 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?3 G& V' t. J! ^6 ^
& o) {5 I6 b yLet's face it" ~5 h' `+ ]# Z* W, }' h2 }4 B' S
English is a stupid language.
3 y: [4 V, P/ B% D$ iThere is no egg in the eggplant
- h6 w' s! a2 hNo ham in the hamburger
* m4 i/ z) Q" e. fAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple." `0 T+ V d# f! @) D% [
English muffins were not invented in England3 ~( x0 ]9 c: b7 D# }$ M
French fries were not invented in France.. W0 _) v. v9 `
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We sometimes take English for granted
+ [0 x! l p C6 I& EBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
" D! A) s4 {; R* R/ d' D8 MQuicksand takes you down slowly
) w# g% j$ w5 d. ^$ ~Boxing rings are square: _! _/ |4 ]& E2 X+ T" `! S
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 4 y! _6 M0 f. D; p- o
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.3 t" \: [( M: O
If the plural of tooth is teeth; D/ m7 |. X) n- E, |; ?& l
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth# B a& `( E' @. R! F% t; x
If the teacher taught,4 b& f; J3 O3 O7 v# @
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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2 l4 f) @5 {2 w& H7 @& x5 fIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
5 r. R u3 A9 _7 N) q: A- k( zWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
& E# |9 |% |, m2 E7 L3 k1 E; Q' PWhy do people recite at a play
1 u! N2 C9 ~ z7 QYet play at a recital?+ l9 h) o% L7 J) t3 ]% x% |3 ]
Park on driveways and; j9 X& P) ^( X- e, Z: c. x9 R) \" ~
Drive on parkways
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# ?: @4 I' |7 K* S. dYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy0 d8 B' E! q0 ~7 d& u& R8 i0 P7 g5 O
Of a language where a house can burn up as8 p9 H# h, i- L8 t! y- g( f
It burns down* V: Q, C: i' P' v4 ^; }0 U
And in which you fill in a form
8 k: D" f; S9 A. q2 RBy filling it out
+ J* F1 Q3 v( YAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!+ k# M# L* _4 S7 A' f
* u6 E" d; w; a; |English was invented by people, not computers
0 }5 r7 u5 I4 u1 oAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
& K4 E1 B! T# V! ]2 ~(Which of course isn't a race at all)5 d2 b# V+ }6 i( ? o
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That is why
3 `/ K; _! t4 R. ~+ f. I1 z& d: I+ wWhen the stars are out they are visible0 T& y, N7 ]! q
But when the lights are out they are invisible
9 [+ U. V; E0 k7 C' P5 @( wAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch6 {. e7 I; b. W* t6 a
It starts
6 g; G/ S+ c/ \8 M6 wBut when I wind up this observation,
( g3 q/ C8 @, P0 G4 O- {. uIt ends. |
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