Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?7 V) K' \, D8 @1 G$ c4 v
9 Z+ z$ G; e- N- ^Let's face it : ]6 _% l; x3 `3 jEnglish is a stupid language. 5 d3 e8 U0 x; k/ j8 R. M5 J/ L- rThere is no egg in the eggplant0 }% \( e- @# S) S% j' M( F" q% e6 ]
No ham in the hamburger; a* [8 d# ?- W! P* q8 f* Z
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.; v3 u- x- [6 M
English muffins were not invented in England p; [0 D6 v8 b7 E8 h, lFrench fries were not invented in France. 8 y+ c; R% |' q4 b* a D8 j5 w) m( @7 a; f- V0 G
We sometimes take English for granted 2 s4 k3 P0 x5 n5 h1 G0 @& PBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that ) D) E- J* y* \3 D [. } a4 vQuicksand takes you down slowly % K+ ` P& S# l6 ZBoxing rings are square , q. c1 R F) r+ zAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 9 z- S- n( i6 w1 U/ C$ m' [) I; P- @; ^; F% }. i4 O
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing. 1 k) t$ W3 G- ` ~1 W; KIf the plural of tooth is teeth 7 o# Y" d" j5 W3 A# L7 DShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth; t+ N6 I, N$ r, J- V( V/ J* h
If the teacher taught,! n" q& _& M# _4 k0 {! J* t! S
Why didn't the preacher praught. . P ^. _$ W: Y8 k* C3 ?0 Y - b% [ S+ E0 w/ M r; d VIf a vegetarian eats vegetables1 A; u; V m' x/ r0 F: [
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!? 7 o- F N/ ~; R5 v% nWhy do people recite at a play ( `" I. j4 V' G( VYet play at a recital?7 U6 |6 ^* v7 [& V6 t
Park on driveways and 8 ~& {2 y; `5 B3 @: i8 MDrive on parkways 6 v k. m0 w( Y$ T3 _. z: ?# { i0 G
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy 4 i) y3 d8 D. `7 A4 ^- sOf a language where a house can burn up as- i! k" t. f8 L3 @: r
It burns down 6 n) F# h* k+ B& _+ K+ n# H6 DAnd in which you fill in a form ! M% E& M' V) A( y7 O1 F2 o5 o
By filling it out + Y8 L) l3 ?: E: D2 c6 x: T) aAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!- X# y4 ^# b5 u# z
/ J( m# X P, e( VEnglish was invented by people, not computers 6 r) @% W/ v. @; P4 h- d* X& IAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race4 C9 X0 ~0 U$ O3 H- @/ x; q* W1 C
(Which of course isn't a race at all)0 ?, }5 H# [$ o7 [' y) k
0 N/ S5 u3 K3 Q( z1 WThat is why6 T& w/ m! k* k* ]# y+ i
When the stars are out they are visible; d4 k. v! A. T' K7 w- ?4 O1 Z
But when the lights are out they are invisible. e4 j& y/ Z' @- k% |
And why it is that when I wind up my watch 3 i" ^9 j- N' s: Q7 KIt starts2 b+ L7 O% V* s& w: c: v
But when I wind up this observation,/ \# c5 s$ r, E6 I0 ?( b, B Q
It ends.
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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