 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.9 w* t! X* m* w$ K3 w5 u
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.: x* ^' ?. U1 H% k% b6 C& h
4 c5 @7 Q/ F* l; I; v) ?I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:. N0 W" I, ^* d2 i: o7 X d
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?" o8 d7 p9 a) X1 D7 J
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?, P7 x6 u- D( d$ w$ _9 t) X
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And the second one was:3 [5 S! ^; t" d) [, Q
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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0 Y3 U$ Z; d4 `8 X3 mI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?1 D& x, p5 y5 I
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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2 T1 V6 ?# p) o, tI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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S; K! H9 `. s" [% aI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"! Z6 u+ {; M2 m: p5 h& P; F9 ^
' t9 J) l6 H9 s- hNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”) ]6 `/ X0 X$ q# ~+ z/ V
% j: i- l! s7 b( D/ qThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!$ ?, {* Y# d, S) K. i- D/ O& m
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:+ b. [$ y$ y, \5 l, E
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.* g7 B. u0 o9 Y P. {3 \' A* T/ A* g
# \5 t/ F; P3 \% p' M8 R2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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& u6 D2 [2 c- t/ @: T, Q. W"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.6 e, k7 C: k5 S8 `! w* u
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.& I- [8 U8 r0 i6 a. n% |- i0 u
0 i' c/ w5 Y I; L: `6 d" r- `, nThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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