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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it.
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& _ Q0 _: m0 x2 q: G( g: K/ S( MI love words. I thank you for hearing my words.* i& `( B# @7 r+ s# M9 n3 D
I want to tell you something about words that I think is important.
7 [ C( q1 f6 C3 k HThey're my work, they're my play, they're my passion.
a+ c/ K9 f7 g6 z v+ L ZWords are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.
+ E D O+ W9 _5 Q7 j7 }- mthen we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for
! b% g. x4 ]% \$ {* z ^2 U2 o& Y( jthat thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same" d# [4 H5 P/ N y0 H, I
words that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.
1 W0 W" a% {+ R# W. C' LThere are some people that are not into all the words.
+ T- D [; q. b' q) k7 jThere are some that would have you not use certain words.
]- M8 A4 k- z, @2 @* ZThere are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7
" a* H. ~, n8 S, bof them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is.
% L0 M. x4 y$ F C6 k; l) @399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous* c: e- T# [$ l" [/ H4 r3 u/ h
to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,6 O1 c# d: t$ X, K
Bad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?
7 z5 j1 @6 v* e& H2 K8 {3 O"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,
" A2 R, Y% B) t! o9 ]9 kand words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?
! G+ {7 w( V8 l/ O7 \; ^$ q"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
3 u* N$ y9 E; V1 R' w6 bThose are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul,5 I2 q) k- _4 I. V! o1 U
curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war. n8 d" q+ S& q% D7 Q# l
"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
- A' w: Q: b+ n# u8 E" QWow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly
' e5 n/ n. p$ S. M" u4 |sounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here,
1 o; S& I/ K5 T# z$ f- N$ Z7 M/ yman. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a: W; ?, ?+ _* r5 o1 y
snack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist
?2 }! v$ Z6 _+ R' K, H( Asnack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,
# I/ {6 J* P% l* u6 W$ cPizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just! q1 ^5 [" c+ Z
One." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does
: c v9 G, v. u* Q! S* ~0 Unot belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,
& O$ Z( c' _! z$ h mbut you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not
1 o/ W( q- ?# u) D; ?2 O+ g& Ocompletely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why
8 V+ S* ~* K* @4 Q+ I6 C$ U7 Dsome of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and3 ~7 c7 t7 N N
MotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on4 n! P6 |. x e+ H, q$ x |
there. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling.8 y- X: t9 ~* {, H- Y
I mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend
o" B$ j# ^% e4 iwith. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at
9 s) j: z0 o+ e: q) {7 ^$ Ryou like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
$ S" y9 N# G' s0 \8 e- u$ ~# AIt's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the; e$ R% A7 G, a T, b4 t: u
other 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go8 G5 f5 s) M1 v3 }+ Q+ `
together of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that1 l1 d, X3 r: ~- W2 M7 Y4 H
Piss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were; f# d/ d' `: i2 S _
certain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I
# H b- h7 i8 n9 C: J/ Ndon't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such* p- C4 i. k4 b( k6 k b: a
stupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now.": F P* `# Z1 j+ P- L C& a, r, X
And, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more5 i9 K3 @" H ~1 u
accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think; q& ~) P) P$ p7 v9 \
it takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very/ m! p) O4 B4 I& R
imprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to& o; f. u l' ]( B
hurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,
F8 u% X. b) D t0 v! m"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love
$ S! ]& t/ E- K) D2 c: Ithan 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is
1 F2 K R$ v4 b0 d7 ia great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but
1 {2 O2 m4 e5 I9 ~+ V: H# L/ n$ ~ uI like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for8 J% {, k: B- s9 y
the word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,
# s, w% J0 c0 @7 l' C# ?Sherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow."
. V8 [: ~) Z+ V+ `( z: X) @( rSo maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word.
7 K W3 M* E" SI hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any7 X0 D. Y& i/ F" e9 M
circumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even% f2 {4 ^9 ~9 V7 Y& @, I
clinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,
) o) O: L0 E }: |$ a$ ^& p: f* band Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out.0 c7 q r" J( f( {
But there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words.
0 N. V3 P* c ~7 vRemember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock
& v' X5 z1 u8 i" O# ]3 OCROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in
& N6 T ?- V4 L0 qthe bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for, d; U. a6 M( f! ~" u4 ~
Kirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't
/ O0 w( a: {( D, B& Y/ psay "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding& m- I1 ^$ w8 S+ m
them. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that
0 E! g* c" X3 q0 ~" _' @goes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You
5 s/ {. |( p, q5 X5 l# \# ccan prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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