Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?' l+ H) p N; i; V5 |% J6 M. l0 ^# F
- K) x6 V; C0 {4 m+ p5 CLet's face it 8 `8 Y5 D5 @" qEnglish is a stupid language. # r$ q$ I. F$ q" VThere is no egg in the eggplant % }7 F! p( B" r$ h2 jNo ham in the hamburger * I5 L8 ^$ v, J2 _! JAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. " O3 ~% v! V: B8 eEnglish muffins were not invented in England ' a7 i2 P. ]# ~/ ~/ Z5 ^: g1 W7 FFrench fries were not invented in France.7 G X! Q9 e8 _( {. J% Q& c
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We sometimes take English for granted + k2 K8 t; O" x- ~; z8 YBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that ; t, f7 M# ^+ Q5 V' `7 m% Y0 ^5 m; iQuicksand takes you down slowly ( b$ J6 W8 K9 a; y8 a1 eBoxing rings are square 7 {' ^! k" @3 z5 FAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 7 i" {9 x8 j7 v1 [: r% c6 _/ U. g
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing. 8 a0 Z5 t/ ?8 a1 a/ J, W5 cIf the plural of tooth is teeth( g0 @& }5 u1 Z6 y8 g
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth % b' o- n( b" [6 o' B5 OIf the teacher taught, 3 i! G, g# v% B. V6 F1 ^ ~9 QWhy didn't the preacher praught. % r6 N4 ~: I1 O: t1 K+ U; Q' c& o$ h+ n9 F
If a vegetarian eats vegetables4 n4 J3 I# {) h; V; m
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?5 I5 t6 _) v/ n7 l
Why do people recite at a play + \9 n: I M) V7 j; |Yet play at a recital? # y b+ E" v" t% S, v' ^* aPark on driveways and " R& r Z( [6 E. UDrive on parkways- v( v1 T; ?; f: e2 ?% j( v/ l E0 }8 a3 h
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy + w. g6 J6 @" O! o1 FOf a language where a house can burn up as 2 L3 n" F# T0 A# ?- \8 K6 dIt burns down ; c' {, N2 n7 n3 @And in which you fill in a form 3 j- b* y- _7 Z8 X/ }By filling it out2 }+ a: L' W- M1 ~
And a bell is only heard once it goes! P3 j1 e* J/ w1 Q( g: k( @* h7 \8 _6 a; N+ V: C( _
English was invented by people, not computers \4 A5 L: J" f+ ^
And it reflects the creativity of the human race( ~7 F7 t5 H$ P8 ^* k, i' i8 }* k
(Which of course isn't a race at all)% {# @% o$ A/ J
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That is why - c% r6 {0 E! @: K w* V" BWhen the stars are out they are visible 8 Z Z/ J; m4 ^- `But when the lights are out they are invisible( M, K4 c4 V& ?& M8 m$ g! P" i
And why it is that when I wind up my watch ' x1 f' x1 q2 _+ @4 U! |2 x4 ], UIt starts+ K5 l$ k" w! E0 [ ?: {
But when I wind up this observation,/ h- V5 b$ f! S( N0 o& c+ K4 d
It ends.
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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