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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:, A, m3 z9 m h/ Y
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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& C% z: j: L4 Y# v. A0 U2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
7 G( X5 ?8 y; s0 f9 uhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday6 l- y5 e U; m4 [" r' k& ]
morning.% A9 m! ]8 I7 K6 B! V' M a
! C [) {3 h. O2 q5 g3 i5 l: W& a3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
$ E4 S; S& }: Tyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a+ T& z! U* O( E
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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7 i& v `+ a4 u8 P4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
1 R ^+ T5 i7 v# X( T( X( U5 H rown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest8 q) Q3 b( k# V/ _# K8 j
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
: C5 a- w8 |5 D: m' I# f" o& Kgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell) ]! V9 P$ [5 Z, C$ s
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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6 u {$ N* x) O% p5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
5 B1 `0 v5 e0 N4 B: Acussed out, and possibly shot.0 Y2 u5 E3 O s( ], Z' g" D
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can8 G1 ]* I2 A* T, C. {- X
get you shot.
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- L/ F3 g4 L, T( b4 e/ ^0 I0 ~ q7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that; q, W: J0 e. G3 F/ T9 ?
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
" W4 w, [% H0 _7 z3 jthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
9 B1 a3 Q2 L6 e& c! d9 Yyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
3 b3 q) `) k; N6 v! ~vehicle through the intersection.6 z, {9 X2 C5 A/ c, B" I
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
! B# R7 a3 N6 @" y9 p7 c ?' Lbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next2 [7 H/ U6 Z" I U* W4 L1 u
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and" z/ k* L0 i4 l* _( w
more construction starts everyday.- o- X; k1 m1 D7 G5 p- I9 N
3 u( J5 V, o2 x O4 P# i' n6 Y% I9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
5 _9 E" m% f) U1 }deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,2 E5 H, O% y$ \* P
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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) j* ?3 A6 y- x7 o7 F8 R10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same' ^8 s9 t" ^; B
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
. Q, G2 S# L% L! j. w3 sRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and2 S$ \& E/ N8 M! T
66 Street are also the same road; got it?2 G8 P' ?& s- j: S/ o4 U) H
. Z! i/ A" R9 ]" w( S; b11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the4 X# r8 W' ]+ y, d: H
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
% P5 D9 X2 n6 @; ^4 N0 x) NActivated.'
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$ Y/ Y) M! Z4 M5 D5 i' m12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,# Y% {, h" P; `3 X
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
8 e8 I4 P' U& E3 Q2 K& a9 r) Q5 Taccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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2 V6 M9 _; [# @' r7 H13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
3 c8 t' Z# t& \+ \1 \! C; klined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
( ]- b4 ^: d; C$ N8 Kblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
