Newfie Joke

秋染红叶

A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
9 k9 H. t7 B4 W, f. a: J+ X( ]* Plong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
+ F" H) A) c/ d& \that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
* N7 F& y- c5 @, V% [8 Zthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
  
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
! }  ~$ I- z2 H+ s2 l1 o! R he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
2 }, h: y' ?; ]4 ]$ L5 I0 @2 a  r lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
1 O- c$ X. X) }  eyou pay me only $5.
8 |  T& ]& T/ m
! W# n% a* k5 K5 I! v8 W You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
1 U1 \% u- U" t! |! C" G; p will pay you $500.

This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
- ~: z, |5 O& [& z$ I3 Cthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.

$ _0 D! C! T. u; ^1 }2 W6 MThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
. l) ~4 _# g! P! v0 E9 Y5 S  i8 g" zthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
. c4 }) n" }# k/ W( K
; N9 K: J, F! Q  LThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
1 d2 r: \) p; Y9 W( B$ ]7 j, g9 Zpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
lawyer.
+ Z6 |  q7 z% k9 G% O' M
, d/ s) u  y" c( ]% d8 U" KNow, it's the newfie's turn.

He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
three legs, and comes down with four?'
" L+ d/ F$ h1 A/ s3 B6 n; F
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
: w( a3 J, W+ `( Vthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
( j/ A6 ~, x6 W7 v% p8 t/ M% Rof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
) o" r9 _0 C$ o. }. tback to sleep.

0 w: I  @  V' QThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
wakes the newfie up and asks,

'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
comes down with four?'
" ]6 V. C5 h3 s
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
and goes back to sleep.

) Z3 Y7 H- ]* ]1 Z9 l

billzhao

So funny!

5 J5 L/ b+ Q+ _Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?

stevenhou

so nice

瓦窑

>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
- @0 d" M$ n7 [9 q$ o* G
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
& z1 J0 ?) X' y' m: V6 `$ `' Y>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
: y5 _& E6 c9 ]3 M0 k1 _, T! x>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
9 J3 f! n# C' o% Z4 Y6 R/ a
. T( `. j( M8 `>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
" b. T7 }, p6 W( J>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
$ a4 Q1 }5 ~8 t3 e1 b>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
5 p$ u1 e7 L7 Y1 F
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
5 K" p& J5 M& {' Y! m3 C>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead

rstu491

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老花镜

Great

蓝色闪蝶

newfie是什么意思？小声的问一句。

眉心眉飞

加拿大人管纽芬兰省（newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

眉心眉飞

原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
the newfie would l ...

6 D2 f/ C& V* c! A. o

好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题：
“什么东西三只脚上山，四只脚下山“，
' j7 b  A3 a; f) M! d好像答案是”人“，三只脚上山，是人拄着一根拐杖上山，然后，下山的时候，手脚并用滚下来。

irish

原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
. ]. q8 r* [: h加拿大人管纽芬兰省（newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

% X2 m# w) @& W& B1 [真博学，偶像啊。

irish

原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
7 `. A& w5 {  o

: o* ?) ?$ P9 ]/ U9 z3 A
7 m( P( [3 a- s8 g: p- Q  T2 `好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题：
& `. u9 v7 R8 q1 k0 m+ ^“什么东西三只脚上山，四只脚下山“，
好像答案是”人“，三只脚上山，是人拄着一根拐杖上山，然后，下山的时候，手脚并用滚下来。

* S1 y, }5 m4 w8 k) S  V7 v! ~9 T真聪明，偶像啊

眉心眉飞

原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
5 n) d* X: X) a" \7 C
真聪明，偶像啊

7 L) E+ X* \# z  _+ l: ~9 p, }全盘接受一下。

irish

原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表

3 o7 n5 \' j4 s2 k% N9 @
全盘接受一下。

真虚怀若谷，偶像啊

眉心眉飞

原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表

  E% Y# |" i3 F2 e) k9 L, m真虚怀若谷，偶像啊

1 q4 j* F1 Q& e
% T* x& n% x' I
别把我往坏路上领啊。

irish

原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表


4 s$ o. }) G! W
: \0 \' X7 Z. ~: u  \别把我往坏路上领啊。

你已经在路上了

蓝色闪蝶

原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
加拿大人管纽芬兰省（newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

# m$ X; m! _7 G( L多谢了，我查字典都没有查出来，后来在网上搜，搜出这个意思来，觉得不可信，原来真是这个意思。

蓝色闪蝶

原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
! p) }" B% ~9 N, ]
真博学，偶像啊。

大学教授哦，能不剥削？

irish

原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表

, o, h) N! `: n1 d8 i( G大学教授哦，能不剥削？

她是大学教瘦？
大学教胖还差不多
她是NIBBLER（刚学来的，我同事居然说我也是 ）

眉心眉飞

紧张的四下张望，你谁呀？貌似身边被安插了特务了。

irish

原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
紧张的四下张望，你谁呀？貌似身边被安插了特务了。

说话真不动听 ，那叫卧底，无间道。

秋染红叶

原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
, t4 d. ~$ _, k0 Z' N紧张的四下张望，你谁呀？貌似身边被安插了特务了。

8 t+ z, ~+ L5 s, _+ i8 e6 O% b
7 E5 l) l2 |# E: z2 J* w! T哈哈，你们在这开小会呢