 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it# k6 a) \9 u0 I. D2 s/ f; z: z v
English is a stupid language.
; F, c9 J2 ?4 s- p" ]: e8 EThere is no egg in the eggplant
7 l- g' q: {4 _8 L6 p8 Z2 ^+ fNo ham in the hamburger9 \: S/ `' D$ O0 Y: d
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
3 c9 C8 ~5 Z, S" W! d5 x5 P QEnglish muffins were not invented in England
8 u) Q7 C! Z# R, L8 D5 ?0 }- w) gFrench fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted/ u/ z7 i$ r# I& G/ p/ Q6 t. {
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that9 u9 r& x' a# Z$ x( e3 ^+ k
Quicksand takes you down slowly
" b5 p3 W( a2 ABoxing rings are square
0 o+ P# Y4 h" O% `3 q7 u: E/ [, PAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 4 Z% ]! d. K `" G8 {
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
8 o6 |+ J5 k; dIf the plural of tooth is teeth% h+ a* A5 P! F1 G$ K' |( u
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth; U9 P" ~3 a( t
If the teacher taught,
1 y7 p6 j/ q; _/ c4 l5 mWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
. P% m' H: d+ X! z; QWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
' r6 u$ E; x- H; I- uWhy do people recite at a play! f5 K6 ]9 }- A; |2 F0 ]
Yet play at a recital?8 v0 W! x0 P; z, H: Y0 A
Park on driveways and0 H3 D% ~& t2 [$ `' x
Drive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy+ E7 V3 l! D! t! R0 q6 h, |6 B% H
Of a language where a house can burn up as
+ w* a- p8 p& D% GIt burns down
( s- y4 x0 t* W% U0 t3 sAnd in which you fill in a form 8 t. `4 o6 ?2 C5 j
By filling it out
* v" h* \' L. _% y2 v4 l9 tAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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8 T( i2 ~; [: T: ]English was invented by people, not computers, `2 p1 w* g1 W! G/ J
And it reflects the creativity of the human race2 j, @) ~! `, J
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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8 Z2 U) T; q g" C3 r9 Q9 _That is why
" O$ e% T6 @- _6 ]0 ~. ]4 n4 X# RWhen the stars are out they are visible4 V6 D* X& h5 v+ h
But when the lights are out they are invisible4 ~% a! A b4 b
And why it is that when I wind up my watch5 V7 B5 U1 m' x2 b9 X
It starts2 T3 S* g3 ^- d+ `5 L6 h- |
But when I wind up this observation, E) m3 Y0 l( A2 K
It ends. |
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