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the longest word in the English language

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2012-4-14 13:24 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
本帖最后由 billzhao 于 2013-3-21 17:25 编辑
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Question: What is the longest word in the English language? ; v3 ]: J; d2 A5 a

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& i5 k# o2 ?% w0 {Answer: smiles
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$ J  ], _! W/ D' j! ~1 v! j" f8 R7 WWhy?
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5 A  P2 d" g5 G1 tBecause there is a mile between the first and last letters.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:27 | 显示全部楼层
Maria found America: i3 C: y; r* N4 P
Why? Not Columbia? Take a look at the class:7 F* W. \  s1 p8 W0 D+ i+ V/ J; A
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Teacher: Maria, please point to America on the map.
# X& x1 b' }. X$ V$ P* YMaria: This is it.
4 N$ S& ~3 h6 F- h) [Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? & E5 D2 O3 v8 ^7 r; }+ B
Class: Maria did.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:30 | 显示全部楼层
The following is an old joke, which is consistent with our Chinese saying 无事献殷勤非奸即盗
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: y! B' e3 ^, C& [! _3 d$ L0 wA Scotsman who was driving home one night, ran into a car driven by an Englishman. The Scotsman got out of the car to apologize and offered the Englishman a drink from a bottle of whisky. The Englishman was glad to have a drink.
9 T3 w% V' d! W  r8 e"Go on," said the Scot, "have another drink."
# @9 l$ x6 a" Y& k  m8 G1 jThe Englishman drank gratefully. "But don't you want one, too?" he asked the Scotsman.
; [' x, f9 W% m"Perhaps," replied the Scotsman, "after the police have gone."
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
本帖最后由 billzhao 于 2012-4-14 13:39 编辑 7 h  ~  ?: h! W/ N) w1 k

- {2 Q& k, c: o  @1 d4 Z9 `3 K你可以对警察说,我想你是个混蛋% J) O2 g. I6 j, N, T3 \# {5 D! s# |
You CAN say that you think somebody is a jerk, especially when this person is a cop who gave you a ticket. Take a look:
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A man was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he thought he was driving just fine.
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Officer: You were speeding.
) @4 L9 O, h; ^8 _* ^Man: No, I wasn't.
8 N# E: y+ i8 J' H1 c1 Q/ IOfficer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket.
3 C# q. f" F+ O: ?3 I1 ?Man: But I wasn't speeding.3 c4 I0 O, j8 s* c$ M' A4 {/ m1 j
Officer: Tell that to the judge! (The officer gives man the ticket.)
) ~% s; c/ Q* w0 MMan: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk?
/ c: C) q+ W3 b1 d! \5 JOfficer: Yes, you would.
/ \8 n  J" U+ c& ?) fMan: What if I just thought that you were?
/ O* }: `6 W+ z, H. P) ~Officer: I can't give you a ticket for what you think.7 |4 {+ o7 M# G$ U
Man: Fine, I think you're a jerk!
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:35 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 billzhao 于 2012-4-14 13:38 编辑
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1 d1 Z3 \* E: i5 r为什么男人们总问这个问题
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"Am I the first man you have ever loved?" he said.% l, ?7 k& ~" e
"Of course," she answered "Why do men always ask the same question?".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:37 | 显示全部楼层
老鼠在你家里干什么) F6 \% d7 v9 K: P) p
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A: I'm in a big trouble!
9 q2 ?1 E3 \, Q4 v) u  I4 aB: Why is that?+ d' s* C% E3 f
A: I saw a mouse in my house!
0 h8 Z7 A+ I8 N/ kB: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap.
; [/ o5 ?& G2 H# F, G+ ?0 m3 `A: I don't have one.! S6 o0 B1 I5 \/ M: g! _
B: Well then, buy one.- p! s2 I/ q( Q: g8 g
A: Can't afford one.
5 Z: I7 u+ V3 v: @B: I can give you mine if you want." y# M  N/ B- T. d4 i' L5 k
A: That sounds good.3 n# w, }' a2 e) I+ ^4 a
B: All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the mouse come to the trap.# A4 x+ x; H. C/ ~" |9 x
A: I don't have any cheese.
+ R) ^) e- Y$ C7 a. Q3 [5 n' B! hB: Okay then, take a piece of bread and put a bit of oil in it and put it in the trap.: \' m5 H0 D; D" ^$ E* ^
A: I don't have oil.
0 N8 `! p# F( n0 P& r4 D7 MB: Well, then put only a small piece of bread.
% p, N# q6 U. U  `4 qA: I don't have bread.
$ r" H4 J: @1 I7 H2 AB: Then what is the mouse doing at your house?!
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:40 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
等一分钟2 Z7 J) w9 p% I

