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English language

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?, N( g, }- x2 M2 y
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Let's face it* H5 y! K4 X8 R& N) v" J# ~
English is a stupid language.
$ e& Z4 a- r9 mThere is no egg in the eggplant
/ [' x: P  [$ G# ]* S2 t& ]" uNo ham in the hamburger) D6 [$ W+ n6 @* T3 E8 B
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.& s% e5 o' R- O9 j4 C$ e( @
English muffins were not invented in England7 _$ @$ N  C  E) Z" L3 e1 U
French fries were not invented in France.# I" J( Q6 I1 k( b$ Q* a. p1 B7 L

1 }( ~* A1 T. C4 P0 U/ D9 c9 BWe sometimes take English for granted
5 ^1 u# N7 U+ c& I/ u% d6 wBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
. ~8 P- I) `$ {$ a1 z5 xQuicksand takes you down slowly
8 `$ o& u# J7 D) T5 _6 PBoxing rings are square
# B" X  b: l8 tAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. : H7 d% x0 ?& G
0 l% j+ I% g+ r- ?7 o8 w
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
0 W0 [! W- E( {If the plural of tooth is teeth
1 s+ k! v) L( D# W' {2 QShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
6 E$ I( {0 f! zIf the teacher taught,6 S6 A* s1 h) ]" f7 W* k; O
Why didn't the preacher praught.
  {: b* @5 k0 c6 u/ ^7 _1 a5 \1 T4 |5 h' ]* t' z* K* }
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
) r4 k. w9 N/ g$ {4 w1 RWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?: R% u3 Q" F9 j  t3 s
Why do people recite at a play
4 E: g/ P+ G2 s" z& }Yet play at a recital?6 J8 I! N+ j/ ]( `8 {+ |
Park on driveways and
; Z; _7 `3 Y2 j9 R7 E# x! D$ dDrive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy" ^" M3 K& }; w3 [4 X
Of a language where a house can burn up as
: N# G$ D& w  f( G* k' AIt burns down
, ^  o4 h# F3 I2 a4 M+ VAnd in which you fill in a form
0 b  ?9 ^4 d( A5 ~7 ^By filling it out
% y9 a, w) i% L0 f) Z( J- wAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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2 X& p* ~7 X% S- u( A- [English was invented by people, not computers- ^$ h# A$ z9 d" Y+ G4 _
And it reflects the creativity of the human race9 ]  D* `* g, q  \& n- x$ d! A1 b* V! Z
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why
- o- e  S8 ^: k5 Q- j4 O" NWhen the stars are out they are visible
% P" d" _& x" dBut when the lights are out they are invisible2 E7 [5 E* }9 H- q- B3 z6 D( u; M
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
) x2 l; e6 P% y4 o  T! ^9 |; Z& dIt starts
" @. w8 U9 P3 R( M, w- Y* t9 iBut when I wind up this observation,$ R6 y! j6 {- y
It ends.
鲜花(78) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 18:40 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(143) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:08 | 显示全部楼层

典型的中国人写出的E文.该文写的非常差

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
/ Q3 S4 j- ]# V# C; G% t1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
8 I5 K( `, U& H4 ~" n" `3 f2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
- E" b1 o' E% c  g3 F  j% c9 r" x3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
/ O- T& S! d: P: G/ \0 n4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.6 R0 I) \1 V$ u. `4 K
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.
鲜花(143) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:20 | 显示全部楼层

而且就E文本身而言

老杨团队 追求完美
应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-28 12:24 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-28 16:13 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表 . y5 ^' ?, n+ s  ]3 _7 M) N! O
我看了几行,就看不下去了.: I+ _; o5 }' v. {; s  a6 f
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
* O% P  O; J1 t" j' B5 ~0 w7 `2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

! j4 U6 u9 Q/ y' m+ n# \" q* n
: T: o) O" S& H& M5 A谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢?* H' w9 L* ?* \; G2 z7 X  U2 {1 ?
实话讲,这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
能写出此文的人,一定是深得英文精髓。幽默,有趣。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-12 18:54 | 显示全部楼层
我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗?如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-20 16:07 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-30 05:33 | 显示全部楼层

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