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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.5 P/ b" q9 ?( T: D) W
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.3 o# E7 n& ~' i
$ `; U4 F; i' |& n3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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( i% m' j/ \7 {- ?8 ?& m! O3 u4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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* \/ p) n' L1 v/ k, @! Q. n2 k5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area$ a0 w8 a7 y+ h9 F; Y6 A, e3 i. x
/ @( D& ]" x1 K6 s7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask2 v8 M5 K3 {8 ~
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' R4 a/ N3 G P; Y" o
( S4 m8 u' r, k/ H1 }9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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+ ]# k3 U9 w D) P3 A8 q10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.5 y% O+ `& B0 l" [4 P7 s# [' v
1 \9 t" ~3 o; N0 J11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.; i, N4 ^, r+ H1 q5 p8 O% }& [
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!) j; y! c) S/ P$ ^, `
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15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
