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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it.& v5 M5 I& w6 Q9 S5 F! {* C
8 A2 X) @* r$ z' O: z/ sI love words. I thank you for hearing my words.
) X. s% x, b7 W: z) u6 t/ ZI want to tell you something about words that I think is important.
. o( f1 f# X8 c2 l7 a; ZThey're my work, they're my play, they're my passion.# e- [+ r& [0 F F$ y! X% ^
Words are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.2 j1 p8 X: o. N* F
then we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for
w) H2 O% i; B" Xthat thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same; b0 O2 B& h5 T# W1 u! e. z
words that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.
9 B! m& k* ?' E4 C lThere are some people that are not into all the words.
5 D2 U K" s- Q: p& EThere are some that would have you not use certain words.
% x7 r' r0 w8 l7 W; c" g% KThere are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7
4 _- K0 {$ V- \( T! T& xof them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is., G$ d2 p8 H" ?$ ^8 K8 [
399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous. u( m6 W# ~2 W8 ?5 Z3 [1 p
to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,7 P9 h1 c) V* k' T4 O! q
Bad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?
, o! F' @% s. A"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,
9 m8 P7 C. F3 P9 H3 n# N- P# land words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?: E5 }8 I: Y/ y+ ^- X
"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"5 M: h9 {: c6 e% t R% U: v0 c
Those are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul,
1 N' k8 S) l4 z) H" ?- P8 }curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war.
, v8 d+ {, E' j, `5 G: P"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
4 o O. K2 M* K# kWow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly; s) L1 B. q/ j ?1 {7 n
sounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here,! h, F: s! z; I. [% X, |. D3 j
man. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a3 `$ r+ A+ n# f% u
snack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist h5 Z) V! N7 a: h3 g! w
snack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,/ E: b. u8 G( O9 b2 _1 ]& ]. F
Pizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just! c* h( H0 D8 `2 Z
One." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does
7 v) f. A1 u: knot belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,
2 K' z/ S# w5 z* W4 G! G3 kbut you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not
4 | w- |. L; }2 X' S1 @* z9 R* |' icompletely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why: Q& ^4 M2 D( G8 z4 @
some of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and- @. _# P u) ], s0 Y$ J4 X
MotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on# o! B- K5 B( R+ N% I( Z$ r! D4 G
there. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling.5 d+ r7 @ H0 L/ n5 a2 G) \2 @
I mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend
2 G$ p/ a8 T3 k7 L7 q( @with. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at0 z% w; M# v) n+ A$ A
you like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
3 {& C4 W) H) h& K y4 zIt's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the: B: O* ?9 N! \9 {' B
other 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go1 j% F3 A( ?* ^
together of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that
, Q" `* }/ K/ j& ?Piss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were o- ?6 k* K' Q# J0 W
certain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I
3 s, }5 R; g" ]5 {5 ^don't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such
1 v6 J2 E; j% a4 v& rstupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now."( x, h$ V* D% f& j2 w o8 K
And, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more
/ l* s" D9 P: n. C! w& }# ^accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think. ]2 U9 W9 l% X( U6 z
it takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very
/ p5 `$ K N% k% }: p( V: T, cimprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to
% b8 Z/ D9 d- U6 [4 J5 bhurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,
2 P' W8 D1 U( Q8 C; Y"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love
( [8 ~" @% @* L; G" Fthan 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is# n# k( H2 u6 ]+ N4 B) Z) ]
a great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but
8 R& b0 Y" x7 H8 Z* n; y& D4 h/ d# tI like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for# S% w; T2 e. S9 ?
the word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,1 `2 y! ]% y: w, Z
Sherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow."
# Z* f5 J$ |$ Y( v: bSo maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word.
# m% z( K3 s2 `( s0 I5 PI hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any
9 ]( x- T0 x+ P; o* G, q/ scircumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even
, `+ |" _* g% {4 N S, v5 v hclinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,: u" a$ }& ^! l2 d( n; y
and Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out.
" Y/ B q, ^& H1 R. [; ~But there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words.$ U( K' U; K4 }5 W4 U" C9 g
Remember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock& i9 b; O' _8 I: r0 e. h1 H
CROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in
( {6 ~( l8 W" l) G% y0 M& Q% S) V& e% [the bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for8 K% {; R! J) d$ g- [# @
Kirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't
" F% {# \% v6 Nsay "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding. m$ q# y- |9 c- h
them. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that) \2 L2 A+ y. ], @2 I
goes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You# ?+ t/ Z) o: k" n9 ^# d( k
can prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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