English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
3 t+ E+ h6 f) }8 l2 P: C& I
) S8 R: \5 m4 ^4 b: ELet's face it
English is a stupid language.
0 r; o! K! H2 p( ]There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
" i* |7 A6 ?# f$ O- jFrench fries were not invented in France.
  T4 _0 G! W. l5 t
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
' h8 W' C5 i1 n, X+ Z' |, j& |% `. B& h+ MBoxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
1 b: F' d# E1 W4 J8 `
" x/ c7 D) r! m$ w6 i& [' F% RIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
' N( {9 v1 z1 j  a$ YIf the plural of tooth is teeth
9 }7 ]& n& g+ SShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
6 G/ h: X* z! s! R; t7 _6 q& hWhy didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
3 `7 M* A4 P6 P, h! \6 SWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
/ Q& D4 g6 }( F% R3 EPark on driveways and
Drive on parkways

$ L2 L4 p. f6 g6 B% P+ R5 xYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
4 f% H7 ^: Y0 P- }4 v% r# NOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
# ?' V8 `  ^8 n& Y' gAnd in which you fill in a form
! C& G% }' G; B9 CBy filling it out
# N& g. [5 ^) O  g& OAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
6 `7 S+ Q5 r* F" c2 G1 j/ `
English was invented by people, not computers
) p$ Z! N. K/ H; dAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
9 C2 n% H; E2 @(Which of course isn't a race at all)

7 Q& a7 Q2 z; v+ E" \That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
9 w3 p: d* l( I, pBut when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
$ f& s& |2 D) L7 Q; _1 pIt starts
: x. ?) T. r* q2 C3 LBut when I wind up this observation,
& l) p  d8 B- p+ kIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
- q9 q  Q5 s( F1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
9 g5 Q( F* a$ }( S9 g* B  l2 r$ a其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
& N) T% X4 N1 y* w我看了几行,就看不下去了.
# g4 i# S4 \& T* l  m! L  b1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
- [3 G: X+ d7 h4 F( E4 w, @5 X, d; e+ w2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

  a3 r" u0 b8 v- L
- ?7 v& d6 ]8 K" G6 ?谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
$ V, F3 g! R7 X1 ~2 g( O6 m" b实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下

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