 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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' }+ Y+ ?7 E J6 y$ ILet's face it
, x( U* r! |" J Q0 xEnglish is a stupid language." C) d( h* M, V" x
There is no egg in the eggplant
; d# i- z: o9 z) u: _No ham in the hamburger
1 }3 X% Z& k6 l7 m: ~And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.6 Z) I, o1 U* L& c
English muffins were not invented in England
% {' f0 O/ o0 ?9 [1 J4 YFrench fries were not invented in France.( U$ c8 J9 _! K- u1 K8 ?. a
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We sometimes take English for granted
6 X# d2 d1 D. d2 |3 KBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that) ^; y4 |6 N4 k* h8 y: D
Quicksand takes you down slowly9 J/ T: _5 u) H: E5 m+ {
Boxing rings are square
8 t T7 K: \0 mAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.( z, H% l! V7 ^: N' A' a7 c; E
If the plural of tooth is teeth% K" M1 s; i% S+ r
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
( U; v# T' a! B: d9 n1 l/ MIf the teacher taught,& w( ^' U: ^4 @( i& Y8 N b: K2 D
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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/ A9 U# k i" O, z! S! t o" J! MIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
0 t$ g5 N% i p p- W7 YWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
, Y( Q" D" ]6 ^# j! f$ aWhy do people recite at a play) A0 k9 P5 g" X1 b" W- d" M
Yet play at a recital?
8 k$ e$ V" ]1 N0 J' xPark on driveways and8 u1 @! R- L1 ?" i& K' q/ F
Drive on parkways1 ?* x5 N: x+ w0 ?# m9 L: ?
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy# ?! u3 s7 ?/ d; h
Of a language where a house can burn up as% x1 W. I2 ~1 i1 k0 B) D) @6 f3 f# U
It burns down
d, }1 E% d1 c( x J7 lAnd in which you fill in a form 9 }( ~7 {- q9 a) K2 _
By filling it out
0 [2 ^* P% g5 I/ R; z9 A+ S) vAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!3 E* R% u# i; _% K8 P9 z6 J; W
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English was invented by people, not computers Z, K3 |/ M) g' y8 t: ~
And it reflects the creativity of the human race& ^$ x* m9 l: f, Z1 G) Z
(Which of course isn't a race at all)8 h3 T& j6 [- A) i6 K
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That is why
" C- h2 `9 d! l' _7 IWhen the stars are out they are visible
7 i; Q |3 m) g" VBut when the lights are out they are invisible
& @; M$ ]) o& Z+ O- W: c+ P! {4 @And why it is that when I wind up my watch
5 }( F2 I9 h" G: C4 V D# hIt starts; I' j9 l' l/ R5 L( {' i ~8 `
But when I wind up this observation,
9 i- T, R7 H y7 Z2 {; }1 PIt ends. |
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