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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.4 I3 u; H9 t, `8 r# _0 p! S
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.9 g2 ?9 p+ F% k

  `  i) \3 \" u7 b; zI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.0 k$ P% G( q4 n$ g4 R

# z; ?% J4 ^6 A/ d- u. h3 NI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"- K; }. R1 U7 V' l
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?% Y3 k' R' W; o7 s
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?5 u9 n- F# @( ?3 [
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!& K2 U7 {8 F6 f, V6 N

: l: Z# D" @2 G2 C' `: rI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."4 H, l( C4 G0 b! z4 I' d+ X" d% U

/ T" r. L9 j' c/ q; N  J$ x6 [$ s) c+ qSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"9 }0 T  w: S7 }# ^, \1 T

9 m5 j# a. f3 s) VNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”) U& k) j0 P8 k' }, |( N

5 {  E: S  q( E; ?8 [6 e1 JThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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0 V: [& y8 B4 ?Thank you very much!
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7 U; a7 V/ Y) z: i4 d1 H* [Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:& _1 D1 `' G9 n

% p/ F0 T8 e+ U7 v$ f- t1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill./ f9 f4 j. m! ?

& |+ B  F# y- u6 {1 P$ T2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.' t3 ]$ e, ~' h6 y4 ]

4 N( ?: k4 S. x% h) m+ A" t1 j"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US./ j* O( l1 y. }& v+ d
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: ; V! V- t2 [$ g! @  g8 x
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
大型搬家
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。; I( O: P, {+ H, Y' u- n
怎么理解?9 C7 p6 v: g# g; _# E% j
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。" x( E! r6 s; ^% L2 j8 O0 Z
怎么理解?$ a- F8 C9 F4 j0 v; F0 {/ l1 \- O. T
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
& k0 E3 i" T: V1 ?6 |, Pcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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' \* |4 h' |5 Y" U我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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