 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
+ e6 \+ M8 u* \( u/ eEnglish is a stupid language.4 i3 B {& l- A) Q" l' v# c
There is no egg in the eggplant8 g" k7 r/ [& d d9 r, ?
No ham in the hamburger3 A2 Q4 L. N5 b9 T7 p2 B* t
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple." `& U1 H5 Q1 O; g
English muffins were not invented in England7 |: ^; x- ~% ~5 J# j6 q g
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
- Q+ Z. b" N! K0 H3 G5 wBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
/ o+ ?# {+ C: s$ u3 pQuicksand takes you down slowly! y$ E% Y' N" V+ a
Boxing rings are square
1 j5 G. g+ @$ i! S+ SAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 1 ?5 w: {0 T- z9 ~) D7 ]! T
% L# d5 o8 j9 K5 w& j4 R$ rIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.3 R2 U3 P X8 N" s, _+ K
If the plural of tooth is teeth/ G$ E- l% @: O1 h9 r9 L( Y
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth# E6 I0 G8 [6 ?3 b! r3 Z% ]: |
If the teacher taught,/ D* d0 b. ~3 b/ t/ i+ t7 y+ c* J1 _
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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! ^, t$ o( I8 p' ~If a vegetarian eats vegetables7 R, w) Y8 X3 B/ Z3 y3 h
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?# V9 N8 \( f6 p) z) k& w$ L
Why do people recite at a play
% f- l& G2 i! O1 ~/ U+ x( W/ AYet play at a recital?
9 g) f: g2 x7 H7 `# ~4 M$ mPark on driveways and5 V, G6 T0 ` G4 m0 H
Drive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy0 d: R2 T' S9 C8 k& g1 g3 K8 a9 z" L
Of a language where a house can burn up as
6 O; u* c( P0 ]" ?2 n0 \It burns down
# h' @' }" e6 M4 gAnd in which you fill in a form
4 r8 ~; J" w1 Z( YBy filling it out5 E a" y. r4 R" q
And a bell is only heard once it goes!3 W* g+ x4 ?4 o! ^2 ?! x7 U7 w, z
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English was invented by people, not computers
. m/ u4 N5 a5 G3 R( cAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
/ Q5 Q9 F# i2 h% U(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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! C4 Y$ ^$ B# a; K' ?0 N$ vThat is why% E: Y! @; |! d: U* {
When the stars are out they are visible3 w6 _0 H0 y( |" ]' a
But when the lights are out they are invisible
) N, c2 t: p, W K. uAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch6 b8 l& N1 e# j" G G' ~8 E
It starts8 y( }( i/ _" p+ [
But when I wind up this observation,
) Z% f* T4 p5 R* u. V0 n$ [, vIt ends. |
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