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weekend happyness

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发表于 2008-8-22 20:40 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new 1 l9 h! x+ m' K
BMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a
! g9 L- P( |5 MBroni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window
* e; O5 C* E6 g$ Z! M, zand asked the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your 5 G  k5 c- O- l: n. m$ U' `9 ^; c3 H
flock, will you give me one?"
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The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his 3 v1 J. f8 a% p2 {9 n  M
peacefully-grazing flock and calmly answered, "Sure."
2 x5 u4 C; W7 C
2 U% ^. g7 G0 w; N3 R6 v/ H# sThe yuppie parked his car, whipped out his IBM ThinkPad and connected it to a
: I4 E9 W/ G" l* [cell phone, then he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where he called up a 3 I9 k+ e( _. w0 b
GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then opened up a database
7 \3 O! h; I8 D% `/ zand an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He sent an email on his
0 _) m, m9 t0 n( ABlackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response. Finally, he prints out % @) @( A/ H: f( l' ~
a 130 page report on his miniaturized printer then turns to the shepherd and
2 ~' j/ w5 K, E7 e  ~* [/ d4 Qsays,"You have exactly 1586 sheep".3 T( }" ~8 o8 W+ L. ]' G5 j( b
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"That is correct; take one of the sheep" said the shepherd. 2 m( q  r2 x) y% v! ], Q

: Y# t0 i+ [. B2 N: }He watches the young man select one of the animals and bundle it into his 5 D( r0 z5 E5 A% A# {( _. o
car.
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0 p4 [5 c2 o. O3 d( h! I  sThen the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business ; X3 k' U- S- E2 F; T
is, will you give me back my animal?"
$ n) r+ |* Q- d, r* m9 L
- p6 ~# Q. @* O3 f& E"OK, why not" answered the young man.4 `6 |" \. t1 `9 v- D+ X* l

) z8 Z" g; g' G; @0 T+ E6 x"Clearly, you are a consultant" said the shepherd. 3 @( M6 k) Q8 s' {: x

  q1 |0 l, c  w' ?# e7 h"That's correct" says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"! L* C' G: Z3 z* j% t: d) o
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"No guessing required" answers the shepherd. "You turned up here although 9 G! D2 m8 m6 ]7 r, t
nobody called you. You want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a 8 `2 Y! e5 d$ P
question I never asked, and you don't know crap about my business.... Now give 0 f# o, C# q8 h3 S( E1 U. F
me back my dog".
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-8-22 20:41 | 显示全部楼层
a woman walks into a supermarket, and notices a male customer whose zipper is 8 ]: m  c" j$ i* c
undone. The woman kindly says" excuse me sir,but your barracks doors are open".
4 C& B$ m. \2 N' B, e3 U* F+ wNot having a clue what the woman was talking about he continued shopping. A few
) C; Q% x& W: ?. Z& T9 Fmoments later another customer approached the man and explained that his zipper
* @7 m! m. G4 C5 x! Y7 A3 mwas undone. The man zipped up and continued his shopping. At the checkout he ran ! p4 j3 a) L  b
into the woman who originally informed him of his zipper.He decides to play into
$ p7 o2 |7 D( g& w- ?her unusual comment; "excuse me maam, when you noticed my barracks door was , T4 e1 \: B! }" P
open, did you happen to see a soldier standing at full attention?" The woman
( K; m3 l$ a% T- d5 cresponded by saying " no, all i saw was a disabled vet sitting on two duffle
  O5 l8 {# g  P2 e" Pbags"
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-8-22 20:42 | 显示全部楼层
Three couples were married and stayed at the same hotel for their honeymoons, ' {' G- J; V9 `0 z% C
where they were all taken care of by Dave the Bellboy. 3 q7 J6 P9 {6 s( S; r  n
+ V% v6 N' j/ s& s1 E% {; s
The first man married a nurse.
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" J. ^8 E! i& w- D4 B, lDave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "What a lucky guy. , q, F( N1 ]% r% A8 U0 V% t; |
Nurses are known to be hot to trot".
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' Y8 ]: ^5 S% J( g7 w- cThe second man married a telephone operator. ! x& B( D0 d% g4 ~; G
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Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself,?Wow, he's a lucky one.
0 P3 Y1 d; w" Q8 N1 uTelephone operators have sexy voices and once you pop that top ) x4 B" h7 H* P
button...A-bomb.?
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The third man married a school teacher. 5 Y8 i8 t7 v, v; O: O: ]  x8 `7 D

