 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
5 R; X" _& {3 g$ e: W+ iEnglish is a stupid language.! H5 U2 T6 P% U2 t) w9 F+ w
There is no egg in the eggplant
7 k+ D/ I, S! l3 ~' x' b. f+ Y# [: eNo ham in the hamburger
, A# G, h7 k! F$ J& qAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple." k& A* U' V) y. G4 k
English muffins were not invented in England2 `4 g6 w: C0 f- f
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted- `0 h- A2 @( `3 x* R2 r
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that/ `- C- K# a; Y- N: Y) z
Quicksand takes you down slowly
, i* H) j* `( Q# s* w+ j) YBoxing rings are square9 y P8 c4 p, D5 Y I" M3 `1 p7 @
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
2 B: O" ?, ?' rIf the plural of tooth is teeth, Y: X1 r* }) |5 N& k: Y3 [4 G
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth- h/ o. R, n; ?: e& ^
If the teacher taught,
% n) f+ G1 j$ C9 MWhy didn't the preacher praught.& h) ?4 s8 p! O4 J
7 X2 e- D, Y V- D1 \ N7 tIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
" K2 }0 [: w. P6 b! q* c$ N- GWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?# D9 c4 F/ Y! C; W! l1 z+ v
Why do people recite at a play
$ u; y% |- _9 HYet play at a recital?9 N" Y }, V! h2 p7 O; z
Park on driveways and1 _( ?0 i0 ]: Y, J& ^% f' g
Drive on parkways
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5 R4 Q& E' P8 q8 i9 U: O$ YYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
1 F" H" a+ R, a% P% HOf a language where a house can burn up as& y4 a, _; B( E8 E' B
It burns down
4 ^* x/ g& s5 a2 `' r% W( NAnd in which you fill in a form
9 z6 g1 {# k+ r: ?% ~7 ^By filling it out
* b! r0 k- V6 ? l# xAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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$ [3 o" R* U% k5 z, y4 y( V" k2 JEnglish was invented by people, not computers
& n: W; S, a' n5 U3 K' TAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race7 o; j5 }# m. U0 Y
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why. J8 [! T( j0 `, ]3 @
When the stars are out they are visible9 B+ A0 k8 `' k* i, A) [1 h" d
But when the lights are out they are invisible; D- h% D& z$ Y4 t1 [% h% o/ C
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
% O+ Q# ]! o" \It starts
3 ]' l/ l* ~6 g: `- JBut when I wind up this observation,- H* {% k" m: w! D# `2 W; x4 t
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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