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发表于 2008-8-22 20:40 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new
; C+ H% ]5 Y4 H9 y; }: uBMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a " `/ K* _* t1 c% _
Broni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window 2 N7 {+ t1 j8 ~
and asked the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your " y; {" C5 |9 m" T& {2 F7 b
flock, will you give me one?"" W# [: o4 Q8 b% A& k' H! P

- f, k" v2 `7 \" SThe shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his 9 A% W% c; b  v) v9 s( Z; }
peacefully-grazing flock and calmly answered, "Sure.": v! z) i1 w, }9 B  N1 ~

  D/ ~! T  p' c4 y( K3 NThe yuppie parked his car, whipped out his IBM ThinkPad and connected it to a / W  O# p' R. J1 M5 w1 d
cell phone, then he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where he called up a
6 b7 l2 }  {0 n+ pGPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then opened up a database
. g7 j4 Z9 v6 m" c# m& z4 _" H1 pand an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He sent an email on his 8 A& |( L( b" j/ p9 v& |8 L1 _
Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response. Finally, he prints out
3 ~2 J- K; l* ~1 E/ G* ^. W2 Ka 130 page report on his miniaturized printer then turns to the shepherd and : F' E( a7 N: @- @5 y! V: t( w
says,"You have exactly 1586 sheep".5 s7 E: I6 ]" H4 A! p/ y! h
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"That is correct; take one of the sheep" said the shepherd.
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He watches the young man select one of the animals and bundle it into his 6 `  c7 J. N/ b6 f; P
car.( }5 `% s2 c$ l6 g1 l% f9 Y) |

0 l+ X: N; N! {  @Then the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business
0 l8 k1 g# O. w; Z/ k5 Jis, will you give me back my animal?"
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$ V! R/ I- ~  u7 e; F7 |( d"OK, why not" answered the young man.
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8 r" A1 B4 w5 p; q' C6 f6 F# v"Clearly, you are a consultant" said the shepherd. ) S7 L9 \6 M! M
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"That's correct" says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"% U6 v4 u! J$ _" e! g; M
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"No guessing required" answers the shepherd. "You turned up here although
: j% @0 I0 I% mnobody called you. You want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a
: h* H: ?/ l1 Hquestion I never asked, and you don't know crap about my business.... Now give ' l9 T  H$ n1 z3 S" k
me back my dog".
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-8-22 20:41 | 显示全部楼层
a woman walks into a supermarket, and notices a male customer whose zipper is
4 c2 `) W2 f3 T8 n& F& O7 uundone. The woman kindly says" excuse me sir,but your barracks doors are open".
& @, \2 F) i: z- }$ k7 L# u; j+ N* PNot having a clue what the woman was talking about he continued shopping. A few 9 i3 _" R+ |( I: ^) I
moments later another customer approached the man and explained that his zipper 9 A" [; e! t) m" `. O1 f2 ]) W
was undone. The man zipped up and continued his shopping. At the checkout he ran . h5 Q; E% U$ Y+ o- {
into the woman who originally informed him of his zipper.He decides to play into
9 u/ J% k' A2 U1 R5 @" Bher unusual comment; "excuse me maam, when you noticed my barracks door was " X7 w) F1 C) ^# V
open, did you happen to see a soldier standing at full attention?" The woman
. x* N' j% w& T, tresponded by saying " no, all i saw was a disabled vet sitting on two duffle 4 ]& [, j* \3 t. u5 n2 D3 X
bags"
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-8-22 20:42 | 显示全部楼层
Three couples were married and stayed at the same hotel for their honeymoons,
6 K; k3 r! i, {, Bwhere they were all taken care of by Dave the Bellboy. - p% G$ O: q4 V: g

9 L' a% f6 Z6 H3 O6 T! r1 J! i. YThe first man married a nurse.
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; D  M# O( c+ V" a+ oDave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "What a lucky guy.
" F( w) z, E8 o6 S3 e0 VNurses are known to be hot to trot".3 S& n* n2 z# W6 }6 _
  [; P: {! D* J7 R' F6 B
The second man married a telephone operator. ' R! E; U# Q0 H. N
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Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself,?Wow, he's a lucky one. - w$ {7 [0 w$ S" g' T# ?0 ^  ~
Telephone operators have sexy voices and once you pop that top
/ w0 O" B- ]8 }# l) {button...A-bomb.?& p# K1 K( R5 h' v3 x  i1 r

7 l* `( L2 n1 M# F9 _9 B6 E' VThe third man married a school teacher.
2 w. j# K* p; c( M
' r8 I7 Z* M6 r  K7 g& ^Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "Poor guy, she's pretty
6 M" p/ {! v' O+ |5 K  Nbut teachers are just too frigid"., r6 v6 }; {9 ?

