埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 2839|回复: 16

送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA' |5 d. @7 U: K1 A' |+ ~
. t1 r+ A0 l. m
& n0 [, U/ [: K. ^" }4 @
6 H* L3 U1 Q# g/ o6 f
1. Bring your own house.6 K. e% z  V9 v# v3 {
% `" A! N" R! f
2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and0 Q  Y: M8 g% A6 P
hospital.
& n  [% K5 D" L7 _/ j
5 [0 g0 V. d$ s1 I2 F0 v2 ` 3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder
4 i& a5 B8 q$ P+ {) icapital of Canada .+ O  w- d2 [9 S4 c8 P2 ^' a
' g  }$ d5 f7 d- T+ Z2 B
4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .& b0 M: V6 d. p( X) ^7 g
$ a, e0 p# M* S9 l, z/ L
5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug$ k6 a  I  [0 y) O& b9 B) d
capital of Canada .2 ]/ V' K! p, |: n+ F

. V* _0 b+ ^  z$ j0 a3 f' E3 ~9 C# r 6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is) l7 ^7 x. q: Z' z+ C* R
$8.00/hour.
. G* J" V- F' E' O; u# l4 |# X: N! w* s
7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.
& i3 W7 K8 d+ y# e& F7 J
& i8 {$ f$ ]2 K: I; M* a7 x! \ 8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money, O. F8 P" d3 W; y
on a 15 year holiday ?
; f$ Q' C7 n6 u: n) @1 q% D" v
9 n1 Q1 N$ G3 e& l 9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas
4 ~; a6 ]  S2 j4 H$ ^& M4 l/ Fprices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)2 y7 o% Q3 G% w5 d% d$ r
  G8 m8 W/ s* |* N7 }) _8 h4 q4 L
10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come! E6 `4 c. W- ?) u
here sick.
* l0 A& `4 v6 |' Z& v3 N. E4 A
& f3 Z) p. \; K$ h3 b/ H! H  |11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12# L7 n7 ~3 E* l- s2 q& [
years ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.$ E7 c9 H1 ]- O1 j  f7 Y# h/ p
# B! ^+ C; v: j4 b9 B
, J# N% x8 q- H. e

* z7 p$ j$ [9 Y! K THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :
2 h( V. [0 Q- Z8 r
2 s/ V) [. I) F. R% v; ?" C1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".
; q% T8 [0 {+ o3 H' l6 D* I7 C7 ]) V% H- v. R+ @! ^4 k! f" k
2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour
7 Y6 v" W$ k& C0 V; x& x' kis from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
$ q& L$ m9 @( t0 k! p  W  i2 K; I6 I9 C) D
3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its% D: ~. x$ I% y( p2 m: D1 R
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest/ I; G  G) W& j8 H! _/ e# P1 I3 N
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
6 j( O6 t, B. L; Ngo second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell
) I7 y" O4 F' m0 Dphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
, i" h* T; |, l. P6 G/ N
: F/ t7 i1 W  z' m4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,. h! g4 U& {/ ^! b; d  I
cussed out, and possibly shot.
3 I; O* y2 i$ }2 N9 e/ G: w% x/ c- Y# f
5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that; n3 I; J! T6 j. D& b$ @% y8 j, j
can get you shot.
  F+ P+ P/ n: W- F& B' Y  Z; {% k) `9 ?2 }1 B. r
6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour
. |8 H9 d' U3 C+ @" R3 _) @  Dbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
3 a; v$ p3 e& w/ b" }( z0 P2 vday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and9 s2 W# \+ \5 K5 R
more construction starts everyday.' g" l+ S0 v; w- |! ^

: j& I% t* k8 a% S  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
6 R' c6 v' U, z9 R( F9 Kdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
2 O& U' y7 N3 d. q/ lsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.4 S4 W; f3 V& F

* Y5 ]. Y4 \; C/ X8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all% D  X9 D, p+ o! v' |- E- K
the same road.% z- R/ ?8 r% E0 c3 R3 |

% g8 @. ?9 U+ c9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
; [6 r7 r: @1 Ashoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally
/ @( a$ _, q0 ~; j) e7 ?activated."4 o5 Z# t8 R/ ?2 q- @

$ m  b% s. u; }8 W- f8 t( k10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
1 v" u1 B0 R) ezone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off"
( E1 y7 w9 x# raccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
1 @" `4 |. _* }/ r5 e+ W( G; O! ~4 C2 Y% `: g% c" G: l
11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
& U" z: b( s5 {0 w  zlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and( \# h- v, q/ L
blankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is
  \3 O& t; [, cvirtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层
! N6 L! e, X6 z, _+ g; _6 d
有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(4348) 鸡蛋(18)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。/ `3 W0 f; j  T2 l
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
% w) ^# ]' M) g) ]2 A1 E# [' ^有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
鲜花(3) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 :
# _+ d, h7 p6 T6 b) |
5 R, d/ n8 \6 r7 @5 x' J此地钱多, 人傻, 速来 # U+ ^# A$ e# g- ]1 x

; J% ~9 e: G) q4 N& d6 R' [! w0 C
0 d8 M* r' U" E& ]; E
5 `+ t4 P7 X$ n7 b) t% N3 `[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表
& g" A  E6 s$ W# Y! D' Y# j5 s朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
8 c) u2 r, ~8 m; n满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
& b$ o5 q4 `# v0 e3 |8 t; j ...

7 z% l' i" H: m  \" v8 p- b
# t4 x9 s1 Z2 E! l 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(3) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表 ( c6 _- w/ o  s$ s+ ]

. z8 _/ r0 ^3 s4 x" S% o
! ]5 A8 D1 `' F: g 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
3 n+ K. [6 _2 k6 `  I

7 z! a8 |/ ^$ [$ p4 m& P这么刺痛你了吗?0 Z# x) ]2 V4 r" p+ d2 b/ p) G; y
2 ]& b, A5 _0 h. F' F- Y9 [
我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 ; Z& z, Q: s6 i$ f  {( l
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
* _/ p) [0 j! \3 i2 j" Y. Q满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
( G# W* x. Z3 f& Z& q" @$ v5 N4 E7 b) q  j ...

' {$ t+ n" b; I' |' W% y. N你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。
4 C/ E* b& k" K4 A, g5 _& w1 ~6 w5 H5 j/ F7 Q5 q4 M: W; q% N- b
再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks.- ]: d  P; ?7 M+ Q) e9 I6 j
5 v# {8 t" r; P
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
鲜花(158) 鸡蛋(19)
发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-2-2 08:24 , Processed in 0.147410 second(s), 38 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表