 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.4 w5 W) l! c1 h+ c. n& T9 U$ [( r W
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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r- M" a* l0 P! _If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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. I9 g `. @+ N: N: F5 YLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- , M9 c Y% d* J
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc., H- ~+ @ J" v# e; _
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. $ {% P& E- x* E7 p1 z; c( f
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.0 e7 E1 F+ l& m; v
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 5 ]# E" w% K: z' F! u5 J
1 i! ]4 D5 D/ mRinse conditioner off hair. K# H7 j% r( P! h+ p' M+ W) ]
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Shave armpits and legs.& T8 K' c1 L' D$ i/ ~
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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" E/ D& }- r2 a1 W( dSpray mold spots with Tilex. / C7 Q7 u- o d; t2 _5 ~
+ w$ K) q' s- _- \* i. AGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. # U+ `9 Y. e6 g3 i$ W
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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% b1 E% b" `0 g6 b9 B, g6 ~Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 2 q3 D! d. H# f+ }/ ~& C9 X# Q8 x
& |. s% s( T1 `& A% HWalk naked to the bathroom.- P' Y/ j9 C N2 I& v; t+ S
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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w) E" w" \% k4 B( h( G* s0 oLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 6 g1 {" X" c1 R; b. {
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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9 Y6 w8 N, {0 P0 J) n4 G. r FGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. : U" e# C% }3 v d R# {$ b/ W
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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! d# w8 g" l2 V' N6 H/ _ JFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 3 w! d( c( P s) \
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 9 A7 s* d4 m0 n
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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$ K# K7 I0 D( Z' I) r @1 P' d% nWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. + Y# W! |" F6 G0 s& M! h9 ?* X4 i' V
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% a- s7 b% I& u w7 ^# SRinse off and get out of shower. 5 p, g* _2 O( q& T
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Partially dry off.7 \+ w7 M( v/ G8 t2 P) [
( N3 i6 m# D/ j' F: jFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. ; o) x6 \2 W8 M: K$ w3 G
. q9 L2 J3 h4 [- ^Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. # i3 d; Z6 V s
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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- u1 k6 c* J: v7 vThrow wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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