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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA4 v. P1 A& V) n% v
- B; B1 V0 Q0 |0 z1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
n/ j0 f! P; C8 P. B2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. 9 H6 e5 v$ c, ~* ^
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
9 C! j0 G5 B# `4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. 2 \3 R( X2 T2 O4 J8 }
5. Weed
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( O' \+ I; H6 ?TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA : U7 Q. h/ x( g
' k/ F1 ]) ^" \7 t' d l1. Big rock between you and B.C.
' U. S7 d5 n/ Q5 ]; D$ e' M% m' U2. Ottawa who?
: w9 I8 b9 a$ O5 ^; S3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
! f& H* _: f' \4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. / A3 |" ~2 a5 H- y+ j5 E# p
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
* L8 M6 ^- o# `5 B4 F F, G5 {6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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- E0 j) O6 b' y) }0 c% Z4 pTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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1. You never run out of wheat. 3 h1 }! I( I* Q( v
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
' f$ Z& S+ J; P- O* b) H9 N3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. 1 @- `, g# J6 [: k1 D* @! f
4. People will assume you live on a farm. 5 s/ h0 {+ B5 G7 K: x
" Q, W8 ]( T) K# ?' jTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA + F0 P. O8 H% s, \3 ]
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. 0 j: k9 Z# q# C8 K. \- Q2 c
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
5 n* _! G7 l; ~. S3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
9 K4 L& R5 I( d$ ~$ _0 K4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 1 J8 b; _; E T2 K6 ?
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe. Q2 Z0 S1 L' v! [* ~' g7 h
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. ! c3 e: k4 w' q( S
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. 2 R7 B+ ?( f8 W: A" x" P0 z
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. ) l1 a$ U! J6 Z( ^7 T, l
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7 q" Z- _0 m8 t; O; e/ {, S6 KTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable
* Y: Y; r: z4 b. I0 i: o) l9 H# O2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. 4 S% {8 k8 m3 g1 v) V
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. @& O1 I5 n) E; n0 k
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
4 o/ E& A; A) V8 KTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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5 a( }* P6 T9 {TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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6 Q& Y6 ?9 Z& L1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. + i& T7 H6 j6 `- ^$ _5 w
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
: R9 B" i2 z/ E B7 d3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
5 _( f0 f& x. h) u' \+ i {4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. : {* k8 @+ N a1 A3 U3 G
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' o4 b( k1 o8 ^TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA ( }2 z7 n! d2 `, d
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" a. K, I& ]9 `- L4 f: e1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
4 Q/ F+ Q( r9 q' Q8 Q0 G+ @2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
7 l1 F, d. y3 y+ D6 t3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. 3 p/ X9 d) ~- Z( w" |! m
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
]+ K2 n g: r) ]2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
) K8 B8 o" I& ]) \& u4 y7 ]3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
2 [* d: b$ n& Y& p3 b! p4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
/ S! @, Q8 q1 Y* i7 c( J% n5 c5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. 9 \& O! y. Z$ ~4 Y0 T
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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2 k5 H4 \8 E$ a/ R0 L- \TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND # w v( J' F# x- Q6 q) Y; j
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. G1 f5 W# o$ F; Q* ~# O/ z- m
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. 8 U: E& Q4 f1 t# z. v* @" C
3. The workday is about two hours long.
6 b# {+ c Z/ u: }5 m0 A4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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