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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol3 m6 \8 M# F; B. G3 q' K
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# ~8 p! T2 x- k9 C" g- O# `5 i2 fThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:1 X5 k; \' f% }3 d, a! K& ?5 {4 D$ Y
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.( ~( K$ D, L& R' d* D ~: R
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.& M n7 c. t W" X1 ^# ]8 s
8 ?! h2 l Q+ K3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.% q0 `1 O+ t2 N- L! I4 Z
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.: Z' H ?6 y* e- w0 [2 ]: X2 x
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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: Q7 x. P9 |5 Q% h6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area7 P/ ~- z7 c! {, o
6 Z; L9 k7 C8 w- {$ |7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
5 o1 s/ K: }1 C' V2 ^+ r7 \# k$ }'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'" J ^" k9 |4 [+ O/ n2 |
! N! E1 ]2 O0 @3 |9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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( q2 n, `! ?) _9 u6 ]! I# e9 V11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme./ E6 h# f) `; P" u7 F/ X. u0 j* M. E* B
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.8 H& x j. o! r: H. `0 w
; c4 C/ ]+ I+ r3 X- I' o13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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' A6 u# M& n& {5 n w14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!1 Y' n( L# L" F
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And; last, but not least!)! P" U8 S; n2 c
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
