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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.$ p- ]+ x7 V# r  Z

# O: h5 J8 F: M+ @- o) Y  }3 _I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.- g% S5 G- F+ |" E

- F( p3 m4 A/ {" o7 `I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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* X5 O" Y8 @, |2 g+ b' E5 SI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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$ M. d9 x/ n3 }* VAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"% s6 m3 B6 E6 u6 b9 W: ], ~

* i4 q/ I- a) Z) DI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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) p: D* O" U  I% T"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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& m! x+ }' e4 G* W) a. B' p8 kI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"5 P" z' Z8 b* d/ H/ `. {

* d; n' e5 P6 y0 Q; zNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”5 X( n: r* _- @5 P; y

3 F/ u6 \5 }5 @* uThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.3 i/ G0 s! k! B! o
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Thank you very much!
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==========================
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3 D! |( O2 I3 W8 o8 {) dImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:) v1 \! u6 z" F1 m8 [

3 Y9 u0 y" H* ?2 i# y3 H1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.! {3 J1 Y% v  N% L
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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6 P7 }9 Z- n3 V: }! mJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".0 c- |3 u3 F9 m- k' b" T
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.+ }  e; x( r2 ^" e, E
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
1 @  B# o. W9 Da young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。) K/ ^- k' ?# M. f
怎么理解?
3 o7 e0 Z$ N  O* r. Z% m' d50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 6 u$ j0 C0 t. P; C

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7 ?1 R# z! V, v) u) Z不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。, S+ }- K$ p3 s- C% b
怎么理解?
" l9 s9 n5 f1 q; n! K# @50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
/ h3 }. s6 b2 c2 _& t( g+ acyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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+ Q/ D3 i/ ^" z* o/ J2 Z我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 8 W$ o/ {2 `- t- |

* }2 `* |+ O6 ]我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
大型搬家
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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