 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident$ X" Y# w& r& _3 w5 K) _4 F7 `
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
3 x# K% z5 ^- |2 c5 m6 \" A4 r; V7 L3 E
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
8 U# c4 ^& s/ Y" D( a) O1 Q0 a
* u1 P- C- W) GHe took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
2 L7 d% m0 r) \, p. y- N
; Q" N1 e" K: k, f* T! J+ s: `Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.0 {! g* Z! E" W. v! P5 r- _+ y
0 h, U3 }; w. y9 x H ~The blonde started laughing.
3 v* W: }( T, Z
$ \8 I5 z" \7 f) ~2 IThis made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.2 S( ^0 o+ K1 t; P$ S
+ i4 ?, m' j* w+ v4 a% ]% R
This time the blonde laughed even harder.% d G6 F# r+ n; l" m
& W8 Y' U1 v7 @5 l7 z$ gLivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
7 {: A }) R g+ ^# `0 D3 E6 t: A. h3 S& i- @2 ^' R" j
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
0 S+ L5 S% A {8 U. d8 f# @5 R+ u% n; J/ s9 R( Y
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"& w- X9 V" L& V' O1 i
) X: v& h# _& K/ z _3 v7 c: z
Rowing Your Boat
1 `% l; M7 c2 p _, V$ M5 m) KTwo blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat./ x+ c. U( |9 \* b* K4 C
, X8 ?8 d( _/ X: S4 tThe driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
, [. J' ?; U$ u0 H; e+ [$ e7 I3 q3 ^' D: m" B
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
3 f/ G- W1 x% w3 a4 T
1 o0 V8 o# s& e2 S' i; d, MI Want to Buy That
" \; T3 l3 O$ h, GA blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
y F2 X0 h- I: K$ s
+ f" ~7 i1 Y3 j m* \) hThe clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.: n" _8 u4 L4 x8 g( J1 Q
" X( n0 n) x3 i9 c+ M# E3 j" ]$ o+ E! U
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
$ ^ s* M* ^) ~1 H0 [
1 }1 @% r3 X! m1 o h! {4 EFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
^, f9 K X( K2 A# X( w
/ u; ^3 A7 J9 W T' I( ESure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.+ q/ ?) m: n2 }( F+ Y/ c$ {4 c
" h% C6 T6 T! e' u* I# u* v3 y
To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.
5 ^% H: D8 U4 y, G1 l b, w7 M, z
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
8 V" w- h2 I0 m
& r6 ^* R( H! B0 u; I# BThe clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"% x, W) i0 E. C. R' n' ^
+ U: {! @5 Y9 ]Are You Really Sure?
& @' J- R4 l3 A6 I4 gA blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
3 C; E( y/ J3 b9 u7 `8 |7 X
3 J) A+ B" c6 a7 f0 \$ RIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."/ B) V8 k, Y* j) y: g6 n' `
U1 }3 Z) k/ a2 m0 S" NOur bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"3 X! q( |+ G0 r7 g' O% o p4 A# N
3 B; A2 D( j* ]( ~* v
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
; s Q# Z+ f% B; `9 p& M" L4 H
/ i% a( O4 M, G5 T0 h* M' M" Z* S2 sBlonde Sky Divers" B6 _; H% y1 f5 z# ~
A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.6 G2 o: f6 z& c/ [
j7 m& d& a1 W& e: |! b1 T' AThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens./ U; A( ?: P# n1 a: s# Z6 X
% k( n( `2 n1 u* z* q, U- F# ~; l5 X
She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.( c1 O; h; c, |4 N
! U- O8 c a1 x/ Q' z! ^, W/ _
The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"! z+ i) g6 z- o6 T$ ~
& q( o1 h2 p/ v7 X( I b: V
[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|