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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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! q6 X9 x) y( ~I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.2 l5 n9 L# K! r& y2 C
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.9 N% ^9 |9 H) j6 H3 Q% P  r
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:+ Z4 Q, V  u  y* `3 [6 R

6 ^+ K9 w& x: e9 t7 k% o"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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5 a. ]" e6 ]- _8 m7 u7 }! \) Q/ MI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?' v* l- M3 A7 v# F- F4 l/ @

8 A5 ]# T4 Z/ P: i, g6 L5 MAnd the second one was:
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3 Q$ i- j/ z) R) w4 L: L! H"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?5 F+ L# d' _# [" V

% t% x9 \* T" ~3 Q! K3 n9 L: o"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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5 F# A2 N& M8 |1 HI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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4 a( z7 l  _1 Q$ l" j! V: qSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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. p2 z5 c' N/ i% S/ i# z3 ZThank you very much!6 r9 d0 }' w3 i6 ?

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% o2 g( j2 b4 q+ U; zImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:7 L% {8 n& _- i; k. h
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.7 Z/ }0 K' ?4 ~/ l* P8 W( {
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.* `& k; U; A( \( p
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.& Y6 A3 K$ P8 p1 }* V

8 d4 ]: Z7 m2 S' m) @& ZJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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) e" C1 N; }# i* ^/ g) CRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.; {- E1 O$ m* l' z, b

, P0 G6 p- z# ?- k1 `( ?. f" {The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 3 a' s0 E  F  P% p# p
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
% y/ N. r) |! d+ B4 O. ]怎么理解?) u' h3 E/ i& @+ ]2 e! F5 F
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。' C  J9 A8 h9 g$ y
怎么理解?6 G: s6 {) U: N5 A
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?/ r/ G# x& G4 {" Y, H% O+ I
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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, R" x$ {3 _* p, R9 t) T' G* P我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 ' f9 W' z7 T3 \4 A8 X

% G/ ^+ U6 T, f# Z& o1 l) k/ D7 i我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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