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ZT: Important New Rules for Driving in Edmonton

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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:- {# t) z) _, n& i
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush% n( Q* c1 }& q6 ]( i$ e2 \
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday3 ^* L# f& j! y7 b4 l) z3 I
morning.& |, K( |+ {1 h3 n7 a  }
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,% U0 l, D( a( Y" t# B0 E* g
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
! `. q1 L4 M8 r  \. q2 Blanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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  N& `6 v# T5 O0 H4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
8 J8 W* T3 z+ g1 u* qown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest  q' M1 c2 F2 b" _, g
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires8 u+ e0 k; o0 N0 j6 J* X: A
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell" D+ I& ^0 g7 ]& U/ }
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.8 y# c# u/ O: ], z- Y( y9 Y

3 k) o& G# U, K/ l; N1 T5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,) P; j/ e7 l  A
cussed out, and possibly shot.: Z) r+ I  |% `% {- k
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
% b$ E! ?3 j! N4 w. m6 ~$ wget you shot.$ {( q: ~- m. J3 W* q- f

+ _  B% Y: F4 ]7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that0 y+ B* Q) u2 U7 D! f, _
has  turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at6 l7 S5 g! B/ r7 Z  k0 V/ {
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot* D& v$ L8 _+ n: }' Q
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
) n4 i/ y) v' O! a& Yvehicle through the intersection.3 m& r6 R5 a9 L. r+ ?; V
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour% U! V- D* o( t
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next4 O; K3 B2 G" q, {  K% v  @
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and- m, D$ |; a0 `. P
more construction starts everyday.
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, Q$ H0 F- T' p9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
$ [- m/ b9 R1 ]1 b2 |: C  ydeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
) w# ]2 |( E2 @1 V: X! Rsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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  O7 q' h# Z/ ]! F4 T10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
8 m# _; r, l* _+ wroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye7 b8 z( m7 _8 m+ u; \
Road  are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and& ]. \& N9 K  \! W3 S  |0 Q4 K- J$ s0 g
66 Street are also the same road; got it?! F& J; D+ R9 O. y$ @

7 C9 H+ e& T' F: G! U11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
+ p. j  }! F6 A4 v  nshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally: d8 Q  y8 T; d) |. m+ b" l
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,; i$ |* Q8 h/ \# g& J. T, P1 Z, k
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'( I. f, t- }( }0 ~5 c! |! F
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.$ I) t; j  l* F/ ]  X8 a0 a$ `  m
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur' z0 z. F) Q: X
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:29 | 显示全部楼层
Funny but true in Edmonton. Where did you get this stuff?
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55 | 显示全部楼层
靠,还真对
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发表于 2010-2-17 11:24 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
刚以为真的呢,乐了半天“The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph”& M+ i3 W- O+ h$ J% L* {

& P  n7 }# V: l8 R% R; J- n后来发现是搞笑
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2010-2-17 14:26 | 显示全部楼层
真是那么回事儿.我在左转的时候,经常被后车按喇叭.黄灯的时候,有直行车开过来,我怎么知道他停不停?一般我都等直行车停了,再走,所以经常被按喇叭.原来还生气,后来都耐受了,随便按吧.
大型搬家
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发表于 2010-2-17 16:36 | 显示全部楼层
5# irish 4 ~* D1 r4 A; I; p5 p/ ^
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it happens a lot
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发表于 2010-2-20 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
以前我在edmonton的时候也这么想,可是搬到ontario以后才发现爱城的只能算小儿科。
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发表于 2010-2-21 15:03 | 显示全部楼层
厚脸皮,厚脸皮。
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