 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 7 W: y/ O; c3 \& C1 t' |
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6 ?! r, Q Y( E' H4 ~ KTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.% {; E* i% ]1 `6 }3 o
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
8 V" I, ^& P3 r5 u: d' Imake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.' y( \- Q0 E+ r1 m0 p
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ) b0 B. `4 h$ d, z J
6 F6 @# [- [2 _Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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! Q: C1 O* J4 A8 P8 d, ^1 S6 qWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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1 u4 M* a* g& P& JRinse conditioner off hair.
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4 Z ^" f, ?5 e; y- u. u7 e9 y4 @Shave armpits and legs.3 r& j# r/ U' F6 ~
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Turn off shower.
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* G9 e/ |' i( o. Z% kSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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. E( U3 C3 @. ZSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 0 R% Y! L, }, B: C& ~4 A3 v
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. $ Q# C$ |" M1 K# c4 i8 ]4 \" N, U' h
( y; T5 K! b9 x; lIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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% \$ I/ F7 S2 i6 j. z$ OHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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5 D- v" x+ k/ s0 k6 H v8 L- ~Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. . u; n. ?/ x) V
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Walk naked to the bathroom.0 Q, [ K) L3 `/ p6 H# O
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. ) j9 j7 {' s: v. M9 U
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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# @ |# E2 G/ d" q# ^Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. - |$ X$ B* n$ Q* o- ]! [4 W
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 6 A$ M! K7 I9 p
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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2 A, ~9 S; `3 m& NFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 0 c3 H @3 G! H+ ]
, F1 W2 X9 ]+ O! U$ C. H/ N5 `Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 9 v! A! ^; O0 ^
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 2 m. H; l [" |, _! v" L" [ Y
. z0 y7 N9 t" L+ `9 ^Pee. " {- c! X( c( C% \7 E, L
G/ M0 A' Z& h( J# ERinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.* T0 K$ N {' ~8 Q# F" ]& c3 d; ~( x/ S" x
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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7 s! J- y u! Y! e% p8 vAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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: B. O; U! |7 k. A" e- y" aLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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/ g" W |# p* a" LReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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