In the garden of my heart

Dawson

听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！

In the garden of my heart
: ~" ]3 x' J/ N- QYou planted a tree
( V) t* N% r/ uFrom sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
3 ^. s# s# G2 |# R7 _' Y$ B7 V5 ]+ [; O7 WNourished with my soul
Devoured my sorrow by thee

5 R  E- x5 J' I  `5 Z. EIn the memory of my life
You planted a dream
Should the sky fall down on me
/ z) u: u$ c. |3 w& jMay promises fade in the sea
+ \/ J- @. N8 F  w4 Z# bSewing back every broken pieces
2 |. E4 t" @3 P, dBursting the love out of me
& B  ?! T1 C3 J! u
  U6 i$ t  A  I" b[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]

云山水月

原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
+ b% X% m7 a7 c! N$ p9 {' l4 s! X听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！
5 ^. n0 O, F0 B7 `3 d
0 H  t& P# j0 C' s+ r4 d! o3 hIn the garden of my heart
You planted a tree
From sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
- d$ Y1 A# a* s. [- MNourished with my soul
' q# h2 ]( c, W' n' A$ I' kDevoured my so ...

- z2 L# ]  P0 v. H
眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？

7 p( R# d8 V; O( I; n写得真好。

2 W! g+ `8 Y* D& M加精加精！

Greatwall

哥们儿，你没喝多吧？没事就过来烧烟啊！

九月

汗！居然有２单词不认识。：（

Justing

原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？
写得真好。
, y) l0 v8 W4 r5 j3 {1 S5 ^加精加精！

我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗

五月

如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

微澜

原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表
  Q. J: P$ ~) k. H如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

' \8 P' Y6 k' g! |4 P$ U9 i- u五月JJ这个意境，想想实在是罗曼蒂克，不过在爱屯，海天相接是没有了，只有在湖畔雪山了：）

朱顺顺

Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
7 t2 E- b. _7 S7 v* |7 V0 X+ i
! U# w" S9 k/ B) f$ s" vSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

Dawson

原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
5 e2 J( o2 u9 i  V) ?+ R- Y9 BShould the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
4 G4 H; y; a5 H
6 z6 `+ X$ C2 l6 QSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

# j: b( p1 [5 B: ?+ x/ w
Thanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.

6 t  S& {- z' p2 L" D8 x3 t# m* S1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".

2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.

月光宝盒

红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民，但很喜气！很有乐在其中的意境啊！

FCUK

thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
0 D# k& Z; Q3 ]) n. u0 H
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

五月

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
( u# q  y% X* R+ v5 P& V' zthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
5 S0 i" j% H$ c
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

' E, J6 {6 `; v% m9 F  z
诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.

Dawson

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
' ~/ N: d  X2 C- b3 jthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

6 f& n- L7 Q5 ~% v8 RShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

有啊，有很多经典的例子。
/ S8 |+ y) {  R0 Z4 ]/ Z5 F
比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》
% V3 \" M* Z0 r9 U  E( {
Don't weep at my grave
For I am not there,
I've a date with a butterfly
To dance on the air.
2 ^* p3 D  g. J# P# ]0 R5 |8 f  BIf I'm missed, find a flower,
, ?# ~3 S5 Y4 ?" j9 HI'll be there too,
0 @6 M( _1 l# g# x3 g% S  B, u( TSniffing it's fragrance
) h0 x* s) q& [& x" N4 ?  {* W  X$ xRight next to you.

: l3 I& t2 A/ j' tDon't be sad
- e, }1 m8 q. M7 D* G5 A6 }3 CWhen you remember me,
4 n* o& U6 o" Z+ G$ |4 ~) Y( l; fFor I'm singing in the sunshine,
$ F% h! C7 @( a5 O, wWild and free,
Flirting with the lighting,
; J' z) b) Q4 LPlaying tag with the wind,
# M; b. _2 C! x# V/ M6 |! hChasing the thunder
Time and again,
- K  @' a# |% ?" X' s: USoaring with the eagle,
Swimming in the sea,
Enjoying all of nature
While I'm waiting for thee.