English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
$ W4 ?' P& E" z. VThere is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
; Y/ g( j+ R% m9 r, ^' l: tAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
. z- R! x4 V' z: c; d& k& `0 [English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
% F6 f9 B. _6 B
7 I0 z8 F0 n3 p: k8 h  jWe sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
9 Y- G" Y0 ^! `: f( a+ S' ^( aQuicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
; D% g. N$ _, k& l# T/ u' DAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
6 A$ s# U- Z3 h. YIf the plural of tooth is teeth
$ K6 T1 y8 X2 {6 a! FShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
( z3 [7 ?+ d, {If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
8 g, {. t$ f! g
' c1 e1 p) T2 l& d3 F7 \8 m5 R8 QIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
3 k& H+ x. n0 _$ tPark on driveways and
/ o$ w3 N9 j1 s) {+ o7 E* WDrive on parkways

$ k. s( e2 I$ _7 l3 N; IYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
9 T: A) i, ~# L8 A! F, F4 jOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
( C1 G6 }! h7 e9 aBy filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
/ j4 r# A& I2 [( X( ]
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
4 _6 B1 P- C% R  Y6 S! t6 d9 dAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
2 R. J6 R* i$ [# N! BBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
8 N8 G  a# S" A1 f# N& R3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
) T& J  d% J$ p8 E' O其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
! U& d& j" U4 h9 @6 A$ o% ^7 v1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
5 G4 R9 f! D  v# I( W$ C5 O2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

) Z1 }* v) C8 f: V
) ~) Y1 H- Q: m, O0 S谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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