 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?! k4 |" h [6 @1 y
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Let's face it f8 y Z5 Z# J! D& C
English is a stupid language.
: M$ X( y( ~9 R& i, ]+ lThere is no egg in the eggplant5 u+ n/ `/ ^% u! \+ F; i* l. R
No ham in the hamburger0 l; h" w6 }1 _/ g! U* E9 e
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
* l- V' \. {) x2 [' O2 M4 eEnglish muffins were not invented in England
% a, u; T* P h( i8 y ~French fries were not invented in France.
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2 W: P; C/ B& w4 T0 w1 [We sometimes take English for granted1 F M! t# ?- x1 o/ \
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
( K# y6 B1 N, b$ ~Quicksand takes you down slowly7 `% c4 F% I* N) k z
Boxing rings are square
7 k2 k7 \" L9 q7 E8 V" nAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.) }7 o. ^7 _- i
If the plural of tooth is teeth
2 i/ d' N5 }3 B' [. B( I' lShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
7 S1 K, L- w# V) p0 \2 JIf the teacher taught,
5 k, A% k. U4 S0 C" lWhy didn't the preacher praught.6 l0 b! u+ e2 V# T
$ R, a0 C( j) i) jIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
/ \7 h7 E3 x8 L& @+ H. t' R% {9 i6 A( sWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?6 S4 @/ z" z" Z0 Y3 F4 U. m# N
Why do people recite at a play$ z7 _; I4 a% |' i
Yet play at a recital?/ G6 H: C, T1 ?0 ?4 V
Park on driveways and
K$ C1 h$ I4 U) X" ~0 {$ S! YDrive on parkways0 n) l( v( m: v; Q
& F" c" ?( Q7 v# j% ]1 yYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy7 \. y9 [, _; b% z. w
Of a language where a house can burn up as
) y: X, \9 K: zIt burns down8 a8 t2 \" h' t. K
And in which you fill in a form
* I/ X5 V( O- [# O* g3 b9 {% J% I1 B! j. \By filling it out, o5 j4 G+ O5 P7 \$ k7 j
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
/ k, u8 z# a) W- ?; u; C5 T4 [9 iAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
S! O: W A, \4 C+ I Y(Which of course isn't a race at all)8 L* ?$ Z: g$ U2 r2 L7 n
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That is why& h/ h' W9 v% x- ?) E# O
When the stars are out they are visible
! y$ y2 M; B6 g/ g# vBut when the lights are out they are invisible+ K* w& N- O2 I& e
And why it is that when I wind up my watch. q+ O* i4 D4 E0 x
It starts9 W" [& P1 m" n' K* u
But when I wind up this observation,2 e i0 x/ {+ D3 d* I* ~6 l! o
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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