English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

# [3 [: e1 q/ c* x0 f" [Let's face it
6 R) m) r, ]. s' cEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
2 ^5 Q( P4 j7 V; f( v4 rNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
+ V- t) K, k, N) k2 g/ M( F  CFrench fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
0 K+ d0 ]6 c; n5 x3 \7 @. n5 CBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
: Q' n( H6 F6 s. j4 R. @/ i' oQuicksand takes you down slowly
/ A& e0 c7 D# [0 n# s  {: R" Z) @Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
0 x* c5 i( \4 k0 o" k
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
6 r- z* J' T( p" O; sIf the teacher taught,
: E7 j# ^; A) [; C0 @Why didn't the preacher praught.
- E6 l# ~0 K  Q9 u! u) F5 T/ [! P+ y
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
3 Z6 Y! N7 J8 r! FWhy do people recite at a play
2 z3 [' F- c1 ]Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
2 z  z. T( _: P* t$ g" UDrive on parkways

$ q3 H8 l8 k2 b- ?1 f! F4 xYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
( z! x, a$ p; h2 ^0 T) F
- P, I( z( Y" ^3 w+ K/ j5 F. j$ eEnglish was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
. w( c* \/ h6 m3 j  g1 D; |
7 _; C3 L4 {: I. sThat is why
When the stars are out they are visible
2 X5 m& g# U! P2 o' pBut when the lights are out they are invisible
- `9 R; I( f" A1 @% p* s; MAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
" R/ g$ s, E% h( l" k* e$ |But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
" i' z7 ?# ^- J1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
5 i/ X: z+ q! }1 v2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
  k# T3 r, o, S# r9 ^3 y3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
1 W" c+ s8 ~4 n9 ?' z4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

) t/ n/ P& i4 m, ~0 }% I9 g8 K
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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