 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
7 k) z E/ w; {5 [3 q& V$ O! B% b# [; H+ j I5 j9 k! C9 s9 m
I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.; J: q- r# ~0 ^ S
^& X$ H# C. R+ `2 o* mI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.1 o; d" F) N/ J `& m7 i7 F
" G6 {' Q4 p" U% TI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:- L: X( ?8 I' I
( t6 i* Q9 P" G9 `"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
" |# s/ n& j( E) z
- m+ Q# F( y# F2 s* T+ MI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?' c$ s) S' k4 U+ `
2 z' m3 `; o) r0 Q
And the second one was:
I, m; v" k- `9 y0 ?/ W
5 T+ e8 C! |. v7 E"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
* _1 s" p, H g2 T2 N! z4 O4 v5 f) O! R6 @. E5 h$ F4 l
I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?% h4 d' U* B, {& S0 A1 Q
& e4 W* P! e+ u' z3 Q8 s R6 P
"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
; i- D1 v% m* ?4 F _$ F8 E
" U' H1 C* A5 R! VI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
; s; C% W6 }2 e8 K7 d% U. Y
5 \4 G; N* H7 S) A( @4 E1 f2 ]I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
' e' B: }+ ]9 a* L/ p0 C. |5 W. [1 r, U9 Z) V1 S9 I' G
I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."! X0 k1 l% |( H* I
9 R8 S b- _- W0 J
So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"% i% j* V1 t1 T8 \
2 S1 j/ c) |: s+ `
Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”( O8 M/ r- e+ @# O0 m: V
+ ^9 N9 M5 V+ o1 R
This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
, U: b) H! c, L, }, f, y2 U% t
% ~ ]9 n% c9 e6 L$ NThank you very much!
. S( ]7 o9 e+ t+ W7 {$ N6 e8 p/ M! E+ Q1 h# g O4 }2 P
==========================) W; ]# r. c) ~# w1 F% L& c: X- T
0 z( Q; x: K6 C& S6 J( e
Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:. _6 o- [! ^' E( D; I8 E9 ^
5 t8 ?2 y5 q$ x, [2 p3 Y, q, R/ A: h
1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.% F9 {& F9 [! Z1 H; w
1 P3 s( e0 \, T3 T* w% t2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
9 V# s) S/ ]. P R x- R! h
y' O6 w9 _0 C$ i1 i: v6 A! L"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.- q' Y+ a+ }0 g/ x9 |. L/ F J
* {, L' z/ \& m, y* Y" cJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
8 T; a, S/ f0 x5 s i: H x. T+ X' W% N5 h: S
Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US. j6 r+ ^3 i: R( V7 W
6 s- K; W& p9 P
The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
