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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.3 y+ X- O) h9 L1 z" L; A1 L/ N

' m+ b' K- v: V) H6 c; G2 cI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.4 k* _2 E  {% a$ E$ `  ^

2 k" I; y7 X0 I: r# T" u1 @I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years." @+ u1 @. u1 U% k8 L/ l8 `! o/ \
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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9 e7 Q* u2 {$ z3 G5 t/ D! t' r- M"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"5 r& f; u# _3 c2 N  |
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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1 ]1 _* g" f! z/ f5 G5 |- ?"What is Roe vs. Wade?"1 `: j) S5 M) _$ |; H

+ U3 c( k- [  r# _5 N* WI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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( x6 k4 Q1 c  [) \, B, b/ B2 p* LI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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! L' k; O- J6 ~5 w9 X! s: ?5 bI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."- b5 L$ }1 x% c
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"8 S" X8 O5 \4 s- D+ y
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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& B- H) s0 y( R4 k5 aThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:; P% y% a4 }! w" C. ~8 F7 o/ H
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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$ X9 ~7 b4 s" T% x& _/ L4 |2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.2 |/ I" Y  w$ k

0 p: C+ U5 l$ ~3 T+ t"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.( o, @( _3 u5 o) Y* F" I9 t. g& n

; @  @$ u$ C! p* \Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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3 R/ Z) `6 F* w+ m+ z+ r# `' PRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: : Z. F! B+ l% q' `2 h+ j2 L5 L8 D9 G
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。% m# |4 d& r) l- P. ]: h
怎么理解?8 v! v) L0 f/ `$ m" Y6 p
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 ; p0 E! c( Q9 M1 @3 W7 N  n: V
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
: O) j: H# E" p4 [1 @; ^9 d) R2 X# J7 Z怎么理解?- t1 _0 H* q; v5 }
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
4 ?( G. r, ~$ ~3 W1 v' h7 K3 Scyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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$ B0 A! z! L* M! \: \2 u+ Z我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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