 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident
& o( w: V( r- f) F* oOne day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.0 u! M0 v4 \6 H7 d) v6 {5 ?% U' l
* @& B1 {" O+ e9 yThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.1 o1 t0 V. i+ }
/ X' x( L4 P/ e- l; p0 H2 c4 pHe took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
; S% H# [8 J& a6 \* X& E$ a1 f8 C. g" E/ G7 i
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.& @4 @" d$ {6 S
/ ~; u2 \- i& H/ |& X! KThe blonde started laughing./ c2 E- J0 [7 Q/ S( p6 Q- v# s
d ^* d& M' r0 E3 N- ZThis made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.8 U' k2 I8 @+ Q8 Z; R' e$ `
: g% B, V5 ~& t# J8 E, aThis time the blonde laughed even harder.
& o+ g1 V6 [3 p6 x1 ^
6 k8 F* R5 X/ I- P/ }6 O' \Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
$ k" c' h1 K; D& i3 m0 n3 u; H
4 r1 b3 L5 c2 ?. ?1 H+ zThe blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.8 G2 Y5 e2 \9 [. ]8 |3 g2 u
( c' v* i7 D" j8 k, v, S$ S9 XThe blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
+ S* R6 L+ c3 D# [! }. j1 M
/ r% _ t6 ^, E$ j. K5 z+ Q+ J, yRowing Your Boat+ L0 c) w; c3 h+ j
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.4 I, w7 }0 j( |' o! y
+ q* o1 z4 K' c2 r
The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
! [" `) Z ~) x ^" v) q
1 E+ t7 ] c3 y) rTo this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
) K' T: Y' p' N. ]* F5 c( @2 `% [! Y; }8 t# q
I Want to Buy That- @3 R& H% n% v0 Z& k5 Z' K
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.+ r3 b) G4 a1 B5 j6 h K% R8 q
% ?8 h) v- P" D: A |( m( M
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
# X; w5 X x$ P
+ M& L9 a0 H7 k$ E6 ]The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
7 i( P4 g7 e5 a
$ J: g. n$ m0 o; jFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.- \, I/ E/ J0 |2 e2 |
* B& `: n$ \9 N& D. ]Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. y& U' q* n, u1 p9 @$ E
' a* ^, C# W, {% P4 n
To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.
/ r( Y% l3 v6 l0 E6 Z7 X ^, O0 h" E8 P# G( u
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
2 l# C3 B9 e- t# ?* q/ f/ l& a7 T/ Y5 X M2 ?
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
8 B" Y) r# D* _+ k8 N( w6 r. J; L2 T) g" R" F
Are You Really Sure?1 {( w* B- N$ ^( P9 C. S' l
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"3 |7 A& f3 P: z2 d) o% i* e/ \
' J+ J4 m; P. M. h- CIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."/ ]4 x! c, J$ v0 [2 }: E
6 _% @* M' g+ o# XOur bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
8 v/ _. b: ?9 \' M$ `
4 s& m/ H; g1 p! rThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
- C1 f3 \( R( J4 z* k
8 }2 h# m' V d) {; t) PBlonde Sky Divers
. r- b/ @4 T" _A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.
. S& j3 x' ~' [7 Q! m, D
s( t0 P1 A6 w* f( b/ d. CThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.
9 j: s4 N# W6 a5 v, X7 j( Q7 l
, F! j4 {3 ^! K, U+ G2 \- YShe pulls the emergency cord and still nothing., l& W3 k& D) u* Q
2 S: B8 n: k, ~ f4 [. q; HThe blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
1 r: ?# d: E" [2 R3 P. i# L" I$ k2 o, n8 P! J
[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|