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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
! A; f8 }) |8 t. }hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,$ g& E" }/ h8 ^1 |2 p! f% j. `$ [
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
4 ^5 Z+ j: c; R7 y/ f' d$ I- [9 ?7 Ulanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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3 P- R! @8 M1 x4 E; Z4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its9 g# F- [; }: }# W3 x; h+ o
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest9 M! Y( R, H- P; @# `8 [3 {6 F! y
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
% e: u/ T! Q% g" _+ w$ s8 Dgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell2 I3 q, y! L$ a$ T7 B3 p% ^
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.9 X4 J8 d/ s) S$ s! S
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,7 ~4 C* u9 L5 S+ }7 D* E2 J. Y* F
cussed out, and possibly shot.2 [6 v& V# w# W6 S/ Y& E4 ^
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
2 W3 Y/ S" u* fget you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
# ^# R/ {& H* V5 \- h4 ^ f+ qhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
2 s+ e& u* `" q j; p4 u( B6 f g$ Cthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot( s+ ], R; X6 T) z8 B1 G5 A
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
. t8 C& `5 i0 N* W- |& |: ivehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
2 J# `; F5 i; {# q \1 v, {! Ibarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next" C- |, r* g# Q" U- ~7 V( V
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and" e" T" C9 W q- m {1 v& }
more construction starts everyday.
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: R; A! N2 s7 B2 P- W3 y+ L3 T9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
* j9 B# a( g1 L0 P2 ]; Ydeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
# m( V$ G1 P6 P" s; qsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.. j! Y' o3 O. l+ n
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same/ K5 t2 j8 t/ R$ h* j
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye* b" }" j1 E4 p9 `; n9 a8 ]
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
' }6 S$ b( L9 [7 L$ w/ F: Y# _66 Street are also the same road; got it?& m4 S& B3 I# w4 F
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
o3 l: Q6 J) Kshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
+ ]% X; f9 i( l0 N/ ^; {0 V% }9 BActivated.'
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4 T3 V6 m/ u7 W/ G" P- ]6 P( [12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,; G8 C3 C5 I4 D6 x2 T
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'0 p# [( `) [- O9 Z V7 d3 _( K
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot., o" L$ ]1 X6 v7 G% ~
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
* p3 {* l0 y2 A0 L- Q2 W$ j6 tlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
5 i' S |' v5 Q' j$ k' _blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
