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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol. d# Z4 s+ \: z# `
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.( H/ ~$ t6 j. A3 G( N; W. S
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3 i* G- I6 f+ T h; N, `2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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) L8 }( w' T2 K0 v# ~( j9 T3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.( O" b7 t1 K) G/ L0 g" \
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.. a$ y* `% w$ @6 ]# Q* a1 G
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area3 H: E4 r- x8 O6 c
# C8 ?# Y2 X, J7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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7 S5 ~4 ]- r( u, O8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
; d& i4 r9 ?/ Y# c) L'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'8 I4 h9 J* q$ |: z& O+ |# M2 Y3 F
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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. d7 ^! c$ n2 X# r) s+ Y11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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' N% F# T0 E D6 w% k13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!6 z# E6 u v$ @$ J% H
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)" E' x1 w9 f1 C' H
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