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The man: "God, how long is a million years?"5 S& m& V# c$ x4 f0 q5 q2 ]
God: "To me, it's about a minute."
) ]: X' L4 _( M) F9 }% H& N( {The man: "God, how much is a million dollars?"
  b4 j% W1 N- ?God: "To me it's a penny."0 D( w3 I5 u* V( H% J5 Y3 l; i3 l
The man: "God, may I have a penny?"4 s# N" k7 [2 \, B0 r5 F
God: "Wait a minute."
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:44 | 显示全部楼层
Why couldn't Cinderella be a good soccer player?
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She lost her shoe, she ran away from the ball, and her coach was a pumpkin. " y; l& l- ~2 Y) l* T* Z' v8 V
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(Requires basic knowledge of the Cinderella story and that both ball and coach have double meanings.)
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:45 | 显示全部楼层
I is or I am
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Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
6 W; u+ M, K! J: I/ ~) I1 E# ZStudent: I is the..., ^1 Y/ M. `3 z4 M, R+ A
Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".
3 ~9 V, }! e% _/ TStudent: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:52 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
本帖最后由 billzhao 于 2012-4-14 14:06 编辑
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Q: What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?
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A: An envelope.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:54 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 billzhao 于 2012-4-14 14:05 编辑
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- @3 w2 o! v3 u. c8 IQ: What travels around the world and stays in a corner? / k  ~! O# }4 ]; {. R6 l

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- H# d2 ]+ `# U* P9 S- g. d. @& Y  nA: A stamp.
大型搬家
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:55 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 billzhao 于 2012-4-14 14:05 编辑   p6 {2 `: |2 E

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+ e! @; M/ f* Z# t, yA: A blackboard.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-4-14 13:59 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
本帖最后由 billzhao 于 2012-4-14 14:02 编辑 ) v) F" G- U) X2 O7 s; j

' x% p+ g- f2 b3 I& }Riddles of Alphabet4 h) W# Q& h9 Q1 V
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Q: What letter of the alphabet is an insect?
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Q: What letter is a part of the head? 3 q5 u" Q( i4 r# U. n
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A: I. (eye)0 s& E' x. P* W$ D8 [. a* o

2 H1 ~6 _2 S% L" Y6 p5 z$ N) [Q: What letter is a drink?
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7 J' m; k1 j& p( j8 Y& ~Q: What letter is a vegetable?
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Q: What letter is an exclamation?
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Q: What letter is a European bird?
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A: Y. (why)
. [/ i: V  p6 [  \- x) @5 R4 I" e! J! o0 {  |4 z9 G$ k; x6 b
Q: What four letters frighten a thief? 5 T3 S8 l8 M, H& W0 K+ b/ J' d1 e

$ x0 X: k1 u7 H% A  Z' J# ?9 y+ D: k+ E6 b
1 F" l" h2 N; \! K; D/ F

3 B: P8 ]5 d1 S1 k$ \0 A! g+ P- M' s7 |
- ?) ]9 w6 H3 U7 S; h9 o
3 ?# Z- Z( X) \, {9 J

3 j" }+ ^& ~  r
( Y3 ?$ \& y. x% t  |6 T% v2 W8 _
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3 T2 s8 N" S" o7 x: P. n, L( Q0 k$ m1 w

