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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?/ H* w5 R6 t3 [8 ]5 L
$ M3 Q* J5 V0 t% u& ^; yLet's face it+ C4 f% K: @2 M- d' I' J v, d. e0 m
English is a stupid language.
# L% j! Y2 Q- K& ~' X- p$ ^3 JThere is no egg in the eggplant) X m' c+ O( |3 f$ U
No ham in the hamburger, T, @2 ^7 @/ M' D7 S) ?( O" x, z
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.: u) m2 L2 |5 ]( A# V, H
English muffins were not invented in England
1 F+ e. x: k# k& GFrench fries were not invented in France.9 c9 r: U; C8 e/ N2 {' E
& |. l2 {9 i7 ?/ N6 M5 V+ dWe sometimes take English for granted5 x* ]8 ]3 u; [3 q- w
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that3 \) Y+ q) J) x% q
Quicksand takes you down slowly+ H' J4 h% S& ]$ V1 A. E
Boxing rings are square
. X4 e" ?+ Q- W$ E" kAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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5 w8 t9 r, W4 zIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.3 F2 w- q0 f: B. N! _+ S- U
If the plural of tooth is teeth
3 w& |- b2 R( O; |2 l: J6 Q! }* SShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
! j% g$ T' \/ C* W, {' dIf the teacher taught,
: c5 [6 ~$ \ p: _, DWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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* R5 E7 W5 ]5 F. F3 |If a vegetarian eats vegetables
0 S7 W) }; b; U# Y/ MWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?) T, Y1 m; e1 Y2 O5 M
Why do people recite at a play" t3 S( z( B( f. J$ f8 x
Yet play at a recital?
6 U, x1 A8 c$ Z, U+ dPark on driveways and
1 T& c/ U# u1 w" r; e% uDrive on parkways5 \; `! H$ {$ A! P4 r F0 z
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy0 I+ X. U% V- C! E, w: v
Of a language where a house can burn up as: B+ k' Y1 |: A+ E# O9 X
It burns down
( s- i7 c! T0 |+ I( P2 QAnd in which you fill in a form 3 f8 e+ R' a1 K, B% `
By filling it out
7 Z W) X& ^8 qAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
8 J& o+ A3 |' m: v; v+ U/ d, MAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
, o) I* l! L7 H% Y- b7 T1 g' ?(Which of course isn't a race at all)0 q' W+ r$ s6 }) e6 n$ L7 @3 y
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That is why" [9 t. ^7 ?/ @9 g+ o2 [
When the stars are out they are visible
) [4 i% ^) R4 h. l1 i; B' ]% ABut when the lights are out they are invisible: i9 d3 V- h$ O; i; z: W
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
! ^/ T0 Y9 e( K6 f7 d* D2 xIt starts
% O+ W# \4 O( u, q# x/ P; XBut when I wind up this observation,
7 ~( G/ A* e" n. w$ v6 ]7 g9 x, JIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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