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weekend happyness

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发表于 2008-8-22 20:40 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new 4 H: X1 v. S7 G
BMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a 3 T2 ?  i; a8 b" e. b
Broni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window 6 Q& S3 g; i* x( F; x( ^8 C* U
and asked the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your 8 w4 l; j8 e* e# O6 H
flock, will you give me one?"2 j2 ~" h# E+ U0 ^3 ^+ S2 \
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The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his + B" e4 }6 d- m! A# V! }
peacefully-grazing flock and calmly answered, "Sure."  r, v, Z7 n& D/ ^
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The yuppie parked his car, whipped out his IBM ThinkPad and connected it to a
! P5 B/ S9 x3 F9 icell phone, then he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where he called up a : b. H! A! t9 |" K  g' {
GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then opened up a database ; v, T. W5 C* O4 f# e$ p6 ~
and an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He sent an email on his ! c2 ]% ^1 I1 q5 D
Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response. Finally, he prints out 9 f8 A. Q5 W) t: D
a 130 page report on his miniaturized printer then turns to the shepherd and 5 _( v# j6 i" g- f" Y
says,"You have exactly 1586 sheep".
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+ u7 K, h7 [7 W8 U"That is correct; take one of the sheep" said the shepherd. & U* @' l5 V9 V) g8 r7 |

) X& J/ ~6 T+ R0 ?2 Y! c& i! SHe watches the young man select one of the animals and bundle it into his / K7 F) A- i: _; h
car.
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$ b" p% E8 [; x' i- C9 Q; w) f  p  IThen the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business
; w; [3 D( l, k+ c5 J+ e0 {is, will you give me back my animal?"( \0 o4 }0 I8 K. Y5 m" k4 i$ f( s

. V- H$ w% O; |& T# y9 S7 ["OK, why not" answered the young man.6 z. H, @' P2 A; l

9 ]! O' l- Q: r4 m8 ^5 B"Clearly, you are a consultant" said the shepherd.
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3 H$ M% s. q8 j7 A6 o"That's correct" says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
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* D* A$ s# ]5 w! V( \5 k"No guessing required" answers the shepherd. "You turned up here although
: _2 A: R1 r; T2 S2 o1 qnobody called you. You want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a 4 f3 ~1 e8 i6 ~  p2 x
question I never asked, and you don't know crap about my business.... Now give ; y% Z% q& Z1 i% o$ ?& G
me back my dog".
理袁律师事务所
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-8-22 20:41 | 显示全部楼层
a woman walks into a supermarket, and notices a male customer whose zipper is
+ R# [+ x- z8 H1 J" U2 Pundone. The woman kindly says" excuse me sir,but your barracks doors are open".
5 ?6 q3 g5 {. T; M2 U, Z8 fNot having a clue what the woman was talking about he continued shopping. A few
. L1 h( {2 M& pmoments later another customer approached the man and explained that his zipper
! Z* Y* i* }0 b* I0 Wwas undone. The man zipped up and continued his shopping. At the checkout he ran / S, X+ C; [$ _- I/ h
into the woman who originally informed him of his zipper.He decides to play into
9 i% h* P7 U0 V3 Y! {+ u  p! e' vher unusual comment; "excuse me maam, when you noticed my barracks door was 7 F9 `: V* L4 b& H
open, did you happen to see a soldier standing at full attention?" The woman : q+ h2 V* I4 X! v8 \& Q
responded by saying " no, all i saw was a disabled vet sitting on two duffle ! G- p6 H+ W5 T/ H
bags"
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-8-22 20:42 | 显示全部楼层
Three couples were married and stayed at the same hotel for their honeymoons, . P& _. ~5 m% S" \8 Y% D9 o
where they were all taken care of by Dave the Bellboy. # s; q# D% r" Z9 w( G  W

