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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?" w9 e( Z( c# C/ a
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Let's face it" ^$ J0 P8 Q! H
English is a stupid language.+ }% T% h3 f% F
There is no egg in the eggplant
" H8 M+ a1 e. a% X( t( v6 V; ENo ham in the hamburger
$ t+ K0 t0 i: f6 C; Z7 F, ?+ P: }And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
1 q! s& i0 |" S; d. V/ mEnglish muffins were not invented in England7 i @% b2 W6 L) y5 [8 i4 ?
French fries were not invented in France.; U5 N5 N6 E: M, A9 ]) M9 S
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We sometimes take English for granted: r7 J! d9 u. Z
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
5 i$ |! I, U* x/ wQuicksand takes you down slowly
; O/ J% L, Q9 f! W4 Z( g9 FBoxing rings are square# E! |6 T p8 L/ M
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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% D4 Y* k) X* G2 _If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
, a( D* X6 E: P ~& A9 i7 gIf the plural of tooth is teeth5 e/ Y$ I# {+ S) o; J+ W$ _" l
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth2 _% q' D; d( R5 u3 u
If the teacher taught,$ R: U0 E; j* Z5 Z6 k I, r
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
2 R1 d+ ~4 I1 A! @What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
+ k2 O4 ? p9 y5 q( ]Why do people recite at a play9 \& Y& ~* y5 Z' K/ ?
Yet play at a recital?
5 [' g6 b" z: g/ `+ PPark on driveways and
7 d9 G% {2 S' f a+ R) ^0 I# QDrive on parkways- V7 m6 Y7 W, N' H# x, A0 T" G3 {
5 M& a0 z. Y( A: @1 JYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy! ^+ ] L6 W8 [7 C, z
Of a language where a house can burn up as, V! f% b& u' y2 x; u
It burns down
5 l& m6 ~6 }, @/ `4 w. IAnd in which you fill in a form % p3 _( G4 O0 H
By filling it out4 ^; t- j5 h6 x9 s# H* \
And a bell is only heard once it goes!$ F) c4 E& ]" G
; _' i5 [' D" d/ n* Z$ ~ b9 @English was invented by people, not computers) U% }$ x& y3 ^, i& s" R
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
( `( `2 C- C, w; w/ H/ J% p8 m(Which of course isn't a race at all)- z( \6 Q# i0 [6 S; e+ L
7 r' ~/ [/ Z/ ]) _4 lThat is why/ j& u8 l) T: x; ?% Q
When the stars are out they are visible5 e9 T6 F* ?' v* ~" f
But when the lights are out they are invisible
' K" q0 J" D, l2 xAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
2 s* r0 ~* J" ^ y! m) V+ KIt starts
$ |! S2 N6 }; i' M% Y4 m$ a; \But when I wind up this observation,
7 v4 q% y' A) P. `. f) cIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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