6 D3 y7 X, w1 H% N* r"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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7 `6 a- U0 A! NI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?1 D8 e% _, Z2 I/ a
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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" ~' u. ]# t* I! N' z- W8 ~I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?4 I8 z/ C' m3 c0 w" {
% e5 }) { ~1 j# zI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!9 b2 Z m5 g% b9 k* X3 M
) V" {# x. R* [ G7 W mI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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3 g" E' |4 T; ?- O* A: Z- SSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"8 c) l3 {6 o6 E+ y$ \3 K
- @7 U' r/ ?: a9 VNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”9 O9 K: J: @% u' Q9 C- j" Q P
8 D2 I( ]" H& }7 mThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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/ J! M% Q5 n* ~( |Thank you very much!
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3 k% B5 ]! _& _( {- c: OImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.- }3 B. d+ t# t3 t/ p
' I5 @- e2 t% {2 `0 ^! D. E2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.' H! ~8 r/ W# G1 U; b
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.8 X5 v u) E! G! I' f9 e i% B: D
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.6 q( S3 d1 [; M( X/ W% E
3 b0 Q$ _4 N! k! L0 Y2 P2 j: U) V' i2 fThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
