 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.: S" g! k0 W. _: y
) U. e' K. K) K5 j* x! k& xI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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; T* O! i l% ]" m8 AI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:' Q( N( i* O; z8 Y) U' j
" n- W9 D C: ~: P"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:/ O9 [8 K9 @0 s; O- F' M8 z1 ~
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"# u0 u4 l( s# h$ m9 y+ v
; G' r' S7 ^( u% o& }- V {* y; CI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 t' V) D2 t6 g9 p0 G1 l2 l( ]
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?1 J; [, o2 d4 f( M. F4 H- u/ j
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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5 S8 w$ [# `: j" h1 K0 F3 X) g( eI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?", [" a3 C* D. z& z' ~# i
. N# x0 D$ R# J. n+ }Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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& S6 c/ c6 @3 } fThank you very much!
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7 A3 l! s- f6 X# z, B& pImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:$ `& P" q& _0 |9 R- Q8 q
2 I6 t) O) L" o- ~- J+ B' J1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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4 L. b8 H2 I# t1 v ]9 c* t2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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+ Y) {9 t2 w' a& [# K& ?"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.. s5 w5 s4 f, X4 z( ]) x3 j
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.2 i' ~* O4 G1 b
" ^9 \, y3 L1 G0 P7 F- t! BThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
