English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
$ {5 |7 _+ O8 f. oEnglish is a stupid language.
$ |  Y* R* x0 ~/ O2 G  HThere is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
1 t7 B5 p, \" u" M+ W: J1 tAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
2 n6 {" J! k' IEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
- C: Y5 ^- r/ d) g! a% j  Y" cQuicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
1 h" `, T" ^3 N% g! w6 y! T9 Q6 vAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
8 Q0 D* L3 \6 pWhy didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
" `/ e' }4 j! L% z$ F- m( O% @/ t5 vWhy do people recite at a play
7 ?& L1 t0 d3 ^* k# m$ ]) tYet play at a recital?
! Z& y0 ~% p, W! _Park on driveways and
2 o) Z/ ~! E0 t' {7 L& {& ^) TDrive on parkways
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! g5 f. D  p: FYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
1 Y0 T1 s: z" d) \5 v# z9 {Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
7 R7 M" A+ @1 C- w! i/ \And in which you fill in a form
) ]  F! \. s& y4 H7 iBy filling it out
/ c! _5 S: S& `And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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$ Q" \2 r: |+ K$ E9 [English was invented by people, not computers
) P9 ?5 W- g- {& L% S3 RAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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' d7 `1 K- q* u% v& `3 l+ J# gThat is why
When the stars are out they are visible
& d* ~( ^& j* y' {6 o4 M+ FBut when the lights are out they are invisible
! H8 N, O5 {$ O: Z7 YAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
3 k7 J0 Y1 g8 ^- D; ?9 `3 aIt starts
But when I wind up this observation,
! P7 J7 n1 e! d0 c) ?It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
! `/ x  A$ ^' u  i( Y: M6 G3 F) w1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
; U3 @5 C+ p4 B2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
! d$ }. \3 x' A) |: v/ ^1 b8 B. X, V- X其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
4 G4 C/ P% k$ y我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

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) z: S6 d7 ^$ B5 Y9 _# ~. n谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
+ H0 x6 D' p6 I0 N  B5 r' |实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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