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Why did God make mothers?
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* A& j$ b2 ~2 ]0 @1 |- [1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.; P' O8 A( V+ H, \+ H
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3 A6 o$ E' L; u0 `- z/ p X3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 9 f5 { A4 R2 ?
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How did God make mothers?
! W# W8 _- q. J5 D4 R1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.* X! n4 J; y$ N) W9 k
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 3 G l0 l. T1 n% G* ?. q
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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( V+ n; ~2 K: }) v( EWhat ingredients are mothers made of ?
- K. D- I+ g2 k& Q' G1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. + r2 ^5 q b+ M
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 9 v9 J" ?! f$ N* o7 E+ y5 N
1. We're related.
3 y# g5 X S7 r5 G) }1 i: d2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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& y- ?+ @$ Q4 C) @# ?3 w. s. CWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
3 E+ d3 N& _/ T! V3 \( S0 j6 U1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
/ ]9 F1 y1 W6 j( t+ [2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
* i9 |9 h2 W* _2 p& S- u& Z3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? 2 X) V9 P- [2 q5 m$ `$ @* k
1. His last name.
5 _# Y9 {& B' ]* |9 o% D7 `2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
& O: G! c6 S7 j% Y A) M3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad? % A4 r9 C* l4 j6 S: a! a
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. " Z3 a F3 M) a0 H s
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
6 F6 v. C* d1 w2 Y" t3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house?
* ~% r3 v4 P1 K1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ! K! Y" X7 E6 p) y" a5 D/ q' |
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
. o8 ^( X) m7 k3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. : c: s& ~! z6 e u& o( ^$ U; k
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
; N2 V. }2 m8 m6 h1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
- P+ [' {. z# d+ C* X2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.! s4 g a4 \- v- _
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 5 @$ \: O+ W$ w2 H8 X1 \, o
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 6 [; W# z- k* a9 U2 X
2 E5 y# e$ G( e4 I4 JWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
2 a N/ `* r% \, z! o4 X- v1. Mothers don't do spare time.
6 W/ `' u/ E9 G3 k" X: \$ J' c$ e. U2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. ' `- S4 U! I) ?3 m! C
& I, ^8 v% E& n7 a& e4 HWhat would it take to make your mom perfect?
) q- ~" V( |8 [3 G: @ w1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
, m, q: l$ j% G) @7 g% M2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
) a! ~2 D# K7 h2 ]# @5 b) x1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 7 D" h0 d+ T N' J8 v% n
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
1 ]; u' t4 F) c2 O+ N) G3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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