 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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7 T( Q8 t2 `9 K# G5 UWhy did God make mothers?+ T) A" w$ \6 q s
% m8 K2 G7 q2 F. M1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. c4 C5 q5 y% M
2. Mostly to clean the house. ! \% x" [& g2 v" E$ W4 d
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. ! v X6 |% q9 P# V5 p2 C
: s) A, \. Z* j. G, vHow did God make mothers? 5 Q6 k/ {" o5 |4 H; R( T
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
" c4 Q0 p- F Q1 {2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
' |( G& G1 t3 M! h/ v' u3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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* I2 {4 c" O$ H1 g4 G* qWhat ingredients are mothers made of ?
" k) [% w. U i3 l* ?* y- o; S1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. ( j" A5 S" m) h8 s' C
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. 0 b$ c# O0 w3 x; ~$ i5 s
* A3 N0 c# g$ gWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
2 D. O6 l) }0 M8 B1. We're related.
! p# B6 U# `. `* _: I s( N+ O2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
0 N" b3 M1 ?2 \* W$ d! e) Z: z1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. , l1 }% o* x8 X( T) W
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 6 q4 }. ?7 [1 n; L' w* c
3. They say she used to be nice. 6 O, z a- u" Z c- ~2 W
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? ) B1 ]0 E: i) {$ h {/ z
1. His last name.' E6 g. l* j2 d2 ?
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
! B7 m+ z4 }1 D3 y$ \3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? ! I5 Z8 I1 Y# z. f
" [- h( w) u1 h$ d. WWhy did your mom marry your dad? ; B, l. e( R4 x2 M) v' ?' i
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
' ], O- y$ O J7 m" V4 f% ?# K) S2 f2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 5 R- X$ x" @7 C3 ^6 X$ F. E+ f$ @1 r' |) P
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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8 \( j5 o( \, x6 A% V5 [Who's the boss at your house?
5 s& H* ?" v$ L2 X$ K3 C, z1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ' E* H# _1 T% J0 ~& U8 k! x
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.8 O: I) ]$ j+ X* U ^+ E# H
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. 5 G4 M- u0 [% K
d- |! I b% kWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
% A& }" M) ]0 r1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
( i% f- ~4 E, q) t. f' T" ?2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.8 \2 F9 \ A) j0 h+ a3 g% A, i: E
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
3 E& T' N$ W8 x7 T& G" V2 n2 v4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 9 w- e" I0 _; N9 \" b( H
! a! X$ b) s1 y( x+ LWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
0 n) d; I2 ~$ }0 x1. Mothers don't do spare time.! Q5 i- t1 W) t5 i1 h
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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1 B9 ^5 C) h9 Y/ m" aWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? + r" C9 Z# n' o( S% t2 L, {- `
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.; d6 s( R$ O I5 S& m9 m
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
) f% U4 N; q; I6 i9 s! Y) f1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
1 j) J1 l9 g; m! j; ?9 f2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
( Q( r3 k5 {* z7 n/ \# {9 T2 T3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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