 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!" H* v- I" d" |' O ?) Y% w u
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写2 g$ S: ~' S: ]9 Q
- ^- b# k! ?4 R- n$ b; h; S) o1 H* y1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
- a/ _! a+ o c0 L1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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A9 a( e2 M0 \5 Y( W1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
$ B: @- {+ E( X' t# y/ [6 B( O, ^/ Kdown.
% a6 f" O/ O) t+ UWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about ( E5 ^7 i, q( M- c: e
you! x. L( r8 L7 }) E
leaving it down.
# j. `# X& Z6 E6 @- b. n5 R( {1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. q+ O2 J- }0 D0 R- T
Let it be.& L+ N7 z& g% n. ]
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去1 h5 T8 q0 ?' {! k
% i7 b0 o( D; N) j) B1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
7 v4 d$ p7 }/ _0 w+ J- C- tthat way.7 u' X- i* f' {$ W) G
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！, O' B: T+ t2 b/ I& I. t
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1. Crying is blackmail.$ C+ T/ o: q0 A2 x
1，哭泣是敲诈! Q# D6 J" e. O* G+ x5 V( V
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1. Ask for what you want.9 ^* M) b6 O* {( k6 k) l& c
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
) _& k6 e0 a# o. FStrong hints do not work!/ t8 D9 k3 s8 E$ s
Obvious hints do not work!
; A) ]: j! p: ?$ fJust say it!3 i6 W) X A0 q8 v: `5 H4 N
1，你想要什么就说9 I7 m0 K1 Y! S1 h/ E, u
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！ y# P2 R! B% b1 r3 B- N, l7 a
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every 8 d' r& M/ m6 p+ g% G7 P* T" T
question. S" B5 H7 f$ m0 o
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）' [$ y1 U7 N' H3 a
% s/ p8 u/ L( A2 o6 F1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
; E: p$ U4 R# }4 ]8 a# ~# V* d/ o% iwhat we do.& ^7 t f7 D$ B! p3 Y
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.+ S6 ~: u* K$ V! B
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。. Y3 i" S# ~6 D
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
. e- h; }8 k& M$ U- u+ r$ T1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
3 q8 ~; i J8 V; OIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.' Y% k) C9 B2 n% q6 Q
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us$ t& L7 t. Z) F' y+ k
to act like soap opera guys.) ?1 [$ X! b1 B0 y
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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) D$ p4 U. T! i5 f" o1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.$ @" q8 R7 {$ V5 s \6 A
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们7 v. W& Q8 P) B/ \# e# y% L( n
; f: E+ e) c. m9 t) Q- x8 u1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
" v: x6 d2 G5 t8 d. T/ tmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
( j) ^5 g7 {& q9 ] s! Q1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。7 w6 U$ E* q. P
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）0 N2 @ Q1 ]# M4 `; f A4 U
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it4 F5 Z- o% q' E# q" V* S
done. Not both.1 ^0 z! u% Q6 h5 F1 V
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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( [; ?2 M& |/ a; M& p' ^: C2 o1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during0 B! I; X& D: \4 S
commercials.8 E# {5 c7 b# A: x% E( `
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.; @% W. s- E# \' R
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.5 f9 B; W8 R0 p& ^) v( I
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.$ L$ S, u0 _9 k- t
We have no idea what mauve is.4 {" d& S/ U7 k ]2 i
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like# W1 l& I& G* N( d
nothing's wrong.
; M& ^. w( F, rWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer( Y% H( C1 c7 J5 S0 N
you don't want to hear.1 j* W: b$ M/ y1 u
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is" G0 u8 T( [8 f9 w: Q) q( f+ ]
fine...Really.. k/ l: P( ?# ?. T7 Q& ]% f) F
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to8 @7 [4 |$ l- }) ?# a& q6 @
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.7 |% _/ V2 u: R+ x) P
' e( {( ~( |5 h w# N- O- x3 a1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.
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& P! ^$ X' X5 ^& A( M1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!# [) [6 f( _4 l' r
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1. Thank you for reading this.% g8 C3 {7 {) {8 W: b b
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
5 X; I) ]1 ^7 c) nBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.) _# B6 q5 s( o1 n7 o. s
! U& N6 n" ?/ f# w- ~& [Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
( N8 A/ ]( b3 JPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
