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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
8 |0 d4 F }9 m3 e+ Vhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday/ [- j( ^% K- t( r/ ]1 P
morning.
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! t% ~2 R6 @, R1 {3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,3 v6 r* D" z6 e+ q+ B! l$ r
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a1 P% D- K' o q& J
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'., T9 y( l' i$ R0 U$ h
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
2 V% S2 X- s: t" @5 ~( Pown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
& m" C% M# S6 Z; L7 \+ xmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
/ w5 U1 w8 c! ygo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
: T. L& E0 P4 I, ^- ?7 Qphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.% L' g% _/ W. U# J
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
: K3 ^3 j' T, j3 @1 W3 Y3 dcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can0 L+ q$ O! ^) a( g: i( f) g
get you shot.7 }! H. e2 g( J& R
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that: G e' k1 x+ B% \ s4 d) g2 n
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at. J& E4 m4 C6 E1 j, r8 C7 P
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot4 o0 j" o: _! `5 P. H
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first4 a/ E; X/ a5 h9 ~8 F" u
vehicle through the intersection.& s" g' Q! ]! _. f n
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
" h4 i; |2 q6 p$ O* @! fbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
7 z! u& M( s6 U3 O" k1 ?day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and: p" x# v/ R7 f: c# t \
more construction starts everyday.$ O: g# ]( z2 ~0 z
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,1 i( h' g5 c: z8 A
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
$ n( a/ B7 E3 ]: F8 ^7 @squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.2 O7 j+ X/ V; `! h
0 m& Z( n3 X, \ \) E10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same- ^4 Z$ `$ h: C4 P& j5 t
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
% G/ U5 Y2 B$ P/ p* H% L8 dRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and$ M) d% d n9 a
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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( d; Z2 _( D' K" b- [+ L3 m: l11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the. B+ o3 W/ R& c$ q* ]; T- Q
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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1 J# u. s) H0 i12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,# C% A; k) z' g- q3 W9 H1 y2 h
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
* U8 ~: `, u" Q! f: daccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.; i5 b" ^. p) W9 v1 V' W$ q
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur) w1 S$ o4 L k$ \
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and& [) E* h; s4 ]- F- G! r) A; |5 E
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
