English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
  }5 j  H. C- s8 K3 b- vEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
/ H0 z- W9 a: e3 S3 G  l  WNo ham in the hamburger
( G$ Q4 U! L1 t# ?# `And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
1 U8 G. c6 j2 Z" mBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
. J; u3 u7 U( G- a$ E1 l( ~If the plural of tooth is teeth
2 ^+ W; ~) r! q# eShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
) o! Q4 Y8 O  U' MWhy didn't the preacher praught.

2 M0 _/ f* h9 }+ n8 [If a vegetarian eats vegetables
; o6 n. a; R. `0 c; N: _What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
' x6 u$ J7 U  k& |% F" vYet play at a recital?
' K+ f$ G; b1 G9 @  ~# \7 p" YPark on driveways and
+ m, u' t9 O/ q% b3 |/ }Drive on parkways

1 }% O  b9 ?% T, ^/ b; `+ x; P* iYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
' w. @/ X' g9 C( h- E; r0 VIt burns down
And in which you fill in a form
) S( `& M6 a) a& l$ I4 ABy filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
+ @+ S7 W2 J' _- i- c- C6 oAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
4 E- P2 G. l6 s; ?+ u( W0 Y" f, d4 X, T(Which of course isn't a race at all)
# [( `0 j: A1 F% ^: ^+ `
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
$ \7 U; @, b) X8 s* B' _But when the lights are out they are invisible
; N* T% W, ]$ ^: Y3 M) W! i. hAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
9 a9 j6 {. f6 n4 H+ p% XIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
: P9 w& d( t# K$ `, z) N2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
- S4 x1 g- M% M4 i# m4 r* A3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
  S" j) J6 J& {6 u1 I+ a7 a" p1 R2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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沃索拉呐

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