 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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8 S c1 G' y: K% yThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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4 `* |1 T: K: \, z1 ?2 B' \+ [1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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! N C" O4 }+ a# o5 l2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.; \& V4 _4 A# T/ N& I3 K _& r9 S
0 R9 E+ y# f# n; m$ l* ?3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4 N, s3 Y8 I$ ^! l/ y1 ]7 u. R4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.& L. r5 |2 D9 k2 G
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area6 ?! N% F: w: k: X
b8 R, J3 d. H3 Q! |7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask( m l/ z1 \$ k7 W" C. B1 g
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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; h' |. o7 a- g! Y: \9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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6 @6 q% R6 _: C" n7 h* v7 h10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.- O# S/ m g3 d
9 B5 I3 ^/ f3 c& M/ o X: L13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!) c$ M* K/ H3 D! l* f" y8 r& f' k
3 d8 f0 B$ }% D6 b4 y: q3 f14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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& l/ c# P% Q5 b+ TAnd; last, but not least!)4 g" m1 z& v: o4 `
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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