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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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8 K( V: ~. ]5 [4 O( j' H% |& j0 y2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
' U$ u! q, c* A0 vhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
% j! A" f- i2 |- c, [. v! x8 k4 `, Vmorning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
1 j) ]; j: a# C" ?you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a$ {" v$ c+ y5 |8 @; v" F! `
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its3 \. ~0 B0 P0 A- [ T
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest$ B @& ^' V% A0 ]8 {. ^0 q$ u+ ^
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
+ d6 g- ?8 o4 c) ^$ R( p; igo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell9 k7 O0 K- q/ Q% V
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.3 U8 S5 w: S& j2 U
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
; i; W; Q& c5 o/ Dcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can1 }0 D* {8 p- T; W! c' L$ S* y
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that m2 S! y3 s& Z3 H) i2 ^6 O
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
/ `' x1 Q+ |$ t0 R k/ hthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
; y( n3 R" B( _$ m! s" x% n" ]/ Xyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
+ v6 m2 N* m3 e* [) j2 o6 {vehicle through the intersection.4 {, y; L. e9 s1 S6 [. v8 b
$ {* U) s# P& M5 N8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
: H2 `# e' X. u$ ?* _! q! `( Xbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
5 X. _% Y+ t, i- i# lday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and" M) {5 V: q. U, S; I
more construction starts everyday.
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' \ ~: c4 ^0 Z0 [' R; [6 m9 R9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
! x1 g. A& _2 T& g0 ]0 ddeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,; Z$ N% g- V5 Q6 r
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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1 v. g' S# L3 u* j7 H6 M10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same: u6 W. H9 _1 U6 ~8 O- q
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
. R+ u% A0 e9 R8 ZRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
8 P& v' o6 _- U# \8 [. z66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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' q2 Z- {% t1 G) ]8 H/ ~% a. x+ n11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
' z" [+ S4 {5 o# Bshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally8 o( W" P4 C2 }) r0 g! R4 Y
Activated.'( a/ f; @7 R- i5 E1 w
; w' ^& o% }5 j* D# ?' N12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,, J& q* d/ u; o6 s8 P. R
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
' n3 x/ N; M5 j9 a9 naccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.: K& n7 J! r8 t2 g
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur7 [" x" O- R3 G- W) J5 B% }
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and8 O! L# V! h. p5 }; I9 L, l' X
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
