 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.! Q- \. S9 Y4 }
" C. x, d. e& }" | v. {# TI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
; }5 s5 z# J+ Z! n( c( V, k2 F3 ]8 X5 L, h1 P
I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
: e0 S5 l( `5 T& z9 e
3 O h5 l! _" t: G6 ~4 d* O/ G, DI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:) |8 s; W2 n5 [$ {
3 _: k& ~" z% @5 h0 o. w5 X2 |9 d) `
"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"; [9 Q$ q1 W# x" R1 V7 B- @; F$ T
3 M+ h* Z/ o* R8 }5 ]) I" w- T+ BI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 A: Q Q; o) b5 p% e) u4 l
; ^1 V- G3 _" h+ Q: Q# t( ^And the second one was:
$ t# H6 Q, ?: X' K6 M( k) p& F
"What's the 2nd Amendment?"% Q, w/ C7 p b
; X" L& l# U' }# r) s
I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
2 [) p7 ?/ T0 D; M: C5 c
/ d6 t- x! g# i% d4 {"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
9 c! v- W- r2 B- l j' s9 @( q8 `+ _' u
I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States? a7 v# l* O5 Y% u& ]' K2 {0 H
5 F( }8 q8 L& f5 I/ c
I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!( e. s/ I) b; J4 z
: X( G+ T4 M. s3 y
I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
U: r C% I$ }4 h5 w. f" c8 q Z1 K% m4 K2 X4 s+ P# ^
So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
3 ~3 V' O: q/ s2 a4 Z1 p; e, e' A# i( |& h5 Q! }" A1 Y8 r
Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
: B- ]: F7 P; U6 N
8 `4 K( y) T& h# |1 U: s; t" m' [This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.- M! n' f* J& G* u
7 [* J: T5 h) |- q) ? |
Thank you very much!, K2 l( |3 Z; K( p T
. x6 N/ r- V3 c: v9 ^9 l6 L, J
==========================
9 X l& D3 g9 ]# E. E2 `
1 u0 `$ H3 N. E% Q6 FImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:* `; J. R9 R" t) Z9 a
/ C, A/ W/ t3 I6 h: H1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill., T5 [0 r' K( T
/ a, E% k; O( g/ s+ m! z2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.# H! {% ]& H( |
" {* h8 q1 Q. `1 ~"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
* k7 e" F8 ~! P8 t2 m: @ S. Z8 R
4 [6 |: E! k, U0 ]4 g; }Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".8 F; r2 {7 n) u* {
+ H0 m' K- v2 [8 C8 Z. nRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.$ w% V; P C/ x
: }/ h6 _6 i2 G9 s: A& L( H
The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
