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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?: X( }5 s4 E0 }4 y7 \- L1 ?
2 Q5 Y; |, V8 b* q# w8 gLet's face it
+ C6 K8 ]" X) s! X6 X6 M* DEnglish is a stupid language.: T9 ]# D4 C# C$ e! y% w% C# O' r
There is no egg in the eggplant
7 V; j, m5 B' t& Q) f. A9 qNo ham in the hamburger
: _) n# N( c c6 |7 R$ c( ZAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.) s: C/ Z- z3 \, Y4 u1 @2 F6 N
English muffins were not invented in England
* H4 T5 G. M# V) R$ mFrench fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted2 |, p7 C! z9 o* ~. W8 j% s) E
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
/ [# c# h: C+ YQuicksand takes you down slowly- Y+ K3 ]4 W! H2 a( T
Boxing rings are square1 v( K0 j7 W5 @; Q$ [
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. * V g. B, N* |% r* f# a
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
0 b0 k% |$ K/ qIf the plural of tooth is teeth
+ s3 b4 k5 _3 i1 Q( ^/ g8 JShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
; u6 \5 I) ^+ Z, Q) G$ wIf the teacher taught,
5 c5 m! _ `' g3 W+ h6 pWhy didn't the preacher praught.- e3 d- q! {- ]! [$ l5 C! k8 a
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables8 f, d( `: |% }$ n* [& |: H
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
; A8 x+ ~4 f, h3 v8 Z: IWhy do people recite at a play. E/ f/ }( `/ ]
Yet play at a recital?
7 s' [5 \7 r6 Y5 B0 ^Park on driveways and* }/ _1 q# a* ]* g% w8 m* R& e
Drive on parkways
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' Z1 V- V5 t1 S/ W% V) aYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy# _$ B9 e7 a* e& X
Of a language where a house can burn up as
- R' [, Z7 M6 j1 C( U: cIt burns down
) X0 i# t7 h8 W& qAnd in which you fill in a form
: J( y. o! @) }% o* J7 XBy filling it out
c0 Z9 x3 `/ c3 N( VAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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( E1 d& E+ |! s" nEnglish was invented by people, not computers7 d, U' G. a2 @2 T/ L1 ~
And it reflects the creativity of the human race8 v' X6 L+ p# E: Z
(Which of course isn't a race at all)( {+ |( Q# f+ l, q1 U; a
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That is why
+ e. r& t' l5 V2 n! jWhen the stars are out they are visible
2 N% ?: x* B: K5 c$ eBut when the lights are out they are invisible6 A3 D. A. X7 |* d! n
And why it is that when I wind up my watch9 A: X, _" M8 U
It starts5 o, `9 U, n: ^3 y0 j( f
But when I wind up this observation,, J, I+ h6 R3 i1 Y+ A" d% \! b
It ends. |
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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