 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
$ ?1 W2 Q r) ?5 r% Y. {6 H
: z. I X* b/ \5 c$ w( _, z( u0 \5 O. H' H4 H
) j6 v& N8 S/ j8 B
Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:5 F$ R8 |5 D2 U
7 S8 U) P! Z* @- I
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.4 C o' b/ C- v& X- O7 z% Y+ y. Y
" J# p+ |4 v' m
" Q! ~, K9 @" t2 F( H% C2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
% M( ~( J r: g# x' E
& @8 T+ w5 U# O! ?$ A* X3 v3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.8 \ O9 R& ?! W3 F9 U$ ]5 |
1 R: `% R9 p8 R
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
" _9 N0 T; s' m' Y: k! i% G. {. r' {" G$ X
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.% H* Y$ T7 I1 u( k
9 f4 n, t# O0 P% r$ k* G1 F
7 W$ _/ }, L: }$ B; t- ]1 b
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
5 e5 [- f2 a9 m" B9 }1 ^2 V- J8 _; B: `2 s+ w
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
. f+ z! \4 N: ~9 c0 N& e# Y$ |* l/ C" L1 \8 h) w) g" J: p! B
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, y1 Q; H; G& K- A
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
) k1 U5 t& y/ `- N, t. J. G4 c1 d8 V/ x* U( U! \2 J
9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.2 I" y5 Z6 X- v1 J. [
( y/ i4 n* w0 T6 H! m0 Y6 s- E
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
( N: H+ T" @! k9 i- H m/ r% j8 s+ I1 H4 h! \4 e8 ^& ~" R( ^& U; E
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme., s; w0 J5 p. s1 C/ H1 b$ h/ L
/ g# r3 f+ L8 {
12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
( ]( T: X. E1 b# ^0 q j1 V6 @2 m. R6 X p+ }& {( R- P3 u. V9 w- s
13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!. I8 N2 H; c9 o, g0 B8 }
K) @+ `2 ~6 B14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
) l0 z' Y) ]2 e
1 G4 y8 |" R7 C/ H7 z3 oAnd; last, but not least!)
2 F$ j! G/ B' w6 [15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
. S! p" e: z/ O, j
发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
