 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
- D0 n0 O* U5 rEnglish is a stupid language.
0 W" L3 `- t& B$ `0 ]1 uThere is no egg in the eggplant2 t; A/ h6 t6 O
No ham in the hamburger6 ~+ @" t4 P8 Z% o$ N6 Y. \
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
1 f( F2 y% a, }& F5 V, Y, ]English muffins were not invented in England
3 d9 R, k& M! M$ p) A8 BFrench fries were not invented in France./ v' @ B) v" r, A2 ?+ R& n
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We sometimes take English for granted
& w$ `4 _0 Y/ N- N0 iBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
. r* y5 a3 }" @- W3 p Y* O gQuicksand takes you down slowly
- o2 J& j- j3 S" C3 zBoxing rings are square
4 ~ P1 l* ?6 R% k1 gAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 5 `7 o9 d6 @# b8 r' J( p
* C& j% m; ?! L" }If writers write, how come fingers don't fing." l2 D& l( C1 ]- @& q" u
If the plural of tooth is teeth
9 L8 W3 U7 B+ M# q+ QShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
+ e9 j2 C/ H+ t( n) w# gIf the teacher taught,' [ u; R9 P" H# M
Why didn't the preacher praught.5 J$ y8 f$ d: E8 ]9 H7 [' ^# A+ o9 I0 [
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
% q4 [$ |# n5 n6 |1 B% U5 DWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
" B) X! y+ r E% |' a3 S; RWhy do people recite at a play
" b- m, v- ^2 j7 n0 M; |Yet play at a recital?
; \# x; G# F# iPark on driveways and2 E# J/ @; }. n3 }0 l1 f
Drive on parkways4 {% N. J8 n3 G& q* X5 W5 i; Y
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
" U3 I# {' E9 o3 x3 f1 |Of a language where a house can burn up as
$ l8 C- j7 _% h- O4 O8 C$ tIt burns down. t% A/ F! A) W; G8 m% {
And in which you fill in a form
' ?1 a6 e/ ]6 g4 D4 G, K+ LBy filling it out
! {- y7 T g% l( N1 _And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
3 G" t1 _8 L% V. L: x7 B2 Y! iAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race: {/ q% T }7 D2 p* Z6 d5 K
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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! Q1 M) I' V9 G, I( GThat is why
9 ?2 L k6 T, d# O9 A3 `' `When the stars are out they are visible$ B5 \, o' d6 F7 ?9 s& i) p
But when the lights are out they are invisible! s) D# f( Z+ M$ x8 ]
And why it is that when I wind up my watch! S. s2 M) [- V; F$ @1 d& T1 p
It starts
! J: t% l) `' N+ OBut when I wind up this observation,
4 @+ r5 j H- w" nIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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