Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?1 J4 k+ B% V; j
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Let's face it# L5 f. I' v. c3 q' I
English is a stupid language. 6 s; ~/ ?% J+ Z" {# sThere is no egg in the eggplant: w$ N: }# X7 W6 F5 F. b9 x
No ham in the hamburger9 q1 ^1 A9 ?8 D" E& f8 F2 X' d
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.& Y7 a* k0 W p# s6 W* @
English muffins were not invented in England: R% H+ e0 @8 \0 i- L' V7 Y
French fries were not invented in France.0 z0 w7 t6 w7 `; ?8 N
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We sometimes take English for granted & H" [+ m. W' O1 XBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that' p8 Y# }. E/ H1 B- W2 M5 S
Quicksand takes you down slowly . B- Q" r9 O9 c0 Q# |Boxing rings are square ) m' B; m6 ~' s, d# FAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 0 ~* a) R4 P2 |2 K3 K2 A9 n
' E) ~! U3 w- K* u9 [; i QIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.9 \: I) b" z8 @/ U0 Y. z
If the plural of tooth is teeth ' R; q$ H' S8 g( ]( `6 v9 y: kShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth % T' Y) G2 n: Y" vIf the teacher taught,6 I5 s' v4 D; G2 g* _
Why didn't the preacher praught.) u3 O( b. G3 R8 J- X0 N% T
% d' `8 b( m" f- aIf a vegetarian eats vegetables0 Q* h# e$ l6 @7 A2 u% G9 g7 p. f
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?, a: ?; K. ]2 g- I
Why do people recite at a play+ T8 M0 d2 v1 ?, c
Yet play at a recital? / V( \/ ~3 H5 y' lPark on driveways and4 }: U$ ?1 c0 }2 U5 S" f- p
Drive on parkways) I; p+ e8 q5 F0 m: ?: A
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy d( n) t1 U9 [5 \/ VOf a language where a house can burn up as& N/ c3 h* s4 T% j
It burns down : |8 S; z+ \+ F" m. k S' H. S% UAnd in which you fill in a form 2 @* \: d% @. U3 f+ R0 K7 a- X
By filling it out+ L/ b: x1 G* I
And a bell is only heard once it goes! ! W8 f1 `1 j S0 [! a8 j. f7 E* }( R$ W A
English was invented by people, not computers $ x! U6 ?% B: |+ WAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race7 g! E( [. s9 P
(Which of course isn't a race at all) : v) n# t; I0 g8 l( ~! }( a; B- j) x: y9 K6 X! b( l
That is why. A: S1 m' W& \5 N: e1 D
When the stars are out they are visible 9 i7 r, W Q8 l" p5 `But when the lights are out they are invisible, D8 g1 r3 h8 |0 g, f1 F- M
And why it is that when I wind up my watch 2 S9 n% _$ s- \; s/ e4 c8 o* VIt starts) Z5 L7 Q, B; Q P
But when I wind up this observation, 8 J& b6 b" V3 J f( }% w% z( JIt ends.
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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