 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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" f1 ] h* H8 }5 EThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:+ C5 t& c( U, m- R; z# o5 @& T
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.; t! I& ]( W9 G* N2 ~
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.8 C9 F' e" L; e$ ^
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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$ f# ~$ M$ `. |6 j/ {, ~4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.+ a) s/ _/ ]! T( z
2 @+ w R6 N3 T. e- b C( R5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.: Q T) T! ^2 e2 H
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1 i3 E! J p. @2 P6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask0 [0 j( B" M' v: T* G- y
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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, A% U; X& |2 l1 T1 F# n9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.2 v3 M9 l6 s- d! m- D+ p
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.$ y# Z9 s/ I5 }1 _( M
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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3 b v; J+ {4 d4 a5 }! P13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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- v& M3 C; y6 C+ {' o6 H X; h2 S14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!& [' z. B- y( z
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15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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