Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?: r+ m/ }) S. x) j* g# _
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Let's face it4 H; X" U' i9 I
English is a stupid language.9 A( y+ E8 R- F5 e
There is no egg in the eggplant ; z- \: X* N3 \( W3 fNo ham in the hamburger - L# K7 W4 f' T* C+ O6 rAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple." Y9 Y( T2 P4 o! {4 j6 b. u
English muffins were not invented in England1 \: b3 t2 R$ m3 @' \/ \
French fries were not invented in France. 1 y5 O8 x" e! T% z$ `& V0 G! j) v- O+ b8 W4 H. C! ^5 m
We sometimes take English for granted 7 s) G7 P9 B {- U& l8 }But if we examine its paradoxes we find that ' _: H$ d$ Z: h" f: eQuicksand takes you down slowly& }$ H7 C1 K/ m! I" h
Boxing rings are square 0 F3 ?" D0 ^7 U2 g( @And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ) c/ s$ v; J7 m- t' ]/ @
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.8 y# C/ _" H. V& r- u) T5 N
If the plural of tooth is teeth( I0 O+ D+ i3 A e, l) B- C
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth$ ~. Z4 u2 ~2 j! s
If the teacher taught, " I! \: @: Y9 f) [/ AWhy didn't the preacher praught. 3 A9 Z$ c' `% i* |( J- Z# V' ?% E" D6 t) E' [% P
If a vegetarian eats vegetables 4 A( Y" C. m& ?2 R4 X7 F# G# dWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?4 k/ ?( F. H/ _
Why do people recite at a play 5 B3 m' J5 g1 }9 T' O% N0 A" eYet play at a recital?* z+ n- a: F- V# ]8 ^
Park on driveways and . u) [4 l% m; J& g6 b3 X0 T7 ADrive on parkways % L/ X8 |8 I& ~9 z8 T: w % Z: e q. _4 j9 XYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy . }3 D, t9 ~9 [$ N. gOf a language where a house can burn up as 9 x2 h6 |# q, M. gIt burns down " ^; M$ k" X' E! c: d) }- LAnd in which you fill in a form 5 A0 t3 O7 r; k' N* {8 lBy filling it out " h* ^/ O: W& }. TAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!( p- R4 k: W3 H' t
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English was invented by people, not computers 5 w8 O& G1 V1 G& FAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race& I! B k @# r
(Which of course isn't a race at all)1 [% X5 t7 g: j7 y9 p* y
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That is why6 J9 U- R/ N4 [
When the stars are out they are visible% F* s) `/ x# B- D5 h ^
But when the lights are out they are invisible2 F$ p1 n0 K) Y6 B0 b
And why it is that when I wind up my watch4 W1 F0 v: u+ F$ D6 l6 b
It starts4 i b2 |5 s3 _! v1 D: j" u
But when I wind up this observation,) @8 n7 @% E0 j) f& T- `/ w7 I' w7 i" y
It ends.
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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