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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
3 C" X. W" R8 m& f/ Zbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was+ W. H. ~+ y! `- q y
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English9 ]! f. ~( I& p4 y0 {1 x, C
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
. u& [; l* H& d& z' _: J$ splan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".% ~3 C2 `, m) u( c( D
# B* J, y+ Z- A0 n) e; LIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
) @& Y3 `7 T$ W0 V# `5 Y! e# dthe sivil servants jump with joy.5 D" j" Y* Y5 Q; ]4 n
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
& `+ N; F! T/ K+ V k; akonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter." V) q! M4 N: `
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
/ k" t. Y" N; v2 Ztroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
5 E, ?6 ^9 o, `, Vfotograf 20% shorter.6 Q; V, A- d1 X% ]. m
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to& m7 B$ v: ^! Z3 c7 \
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.2 x1 V5 b0 a" B# W- Z
0 E5 I, Q0 K# sGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always9 C! M( u* j+ W
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
/ _( } S. o$ Rdisgrasful and it should go away.
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1 \. G5 U" Z1 N) ?# [, fBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
$ d2 b9 I- i2 M, {"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and0 \6 Q8 v/ a5 z5 C1 ^! q Y( `- w
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl., c4 e! c0 F6 ]8 T. C: u% G
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu- H* E5 t. t7 t1 d/ c/ [
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.; Q: Y% |3 j8 f- B$ W2 n
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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