English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

' g8 N+ H& U4 F& N9 ALet's face it
- K4 ~. J5 z# S4 o/ D" h0 m2 GEnglish is a stupid language.
) C# e$ @+ K7 `0 r$ r" NThere is no egg in the eggplant
  _4 `! p$ }$ j9 ^No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
4 ?; @) C& l1 Z( J; ?+ fFrench fries were not invented in France.

- ^8 J$ |  n2 d0 c1 K9 K+ zWe sometimes take English for granted
/ l+ Y/ t" a9 E1 ~5 o' OBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
3 U# g5 Q+ l$ |$ b" s8 xQuicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
4 l) X, h: l5 c+ k/ a& N5 eAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
' J: _. S/ B5 u; b1 rShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
& c/ g) z2 m$ aIf the teacher taught,
3 ^! o! ?+ O) H, {8 ]Why didn't the preacher praught.
" t9 s9 t+ p" f% ~" e! u
/ W6 |) f$ @$ f% c% b' bIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
3 A/ Y" a1 V$ \" ^0 K# QWhy do people recite at a play
8 d" f1 U  a6 E* A% Q! XYet play at a recital?
& a3 s3 y0 g7 J% f* NPark on driveways and
Drive on parkways

9 O; T0 A# D5 f1 O8 b; }You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
) w' _( N6 o0 KIt burns down
1 N7 Q: ]7 H1 v0 rAnd in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

; Z! v8 t2 `$ I0 V" zEnglish was invented by people, not computers
+ }8 x0 h2 U: _, y2 }# A: `0 dAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

# g2 E/ k0 ?2 w0 s* EThat is why
When the stars are out they are visible
- U8 h( G4 m4 M8 T- v" I8 r4 Y0 XBut when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
% ~# O, ?8 b# c3 t0 G3 ?But when I wind up this observation,
! a5 d% q" `" P5 B* _# oIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
2 u1 G$ ?1 t) q  w( r4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
  R: Z; l) l4 I其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

! a* _, x, c- y, y+ F
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

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