 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?. m6 G7 H0 {' O
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Let's face it+ w8 m, G! h' {5 `0 {" ]& s
English is a stupid language.8 A& P, b+ u' @8 i' t' z" {
There is no egg in the eggplant
7 H9 H' S' W8 o# C6 j1 a% B: Z( XNo ham in the hamburger/ q# K/ x: N8 n( e6 q, F
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.! V+ w/ u& F& N6 M- k- X
English muffins were not invented in England1 l& w6 s- Q* W4 e+ O/ R
French fries were not invented in France.) ]0 C' U- B, z! ?. Y' o
' ]$ r/ g- |/ `6 m. O5 r/ ~/ s7 ?We sometimes take English for granted* F3 B/ A# a5 x$ r) P
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
) U* B& s! _0 d1 uQuicksand takes you down slowly0 f8 h$ H! I0 M+ o" N
Boxing rings are square
3 |9 j4 V' B& z9 ~And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 0 M( l5 n2 {" ~0 Y4 W' a& i
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.1 J, x1 \* a1 ]& }- L1 x
If the plural of tooth is teeth
5 n& p1 h% K- C1 d( Z; G9 YShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth' z# A8 k5 Q# h$ w8 W3 j
If the teacher taught,
: B4 ~; |# x" |1 KWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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; b" M( O% g5 v* A* ^, F: n3 i. L6 SIf a vegetarian eats vegetables8 }- D1 Z$ f8 `! W
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
. p* a: ^( d" xWhy do people recite at a play- o! g6 ? E9 K; K6 m
Yet play at a recital?2 i, h9 v1 o _+ Z* }+ v- K: P. ~
Park on driveways and
( M' r, W( B0 O; u, GDrive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy5 Z, ?/ X; B$ P5 x) ^
Of a language where a house can burn up as
2 Y) k% ], n2 g- x6 l9 i3 _/ BIt burns down! V+ M4 A0 p) k! H U B L& a7 [
And in which you fill in a form ' L2 a4 t; T4 c, C9 z
By filling it out' \1 W: u. T; m t
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
V' L2 ~6 ~ R! f1 oAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race* l# k4 U4 a) z' S- @
(Which of course isn't a race at all)) V* O7 l) L- } u$ z
a" B: Y! D# O% p9 O( b& X4 MThat is why) V" p; [$ K+ N; h8 o( j
When the stars are out they are visible3 ] [5 E$ ]8 F4 _) \
But when the lights are out they are invisible2 r) }% K/ c& F9 s
And why it is that when I wind up my watch5 v" v3 a3 X: z) s; i) d
It starts
! Y6 d2 t1 f9 f9 ZBut when I wind up this observation,6 P7 d: [) d0 Z; s5 W: F. F
It ends. |
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