 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.! P* U E: U- n3 P/ B
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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6 R+ i) X8 a) g4 W) SI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"1 m& L" N; w8 ~ l3 r
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?9 n1 m: T, x8 c0 U- j: }2 @& \
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And the second one was:2 G1 S2 H6 S1 h
9 v: T: ^; \5 Z' `) j6 C0 q) T"What's the 2nd Amendment?"$ f6 r! ]# H' v& O9 L& f
. @3 x$ q8 y+ A# t( N% A0 SI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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7 j! E x7 F6 y"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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' w4 B, ] @2 G2 nI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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$ `& u. H* ]- I" A" YI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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" e0 d/ p* D' Q: C e# bI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."3 K6 q. d! K' n1 a
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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; Y0 Y" Q0 r- H: I6 t+ RNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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0 m4 W, x% B, H+ ?- vThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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: |0 a* m2 W$ Q* |7 tThank you very much!
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" Z9 j: S t# J7 UImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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; ]5 M: t$ V+ R2 y Z$ i1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.1 J* y1 z- o0 \
1 O+ g1 O6 g# p2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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, c E: i1 [# h; g5 ]0 w"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion." H- G2 Z; g3 i( q
" R& o! T. k# J: M# RJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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8 _7 p( u1 d9 @2 k, }0 L5 I: Y' OThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
