 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?; n0 ?+ T! e& L z u/ }) ~. V
* t- j% r4 f+ CLet's face it( L+ M$ A' @) \9 X$ G5 g- \
English is a stupid language.
6 y* X9 ~5 T' f2 O! CThere is no egg in the eggplant& l- r: e: @/ j0 X8 o& y% x
No ham in the hamburger" w y9 K) n% n- U9 _, g5 f& q4 f
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
, ]' I+ O* s, [1 t& y w. w$ ?6 b. rEnglish muffins were not invented in England5 F0 T2 k' c1 X- `
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted8 D, ^/ S2 @/ `+ \2 P5 ]
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that; D2 x0 [$ T# s2 F9 k8 W
Quicksand takes you down slowly$ I* |2 R; N- M0 Q9 V# g8 u( I
Boxing rings are square
- S$ l- p% ~+ y$ {7 ^And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 1 g1 ~9 }, R3 Z2 |
- {6 m- h$ B; q( T& _If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
3 Y" g9 Q$ X6 R- rIf the plural of tooth is teeth& c. X, b" ~* l8 T' t8 ~- n+ T
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
% A$ `/ b6 e' H9 F, NIf the teacher taught,; G6 K: P4 W) a$ `
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
6 {7 n- K( w& a. Z: @What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?4 a5 J) f% u! [. t
Why do people recite at a play% \7 }- s% M8 @4 g, Y# q. E3 X
Yet play at a recital?
2 G( `. I" ]% L) |- u1 t3 `# rPark on driveways and
& [' u& I& F8 YDrive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy; @' o4 D5 C E D, S$ Q$ N% w+ C
Of a language where a house can burn up as
& o$ B$ z! y# C$ M% ^& l9 R& BIt burns down
Z! S8 p. ^: |8 b4 ]( Z. J( DAnd in which you fill in a form . J: i$ Y d" C+ L8 G6 ~+ B
By filling it out, z$ P, a2 G! q l) j& C
And a bell is only heard once it goes!; X; N' t2 D$ l$ N& a" c6 _
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English was invented by people, not computers9 v( S4 d3 S0 W6 I: \4 E0 s' n9 D3 {
And it reflects the creativity of the human race- _. ]/ r5 ?; ^4 e
(Which of course isn't a race at all)/ E5 Z) E8 ?: j" k
. ?1 @) f1 O) d: ?8 [8 V E" hThat is why
' M; M0 N% Q% _5 G! TWhen the stars are out they are visible
9 D' r; V6 m6 U+ O& g: _ IBut when the lights are out they are invisible. u9 q. E+ Q5 t9 z: F/ E
And why it is that when I wind up my watch' c# p. v& c- Y& j1 R2 y
It starts
& m) b7 b5 [5 W- l. E B3 GBut when I wind up this observation,+ e$ ]6 f5 ?" d
It ends. |
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