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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
0 O, G, \' ^: @: p2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. 6 B9 m% d* m6 i2 l' s/ `4 I
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
! o5 H( j' {7 x/ Q) q4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
0 p; r( z7 y& c- d2 d. {5 p7 o5. Weed
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# C' N3 A. A+ TTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA # M1 `9 U* t! f4 }# r
+ N" P: ^; C- i/ c# J" `1. Big rock between you and B.C.
; q' a( W/ W+ m6 }: t f2. Ottawa who?
6 c0 H. d; d8 G3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. $ G+ t/ ~4 X9 }* G+ S$ ^5 `
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. 5 ? e- Z# {6 m9 J; P' x, }3 U
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. , _$ ?$ a1 ~2 X( [/ u2 E
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. ; r6 S1 o: U6 X( [- H- z* r
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8 X1 N1 L: v# Z8 `+ MTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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1. You never run out of wheat.
- _( w1 [$ L: `4 I2. Your province is really easy to draw. X2 p3 N5 R. h% h+ M- @/ c
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
# Q6 D m# \- U8 r/ S3 R! A4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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# y7 I8 ?# P0 [3 V) U, V5 ?TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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, s/ G7 x: P/ J1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. + P6 p4 h$ ~! C: k |4 q j
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. 9 ^# r# y6 P5 v$ v. W2 f1 P; a
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
' t t1 w$ g6 M7 O0 z( [3 \4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 3 W* m. Z5 ^: a1 ^' d0 _: l6 l
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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2 \. l+ k0 A- |TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
: J7 j, d. ?3 i9 n7 ~' Y& w& f$ O2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. * {* m( S% r- g# d7 C9 i% M9 S
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. $ y( G* L, h( w2 P8 ]; Y
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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8 c0 b( l) m i( lTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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0 S& N" H! X8 b" V- n9 ?1 b1. Racism is socially acceptable
+ a6 c1 d% y0 u6 o! g* F w0 p2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. ; D D. C0 \6 E0 L: v1 u( R
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
" {' c1 _; p& ?. _3 t ^2 |4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
5 k. S( H) {* y6 B. ]. d7 cTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK - m [; `1 R+ c& L, @% ~9 w8 m
+ E, g* O7 W8 q }* i0 H! uTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 2 }( z3 y3 z$ x S) w7 p& _7 ^- [
0 h! T0 R( ^/ K1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. : V4 J1 z1 [' a2 A+ D$ F; s
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
. D# y& s" N( o3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
% P0 S( Y3 C. {7 H4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. 9 \: r* n8 N2 F0 j, ~3 o
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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& V% v4 o0 D' o$ \& u4 I1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
* | w: H( ]* N2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
1 X, T5 p$ B6 D' v+ O% g; E1 V8 U! F/ w. L3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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! J( G- ~/ \6 [: K/ M; t1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
7 n( k) Y' {4 `( [- E2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. ( Z- C7 y( x+ v6 ]1 m8 f, W5 n
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. 6 w# g/ {- k, o% \3 w
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." : U: A. z- ~' r- c% |. S [& j
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. : Z& ]$ l2 l2 s, A; A7 ^! \
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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, ]1 Z3 ?- k0 F1 ^0 mTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. ) [- g9 U3 a% J/ i% I, @" K' s
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
) _0 w) f1 h$ @, S6 B7 ], s: X& l+ P3. The workday is about two hours long. 4 h9 u; B2 m6 U# e5 S
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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