 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident
4 W2 ?* h2 ?1 \; x+ h# u" [+ BOne day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
2 U: W5 L' l- u! X# W; X: C, D) g& i
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
% f) ^9 C6 |6 z1 W% S3 \; P, Z6 X
2 b+ l, _7 K' C- mHe took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
- a% a; s1 h' V" F! N1 @7 K: z K M5 o: u" [2 @9 H. L- E
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
* l* D9 @8 u! d- j4 K. S0 U
, v5 Z5 ~% x; _9 U, Z- CThe blonde started laughing.% w; H ~3 d8 {
. Q6 O" p& O: J/ b9 V) G& V' }This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
# _2 ]. h9 ~) M6 j: M, l% U' B& q) y0 m1 d2 ?& i
This time the blonde laughed even harder.
" r% z$ ?) p0 m
' Z9 c7 E e8 z9 c% Z0 w9 c* q* \Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
~5 N% ^6 R4 m4 z, t# E9 `' E, t* P7 g
3 F2 C) B8 y. Y$ U8 q2 G' aThe blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
' y8 W$ V: a6 u2 _7 N8 ~: s% o+ b) a" k5 \ w. y5 V, y* u
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!": i& W9 ^3 I7 H1 J* v% q
) t; P% T. ~( D( f7 A# l% Y! GRowing Your Boat# v k# |& X. T
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
: X: `0 H9 O, d: E, F) w" E
+ K/ [/ C! {$ C5 G; w3 x0 L' FThe driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
! S8 X$ M+ o. Y5 i. n0 E3 B0 L! r4 i1 b e; w# g! Z0 f0 G
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."& N! c' m& T" S/ g+ D& A7 ?, G, \
! {; l6 B; `) P* `- ^9 x0 f& MI Want to Buy That/ j5 h3 w7 q6 u Q, ?
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
: B0 x# g8 U5 h0 }% T5 c2 ]& @# ?% Q4 C. m, \/ f2 c
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. T8 X7 U/ J) G
9 X4 w A2 S6 f0 C" @& l# F1 L0 S
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
: D+ c9 Y# ~2 m; L
U6 |9 D$ A/ B, C3 T7 m, VFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.7 J5 h) J+ f" C: p3 f& S
6 O. z$ E4 F `; R7 R$ I8 r; oSure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
+ k) p4 y# Q7 o2 b' |" ^2 z/ s6 ?0 o$ R
To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.; u" y' K- Y( o2 |" R
8 G' |; N, E) W, n% aThe blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
" g3 j7 f+ l- B: z: H0 V6 b; T& S: V2 s; r2 ~, v
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
' W& N& \ v+ O7 W5 [9 d$ O. p% V0 ~2 Q) {0 k* O
Are You Really Sure?# O6 V' ?' f% @! T# f+ p" q
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
+ _5 X: G- m" Z! _1 ~8 i/ j& ]: P/ U: O# W1 x* v# ?3 T; I
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something.". M$ G {! k/ o" S$ z
- N, d2 |( P; \6 u% L% c9 T
Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"0 s2 r3 }2 p' P0 K% w' {+ U3 T
8 \- ?" n2 h) J6 Q2 h! F* j* {
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.". T! t5 | I4 m+ \8 `
$ O7 p1 k1 h8 P' |$ d- F! yBlonde Sky Divers! |) w9 L- N5 W M/ e( v
A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.6 V; b l1 S* W, x( X
5 P; W/ H& U+ _2 E$ NThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.8 B' s4 z ^ G$ R; X3 d0 e
, N C, i" ~2 i# v; u1 \ @
She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.
; a$ u \( L. n/ e q# O/ J; _( S: }6 a
The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
, ]2 e/ y- y4 b, I
; u. x7 s, l x! w( {+ r# F+ q3 A' R* L[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|