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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol6 u) m( e' N( e$ E8 h* r. f8 Z
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.5 G% }3 R* h# P+ }% t
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. ?1 }6 u/ ^: H) _2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.: Q: [5 Y! c% q: ~" h
5 J; z4 X; A- m7 S. k4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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9 d, j% ~& L) X1 ~ }5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. j1 _% o7 f6 B( L6 i. U" k
+ q) N" ~# u* e- N5 M# f7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.$ v8 \1 V7 ?* `! T. S2 k. f/ p% v" J
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, @/ Y+ N6 l$ I) J: B1 c
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'' t8 u: Y# E: z6 c. Z' u
) n ^- v: i! e' t2 m- w5 Y9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.( B7 r" ]5 _1 ^% M2 U
: `, i& W( {7 p! a10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.3 @% `7 q$ z+ I/ {$ Q2 Z
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.' ^1 b3 e( S$ I, u
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!( j- v! C2 a% }: f
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!, A% T/ ]' b. q( h% c: l% s7 h, c- V
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And; last, but not least!)
" G8 M% T5 B; N" X1 u: G15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
