 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?' {. K2 y" o# _. D( `
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Let's face it& ~; Z0 U f( |: z$ Y9 u
English is a stupid language.' Q1 L a% }, s
There is no egg in the eggplant6 D. q. K! Q* V% l3 I; i% Z
No ham in the hamburger
- _4 S) J$ F' ]' d8 ^And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
- `' q- G5 Y! @$ k/ l/ k; b4 GEnglish muffins were not invented in England& E* @$ c: K. E! q5 f2 o
French fries were not invented in France.
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, w k6 h4 M r3 u& }# @We sometimes take English for granted, g/ m, B* Q) L T6 \5 Z' S
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
! f5 e. b. U$ X, j3 I3 wQuicksand takes you down slowly& V7 c* p7 s8 M! a. V
Boxing rings are square
; M9 I* `6 M& ~, U5 OAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 2 M# D( c, q/ U9 D2 H, O Q
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
1 F% G# K! T! Y2 y- `( WIf the plural of tooth is teeth
1 R, {. u( F2 wShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
9 |: o" B/ p, W+ GIf the teacher taught,! n& m6 b2 A/ [9 r- c
Why didn't the preacher praught.- _3 @5 @5 v8 n H& ]$ i
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables8 A1 S' A! i# Y+ N9 \3 Q/ w6 T
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?7 l) c. H- H% m, r( l/ H2 s, t- {
Why do people recite at a play) j( s; I0 d7 S" E1 R
Yet play at a recital?
$ p9 P6 a( I( l# @! H4 s7 iPark on driveways and, g/ x& h* N! \7 \* C t
Drive on parkways4 h: m( h# T( W5 `8 W. y
6 i9 }$ k! v9 v- e6 M' l' pYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy, |5 N3 l, r Q$ ?
Of a language where a house can burn up as% c) X7 Q5 Q5 o, D
It burns down; ?, |' y& v1 i- v- _& ]- C
And in which you fill in a form
, n2 k5 n$ d$ e0 r, m2 eBy filling it out3 S" v! }8 E, B
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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7 b8 m' B7 T4 \ YEnglish was invented by people, not computers
" g2 @% I7 C& P2 J1 A/ e5 U; wAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
4 H( o& J; b8 v+ e(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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2 q0 D& ?7 m* g3 zThat is why
. z- G- [+ a L( {) ~; `5 t: [# GWhen the stars are out they are visible
2 ~; k; G" N: h3 _6 d* y4 z# VBut when the lights are out they are invisible5 {4 Q% ~+ `4 f$ d. I [* _
And why it is that when I wind up my watch/ B7 ~* S3 G) P; F1 P2 Y
It starts; M6 z* H0 n' O5 h- v) r
But when I wind up this observation,
$ d: ~4 J) O3 aIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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