 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
) c# U3 g; U& G+ _. J/ \2. Mostly to clean the house.
6 I( y$ s3 ^- D% K6 r1 R1 H3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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How did God make mothers? + Z# M& j. n r0 W' a! f/ B2 S
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
! c! `+ q( L7 S2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. M) D9 |% v7 ?: x+ {" _9 s8 V
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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) [0 i; ?' X' ?What ingredients are mothers made of ? & p) T5 R. j" ]6 K1 q% z. z) `6 w. w
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
/ C5 A `* }) N, b" T2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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# S- v, ~) Q9 f- q9 wWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
! a I P: L7 g7 t$ x* n) f1. We're related.
% e1 C- X" ]1 t5 q0 m6 v2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 3 ]3 T' b. k6 G
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
/ c; i( m, q# Q, b, |1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
, c7 }9 k: I0 c- ]+ {8 ]4 ^2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. & j5 O0 c# d1 _- E
3. They say she used to be nice. ' D; D! x* j+ S5 |
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? 5 u7 Y% n" l) [! |
1. His last name.* Z9 X0 ~% |8 a9 ^0 |
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
9 C3 P/ ~5 I/ [) S3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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% G6 _0 d7 d& |; q) S! g; SWhy did your mom marry your dad? , W* P* d/ ~: p! p/ }
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. . f% [4 V0 I3 O4 ~4 q& v" \
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. , [5 ], F1 J. v, t
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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( d3 g# e1 Y' w+ D- aWho's the boss at your house? : O1 M( v+ m" N' S$ |4 w
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. : T4 R! r5 _: h5 z1 J
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed." C, J1 L% X0 ?, f+ A
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
R l4 V7 w* B. J1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. " } M2 i+ w3 G3 k
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
1 y% o" I* @! v' R+ Y8 j3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 5 R5 G- g* O% H2 `/ O4 P
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
; q) ^8 D3 z, n& I7 b1. Mothers don't do spare time.
+ _+ m! x. ~% x% ]+ P9 }2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
5 W4 _" j7 e/ i1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.$ ?. X7 H+ X- x% g
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 8 R# R, i3 q5 Q: _1 g
6 D2 a9 t) o- @6 m( B$ L2 lIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 9 T" A* W* I: z0 d0 }! i
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. / M' W) h. S: i9 {+ b) q
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
6 f6 b6 o! i4 U; R3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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