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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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* j8 J3 ?3 k9 X, `Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:% R+ p% k9 c- @ f9 V ^* c
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.8 F& r. Q' ?; f1 U X) n" ]% p
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$ B3 b, y& p G3 r6 ^2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals., U+ [8 x& y6 ]2 v @* F7 m
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.& t9 c w# ~8 W: U$ {4 ]8 V* z* f
) { v3 \9 P, P. j( c& T+ Y4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.% P& E7 O/ N s" ~
# m( b' |$ o! w4 L! {9 j5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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! ?8 l' q2 W* x. z& g+ @2 x ]# |6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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+ n5 p& w% z2 K4 E8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
: r4 \( m, c9 W$ t( F% a5 B2 X$ J6 R8 n'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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. c4 m* Z1 Z( }8 `' m# r( d, ^11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.+ q6 H6 T6 F( D6 E, {
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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) f3 x3 p! B& N0 l: R8 U13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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$ g/ h& m, g' s$ p14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!$ k4 ~3 ^) B4 R* v! ?: \2 {1 J
7 s* W: R0 A5 ]6 Q+ y* h' lAnd; last, but not least!)
0 @2 N& x( P% a: @8 p15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
