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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it.
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- Q! j6 Z6 I% S6 Z9 @8 p9 gI love words. I thank you for hearing my words.
& u. L* s& t# L0 t6 kI want to tell you something about words that I think is important.
|: c8 ]& m6 y/ K$ ^" Q: d8 zThey're my work, they're my play, they're my passion.
3 m1 W% M- I$ o; n* gWords are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.7 s7 \- [3 U4 j7 I+ a" L
then we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for, g" ~( `6 n7 E& _
that thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same2 n; a, K0 P7 n3 a
words that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.) f2 O% F T/ e' R6 [
There are some people that are not into all the words.
* B! p! x+ B$ W% A E5 X gThere are some that would have you not use certain words.9 Y5 y8 W. q" W7 R
There are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7' H n9 @+ f0 r0 K. u# C
of them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is.
% M+ J8 N% s8 k1 b6 Y; O- c399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous7 H* A# |' u9 D5 o3 y8 D' k7 e
to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,: u( X0 Y" _; S' g$ X3 B
Bad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?
) |, g$ c- Z3 s1 y"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,4 M* r9 C0 L& y# D: Q" G( @4 I
and words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?
7 k. S* W' m" R, A- v"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"5 U/ ?- c' k+ N
Those are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul,3 U6 G# Y3 K6 L
curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war.
3 o$ e) C8 ?) Y"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"! y8 h# ^- [9 Z
Wow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly6 i/ p7 q) R0 f; K7 ^. v$ v: u
sounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here,. ?! `/ r8 {4 p4 @$ G H9 o' m
man. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a
) B) _ |% f9 m+ Hsnack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist$ c" p9 \$ V! d) c) b
snack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,
( ]: l) x( ?4 d/ e1 z9 @Pizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just0 N1 Y9 i- L$ e7 W
One." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does
7 k z9 B+ }/ T- u! _not belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,+ l) Q. A: Q2 X0 v4 Z( k; n
but you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not
0 ]1 L+ Q: m$ a6 T7 r! ecompletely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why N5 X' q( S/ r3 o9 b8 h
some of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and
7 r1 y$ U! c! \. PMotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on, f' r& q: v0 Z* a
there. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling.: l3 ?# F! D9 b' q( s- N
I mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend
/ {7 n' W- m0 ?6 e* Uwith. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at! R' O8 b" H9 Q$ o+ t* I
you like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
( a0 a, `' M4 q( l* _It's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the. F6 ~* u5 q. \+ e1 [
other 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go
& H: Y9 k+ q8 F# ]together of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that3 _2 M% t* b' c3 ?8 O. `. R
Piss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were6 M- `; T8 H8 |. y _1 L
certain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I! `! @% i/ k" ]; f% N
don't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such0 T& T1 y3 [5 H. l
stupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now.". C5 z1 e3 x+ Q0 |. X0 {1 M' c& A
And, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more
6 R$ ^6 D1 e: P0 Y% [6 r% \accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think
9 c6 C1 z2 c3 D: n* Wit takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very% _( W# V9 W- s9 G) I- S" ]2 o) B
imprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to" ~/ o0 M" l' ?: S) ]
hurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,' w$ Z2 d0 p9 t5 w; a, G
"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love; M$ O4 H n4 Q
than 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is6 z- K$ S4 [$ d4 Z/ _) J4 @
a great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but
; O1 n& N3 Z% Y9 e0 a/ L$ m0 }I like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for
6 `0 E+ `0 X* ^ jthe word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,
, B3 T4 l, c* c% ?' N% BSherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow."
+ }7 O9 c; q$ P9 t& V7 HSo maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word.! v& F: V! Z, ~* c# M; t9 ?
I hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any
# l$ I5 P1 `2 ?& D3 @5 Fcircumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even0 g8 Q# t4 \7 _- J8 Y P. n
clinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,
7 [4 r* h: Z1 U* u# b, w5 t' land Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out.' Y7 ~3 h) R; C$ Q9 o
But there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words.
( C5 O. A7 @! [# B5 i0 K0 o$ d" ]Remember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock; W6 e9 ~: z4 b8 G2 W& I3 O/ S
CROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in
, i5 k! g- Q8 t! y( B7 Uthe bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for, c: n- Q5 G0 w$ B5 N. a
Kirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't
# W9 h$ A* `8 m2 k: I/ Rsay "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding
& ^( r6 U% h* B2 w. \! Zthem. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that0 M% ?' A' F6 |( D8 W
goes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You
7 m6 p3 e8 R8 ?; p ocan prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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