 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
0 K- g% `/ y6 F$ D3 PEnglish is a stupid language.7 n( N2 h1 L0 C$ ^8 i! p B
There is no egg in the eggplant& ~6 N+ V/ U6 p6 _
No ham in the hamburger
+ M+ s w4 I8 ^6 I7 _4 OAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
6 H$ b: r( S1 j2 ?, ]English muffins were not invented in England8 t4 Y: y" I/ ~9 ]+ O4 ]1 }6 J
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
2 S) f; g* D: a' J5 `! F" bBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
! v. q' x% h0 _& ?" p# yQuicksand takes you down slowly$ s D7 O- q# \/ f! R
Boxing rings are square
% o5 F" b4 {8 ` M1 vAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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$ c, d' R8 u6 ?& e9 @If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
( V0 @- n% Y8 B0 I7 w. H0 UIf the plural of tooth is teeth
; A$ T+ T9 ?/ O2 T9 F2 a& i' pShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth, f1 B; _0 M/ X; l2 V8 l0 S4 _
If the teacher taught,
/ l! R. x4 Z5 Z" g. qWhy didn't the preacher praught.. y+ v4 m/ O* }. t9 Z* S& K/ N
1 z: H1 r! A, U# a% Y9 iIf a vegetarian eats vegetables: Z. ?! j% d- z9 W y
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
& G8 H$ ]% N/ I5 C3 o8 EWhy do people recite at a play5 {+ T2 E0 X! b0 s7 d6 V
Yet play at a recital?
/ @& a2 `8 @( w# Z7 V% P% `Park on driveways and) T. b j# v! o3 ?9 Z
Drive on parkways+ P+ O$ i, Z2 @ H% q1 j
; x5 V# |& D, Z6 z1 N# G$ WYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
. S, `3 @' O- i& T8 P7 VOf a language where a house can burn up as
0 j$ f A5 a7 k7 U$ e4 p# I2 zIt burns down
1 G: U) C# }* X9 i8 {And in which you fill in a form
# a8 \, @6 Z/ d! R9 w$ k! nBy filling it out |! J! ?8 @9 u- |% _
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers, G; n1 S4 b$ L L1 F
And it reflects the creativity of the human race* h" H& s* e# ^- S/ p
(Which of course isn't a race at all)( G% M2 ]" ^- o. ]" ^; G6 C. a
9 U! @$ ~: ^& n" I5 YThat is why
c# A, J0 ~6 u! G5 rWhen the stars are out they are visible
3 A: M6 [7 ~* O, d' b tBut when the lights are out they are invisible
; v% `6 w% a3 [: b3 p7 t) nAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch8 H% E% R1 y+ S& B3 q
It starts
; w/ \6 ~& G4 t# R% cBut when I wind up this observation,6 U7 k9 O. j" ^- `7 U
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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