 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!" w7 D* i# i$ j
请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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! m% `3 d. B: v2 a/ |1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
" f u9 N# K; _! C% T" U1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫: n0 J) ~: R/ c; Z/ c! }8 d
: G( E j; y' k( h- j( h1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
4 K: w5 e/ D ^1 w6 r" _- jdown.
4 _4 }8 R2 s' z- z0 ~We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.3 K7 e) K* s' A( |9 D6 ~! Q2 F
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?! x0 w9 U# I. w/ j u9 }
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
. d2 m4 A# n* n2 s/ pLet it be.
; K8 ? T* Y" B% x1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
- Z- @$ H% ^3 v dthat way.
7 l. e. p4 T! R( Z+ J c2 R5 W6 A1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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$ a/ U9 W) _% N% j1. Crying is blackmail.
; D! g- m5 u" o& g% K5 y1,哭泣是敲诈( B' e; D2 J. e4 F$ F
5 U! W' C; F S7 |5 R; A1. Ask for what you want./ H6 W$ Q" X- ?2 W) p. r
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
5 b6 t5 E/ G" h4 i/ G! V) aStrong hints do not work!) T! h9 h- e# c5 G, z3 i& v
Obvious hints do not work!8 k- J! e9 \8 ~) ^3 s7 Y8 F
Just say it!
7 ~8 c$ j3 \, M3 e, U. J+ ~2 o1,你想要什么就说
7 S: G2 Z5 u* e6 S1 R我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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0 U: D$ ~" V6 j) T: z% ^; d$ ]1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every % ~! L H/ `! [' B8 M, {7 }! N
question.* }/ i0 ]" H) o( e$ K0 c
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)5 f5 K& C0 p8 e3 E) ^; u5 ?
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's8 H5 \" h7 t7 w- h" G
what we do.& j0 K5 G2 D; Y
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
' q1 q S0 M" y$ V3 d2 x& l1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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+ z9 a4 N) G \# V& `3 U1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.* a4 u8 B9 U2 B
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去, {, m9 V1 I% W9 f
0 g" e# w; p4 q2 T) U# o- ~. E1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
3 k. C& j6 r. M& Z8 j. wIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
" {- E% ?9 W# r( }" P: I我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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+ T3 H' B7 s1 E5 W# A% ?9 |/ k* _7 J4 `1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us+ M/ u0 s; |; {- L
to act like soap opera guys.
: t) h' w! A: ]. y3 C: m1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们$ s4 a! y& O/ V' Z. G
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.0 T+ E s# Z& c, J$ Y. l' w
1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们6 i' t1 B5 U4 ^
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways4 Z2 n6 H$ ~: ?- K! H, ^+ _
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
8 y+ j4 C7 D5 @1 l7 [/ e+ t( L1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。! T8 g, N$ ~/ V5 E- V" \: X
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)
7 ^6 N4 G# b' K2 |& b% d/ ~3 O& h- G1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it- E, f; Z! u3 j* F$ ?
done. Not both.: J' y* W8 ]: E5 j8 A. O
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.8 w) W8 \) c. k. K' r$ Y# n2 A
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.$ y5 G8 T% t" \
' Q: J! b2 L1 z. l6 [1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
! Z2 X8 T. b- _7 APeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
* S. t% b. I, V, h2 h( jWe have no idea what mauve is.' ~1 P( w2 l; k, Z# c$ v: W
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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: q2 g) H4 J7 G1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like6 L6 B( v+ o2 Z" o0 }
nothing's wrong.% i1 B) n" V5 j& J O$ Z" r' q
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.; j. B9 |8 f) e# B6 k
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
`9 I3 B& J. h) v8 @) ~ N9 T( |you don't want to hear.
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5 _" n7 E# I7 z8 \$ C* M1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
* V1 W3 q' m- k0 Cfine...Really.# n2 Y& b6 n1 q+ m7 x0 c8 m+ s
/ ~7 S: y- m. I3 i" A( c1 o1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to3 G- X% S7 m. t9 r5 m5 L/ s n% w" ]
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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0 u C' C S4 e9 }5 m1. You have enough clothes.
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5 ]5 C7 e2 O5 D0 V; U2 t0 S1. You have too many shoes.! P" T% M2 F4 m
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!' ]3 m. U: i2 ^& ?/ @8 T
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1. Thank you for reading this./ ^+ I" D" K2 Q2 u4 l% h
: H2 J5 h! z8 j% HYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;6 a; B- N' o0 W8 E; o8 w0 L
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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$ Z! Z8 P4 ^3 T# G: K0 zPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
; I F' Z/ u8 o. `8 L1 e- l7 BPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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