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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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( r3 t5 J7 }9 T5 }1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.) I7 y1 T" Z8 n/ l9 \! b
5 w1 X# |4 A8 d' [8 v9 l3 Y+ o# [2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush" ]/ {) L- [, I% F2 D" D. {7 g2 `, z
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
2 N2 h! F: Y# L0 J" |0 Omorning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
& S# w$ J& I$ j8 ?5 ?0 i9 tyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
( s% ^! z; B9 x' s4 }1 s. Llanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.% U; E1 Z" X% a! e" d6 i
5 U& R. Y l+ [0 R4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its) p3 O1 ?7 ^9 w8 n' ?$ v$ E2 _
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest! e2 z9 Z+ {" ^3 A7 Y4 G B+ \% y+ r
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires2 e0 P9 n9 p" e8 r. m
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell5 d- d& F: M( E2 z+ p
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
- _) n% P+ |7 mcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
" x Y& Q8 q0 w. Uget you shot.2 t. W) ~- S% a0 P, ~. N) N% I( M2 O( e! Z
. P/ C& k2 } c9 ]5 Z/ S8 }4 R7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that/ i. g S, p, Q9 |, L" {4 e
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at" v4 d$ R/ \" }( l- k3 A
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot+ L, d7 X9 I" i# l% q' k. m
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first0 t. V7 s9 c" L# W4 b
vehicle through the intersection.( Z0 l9 t+ e1 C
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour6 ^& S$ d+ Y$ r1 Q$ ~2 |
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
' ~, @1 X8 n% z( W/ w% d1 R5 X W, Lday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
/ }7 L- s: e" D1 h9 Imore construction starts everyday.' t5 k9 y! x V' l1 V
: Z ^; l) t4 k% {( A, T% ]9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
8 t/ d( H. e/ y3 V6 hdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,0 q. j& u; {% T b @% t0 j. r
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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) p6 d4 {8 q9 c2 i1 i* D; a10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same2 J8 j5 F& }. _! t! X) O
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye/ C1 _9 G# m% M( L6 G6 ~* V
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and8 K+ S% o; i! x. \! ?
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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9 o- V6 B( Y3 b5 k' ?5 \; q11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the$ A6 S# \- L- Z$ t
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally3 s- h- U" S6 V. h
Activated.'
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5 O: U( c! N4 p4 l* X12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
# e5 U/ e% h @; W+ ?1 I" ~you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'. j+ x# |$ G n5 [- f" v
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur: _9 d% a5 k+ Y b L
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and9 K8 }6 }8 k7 u/ _& t4 {* M
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
