 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it+ R- r3 t+ g3 ?# a
English is a stupid language.+ H9 I! Z: i( @# n0 t
There is no egg in the eggplant
9 _% r4 _; d/ x% m( _: k4 ?# YNo ham in the hamburger0 r, F6 R7 A$ \8 @
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
2 d7 U6 K; K. p7 |+ |" {, T' hEnglish muffins were not invented in England8 s" E( ^, e8 c8 }+ t
French fries were not invented in France.
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" g8 D2 r% n9 IWe sometimes take English for granted
' @) o6 \/ R e* \1 _But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
! b( q& B, _9 K1 E1 QQuicksand takes you down slowly
- a1 g* V- L$ \: @2 W+ h' kBoxing rings are square
+ d9 R3 j' B! j- aAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. % h; @$ a% r( j1 r" h: x) J) O
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
! y6 N% s; h0 PIf the plural of tooth is teeth
/ `1 Z4 |0 N, |! j/ a( j, M/ p8 pShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth! b4 T, Q Z% H; ~9 K
If the teacher taught,
. _2 Q+ x! h5 c; a; h$ YWhy didn't the preacher praught.5 o, \9 s# z* ]# w. g
5 `4 _. c7 D% ?1 S1 a$ u1 V# DIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
$ X4 x+ ?! A# B1 |What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
, W0 M- D F' J/ q# g l% sWhy do people recite at a play& w5 h0 l j `! j% }* E
Yet play at a recital?
- d9 Y' {' \4 B& {7 y* lPark on driveways and
" e; @/ [0 l* U0 A# O. }2 k! xDrive on parkways" [& c) S, X8 N; S
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
0 p, @+ Y" s. D) M1 r5 o$ f! B# \Of a language where a house can burn up as, v* M* R; v7 r1 ^0 F* b
It burns down
; [% {4 r, D4 j8 _( Y8 rAnd in which you fill in a form x* ]$ Q; N/ I* ^& }% ~4 C u! B
By filling it out
, @' P: W& |0 Q5 u+ \0 q5 AAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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M5 F2 W( g5 b3 ^; S$ e; k, t2 iEnglish was invented by people, not computers
. C. d# \2 C3 ~And it reflects the creativity of the human race- k' D+ H- y3 `7 n# |& t- B
(Which of course isn't a race at all)+ y# M% h0 _5 q2 w' p
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That is why& R9 ?+ l6 R; \
When the stars are out they are visible# L7 q; c6 A0 n% ~! ]) ~: G
But when the lights are out they are invisible" `+ ]' l" Y. ~5 j& F/ r: d
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
: c: H' {. }# [# pIt starts
4 [: F- E! p0 SBut when I wind up this observation,
k! @7 w K# X) t2 X7 BIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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