 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1 _+ u, w& [6 r# @* I, y% T1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.9 W$ ~ f( `: v& R- S* W
, D! o% T' Z6 e+ q9 j/ F4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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; U$ b! n" e7 j N5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area9 e2 U: F! P9 s$ X9 C0 X
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.! X7 e* W0 I; k
% O0 Y; b3 u6 x+ ~% k8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
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3 \6 j0 g2 V. O5 L2 j9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.2 R0 f) `. U; D
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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1 X2 F1 j6 U4 q6 y6 v9 V12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.! Q8 e, ~+ d" i, V* t% Y
+ L6 @4 C/ F# V8 }$ o6 W s13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!" c0 l# i1 U# W. E
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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2 J# @$ b, H" DAnd; last, but not least!): s3 m4 O% f: V e9 i7 L. l
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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