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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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; i5 j5 j* L2 v5 _2 ]Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
9 q c( r# Z. @ a: L6 l& NTiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.- j/ l f4 z: f9 S+ \3 \
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,, Z/ g+ }8 ~6 l' J- \
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.3 \) b# ^0 V: e. q8 z# ~6 P% ~7 m! N" d
He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.+ u8 R0 y! ~' H. x
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
% u& F# u. }4 fHe’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
$ E9 d( g$ _/ E3 C' E: o# A& eWith Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
y# n- S& M+ Y+ @From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues, Y0 c) k$ ?9 d8 R8 m
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news." U3 w- ]% ~& G( F0 G+ e1 O m
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
# a2 m1 B0 g1 {; _' L \When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
0 I: @1 e+ y) `# _Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
, x7 H6 F/ W* P: u- S$ RTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .9 Y# ]% a L* K( }) V9 p
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,5 B5 D# k1 M; U; {" X" ^" r, f/ j
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."& o6 f9 _3 j3 ]; k1 \" g+ S
She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
: O" t7 C- K! T- B9 ]- mHer prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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