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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.# {, \5 R! d7 Q: |& I7 _2 f' p/ A: ~
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.( O6 @5 S( Q# g
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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4 Q2 M0 l' N( r, K"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"' C$ _! j% g7 x3 \- c1 y; }
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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& \' \- [, `4 {/ K! c) BAnd the second one was:
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1 c, @; J) Q8 ]' X: g% \2 D"What's the 2nd Amendment?"$ V- X+ V6 |6 O! X( S$ u
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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, M, H% [( l, l1 \"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?, Z3 D( e& v) d$ x5 d! z2 Y
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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% j6 O3 z/ e' b; E5 B5 LI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."* b( ?  |: _3 d5 ]' U

5 P  A, n- z- a5 w# Q  f" H4 hSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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7 V2 D# ~1 e$ z: o: W/ l+ S9 i  v0 YNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”) O3 e5 h5 Q/ Z$ E5 T8 f" _
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.0 a- q, b4 O  q. t
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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# G5 z/ P) Z4 f6 j' F$ v2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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9 e7 `3 ]( E" @* E1 ~5 r! ["Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.2 B9 |( {/ g( {& w2 c

9 n. ~! |# r% u4 y' E! E/ HJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".+ N, z+ R3 k* Y$ ?6 Q5 y
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
! }# ~% T# @8 C9 E5 da young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。  m% y' V. ?$ r. b2 D
怎么理解?
: L+ E; Q; |! g7 C! B7 P50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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9 I' ~6 F; ~' ?. @2 `不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。' Y, Z6 L2 e( T- d$ @
怎么理解?
% y3 z, v% S6 B/ z50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?* o# ^: R* v. W* ]
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 ' b8 j- g! K& X
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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