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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.5 ?: O' s0 E( c
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.0 G' t* H1 j1 L) b
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:" A  |5 T+ m2 c9 E, P" ~
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?", m4 D6 }. e% i) w1 g( [( p
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?. j0 E4 C# v. V
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"& N- O) O$ S! j5 M

+ @$ O8 L9 y8 BI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!+ G( F. j  W5 z1 u/ o

) ?, D( {7 ^1 p+ G; A/ O0 wI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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$ R+ ]4 K; r6 E- j1 S5 B0 V! l& ESo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"  j5 P( `  ^) P' o" |

% m* Z" d. k8 }1 t/ uNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”& w7 e( K7 n6 H2 u3 y" z
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:2 e; k" g( P4 S9 l# U4 p

& d; j" P4 `6 Q" [; B$ @& ?1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.- R; a  V* ]3 T+ F% W0 r) _

7 a6 l0 _: D. R9 H2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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6 J# S) O4 I$ s2 t( B  y  {"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion./ C( K* _1 ?* i# Y) i& T: ]
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.# u5 ~) D( ^% M* _" S

/ X/ s- K. b4 G6 D& u1 HThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
- ~3 T. V8 `* b) }  L$ Va young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
& i3 X3 @8 _6 T8 U- N5 m: W' \4 W怎么理解?( ^  w" r% l' B5 ?( n
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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( N& S) `% p8 a4 [; t8 |不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
' a' h3 H1 O  B% ]! L% p怎么理解?  }3 b- ^" ?0 ]$ j, w$ E# I& U$ y. [
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
) f; v# H+ k' N0 zcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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/ L/ S% r! N3 w7 A6 A我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳 - q1 h; T, S$ z3 `9 o" w

5 }& F; t/ `# L: s我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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