 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol' H6 A6 H( V2 i! A8 n8 T
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4 `7 |6 s% G& i( kThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:* E; F, K, \( d+ x
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking. a8 L6 ]' j n8 d$ W! |
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( O1 m( q2 V& \, |% K2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.0 B; n$ l# i7 Y9 r
5 Y# j: U: B3 I" _. Z. V3 [3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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3 H6 ?0 K+ a) ` d& o$ S- @ H4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.3 S* _' d6 @: G1 w. p2 Z0 m) G
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area1 h8 h2 e, h& J, D4 a' m
' k6 k/ O9 }% O; P4 b5 ~7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.; M1 s- b5 h' K6 S4 V
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask4 L$ u9 D: f: @+ O/ L" I' k/ @
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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; Z: V, \4 V9 e; u3 E% s/ s9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.) v! `) }% q: D4 F4 t0 D+ T- ]; V% c8 ]
7 e9 B: ^4 b. u/ l10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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- B+ @0 P# V6 j( w* t6 A12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.# Y5 I1 m/ w5 Y; `+ [
2 x" B& {" H b: B- t5 R1 C1 {% ?13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!6 g2 X0 e! Z3 |1 V0 G
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!/ s4 e5 S# h! {' g' s4 y6 L
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And; last, but not least!)/ j# ^ ^: C, e9 a
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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