 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.5 ?: O' s0 E( c
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.0 G' t* H1 j1 L) b
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:" A |5 T+ m2 c9 E, P" ~
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?", m4 D6 }. e% i) w1 g( [( p
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?. j0 E4 C# v. V
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"& N- O) O$ S! j5 M
+ @$ O8 L9 y8 BI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!+ G( F. j W5 z1 u/ o
) ?, D( {7 ^1 p+ G; A/ O0 wI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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$ R+ ]4 K; r6 E- j1 S5 B0 V! l& ESo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?" j5 P( ` ^) P' o" |
% m* Z" d. k8 }1 t/ uNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”& w7 e( K7 n6 H2 u3 y" z
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:2 e; k" g( P4 S9 l# U4 p
& d; j" P4 `6 Q" [; B$ @& ?1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.- R; a V* ]3 T+ F% W0 r) _
7 a6 l0 _: D. R9 H2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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6 J# S) O4 I$ s2 t( B y {"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion./ C( K* _1 ?* i# Y) i& T: ]
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.# u5 ~) D( ^% M* _" S
/ X/ s- K. b4 G6 D& u1 HThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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