 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident
$ |+ H* ^' I( F5 SOne day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.3 C) D- {5 R! [, z
" V% z/ }5 j/ o( ?7 YThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
- X& q( \/ Y! v6 a$ o7 [
1 u& o+ s2 S& A. h; VHe took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.0 o' x# s0 r/ g. Z6 B
7 N7 c6 a+ [! D( v4 J# J
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
% b" S7 [# @1 ?# c, q
" v/ V; B: N% p+ a- VThe blonde started laughing./ s: M8 c9 T- ?* J
2 W8 `, D( J: h/ B7 y6 k) t; ]/ w: W
This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.9 w$ ` Y5 X0 z0 Y0 h
4 S: C& m6 ], N/ ]: [7 b) jThis time the blonde laughed even harder.# g. A! Q4 c; c! i! _; }" q# s
5 x6 U7 O& Y, i c. F, |( U1 R" C
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.' E6 I' e! m; d
7 r) c( N6 E* j1 j3 q7 @& s# k
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
( E* {/ W& f1 x# J; A; u ^) f0 U( }5 K% N, @: g! K1 q
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"% }6 J; [3 Y. w" y J
7 d( l( I- `" ^+ v1 ?: B/ N
Rowing Your Boat
5 v& W+ m& C0 V/ h( R3 @4 bTwo blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
1 R' G7 t9 |. f& @& d. L7 }7 u2 j9 L3 A
: k4 _8 o2 }3 A0 T' \The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
$ t$ G2 w' O4 n
4 B, f" }' Q2 K* [5 i" N4 l7 gTo this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
5 H& _+ [* `# p8 f2 V, {3 Y6 s
: {% Z3 i4 R" E7 G) |$ _I Want to Buy That
7 ?1 h, g' f9 C/ O; x6 GA blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
! C) Z0 U& l7 k' S$ P) t4 f2 y8 _, a m% T
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
r3 m9 Z i4 x: S( z+ ^1 m ~, b& P( W6 l: z
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.: V) N8 P; ~5 Z7 |# X5 m) c9 Q
& _6 p3 K1 \' mFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.( n3 A/ w/ Y: p3 i: K- w. d7 o
" [4 M7 \! s; ]$ A0 j* {Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
$ t ^' h6 m6 v6 M, M2 m( v2 q X% r5 F+ D4 w3 R0 V( L
To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.* X- D# h, Q2 |; C/ y
/ z5 I) R* G: @9 `
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
W& m$ H& M8 \( ~% }2 }; c. |) \* @7 p: o
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
& p4 \7 Y3 R) V) g2 M- `* j' d; g: g# y! P A- F; q& w
Are You Really Sure?
$ ~5 e a/ b6 n* @8 B4 fA blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
2 X+ \% X$ w! o, Z0 Y+ X" Z" r
. Q% q/ |) h/ y/ V$ P' ~In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something.": l3 u; ^. Q3 T0 ~
2 b- v- A! z$ z6 A% OOur bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" Z0 o& ]- \8 y7 z; H7 }1 ~' e0 r
2 [( A' G( O% U7 wThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
2 B% x+ F/ \5 _1 |/ J0 d+ v6 b+ p# V7 q& [! `% z
Blonde Sky Divers2 [5 R) I6 l0 a: ^9 h) w
A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.( | ?' U+ L0 g: {7 U
/ B: `& n2 J+ i$ V7 x; h6 k5 ]" e
The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.
: ]+ h- e3 F( c: r& n9 J: p: a+ Y. ?) N
She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.+ n0 }2 M$ P# |' J! C
5 A$ _; R: r* N+ R% Q6 f7 |The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
% ?8 {' O& x& e0 u; F9 {& V; u* N- }& ]. e9 @
[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|