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送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

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发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA
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. d& T3 W1 l. Z$ ?; d 1. Bring your own house.
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2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and
8 M3 c* W: ~5 v1 K1 \) L" h$ b9 Bhospital.  O' a: i; [! ~8 ^$ v' S

! A7 W" m* ]4 ?# | 3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder& F- T, s1 s9 W5 ~' S
capital of Canada .+ Y  [+ {* D% h' L6 L8 ^

, Z+ d) B+ j7 C  ?& U 4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .- B& C3 B9 L% @- b
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5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug
+ }; R0 E- Z/ s" G' v9 }capital of Canada .8 l5 Y7 f; d4 _$ P4 Y6 r0 ^
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6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is1 v" A2 I5 A; X& J/ x
$8.00/hour.
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7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.2 i! \" `* y1 ]/ J, X
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8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money
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2 V2 d/ b3 S6 H( x2 x 9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas
2 k/ V4 J5 Z9 lprices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)
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10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come4 t3 p, C* M' O7 k
here sick.0 D* {) m, [; B# v2 b/ f- a
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11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12
5 I8 g0 ~4 h# d5 D& n* E. Syears ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.: e+ c( q5 e' L

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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".
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; o3 \/ A9 {. ^2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour
. T$ A) I6 U* q" Y9 k$ ~3 Pis from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
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3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its7 w( e: I0 K# i. R4 @: g1 u
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
2 w9 Z" h6 D2 W9 s/ H/ {muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires: R& J; T0 v5 i* g% I" i* P/ j
go second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell+ [; I- |9 R5 [" K. l
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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! f2 z  V, K! g' a. E4 P4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,1 z3 V2 D, d9 A# A1 D
cussed out, and possibly shot.3 X: I, `* R, ^8 E& I4 ]8 n

4 b  d: Q" @; E; n$ f) F5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that
# o1 F3 N2 v1 ycan get you shot.
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6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour
. V0 ^; ^3 f+ a5 _& Ebarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
3 {9 t2 b1 o3 H- Q3 \- V, a( jday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
+ l1 Q. a! j1 H3 u/ R) hmore construction starts everyday.0 j& N& s0 n% y  X0 x

" d# @2 ~6 [. K3 r7 w  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
6 k, b1 n. E  ?8 }7 U# m9 B( {* ]deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,7 r; j' B* S0 F( w" e
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all& g7 Q* D, r# ?
the same road.. }# X( P" I! ~9 _9 D" |) @
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9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
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activated."9 ~. W" v1 {7 q: P& ]
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10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
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accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.7 S6 c- j5 l) C( B# s

6 i; b! e( ]: f5 ]$ X. U11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur, z' Y1 ?" P% V
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
7 s$ D% B' r5 |& K  X# ublankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is5 y* a# x- |8 n. K4 }$ T% h
virtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层
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有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
2 N- O0 j5 H" I5 }  \满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。3 }/ E, p3 B2 n! P+ }! i& g
有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 : ( k. @' y' d# C" d2 ?

! j- X% s# ~$ p7 @) r: H( w' C此地钱多, 人傻, 速来
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; d5 X5 z: }0 W6 n[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 3 a4 b7 x/ y( j, u
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
+ V  D+ A# R# U6 [满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
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  T' h+ ^0 K, q, V9 Z# p& O/ e$ ^ 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表 7 Z$ j" E+ C" L

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$ ]+ n8 i3 a( o7 a# N: w& D; g 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。

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这么刺痛你了吗?
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6 r" ~8 B% X' w( s0 i' u0 K我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 " A2 u  T& E4 }, a2 [* W2 d
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。/ B- T6 H: l# l8 E% L
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
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你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。7 H; V( z( b, g

7 O/ U9 k! h9 X. w1 u8 W再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
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发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
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发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks.
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发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
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发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
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