 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you. [8 ^4 e* L* p3 R) n
8 `2 k" _9 R6 k8 ?& l* G" QI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?* p/ r) [2 c4 t" x/ R4 H
7 b k! z; N" R: SAnd the second one was:# p6 D) b. b, I
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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9 v; e# }7 O/ w7 z0 y! m( b- q& P. tI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."$ P( l- [& m& i3 R
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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$ T5 D F4 y6 l4 h4 iNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”) f7 }$ M0 i" y; |! Q- B
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!2 C" M( K2 C; [% k* z' p R! N
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:/ X0 h0 |- W- S* R) X# V
. u4 F, L0 `" ~% K! P& h1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.9 Y1 n c/ E+ i4 N d2 d+ f$ ~
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.. @% |) W! P% [. `' e
" b( J% E, D) H6 p5 Y+ hJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".6 p* D0 n! k" X0 z5 Z
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.) l: W& [5 E2 W2 A8 D) q! Y
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