% C' [# K/ d: K6 Y+ i# xThe next morning, Dave reported to work at 5:30 in the morning. He expected ; w1 P: l" z; p. K8 |
only the teacher's husband to call for breakfast any minute and the other two
" A' ^# H5 t& m5 _4 Wwould call much later in the day.
- s' x1 M5 O' }( [
  u3 H% \  d7 f8 k! o) v2 OAt 6:00 a.m. the phone rang. It was the nurse's husband wanting breakfast. The
# L  C% G- [& L$ d4 Enurse's husband opened the door and Dave stepped back in shock. The man's 6 }0 n1 j1 J; e
pajamas were still pressed and his hair nicely combed. : L$ [4 G' I0 A1 q8 F* |

9 ^) j4 z: J1 |" }7 v; m( iDave asked, "What happened sir? You married a nurse.2 u. ~- T7 q$ Z- i8 @' @5 b* L

1 y" k! G% c# s0 r* [! X0 EThe man sourly replies, "Son, don't ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night " A) D2 S/ Y0 J# {6 x
was her nagging voice saying, 揧ou抮e not sanitary, and you抮e not sanitary."" s" r% o% z, p4 ?/ N- G$ M

  v$ w9 X' D1 s. v: C  M, kAt 6:30 a.m., the phone rang again.' r5 A6 o7 `( @* j! R; @( ?1 X

+ E& X" H1 W& ]3 `6 ^' wThe telephone operator's husband called for breakfast. Dave brought it as fast
+ B% J9 X' x% }( Kas possible hoping for the best. The man opened the door and Dave stepped back ) O2 l' O/ x4 W1 L3 R3 ~7 Q
in shock. The man's hair and pajamas were properly combed and pressed.
5 |" Q5 D" S7 ?2 h) r9 k) {6 [
; v' K! v+ v0 X' r  u( _( @$ tDave asked," What happened? Telephone operators are supposed to be as sexy as * E/ ?9 J1 k& s! x" }  z$ x$ ^) w# n
their voices."   p/ n, N- p$ @
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The man sourly replies "Son, don't ever marry a telephone operator. All I # O- O+ U- }) {  j
heard last night was her nasal voice saying, "You're three minutes are up, your
7 M+ @% u4 p* h6 Z( w$ r2 [three minutes are up." " g( b, L$ J9 u! {

- d; B% q+ M4 S# h* i) Z% XDave went back down to the desk, just knowing the teacher抯 husband would be
0 C1 h  ]" Q8 }3 V1 a- vcalling any minute.
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" ]3 U) V" D( L, O/ M4 f" dFinally at 4:30 p.m., the teacher's husband called for breakfast.
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Dave can't believe it but quickly took the breakfast to the couple抯 room. The
' Q, t" X. y5 T# q9 A% Pman opened the door and Dave took a step back in shock. The man was wearing only * I! _  [2 q" L7 ~. u# f
his boxers, his hair was a mess, and he had scratch marks on his chest, arms and 2 H! ^1 O1 Z2 d) N* l0 }
legs.! o* P! \' \; h# q* ^
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Joe fearing the worst asked 揥hat happened to you? Did you have a
* f/ n6 b9 y1 L# wfight?"
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$ G* z+ L- A# J2 O2 P2 U4 nThe man smiled and happily replied, "No. Son, when you marry, be sure to marry
" u6 f" H8 h! o: l/ S+ Ka school teacher. All I heard last night was her sexy smooth voice saying "We
" {& e3 n  @# Q+ o, c, ]: @3 G: Care going to do this over and over, until we get right."
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发表于 2008-8-22 22:12 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
good job! thanks for sharing
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