 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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/ T( i+ `- o$ C4 ]7 _) m+ hI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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! V0 z( |6 n+ u9 M2 k. MI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:) T( ?# n. [3 B6 Q; G9 L ^
* W |' L; ~9 v. F"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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- w1 x4 M& F# j/ n' M5 f) `I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?% V0 b1 }2 O7 v; a3 U4 u- W$ Z" L" q
$ W3 n, @9 a) [; a& ]6 \And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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& s7 ^) U+ I. }# ZI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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8 N0 ^: r' S8 M# x! u6 `: X$ g& E"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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: i# \2 j! d1 b; K$ ~, r" JI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?! c3 L }* }4 p8 c" j% U/ \
% j$ |) N0 e+ ]2 uI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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* J0 t: v0 W) K" C/ z" ?! g3 H/ e0 KI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."! U. `+ S5 W% q. X! @. ]* t
& M' H/ w$ B+ x- n* BSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?". x7 E* O$ }' E8 C+ R
8 m0 F" O; V; |6 K. xNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore./ h# W q/ k+ |! u1 w1 s% z% c' ?0 U+ F
& G6 F, T2 n/ ^9 U* g; yThank you very much!) w3 ~8 _9 V x0 Y3 `
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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/ N3 C0 l3 |8 [ j) V# g9 {2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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3 b4 i* G$ S2 a+ U. m" q+ e"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.; p, Q+ ]4 ?) o: V* _
+ C8 {' u6 {1 \# ^9 ]- vJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".9 q% o9 U' U# Q. Z. a7 O$ \6 Z$ P6 h
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.2 d9 ^* v$ N: b$ [4 a( S( d$ ~
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
