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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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& ^! ]0 V1 V$ \" _9 M, y0 f7 n1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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0 J9 ?! r# S( A( Q4 k' i m) i2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush% a: O- F6 z0 c# w' m
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday3 X) `$ n6 ~9 U4 ?' v0 {5 H
morning.) @! w, Z6 W0 @1 L+ V8 m) H& [
% u# ] j+ E8 u6 `% O5 s2 Y" z3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
! u% s0 X- x: O' s) Z7 m5 ?5 c7 _- }you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
; y5 C$ f: R) ]- F4 r4 Nlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.; {' @& ]9 g6 r1 q! _0 B* H
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
4 r/ m' L8 s9 |own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest% {9 ^# m, } f! E6 r4 F
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires$ z9 i7 i6 ^9 M
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell- h* c7 G" k! }3 v$ c9 u" [
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.- L/ }4 x8 z3 A+ {, m
9 ?& V B3 D, ~5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,3 x9 {; o9 z& R! E; c8 l
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can! Z" o2 N! o; f& G! e% r
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that y& b3 t# } t. F9 Q+ F
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
5 p& S0 W, {4 P$ Bthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot. Y" ?" G- P7 j* c8 M+ d# u
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
. m* I' H: t0 U; Mvehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour# P) ]" P) S+ E' u- G' c* u
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next: h3 f% J9 H, k0 n$ |0 t5 _9 m" _) f
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and5 d: G: E- H; B
more construction starts everyday.
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6 e1 w7 n8 E5 p* c2 C* e6 e9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,2 T: D7 ^& M3 O; K3 g5 y6 l
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,6 C1 |" o/ q$ q7 d! V9 w9 M3 E
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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, h. r/ X2 _* P, Y6 N10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
- Y& Z. c% I# H8 |! T+ Broad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
! h% g* J# Q) _% l& mRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and' _& ^- q3 i4 k3 x n1 ^' d
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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! ?. Q) M- y k- Q. R' L! m* Z11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
+ v5 d6 y4 h1 j4 ashoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally& |- S/ W& H! ?: b
Activated.'
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1 e9 j P8 E( P/ _: r4 y2 f( `1 z: `12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
3 U" B9 s; O8 b& myou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
6 f& @+ Q/ }- F5 P% \accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
/ G" r7 p4 {$ Hlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
$ |6 o* d' ]% o8 ?$ Gblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
