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送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

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发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA9 X  @: [5 W" O

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: {0 ?# G( G5 B9 W. A5 h# ` 1. Bring your own house.
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2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and
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5 I7 s  u4 g% E2 i8 e 3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder1 P4 `0 w  e  o; u5 Y
capital of Canada .- [' [6 \1 K% n4 K# l) D; ~; K

/ M! c2 e) M8 Z# w8 C 4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .' D* H! G9 ^( v  b$ j$ U: L
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5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug& V5 G1 M' ?. J. Q8 }. l
capital of Canada .1 E0 r$ }$ W1 M% ?' t4 P. c

/ ?) e; Q3 \! s$ [2 R$ o 6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is2 ]" k- Z3 U* Q+ ~) {
$8.00/hour.
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$ F( E: |* }, v+ {+ A; k2 D 7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.
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8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money) c9 T- m0 i6 O. t
on a 15 year holiday ?
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9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas# s& J# P+ Q8 N0 _+ y# r
prices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)
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10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come, K* _6 b' r$ C& M
here sick.
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11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12
5 b% o7 l5 Z0 S! F( M9 N, gyears ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.
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4 o; z+ C4 V! z9 C) g( b! J THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :( @2 _0 x9 j. c

9 k) z: |8 R4 o1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".6 K/ p- Z0 M: ^( P# b
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour
! w6 V% M, z1 o$ a1 i- ]8 }6 }7 \is from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
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. ^! x$ I$ g* y; R3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its0 ^3 ?3 X7 Q, I4 t: v+ ~
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest7 G3 l/ w0 D- ~  g% E8 y+ B
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires8 }: U0 u% K6 K* A4 \* B
go second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell' K9 q' c8 ^- W: N8 S& y* t# _, O
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
( g8 h- B8 P& v7 C4 s1 V% v, Fcussed out, and possibly shot.3 E% B( A  H4 d! h
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5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that7 e! D8 A6 D- {# H) G/ F2 ~1 v
can get you shot.
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  c, U' ^) P% Q) ]* F1 i+ k6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour; b+ L' B; a$ L9 \
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
1 h5 U4 Z0 {: y" W0 w* A% dday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and8 ~1 |' Y1 A% K8 u. U" v; L! u3 b- [
more construction starts everyday.3 l2 B  \% M- I; _$ U7 G

$ U% v& q3 u* ^- m' Y' h, H  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
1 `- E: D9 ~6 q8 e$ Wdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
  x0 z7 E( z; i2 @squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all6 Z  C. F9 T0 P
the same road.
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9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
1 ]3 l0 L1 h2 K" W" ]shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally
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9 ?+ t0 r) @( l3 X+ Q/ R10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
: @, O& |0 I, O* \5 K7 jzone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off"+ u+ e, P6 X. l9 n9 G3 O
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.% G+ d5 R( s4 P) e

+ ?3 T1 v! v% d" n  Y, N3 D2 g& V11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
  }" \. x3 {; ~5 s; |( llined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
9 {( i5 ~  s8 {8 w; u4 ?9 ~blankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is
; Z3 u3 ~3 Y  g! [# [. svirtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层

9 w& g* q8 j0 A有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。. V) B  E8 o( l  q
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。; X. S) X+ t& X7 W
有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 : 8 V+ y; n  g+ G4 B( c4 K

9 H5 l6 G: q' S此地钱多, 人傻, 速来
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4 `1 i, O  {: A" ~$ Z/ _; q! `[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表
2 o. ]3 @9 i+ P5 G! t9 i朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
, [3 F! x! Z/ `4 L) j) W满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。3 {' j. q! q/ j$ L% n- A
...

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说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表
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说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。

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4 U6 o9 D. C/ p. h这么刺痛你了吗?
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我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
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发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表
9 y9 x* Z! d& R朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。' v) `2 Y( o* g% U: U: o
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。* P+ K2 y/ O' J/ O
...
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你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。
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再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
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发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
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发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks./ Z) J% h) E: [
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发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
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发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
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