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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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I+ Y5 Z+ E. G0 u- W% NThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.- L3 Q2 m3 t1 x3 m! E% K! x: _
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$ d* n0 a# q# N, O$ l7 ~; p2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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/ f0 y2 O, L7 J+ w9 b" R% ^) u" ?3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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4 N* S0 J9 e$ `5 q4 N0 Z; j5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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8 i/ d8 H7 s9 G9 E+ w6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area; z5 ]1 X5 q5 q8 [
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
( N( Y, i! @; e2 l( g5 _5 z'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'/ | ~. {7 M4 h& P
" x& B; @7 G* p8 M% _2 w. f9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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* u! ?3 _ a f4 l* D10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.+ n, d4 q1 A+ d3 q+ [4 h
4 M/ a6 C v: A: g$ M11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.1 f5 s& l i) Y8 W. X
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels. d3 [2 j9 W% `# X2 U
1 t0 I+ |5 L3 s( d7 \4 B13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!6 X$ h" L1 \; D8 \9 g. p# c6 D6 U
' ^; |. x- H0 b8 a14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!- v. ^6 Y7 W3 l" y9 ?
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And; last, but not least!)+ ^) B' j8 y$ D. n' R7 C5 u) j, w
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
