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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it.
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I love words. I thank you for hearing my words.2 k* x# i, M' ? E
I want to tell you something about words that I think is important.8 m, Y' Z8 R* S
They're my work, they're my play, they're my passion.
- t: _' w: @$ \+ B# xWords are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.
9 |/ S9 L* ?7 a( G) `then we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for2 N( M! D0 T6 d* H- R6 A2 D1 L
that thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same$ r; V9 @( U" N Z
words that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.) F! V; w# _7 `4 _# S
There are some people that are not into all the words.0 e; n* t) T* j- z# G
There are some that would have you not use certain words., k; s( m; n, E+ n. X* ^3 \3 O
There are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7
3 V$ Q. b4 V/ _. @: l/ F+ a6 K/ Uof them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is.
9 A* j6 n7 }. O3 k, L399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous7 {. Y) Y6 T# d* s7 s! z4 a
to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,* C* Y& f) B) h- x$ E! |
Bad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?5 J+ f- v6 ?" ^$ b$ N
"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,( |' [/ P' w$ w: ~
and words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?
7 C0 J, m# x4 g* e2 U1 S- u) g"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
% `4 z) B; P: v! D& EThose are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul,
j1 k% p0 u. j/ b5 M" a" acurve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war. G2 ]7 r0 |$ ?' a) d) r
"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"2 T3 Y! e+ e. u7 P! q
Wow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly/ M; `/ ^. {# \8 `- @+ ]! P# d5 f
sounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here," I) Y* T# w. g/ g& H0 f
man. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a8 |( J J% {) |) v4 G2 h5 n" c
snack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist% Z- D9 z3 g/ f: h% b) S; D# L
snack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,0 H) J( h% l/ s! |
Pizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just
1 m, `1 L% S: T) q$ I3 p' W9 A: IOne." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does$ k1 Q* U: E' D0 W. J" p
not belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,. ^- V; ]# N3 ^
but you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not
. d9 ^( ~+ C: ^- V9 v# B. ncompletely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why
3 w8 J! l$ |5 K* asome of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and. L/ D/ ^- E6 k4 n2 G/ ~2 t
MotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on
! T* M/ n. q4 l# R, S: Bthere. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling. e# {# M) @' V+ g9 J1 q8 L/ C
I mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend0 w% H- j8 n% d
with. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at( w6 v% S8 v% f8 }7 ^
you like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
7 L/ |, n5 P3 S9 E# z. g; XIt's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the$ N7 E! c2 t/ A/ p
other 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go
: H1 @2 Z2 A' Ctogether of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that8 ^5 ?. z) Z, y1 `+ M
Piss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were& V* \ |8 r9 C: ^3 \( e. s" @
certain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I
9 [5 m& Q. D0 Xdon't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such6 O# I: P1 v' ?: Q
stupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now."& u+ Z3 Y$ Y4 a/ B( D. z
And, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more2 o- X' S$ I' L0 a+ }
accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think
% }* ~6 \( X& G* I$ o+ X% G- Vit takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very
( M* x/ I0 c5 Limprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to
/ ~2 F3 w/ u+ a; b1 @: D3 t" l dhurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,
3 L4 \0 }5 O. L1 V, E"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love! {6 B0 V5 T6 j0 s2 o) `
than 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is2 O( n* e- s0 F( p1 i
a great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but
. X. K8 X5 L* ]- mI like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for! X9 W8 [3 Q3 b* j5 o5 m4 H4 {
the word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,
; \& A# G s3 t* t6 N3 [. eSherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow.". N7 o! _" P0 T, y. N
So maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word.
" L {, e& C) {; ]( H1 v. FI hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any
" ^; Y# E4 q \3 Y+ k1 | }circumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even
. h5 h% j* q6 {; K( C0 h# _clinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,' N3 a* ]7 ~: j& M
and Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out.4 l$ u! F0 \) c0 T' D% ]
But there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words.$ ]+ Q- ^; O0 ?0 g" ~, a
Remember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock
2 M0 X' Q2 i+ X* X9 wCROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in
$ ~2 \! S! m( W( F' K8 dthe bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for1 v; A: B: I8 c: E ]% }
Kirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't% R2 O2 D8 {4 U6 I( |/ Y
say "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding0 k4 t2 B$ K8 y5 y3 Z k
them. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that
" y% ~: @0 H' Fgoes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You1 f, z$ p) C9 u$ T
can prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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