 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol3 i/ E) [4 B+ |3 u9 U$ O2 t/ Q
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time: U$ K4 T6 n9 D% o
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.5 N) d6 y2 Y/ v: E8 v
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5 e- S( l+ c0 t8 r2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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# n9 Q% ~6 j8 E6 p5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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& @& Q4 {+ ?$ N. ~% c( W7 W3 g7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.& |# u2 |8 N* {( ^
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask1 e3 f8 X$ L- [8 w
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'9 y4 a1 [: H* Z9 r
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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( k! {& | ~# A% J* e# E; {/ ^10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.2 f9 c0 Y& u- k! P% F4 s
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme./ E4 U0 s& R2 U( H/ I
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!, }1 Z6 y$ M4 z
* a% r5 M' @- u# R7 p14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)( T- z5 h2 k0 e+ K. Z2 w) R0 Y
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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