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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.& }/ L( ]' L( i, o; x6 S# z: {

7 M, g2 q9 R8 i( A+ @  fI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.9 s/ S4 O) K% ^1 C& U
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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4 T$ ?( j! E# Y1 E# II worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:' S9 W* r8 W$ {7 b

, ?* O/ V3 W# U/ P$ m* c- G"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"! N$ A' D$ r+ i7 j2 _2 n
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 u# J9 k+ W/ e' d1 m9 r) w+ |

, Q! H! W( e# z3 A) _9 S) y4 uAnd the second one was:
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3 n5 @- g7 h4 O3 J( e3 q# X" a7 m' c"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?+ `+ H" z7 j) f: ?7 r2 k

; M/ {0 }5 l2 _4 @  }: o"What is Roe vs. Wade?"" P8 N) d' ~0 ]5 @- P( F0 @8 Y* Y

1 _0 m% }4 N0 e$ ]I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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. w) ^: n- f9 p1 f; W* e) R4 gI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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9 P. t, G" Q$ m) |. C: {I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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3 I; @( Q1 k9 |Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”6 n( U( l% B" D$ E! i: u
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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" X3 s% T1 U9 x: UImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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- W5 m$ u4 q6 r; `& O! x"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.$ {! [( Z# }, t' m1 E
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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% c) m  a0 s: p! w# ORoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.& L; D: M  I$ Q3 _, J, i
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
: o% ?- b" K. b- C; ga young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
' ^) ~9 W! w5 W6 ^怎么理解?
& {3 c. C- d2 m5 _5 [- q50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 2 c' M! j. e; ]( e3 Q3 y
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! p: N0 z. t% \' ?1 c不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
9 z2 O( v3 ]- i6 ~8 \2 g6 F怎么理解?
8 ^" k# ^9 F! ~0 h6 o2 v& W% s& `50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
/ c# [. O) d7 T; E' mcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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& A% w$ m, _7 d4 F4 p我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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