 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?2 A& @: R' S$ z/ v: U h: E
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Let's face it
: C0 u* B2 C. rEnglish is a stupid language.8 A- i6 p, s! l' h4 I
There is no egg in the eggplant) i1 e6 T; v- Z( q4 J
No ham in the hamburger t+ [% n) P4 H& o7 k
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.; \/ v4 k6 i# A" p
English muffins were not invented in England
. W0 f! s, y* `0 H+ f- YFrench fries were not invented in France.& M# m" U& w4 k! ~
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We sometimes take English for granted. I" U' A3 B; M. ?; }; L+ y
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
. h8 w5 W) x9 XQuicksand takes you down slowly
4 d6 J3 M8 |; X! ^) x. A0 PBoxing rings are square
{% F, r* z" e ~0 cAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ; e$ r, |/ y M: ^# X @- ~
2 K' {% M3 Y! {. k; K- }" aIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
* c( |: I! r& NIf the plural of tooth is teeth
. e6 T1 |4 a: ~! ?& f' E! qShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth% v. Y, n) ^0 ]/ W' e3 `
If the teacher taught,
' ~$ A6 L2 J( |3 r5 X4 [Why didn't the preacher praught.. f7 W" w" b; ^/ L# R
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables- k) _2 \' I7 [
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?; H( z' v2 ?9 [# }" I1 i( w! [
Why do people recite at a play5 T9 k) O1 A3 d. ?
Yet play at a recital? u& V- G: R6 i8 p5 H
Park on driveways and% |5 I# g( C+ Q: z
Drive on parkways0 y, c4 y" s1 }% t# W9 u
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy; u' v0 K( l, A0 ^$ J9 ]
Of a language where a house can burn up as% Y3 m; n% c- @8 ^' g% H+ n u
It burns down3 X9 n' V+ U4 u! J8 c2 o
And in which you fill in a form
1 A1 Q. R, v0 R: T+ TBy filling it out
# S8 c) U# M& l2 H8 DAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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4 @1 I, B& V# J: TEnglish was invented by people, not computers' V: G4 |3 D' N8 \
And it reflects the creativity of the human race, r _" I% `$ j
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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' T9 S; t6 c3 |& M9 F5 y! v. J5 CThat is why8 S8 \- J; b8 h: w/ w+ n. i
When the stars are out they are visible6 g, v; J" Y: {# O* o3 E
But when the lights are out they are invisible2 M: I4 u( L5 Q' H1 ]( ~
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
8 O3 ~8 h* @5 q+ G+ N( e- a2 pIt starts% S# c4 u" @* Q) p' Y1 O
But when I wind up this observation,7 J3 q+ |' [5 `
It ends. |
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