 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.) S. V, @9 b, C/ l5 V7 `
' B& o" S5 ^. U. F( PI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you./ o" C) u6 l* s2 F) O o2 a% y1 F
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years. V/ J2 ^+ ?0 v3 g
, Q/ s1 [$ L1 \; s$ iI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:9 _# _' k2 Q" @8 y3 L3 z- h* C
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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* Q/ Q2 m. B5 M( kI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:" g0 ?, ]0 G: j# r
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"7 _5 P6 I2 e& r |( `7 Z5 y, B# r3 H9 G
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?6 W+ c1 t- N+ a* X! ^- [8 _0 m7 G
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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# S+ b7 _' b7 @# F4 `7 VI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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0 c1 H& M9 ^, A+ a/ X6 BI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!9 m! r( [5 j& d3 v) s3 _5 g
7 g/ L* p: ~" x5 b( x6 ?; `I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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3 h& O/ a x5 c; u* j6 OSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* _' ^- T7 x6 R- E$ |
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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4 l g& |, c3 k5 kThank you very much!
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, o8 l6 ?( M% C9 u1 T) eImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:3 d8 C2 F, ?! J' a7 o. d
) y; g) y4 [2 ?8 i& c1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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# H8 R+ |9 R# I& }" X2 |5 a2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.% u) g3 x6 k5 D* p0 v9 q
( z* g C& a# m"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".7 J/ T% S2 N. h$ {$ ?8 J
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.* A- k/ ?+ Y' |2 p' B8 Y* b
: a& V, N! E p% Q* @# j R. ^. dThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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