 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident
8 [( C. n) @+ S' \2 M1 N( Q# ^One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
$ p! M7 M) @8 c0 ?
+ B( F; y1 e! l1 j& h3 oThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
- m, C5 p% G! J2 H" ~. f5 s. l/ X, _' _. ]% K3 ~# |! l
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.8 ]& a0 q2 Z; h- Y/ O
+ Q; u" a- W9 q$ D1 }Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.* Z2 [: q' W# a* z/ k0 W1 E
4 ]. \( @2 P2 MThe blonde started laughing.4 R2 n8 _. b, J$ m/ r+ C* I
, y" p# [' l i/ X5 j
This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
( y0 L0 P, z( q2 A) Q4 I6 F
- X0 F0 M. j7 G: ?6 aThis time the blonde laughed even harder.
) X4 s4 w! g# A4 L& W5 B1 Y, C( K6 s
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.7 ^( `6 S) v4 k# e* ~" l+ ^
: k( K% \8 J' P# [( uThe blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
, `+ t/ F2 O% Q& J) m$ S0 k* \# Q5 ~1 I0 Z
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"$ c8 o4 J: S, I3 f# M
p/ V$ y, c6 I ]Rowing Your Boat
B( Z3 _$ `8 Y' i9 g2 {$ ITwo blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.5 ^/ }- r6 } s' ~. y: y( c
" \. n' l; [& Q" k. u8 y
The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!" B. V2 P" W. E) b
" v1 ]( _ g) F- p. L) [( F9 U
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
( J% W( l7 X" E0 o/ }. F% m( `7 x- X& v' P6 {. x/ x
I Want to Buy That1 Y! b/ j4 G0 v* l1 o
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. p- \" e7 Y) _5 o/ A4 N
7 |! k) _) ^& I0 l1 ?/ mThe clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black./ V+ D' m0 b; }6 t' c @) C( D
) N" b! i, Z- z5 @' b. t6 b( BThe next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
& H3 k, \( F5 n: X2 o: p
& N i2 c5 m$ @5 KFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
7 u& o& B* G1 z7 c( ^; p+ s1 R; y. t( \8 q
Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
/ t' y. \4 u5 e
3 R0 X# z2 f6 b8 }7 KTo her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.6 B- }# @3 x& b$ R9 z
% A* v( b, K) }4 ]9 W
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
7 V# n7 Y4 _+ R$ K5 L+ M* ^3 P' k5 a
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!". b+ R9 S7 ]3 Z b: k
* M+ L; @4 k, c" EAre You Really Sure?
( G0 f. o" I0 D5 PA blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"( @- w9 l: x4 b
7 C, V$ f/ ]( O: G* p
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."/ y5 v) T# B. `( a/ `# g: J/ r1 p
. }: F; |5 {* c2 m% G# [! ~* y
Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
2 a: V" T* O2 ?! M. Z- K3 H1 j
0 n- N: A) C. W0 y- A) U1 LThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
4 p' J9 k" G* v& r9 i7 w" {& s! m5 a; q b! E, R
Blonde Sky Divers
& u. b. W, q- A! S PA blonde and a brunette are skydiving.2 U9 h8 t+ k! A. D3 P( }
; Q9 k y( }6 r4 X. |; g
The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.+ Q3 L" ]( S4 G+ u, {+ ~( Z
* }; k& G! B3 Z/ O1 L- D% n+ }
She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.
1 m$ {. w2 F" [4 ?* ^
5 u" e+ ~0 w: q0 d) DThe blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
" W4 ~ S6 D" f1 q8 U L8 s/ t0 N; U! u5 Z- s
[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-10-7 12:29
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
楼主
发表于 2008-10-9 10:41
