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weekend happyness

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发表于 2008-8-22 20:40 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new ) B* ~  a. |" p, i2 S; L
BMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a 7 Y; A& s: s/ i! m) m( G- ]
Broni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window
8 ?; G( A6 x' O, w# h. Oand asked the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your
4 c0 ?( U+ p) h1 ^flock, will you give me one?"7 p- p0 @* {$ o% A

' K: {* x% c$ i, `5 N1 bThe shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his
7 S/ N2 ~, V% _2 Qpeacefully-grazing flock and calmly answered, "Sure."
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The yuppie parked his car, whipped out his IBM ThinkPad and connected it to a + l, @4 W/ a8 r9 L+ h8 M
cell phone, then he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where he called up a / t% x' B+ L1 F! m- s& Q
GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then opened up a database " X6 [2 {4 S2 B& s  m
and an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He sent an email on his - ^! X( w2 S* i
Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response. Finally, he prints out
0 ?: V* r' X# K! o  ga 130 page report on his miniaturized printer then turns to the shepherd and . R% i; T, C4 p5 r4 y2 [& U
says,"You have exactly 1586 sheep".$ c( A; o: c, U6 V6 X

( {) ^7 _! t" ]3 f$ H* z  Q/ z"That is correct; take one of the sheep" said the shepherd.
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0 l- h: B4 ~5 qHe watches the young man select one of the animals and bundle it into his + h% x/ B. o5 k! a: [0 [' b
car.
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Then the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business : s0 C/ v+ d, S5 B1 O
is, will you give me back my animal?"8 p* y7 C0 N& ^+ e# F/ I  C9 I
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"OK, why not" answered the young man.. B! G, L. ~# W/ N9 F

7 J9 H. U$ ^1 l. B"Clearly, you are a consultant" said the shepherd. 7 z' m$ S' _! x
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"That's correct" says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
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; g$ t( q, g& ^! l+ K' n: w6 K. b"No guessing required" answers the shepherd. "You turned up here although - W4 X$ H0 g/ r# B& Q8 f
nobody called you. You want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a
# T( U0 [; u! j8 r) m- [question I never asked, and you don't know crap about my business.... Now give 3 S1 v) ~5 A) l# V' v# L$ n
me back my dog".
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-8-22 20:41 | 显示全部楼层
a woman walks into a supermarket, and notices a male customer whose zipper is : K2 ?9 r. A, _9 t) T  ]5 l
undone. The woman kindly says" excuse me sir,but your barracks doors are open". - z" p. p! ]4 _* u) m/ ^
Not having a clue what the woman was talking about he continued shopping. A few # o  `4 r8 a  G6 c" a
moments later another customer approached the man and explained that his zipper   L9 ]1 v, h2 \! n/ }( @) r
was undone. The man zipped up and continued his shopping. At the checkout he ran
* [7 G6 N/ D# n( x% `$ M% \7 N6 x" winto the woman who originally informed him of his zipper.He decides to play into 9 `) g9 C$ Y' w* l- }
her unusual comment; "excuse me maam, when you noticed my barracks door was 4 l2 b' A3 V1 @
open, did you happen to see a soldier standing at full attention?" The woman 9 K. O6 o  t' n" R% o) c+ q
responded by saying " no, all i saw was a disabled vet sitting on two duffle
% P: H6 @5 J8 m& T. I* Dbags"
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-8-22 20:42 | 显示全部楼层
Three couples were married and stayed at the same hotel for their honeymoons,
" P# q# y7 ]2 k; rwhere they were all taken care of by Dave the Bellboy.
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, ?, A- G6 R( U9 P5 sThe first man married a nurse.
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7 {- E5 H% {; l1 _* [1 oDave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "What a lucky guy. + }* G. r, E: J( g, j4 F/ `, c
Nurses are known to be hot to trot".. m) v! z( o* y4 [- ?

+ m/ k1 C! k& A% oThe second man married a telephone operator.
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Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself,?Wow, he's a lucky one. 5 `- `$ r- I, z; E& H* @
Telephone operators have sexy voices and once you pop that top 1 t+ L# B: V8 D9 }" C( |5 i
button...A-bomb.?: n& U3 T, X% {7 v; Z7 Z! L
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The third man married a school teacher.
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1 \" [: ?* F1 V1 z3 c6 ?Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "Poor guy, she's pretty 1 F, C$ c; M3 m1 j3 n
but teachers are just too frigid".
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The next morning, Dave reported to work at 5:30 in the morning. He expected
5 a+ F* `# R  i# Bonly the teacher's husband to call for breakfast any minute and the other two 2 @2 M$ m& Q; r0 [
would call much later in the day.
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At 6:00 a.m. the phone rang. It was the nurse's husband wanting breakfast. The
+ j  z/ q4 z& V8 _; y0 o  ^- ]nurse's husband opened the door and Dave stepped back in shock. The man's
* n3 c7 ?: W' P$ f2 Qpajamas were still pressed and his hair nicely combed. , e+ k8 L. x$ f  L
6 d7 `. G1 Z; ~7 \
Dave asked, "What happened sir? You married a nurse.
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The man sourly replies, "Son, don't ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night 3 B& e) i7 e+ s) {" C0 C
was her nagging voice saying, 揧ou抮e not sanitary, and you抮e not sanitary."; F" `( x+ L/ G# D# \& d' W
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At 6:30 a.m., the phone rang again.* v' z$ P. C4 \$ v9 e* \

; v2 ]6 g5 K3 A' J$ \" q& S! d" \6 `The telephone operator's husband called for breakfast. Dave brought it as fast : m& ]: {# B$ A+ L: ^" n9 P
as possible hoping for the best. The man opened the door and Dave stepped back
1 n: W8 t- I) P% E- @; l" n: win shock. The man's hair and pajamas were properly combed and pressed.
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Dave asked," What happened? Telephone operators are supposed to be as sexy as
' Q! @. }: L6 O' i& Q# ~6 z/ ntheir voices."   k# d* b, d; C! ]8 V; {9 D1 O
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The man sourly replies "Son, don't ever marry a telephone operator. All I
/ U' h& x/ U+ ^heard last night was her nasal voice saying, "You're three minutes are up, your
( q2 I  F8 F2 ]three minutes are up." 4 s+ ?0 S8 F& _5 i  [# s

& q7 B3 p+ s1 X9 p0 iDave went back down to the desk, just knowing the teacher抯 husband would be
( J5 s3 c. W( L/ w' m, V/ l$ l9 b2 ?calling any minute.+ [9 ]  T3 b) i% b$ i

( f  Y( X2 d: s8 _* PFinally at 4:30 p.m., the teacher's husband called for breakfast.
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Dave can't believe it but quickly took the breakfast to the couple抯 room. The 3 j$ \$ _. P% M, {3 K* ~1 x0 D
man opened the door and Dave took a step back in shock. The man was wearing only 1 z$ {5 W+ d* Z. n( ]0 P$ r# L
his boxers, his hair was a mess, and he had scratch marks on his chest, arms and - h) _" n/ `- _9 `; q+ M
legs.
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Joe fearing the worst asked 揥hat happened to you? Did you have a ' N) G' m; o  h: h8 K$ Y
fight?"
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The man smiled and happily replied, "No. Son, when you marry, be sure to marry
7 i0 [$ \# }- l" ]! V4 a% s7 ?a school teacher. All I heard last night was her sexy smooth voice saying "We
, z) L3 m6 r6 c3 P6 T# care going to do this over and over, until we get right."
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发表于 2008-8-22 22:12 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
good job! thanks for sharing
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