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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.1 f" j: S' c# c9 P% @
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2 o- `& y" ?7 k; y0 l& L S& v- }2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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1 s! W* f7 Z" ^. r3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.% h: W) C7 r- X9 ], c4 x! a
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.4 V; | Y. ]7 J9 R! ? h" b( B
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask8 d. u( j0 J8 y! J5 J% _
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?') I0 e: w! _: u3 K7 x( a
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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. g' f1 B: Z7 Q2 \+ e+ N) K10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are./ k, `. p# T( R- v+ v* G
. i( x6 D$ q& G7 i( a' s/ u4 Q11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.0 V$ p$ E; a+ e! G& B) u. i0 x% w
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.9 F% }0 @7 H! e
* E$ T' \4 z1 H7 [/ h2 n13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!$ g' A, a4 i; n9 z
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And; last, but not least!)3 `/ _+ ^# K# E7 k2 [- w2 k; f
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
