English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
! W( S, r% Z3 w6 X7 e( gEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
4 O8 \3 k2 A! @( uAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
$ w) s3 e% z+ fEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

  K6 b+ W/ e0 sWe sometimes take English for granted
4 J4 S/ p" \: R) f* e/ tBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
7 N0 i# V1 C" {$ [. p" gBoxing rings are square
! L2 E- {; k% mAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

6 [/ A: x) K8 ZIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
* _7 ?; }$ @& K2 r# b8 KIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
( Z" o9 U+ p. O& {: `If the teacher taught,
% }" w: C: V2 V+ b, R9 E* y3 LWhy didn't the preacher praught.

4 H! n1 i  q5 u( y* jIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
2 E: H7 ~5 c2 q. B& X( q/ i: L: Z% ~3 uDrive on parkways

; }: }4 v3 t5 [& m; n+ [% o1 LYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
( c9 f1 Q4 c3 U: pIt burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
5 s  m/ o" _3 X) H$ XAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
/ x& K; X8 P' Z+ {" J
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
5 [# D" p* i; L7 oBut when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
$ n0 e; m% C8 Z9 q5 j* QIt starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
# Q5 n6 {' Q: l1 E- v' b1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
: a0 H2 `' |; P. a0 [) |3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
& A$ A0 f/ X% C+ o$ k3 H6 B4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
4 b. t' {* A  w3 m6 p1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
4 a9 l* ~& |% Z% x! X5 @$ t: R  a6 Y2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

+ P3 _( D( k9 H, v( z
  V, C- z1 q& g' L谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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