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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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& a: W* `5 K' [/ h0 k, y& dTwas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house) j& A. ^( M7 T
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
8 t: D% V( ]. {- x7 @She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,2 I5 `; r; n3 G1 \2 ^# s- C! s
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
" Q# W2 T7 D. ]: NHe’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.
% z, f" J# P0 k4 N5 `( EWoman after woman stepped up and confessed.- V/ B& U4 Q# T( p
He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,- Z+ v+ S5 z0 f' U% L& c
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
: F6 d3 F, ]1 S8 I; i! g* m" R, LFrom the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,( Q0 S7 J d. Z1 q- @4 t& B
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.+ E' V# b% T; k: z* e! u$ N
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,2 X, r4 I$ p- V3 n; |2 o
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts./ F2 ] Y8 ?8 m4 n8 C# i4 m$ v# D
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
- {, s l- A, c: e F" y) VTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden ., ]9 U8 n' n% z$ P j/ \$ C% P
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
: N3 J! E: s; t( ?9 E1 L8 ?" F"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
7 d8 H4 p% a' T% _2 K9 r9 l- l; vShe’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
5 y1 D- Z8 g2 \1 yHer prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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