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English language

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?1 {0 M& I- c2 J! d

, g0 W# J# `- l* P% t. d% T& hLet's face it& F2 Y$ U( B: j' u9 q- ^
English is a stupid language.
; U2 z  C5 t. B3 i" GThere is no egg in the eggplant' h# V4 X7 _7 s7 `  `/ \  \( Z
No ham in the hamburger
, j% i7 C% z6 k. T7 {/ gAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.! S3 W9 n# S( T8 z  t  b- b
English muffins were not invented in England
0 p. v( O1 x) C. HFrench fries were not invented in France.% V/ a8 h* x, B8 L& K; V% o

$ G/ H( \% b  o& [8 fWe sometimes take English for granted
9 J* `0 z" E( VBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
8 ], V8 h0 i5 y4 P- r, T/ WQuicksand takes you down slowly* l8 K. ^2 l1 K. b
Boxing rings are square1 v4 @$ ^" U$ q  s$ n
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. , F+ U4 ~+ E# n' o
, z+ e7 U4 X# D) k& A: u
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.5 j. Q- q# ~/ V8 |# }
If the plural of tooth is teeth
3 W  W: {$ s* iShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth7 w/ X+ t$ k, M& d% Z
If the teacher taught,
: K. n# U& g& U) aWhy didn't the preacher praught.
( s1 b2 ]1 W; Y( A1 z/ `
0 ]2 ?0 V- b$ Y6 EIf a vegetarian eats vegetables" ?) y5 ~5 f& q' g$ x- p) A
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
5 U% r! ^1 p9 u) ?' C# P  UWhy do people recite at a play. S) @5 }; j+ s( f
Yet play at a recital?. i* z1 Z1 b4 [3 _) V) }( Y
Park on driveways and
, N% i7 q4 Y- v* d, p1 M7 o6 RDrive on parkways4 c6 Q/ S% w5 A% x
' j( s8 O( B% _; a% X
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
4 T9 x& o# q+ }. Q! iOf a language where a house can burn up as5 {4 J3 [) e  Z9 X& ?' e! _
It burns down: ~, P6 P- i9 m6 z! _
And in which you fill in a form
3 r* z+ r0 N& j. o8 {2 M  c* RBy filling it out
% K7 ?6 {6 b) y3 m' _6 b; V6 r5 [And a bell is only heard once it goes!2 l4 d/ y( x+ W+ c. ^6 ~. E+ ~# s5 |1 c

* g7 p6 ]2 c7 L- u/ x5 E0 p( qEnglish was invented by people, not computers
' z& h1 d% X- g6 q! j% V' V4 YAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
" L# l4 D( g1 S(Which of course isn't a race at all)
5 ]" t) X* d- x. e5 m1 T  I7 A2 Y; ~  c
That is why, u) C$ e8 ^; V
When the stars are out they are visible
" R6 {, c4 q: G5 kBut when the lights are out they are invisible- Z% |9 S2 v  y' E: C0 q+ z6 x
And why it is that when I wind up my watch% F4 ], X) z% P+ W# k1 F
It starts
% d+ @8 U5 K6 N( Q$ b/ ?+ G3 ]" S6 PBut when I wind up this observation,
+ }0 O) ?$ g& \4 A+ eIt ends.
大型搬家
鲜花(78) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 18:40 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
鲜花(143) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:08 | 显示全部楼层

典型的中国人写出的E文.该文写的非常差

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
6 V4 K  i' g% I" @/ ]- O7 w" j  Q1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.$ B0 {, V( ?' z
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
7 @# Z* ^/ w! ]0 T9 B$ N6 T3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.6 q" _( `2 P% O: A: ~# V
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
5 [7 t# W: N" F  @其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.
鲜花(143) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:20 | 显示全部楼层

而且就E文本身而言

老杨团队 追求完美
应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-28 12:24 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-28 16:13 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表 + |" p. a5 `8 [# ], J
我看了几行,就看不下去了.* s! h, W1 K: S5 l
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
  U  U+ E' h0 M) L3 ]* Y# o2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

8 ?7 j3 M" @! G( F" w% t1 J5 y! k1 k2 H
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢?
$ K! v3 D& Q5 F3 e( [实话讲,这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
能写出此文的人,一定是深得英文精髓。幽默,有趣。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-12 18:54 | 显示全部楼层
我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗?如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-20 16:07 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-30 05:33 | 显示全部楼层

民工

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
说得不错,有收获,顶一下0 D! A8 h2 k. j+ I- E. `1 E

% w1 d' F0 p6 P4 c) N; h
9 ^/ P  ?7 ]+ j( a  一民工大便不通去医院作检查,医生检查后给此人开了一个药方,民工到取药处一看是一卷手纸,不解,医生说:以后不要再用水泥袋擦屁股了!# g2 V, M! a1 r) k

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