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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol4 h$ }. i0 V; I
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' z- X) e7 m" o* R& qThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:1 }0 C( [5 c5 j1 r1 l
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.$ x' e7 F8 a A8 d
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+ \ p L+ c; ^: y+ r2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.9 o* V7 _& @, s8 K$ S
i9 n0 t' B' v1 |3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.3 o# g7 F8 o9 N9 p- o5 R2 e" B7 x
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.1 {6 z0 B8 @, B* u! ~
2 F* N" K# y$ O% C* X6 A N& P& w# R3 i$ _5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away., z2 f( ?6 y& {0 {/ Y8 e
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" L4 [# _2 y8 V x' u/ i6 F6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
" g# @1 ~$ C$ L2 h'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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0 c! j: L7 n" X7 _5 J- G( k3 _9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.( o" N1 x2 n$ |' O, S9 R
& j, M- e- ~# S' U1 t10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.4 X( i2 `% J \$ \& Z
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.6 y$ b B8 a! ]% w
8 j" b) s& Y$ n3 ^13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!' N7 \: w9 B! J4 F e3 G
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)
% A# Q4 d9 ^. n' f15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
