 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.' i2 Z0 H! E7 s$ d
( `* k! q% e# `. K. ^/ |I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.6 R0 o1 h L5 W, ?
& W% w' R4 B" Q3 @# II'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.; M* `: ^! u' ]) c S- _
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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% G% D) Y) ?4 j7 F# g$ M6 T"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?: `1 F/ c! ~' d' S
r: u% P+ `: C$ OAnd the second one was:: c! K/ s/ i" E( `& y
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"/ `6 t9 h4 g F. I
; y. b$ b! ?* f& D; KI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?# ~8 ^/ N) G* O# \7 f) A, a4 |
1 s2 o+ u/ f4 N, Q"What is Roe vs. Wade?") J- K; z) J% i- e" O" R
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?% }8 y3 J4 Y Y- Y% }
8 v6 }0 O" \/ ^: M# r1 }8 uI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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4 a! o" ^8 L2 K; T5 ]7 d' p; mSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"7 f" F1 G( {: D# d$ c9 z
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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7 f, p3 s y7 O; gThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.8 g! P o; ~& o/ }7 }: g6 t
8 c( G2 S9 Y8 M }" r! uThank you very much!
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7 c8 s( I: S4 r( b* O9 hImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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4 w+ ^; ]" v5 S; @"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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4 a, Z% i5 A# N: cJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.0 a7 P! J9 K* b# x) |$ v6 C
& N y) Y( y4 a, c) {) WThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
