 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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& J: ~. V) _* H V+ jThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:+ ]5 d6 S/ x) {* J, x- n# ]
) n8 [8 v# d% T( l1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking. q( A; l) ~0 ?- R) m
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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( @+ U; s9 T, g0 b& o& ]- O3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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1 R8 k0 K- }! ~8 m. u4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens., N$ p/ U1 Y. H" j7 i
# t0 D4 P- ~6 p3 o5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.2 w5 X) j' Q" h4 g3 ~1 p' }- |
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask' r5 b O8 S7 W2 h) n9 G
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' ?$ ?7 a1 `9 l- x. v. U
; u6 [8 e5 ^5 J9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.+ N+ m3 s: s0 d+ f
, e) _) E6 n0 [9 n10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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$ J, ^) q3 L' `; k. v12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.! T4 Z* q1 C! O. F. D
. R5 F2 d5 g- V/ q13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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: l+ ?1 o2 l6 p6 ^" @, k2 D14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!& T6 V E8 |' C- N
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And; last, but not least!)
% \. F/ O. `; Q" s2 u1 Y* i6 s15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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