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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it2 h7 V- p( [ A/ i
English is a stupid language.4 S$ H) M5 R' j# y# P. C
There is no egg in the eggplant
7 M. `) q. _- vNo ham in the hamburger) n m" z% t; _4 `, n( _1 O, P
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
! q4 Q/ y$ Q8 H1 U, a% t0 IEnglish muffins were not invented in England% D {* R& T3 B. X2 w# g& N5 X# ~
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted! J T4 m+ K; `
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that: x$ E8 R& i/ ?) B G: k9 X
Quicksand takes you down slowly* R0 X _) }. w/ {
Boxing rings are square7 @; G7 w9 ~$ P( e% X8 h
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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) r M: Q0 Z: v$ v2 K" R. ^If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
& T0 |& P9 t) \' [ lIf the plural of tooth is teeth
9 x5 s4 X/ q# B* j1 ]/ kShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
' l+ T' f: h! S( k( |1 \3 ~) TIf the teacher taught,
& t1 a$ Q, ]& S, l. a/ s# C1 rWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables! ^2 K9 _. R( `4 q& h( C; u
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
( C. \3 E5 d3 e ~4 f# JWhy do people recite at a play
- g2 F( L# l8 D+ r* t0 rYet play at a recital?' a; g# _) J6 L- b3 _! c( s
Park on driveways and( H ~4 D% _. s/ I! w r+ e
Drive on parkways
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8 f2 D9 l& X' h& aYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
/ U; m5 p5 ^7 K0 V0 z6 D# Z- COf a language where a house can burn up as" z1 _, ?; q1 B& B1 h/ }! ~( [9 m4 S
It burns down
; [% H- ~' Q. e: PAnd in which you fill in a form
/ h7 b7 ?4 f: R! k1 U1 j1 ]By filling it out
* k& f# P+ M( G) O7 T X3 t# XAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!7 Q q0 O" R# g0 C8 v
; e! h5 O4 M- X( d n! U$ L" KEnglish was invented by people, not computers
" `; X- A, }- zAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
# x$ G8 ~1 w0 o, X( F5 S7 [. X$ }5 L(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why& H7 i) P W1 f" P
When the stars are out they are visible% T Y5 \* [; [( b; h5 H5 A/ X
But when the lights are out they are invisible
( k1 W1 f, G% B& h) NAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
0 H- J% l! Z' k. T. gIt starts
/ I# a2 P6 ]% Z3 t" G/ I uBut when I wind up this observation,' u/ T2 Z3 S! W; q( s, V) j2 f
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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