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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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6 w% \ r2 I7 X8 z1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush7 ~; I- c2 p) [2 o* p9 ^: |( Z5 l* u
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
# a0 k2 E: i* G8 C5 xmorning.
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& i7 E9 d3 [7 w, U9 f: d) Z" J3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
6 ~& f+ \! B( q9 H4 oyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a) b; v4 i t, h9 c: a) n& R: v
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
$ j" ]! T% }3 q) r {own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest% G) k- r" f0 X% t( p
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
& Q9 H- K C2 Y) O6 U( ^go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
' w6 ^# ~' N6 r5 N9 {2 iphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
7 P' o4 {$ m. N% Fcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can! o" {( l9 Y) q! t: Q2 X+ P
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that0 M& G2 g: k) i3 j, N @
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at% x/ H2 T# W9 e5 ?/ l1 V
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot; U7 a% \6 \6 ^8 e
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
( k4 R/ \7 `6 z1 v) Q1 |vehicle through the intersection.
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0 x y+ U' t9 y+ i( Z* a% w8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour5 {0 [+ j8 a* j+ b; W
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next% }( r& E8 K z% b0 f: j
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
L% d, W, d7 vmore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,) }1 k) \+ d5 ]
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
" d' {1 O0 O1 _; Y! M; J5 |squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.- |* \' J+ O8 S) I# p# V# O0 J
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same7 Z9 Q h+ ]% ^! s
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye! i' x- W: g4 ]
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and R6 P) }4 p; m/ L
66 Street are also the same road; got it?% W9 Z1 U* U: @1 c
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
( ^. G+ ]1 e ^- X& F, H( Z0 Hshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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; T% l; p$ @4 B$ e0 w12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,: W/ c5 f( y$ v
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
- G5 r& r$ e7 v1 ~6 [accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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- `5 X0 ^: C- L" L13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
: h2 X1 K$ {4 @, a- elined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and4 G( k) k- J1 N
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
