 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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. }7 h3 o+ d/ f" ]+ B. RI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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( a" P" J0 m8 Z# \I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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5 M7 q" D0 t% X% TI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:' w3 X+ y2 X2 y' r0 g
^# r& m& A' ]) v5 T! ?$ o"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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: u3 v! N! z! Q- u! c3 z+ HI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?+ R2 w0 E9 J. K- K {: z5 m1 |; ~: ^9 F
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And the second one was:
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6 T; ]7 n( v- @* p* c# U# u) r"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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1 Z# V. C( d* D9 J* J6 A5 X3 H: vI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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% ~ z* I( {" S& O/ k) D5 ["What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?% x+ F _- U8 D
" {; \! |" x( p4 \" wI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"6 C$ t3 t! F+ V/ c0 \, S
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.6 w2 W' T$ t( f9 T3 M, ]
?; W0 c9 y4 ?Thank you very much!7 s; A5 z8 i* O
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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0 D- v6 I" m# a! X! X( j. \' ]1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.. ?# c! e1 `+ C% T1 M
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms./ A9 E+ ]8 O( O9 o
{+ q: u4 i: v2 d# E3 x7 ^! a( V"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion., z. s2 Z2 M& K+ W
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".& m$ K9 ?( {0 h/ U# W" S! P
# n5 C' u) O5 M; J4 xRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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3 o7 \3 V. ]8 LThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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