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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.% \9 W, h9 c& f+ p

! j, a2 b! B4 pI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.) J9 n; y+ F0 \! O7 X% U, ~# ?
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.  @) z4 _" N6 i1 D7 ^) d. X5 u
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 Y! ?( v- D8 T5 q
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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6 ~/ W' Q' z' IAnd the second one was:
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2 }; f, K* _; V6 r"What's the 2nd Amendment?"" W8 a. L0 f' V% f1 {$ {
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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6 T4 H/ ]/ V) w2 CI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?3 A  r  Z- P, O7 e, s) \4 `
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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1 M/ H4 ?. [; N( gSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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8 a2 N6 P* f! a# XNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!" L( b- d; [3 Z1 q
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:  Q* |8 n9 \8 [9 q) @
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.$ b* ~, w, g: l9 A# H' z

' x5 [& K2 s6 F% W! A& ^* L. f8 FJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.. M; V8 c, U" ^) H9 x$ F5 A' p

# R( S2 Y, Q( P" u, EThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 0 O/ |6 k$ D% q: }' p
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
# ^( C9 h/ L; i怎么理解?
$ [4 X: J( x0 a6 G3 d7 [; {50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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& r" \  K4 b. @( X0 r' y不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。, k% n$ [, t" e! A6 [/ ^2 F
怎么理解?1 k% D, A7 s6 g$ D
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?! X" z1 _) p+ c0 x2 b; s
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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* T5 `- n/ u! z% M3 J- i我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
理袁律师事务所
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