 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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5 G) v0 ]" A* H- hI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.& }' X* Z: M. ^% `
8 v3 K7 C3 l$ q( w/ a9 ?I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.1 O2 B; \, O7 {2 s8 n
, |9 O1 i! n% \0 _. g& yI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"" E) Q0 ~8 r7 U# S! B! ~
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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, u8 Z, Q' G- @/ G( x4 c$ E1 s"What's the 2nd Amendment?"! p4 K- O% O6 v5 R$ x; L
o5 [/ V1 q) d5 K% MI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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" s, U1 f& E( x2 T! c9 b"What is Roe vs. Wade?"! W1 X8 d# @4 L2 }0 ?5 S7 H3 m
* A" [$ L) A# Z- ?4 M" pI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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+ f$ t! u8 j) D0 m: ?- VI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!) p; g1 |( ^, q n O
& n( x( x4 [/ pI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen.", [& S# c1 M: q5 g/ g& i1 ]0 X& Q
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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% p9 a" E. ?; p7 @. z8 @* ZNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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! @# G; H6 [ A" C. NThank you very much!
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v8 D' A- u& V4 E- ~& I8 xImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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' w% z3 i. E" i0 P" U* ?/ K1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.& f- ^" ?# g& M. a2 B; d& e* E3 b2 q
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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* s4 k7 W' M+ z1 _/ k, TJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".5 s0 h, D1 Z- I! }1 b |
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
