 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol+ A% P8 X9 ^9 R; E% H
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.7 u1 S+ o0 [) ?6 D( T
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* t3 n, F0 k x2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.* o4 ]/ c1 s; l! a
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area' E, G) }& F8 q: \
: T& q9 a; t( f" M7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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- d$ l( u9 W! q: k8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask( D4 o$ ^( F7 ?4 ]
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.) G$ f+ E( c R! {& y3 o/ f- X4 N
) K9 r# x ^) G# h% \9 K8 ^% l10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.) d8 Q& H/ ~0 G6 D
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme./ Y2 p0 \! a2 F, `; Q' }
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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8 M: D% O) K, f+ }13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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% {& c/ M' Y, x) U2 [# J5 `4 }14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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