 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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$ \) i- }* z; {$ m" M1 a( HLet's face it- F" A2 N1 N/ _ p
English is a stupid language.
9 R0 p" j7 ^- p z0 bThere is no egg in the eggplant z1 ^0 Z* z" ~5 b# d( B5 t
No ham in the hamburger0 N( P: L0 w& r6 V5 a( r9 ]$ J. o
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.9 Y" D! S- T" c8 X
English muffins were not invented in England0 m+ R# m5 }! t& D! q7 d& `
French fries were not invented in France.0 [ [0 m% b8 O* E6 H# a/ m
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We sometimes take English for granted
4 F5 k2 Z: [" Q* v* h B5 pBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
) E% r' n" J/ D5 \6 \( i, \* h1 KQuicksand takes you down slowly% m) I& E( q6 B1 t
Boxing rings are square. {" ], A1 @1 _% G2 C
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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2 _: d, C, g% zIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.8 m$ S1 U$ m( q$ _* j
If the plural of tooth is teeth
* v/ w; M4 m& [' e, ]Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth- z/ U; F' N9 S. e
If the teacher taught,: _8 Q% y" f+ _% d0 u) E5 n+ C
Why didn't the preacher praught.1 |; T+ T% s3 Q! v; ~( C4 i
) @( S5 o( O6 w8 ?4 Q" w' r: EIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
* s2 b' H7 c# T r) k% CWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
9 ?, u8 n, F# A" ~1 CWhy do people recite at a play
: v& Q$ d6 S0 T' k$ jYet play at a recital?8 I% `# _* U2 ^7 K3 s5 t
Park on driveways and
, _2 B( m* L2 w7 i* e8 O3 mDrive on parkways
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$ z' |/ w/ F+ p( ]; m9 gYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
$ @* O! w! p7 R: w/ W$ YOf a language where a house can burn up as
3 C9 `4 M, q; VIt burns down
4 }1 U9 _! _/ c1 b9 I; |" D2 A. VAnd in which you fill in a form # G, J" S3 Q% ]3 V$ o
By filling it out
$ e' [3 h8 g: p& `3 k# wAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!9 Y1 B' z% i% t) G, V. E
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English was invented by people, not computers* B/ m) n" ^ x; C( q% D- ?8 g. z0 m7 ~1 k
And it reflects the creativity of the human race" t3 d; ? }2 z7 |
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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$ j8 {" ]. S) A1 P+ S9 q9 NThat is why. Q" R0 \7 c5 q* r, o
When the stars are out they are visible
. T, C7 Z, x5 sBut when the lights are out they are invisible
e# Q9 H' \. e. UAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch+ o' [# a& F' @- u
It starts% T% p- n1 w' e1 s) e
But when I wind up this observation,. \0 B6 v, u1 R, T5 u& P
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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