 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol% B7 R1 u6 t2 Z9 J
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6 }) t6 V3 K3 A$ k$ AThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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" e3 l- w1 ~4 m1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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( q) L; U6 F/ V5 S7 j: Y2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.. ~# }0 v7 m+ b7 U/ G1 B5 k/ ^
8 T6 ?! Z% z2 a$ e: k3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.' n& ?1 \) c) [! s2 B
. ]1 M; C* a0 K3 r1 B7 N4 f) n4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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0 P# _7 ?; R/ `4 v5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.% t# x2 H( Z% T) k' e6 b( M& C
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& i4 t8 e9 K6 {) h# B9 L# Q- }6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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0 F) C: c+ J p4 r% i3 k7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
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& v7 o" ~ H5 n5 Z+ _7 }! [. b' S9 ^9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.8 U: N f% x: J
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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# T9 S" e; t3 a2 P. b2 V12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels./ G8 p4 y3 ]/ ~* m% X
8 O- O" e& ^( W( ]9 j3 j0 n7 e# a% Y( [$ Q13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)
h6 o0 Z5 s) K& T P3 E15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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