 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
) l. A& g7 s6 g% o8 h$ y6 G请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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- i$ G& `& d2 }$ `1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.# a+ |: S" l0 L5 ~* k
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫- o; N5 L, ?; }- f$ m
|$ Q5 u+ |% V8 }1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
& E" `6 ?) O1 \5 w& J8 p. \( }down.
7 `+ e. S+ r, f& iWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 4 t% y2 h, o9 {( y
you4 [/ v% {0 J$ z0 Q. @, K' [9 u
leaving it down.& B5 Y: i# {$ d' r
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.: X; D/ O5 G1 N5 P# M0 D% z
Let it be.9 I4 J1 n/ S$ n9 t
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it4 n. a# E, @, i$ o* _4 L% E
that way.
, d" n! B: Y1 e" w* r7 C1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.; C# h/ `0 n1 R- d3 |. _
1，哭泣是敲诈6 r( K$ \" D# H, w0 s" C' c
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1. Ask for what you want.
. s4 h: d; ^1 x5 {: U- m: v% c7 `Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
6 V' s2 r( K7 Y4 X* fStrong hints do not work!; y' L( I1 ]: a- B' k% }$ B. D
Obvious hints do not work!" i0 M" g# K4 ` C2 n
Just say it!* l( P. T0 P3 S) C% z: W
1，你想要什么就说
) g% h8 e) H- ^0 S9 V我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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i0 U2 Y0 H' n3 v9 \1 y: V1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
1 E' I. ^! r& R6 u: ~& ]question.: |& X: I5 e* q4 q
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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5 O! H: z& p2 V& \( `1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's: M( K; Y7 b8 W5 x8 Z3 y; I [
what we do.
P- Z/ w6 A8 j0 j9 USympathy is what your girlfriends are for.1 _6 m2 D3 L0 O( v% O
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1 T% I0 T/ S8 F5 J1 \* c9 _1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.$ P! Q# ~3 v: n
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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X; Y9 @9 e% J" r1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.( [) @, O3 A/ f& g
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
% U9 X# j; y7 `我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了) R: c9 [: B/ T9 C/ Q; ]
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us5 k9 s. A9 W+ X( ]" C* Z
to act like soap opera guys.
( I9 P& k- B" j- |4 @# f1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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3 M3 {$ V1 g$ {5 J6 k* l1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.8 O; b4 I2 L2 D, v4 g8 P" L
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways/ X7 N+ K! y0 p4 s1 o1 z
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
3 O2 J$ k1 n( r1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
; t! \9 ?; R2 d- L1 e1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it7 }$ m% ?8 D2 S
done. Not both.1 Q: @- c9 ~+ n
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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7 A' |+ ?+ X# ?7 I: f5 G1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during" ]( ~8 t6 M6 j: P+ A, J
commercials.# J5 J1 i1 b' J$ k
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.# `& W4 c: p" q, x* `4 x. N
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
, f- _4 H2 C8 d5 L3 |We have no idea what mauve is.
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! q G1 T% [# a; \- q1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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" G9 H0 Z$ w( i6 m% o% f; b1 z6 F1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like" O* v, Z( F6 _7 @
nothing's wrong.
4 p, y& ]* k' x& s8 s9 {! EWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.8 T7 n9 T1 V2 L$ C0 x3 q+ G! ^
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
k! g; g* `5 Q) B. L) Nyou don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is& ^& q$ e A. j; C( p7 s6 d, h
fine...Really.6 ^ |2 J' u1 w" R
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
. h. o# @4 D: P6 Wdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.2 M5 u) e! [$ J! \6 C( A' F% A* y
5 L# ~+ v0 ~2 g+ F; f# `1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.8 c3 J3 X0 k& d3 F$ l$ s. B
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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$ _7 _5 L6 l2 N3 {7 N6 e. v$ h1. Thank you for reading this.
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; x) K! K8 H4 _; JYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;7 M) G- t3 I4 g* \/ e- ~
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.# x$ n+ \- f f0 D4 w
: ?9 f6 a$ z* z" CPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
& g2 [' l$ R( C7 j7 Z; d: }Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
