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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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9 J- B& Q" V4 W, ]; v( q, }1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush7 ]8 c4 J( ]/ |7 W( S( r
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday& P! V2 I5 t8 ^2 k8 s2 \+ L0 l0 N
morning.! Z" P9 L$ `% {- s- {$ E
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,% `- A$ Q* f3 ]' D2 a# z- A7 G* y
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
# C8 C) q& ? [3 Jlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'. J) w0 T: r* D! o9 |7 i* Y" o
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
' k9 G: T. `! N# \4 S+ k3 wown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest/ Q G2 q. X9 r0 d8 E3 Z
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
2 u! M6 N, @0 s$ s- P2 [go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell D% ?) H8 B& {$ _7 y( j6 v1 V, Z
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.0 d; P( F3 ^4 [
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
* g/ L( i- ?' D$ kcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can o: A; i' S' f" k
get you shot.# k4 I2 W( `9 F3 y$ s' J
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that. ]! n( ?) F+ ] M$ u: T9 i
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at9 W; A4 T! q6 h: p
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
6 w/ c( m6 S( ~" f# B, Cyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first1 h9 x; q$ H# j; B( K& A8 g6 m
vehicle through the intersection.4 B. s8 I' f6 j) C ?
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour1 L2 A0 P' W1 `. t! d6 M- q
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next$ {- G% Q+ }- M A& R
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
+ {( a( H0 b$ O Q9 Z7 `3 ^more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,3 b* L( C% \* n- d: m* `+ Q
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,% q, C; ^& S: r" F3 }1 u" M* o2 E6 u% p
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.% G# @" @9 H, ^* N, `
4 s2 A D( c; V, f10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
8 _6 G" J" X3 aroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
4 r' `# I4 ?2 x0 N# lRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and; ]0 Z) q; a4 A- |3 |
66 Street are also the same road; got it?' z5 N6 M+ ~5 R5 D# ^: `
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the' r- V! w$ p i5 k+ f' E: e6 m) V! D
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,/ t4 d- B8 K8 H* r5 j) ^
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
, O: v8 f3 d* Q" xaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.5 z$ r& k* Z2 j! a( {
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
+ f+ P7 J' I2 R) hlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
4 E$ X, B, d" T, e( \blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
