English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
- ^2 I  \" D1 }9 o" @: XThere is no egg in the eggplant
, n9 _. _! n) @& T3 Q: e) r" tNo ham in the hamburger
1 P+ y; q) y1 \5 l$ OAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
$ m) I/ X+ Q( Z' p8 |1 O" sEnglish muffins were not invented in England
/ k& ^; Q2 S, o2 ~( |( c! B' yFrench fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
1 L7 `' r' Q+ R: t& q' A" _But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
1 p" M$ v2 w. I% ~& X' n! [Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
% w+ v+ Q) e; w" m& cAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
  i  o/ V" _- {  U; a  Y) f
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
! Q$ r0 n6 y* }3 E/ F# t8 p" H* y5 _If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
& M8 H( h; t* J8 l8 dWhy didn't the preacher praught.
! _& {* |# d" g
0 d  K' D* J. Q2 N# PIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
+ l* H- i9 w) M+ [- yWhy do people recite at a play
4 g+ i4 V2 _$ TYet play at a recital?
2 ~: K" y$ [1 XPark on driveways and
Drive on parkways
/ @* s& C$ d# _7 k6 {
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
6 t/ V. [) j: P, t4 r7 XOf a language where a house can burn up as
7 f; F) p$ V1 G- mIt burns down
1 I+ W& q( A- q& r; M+ i1 E0 _And in which you fill in a form
. w. \' ~" @* X: ^$ X. d1 S" fBy filling it out
# J7 C& r) O2 v( z) h3 P7 _# pAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
7 P: z4 J7 K9 g0 |, P& s
English was invented by people, not computers
' J6 w: `. c, v/ U: g$ ]0 {" yAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
0 a7 C2 u4 \: Y/ F9 q. g(Which of course isn't a race at all)
, g( r+ Q2 s' i5 c: k
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
" k" M# s4 |' i4 h) U( g. l- Q; ABut when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
4 e& x5 v: [# t$ JIt starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
* L0 @( Q: H- u1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
$ q: l0 H. A* A2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
" _5 B" z; O% R7 \+ v& f3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
/ ~' M+ R. r) J, Z4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
* e  @' H9 j. ^* L& `4 H1 c其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
& |% T, f4 Y, R+ t! ]我看了几行,就看不下去了.
4 b+ |( Z# c; Y; ^4 Z1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
! h/ P6 e- ?1 f6 X& G5 M, Q5 _2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

* j6 e$ u- d2 t. b谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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