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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it.
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I love words. I thank you for hearing my words.
( G1 A0 D8 @: ]$ l4 X- ~/ BI want to tell you something about words that I think is important.
# j9 A( n9 {$ s0 Y; B( |8 T# fThey're my work, they're my play, they're my passion.
K( _8 K$ N7 X. XWords are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.
& a' d% D& y/ v" C1 O9 z9 cthen we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for
* Z+ e+ M/ w3 _$ q( zthat thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same
0 ^/ d. f6 P, ~+ f, _words that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.
; O' t2 ^8 q- oThere are some people that are not into all the words.; s; M0 V6 m! r8 @0 X
There are some that would have you not use certain words.4 Z4 e$ x9 {+ Q3 t
There are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7
( D1 ?! p# f4 W+ D! i( Bof them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is.
+ t; u% R; v& T% A0 ]399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous0 D: f0 N7 Q9 C' m
to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,$ f+ o! Y$ {1 q2 ?# O: L
Bad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?
" N$ l/ s; p) z/ a7 d"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,: s5 }" |+ v) X8 X; T; A9 [
and words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?
6 d( O% @ E+ d$ s"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
9 ]' x2 {& ?+ z- t* ZThose are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul,/ R* p5 q4 L, J5 K
curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war.$ N- r% F1 c2 H& @( r
"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"( S1 U5 `9 ~4 m# g3 |& q
Wow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly+ e6 q2 x9 m9 d- V; }( b. a* c
sounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here,( z1 w0 S: f0 L5 ]- z
man. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a, p+ ]% Z6 f) P {1 W, e
snack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist# ~/ i2 Z0 y3 n
snack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,
! S8 J4 j5 u% [; C+ o/ MPizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just) A) A; l8 s( E4 s; V
One." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does
+ W4 q$ s+ n3 L* I1 Lnot belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,0 p; j$ P L- g9 H- a
but you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not2 ^ M. h. G0 d3 f
completely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why& n# s) g/ v; N" D1 n+ z1 r# F
some of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and
( M1 ~7 u) d w7 yMotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on
& o7 r% m E$ ^7 u2 L& E. G: p7 rthere. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling.
6 G; K _+ {5 s4 [. _4 P# FI mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend
4 `. v$ j- j1 xwith. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at
! N' L5 v2 Y# y; ~- {1 _& Kyou like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
4 A R) B D9 m x/ t" hIt's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the0 P. l" G( D7 R5 B9 Q
other 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go
+ n+ F& q5 ^, u* ?, ltogether of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that
' e3 u( j# M( ]; Y) y' v. _! \Piss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were
( r1 L7 T) F5 k& Qcertain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I
7 `- V/ I7 u. p8 s( C/ sdon't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such
* Y" }9 ~! Z/ estupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now."
! N8 A" u4 z8 O1 f/ ]* L& P: nAnd, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more2 O( M9 ^, V% p+ r
accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think, g# w) o3 Q! z w% B% Q F" s
it takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very
- P+ R- o3 W0 C) b. Cimprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to" r: A# c- l) x
hurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,
' b: {* y& Z* w0 [- B- f: T"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love' O6 x& g. ^ h& q
than 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is
( T/ k: Y; {* K2 M+ V fa great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but J3 A/ W0 ]0 o0 |) i" m! A
I like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for
# R' T: |5 [9 J. A, {2 P$ Y: lthe word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,, W1 U+ }6 ?9 r1 R2 d
Sherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow."
3 u7 Y4 j7 `# u$ ?* bSo maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word.1 j; W0 P Q4 E6 R- E4 n3 W
I hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any7 W: L" K q: W* x2 ?9 \
circumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even
8 I, ?, Z0 _0 e5 R/ _clinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,
- w+ Y; z' T$ V* F/ T) I+ |) \) g1 Y( Yand Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out./ [( ]7 K" u! g0 a8 R2 U
But there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words. ^/ f* g: b* C/ b( W
Remember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock
( } m! h# ?2 LCROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in2 ]4 [* u; v. G+ X; x
the bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for
0 W- C) O: l# k# d- z+ uKirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't5 ]$ e, S( F. _+ j3 N
say "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding
z! P5 d. ?/ P% T( Zthem. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that1 X" d( R, |& F4 Y. B; G, n# c+ k
goes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You
. A& ^, ]+ v- n) U, o) J: V9 z9 _can prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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