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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?7 d( y+ m5 t7 z
! N4 Q/ H. s4 H$ q7 r+ e. w) TLet's face it1 y _+ T6 R- k& W. v2 b" C
English is a stupid language., g! V% _/ O. r% f. V7 y
There is no egg in the eggplant
4 ?6 a' J* T& P9 e% u' _No ham in the hamburger8 P; O7 b6 w1 {" T$ o
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
' k# o* q* e" J) j: |9 W. F$ \English muffins were not invented in England5 k" W- }" R7 S
French fries were not invented in France.
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+ S1 K) u P8 r$ QWe sometimes take English for granted- e7 [) f) @0 o, y
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
/ R$ f" Y x3 i: k5 |6 c: `Quicksand takes you down slowly7 a& N+ ?# w; U2 Q& g- ]
Boxing rings are square* i3 }7 x0 k+ K3 V4 I; y0 v; X
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 0 K4 }" b! D) q& k- |8 ~4 Y
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.5 M3 I" ? [. F
If the plural of tooth is teeth
, e* t0 E9 }! A+ C4 Q+ aShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth ~8 v$ W! U4 S: G& F/ J( T& a8 N9 s
If the teacher taught,
( b" k! [( O3 b0 ^4 }; {# V+ H: _" ^' q, VWhy didn't the preacher praught.7 ^" k0 S! f$ l$ \0 c
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables) \2 ^4 ]: r' C% I: ^# @/ z
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?4 N; M, G5 r3 H$ u4 m. h* e+ e2 P
Why do people recite at a play, K5 x* O' @. Y0 x
Yet play at a recital?
" l: i! {& p% q' [+ g1 KPark on driveways and
; u7 P6 P$ ^( V5 C# F4 ^Drive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy, r8 L' h% L d
Of a language where a house can burn up as# E9 i( ]9 g9 |* [
It burns down. r' k, p. ~9 D; P4 c/ ~- L
And in which you fill in a form
/ D, m0 D" t) E- F1 n7 ]1 i% mBy filling it out. ]/ u, a1 `" l4 S; S: I
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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( i* ~, b" J6 d, V+ nEnglish was invented by people, not computers
) g% b( U7 Q9 [$ f2 T8 MAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
7 P* h* ~, W& N2 u( x- e4 ]" N(Which of course isn't a race at all)9 I8 V1 l. R% ^; g( s
( T& {2 y( {- VThat is why" M9 G2 p3 T# f8 _
When the stars are out they are visible4 N( U' A, Y S6 A, `/ ^, {* s& |
But when the lights are out they are invisible
1 u1 W3 C( Y5 K. F; N7 S) W6 m- k2 cAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch" S4 J4 e# C5 ^6 ~0 e8 r" m4 V
It starts
' x5 @# [% L( F5 k2 eBut when I wind up this observation,# r" a4 A, k' i7 u
It ends. |
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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