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送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

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发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA
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6 C8 [9 f1 X0 H8 } 1. Bring your own house.
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2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and
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( q# I% W' ]. b# I9 p1 m# Q! p  L& p 3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder
4 i" _6 g5 U; S  [) ucapital of Canada .6 H, [' e* A$ F, _) s

' g9 |0 j0 o3 A- G 4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .8 k! N4 o# k6 u& x- |5 p# \

/ U0 f& m# O8 f2 q+ _ 5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug6 z; D" R' x9 u. s. U6 f1 G( f$ P' ]$ M
capital of Canada .
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- y: ~7 d+ g! V$ p, w 6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is- Z' D8 M6 N; E0 [! F
$8.00/hour.$ u/ g  G8 {& {" D( e6 x; `

6 [7 I% ?" N4 r- }" W$ } 7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.# i$ N4 }- J7 G0 V4 e
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8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money
+ F$ v* F2 o2 L& n( c) W; zon a 15 year holiday ?
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7 c+ h' k- x0 K3 G9 D/ W 9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas' l- G9 K* v) M1 X/ ~
prices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)
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9 |0 W% T4 {7 O( l5 i; ^) ]/ r+ j10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come, k* F0 {0 a' |) }
here sick.  u8 q4 C$ C- S9 p+ q6 C) x& B

2 R8 o# Y, F2 ?; M11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12, ?) a: o2 C* p2 R4 s
years ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.7 B8 i1 }0 e  R4 _# {
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$ G$ q1 N8 g1 f( N# _* v' b; b5 e! n8 { THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".- n3 Q- [" v! h9 z, @, R: u
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour
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3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its5 t/ a! i  ^+ L( `# h9 W# \
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
. Y" E' p( y/ w8 ~6 |* y$ umuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires, F4 e9 V& Z( L9 D  h
go second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell
/ [0 D9 f7 }& N5 Q- l. R' ?phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,9 }8 w: g% X+ r+ _- D! O
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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; V; g0 g3 h, }0 o# l% `5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that; p- Q, C$ k9 K; Z9 O3 W
can get you shot.
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3 s* p2 i$ s6 `3 j7 T' L6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour
& q: ]. n1 Z: V( X+ W- U9 q+ Kbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next4 Z/ H* U5 ?9 ~5 G
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and5 c) w! s$ U8 ^* n
more construction starts everyday.
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+ `( I. L4 ?( ]+ I8 b  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
  b* K( c+ H: P2 y! P1 i" K; ?! v! kdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
- N! \, A" |' D- L8 `  bsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.% w  ?, [; a4 X9 f" f7 n9 E, [

2 J9 ], e5 v8 c/ o8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all
, g, r) x$ V& v4 Jthe same road.
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- q* y2 b: `' H) `/ s+ y! d0 u9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
+ a1 B2 R+ D9 b; Z1 d$ ~0 I/ rshoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally; I7 _3 b: d6 U
activated."  p2 [: Q$ g3 _9 d. r" s
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10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km& j" T' D7 k0 R- g; t
zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off"
! b: G! J. P  s4 V, X& _" @! caccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur: w& [$ S: \* ^: o; @, L
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
0 u3 J2 q! f3 R, e3 _' xblankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is5 S; E3 g  ?0 h1 F  M' j7 `
virtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层
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有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
' I6 T0 r: q0 ]0 M满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
! w+ u! }$ @6 Q- H5 s' r有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 : $ E3 B1 n' M& v; W2 X7 i7 M# X/ ~

- k& I& Q: t+ e* c) j此地钱多, 人傻, 速来
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[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表
: O) K8 v: n6 I3 |! G) b朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。+ K. o# D5 h1 d) c$ N7 F+ m
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
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8 C2 D2 z9 \2 G# r8 h1 c 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表 9 U$ O; y- W. l% T+ N3 I% V! g% b

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2 j0 F2 I, c% a- M6 @- ~6 c! l 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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这么刺痛你了吗?# s/ Q$ k+ g! F. U  t& ^3 d

4 V2 c9 z& b6 U2 M# ~' |) t我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
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发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 7 P+ t& M2 h) i/ I
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。8 i4 u6 j! D5 y2 u; B
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。5 B) ]! y# p: \8 f
...
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你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。+ v) V: f6 r% d- w" k! ]" p

: b+ q: L' ~8 g9 [: n! f再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
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发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
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发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks.
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发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
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发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
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