 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 3 E1 R! g j. i8 s- K
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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6 }1 S6 j+ q9 a6 GWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. % [! V f$ N' D! p
: Y. _. l1 a' p! w" u- d5 ]If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
/ {: ^- ?7 Y5 @. ?8 [* Q4 }- fmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.$ z8 e, Y4 I6 m$ _7 E
* G% b! b' Q4 B* yGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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2 \' C" L1 o6 F- l, f0 G! R0 ^Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..; X+ t# v! Q: u
; u) `4 r% }8 D5 v6 P8 ~1 tWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 3 }; ?( Y \' _9 c' E8 P( G
! O& G1 {" V% P$ c' xWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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9 I( Y5 E+ P' |' S6 FRinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.7 o: ]: F4 L* v1 v; k2 A
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. Q' T, x3 `9 F" P5 A% [
) }, ~7 U1 S" \, Y C( c! g# ZGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 9 t) B' K% x. B$ z' E/ P6 {
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. * I0 L9 @: c O
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. ; S; c+ h5 E+ c
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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6 A+ o0 s6 I9 c% }- v- P7 V# WHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: ; a' x9 F. f8 t
0 S/ k4 U2 V4 o8 RTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 3 r! i# {$ U. b6 y6 r# f3 y. Z* m: y
2 ^3 k. [# a4 ]$ vWalk naked to the bathroom.
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& g0 C2 f3 P- Y* _. ]- [If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 8 N: r$ }6 F$ }; J. @! s
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. : P; T. i7 P. ~; Z
( g" b6 x2 K' C1 H. bAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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* e" g9 [5 i% T5 AGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 0 t d# f' e* {$ Y& Y# C! |
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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H V! {3 F. i& @6 YFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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8 B2 r7 z7 w }: x* O. x* C9 R' fSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. % K$ e! s; [" n3 q
2 N2 x7 e" ` K: |/ H0 P! R; nWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. , K9 a3 K' ^0 o
" l" \1 @. {9 e& K% \+ q) H) \Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.! y$ B0 m' Y! d7 b0 q
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 6 U" C8 V1 j/ S% G
; y3 ^- t9 U& {2 lAdmire wiener size in mirror again. " l" V' w% w9 R' ?9 O
& p1 J' d+ l! {& C0 l, jLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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7 d7 C& I! d5 A q: i( MThrow wet towel on bed.
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! `; G) E* S5 pIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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