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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:0 Y% E# I8 [, A: |4 U' W
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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! r+ I" i2 t( W2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush: w- d3 P- @+ R2 E$ A. T! C8 e
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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+ O$ V) M v/ h4 k* Q6 L; z3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
+ D* c0 S, Y" s* J( z1 Eyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
0 {$ P3 K2 n' Slanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'." k7 r) R* M6 K
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its- z3 I2 R2 q1 Q6 G$ R. ~! T
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest. V+ J [& T3 w2 e
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
9 `0 {: e- H' y3 igo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
) [( ^. ?- `+ [9 ]phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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# V& j' J+ F1 f1 I$ ]7 B5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, B6 J. p$ P: r
cussed out, and possibly shot.6 q5 [* H/ I: }- W2 n
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can: v# Q# y% o: P, F- a- ] q& [% T
get you shot.
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1 T) P* Z7 H5 J7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
1 V4 S/ G/ s1 c! n. I# M& a/ ohas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at$ T! ~# _6 _% i
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
/ e& {: Z3 V5 g( }" K/ [% ayou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first$ Y8 l" E0 x' B* P
vehicle through the intersection.! k A1 A3 p R8 t
6 \6 n6 a S- |1 v" Q- j8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour: J$ n) A, D) Z2 V2 a, v
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next& s. j! `. c1 ~7 [
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and, }( k4 b# l4 U- V
more construction starts everyday.4 }: i: `; i9 I( Z0 n+ c. @1 k. M
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,/ G7 x) ^2 R2 x. F! M/ H" k5 Z
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
! H* u# B4 ]4 j0 [4 lsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.0 C* O* c [0 j+ n
9 j) d; C. x g* R10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same- Z4 T9 i# N# ~
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye5 v, A. Q; L& b9 g7 y3 X0 Y4 I
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and) R$ Z0 _2 l; |8 e2 e7 P0 e
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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' {% M" }# a( C7 ~0 n' _, b11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
1 B# ]# h; e) z2 y6 X# J* O, t8 F. Gshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
9 o. q; b- [ v4 @. U& o$ P; ~$ e; |Activated.'
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- a- a/ k) T( m9 A& h! V+ s12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,. O! G: W: j3 R8 }4 l
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
7 c8 d% }; f9 }6 [# ?+ W& V7 Waccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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- s6 O! P2 h+ m4 Z13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur# Q$ V. E& P5 K* w5 `0 t
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and1 c% Q4 F$ v$ U$ }2 ?; Z
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
