 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it4 w: d4 f# a! N9 `
English is a stupid language. y" ^: O H/ ~/ Z& i8 I
There is no egg in the eggplant+ {4 F( p. w. x6 |
No ham in the hamburger
. W5 k1 j a S2 m8 ^And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.0 s0 K& z0 K4 V3 D
English muffins were not invented in England3 o0 k- h* ]3 Y @
French fries were not invented in France.* [) X) L/ a( J1 N
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We sometimes take English for granted4 v1 c: K/ c! Y
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
j: x, q3 H) j5 @Quicksand takes you down slowly
8 n+ l) u/ r d; D) H( ~% v/ eBoxing rings are square
) v( Q8 w6 y; |' c0 F, NAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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/ }; }9 E# b. M) j9 x. n& |0 ~If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
3 ^ c0 h* Y& \0 {3 X; Y, BIf the plural of tooth is teeth
7 [+ _+ w; V% P! p" cShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth R. \, A. ?" O9 e: I
If the teacher taught,
' X2 L4 x" Y2 E' F+ A7 BWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables- J2 O8 c. F( w o0 l$ J8 R
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
, M3 Z8 q- u: |2 @/ wWhy do people recite at a play: o4 h( I7 }7 j+ p/ Y8 e4 \9 j. H
Yet play at a recital?
4 p* W: k1 ^4 z0 e# D. i& w- sPark on driveways and
) ^3 b+ g9 v; KDrive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
6 B! ?3 p0 i5 V+ ]7 T: L+ v0 MOf a language where a house can burn up as
8 u7 p, W5 ^2 s2 zIt burns down2 R5 n4 ?: u" X6 y
And in which you fill in a form
2 L( G+ {5 d( b, E7 ~7 QBy filling it out0 Y- m" f2 y( e9 d
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers ?1 D9 l& E9 E" u
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
, S" `+ L+ R. }- `/ m3 F9 {$ z(Which of course isn't a race at all)6 H# q- [" r/ l, u
+ y2 p7 f* p' m. s( | |That is why' a) ]3 L0 d8 M$ w1 n. q7 J
When the stars are out they are visible4 I) j7 O9 W7 Q, z0 a( l' K v5 Z
But when the lights are out they are invisible4 F# L, e$ u* I8 A0 f' O
And why it is that when I wind up my watch4 K9 E' C7 N9 ~2 o8 b! i3 n2 L
It starts5 n4 g0 g( b: w9 B
But when I wind up this observation,/ o6 I# f o$ H- f- |
It ends. |
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