% k: q; {" s1 y1 d3 G# n, hDave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "Poor guy, she's pretty
8 t# B- j$ }  a. \' Cbut teachers are just too frigid".* w4 P7 Z  x3 D; P) P
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The next morning, Dave reported to work at 5:30 in the morning. He expected
; I' y0 [) R2 w# s7 ^only the teacher's husband to call for breakfast any minute and the other two ( E: [& A6 [7 i+ U/ L; ?$ V
would call much later in the day.
/ I- U( y( f+ ~+ O
) g) i$ K; \( v7 V( g- X1 OAt 6:00 a.m. the phone rang. It was the nurse's husband wanting breakfast. The
$ _6 b: J" B& ?nurse's husband opened the door and Dave stepped back in shock. The man's
' E& r9 ~: ]3 k6 [# _pajamas were still pressed and his hair nicely combed. 1 A9 f- b* v% B
$ j% _7 t3 d, a
Dave asked, "What happened sir? You married a nurse.* g" N! h5 [) q/ g" o- n# {

1 F+ [& [! o; A( Y$ q5 v$ m" hThe man sourly replies, "Son, don't ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night
9 ?7 r, ^) V( r, C+ g9 g. M) F* O8 d6 n. Hwas her nagging voice saying, 揧ou抮e not sanitary, and you抮e not sanitary."
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At 6:30 a.m., the phone rang again.
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6 _; A; x5 h/ \The telephone operator's husband called for breakfast. Dave brought it as fast   O) o+ L. Y$ \! j
as possible hoping for the best. The man opened the door and Dave stepped back % Z3 [( A" }8 `
in shock. The man's hair and pajamas were properly combed and pressed.8 s. F0 H& |2 G; q" b. |

& L0 D' E& W2 L  X3 O- Q+ T8 ]Dave asked," What happened? Telephone operators are supposed to be as sexy as % Y2 p; Y$ h4 ?' y* j
their voices." . X' v  K* t5 w) Y( u3 M

+ J" O" z( W6 Z8 B5 l  H( gThe man sourly replies "Son, don't ever marry a telephone operator. All I : n1 t3 M  ]5 }: @. u$ |
heard last night was her nasal voice saying, "You're three minutes are up, your 5 D4 [% S* f) \% U) n
three minutes are up."
1 R+ i, W7 L/ ~5 S
+ f3 N& p  g: `, R, BDave went back down to the desk, just knowing the teacher抯 husband would be 1 m! n5 C4 I4 M( ^: G  h6 s- G+ T8 N
calling any minute.1 a& a1 b, K" Y  D% d$ s' }8 m8 ?
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Finally at 4:30 p.m., the teacher's husband called for breakfast.- {/ M& O3 T- c& @1 T& A% m
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Dave can't believe it but quickly took the breakfast to the couple抯 room. The
# V; }6 o9 T9 A! o% z5 V. Zman opened the door and Dave took a step back in shock. The man was wearing only
% e0 o" P1 Q9 ~4 E: @his boxers, his hair was a mess, and he had scratch marks on his chest, arms and   n$ {/ L& G2 T% z) P
legs.% N2 G9 t7 y$ h6 |2 y
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Joe fearing the worst asked 揥hat happened to you? Did you have a & \5 _- P. M: o8 t
fight?" 3 b/ d* s6 H4 B8 O; Y7 D

# D" O7 k: e, K6 B, nThe man smiled and happily replied, "No. Son, when you marry, be sure to marry
5 Z9 C1 p- h6 K) Ma school teacher. All I heard last night was her sexy smooth voice saying "We 8 a; F9 A/ c  T$ K% y. z3 n- P/ X
are going to do this over and over, until we get right."
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-8-22 22:12 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
good job! thanks for sharing
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