) Z) J% B" R8 a" KThe first man married a nurse. $ x2 f% i4 ?% X  r' k" S

! q+ X( y3 w! VDave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "What a lucky guy.   a$ t" t, W. Y" q, M) I
Nurses are known to be hot to trot"." y$ l2 z5 L; R+ H- o
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The second man married a telephone operator.
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Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself,?Wow, he's a lucky one.
, Y' ?! F) ^) a2 Q0 N4 b$ N3 sTelephone operators have sexy voices and once you pop that top
6 Y$ O/ G* `1 p# ]7 K5 xbutton...A-bomb.?
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The third man married a school teacher. * P0 y5 X3 u9 F* ?
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Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "Poor guy, she's pretty 1 \- t/ F' X$ o2 A2 i
but teachers are just too frigid".3 I9 g3 u0 o& `- L( M  q( A

( H. E* }+ W$ \The next morning, Dave reported to work at 5:30 in the morning. He expected
9 ]2 y% L( _0 c$ W* U* x4 v: Ronly the teacher's husband to call for breakfast any minute and the other two - x7 x3 b5 X: y7 I# G0 U6 _
would call much later in the day.
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. l- L3 @: ~9 F6 E' s8 w5 hAt 6:00 a.m. the phone rang. It was the nurse's husband wanting breakfast. The
! I' j! i( o# Z  }nurse's husband opened the door and Dave stepped back in shock. The man's
  y' X8 s8 O  u" _" w# i7 ?pajamas were still pressed and his hair nicely combed. 9 V7 k# Q4 G5 s3 l# P
6 |4 `2 V' b& w) W, E0 u
Dave asked, "What happened sir? You married a nurse.
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! a0 V2 e0 _- c3 A" c3 B9 B& SThe man sourly replies, "Son, don't ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night ; z. V4 n" p8 n8 e0 f+ N: K; F9 q
was her nagging voice saying, 揧ou抮e not sanitary, and you抮e not sanitary."" O5 F+ p+ B5 A! E: |, M

  G% T  r* _$ L+ b8 Q# [6 |At 6:30 a.m., the phone rang again.- b' G5 x0 [/ h( [, |+ D6 C( }  F

0 D& {0 Q, Q# \9 K( JThe telephone operator's husband called for breakfast. Dave brought it as fast " B& `5 S; Q# K! |4 L, X; r# E+ E! Y
as possible hoping for the best. The man opened the door and Dave stepped back
  {  X; N" w9 E3 N4 Rin shock. The man's hair and pajamas were properly combed and pressed.0 v' R3 Z3 q9 x6 y* L

9 y, G4 w, Q. e- N+ X1 P5 _Dave asked," What happened? Telephone operators are supposed to be as sexy as
6 p0 M+ c( p5 n- o7 ]' Etheir voices."
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- q* v( \4 ]% XThe man sourly replies "Son, don't ever marry a telephone operator. All I / Z4 h5 |9 O8 m6 A3 h, m, H0 L
heard last night was her nasal voice saying, "You're three minutes are up, your + j+ k$ o  Q) O' f1 w3 @; {9 A
three minutes are up." - P& Y5 H3 h* U! U

- L/ F* H  V: F, n2 {' oDave went back down to the desk, just knowing the teacher抯 husband would be
* U7 c* v. ]+ N, U3 o/ Vcalling any minute.; V+ n: k$ @& D8 s2 V
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Finally at 4:30 p.m., the teacher's husband called for breakfast.
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2 a" y" C# v. u) ?' h6 hDave can't believe it but quickly took the breakfast to the couple抯 room. The
' f/ C& g8 U1 g9 j2 [2 N; Zman opened the door and Dave took a step back in shock. The man was wearing only
* X! u! z4 ]2 E5 i& Ehis boxers, his hair was a mess, and he had scratch marks on his chest, arms and
7 b8 Y, t: B# vlegs.7 I4 c7 X; g. U8 c0 d* d8 g  _, b
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Joe fearing the worst asked 揥hat happened to you? Did you have a $ P* Q5 b& b) G) [  A, N3 N
fight?"
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! M7 l( L+ H* ~' _5 r. _2 GThe man smiled and happily replied, "No. Son, when you marry, be sure to marry
. D: ?! D* F4 k1 [# ?& La school teacher. All I heard last night was her sexy smooth voice saying "We
7 z% Y1 N( C4 d$ }are going to do this over and over, until we get right."
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发表于 2008-8-22 22:12 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
good job! thanks for sharing
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