 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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) d* y7 ~( D& o$ r7 JLet's face it! m( C8 Q' [$ n5 x& p
English is a stupid language.
- E: U+ O1 r. H$ v3 j, BThere is no egg in the eggplant
- o! B( ~8 j* s$ Y' z3 s2 O! `; `: XNo ham in the hamburger
) c8 m2 }6 z% B# b1 f, ]! E: y% hAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
0 P( P2 g; u& w; W! c2 c3 y) PEnglish muffins were not invented in England7 r/ U' |4 j; ]9 W' ` \/ c
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
5 d K7 {9 e/ g$ TBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
0 v9 n8 ], h' ~; sQuicksand takes you down slowly2 z2 U- Z' D R1 k( ^: q: T3 h" t
Boxing rings are square
& i9 x( b3 v2 L2 ^ F3 l5 iAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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0 S. w- o l* `/ [* _9 }If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.9 i+ E& n' R8 {# q
If the plural of tooth is teeth
- u _( {9 x2 G) qShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth N% z( x( c3 V1 K% ~
If the teacher taught,- }$ P) X! s- w b' n
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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6 f! o3 L# e; a3 h3 fIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
" W- s* J# V" T. U9 qWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
7 m2 P e6 t8 K9 gWhy do people recite at a play! ^0 o* s# G* P. {1 Q1 f8 A
Yet play at a recital?
4 t4 @( Z" ~ D9 o) p nPark on driveways and! l6 M# y) j, l0 R Q" O! H) P
Drive on parkways* O9 H1 d- L0 Y& ]* G" s
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy+ p+ n; d: e5 ^3 x6 {- f) A) V( W* H, L
Of a language where a house can burn up as0 A& o' [' S3 u4 }& A
It burns down
( O# R% `/ d3 oAnd in which you fill in a form
( Q, _( j! L# U" C! XBy filling it out7 t8 i! Z7 F/ k$ t
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
+ t7 o4 u) {, p7 d8 NAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race, ~& F. C1 U) [2 W# B7 k
(Which of course isn't a race at all)3 c: J9 I [3 k
8 ?) B7 F: }0 ]$ y4 eThat is why
& U- @' D, T6 I2 WWhen the stars are out they are visible9 V& l; u; ^: w+ s4 A2 `; p
But when the lights are out they are invisible
- G, y5 Q, |9 w2 T6 W oAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch" a) U! L/ J+ Q: o( F8 K6 Q
It starts
9 p4 f/ ]4 M/ d, f/ N# X6 xBut when I wind up this observation,. w1 [& ` }4 {
It ends. |
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