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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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6 c6 J: R9 X$ ~4 tI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.' n1 J8 B) P- t6 m# F
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.0 d( U3 {$ @" L( K4 q* ~3 X( |! f
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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7 S! X$ d  U" F# [# x+ \5 D( ^"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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. O4 l" E# l5 vI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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1 H: j* ^) T3 H# \: T+ w. c"What's the 2nd Amendment?"  G$ e% {- F% V8 p$ c4 b
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?4 ~+ F9 J' n, W  g1 k( ?1 G
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!9 T6 P& r2 s  I

; O/ _( _+ k) g: G5 hI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."3 E) Q& w( O8 K# J6 B  c2 j
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"1 o6 N8 Z8 W+ \5 \3 d
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.2 u4 q# d) }! ]' ~* e8 v
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Thank you very much!
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+ f% n- M. {2 K4 P" [/ \7 lImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill., R8 z0 ], C/ X4 P' `# B
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.5 k, ~" ?  w$ L2 S; S, k1 R

( A& |) b8 }( W' e: Y) o8 p"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.6 \. y! H+ n6 O2 S/ ^6 C

# H7 W. n0 j7 B/ R9 q: nJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".  Y  I" g) M* q4 c( H0 m0 B

0 n+ Q5 j# y! ^$ a1 `$ pRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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4 z& k) \$ L' EThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
5 v( \3 f& {9 n' d; qa young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
% W3 J5 ~- z7 v: W怎么理解?  u1 ^7 u: X/ u: h
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。, V4 B' w' Q* e
怎么理解?
, R9 D' R# @3 N  |5 D& E5 {, j6 v50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
% o. b2 t8 a5 M7 D. \! Y5 Dcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳   i4 ?3 m) V/ J, N$ g4 J% j( f! ^
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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