English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
9 z6 n; {- U* S: |( `! q8 w; `English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
( b7 z5 \: q: kAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
! w. j3 V$ y: o5 zEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
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: b4 Q4 I( ^& E% c6 V8 E: a/ sWe sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
3 {* S. Y; \5 ~. P( r  sQuicksand takes you down slowly
1 @  {4 f+ s  h4 YBoxing rings are square
" b' p; _; }$ j1 u( |! _And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
/ g1 J' P; l; K$ sIf the plural of tooth is teeth
7 [# e& v6 c3 u: W3 v$ DShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
4 {3 \  L; l& _# Y5 d& c/ x* z0 OWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
. |$ \8 }$ _6 d* A8 T( AYet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
1 I' v( q2 ^6 h5 J2 SOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
( X( Y1 U1 q0 d: \* ?2 I2 VAnd in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
& ]& l2 E8 p4 L: {! ~6 bAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!

) n3 Z5 L) K, M8 X5 EEnglish was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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  f5 A. C6 P- I- ZThat is why
When the stars are out they are visible
1 R) H. O. b- a/ CBut when the lights are out they are invisible
' j! @0 Q3 S: e& uAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
% \3 ~8 _9 y) ]  K, s) VIt starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
0 M+ V9 i4 @* X$ r0 ^* w4 x$ I2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3 T* j9 q' }; d/ r1 B/ a3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
! y: @3 O' ?4 E9 d4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
2 _  m4 t1 l" {; J5 v/ ]6 \其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
) k+ i; i) o7 f' E9 U) |8 s9 Y我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

' {+ T2 V9 o# ]" P) L9 W7 d
* L" F& ?2 y2 W2 S7 f谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
' H4 e/ Z$ G3 a( N9 }) [" ]$ A实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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