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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house3 x7 |0 Q/ O4 h* M% ?, c$ e
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.7 ~, O7 }; G' S2 g$ |
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,2 A% Q( e/ b4 C7 A$ V, v2 I
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.4 l% G0 }0 \2 \ f6 w0 U
He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.. g/ y% Z9 ^( \" r
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
9 T9 |. f6 _3 t7 y- mHe’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
' y# W: n* b& k& m& F- G9 kWith Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story." [; I% C+ G6 C+ {. V8 e
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
" [5 T# F2 z4 v5 U/ \1 I! x7 s8 vTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.; w8 B F2 f4 X) X; x
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
1 e" \: @( n0 `, t- E; k( S+ h5 ~ sWhen not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.! ~/ S5 Y8 t# L: S( ?; v
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
, Y8 I/ T, z* S8 x) QTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .. B& i. G4 w& J$ j9 X4 O3 E# k' L
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
0 @4 l' h) W* N; b, d3 ?"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."" ^2 ?3 H+ C& Q" y6 z4 ]3 `# X" V
She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,- w' k$ P- ]' K; h
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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