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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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1 x" U0 l" i- WI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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8 c0 k) w! j7 p3 ~! A& tI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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; a1 n" P+ n  d$ c7 u7 sI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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& N9 }/ y/ Y6 ^! [# h7 t"What's the 2nd Amendment?"9 e' q& ?9 L- ^7 p

& ^* L0 K1 ^% Z8 [3 X) LI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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8 Q5 w4 x, S1 K- k8 y8 c8 R, W"What is Roe vs. Wade?"! L4 Q) x4 V) i

9 d7 L3 I. m% cI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?% w5 h/ _1 T( u. |* Z; C- H

, T) ^" \8 ?" t: p, xI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!, o5 o* Y/ T. `4 {8 Q9 U; H5 ?5 i
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."9 W9 J4 P/ W( t2 C6 s
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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8 q1 [8 ]# e( Z$ F* w" o2 ^This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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0 C  p) G+ {9 h2 L. }! NThank you very much!
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==========================
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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7 g$ A' @& G8 k  p1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.& h/ S1 Y& n& m  D7 n( G

  f$ N1 u- b5 o9 \9 Q/ d$ y2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.! w/ D5 j: o% b* b5 g# t

- u: @) ~% ^! R' |"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.& W  w' P( }# L! ^; F2 U# n
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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5 ?; t9 X4 l$ v7 g3 G9 RRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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' r( ^9 L" n( a5 W; h" WThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
5 x+ o$ g5 A0 D! |$ Ea young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。' p; |, {7 I$ W- I8 U0 ?
怎么理解?# Q2 V) v, m  B5 f4 Y
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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# p" S, ~" S: C' Q" m不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
0 E* S/ S' _# Q' x, k怎么理解?8 ]7 Q% d3 I, k
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?" A8 Y( [. j! ~. q! Y7 m
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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" I* P9 y3 W1 \% O3 v我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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