 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
|
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
k0 {! K' b& t% g3 y+ J _+ I3 v( {9 X请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
; ~2 B( {' ^3 o1 H T9 ]0 U3 Y2 S" A. d j, X3 O# V2 B
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers." D+ N0 v: }6 R& V- G& d5 e
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫& t5 v( q# I/ n0 i3 z9 ?$ R" n
) i% P, \6 R; }) N
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
) |. P; o; L' l5 p0 ~. sdown.
4 P2 R+ L' u, |0 z' X |# [We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about ! x& z7 X$ |! h5 Z8 v0 c( T Q; [3 N
you
) C4 W" X& g, Y- Zleaving it down.
0 o" C3 F. T! a$ Z1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
/ S/ A+ q0 R1 ~- W$ ]
+ r& I9 X+ [6 P) S1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.0 Z. z* X4 e# t, G+ M( B7 X
Let it be.
1 V" n! [- T1 k2 |1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
1 y; e6 t! J( N5 h' b1 J n) Q( C$ A+ K0 F6 o M3 O
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
9 T& Y1 _& B) Xthat way.% D2 w/ P7 i( {) L2 [% v3 p
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
1 B3 V$ G3 o: a1 m: K1 W4 ^4 X/ l ], |* Q) z/ F: ^
1. Crying is blackmail.! M4 L- i, [% N% S# L) I0 Z' n, |8 X
1，哭泣是敲诈) \' a" a; N6 J# a* Z% g* {/ t
: d' K1 u7 ^2 z" m$ j+ o
1. Ask for what you want.
- ~/ l. z4 I* k2 S. p* q1 XLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!5 H8 y- y, L, w: H4 @$ P
Strong hints do not work!: Z% C7 v5 ?6 {0 J) u; G0 ], H
Obvious hints do not work!0 s5 t9 i' T+ I8 V4 G% E
Just say it!
! A/ I) f- L, v' u& t( u4 b1，你想要什么就说
" O5 `# M) k H9 t9 S: f) D我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！# U( D( B+ f$ D7 ~* a
+ C# g( }* S* B" w1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
5 Z2 Y- i1 s( D" |question.2 |0 w8 q7 i$ F# y( w: R# E" R
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）* N7 J/ e, U7 R# @" Y, B# E }
( t, u! I) O6 b/ Q
1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's5 F' v# H$ f9 C( p1 J: a
what we do.- U7 c2 z2 n; \- j
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.* f/ G. ^7 p3 f {, p
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
) H- G$ K: |; o+ S; L6 _0 y k$ F" P. d. r9 e
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.# n" w9 k$ \# E2 z8 u
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
- H1 o5 I8 t7 m9 f7 k9 q2 r% Z" f5 S# [8 V
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.: w: I3 t! J) X% v, O
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.6 B! V$ s9 p* `3 K; p4 O$ t7 n, R
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了1 @2 m# n/ @ S
. l5 f8 ?' W& _4 A4 w, V( C9 H1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
8 S5 {* u7 R, k. i. u Sto act like soap opera guys.8 T( Q- g& f* |4 Z* d
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
7 ]5 Y. f9 q4 }. V t0 g9 ?4 y; z* d' D0 o4 d B5 v
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us., F( U: _* ]9 h4 M# U2 E" U
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
" w- V, X: D6 S: W- v2 w2 C* H0 ]6 B9 @4 e$ s* I. @1 n' `$ ]
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways2 j- o. g- k. p _: A
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.! x& j; ^8 C( g8 v$ Q% R m
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
7 Z6 {" O0 }% B, W
1 j6 W$ b: p* g' `1 f: k7 d（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢） f. h5 u _0 J# @
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it9 Y& X" z! a p9 F
done. Not both. Z* G9 }9 E; W. N
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
: m1 P7 u0 C/ t" P8 _, N4 J! o8 P9 l3 k
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
; y5 n4 e( t3 a; Ucommercials.8 I% ]5 {3 B C4 v) ^
1 `% v- y4 e- W. s9 _$ K9 W1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.& |8 w) i- A& D5 t, d9 G' ^
+ [0 k% y% W9 v0 v4 p, c* k/ u7 _1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.& j: @0 q: Y/ ]8 H) u7 E+ p s
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
+ v" W! ^9 {. \! K1 X! \; ~We have no idea what mauve is., V9 T, W5 ]3 ~; w
2 l% j7 y+ R- e- s2 U% B1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.: {1 E, Z5 G/ K8 p8 W5 K) ^4 w
) v- n+ m3 D. a @( f$ q1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like6 Q. x# l) @7 B3 f! }# L Q2 ~
nothing's wrong.
7 o* }1 d' l0 U/ BWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
5 ~, c( o! w9 D: E/ e6 v$ ^9 e$ r- n, `* a! u7 ] }' Y Q
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer3 P, E; t2 k5 Q `
you don't want to hear.
$ {* S" V* [7 l, v0 ~
& U% m/ ~+ V8 N- X9 f& d6 k! Z1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is! v6 V- Z. z/ u) z* y
fine...Really.
, r! p8 J. ?" A) v6 j* H9 F9 a6 @2 U7 p5 {
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
4 W$ p( T, l2 h" b# U; |1 gdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
5 d; D* ]1 p' H- S; k' y$ `3 u4 S8 Q X. I0 x# r
1. You have enough clothes.( s4 j/ s# w8 D! D4 n$ ]1 r
$ S. x1 W' ~6 s$ Z; R1. You have too many shoes.
7 {6 I& I: V7 p1 k, ] q; B# y1 Z' T, g% \
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
% i; _: _1 F( O/ |6 s, x6 [4 _7 k2 C) U' t# z2 P4 O8 @
1. Thank you for reading this.5 c! s* }+ T8 C) j
f3 x' k. S! m4 Z" B
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
1 K3 ?1 z1 e$ N- u% u6 |But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. ^8 I4 |4 d! I+ ~7 h7 D Y
5 p: s$ @5 v) qPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
, n6 `8 l9 |$ n' S( _& RPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
