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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe." e+ C5 B* T2 e8 P

. W" i' [: x- s+ r! JI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.4 o+ K! B' @+ I! ]9 L8 o
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.9 M+ F. e% U5 J7 ]& Z

$ h; d" e, Y8 c9 kI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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0 g% o% V- [4 `4 b7 m5 z6 l" L# U* U"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"2 @+ I0 B1 l, U

# M4 J+ A2 _, c- _1 E1 Q4 kI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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) }3 K! ]; Q+ I' }And the second one was:: z2 Y6 o  `- E# A9 x, V, Y
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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5 S( s7 d1 X" |5 w3 G7 U"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!  i+ a1 T. @. F: t/ k- G! Q
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."0 f, z) C# i1 _3 t$ g/ u- h
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"4 C" [# ?) u% f2 D/ \* d

  F$ k& E* n! p1 |" bNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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+ X" [" C, d- i) k$ F) M0 R  |5 D1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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2 A0 p- s1 v$ f, l; U2 E"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.* p9 Y# c& a5 E+ y% Q) W

' O+ d# N) b0 ^' f" c0 s' W$ @Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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# [8 A4 C6 o  q* e' w' hRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
+ l7 o0 J4 U; K2 A) j. ra young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
, K! u. ^- N) n: H怎么理解?
* F3 ^) I; @  r5 {) H6 V50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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$ a. a3 o8 Z8 W" T3 C不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
+ c; F  P7 s' t  s& x5 V* h怎么理解?  k9 T+ B  L! _; [$ |  ]
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?, ]/ @* N; x" ?0 t7 z( Y+ \
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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