 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?6 u* ], u& J C: W7 G4 N" k4 e
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Let's face it) n" Q4 D" K& E) S+ G0 ?
English is a stupid language.9 }0 L: J# n F
There is no egg in the eggplant
. B( l# N; k* D+ I; jNo ham in the hamburger, z1 }' K5 r5 B
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.5 ~/ {3 P) h4 F7 e
English muffins were not invented in England/ a. d4 H& I! E
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted7 a6 m; Y+ G: }" Z2 y* G2 E
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that! V3 z& y( F' G/ J. z: |
Quicksand takes you down slowly
: H8 ]" V7 r& y. DBoxing rings are square
! j1 S9 w* |4 e' T% LAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
9 ?* b4 D$ B. A9 n* Z+ I k, \' ~$ d) n3 c9 A) f
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
* E5 s& [$ N5 M/ z3 ?& Y% FIf the plural of tooth is teeth. r! w0 k/ b L. L8 B
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
4 S# q% e7 V: m/ ^8 i; w$ }If the teacher taught,5 |' Z F2 V1 u" r7 }9 T+ v) P, I
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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* Z+ f$ M2 P. Z/ S3 _! w6 O/ IIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
# Y: K7 M5 R T8 KWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?0 U, K2 j- N; ^5 S. Z
Why do people recite at a play$ k8 X% z1 ^! ?. r
Yet play at a recital?+ {9 N1 I$ Y% N( X, |. p. z. f
Park on driveways and) Q2 _+ @% g" j
Drive on parkways" z9 G, _7 ^% `. F8 r! t
0 S, T, a- X" TYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
$ x/ T( X5 A4 u0 L! EOf a language where a house can burn up as
1 _8 g7 r" z" G* EIt burns down
+ h9 B5 K2 e6 A4 o, I* SAnd in which you fill in a form
6 R) P% j+ W* ~By filling it out
8 A `1 ^; Q8 [1 d0 ]And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
# i- k0 A: P; c2 XAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race! R' I7 F/ \9 {3 d
(Which of course isn't a race at all)/ H @# w' y5 a5 K
1 t- @3 o; U9 ^$ y. V* q' xThat is why
5 ], K) m* v; vWhen the stars are out they are visible3 A: w8 F' p% N# n+ \6 [
But when the lights are out they are invisible
. H0 U4 ]* D/ w# Z) TAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch+ ~- [8 [. Y6 K& _ q
It starts
0 J4 Q5 Z2 r8 J1 C) K3 vBut when I wind up this observation,! [) e( u: t4 y* ^9 Q( p
It ends. |
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