 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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6 I( W+ X( `+ C% J5 T8 [I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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( a" l- o% c5 [' V3 oI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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& ?, s' @% p# U3 E$ }5 i"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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( j @2 _# V5 L1 T% _9 UI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ [2 P5 H* P H3 e9 @# W+ g2 ]
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And the second one was:8 Y9 W2 j, `9 _$ ^" z: Q5 |
^$ q! |+ G$ H1 ]' W8 M) Q0 s9 h"What's the 2nd Amendment?"( D8 b+ ?6 g( l
- m4 l, n) ~" ^+ m) v ], b' J6 V fI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?6 N# g5 Y9 I+ s& `5 D7 x7 _
) y( N* }; n( X9 u"What is Roe vs. Wade?", y$ Y1 b5 T/ h. b" [3 Q( m
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?5 _7 N. z+ S- {6 m
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!2 k9 X9 i; o+ E3 V" E( T
5 n/ W1 S) B; }# nI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."3 K r' s6 f! L% j" Z+ @! z8 D
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”, E% |1 q2 G( P) V& X$ [* \& w
5 b- E& }8 h7 l' N% CThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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) n* o4 b# R! t' KImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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. F! c7 W1 ?! p5 N/ `6 a9 y1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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- d4 n) e8 q# u: N) `* v1 V( c' [% _) g2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.$ [/ R( N' z, j- m' L/ f7 u5 Z+ j
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.' L; ]( @" v# i- h G* a
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States"." @6 T) Q+ v% w8 K1 `! v3 s5 a
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
