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送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

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发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA
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1. Bring your own house.
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* ~, F: [2 F9 y' {# S9 } 2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and
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2 b+ J; H+ ?) q/ w, T0 s 3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder- g; a5 B* T( w3 X$ |( r
capital of Canada .
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4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .
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5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug) \) L3 A1 W* W' E
capital of Canada .
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6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is& R! s2 _& R" q  k0 \
$8.00/hour.
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: L9 R2 Z0 S. W) d' u 7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.4 d3 w9 S2 h. }: \

7 P  X* p4 Y+ c' D+ D8 ? 8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money, L, ^$ A- W- m$ m1 z0 s! `
on a 15 year holiday ?* u9 [0 y! k/ a1 t" x

" J" Z! d; s" r' [$ B5 d 9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas2 O6 ]/ |  Q9 k; N
prices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)
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10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come! d* Z+ ~4 x: f! D# t! b
here sick.3 }( g2 {+ t" i8 Y# o

* n# k  I! X/ M1 T11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 12
5 {. s; i+ H; Z) G3 j- gyears ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.. \, e: I, s6 v' O6 g
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8 P; u7 o+ b0 D$ b THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :, c2 b( O& D, Y4 `

: r9 x( \/ l% Q1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour- n: b5 {/ J7 A/ X2 ?; a# ^% Y
is from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
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3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its* N% M) P) E$ f3 O0 P! I
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
  ~7 A# x% U( L$ Y1 I+ w3 C' ?muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires0 |/ Q2 i9 h/ ]
go second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell
: ?% s- X9 V4 Y9 e' Kphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,6 q1 M; d8 y; H# O2 b4 i( z/ \
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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! ?1 w4 @- s/ k5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that
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1 m2 T: `9 f4 U/ T) `5 x: l4 P6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour  A: F2 ?/ i. A( O: O
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next) \4 Q, f, D7 {, A* @
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and3 o' j/ h7 _+ V/ j
more construction starts everyday.7 u! y* z' E. D4 _8 n  D( ^
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  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
( V8 g6 c9 r/ jdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
' g9 n* C4 ?' z! C- K' Dsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.6 I+ w" W1 @; V6 H5 v/ [# Z
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8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all) q% N1 p- U% d+ c* T, E
the same road.
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  E1 p$ e3 `! l1 @0 i9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the  R$ m6 n' O  m5 B0 q" D5 G- s
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally
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10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
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accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
) ?& _  `6 \8 j4 ?7 j* d4 u& I6 |9 ^lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
7 p0 i( ~3 q: n- {7 i4 kblankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is7 Z1 W$ {5 j4 ]
virtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层
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有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。7 b+ ~% ^! r' m6 _- a
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
2 N- C0 T" J! u2 A" |有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 : 7 K! R( D9 r" l& {1 P: g
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此地钱多, 人傻, 速来
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[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表
( v2 a0 }0 J  t1 _朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
$ `+ k4 D, f. p! W% P1 B0 L- ~1 ~" L满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。5 d' s7 S  t  J' {
...
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说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表
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说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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3 }3 W& F) f8 p- v: _1 n这么刺痛你了吗?
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* y9 |7 ~+ u# E* P我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
大型搬家
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发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 / v/ n6 E& w7 P2 ?" }$ b5 p
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。" [  W  J3 u/ f0 s! j
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
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你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。
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再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
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发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
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发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks.
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发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
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