 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.# T/ n3 c& O( }+ e
1 S; D& B f' z6 o0 bI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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7 R4 s: U8 u* Z( o- GI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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+ x% o: U7 j3 v5 w8 H/ p' n5 W& ^9 q. `I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?", V( m$ X9 v8 }$ r5 u
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?9 X5 ? {5 w! [: J
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And the second one was:2 U2 u1 K2 u4 y3 p# w
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?) S& ^2 W" T6 Y" k$ Q' x& n3 `. I
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?". Z; P9 ?' `( ]! E' x
; ^1 m7 D, K2 w5 HI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?. f6 U% k* v( z
# x- N& r3 ^: X! m2 {I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:5 g; v1 k- J2 p' o6 U/ T5 i- H9 ]
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.8 @7 {: P' t2 \+ G' b u
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.5 `$ p* T8 T( V7 Q8 z
8 T7 r: k. `* a"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States". e& t' U* p( [# ^3 H9 R
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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" a. z, l, ?2 u F7 t9 rThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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