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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!" w7 D* i# i$ j
请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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! m% `3 d. B: v2 a/ |1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
" f  u9 N# K; _! C% T" U1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫: n0 J) ~: R/ c; Z/ c! }8 d

: G( E  j; y' k( h- j( h1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
4 K: w5 e/ D  ^1 w6 r" _- jdown.
4 _4 }8 R2 s' z- z0 ~We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
7 s6 l& ^. W' {  i1 N! u# Yyou0 [2 s3 L4 P% P) D0 {. s) l
leaving it down.3 K7 e) K* s' A( |9 D6 ~! Q2 F
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?! x0 w9 U# I. w/ j  u9 }
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
. d2 m4 A# n* n2 s/ pLet it be.
; K8 ?  T* Y" B% x1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
- Z- @$ H% ^3 v  dthat way.
7 l. e. p4 T! R( Z+ J  c2 R5 W6 A1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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$ a/ U9 W) _% N% j1. Crying is blackmail.
; D! g- m5 u" o& g% K5 y1,哭泣是敲诈( B' e; D2 J. e4 F$ F

5 U! W' C; F  S7 |5 R; A1. Ask for what you want./ H6 W$ Q" X- ?2 W) p. r
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
5 b6 t5 E/ G" h4 i/ G! V) aStrong hints do not work!) T! h9 h- e# c5 G, z3 i& v
Obvious hints do not work!8 k- J! e9 \8 ~) ^3 s7 Y8 F
Just say it!
7 ~8 c$ j3 \, M3 e, U. J+ ~2 o1,你想要什么就说
7 S: G2 Z5 u* e6 S1 R我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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0 U: D$ ~" V6 j) T: z% ^; d$ ]1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every % ~! L  H/ `! [' B8 M, {7 }! N
question.* }/ i0 ]" H) o( e$ K0 c
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)5 f5 K& C0 p8 e3 E) ^; u5 ?
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's8 H5 \" h7 t7 w- h" G
what we do.& j0 K5 G2 D; Y
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
' q1 q  S0 M" y$ V3 d2 x& l1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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+ z9 a4 N) G  \# V& `3 U1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.* a4 u8 B9 U2 B
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去, {, m9 V1 I% W9 f

0 g" e# w; p4 q2 T) U# o- ~. E1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
3 k. C& j6 r. M& Z8 j. wIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
" {- E% ?9 W# r( }" P: I我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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+ T3 H' B7 s1 E5 W# A% ?9 |/ k* _7 J4 `1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us+ M/ u0 s; |; {- L
to act like soap opera guys.
: t) h' w! A: ]. y3 C: m1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们$ s4 a! y& O/ V' Z. G
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.0 T+ E  s# Z& c, J$ Y. l' w
1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们6 i' t1 B5 U4 ^
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways4 Z2 n6 H$ ~: ?- K! H, ^+ _
makes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.
8 y+ j4 C7 D5 @1 l7 [/ e+ t( L1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。! T8 g, N$ ~/ V5 E- V" \: X
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)
7 ^6 N4 G# b' K2 |& b% d/ ~3 O& h- G1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it- E, f; Z! u3 j* F$ ?
done. Not both.: J' y* W8 ]: E5 j8 A. O
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.8 w) W8 \) c. k. K' r$ Y# n2 A
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
$ L9 S. ]; W' H* a( acommercials.' X* @* D5 `  `9 G+ e9 S
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.$ y5 G8 T% t" \

' Q: J! b2 L1 z. l6 [1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
! Z2 X8 T. b- _7 APeach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
* S. t% b. I, V, h2 h( jWe have no idea what mauve is.' ~1 P( w2 l; k, Z# c$ v: W
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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: q2 g) H4 J7 G1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like6 L6 B( v+ o2 Z" o0 }
nothing's wrong.% i1 B) n" V5 j& J  O$ Z" r' q
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.; j. B9 |8 f) e# B6 k
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
  `9 I3 B& J. h) v8 @) ~  N9 T( |you don't want to hear.
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5 _" n7 E# I7 z8 \$ C* M1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
* V1 W3 q' m- k0 Cfine...Really.# n2 Y& b6 n1 q+ m7 x0 c8 m+ s

/ ~7 S: y- m. I3 i" A( c1 o1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to3 G- X% S7 m. t9 r5 m5 L/ s  n% w" ]
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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0 u  C' C  S4 e9 }5 m1. You have enough clothes.
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5 ]5 C7 e2 O5 D0 V; U2 t0 S1. You have too many shoes.! P" T% M2 F4 m
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!' ]3 m. U: i2 ^& ?/ @8 T
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1. Thank you for reading this./ ^+ I" D" K2 Q2 u4 l% h

