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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it." Z4 E$ e: S1 K. D7 ^* ]* n- f
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I love words. I thank you for hearing my words.( r- o7 X0 _; _" p/ }
I want to tell you something about words that I think is important.5 c9 }4 X% c2 X& r) ~2 Y. \
They're my work, they're my play, they're my passion.8 T ~: e. @- S( z1 q# R
Words are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.' g$ k1 \! P% g7 c. G2 N' E
then we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for6 y$ [! |$ C1 P# ]% A
that thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same
' R. V% A/ b5 T+ G3 p& i" Dwords that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.
: H% P8 V4 J) ]% ~+ z8 P' b$ _There are some people that are not into all the words.
' T/ _$ i9 P' LThere are some that would have you not use certain words.
' c" R7 e2 v4 j& {There are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7
' W& M0 q/ Q; P6 j) J! Y" ]4 Uof them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is.# h6 q5 b$ N; v2 w9 ?! j9 e, x
399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous) d: ^6 G. I/ V9 h; e% E6 K
to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,, U1 b# S, r0 r- I3 M! {
Bad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?. i7 b) j6 F$ N% K
"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,
5 ]9 H9 d. B0 q$ w a! Qand words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?6 `1 v0 t7 y/ R* Z# O8 F% g, a
"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
' V' @9 @; M r% WThose are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul,
) W$ i. P- X& V0 S, N* \curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war.
7 M! J! U6 G' ^9 w" m4 `, _, W"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"; Z) c# F8 b' t8 z% V% k' R' V( u
Wow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly
1 B$ \6 w# u: Xsounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here,
) v v6 [2 Y2 P( J( f. ~3 T% I& @man. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a
3 d* ~# n, X9 isnack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist
, Q7 Z# v) E* J6 }9 k* I) }snack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,5 C, { M2 \! G0 |$ k& M2 g; r
Pizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just& j5 @) A2 @/ j, D- Z+ a
One." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does
|% { ] }* e# hnot belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,
9 r/ A, ]# `' s3 O8 g5 e# k( u2 O+ obut you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not
+ p0 s( e* a7 P7 ecompletely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why, H$ ?/ s; {& D6 s$ S9 `
some of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and
8 ^ c- `7 \! A, A; ~ x6 a, z' mMotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on* i' X! D: h$ k; z3 J S' _
there. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling.3 E; j- y% Z) J( T: w
I mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend7 M0 _: m8 H8 V: u. J% H! z
with. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at) R, Y; ^0 {) ]# c. _( g! Z3 a. s
you like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
% E1 n# J% z7 y, s3 y9 m! NIt's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the
* E- A7 X5 o+ vother 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go
6 n5 q& ?+ _( H7 mtogether of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that# n9 b" Y8 [0 z6 D4 e) J
Piss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were
2 A$ Q% R! m/ O0 pcertain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I
- P x. n0 V( z. J) p4 r: p3 ddon't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such6 m: D! h8 L8 R" W) M
stupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now." g- ^( A/ m V$ G$ Y8 ?
And, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more* l+ Y- C' ]* z2 z% H$ E) ?/ b$ t7 g
accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think- V; g6 V" I1 y. }6 D8 Q
it takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very2 o% D( D* w7 k# j- h* o( ~" q
imprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to$ m& g/ `1 t* B' T+ ~6 d- Z0 j
hurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,
* m. A: l- i8 e, w6 |# n"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love9 \$ o- W2 X1 l, v) Z
than 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is
0 s% h/ `5 {& aa great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but/ N: Y( }# r& {
I like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for
& z. l& g' Y) C& r/ ~the word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,
) Q3 f" g& _3 `8 n: F" v I9 rSherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow."( L& t8 h b+ T; a) \% ]
So maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word./ \8 q! [% b3 Q' E) }* G( ~' V
I hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any
7 m4 w1 y' ]* o' w, b% Ucircumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even. {( }5 h6 b7 P* R* g1 L9 ~
clinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,
; x' l! j4 [4 G, c9 H4 Z4 Land Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out.
1 `' P! j' @* O5 q. T$ [; A* i5 K2 s h' IBut there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words.2 N! B) K8 i) _: s/ u! S. z
Remember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock
2 J- y% @( u7 c$ ?0 M: w0 l2 TCROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in
, P9 H6 i8 V" J8 r: o2 N: e2 S3 Wthe bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for
{7 @; n$ c# {2 A- O( f3 x2 h) g* t, o8 {Kirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't
! @% t6 x. y8 \: K% x4 Vsay "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding) {, G/ T. o) p: [! ^
them. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that
: W# C( V" l' l d! e: dgoes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You
8 |7 c+ D$ I5 Y6 v9 w, `7 ]# ]can prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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