 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe./ R( [8 i4 {- }
' O8 f4 z6 x# q% Y( \1 `5 aI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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0 l. m5 U* M3 v wI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:, d1 S' E; s t; a# j/ D3 P% Q1 {
+ i" D& x2 X) K+ T+ f7 s2 t9 w"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:! R% r) ~/ a6 Q
7 }5 @6 [' q/ M; ?9 q* H"What's the 2nd Amendment?"0 Y v9 F( O( h& t9 b+ x+ \
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?( R* x) ~( `# E" U
# m) |) T: W2 K7 r"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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; [* {6 v/ S% D" K! [0 {I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?5 \% M0 ?: l6 N" W7 P! u+ v
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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/ Q/ { r! k8 R$ YI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."& X. T4 g0 d$ X. V
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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( ]4 [' i r6 x% c' E& m. ~$ Y3 cNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”' N5 c5 r) H" o, Q3 ~& v; w1 N
7 Y- e4 r1 ~* }' \' v4 j( CThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.5 D2 u! m/ }! j2 v/ u
. w' q& n/ ~! c- o+ \+ lThank you very much!& X, J2 r9 L0 h T: T; _
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3 A$ b* b3 J$ Y6 ^4 w5 P2 bImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill. G2 r4 V3 j. z- l
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.8 ?# u# x9 N+ G
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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- L& M w- {- C4 C$ K4 qRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
