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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:5 g$ b, t( @ Z1 I( |
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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& r; I3 Y i5 H" D2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
& N6 H0 B# B% ohour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
/ y: M, F% h' Y+ Mmorning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,0 e5 ?9 g6 c$ h) Z) ~
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a# Q( k0 U$ t$ x! b z# g
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.( K) A7 M7 T$ F4 B6 L( Q
3 K/ ^6 k" q* `2 ?4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its3 O9 X# L/ p6 j8 w
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest8 y- V& V4 R% d% G, }6 [/ {
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires( f3 u3 p% H+ r) z; g7 [
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
$ I! b5 M: R; h/ Y/ v( K# v4 m6 h5 aphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.8 S" F0 ?% ^- Z+ w) c
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
# l4 \6 P0 S4 H k7 t; wcussed out, and possibly shot.$ o, E# K7 d2 ? _+ O
q' }* {) I6 f6 \6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can; n8 y& X" u* y& }. |3 R" U3 K
get you shot.
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. |3 ` u$ ]2 Q7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
" ]8 s4 r" J; W5 k9 z& lhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
" V' T* Z n- ?/ S$ |5 U8 p. ythe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
, v b. }5 B* T/ Hyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first+ C/ I5 w) s9 `' R) C1 e# {
vehicle through the intersection.& R! l7 T% D& \+ E: K
! ]. q# g2 o; R1 Y8 N8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour: X5 h% m* H6 `: B q/ o: F
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
0 P4 m! D2 U- p9 d$ g& o1 Aday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
" `- n& D+ t: e& p; s0 I4 Smore construction starts everyday.# ?+ @0 n& w( ?( G+ T# F9 l
2 L5 A! Q5 z6 |4 g2 e% ?) ?9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,& z+ c! J5 J, w9 z/ \# _9 y5 W1 N
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,, h" d: x, e# Z. c% [
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.2 j6 J4 O2 m9 u8 t7 U, h7 x6 z
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same* R# z" \2 r/ H/ w1 {" K; ]4 R7 Z# l
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
n! T% ^) r. N- @Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and/ K$ \( J$ F, | t
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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) A# p$ Z* B, C9 e/ K11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
' R; e6 N) n, u6 o! b0 r8 hshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally' @, h; z. b, L0 e: V$ f3 \
Activated.', r" i4 h, U1 {9 u% f
O0 G* C5 y7 ^- ~& z/ Q12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,# X! N3 I: i% I( ~: _& T, k
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
: O, G# \3 E' r: l& P0 `accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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( V9 L3 p- x0 c; s8 M9 _% [13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur3 T# j; ~- w( ~$ O% I4 S6 B; ]4 f
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
6 d, h) h, [" ^" jblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
