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送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

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发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA
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  }3 M, W6 }+ u 1. Bring your own house.# C8 h9 u+ p% g: Q7 D
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2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and+ I) ]  {) g) y8 G, d( X
hospital.
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3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder
; _9 z( E2 ]& `& V+ _1 {9 ucapital of Canada .9 T! z6 a0 ?3 {9 t$ l- H
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4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada ." v% P9 s7 L1 e8 v! v( K! U- s5 K6 A

& V! k- I7 w. y, f: I2 V 5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug$ G4 M; \9 f  S- Z2 G( `
capital of Canada .
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6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is; u7 E, M# b8 a+ y1 t2 B
$8.00/hour.
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, j4 h) e" u, [5 h, P4 R& d1 N 7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.3 |, h/ r( N$ Q1 v% B* y- x" D; S

8 i$ `- G& [0 I5 {3 I7 J  v& j 8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money: q  D; z( W& P/ o# U. ~7 s& {1 u
on a 15 year holiday ?
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2 F$ {5 F" u: j' o( ? 9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas" {5 e& }4 x( \9 q2 R7 O1 y
prices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)
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10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come$ p4 }' f9 b& Q/ Q9 I$ m
here sick.7 F: M7 t3 u) L2 |! h

) g4 ?; J7 ~; j% X11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12( m5 V3 i) ^" ^
years ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.
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' q$ t) C2 P( W THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :
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$ z1 a0 o1 Z7 Q3 c# Z1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour
8 |# Q- Q# g" Ais from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
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3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
# h9 Q) ^; `+ a3 Gown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
# j+ @. q6 X5 W1 p( Zmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
$ V0 {/ H- R; mgo second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell
  \( l# X4 w5 g  M- E1 Hphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.! t' u5 o. O) B* p& j
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4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
* M& b$ L3 {" o' \5 }* gcussed out, and possibly shot.
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5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that3 v+ \3 X3 Y6 p7 u
can get you shot.7 [; h6 W# l" H) M( e- q

! a+ m9 u2 i$ u1 E: T6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour9 h' u4 E  N4 K5 v  `
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
. }3 b1 z$ A( d8 `% eday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and  Y2 D8 V7 W+ W( n) l
more construction starts everyday.  x1 ~1 M& g: v0 K7 i8 Y1 t. c# n

: e0 I" r1 T7 B$ l  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
" f& V  W/ Y, {/ P" P. L7 x2 mdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
: W! [( F. T( psquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.) y1 N/ H9 I! B
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8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all
0 N2 Z! y+ ^( o& U8 j+ ?7 zthe same road.
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" p' p# T" S' B9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the1 \$ \$ C. b! w# ~4 Q
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally& |5 ~& J' Z  R" b8 f6 [
activated.") ?3 H" @2 N7 o4 b
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10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
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accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur% ^+ s3 Z2 r& c" `" v/ d
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
- G0 w$ o7 x' ], I3 A0 a  e' S. K+ Eblankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is
; U& R% A6 T, ]$ P) V; Zvirtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层
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有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。5 x, P/ Z9 N7 ^2 q2 u
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
* Z2 `  W/ c& n. N0 |5 e有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 :
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  Q" x' I# T; F" Q" y此地钱多, 人傻, 速来
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: _! Z/ P+ h0 w/ M/ u' L( T2 r[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 ' j" Y1 `! i5 \+ v+ @
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。1 \) s) ^  i! q1 @
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。: w7 _# U. W1 H4 W% P
...

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说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表 ; ?% k+ ]- _; F" O

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说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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  m# l3 x8 c  C9 t" Q# G5 D这么刺痛你了吗?
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7 a" M) _6 i5 L: G我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
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发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表
4 Y. [+ t, p5 C/ C+ r. k朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。$ u5 p. c% L9 C& H
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
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你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。
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1 ^0 H" S0 m8 H% z2 M. i! c% Z再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
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发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
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发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks.7 G, b( H* h( O. O! U1 p
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发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
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发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
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