) V7 o2 j, W; @* \) T# \1 m3 N- [3 {& o9 K, s
- R) |" z7 L0 \; q; u

) d% s: ]9 P; N1 u( @( m5 D4 m/ _  a3 q8 y: D' v3 }! h3 R: g7 J( F/ w
7 _( \$ J: I8 _* t
* ?- d5 Y0 L4 P1 N4 C! ~; F% a

. |7 j! @6 o3 P  j2 H6 }+ x  Z2 ?5 l0 I

$ V  a$ v# I) Y: [5 g9 @) @
# n6 a* I8 u6 i1 xA: O.I.C.U. (Oh I see you!)
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0 p4 S. w3 w* E  K9 q( QQ: What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment but not once in a thousand years?
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8 R4 m- V3 U( ~/ r2 ~( \! o

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7 ]1 r, U, _" M2 _( [) ~

2 r; R, V5 q: ]$ W2 b3 A
* p; g" [+ O7 M5 g; q- [. p% }% R* k4 i! N2 B
: G/ F. ?' \) K+ s& N
4 @+ Z# j) Z# P2 A4 M

7 i: p4 C) g8 x; u: S8 Y8 t: n2 r; {% D$ Y3 n) e4 \. g' h

" }+ U# E- @/ |
7 a) h$ p' M( h2 W: n) i7 o1 X7 J# w) V. a( d

" B9 q3 k" ]+ \  X9 b4 C3 t3 o8 g
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7 R# q  [: y9 V$ c/ A" W! k2 X) Y

3 Q* B- j5 J1 c9 Q8 r
# N7 o0 g7 w- Q: \A: The letter "m".
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Q: Why is the letter "T" like an island ? 4 X, I1 P2 A- a
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0 O9 ?4 ?/ v/ W6 Q, o8 P. g
( D) T/ b$ n9 d+ i7 |8 y/ T

* A% t7 N' f1 l8 ?3 r) i
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$ g! J9 m2 c, p( \7 q9 o* R
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* t8 r% B: ^4 C7 `/ w4 q
' c8 Y4 D$ I4 ~0 ?& M5 y8 W8 ]

; z5 H# O8 s( X2 P8 R0 }* x
3 z" {) i+ B- |/ k0 t' G: [' X+ E; T  b; |9 y& N/ e- Z6 b0 o
- n. J. s) G; J  e# Q/ N

0 Q3 f7 p  |1 k7 _  q5 d" C8 b
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A: Because it is in the middle of waTer.' |4 i1 U- r1 K+ W
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Q: In what way can the letter "A" help a deaf lady? " F! n2 R/ N! M$ H  e& A

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. g& V# B2 I8 v" Q1 p. ~
8 E: F) \4 a2 J8 Z# F3 ~- u  g, o+ g% E" q& W! |
9 v6 h+ }: W& }
; U5 u& m" C. ]6 ?

, P& M0 c5 F0 M" S& @& L% I0 C' R0 T
/ k; t9 z7 w5 m& ^( p; O
) t- H  L; _4 I. g, z6 g6 D$ ]
- a' h3 v" }$ B  Y& R4 e

- ?* Q  ?& p6 ~; s0 A# v
$ c) r/ L4 I, R* l2 X; g4 C
2 ]5 U: Y4 r# f* g0 D7 R- C3 v+ x0 i- K8 D: ?

3 K( x7 D6 G' T- s
, T7 {/ l# y5 L7 EA: It can make "her" "hear.) k" A8 @" J: a- H: K2 O7 r* `
# N. X# x% M3 Y2 s
Q: Which is the loudest vowel? ! A( M0 b" x% J. Q% ?
! f$ o0 z+ O- x# f
$ K2 b, Q: V5 U8 a

' w7 M7 K1 m, B: q( a) ]/ ^; N  Y& m; b8 M7 g; \6 U
$ L' L$ G; X/ Y# }0 A
" u, K# G' S! |1 A0 G5 B