: H2 J5 h! z8 j% HYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;6 a; B- N' o0 W8 E; o8 w0 L
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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$ Z! Z8 P4 ^3 T# G: K0 zPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
; I  F' Z/ u8 o. `8 L1 e- l7 BPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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6 O2 x( P* q' r. S. h1 [1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we., ]% t5 t; O% A" d
我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
/ g% U6 D  s. \所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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, @, f. `, C# O% z) A1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
; P2 u- I  }- a& Z如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。* q5 X1 O1 n. k+ t. g
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% u3 e/ g$ v8 k* h5 c1 S' y1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.3 O. l; a3 \9 j
如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。/ I- h0 G! ^! e' E
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- d" E# z5 @1 s9 p) R; X1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.+ Z/ l3 C0 D. r+ k' Q7 e
如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:
0 z7 k. X7 k9 kALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
( ^! Q) U3 p# L( T+ E+ ?所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置3 f- ^# W6 w# L: f) S( [& z- c
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.; _9 C+ k/ S. J1 u  |
如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.0 _+ i4 i  t8 M
不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。5 x  z! `) R) Y9 u" l0 w' V, [

: m2 l5 z; |/ w) B1. You have enough clothes.2 ~" x* P7 Y" J8 _
你的衣服足够多了
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  C7 k; Y8 }  m7 r) P+ i- n/ W1. You have too many shoes.0 |4 }  \- X  R! P5 z' S5 E- r
你的鞋子也太多了吧
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!% I0 L, |3 }9 }  C
我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?) y% |% P- v3 m" i) Y. B, [
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1. Thank you for reading this.
- h4 R, U8 E4 O: z% |( g  I7 x2 [多谢你能看完这个1 x, G4 F4 ^4 Y1 e  Y6 n

  v# s$ }( Y' a, R/ f. H1 IYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
" o& A* H. l& V2 l/ K我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置) P9 Z# u; I" J" H( q, @

0 P7 B4 u4 i9 I, E还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!

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应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿
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玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:# i; `) E8 A. p% A) d# T- P* {4 ]8 ~
1. You have enough clothes.
  R% {) \& m! D9 k你的衣服足够多了4 \! V3 X! {% k3 V% R% [

, h0 S$ Z5 l+ P: \0 g  H' U/ v1. You have too many shoes.
) c1 ?  I& q8 j  P$ R- P4 c你的鞋子也太多了吧

' M5 }" [+ r3 `" H( i这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
大型搬家
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?5 |  k( {  x2 Q1 I. Q

$ H  p, ]# e$ b1 e# Y6 a----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.
- P) R* q; h/ @Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
, Y9 A( R0 w/ M3 ~Strong hints do not work!: z; D) S1 d8 `
Obvious hints do not work!
/ C' ]) f0 c; u4 {Just say it!7 v! g0 ?' {) k4 P' w- J$ `" L
1,你想要什么就说
& \- C/ w- F2 {/ `5 ]我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
大型搬家
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:
4 V/ n7 b7 E" U, `6 d- ^& @( u6 j1. Ask for what you want.
; Q; u! l% k, k+ E- C+ Q$ QLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
- e% u$ y" M8 z( r" q; \Strong hints do not work!
4 z, [3 n% `5 }2 A3 |Obvious hints do not work!
# o5 o6 A+ B  M2 uJust say it!
" D7 b. Y6 S1 p$ \2 l1,你想要什么就说! T0 {1 @# f; e/ K1 `3 U, ]
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...

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瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
$ T$ S, {5 ^. L( e被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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  F: B. E- c: s咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿8 V+ c: \" n# @8 k/ h4 A8 d( M

2 u# m/ @2 G# a9 ]http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:+ }4 c! w8 u( F" M9 a) w/ Z2 }

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1 r7 t& u6 i9 w5 c8 N; Z咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿! t1 I; {! p$ O( o: ]

& L0 j7 F2 ]. chttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
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( ~: l) T! K5 ~9 F' |' [- r7 V' Z. V这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。, Y1 t7 I; ]5 o# ?' w

. ]9 r2 Z) \: M+ W: K& u还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:; {4 z8 n' e1 Y7 M

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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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还想问问你的体会呢!
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体会?; E+ H  o# ^( x2 S9 g* G$ g6 F

0 k; h. z' N- s$ Q9 d回答到那个帖子下面了
大型搬家
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