 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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. N' S0 `5 ]+ W8 t) C% D" tI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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8 M: q4 H3 `- M# k- e- LI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.( o5 S! q+ l5 W0 U" ~' I; O! H" E ?
7 ^( ?4 |6 ?/ cI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 ]+ e- G/ o& d, q; @
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"+ O7 _% G/ [; U9 n
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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5 Y2 M$ Y$ [3 h8 q9 dAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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' [4 M0 m7 K; g; WI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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: [3 ^4 ^& \' K/ m+ p, ?) ^I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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- o: b. j9 |4 |0 c6 mSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.& N5 ]5 c. z9 I1 E% X) l% U
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Thank you very much!: S/ D% T; z' y
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.4 W4 S- i. r. C& |" e# a7 L
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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) u% l5 j8 E* ?+ ^Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States"., E4 `0 u9 X4 f" A, k6 ^5 F& [
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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4 b" ]6 v# ]% ^! R* G! O7 o7 |The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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