 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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+ a( c, C, n5 t+ S6 `I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.& q" C) Z/ m( I- k/ Z$ S
# A8 {4 \7 F" x" B5 I, x2 kI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.% Y/ g- R5 V4 j+ h
* K# p. L3 y$ j( }' ^! i# N' J4 E; `& jI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:8 ]5 ]1 L+ n8 _! p9 O" w# [# |& K
1 g* X/ |% B4 B"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"+ ?8 i8 E4 f( U% l$ Y/ e7 z
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?- Z* z2 k4 v, f3 k& I9 q- Z; z' o/ [
. E* d; K4 F) lAnd the second one was:: i$ I% f/ Y r3 W* ^* a
: l- [# l" D% ~1 b"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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! \; I" i1 l% b$ f+ @) _2 f"What is Roe vs. Wade?"& y) P6 @2 O7 |" m) i z @
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!6 q/ T" V$ U% [9 R
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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8 m' H' K9 T! `" [' @( OSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"" ]6 ^4 p( t+ m
, U/ G- V; A/ E3 T8 V- gNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”# n/ [& r$ ]3 C* o) M
* V2 a+ S' c2 a5 A7 CThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore." S5 \; T) R b: z. l3 h
" x8 B' a# S* T% j& gThank you very much!9 B3 ~( A# t3 \: z5 V# \- c6 i
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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7 S8 |1 {4 H; J1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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' ~% U* c' Y; {1 U" X+ d# x7 P Y& @2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.: U X( c# r z8 K
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".9 \0 ~/ q( _7 u, C3 i9 E$ J
* d7 y% ^! ~9 w IRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US./ ?9 J0 m; }0 z, B, v: Z
1 z. H9 ?. A3 w/ O2 N% c/ ]4 j KThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
