Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?- X8 p% i$ p% C4 h* {1 Q3 X4 o+ K
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Let's face it 8 t5 j4 e+ }$ ]& E! UEnglish is a stupid language.& T. G/ W: K+ N9 F- d* g7 }* w
There is no egg in the eggplant ' m/ k& i- @5 Y" ^7 N: Y# TNo ham in the hamburger ' F3 L6 ~! Y, O7 `( dAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. % B' m# H8 T; m) qEnglish muffins were not invented in England ( `" A2 k9 L- ]' c( XFrench fries were not invented in France. , A ]' f% d$ F, N$ t2 k4 {8 R; A5 B$ _$ P+ I
We sometimes take English for granted ; n( Y2 t! P$ z8 `( F: GBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that# m+ L. y. o# ~6 ~$ }2 {# D9 u+ l
Quicksand takes you down slowly: I: u3 W7 x9 n2 u4 ~& t+ g$ s- v
Boxing rings are square 1 [4 k7 ]) d+ k( B) \/ m$ E% TAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. x. S# `) q3 T* ]+ n
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.. n9 _" x4 N# I3 c4 g" p- u
If the plural of tooth is teeth $ d/ x z2 E& m, m. a2 aShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth ) A8 {. W& o# p/ B, FIf the teacher taught,. ~# K3 f. O4 j9 E
Why didn't the preacher praught. 9 N# `. l0 X- s6 z6 V+ M/ H+ M( a. ], Q( @' f) _* B4 H( _
If a vegetarian eats vegetables+ N8 t: t/ p* n/ P! h
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?& O; e* k0 r+ T, H. N" }( z
Why do people recite at a play( C+ U. ]% Q' L% l9 T' E! h
Yet play at a recital?" I; |9 r2 |: e9 I- c! F
Park on driveways and ; O% y5 X7 C6 K! W) e8 p* LDrive on parkways ; G: ^3 Q* L9 z9 y f' z o$ K- \. D' S2 N
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy " {# d! l% q/ AOf a language where a house can burn up as% A# T1 i7 k7 O5 U
It burns down9 _2 a- P2 d/ d- D/ i$ I
And in which you fill in a form 4 C; g6 R5 P% N+ E( w8 m1 b
By filling it out3 x c$ e. S! m1 q" T
And a bell is only heard once it goes! # z; D6 e' U9 D' N+ P6 Y3 E$ M1 [
English was invented by people, not computers% \. U( V* V0 ?6 @+ R& H
And it reflects the creativity of the human race 1 T0 Q- n4 z# s9 `, Z/ o& Q$ v(Which of course isn't a race at all)% @$ _ L' Q# ]+ J
; S3 F: b' T* P+ ^: K2 j, P" ]That is why* ?4 b3 e6 }: k; D; O3 j: l
When the stars are out they are visible ; R6 y) u% ^, M& J2 MBut when the lights are out they are invisible : k3 {9 V6 t( S' WAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch 3 r7 ^( `" Y3 {7 b+ |2 c% G2 P; H: TIt starts" A% f: h( E1 L. K7 L3 J8 K3 ^
But when I wind up this observation, # U. P9 C7 [! c3 KIt ends.
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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