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NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA9 X @: [5 W" O
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: {0 ?# G( G5 B9 W. A5 h# ` 1. Bring your own house.
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2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and
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5 I7 s u4 g% E2 i8 e 3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder1 P4 `0 w e o; u5 Y
capital of Canada .- [' [6 \1 K% n4 K# l) D; ~; K
/ M! c2 e) M8 Z# w8 C 4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .' D* H! G9 ^( v b$ j$ U: L
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5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug& V5 G1 M' ?. J. Q8 }. l
capital of Canada .1 E0 r$ }$ W1 M% ?' t4 P. c
/ ?) e; Q3 \! s$ [2 R$ o 6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is2 ]" k- Z3 U* Q+ ~) {
$8.00/hour.
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$ F( E: |* }, v+ {+ A; k2 D 7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.
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8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money) c9 T- m0 i6 O. t
on a 15 year holiday ?
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9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas# s& J# P+ Q8 N0 _+ y# r
prices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)
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10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come, K* _6 b' r$ C& M
here sick.
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11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12
5 b% o7 l5 Z0 S! F( M9 N, gyears ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.
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4 o; z+ C4 V! z9 C) g( b! J THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :( @2 _0 x9 j. c
9 k) z: |8 R4 o1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".6 K/ p- Z0 M: ^( P# b
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour
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. ^! x$ I$ g* y; R3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its0 ^3 ?3 X7 Q, I4 t: v+ ~
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest7 G3 l/ w0 D- ~ g% E8 y+ B
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires8 }: U0 u% K6 K* A4 \* B
go second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell' K9 q' c8 ^- W: N8 S& y* t# _, O
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
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5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that7 e! D8 A6 D- {# H) G/ F2 ~1 v
can get you shot.
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c, U' ^) P% Q) ]* F1 i+ k6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour; b+ L' B; a$ L9 \
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
1 h5 U4 Z0 {: y" W0 w* A% dday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and8 ~1 |' Y1 A% K8 u. U" v; L! u3 b- [
more construction starts everyday.3 l2 B \% M- I; _$ U7 G
$ U% v& q3 u* ^- m' Y' h, H 7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
1 `- E: D9 ~6 q8 e$ Wdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
x0 z7 E( z; i2 @squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all6 Z C. F9 T0 P
the same road.
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9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
1 ]3 l0 L1 h2 K" W" ]shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally
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9 ?+ t0 r) @( l3 X+ Q/ R10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
: @, O& |0 I, O* \5 K7 jzone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off"+ u+ e, P6 X. l9 n9 G3 O
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.% G+ d5 R( s4 P) e
+ ?3 T1 v! v% d" n Y, N3 D2 g& V11 . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
}" \. x3 {; ~5 s; |( llined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
9 {( i5 ~ s8 {8 w; u4 ?9 ~blankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is
; Z3 u3 ~3 Y g! [# [. svirtually non-existent until the spring thaw. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2007-10-11 19:09
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:51
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