" c4 N  q! {2 y( c, [8 e7 |" x( T/ X2 G. H7 g4 k

1 ]+ @. m) j$ `9 m" B  M+ U1 F8 O" K6 t

- Q; c" ]' w8 F7 r) i8 H5 O6 |- B, [6 Q0 X# q- S, ^
8 U+ ^! I( P& f, Z+ A

1 ^7 X0 u' m0 t* X, E0 a$ h% _. y* A. y, r( e, x& x4 T

6 ^, O8 f' V4 V9 a9 T9 Y
' P6 U8 ~" `/ _$ t: R" o7 X  [) ^2 t% l4 r" |. C

( [' {$ N- V) t: w* Z" w: J* t. u, H! @* E' J$ }
A: The letter "I". It is always in the midst of noise
6 k( K" `& m& `- V) Z) v+ m, n% i: {2 M
Q: What way are the letter "A" and "noon" alike? - O/ ~# c$ N0 y( q
5 u+ N  P2 {+ z* x
8 A/ y) u. K, L

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, F1 b. V8 W7 T" _0 `3 E  X7 f
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+ V. F8 C4 o7 b: J$ K# A; S8 k4 w9 Y

+ v8 O. R5 u+ Z+ q3 L/ g- x6 ?. g$ h
" }0 r" e' {) w" N" G1 l. A$ O3 O$ }, L1 V5 g9 y

0 ?4 ?5 C/ I) n$ G2 [7 C; N. `! M! E6 s/ F# \

! u. ?( [( n$ J) A- f* R! W# t- h
$ O8 T% v* `2 W- G" Y9 u6 n, e; Y/ M2 e

/ T( Y2 O3 j% _3 s2 B6 a5 m" ^1 S2 Y

6 W5 p! r% z/ [
3 F; y5 |  _. w* t1 A" ]( U3 @( `, C
' I) c! G% P! J4 v; l* }8 FA: Both of them are in the middle of the "day".
8 ^3 p/ s' j7 ~2 G. C/ M# F% \% ~# R- h; I- i
Q: Why is "U" the happiest letter?
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4 S/ `  E! O5 F2 y+ \1 ^6 G: h. h+ z! e

6 h5 A8 X, |6 D/ P
# H% T% [# a4 |* V% Z
5 C+ g7 r0 C$ C" l  ~" g
% n0 v7 K- s9 t, ^5 Y+ m  E3 y+ M/ N& s3 y
1 Z$ z$ @' s6 `2 v8 l
" m4 b* M2 p( ~3 b/ |; v

" v! p, H6 T8 f) n  F; n1 X- @7 m

0 l, d; d9 r8 U7 v, k' R- i, Z$ E
9 m5 ^) q* Y6 I+ x& a3 ]; T
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A: Because it is in the middle of "fun".
, o% H+ X1 S& ^( O3 w1 w% T1 r4 c6 O  F% e' `/ U+ f1 {$ Z
Q: What word of only three syllables contains 26 letters? ) @4 s  N+ m8 j8 B8 d& i
' R- m. M( k" P! ?4 D

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3 k- p2 D# G1 M7 X! a  B6 a+ i6 o0 C- O& {

) P: X, F+ B  P8 ]6 U, j: N1 X# w" o0 U6 H* _) d
1 i/ o, |# u- g- S$ |
, X/ x2 l4 m% k7 q0 @0 y! d

6 M0 s5 t3 e& S7 i1 f- x2 K+ n4 k' y
$ ?5 j5 r  N( L. ?' N

/ w! M2 E$ k3 h) M6 Y; s/ G1 S& i9 o/ A* `) {, J

3 o7 F& G5 d  c5 \6 J; d- Q6 X9 {. b5 l7 m
A: Alphabet = (26 letters)4 _9 M3 x" L, m- i

  o5 E9 T. F  d* r: e9 o; \$ oQ: What relatives are dependent on "you"?5 G, A9 r2 [  M( G$ ~  z

* y2 ^+ z4 R! H6 q1 @2 y5 O7 d0 V% \' a

& c8 M4 g) }+ h& z
2 B6 v9 |. @6 a5 d7 l. v1 S, f# s+ t$ C% a9 z3 x& j

& C( U1 ~8 B; P( W/ A7 s" m
; S* o2 m- h# e0 A
3 [# O1 G% N: B8 L: G
, L7 c0 L1 N/ G/ v8 w3 G* p2 y' E; W8 Z8 w5 Q

