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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.0 V; T) P/ D, [. o8 i/ T
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.3 E5 l3 S* Y/ C; Y+ h% U" ?

/ r2 f, R! j! A% B$ K* [I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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- H* B3 M8 v. i5 L. I2 ?+ ZI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:# h5 @$ x) W) q1 L/ I2 k/ F, [

# o6 E/ ]% Y) o$ k  L4 Q"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"& T6 |4 J) E( B; |, M- J  x4 o
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?8 {% n- h3 W/ f

/ Y. I. z3 m8 p* R: HAnd the second one was:4 b) F, |% Z0 g
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?* g8 w9 w3 P* ]% g! z& X

/ |& W2 r: X5 Y' ?" U"What is Roe vs. Wade?"% P: S" g/ W7 O" p4 j* I
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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- v' @# Y6 E: R# Y- C5 FI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!) s( [) S# f, O3 h, L1 P, V+ H
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."9 p9 K  q! L+ }6 S( W, \
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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6 h1 B! V2 q8 u2 U% ZNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”& w+ t8 L( O! |0 l) c9 t
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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7 X+ V* I8 y3 x* f$ iThank you very much!+ M, S8 g0 }4 t0 j
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:  T4 c7 L5 e* Q8 M, J' A

4 y* {  m4 H5 `8 [' m; b# y; b, D1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.3 q2 o0 i4 K$ s" x7 F! s! ~
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.9 M% s/ N. [" \" Y+ Q1 d0 L: E

. _  z! a0 ?# d2 k# S  D% i"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.$ j5 N0 N* B- I5 c0 ]! H
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".8 y( S. U9 u4 n3 Q

; j5 |! y9 v( fRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.1 D9 t5 R5 g# X6 a& [8 k
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
9 l; \3 r: T* K$ v6 i: ?7 aa young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
. n' s# z( e: k8 n怎么理解?5 q5 M" K& V) S+ }/ g( h- }
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
  U/ @! K* w  Q  G$ C, J怎么理解?
' h+ X8 }1 w/ w4 ]8 T+ f) g50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
% ~- A/ c$ L0 X+ A# Acyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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, G, X8 y. `1 `我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳 2 |- x2 C5 ^4 }) V9 v( C% v
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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