Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:

" K4 m  m) Z; c0 N2 w8 R1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)

2 I. }/ ]) o) n( {+ _* f! [2 I2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

& e. o% g' `* k4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
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6 Q' P. h0 Z2 e6 l5. Are You Andy or Barney?

4 ]' l, H7 H7 p' R6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
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8 N7 |$ r( \; [! x/ |5 c7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
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# }" e; J$ n8 E2 P$ W. b8 T8. I pay your salary!

/ U. c  V" z" e1 b1 N9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

4 p$ i1 S# M; z" v10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
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11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

% Q( m2 u( ~' i  H5 T! @, e0 U12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"