English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
1 g, X) Y+ n/ @# Q0 tThere is no egg in the eggplant
: ^& c1 a! G* O! TNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
+ a8 z/ f, Z: |: I3 v6 zEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
; x; j0 M7 f6 y: U8 B
- S5 {5 v! ^* ^We sometimes take English for granted
0 a0 d% \. w3 \9 wBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
( `8 Z  d8 E' N! o/ `; W( l( C" pBoxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
2 q7 i. t0 V. p7 ^
5 `  Z) D; \2 \3 j* T# c* cIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
$ f0 j3 G' c$ m4 l/ o. y- P" RIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

3 Z' _- V, c% ]# X5 m( qIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
8 c  j6 |; @" T# \* _" vYet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
. C# g$ A1 E8 u) m5 [; B
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
1 X& Y0 ^1 v6 vOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
. B; k% V/ b# A7 L$ U7 H. a) T. q; SAnd in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
( S$ }4 |  p# F  P+ lAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
3 F2 T; I: `0 o3 k0 B
4 `% W! E/ f  A! `English was invented by people, not computers
7 N% S1 c$ m' V& ^6 P# ^7 CAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
6 n; L+ k3 m0 o( k(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
/ p' [. b3 _7 ~2 a. L/ |% RWhen the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
, M/ X/ L& F6 c$ tBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
& n' T5 _2 u+ f3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
9 r+ [$ f2 ]; `2 C% `我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

% ?5 `  N. E1 ~4 E5 j) L7 O
% \: X' j8 o9 C- }2 f3 ~谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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沃索拉呐

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