 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!2 ~5 b/ a i4 m/ T
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写+ F c9 O! b8 J) w
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.; V1 ^, _4 v5 d* ?6 F/ n
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫) U" P8 ^5 S2 J, u* v$ r
7 H' b0 g* M3 s6 j* e) w* ]* E% ^/ E1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it' B9 {, L9 _/ ~5 K7 p
down.' @ s+ s& I2 l! A" G1 F, O6 \5 B
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
0 }9 ?5 {8 J6 n8 U7 a4 @/ d* qyou
0 t0 E$ _9 m0 l3 E: O& J6 b( ~4 X4 aleaving it down." ^5 x1 C# O3 x, N0 q/ a$ S6 ?2 n
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？7 ^1 d( q+ k; C, m) d7 y
' U* F G0 o1 F, l. o1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
; c, `0 j |; T+ E' ULet it be.
3 ?0 O1 F: w8 D# d1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去+ {/ b- e9 M* s4 v7 E; ^( c
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
o1 ]3 R/ l5 l+ H* B; @3 N% B6 ~that way.
* D. ^2 T" A' C- |& h! Q& e1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！; M1 F& U& T6 j x9 i9 q9 ^
$ V' ^/ f4 D! B# T3 J' u, R1. Crying is blackmail.
+ P7 [. D7 d" e1，哭泣是敲诈( u" w' u4 z3 u0 T
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1. Ask for what you want.
+ _" O& z. n2 KLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!9 U. T2 x. B2 w2 s, R# W# {
Strong hints do not work!' w& R! d( T" y5 U- Z1 F* K
Obvious hints do not work!; C& w$ h h4 X x) v2 j
Just say it!
3 r G; _, d+ {- E" f C" x1，你想要什么就说4 |% B. o4 C0 F( f/ \$ u/ {
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！* f. J5 E; `) p$ U" e
% i% K5 n% ?3 h1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
# h6 a% Z0 ~. V- g- X+ o& equestion.3 E2 @' Z8 X1 C9 `0 h: N
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）/ o- H3 ` a( p4 T" ]% C4 q* p
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
) \6 y+ s _9 }what we do.8 W8 C W. z D% s# c
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.5 _4 F5 `8 S2 d) o Y, d- v
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。/ S4 Q1 N) T& w. d7 d- |" p
: h- |7 k% Y6 U0 t+ D3 w2 C1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
" U4 u( O! J. p' P+ i1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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; y/ \8 E1 I8 g) ^% w1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.4 N0 t( F" _. A6 Y. z2 D. v2 O; z
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
' {1 \+ b% Y. c$ _5 r* c4 N我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了 {1 v0 o4 ^) U" _/ T' `# Q
0 l+ x/ ^2 I! A) b7 x1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
0 j' R' B6 q( w1 o) wto act like soap opera guys.' a; z& J- m+ R
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们/ U) O5 j6 m+ A
4 E9 w- M! D1 u1 H. x* \; c; |1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1 R* y5 {! X* b" S p( i* C1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们* F8 f$ Q5 A) g' i! N8 F
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
! ~' `' u* t, L3 Q- ]2 Dmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
Q. m: f9 ]% y5 O* l6 M1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。" x0 t& l- W5 W) o6 T l2 L. R
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）) r) U) s- H w& Z: Z
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it) T; ^) \! b; m P6 m& w6 V% e4 W
done. Not both.; Q% I2 h+ D. V* R, S% I% r- G
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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% C2 Q7 s, b- p7 b8 r1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
( S; S) O9 R) ]1 n8 f/ @commercials.
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( Y' i3 y! j+ F- Q1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.. L) z e" h1 { d7 D( q
- z2 r$ E& k7 [! D7 q0 M0 H' M1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
5 |1 |6 r5 Y# L& w$ ZPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.7 o' D% S6 {1 T( G2 E( l1 G8 J: Q
We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.9 B* P9 D% A$ G x1 P
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like/ B2 S) C' [1 N5 Z9 b
nothing's wrong.+ A0 k( v0 y) f# F7 _
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer/ ?4 _3 B8 s4 z I
you don't want to hear.0 U$ S( }9 N8 u9 B9 ?
) Q7 @* k4 c0 w t1 T1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is( V9 v& N! m( r% j3 b
fine...Really.: W5 d* O3 v# U& T" x
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to& _7 I- N& l% _6 o! D) i
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.3 Y9 e" j b+ z. z0 t% Z+ G" S
; u6 E6 U$ X: [1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.
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6 C7 \& k3 n8 L/ M* e, ]: J7 y1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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2 C4 t$ I& B2 {; u* s: F1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;- M1 G2 f3 M6 b- g
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.* R8 ]5 b- U& k7 T ^0 s
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
