 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
' O) |6 ~% c& X/ x u+ t6 {请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写$ J+ _( M/ T/ L: ]5 P0 T) p) ?4 w% w
6 a, Z& p* L9 l* S. H- Q1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.+ n1 P$ i6 s5 I+ [; H* R2 M
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it+ d J( N1 q6 C. f Q
down.6 E: Y, I8 {5 d7 P3 j
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down. B% E& m+ a, E2 ~& q2 i' L) x
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？$ \) N3 @" s y4 e1 s
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.2 H$ T, N* K, y* X
Let it be./ K% F7 j. l9 {. W% l
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去8 U7 |' B" M/ t: k# X0 }8 g
/ n3 E; J( h% d! K; C/ z0 e1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
# E0 T- U& H, s: [' z% a5 Pthat way.
- Z' ?; W" k1 i6 w: X5 j$ \5 @" ~1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.4 |. _1 D+ a7 d1 u
1，哭泣是敲诈$ n# f+ J/ K; g# t* T4 j6 s
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1. Ask for what you want.5 J. _- D% ?! d$ b3 z
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work! X1 T0 r+ h' q% J5 L
Strong hints do not work!$ l9 s$ X& M; ^1 @ n
Obvious hints do not work!
$ P j2 D% k) ?' `$ w& H x1 j1 a! lJust say it!
# _2 |) e- ?9 P, p. ^1，你想要什么就说
& F" o( K ]! A我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
k& l q* c. U3 m+ kquestion./ _7 v0 k) C7 T- h# x& n% V1 C
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's# W3 {8 j* S% w( H
what we do.4 J& U. R) B. P$ B0 E% j
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
; S, O9 b5 M. i( A: B6 I1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
* F* |- L: v7 ]1 s0 h1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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5 M5 R' N" {# K- t) q' N) b8 C1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.0 x. y/ ?' w0 ?5 e" Z- i
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
: S, H+ L: L# x5 r) g, G0 S我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了, ^7 P! T2 F4 G
, w* R5 ~! ~1 W& M0 x1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us, I2 I8 a J2 N" h% J T
to act like soap opera guys.
9 u( b5 k/ R( J. h9 u& p: A1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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G. ]; E( ^1 h/ `' j% j4 \+ ~1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
7 c5 k5 L/ [5 I, }* f0 d. {0 @4 h1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们" Z$ [! d$ Z `. \- o1 ?
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways3 ?, ^1 [1 F. p# r+ L
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.* X& H- Z0 F; T
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。/ P+ g+ r9 z0 }# L
1 f/ `/ m7 L- R6 C1 U; S（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）- ]" R# c( Y: F+ O8 k `% L& [
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
6 \0 r. I- b8 @! n \7 C& idone. Not both.! c5 U- _5 r- Q# J1 p* v
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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. k' x% s& E" D+ Z8 S* F" f: G& x6 j. {* ]1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during' s: j3 U( ]5 a/ g9 z
commercials.
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* K6 w/ h. o; |% }1 l& }* G1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.0 L) T7 L% W1 Y- P
& |) [; G* [1 |/ K+ y ~* Y1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.3 `+ o4 K" ?" V- Y& [
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
0 l8 X; E/ m7 s/ S( }0 nWe have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.' z- f$ O# n3 ?! f# |) Y) L% Z
# f+ o. D- G; r2 e1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
! t! d* E9 w) w: B) Lnothing's wrong.6 ^/ _) n! @ g, r4 v
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer% j. a0 B6 @9 K9 Q; ^
you don't want to hear.& P# Z; S8 h9 { {* V$ s
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is, f U; U6 [/ [, c A2 J4 C: g
fine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
7 l. o+ t8 B' r# qdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.! m, y0 Z6 e. X! c0 S
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1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.
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' E: l, b& g5 d4 l5 q$ |9 H5 O1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!. ^$ [& _: N6 T& x
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
# j) L( }6 c/ `% JBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.) D4 ?$ g2 p# O" h w4 P: w
! ^: A$ R5 f# k; g! J1 o* KPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
" s+ f; S) p2 |% {: q; ^Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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