English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
- n. H- v1 A2 M/ J+ Z  Z% O5 O) U7 c
* ?5 E& R+ n5 L$ w' W' TLet's face it
! d2 q9 [8 h; q# ZEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
" a  v! T6 b1 p1 o8 uNo ham in the hamburger
! N( w; G" \' x8 _4 L) N) K$ o' `And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
9 V" X: g/ I+ n- V( d2 iFrench fries were not invented in France.
. f1 r5 _% p$ u0 N" }
) V8 P. {/ N- M8 M8 g# \3 `8 ~We sometimes take English for granted
; w6 Z, |3 o) CBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
% W3 [! ?; s( }) B2 IQuicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
# Z# a3 }# _7 `6 [And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
4 _7 X4 S; L4 W1 W5 M" B9 C) ?" L( L2 |
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
+ \6 s2 g  n+ s& x) K# V; q/ n- ZIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
$ d+ R' N* E' [; W& m; PWhy didn't the preacher praught.
5 R# q2 h% _4 `  Q6 ]( ^1 h
4 \8 a. }% B- M% e' v- C# DIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
0 M7 g- f1 Z, ^. qWhy do people recite at a play
7 t& Q" j% q4 r* \$ TYet play at a recital?
# K7 c0 |; g1 v) s9 d  L# \# H& GPark on driveways and
Drive on parkways

2 D& z3 q# c& {0 X& q% p- ZYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
& z8 c+ v# s: q4 G. M# l- G1 cIt burns down
3 I* M6 o; V7 t8 K! X8 ]( F' C! X, YAnd in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
4 n) }& C4 R" P1 ?8 zAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!

7 Y$ b; @# }: T2 t; a5 R: _% U( \1 n/ FEnglish was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
! U) K5 s6 D" k6 b0 x(Which of course isn't a race at all)

5 y* J& U, U5 X0 h! [That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
& M2 o  I/ O/ c' lBut when the lights are out they are invisible
( H2 I0 Z# L  a8 z3 ?And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
2 y6 o) k8 D$ |  U7 D! E# S5 cIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
5 G& P" f' |: W6 F" b) K, ~2 p1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
  s; R7 P% k. l6 _8 J5 \8 M% g2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
& k( T. f" R( F  t5 S8 e, c1 ^. R8 N1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
5 S: K3 M8 |  j3 ~+ R' n: G5 L  p7 |; z2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

" S) X1 x) c2 p7 }7 V$ z
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
1 q9 d/ p8 I' f2 H  n实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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