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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.) S. V, @9 b, C/ l5 V7 `

' B& o" S5 ^. U. F( PI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you./ o" C) u6 l* s2 F) O  o2 a% y1 F
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.  V/ J2 ^+ ?0 v3 g

, Q/ s1 [$ L1 \; s$ iI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:9 _# _' k2 Q" @8 y3 L3 z- h* C
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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* Q/ Q2 m. B5 M( kI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:" g0 ?, ]0 G: j# r
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"7 _5 P6 I2 e& r  |( `7 Z5 y, B# r3 H9 G
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?6 W+ c1 t- N+ a* X! ^- [8 _0 m7 G
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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# S+ b7 _' b7 @# F4 `7 VI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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0 c1 H& M9 ^, A+ a/ X6 BI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!9 m! r( [5 j& d3 v) s3 _5 g

7 g/ L* p: ~" x5 b( x6 ?; `I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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3 h& O/ a  x5 c; u* j6 OSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* _' ^- T7 x6 R- E$ |
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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4 l  g& |, c3 k5 kThank you very much!
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, o8 l6 ?( M% C9 u1 T) eImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:3 d8 C2 F, ?! J' a7 o. d

) y; g) y4 [2 ?8 i& c1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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# H8 R+ |9 R# I& }" X2 |5 a2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.% u) g3 x6 k5 D* p0 v9 q

( z* g  C& a# m"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".7 J/ T% S2 N. h$ {$ ?8 J
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.* A- k/ ?+ Y' |2 p' B8 Y* b

: a& V, N! E  p% Q* @# j  R. ^. dThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
9 S9 s$ O: }/ o8 O+ Sa young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
% R7 V' Q$ L2 \7 @怎么理解?: R$ v$ z6 E( R: l
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 0 \7 @9 R, i+ t
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
. |2 y8 W; b6 E' V6 g怎么理解?# }$ q) y* t0 s. Z- b! z& V
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
! O! ~% n7 W0 \cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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  f4 |( ?1 V' f我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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