English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
+ e1 ~) Q, I% l( P# A6 Z0 ZEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
- _; B/ ]6 x/ M3 M1 ANo ham in the hamburger
/ k9 I1 M0 W. h, gAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
: V# _& [% h0 A9 S$ k; W% }/ b: jFrench fries were not invented in France.
* M4 R& ^2 {1 w" [
, y4 ]! T- ?3 B1 Q1 B) Y6 A3 ~We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
7 e: T( F; n; H0 @+ R2 I  fAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
% N* U. [7 E. `# P4 U# s3 DIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
, P& d) i7 L7 R: j9 S: ^Why didn't the preacher praught.
3 z) {/ M" Q9 f1 T; F5 d( m% c
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
  d# u/ U# p$ Q4 ^What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
5 S( g1 B0 ]" \  I' SYet play at a recital?
4 A$ h& K7 t$ H7 ?Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
  h! f* S+ I/ r
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
2 p' b- F6 ?0 |8 cOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
6 R1 ?; }& v" S: ^3 S) m1 ^) {And in which you fill in a form
$ p, I4 D& a8 t( D/ `By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
/ m: j2 Z4 k* y+ r
& C. t' J+ q* NEnglish was invented by people, not computers
/ A$ Y$ U0 ?. z% HAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
4 d# e  X7 e; W
) V) M. t' h* `0 @3 N1 |3 yThat is why
When the stars are out they are visible
# F% K# `/ K6 U, s1 d3 iBut when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
0 y7 q, Q) _9 {1 wBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
' V! l* b! x4 P# _5 {$ s* g1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
: M, L$ `+ a) q2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
+ w0 q% N9 }+ ~1 }3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
4 V# D( H5 F- r4 |1 H. w其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

+ m! b  V" H" w9 H& w# U: A6 A4 v谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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