English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
9 W1 s  t4 _7 ]
7 \2 X: l1 V+ M' F5 f8 S  fLet's face it
English is a stupid language.
7 O: v, V+ H% B" B& q8 v" mThere is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
. e5 W% z9 n5 R0 ^2 I" b# c: ]English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
; i& ~& U* \* d
# _1 f, ~* ?# r" m4 w8 xWe sometimes take English for granted
  \  F" J9 \" ~- ]& v. kBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
8 I' ~; x% n, m& HAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
& p/ x3 A/ ]  H8 T: h+ [
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
* I: s9 U  Y2 q5 E2 p! H) [If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
1 z3 ?4 c7 |6 a6 bWhy didn't the preacher praught.
* D+ j" ^) V* R5 R. L1 U( a
, C6 V$ [' s% A. c$ R8 sIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
4 m* [7 ^8 }1 X( S  u" }. y: }1 kWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
  e* \4 y$ ]2 T! n4 u1 GYet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

4 g' i/ r5 a9 c- J- r3 g( j8 B* p/ VYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
! @+ \( a4 Y% q1 l  ~" d8 EAnd in which you fill in a form
$ `& T, I4 v( a5 x) n. k/ i' @By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
. o( ?- k" L% z0 |
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
3 `' W6 e1 j- N0 z/ S# J2 D- LBut when the lights are out they are invisible
8 f: V' \# _0 OAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
% P5 L4 c5 N3 n  L2 E' B' D8 XIt starts
2 i: m+ z8 N1 K- w) T& Q( ?But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
3 ?6 z! O. C5 F) V1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
: T1 x( m% n7 l$ \3 T2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
; D1 W% u, T  m! |其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
! Z5 h5 S/ e6 R- {) m# T" G5 s* N1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

) g0 ^5 x9 u% Y4 j- @% S/ u谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下

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