 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.7 f! C3 p: v6 g. K2 _5 i
% _! W' z8 n0 QI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:% I1 t5 _ x; I" Y2 m& r5 w2 }
2 L5 H& I1 g5 X- S4 v7 k/ Q"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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* j k, C" L! w: _$ o6 m; O; kI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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% X( @2 o- `: D' x0 wAnd the second one was: F/ l6 V. z; E
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?". r1 E8 G# |% ?' j5 a
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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* o) q0 T2 X1 H4 c0 `5 n% qI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!: ~$ E, ~2 U( o5 ?: l5 j
& B8 \$ p" Z# \$ H8 z( gI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."6 n: W/ V& H8 W; T
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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% J4 @9 ^) s: kNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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4 y+ T+ n, P( N8 b5 j/ aThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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( a0 ^9 j4 o) b2 w( y ]1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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. [% D+ `6 G5 \) A! d2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.0 j, W0 A9 e9 C$ u
- {+ h3 u( y4 d4 [' B' }: f$ X7 n- y"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".1 l1 _+ ^, q$ Y S; _; @
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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