 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
8 y! y- Y1 B D+ nEnglish is a stupid language.
5 O4 j+ L0 g* s! N. X0 a+ wThere is no egg in the eggplant1 ^# U, S/ V( y4 l3 Y
No ham in the hamburger4 K& s! I( |% S6 ?8 L, A0 i
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
2 V$ U0 E3 E t$ P* B! gEnglish muffins were not invented in England
I: g2 M. [, g0 c: S; oFrench fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
# e3 v4 I% D; Y9 _: PBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
1 w5 c" H3 t G5 @4 f8 x. RQuicksand takes you down slowly
/ h+ ^# U/ b4 y6 i# j; qBoxing rings are square
0 f: c7 @( ^ g9 |And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 2 j, r7 P6 N; G3 q+ B
: E/ \. t" u% s' h" ]8 }7 q# WIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.( s) f8 a) r8 ]7 i, G9 f. @
If the plural of tooth is teeth
6 M t6 B4 [# p, UShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
0 |" t+ g R" f. q4 t4 V. T! x3 PIf the teacher taught,
8 x# S2 l7 d2 s; q7 WWhy didn't the preacher praught.9 `9 M7 j* U. p4 q _5 z
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables# \- I) B- J; w# E& B/ K; }, ]
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
) n- H0 f1 N4 WWhy do people recite at a play0 p( Y3 N! b* z/ @
Yet play at a recital?% p# k8 p. j l4 c
Park on driveways and
+ X" z" [% V. t# v; e! g5 X0 VDrive on parkways" z# L+ z" h4 j) |6 W: s
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
$ e. O, w$ J1 R' s5 NOf a language where a house can burn up as! j/ g7 E5 I6 ^* h1 D$ i) M( I
It burns down
8 L5 b9 H2 I, j: g+ vAnd in which you fill in a form
0 @6 G) x* Y; LBy filling it out
5 t- V6 h+ q- x0 }; p* x' ~% |And a bell is only heard once it goes!0 e/ X6 \6 ~( `
* a% i* h9 [* f3 VEnglish was invented by people, not computers& d; b b8 D6 f4 _0 c& t: I! p/ [
And it reflects the creativity of the human race& x9 k7 ]; B4 j8 B
(Which of course isn't a race at all)9 b3 y$ |# k" U# f" v; X# Y
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That is why
6 Y. V' I. g" RWhen the stars are out they are visible
2 ~5 f+ ~$ N+ ` f) LBut when the lights are out they are invisible" B1 p, G- ~0 [; Z
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
5 X/ x l& ^$ J% @5 y6 mIt starts
1 q* E6 N- v" vBut when I wind up this observation,
' W* o, k1 W3 ]. m! P- Y1 F1 FIt ends. |
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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