埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 2894|回复: 16

送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA) J) d4 V0 I  b7 C/ ~
2 ]: v% h2 A) f% y3 b8 Y2 a7 y
. ^0 @" n# }7 E/ [7 W

+ ?* U! }- A/ A 1. Bring your own house.
2 H* Q$ R6 j( A% S! X& y+ f# |! b# o& ~4 v' C2 b) D
2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and- C# w4 o: f+ h/ k" M/ B
hospital.. L+ H' ^0 l& z( l
! T" l/ G5 D2 w; O' g
3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder
7 E5 y$ _% w0 B$ H3 }2 O$ ucapital of Canada .  z7 R$ j8 c9 T; Y
7 q! J& y7 e4 o! V4 ~
4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada ., M3 e) t; g9 k) U  ^3 H! f
+ {  y; v" w) Q
5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug% f  _' Z$ l7 N4 g8 s* _7 p1 r) R
capital of Canada .' K/ B( C% A, W0 T
5 a  R7 H" K/ o' z! m7 T1 r: X
6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is
/ B. Q2 G: G, L* |, j2 a( q$8.00/hour.
( y! @; O0 e( f/ C3 l* ?5 P3 d- A6 C* x2 B/ l" T
7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour./ I+ S1 M4 S2 K3 x' j4 u& Y

" L* E+ w7 v+ h0 t( G: P 8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money
/ U$ Z8 k/ l2 Bon a 15 year holiday ?
& W! Q5 F9 {  j4 e2 y5 [
5 b" V+ f: r/ w4 y" s+ L 9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas
. Z# o# ]( V% S! vprices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)  a' L/ l5 b1 P+ i5 j4 k
/ Z1 @: G% P* o) i: b% f7 i6 e
10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come2 d/ H0 x" M: i% g( x5 C: b
here sick.
" k0 `1 K' q! g. e2 m6 E. U
. j1 y7 e% _4 y/ h' f: q: l2 v11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12
" n( O$ }3 D: s3 M; l) Vyears ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone." N1 n$ ]9 r' U5 {1 P, x
6 f/ X* ^& I- h4 p3 g

* ~8 |$ ?4 v" S! g8 c, `) j5 r- C' Y3 T4 _" D% ~+ \
THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :* E, I1 F/ D* n0 Z

- ?) [* H! Q# N( ]9 r7 D; `4 [1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".9 k% \% V. [+ W6 \

1 P+ O* ?- [& }2 B1 u2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour, S1 Y/ P# N& p7 U: R, u( s; ?' m% V
is from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
7 X: t6 t( K. @+ z+ `
8 y' B2 L+ Q) v+ y9 v8 q9 G) n3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its4 ]8 z4 d' U; F1 {% [
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest# w; {0 T# R+ l  Q5 M% S1 z
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires2 _$ r/ `4 D' F
go second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell+ t& Q, s; ~1 s! t; I) k
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
' D1 b4 v4 s1 Q. q+ M+ \3 u4 ^* [! S2 N' J" h# `. T4 Z2 q# b
4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
* x/ c4 U* Z  p" qcussed out, and possibly shot.
. y' {9 q8 W0 q
& O1 e, g$ v" }0 G3 z5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that+ a$ m1 O9 e$ i% h" W0 y
can get you shot.. l9 M6 M* d( v2 i; Y

' w8 e4 V/ L7 J" }2 z7 y2 D- r& z6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour7 R( z6 E$ ~) b  C7 X. P+ F* \9 Z- K
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next* t6 V; l6 s: n2 V
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and" v7 B: T+ u/ }6 X$ r
more construction starts everyday./ b3 K+ V, T- K2 U2 R

) p5 j9 |- I8 [  B  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,9 l. L# p+ u' r8 P7 i* ~# {# e
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
: P4 i& [" e& q7 t* c' Zsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
3 o: P( h8 ?" V6 ?3 P& y6 f  O
8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all3 A2 y+ t9 M6 M  m+ K5 g/ R5 h
the same road.
/ N* }$ ]# c+ @$ F5 u
( R$ M2 f( `* g' O9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the( o! V* e! D: a
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally
" o% N3 v; B+ n+ ^: hactivated."% }) O8 A5 @4 O  q/ x
9 V( h8 r7 \; }. K
10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
3 B& r' y9 R$ d; Bzone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off": U& R- o8 ]* _* k
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
6 K/ A$ r: h4 y  ^7 |0 Z& s
3 A. r: ^" W" ^* g7 H11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur6 G9 v1 g* O, P6 \
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and8 e: Q# S# K- {- m) }1 T# x
blankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is; y% K3 p5 n0 Y; n
virtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层
. z+ ]9 b2 r0 D$ p  A  n  Z, ~3 w( }
有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(4348) 鸡蛋(18)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。9 d: g4 \$ C# U
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。% d/ M& W$ [2 K1 d* K* w
有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
鲜花(3) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 : $ f' d8 D/ v0 {8 t4 x
9 ?7 j" \" a$ F) B8 C  e
此地钱多, 人傻, 速来 * X2 a5 m* d1 u6 ^6 E! P$ i( q; `  v, I

% U9 g% s- t  S ; j1 [* a6 z2 N' H3 C

2 l% c. d$ E8 p8 z- x: S/ Q[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 4 j3 s5 T+ H% V/ L! Q( f
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
5 R6 ^4 d- H5 s满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
: O, f( n$ I4 Y ...
  J# U' P& i3 e% |  c

. _( x, C$ J: @# \ 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
鲜花(3) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表 - L4 G# V7 ^, b  j# K
& B4 _& x! B9 z" S

. R% R9 D2 ]+ p* y, K' g7 L 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
- L$ a2 t( |2 n8 }6 ]) y3 _9 Q

7 A/ F, [# A  a% _, p( J2 N: f这么刺痛你了吗?% ?  V# E1 Y8 F/ c' |
5 q$ F# b5 C2 [* ^
我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 / W, x% H# S4 b9 {! ]$ x
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
, e" C& v  F6 \6 @5 f满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。7 s8 R4 B6 ?/ ^9 _5 a9 P9 `
...

* F6 q& k% N  j8 Q你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。
$ @& Z' G# }1 ]. A( `2 h6 i, r. t. I1 R. W8 P5 l* j* o
再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks.
6 ?3 V& ^9 U) Z7 }5 k
, i$ O# A6 c/ W- u8 ~. Z7 k% t
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
鲜花(158) 鸡蛋(19)
发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-2-25 02:57 , Processed in 0.230976 second(s), 39 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表