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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language? J9 A/ H) m) h! T8 Z/ u% D# u
( R5 F( {: E. Y& C: j' A0 XLet's face it
) M& y! b; K! i, E2 nEnglish is a stupid language.1 v/ X0 o0 i% C: o, k2 j; X
There is no egg in the eggplant. \3 L/ W: U( v3 O* g
No ham in the hamburger
" g" }& q9 f! ?& P5 m3 ~And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.: d0 e) L. h0 I3 A( P; E% m
English muffins were not invented in England
4 x0 ?* W3 t; `* J9 s+ @7 NFrench fries were not invented in France./ O8 k& U6 F5 k" u' n) W; l
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We sometimes take English for granted, |) S! n+ x+ P7 S1 r) d+ g
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that# e& Y( ?( G0 \" d- D2 @7 C
Quicksand takes you down slowly
9 |( X$ J6 R. z& @9 k( |Boxing rings are square
4 v* |9 o4 b4 J- x/ c/ D, xAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.: S7 F* Z# }# B; l% I2 D
If the plural of tooth is teeth0 f" ?5 U( b' Y: X5 o: o% u
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth( R, @' q0 E8 ^
If the teacher taught,+ @8 n4 k: q( T% S( V& ^2 ^ ?
Why didn't the preacher praught.3 T+ ^$ u8 ]( x+ o4 n3 i2 k+ J! p
+ w, J% n; d7 oIf a vegetarian eats vegetables7 l. L4 R) T5 X- R5 K2 w8 p; g' G
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
& w8 {0 ?3 N1 \! B6 i% RWhy do people recite at a play
/ W0 e2 `" ?$ O; b- Y0 h# B' `Yet play at a recital?
0 E% ?% d6 n0 M4 j# Y9 y8 ZPark on driveways and' k# F$ |! V; ?* A. X% m
Drive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
( i5 s% k. j) x( W/ `0 GOf a language where a house can burn up as
% I3 q6 c4 D/ f; RIt burns down Y0 @- |. K' q1 ?
And in which you fill in a form - |# J. D' a7 o6 O8 L" Y9 J" M( Q9 z
By filling it out
7 L" a$ K2 R" u1 iAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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0 _# N& w# S8 ]" \- q! _5 |English was invented by people, not computers$ X# v; ~+ f3 F
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
6 C3 E4 k2 z& [1 ~(Which of course isn't a race at all), C+ W5 [ J1 e% Y
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That is why K: F& {) e4 {& _, |4 r6 ~' R* E8 B
When the stars are out they are visible
6 R- n4 ?/ B. o$ ]2 L0 XBut when the lights are out they are invisible# x& g2 Z8 O0 A* M0 O( O
And why it is that when I wind up my watch9 I: [' l7 j# ]2 Y* a
It starts
" n L# C2 F- o/ i9 ~7 {But when I wind up this observation,
' n7 q; o* R, z% j: k. F) Z# _$ ?It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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