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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?9 n! H" F% O3 u3 E! r. R
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Let's face it b3 J$ y, g( } v7 K J
English is a stupid language.
! |+ n; n+ `; g) wThere is no egg in the eggplant: @; x3 g" x. V/ V, `8 m% l1 N
No ham in the hamburger! D+ T* U) Y8 V0 f
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.) Q+ `% T9 D& { Q( v+ e- [& P7 J
English muffins were not invented in England
8 Z3 e2 P. I9 I5 d' u) a2 O) ^% AFrench fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted9 y4 K& D e) X, \
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that( k7 l1 A- A( y
Quicksand takes you down slowly1 V t& o4 n. K/ S |! _
Boxing rings are square
0 x( n: k5 C u: `. n6 fAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ' d+ |/ U* ]6 A$ D
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
2 x1 E: W$ v0 U4 yIf the plural of tooth is teeth
6 _, L' g2 M) H9 G% ]Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth' L4 `5 _5 o' x7 X
If the teacher taught,
$ O) m& [% i2 O# P" }Why didn't the preacher praught.2 M) X9 \9 I( z) C0 C0 {
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables" h; b2 m9 ]! M% ^! T- Z! v7 ~9 Y. d
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?# V: B4 C" N3 R
Why do people recite at a play
. {( ]* d' z& Z& k/ q2 hYet play at a recital?7 W- J& a) P! p6 C/ }! r
Park on driveways and
6 B2 k' }$ L5 m% [Drive on parkways
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+ P" Y' ^- C6 j4 h" {You have to marvel at the unique lunacy1 t B5 _/ ~- D& U0 z
Of a language where a house can burn up as% m$ d5 y- F+ y ^8 `( U+ p) p
It burns down
+ q( q( j3 u! h* _And in which you fill in a form
4 _# ~. i, d7 ^$ a2 o, `8 r2 B6 XBy filling it out5 I& m' u) p. \3 o: D, @3 p. Y
And a bell is only heard once it goes!" _/ ^) h( f7 f- q% O) q( q
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English was invented by people, not computers
9 n; F7 X7 V6 `' b# p) k& |: EAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race, X" Q3 U9 B; {9 {& [" s
(Which of course isn't a race at all)) y) e8 Z2 {, Q2 r
8 Y6 E8 u! S$ w* C9 q& W. i7 JThat is why6 h" z) L1 _8 v; y( I. T6 t
When the stars are out they are visible
6 F3 `& v. k( [# S; H5 BBut when the lights are out they are invisible
$ D I8 A2 j3 A, s5 w- K5 q0 z3 J% qAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
. O- T9 L& K0 j! s. EIt starts( J# f4 s& R/ {, h0 o: m* t
But when I wind up this observation,
7 I6 D* J" p6 y8 f5 s1 g9 w5 G! AIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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