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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol& X. ~8 c. R' d% }" {
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.- N8 e* k! t: x( k J; T8 x
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E. i3 o. l7 q+ [5 S9 s2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.8 h# m) q1 U9 R! g: y- m2 ^' @4 [
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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8 G! W B, e N1 X {5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away., B- o" F. ]7 K3 [+ O! Q
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" z; Z9 [; H3 u' l. x6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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( l8 _# S1 ^2 }* y g% E9 H7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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; J! E) z; N5 ?* N9 i5 d8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask; ` {8 B4 m1 Z9 K7 e* ]7 R/ C
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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4 z6 l, i# l! J' B% C9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.+ U$ W$ t, q' n! o- w' s ~. c
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!: d% Z0 ]# F' A# R, N1 f& M/ o7 H+ E9 K
# h( D- e4 t p* m4 {0 _And; last, but not least!)
7 w M& ?# J( F) X9 C+ J15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
