 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol. t% k8 i7 @% R c2 u1 P% d
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# k4 x# O- j" d+ J" b) o) WThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.7 m6 l# X. ]3 Q2 ]5 R: Q
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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' A) G) {4 q+ P. u# x9 N3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.+ ?) g7 R1 q$ L
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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# ]. t0 z& A) C' ~2 G( {( u5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.' X1 W7 l. j! _ Q% Q: x- n
; W9 C# e* s2 i1 I2 }2 O8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
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- c& P# Y- v) m* R9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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( \ `- k* t; O% v7 A10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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/ d$ A) ^% j7 `6 Q. w12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.7 j% f/ V. e) C
( J9 z4 O% h* \: c8 e% J9 u13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!3 ]9 u0 l/ r+ v f
( l4 h2 a; |3 b14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)4 C) o- b! H1 O' K" Y
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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