Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language? # g5 ^# i: O/ l* G, j4 ?0 I 5 F. Y! A ^& h; I3 ZLet's face it 6 i6 s" b; h8 AEnglish is a stupid language. " C8 _, E: O8 t8 U- @1 v7 gThere is no egg in the eggplant 0 i+ ]% J% C( KNo ham in the hamburger 1 P9 O- o7 `- u7 I/ `3 oAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.9 s! g" s8 ^ U( g2 z
English muffins were not invented in England/ `/ V+ k& x3 W9 D
French fries were not invented in France.4 a- E/ I/ f' ^- _3 h$ D
% c4 D0 c9 F: ^We sometimes take English for granted& i# A3 v) A( ?7 |
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that) o. o- u6 X9 e( T9 A% i
Quicksand takes you down slowly 9 i) Z1 }- K4 [) r' W0 `1 A7 ]# F. n$ @) {Boxing rings are square " ^4 k. f8 M/ R' v9 RAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ( t: q1 Z) b1 e% \1 `
; [9 g' f' X' k- C) QIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.. d% M& w9 x/ A0 k3 g: D
If the plural of tooth is teeth 8 T" _4 A/ M& `3 O/ o5 \# oShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth 3 b9 S: a i% H( D2 [, kIf the teacher taught, 3 R& _8 e- g: O' ?/ g+ }% uWhy didn't the preacher praught.4 ?& R b/ O! w8 k6 Z" b8 c
- e; _$ ^" X6 z5 m* M3 Q5 _8 G
If a vegetarian eats vegetables # ^7 D; Z( @ Y3 p4 j0 MWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?6 [ c5 q0 ?1 X% l9 B% J* \+ d
Why do people recite at a play) W+ Y7 C& ~0 q/ z
Yet play at a recital?6 i6 i) J" x. `4 M6 k
Park on driveways and! T5 r. q1 o* D2 K+ y
Drive on parkways / G+ f+ [: Z; _4 J f" a' C1 {$ t + ^' Y# W( s2 s M' x* ^You have to marvel at the unique lunacy 2 g& q' u6 a* F! |/ o+ jOf a language where a house can burn up as7 T9 p# _) ~- O6 ]+ r! h' a
It burns down9 S$ U& }: Z6 @' j5 z5 t3 f9 ]
And in which you fill in a form ' K0 R$ g% C9 c @By filling it out b" g' V& u4 s1 b+ SAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!0 Y. d" X- A' m2 |
{1 N7 {, p+ a9 S0 Y+ S& wEnglish was invented by people, not computers ' R" \% G9 ?: fAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race1 M- x# p4 o" @
(Which of course isn't a race at all) / k l* b" O6 H2 p! J; s8 n + l6 C1 h: o* r2 `* T1 j1 d! DThat is why / L; M2 J1 ~/ Q1 E( [When the stars are out they are visible6 S* c! h* P% y
But when the lights are out they are invisible* g( V* I: p+ n/ M7 U' H
And why it is that when I wind up my watch 2 I2 I/ ?2 a$ s* I- ZIt starts ; o; H+ ]5 k q+ Z9 e" M! CBut when I wind up this observation,& u/ I: g- {$ x3 `, M, s
It ends.
说得不错，有收获，顶一下 3 ~, }$ V( m. M. Y& }* E; ^ # m+ i+ W) L( Z0 F0 D3 _) A, t ; ]/ V- p2 m3 D 一民工大便不通去医院作检查，医生检查后给此人开了一个药方，民工到取药处一看是一卷手纸，不解，医生说：以后不要再用水泥袋擦屁股了！ 3 E L2 I( Y$ U" ~ 0 b# U2 b S$ w g 1 D% u9 _& f9 M& c-------------------------1 w1 `& V; I9 M' v: ?2 G, J
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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