 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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! K- b2 [: f, a) M. X4 S1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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( X! Z. B4 I+ J* q5 q+ |3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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4 ?& R. W3 x$ ]' W2 z6 R5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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, }% G" F. ?8 ]5 P6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.; u8 i: Z0 N$ W8 o P) y9 H) o
9 k: h% c% h8 j/ ]# R T/ [; w8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask1 J" b( \9 o3 L" L) e
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'6 {$ e! d, v5 [" {& e4 U. T
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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0 Q$ h9 m0 L [; L0 i+ b4 s8 A11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.6 g4 E$ ]$ P8 j0 a- `
2 O$ F+ k6 h" M; d: q6 j8 w; P13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!! x" h7 r. `" A( ~3 n% O& l
0 j d6 ?1 h* q- L14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)
3 p# x% E% w9 L15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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