 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol7 ^+ g2 r: |3 d! t( e& d) Q
: ]) o8 J- H0 r- N2 |, g$ e2 H9 f2 `; o, e$ ]
& r3 N$ y. V8 ~, W/ c
Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
9 j/ S1 f+ ~: N6 m# ^$ B( |& F/ W! w3 n: `
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
& g2 g6 Y0 s5 ?# V. \! m/ {
1 S- ~% w& R& V7 I# x/ m
' |4 y+ P! o/ |8 m: \2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
8 ]9 ~9 J/ G- `8 \3 x) H/ ^' O3 I* I/ Q
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms. V' K+ f1 \1 }9 H W/ L. q
$ |" P! C' u$ s2 s) r0 m
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
" j0 {' P7 K2 l* G `, A9 G3 I
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
% E- O1 a+ f7 N3 \ ^. ?% p, ~$ h' B& {1 O, q( W4 S
! _& j/ T6 Z0 |( m6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area7 g' ]& u1 t6 k
1 O$ n6 \; ^2 T G( \) m1 M) [7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
7 `4 m+ s% t& b' w C. ~4 F0 Z, N9 J; A5 D- u+ F$ M- ?
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask+ ^. O4 u( n8 Y' S% R9 {+ t% J
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
/ h- O: q) c9 a! u% j. a6 P( r* U, B0 F
9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.( U$ ~& M9 n6 M& W- x
$ C) J- x/ P& K* k7 @; _; b10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.9 d [: ?1 R% I
; h* q a, e0 O11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
6 c9 R" F. H2 [8 H4 ?: o. b; [! F8 ^& ^# D0 H( A8 }
12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
- n, K5 b3 n% f! h) L2 E* t
! X* |4 L. w, X& v& o, T13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
; O0 L6 Y, B* }7 i; W6 d3 D- ?
! S* t, Z% e5 H% s# V$ Y& Y5 m14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!# E( K: v+ t9 v% |# _# d
% O# ]3 l+ t/ u9 KAnd; last, but not least!)
' {3 n% t, d; W1 y/ c15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
! ^4 p" b# I3 d0 @3 \
发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