/ }3 H& q  [) m8 \
5 i$ d6 O0 f) I& u! M: \  Z1 T5 Y+ k: i* Z; R. S* D* {$ m
# d0 i9 d/ k" [0 ]; R' _
9 u8 c( m9 \; _0 x9 O3 {& {% A: h

4 }- T3 P+ ?! ]+ t3 PA: Aunt, uncle, cousin. They all need "U"./ p7 f2 Y% C, j9 F# U
3 v" R! V7 X/ ?3 d
Q: What is the end of everything? # J& [8 l7 J" P6 W
1 C- T3 n; [3 @6 j, n
9 ]% p% ?  m; p; S- [+ F1 Y
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# e! }( l! X0 `: G5 a' C) `9 O$ o

2 j! X* [. y4 f# ]% o! u% G+ A4 B- A5 g$ W! Z- |5 G/ [

& F/ k; F$ @& [, d3 i
9 y( a4 l9 K8 F" I8 P8 ~5 E' Z( ?4 v8 W) A$ f6 d

1 o3 |1 j1 f5 @+ o# D6 r# c
( `/ V( D" k1 a/ M4 {: ]5 [" u1 V1 x) c% `! |

9 M! _) t& m! y, B
, A% `1 l/ A1 z( t& S9 k: k/ B% x3 G0 J. Q5 j% u! q3 h( a* e, H1 G

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A: The letter "g".
鲜花(122) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2012-4-14 22:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
鲜花(49) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2012-5-5 16:15 | 显示全部楼层
尘肺???????????
鲜花(49) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2012-5-5 16:20 | 显示全部楼层
pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis3 X2 I5 A) [- T3 J

* `$ q0 {5 c( J/ R- d+ u补充内容 (2012-5-16 12:51):
* @; e* G) [) q9 t' JI did not know those sources of the word, thanks!
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2012-5-15 06:52 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-5-15 11:04 | 显示全部楼层
CANDYMAN 发表于 2012-5-5 16:20
& K1 ]+ q% ^1 z) S2 w: vpneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis

; ]/ c, W5 a# P4 P- lgreat job
鲜花(75) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2012-5-29 10:32 | 显示全部楼层
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
鲜花(647) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2012-5-30 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
不就是\smile吗
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发表于 2012-6-8 12:31 | 显示全部楼层
435t45rhrthrt
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2012-8-28 08:14 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
鲜花(163) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2012-8-30 13:45 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
9楼的笑话没看懂哦?
鲜花(156) 鸡蛋(2)
发表于 2012-9-11 16:22 | 显示全部楼层
shelley.micheal 发表于 2012-8-30 14:45
) [) a/ E; `; `2 _/ Y9楼的笑话没看懂哦?

  M; u* ]% R9 G' K  ]$ h* |6 z; h/ G  i以I开头造句:8 D2 p2 _0 g3 k3 Y  x5 x
他本来想说:I是第9个字母。但是老师不允许I后接is。所以接了am,结果意思变成我是第9个字母。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-21 17:27 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
billzhao 发表于 2012-4-14 13:45 + R' U5 `8 Q& }' ^3 i# |
I is or I am
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5 l) C) p+ F' u! R, d: JTeacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
( U8 B$ X* w' L: U6 ^( p) u
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-21 17:29 | 显示全部楼层
fushiyu 发表于 2012-9-11 16:22 0 A% w$ D' L! c8 |  f; q4 Q4 I
以I开头造句:* B3 K) ^5 @+ s2 Q- V
他本来想说:I是第9个字母。但是老师不允许I后接is。所以接了am,结果意思变成我是第9个字 ...
- W: Z/ h& e5 |
The ninth letter is I
  a. s6 O* J1 h0 `/ n% I  f2 j"I" is the ninth letter
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发表于 2013-3-24 15:05 | 显示全部楼层
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