 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.+ N Y7 J5 }4 B& F
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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; ~! ~: y. v0 ~1 {1 G+ ]I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.' V8 r; O$ z( z
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:2 m& V9 G, ^0 F9 m
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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) t# K, {0 a4 f b: k, z2 II was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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, q# r. q4 W: kAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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2 D" r1 ?% S9 {4 MI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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7 f& [! c& e4 v8 m4 sI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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! }( S) V$ \, [1 u5 ~; o0 }# g+ OI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."- C, }2 F" Q3 C7 j$ T E3 v, [
5 z+ ~. U4 G; d& D1 x+ ~+ X+ H1 z" lSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"+ P. m' H4 `! H) k. f9 _" z
6 B+ p* ` g5 sNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.” y7 Q9 x) L; I$ ^' Q
/ L; C4 E0 b) F9 lThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.3 Z" O) a% Z+ Y& i# d, y) w% n. \& S
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Thank you very much!
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m0 C6 C9 o2 d& Z8 f' M6 ~/ _Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:, F/ T& Z3 L1 e+ S! S; n1 H: P+ S2 ?
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.0 o( A/ k0 e2 Y( }( B# K, H
" a0 S) A0 T% P& R: I8 ?* M+ o" i2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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5 X6 I6 O) j$ g, H9 N/ i4 ?* f"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion." K7 z3 O; E& B
7 h1 v2 x# W. I/ wJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.1 u9 H8 \% C. O( F' D- p8 G( _2 t
$ \! D5 O4 ~* w' KThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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