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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.7 T1 x" V6 H: E/ M
# N6 I/ K1 b2 L; G# D2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
6 ]2 U M2 C: J6 @/ rhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday$ ?% g8 j3 g. O6 X( r* ?) j- `
morning., ^5 Y9 x* H& Y+ [
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,- h$ ?# h5 t; W c" H2 P% a, \5 ~
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a) v9 X0 O% R0 J
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its! i/ p8 j" r6 P; o5 b/ b2 M) {' X! D
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
. c2 N, d9 X% O( D9 Smuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
( Y* M) T# \/ T# M2 x9 o& ~go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell& e0 T$ Y/ z: u3 h+ p
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.% \2 s o- V- a1 ^, u% n; v; ?: Q- f/ S
; k8 ^. @# h1 J9 b5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
# d I5 v: e" S4 M' V5 c# O% Y# r t" }cussed out, and possibly shot., O+ a. l6 q+ [1 p
1 T# c) C3 O9 K/ Y6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can1 x m( F; I$ I, g7 |
get you shot.
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2 T" U2 T3 v) m1 v4 [. H \3 U7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that3 D6 B* G& f% p, Q5 ^' M0 D y
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at9 K* A" X' c0 ^$ @' J+ T
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
! h/ B1 d1 e/ m) @8 k: L, Fyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
4 H Z; r4 {; w+ mvehicle through the intersection.8 f5 p0 t* {8 h" a# R, P
5 }0 h8 C8 X- O1 e6 h3 U8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
! Z$ N/ V& y& b9 D) J4 r0 Tbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next2 q6 V+ u. [/ ^; Q m3 H, @4 h
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
2 @0 b+ g& }6 g' ?* M2 H) x$ V& Ymore construction starts everyday.5 `: e, G' d3 W1 D0 w& k( q$ X9 L
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,# K7 F" b$ v F9 t* C- h7 b) U
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
, t- b; u1 \8 u7 C8 _' w2 h! R8 Rsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items. A6 A! m. \5 ^0 x( u
( ~) m# |) }, g* p/ J# X10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
. @0 W8 v$ N- x7 l: groad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
: g7 A! i Y4 K6 q. i H7 Q" cRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and" Y: h6 Q) n% t* V/ }- r" ~3 J
66 Street are also the same road; got it?4 M6 p9 p8 u- L# J; U
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the, ]$ z3 K3 ]& x* Q- C4 |
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally( J2 r0 a2 @0 m8 w$ W
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,8 a2 @0 q7 C# h; W1 Y* ^2 n
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
: B* f, s5 L2 s/ \$ {! R/ `$ Haccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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4 }- v9 _6 u7 F- K- L9 n8 C/ B& ?13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
6 P* @+ U$ q/ V( wlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and2 C# x+ T: D4 h& P: D- |# I
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
