Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language? 0 t& e1 e& ~) t7 T- O 2 i( Z( X6 `1 D9 ]* B1 v2 H) `Let's face it* {: L4 j l- W
English is a stupid language.: v1 i5 o3 z9 J* `
There is no egg in the eggplant. [$ P+ P U! P! E9 N' u
No ham in the hamburger& m$ Q- }+ m9 ~) ]2 d
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. 8 C u& S5 W9 U2 \English muffins were not invented in England: s5 t {7 x" r9 i. B1 ~9 _* c3 A2 q% S8 L
French fries were not invented in France. + P0 }& k( q; a5 U/ u7 e7 o5 ?, G/ r% E" P
We sometimes take English for granted ( O: S2 |) _* A( }& q0 j: U2 QBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that8 N7 |0 m# M' X- }7 ^5 Y. @9 M8 x3 z
Quicksand takes you down slowly0 x. u% N$ d8 \( P9 b
Boxing rings are square + k$ U- c: b( c7 DAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. / U+ J; s+ Q8 j# H( L' O: _& P% }/ F' y7 _3 @
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.3 a6 |& `! @" f6 w4 Y) \ V
If the plural of tooth is teeth$ |! E7 ^1 P7 w# d# h
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth ) ?, k/ ]8 m4 i2 j8 MIf the teacher taught,% f' k) ?' \% K1 m; [& O" Q% t0 N0 c
Why didn't the preacher praught.1 v% ?, g% |0 x/ L Q8 [
1 n7 u6 I( {- X0 {6 L+ yIf a vegetarian eats vegetables + ^" T `& u6 ?- T/ Z9 b; yWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!? 6 R( a# y6 P5 B& Y0 d* j( wWhy do people recite at a play 4 c: H7 I. A0 `! ]: m; KYet play at a recital? 7 u, @. n6 h8 w$ cPark on driveways and3 i+ _0 F5 A/ Y- X6 m1 p
Drive on parkways7 X' \4 V* P5 h. g- g9 e% @
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy4 r: o' t! Q. @" N6 m
Of a language where a house can burn up as# p4 B1 `; s5 u$ z; m4 _4 I
It burns down & r) J) o& ^+ V& \3 G* y" R# }And in which you fill in a form l$ l/ n V9 j5 C3 U8 _/ Q
By filling it out4 }" p. _: @7 y. B' M* w/ G
And a bell is only heard once it goes!7 ~/ q; i: K( l! d( T! `$ { ~! ]) g
- i; O& M {' BEnglish was invented by people, not computers6 D& R. q8 O2 M
And it reflects the creativity of the human race - e" F! R1 v2 Y/ T) i' C$ w- O8 O9 ~(Which of course isn't a race at all) - K/ B! R0 p% \6 [! i& l Y0 [' j6 X7 J: {, R9 {1 n9 C
That is why* ~0 e! ^, G$ S" W
When the stars are out they are visible ; P& m* I+ Y7 \8 e3 G' q1 o2 QBut when the lights are out they are invisible ' }5 B* B8 m; S3 ]And why it is that when I wind up my watch * n' I {% N7 r c( A/ q: a! e4 fIt starts p2 M# S- |: |- f, oBut when I wind up this observation,9 D$ G+ s. s: V& M9 d; U
It ends.
我看了几行,就看不下去了.0 Y! `& ? k i0 z, |- a
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.+ o; L* M B$ o/ W
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.( W$ g6 l( n# C6 R
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.( y! l% B8 X k
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.! }- @/ z2 m' [" q: p z+ C
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.