 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident. |* q$ k1 _. W0 y0 e
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
- m* a; R" F8 ]# \4 v0 n$ F3 g( z- S! c5 w- q
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
- f& T5 @, T$ O3 u6 n/ h- M
9 ?2 k: R# t5 ~6 h% K( K# F) a2 ^He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.5 d9 }; e4 ]: {+ A+ P/ m( _: E: S
% N1 Q+ F0 r, @- N7 Q9 SFurious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
9 B1 w8 f8 C+ r8 g# c1 l6 q/ F! o k! z; Q& s
The blonde started laughing.
* [$ m" {) W* ^7 y
& D( I% Q5 R: NThis made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
n- d7 u: Z% T/ d2 U+ J0 O9 V
# |7 g9 R# O3 r0 m7 T; X, SThis time the blonde laughed even harder.2 k* \. O" m4 `: r9 N- ?" D
3 G( _% n" L. `$ E, a& V4 MLivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
6 D6 h$ j3 g/ y, |8 W8 N% Z) h$ j4 g+ c* W
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
: v! |- S4 p9 I+ i% G" {% d9 u, C4 j) o: Q9 U2 S5 p1 b2 N$ a
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!", U9 c( r7 n& Q. y0 q; \9 d. }4 h
' R, m: B8 P2 I. y# xRowing Your Boat0 ?+ Y( {: h% e- w$ ]! ?. E6 d
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
; l8 F5 @: X) `( E9 `7 a
1 Q6 w/ y( r: ^3 ?The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
9 \7 K. i$ C# h
: K2 N$ C, j0 c1 M% ATo this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."1 B. B6 d; t- r: N0 J2 e/ f6 V
6 c! W* B% A& G- f- R' p6 k
I Want to Buy That; `: {8 c1 |5 e" @1 ?' E* h
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
+ d, I% }; T. j3 T- n0 x5 A) A7 p& ]9 L# y6 ?
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black." v: K. w4 r% x# ^& @2 w! R) w0 r
* B* t+ D: ~5 A) |- {( A v- W
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
' h; {) x7 g- G* V% S& W. J, w
1 k3 u( O* t4 _0 ?Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
0 ~3 G, p4 X# H, l- ~4 \4 I2 d- e0 M9 o* ?: f) i/ c9 u- h
Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.6 J7 R4 Z# ?1 i$ y
% R4 R, q$ S4 d* i
To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.' a: ]3 }! I- C& E" @: `
* r! S/ D* t$ jThe blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"# D& ]# h8 r$ T" p; f/ A
( T! D- X2 D0 v( `$ D
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
" A2 @+ h# X) n. d m) Q- u: q- V9 O a& d
Are You Really Sure?0 A/ n- N2 D- g
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"5 h5 L4 |& } ?. W7 G' t
6 ^. Y S8 }; f; h0 qIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."
4 y/ \3 w0 m3 k
) H# E2 B, x; a2 {2 z% YOur bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"+ z3 h- S b4 }9 |
2 a C' x" J: N$ G5 AThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
& l, ^9 e& m+ O& F" o% C
) _2 A) g: o0 {, U# o9 Q, q7 ZBlonde Sky Divers
% n" R+ B6 j2 h( BA blonde and a brunette are skydiving.
4 P9 b+ B- G* Y/ n7 W
$ I+ |+ [8 m1 j! s- t. z9 A- FThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.# [9 |. K1 K1 S* o
: N& ~# z) U- n
She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing./ L1 v5 Z2 L H6 R) @/ R
5 w! q) a& @0 _% b
The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
& f% ^9 ?: H! K4 K& ?, W. } j. u0 D5 R0 P8 S
[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|