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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.0 Z& V! l. q  ^+ K

9 Q2 O4 a! g7 L5 M1 T' YI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.3 U1 f5 o0 y5 G" g" F
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.8 l4 `# O" x( a2 E) I

0 R- v# d! Y' Z4 YI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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% Q6 K( c, d( c: ]3 s+ O0 o( sI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?5 `5 K7 n4 e+ `: j2 M$ r' S
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?& r5 a$ H3 m1 \4 v

# o+ _! e0 K( l  O( \% H5 B& r"What is Roe vs. Wade?"- n7 B6 |% J. g0 E! Q
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?# k( t1 X" U: z+ O; u
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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. N5 L0 q" g( \( U, n+ x. v7 y+ FI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."/ v& w. D  J/ M% R' n; K0 P
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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. }. r* @. v; f" [; `) Z  \2 [Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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& x5 X. D) ^6 ]6 q# p  KThank you very much!# S1 I! ]# f; U2 i
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==========================: x. K" [( f! s- B" j( _

5 T! ]8 z- p; D$ `8 c1 i2 I& ]+ A1 fImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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& L% O' E8 l2 @. D! j$ n" K0 g1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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( A; g4 I6 x( K2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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2 M) y  L# b' a"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.$ ]$ f( Y/ m/ Q4 v( V7 v* ~

1 S7 h* E3 ^) R; yJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".4 t8 T& N; J5 Z: O+ y" L9 P. S2 m
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.* C$ z. x* O+ A  t# d3 Y
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 9 N( ^# B) J9 K2 y! q+ S# u
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。( o" b' B: W# T( [) |0 q
怎么理解?7 }+ y$ k4 F& a* Y* t: F$ m
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
大型搬家
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
# t* w% k! M! X( Y怎么理解?
" y4 W, C/ v' _2 r50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?' }& V' b* g0 J$ x  x# s5 Y
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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! J5 [$ h/ j5 T' F" F. O2 Z: `' N" F我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳 1 X0 i: o2 v. X1 W/ l) j7 m

# k4 x0 x6 R( @8 {' @% N我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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