Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language? ; q! e0 b9 I! z: R0 }' G' t1 Z3 s$ |
Let's face it7 e) o2 H7 N4 x8 ?! e
English is a stupid language.6 T; Z* X6 G4 o7 H: s( b% }
There is no egg in the eggplant ) y: X/ t$ b- S/ V" |; bNo ham in the hamburger. Y7 @: m9 ?: v% e: E( D e0 N
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. 4 X! e* U3 }" e9 w7 q8 FEnglish muffins were not invented in England : f4 a) Q& h, |: c, y& k. P$ tFrench fries were not invented in France.+ r4 m# o, g! M' \0 }
3 C9 M. |( H, C2 ~$ ]We sometimes take English for granted ' q" _* W/ P( t5 G. H4 XBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that6 T# j' C- ]) O1 p4 K$ g
Quicksand takes you down slowly ) v9 M" d Z4 B3 vBoxing rings are square ' x8 m) ~7 |+ t4 {And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ! h8 N, V3 r6 |& P
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing./ t3 S1 y* |( e3 M
If the plural of tooth is teeth 0 x# A! N* b5 g& yShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth3 [, b# O0 [1 Y4 y6 }- f# O
If the teacher taught, 1 I. }* I( C3 @Why didn't the preacher praught. & q. J: j) I$ ?- a% ?; [ ; K. V8 ^" ^1 z$ Q' q0 D; M/ K. t1 d8 L# oIf a vegetarian eats vegetables 2 X/ ^# g- n% tWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?) {; D$ X3 h6 L- u7 `9 P; e) |; M
Why do people recite at a play$ _: t2 K7 h& ?# _' }6 p: Z: m
Yet play at a recital?8 |7 N! @4 \- m
Park on driveways and ' n; q- `% s0 ], A ODrive on parkways 1 r. h9 o+ A6 f; n- d* Q& ?+ D( E1 d n1 `/ z) X% T
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy) [2 l( L9 `. G m
Of a language where a house can burn up as; c( k% \) \. L& s0 I
It burns down* q* X t& R: ^! g& ?! q' W
And in which you fill in a form ! H& Q% p0 h6 T; q2 P ^By filling it out v, `2 j* h W9 L& | {& M5 h3 BAnd a bell is only heard once it goes! 6 T7 ?% e, A4 \/ W$ W8 D( o# d: {& V& {2 d. i4 Y3 s c! ?: E
English was invented by people, not computers$ l4 o- B* e+ z6 S
And it reflects the creativity of the human race / P' A: Q G/ P# M( h- W(Which of course isn't a race at all)2 c" |+ C* V" G: Y- A a
& v; S7 b, l0 K% ^% lThat is why# B6 v( K7 s# B5 T3 H+ I. a) Q
When the stars are out they are visible3 }! f! k7 c6 q$ p: M# F
But when the lights are out they are invisible % |6 w7 X! V- X, q; LAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch ! D9 ]! D9 {% B) mIt starts ' K+ Q8 F1 M4 aBut when I wind up this observation, 9 \' r" o l8 b0 C+ {It ends.
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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