 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!# D& H5 j/ ], E4 j
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写9 R) j K3 G3 }, q/ B/ E, [
% I7 P) r. r7 w1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.* D; |/ |3 A: w' w; Z& a
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫# O/ G( M4 }3 J
7 D8 k0 j4 X0 ^& |( j( O0 r. I1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
1 I: I' e6 H' a+ _3 T5 cdown.1 P l& S& [6 g# q9 Y
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 5 T B' g! G1 b) M3 F0 N- p
you
, x% X" ^2 N0 O! A" L8 e( ~leaving it down." h. ]6 j3 R. r' M. F/ x
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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, S. W+ V( U# y' i; g9 K8 e1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. O3 A: a; b8 d1 w3 m6 x O: v" T
Let it be.
1 u' u5 B' P4 n+ g2 @ a1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去. V+ C* l/ {9 M3 y+ k' {/ X
, p% l, a# T1 w9 I5 D5 J/ s1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it) S3 }( Y( i( d: O
that way.
( d- H/ Y& D6 S. z1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！9 ?/ e' z2 G7 {8 Q. S' _
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1. Crying is blackmail., L- J7 y6 u* E, Y
1，哭泣是敲诈1 B1 s* Z: n5 c; ~3 S# f
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1. Ask for what you want.0 L7 f' Q! {2 L' y- E
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!3 `' c( y% r/ Y3 A$ G& K
Strong hints do not work!" Q- k1 r+ ?4 B X1 R% B6 q
Obvious hints do not work!( q6 K# Q5 y$ g' z2 G2 ^
Just say it!
. M# h, O; P+ W% H/ b1，你想要什么就说
1 R% [" w/ Q) S. v0 J我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
4 ?% _3 ]7 V3 N5 |2 r# yquestion.
6 a- j6 }; u+ M3 p3 C8 T ~1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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9 G, ^9 ~. ]# g: i4 p1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's0 ~- y7 c5 |+ N, [3 a
what we do.
* j4 B5 w+ B5 V* _0 p3 N$ HSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.6 O$ D$ g- @" l8 x8 d& U' h/ |
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。3 g& \$ h9 u+ L% p3 x3 @( Z! V) c J
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1 i3 Z" h/ t) @ u' h Z1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.7 v# @7 t) s" |# G( u- x
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.# R8 k; x" J8 t( ~( h% G8 f' m3 ~) F
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
7 E/ Y% Y7 ^3 s7 K' y; x) nto act like soap opera guys.: k4 n" l) W/ M' _( E* x, O2 e! F, z
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们% c( |# f9 [1 [6 u) I$ U8 a
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
7 h9 J2 f0 ] c5 l; T' `1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们" O1 T8 X Q( W, M% V
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways: I( b5 Q" o6 }+ c$ ~* x
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
X& Z6 I- N+ U* a1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。4 z% x' V$ M- X. e5 j0 B
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
- @( y' r# w/ r+ T1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
8 Q# e9 i( _/ X U0 {0 Q7 tdone. Not both.
) U& f7 r+ H# _If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.( Q6 ]2 X# b( B7 w. e9 W' s
# b8 j7 J7 c' x. l1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
' l9 r5 e6 V. t2 H- Gcommercials.
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) `; O% H; d7 \1 t) @" K1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
" P1 Z2 p* T; TPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. h' G; Q1 {" D' m: s+ J) e
We have no idea what mauve is.* K5 a3 v1 d! I- U" c
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that./ S" p4 o- m+ B# Q% t3 F+ n
$ T9 a3 @/ I7 V0 y, t2 g1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
- J) Q& e0 W" H! k5 F5 g- Anothing's wrong. g/ s Z) y+ B& d
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.$ t I+ K( H' M( a/ L
6 m4 }+ W2 k; h1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer; X+ X5 S8 S8 q5 ?+ _7 s
you don't want to hear.& d% l C& U- z5 q/ o3 t6 D, r
" G4 D) T' l O( S8 o1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is6 h3 `- }1 j8 n' k T+ a( s
fine...Really.
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. k4 K; b; A: N1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
( d" P5 H+ T5 l/ O5 O" [discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf./ [% ?! H3 X Z* |* Z: S* `7 F
! m& J! A5 Q# h8 _3 R# Z2 V1. You have enough clothes.
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) x, o6 C5 X7 S0 \! c1. You have too many shoes.0 a! J- }6 k$ p/ _. ?
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!3 k/ l* P1 K- T, Y; Y
' H5 ]7 V1 k) w+ G7 d1. Thank you for reading this.
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" ^+ ]- s* E* @. L/ _$ Y7 ?Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
; Z1 B6 b" o/ IBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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, D" {; s4 i/ n5 q8 E! w8 \, l& tPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
/ x. O1 Y. }9 s& YPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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