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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.8 |6 b7 j) p2 O
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.  _) m7 ]! T. m( Z  Z

* S; ^$ e# Q& z% tI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:1 j# X2 M3 n" ~) }& M1 N9 y
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"0 [, T8 W, s. |' o

  O8 C8 l$ Q+ MI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"$ e+ G/ {/ G. B5 t1 U7 k( K. X
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?  y; G. }! r; Z4 Y( a
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"& t. Y8 C  x1 N1 l( u/ C2 j* i

6 O1 N' a" {+ c% E4 T/ ~4 C  gI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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5 }. }- d% d/ k' oI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."$ h# N3 W( R9 A) M# [4 g; n

# i" Z( u9 Q8 G  xSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"% d  I# Y8 j$ ~2 u' [

" e4 q) `" W( {; X9 W1 P" m' |; INow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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/ w- M1 B( N* D& ^This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.  h# B+ {$ q' g( W
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Thank you very much!+ `6 q7 U" \/ f0 |" a
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:$ M: o8 M: q. ?& P3 c3 J
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.6 o) M& D) c" a  y* L& u
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.' H$ z  W& b4 C% `8 E/ ?6 I! _3 j

# q- n4 G7 C9 G+ F  j"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.% h+ g/ [3 A1 N2 V) D3 e( J: }
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".) [) f4 w$ B# |
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
大型搬家
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 5 @' g& z( @& D
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
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7 Y' @% s8 e2 F% R( J6 {1 E  U50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
5 _. i) ]: V0 e4 Y4 L! t  w1 @7 S怎么理解?
) s) r  a' x% n  Q% i50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
% X3 e0 A1 O' `$ K! p& Rcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 * S  {# g  C6 ~. Q" O

" G9 K5 @; R; v! ^我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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