 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.0 h* e, ]( j/ P5 }1 z P. T
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.6 G5 c" e2 M1 W- X# r* g2 R
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
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! [- ]2 W* }( Z4 c3 I, |/ {6 z; ^9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.1 U7 K* q3 Z( n! X. C
3 e! Y" }( O) c10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.2 m% W9 Z$ P; W5 l' T6 ~
4 q# R2 r( A3 F& B" \. Z5 q) q: G12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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* y! ?' L7 L ?$ k3 d/ N# |13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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: m/ E4 d$ x- r( C- r14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)' k) b$ k% Z+ a# g
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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