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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?) U& s& N. r* Y; y1 z' E- L
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Let's face it B, {& z5 Y8 g, X1 y+ c$ |6 O
English is a stupid language.# M! p6 t5 s8 v- @% Z
There is no egg in the eggplant
6 }6 Y5 f: C; V: N$ }* T# jNo ham in the hamburger
6 \6 [+ m- u& q+ |! W" LAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.1 {+ k9 T- c0 S M) Q& ?# S( F. F
English muffins were not invented in England3 }9 t: ^5 v4 T8 o( F0 y
French fries were not invented in France.4 ^' B! B% G8 @% l* Z5 F
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We sometimes take English for granted
! Q* B# {' B- A7 y1 PBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that; t5 C9 r6 n0 I) r0 c, H
Quicksand takes you down slowly
/ t% P9 |' N4 y' C* _- a% T; JBoxing rings are square
: B. y2 T, h) [' G M) R y2 g# L/ z1 RAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. " `. i: E" |+ [/ ]6 |
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
5 b$ t& }6 F8 \If the plural of tooth is teeth6 _# A* U1 Z9 a+ Y5 Y8 K( f
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth5 y: T. o, l: u. c" `: S& O
If the teacher taught,
) ~2 \9 z4 V" P; c( c: x5 xWhy didn't the preacher praught.+ v! Y: s4 {! A9 g
2 q9 Q/ y& N% Y; g5 \9 sIf a vegetarian eats vegetables- I7 _+ K$ W x7 {
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?& s) {$ L2 o8 S9 T+ j. U8 o6 {
Why do people recite at a play
% ^) K8 G9 q" I9 wYet play at a recital?
: V3 v1 @7 [- D2 H( I: KPark on driveways and
3 |- \; n! s" U' P' I7 n Y7 zDrive on parkways6 h' g* X$ e Q* N9 {0 q
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy7 C/ F* r# D9 K3 O7 y" B, F
Of a language where a house can burn up as
' d/ v6 W9 [& g6 \" vIt burns down, H: I3 f4 t3 B& ]
And in which you fill in a form
; B1 a- G# v$ I6 w4 ]7 n7 ^5 Q& hBy filling it out$ z ?5 f+ t: l
And a bell is only heard once it goes!9 J) V! w; u: Y+ m. |
1 h/ ?+ j. D6 A9 q( N8 O: }English was invented by people, not computers
) ^, r/ V% t; OAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
$ {) u! {6 [ Q/ C) g0 {(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why
) u! t( A- e% Y; Z; @When the stars are out they are visible
5 n- L6 G, M1 D3 o; M$ mBut when the lights are out they are invisible8 u1 Z! H' B2 S3 l! K
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
; Q3 n9 O( Q, w8 B* o1 H! a: \3 HIt starts
]# c1 J0 j0 \$ b+ a3 v/ tBut when I wind up this observation,) r d- A& r1 w/ A& n
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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