 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:3 j& \; Z5 O: G0 w/ G
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2 v; T: b) q: w2 ?- _2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.% v9 B6 i1 d. s3 t8 Y
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.5 J+ M/ v3 U; p3 ^$ ~
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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) r7 P- P; C# B) }: k, }- H- E5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.) M1 q: D0 h4 X
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area( r. W0 `& [: q# `0 L6 O% h
2 s3 A; R4 Y' Y, }4 z3 t7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.+ Y4 @0 j( N* b( z* b* G
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask M, B1 }% e. E& ]' Y
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'0 D: N6 V, A/ C) c
\, m6 }! j. c9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose." T+ O3 N9 V: K4 o$ Z
. \% E0 _) v8 C3 b10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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$ E- b+ A& [ Q5 x c2 }11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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% [& t* S) E z/ }" C- d12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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8 _; H# ~0 `% ~( s13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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. c' b2 m* ?$ ?; h3 ]14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)' c* O# M I( b: i- I2 f* j3 t( Z# S
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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