 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
/ J9 G7 D; v, K0 J0 n2 |' m C请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写0 j% t" m5 h. U9 Y0 ~5 N
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
/ N2 Y( G; P0 Z5 l$ ~1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫+ }# z( e1 t4 O+ n# N* T% k
1 G3 k2 v; V2 k- u1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
/ A& t R/ a+ e9 Rdown.* j j& p0 p4 ~# v' g4 M
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about + R6 {# x6 O# X7 C. w$ C& H
you
; d, C4 E, ?* E/ ileaving it down.# t6 ^2 p" m/ r1 c* L
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
) l$ r6 }" }- \% s6 W5 cLet it be.8 ]( C) P% V1 `' w; w! ~- e
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去# N- ?# i: s' f2 {0 a$ m8 R0 @' y6 O
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
( P, q, o8 D2 n+ bthat way.
) o3 l) N8 i5 i% C# m) T) I1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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) P+ y9 E, B8 A0 }8 y/ T2 l1. Crying is blackmail.+ K# Z2 P3 V8 i7 `7 n! ]% I
1，哭泣是敲诈" V0 R0 L5 o# s- N0 t7 A. y
7 t; o, e4 n+ D/ W7 C$ i8 z1. Ask for what you want.
$ \. [5 F" N% i0 VLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
+ D' A# n# Y: {; [. wStrong hints do not work!
" K6 R5 ^1 Y0 f8 X" A' q$ RObvious hints do not work!
, i' @ o K6 c8 D& pJust say it!$ v! u& e! g: q7 B1 ^2 o
1，你想要什么就说
4 a+ p5 P' T- a6 q$ T我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！2 L) r6 Q+ X1 g. z+ ^
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
- E; h( S2 S% P6 ~# o- |3 `question.: i) ?5 e2 w% y) M8 B3 I
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）7 F' ^% a8 |5 N( s2 l
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's& k: e$ a! O; t, @) o0 K
what we do.
; u% a* @$ ~6 l6 F/ Y: m) \Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.$ p, n3 w: Z6 n
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。- y3 K9 g; s% \2 }1 L/ f% F
$ ~1 u6 T" E0 @3 J7 z: Q. x1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
7 J* m8 E# F( ^; t8 O1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.$ J1 v7 l- D. u" V2 S: P
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.1 \; u! I3 W1 \; N) _
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us, ^$ C+ U- T+ ^/ R
to act like soap opera guys.. O2 x" N* R5 S+ F5 l2 g9 H
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们# K7 ]' H2 x, L; I& d4 Q. k
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.' e' O3 Y3 u' s* ~: }
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们% k4 k( k" \! D# Y4 ]
: {' ^$ ~& z) s: S N# V- E, a1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
+ \2 v9 Y! C8 o% T5 n' vmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.: ]4 n/ {" W* G3 U8 X6 k7 m2 G
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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* N) v K6 m& Y, z4 T) Q/ t; c5 j（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
7 H) u R+ I, }1 q. ^' ~# y1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it6 ]; D- H# ?) _' ]/ L* @
done. Not both.
, \$ z% s5 ]( NIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.5 t7 f: c, q; a9 o
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
7 E2 t# W4 \/ j7 L! B9 J& o; ^commercials.
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' z% e* o" d( I( F5 U! V1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.. G" B# _3 |. a. m: `, _
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
" \ N g% f8 ePeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.2 l; C+ s% B$ L0 w
We have no idea what mauve is.' I# Q' \- i1 [4 M, U/ V. U
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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6 o/ g8 F! ]/ j4 O" v/ c1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like4 Z) W, w' `; x0 T2 [9 ^' ^
nothing's wrong.
# G) k) I( d; w* P$ |8 M; mWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.5 ?0 N+ D+ ?" }% v2 F0 l" N* w
: I% w# D8 l" _, A1 l( j c1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer7 M: r5 n9 R: x" O! f+ T: y
you don't want to hear.
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# A) F/ v3 L6 x; r& @1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
/ h" U ~8 d2 A+ M1 Yfine...Really. I1 @( H- M; j5 U: V1 a
- }) y( [. b. i: R. D" ^; @1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
7 u9 H) \5 d2 i0 Tdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.5 ]3 u. c: L8 U- M8 f/ @
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1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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# R: p+ ^1 T/ Y1 n" P0 LYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;+ q0 l. Y! I+ ~2 N; f& P
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping., Q: V: [3 r9 M5 B$ o
. [, H2 ^# y4 ^0 V/ r+ F. C. D2 ePass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.- F& o+ ]; E* {7 E9 Q) l
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
