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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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% u4 r6 j* l' l# S2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush3 u2 f' \% N# U7 B0 r; }' X- h
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday7 q9 @" N C8 l2 t$ u5 E0 c
morning.
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& T: c3 q: b) a. m) u3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,0 V! L* G: p" Z5 R) b# t0 o7 q+ p3 i
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a" s+ P7 L6 l5 ~+ q+ I
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
3 e2 i$ _' Y& J% Kown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest7 A8 D6 v& j1 A. v2 u( q7 W+ x
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires/ H6 ^/ Y2 }6 |3 I: F2 J& Y$ W
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell/ _: n( w6 K7 e& Z# i: D% U& g
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
( x) e4 O7 O( V) }' B- Ycussed out, and possibly shot.) l* f1 T' e0 F% o5 @; J
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can) f; v- \3 l7 \7 S. ^; H. R2 O# o2 {3 H
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
& W" t9 g' C4 a: T$ ?) l xhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
/ T" U6 q8 ]5 H+ c4 Hthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot: `: f# p/ G4 d
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first$ ~. w: Q0 ]7 r0 Y# u
vehicle through the intersection.8 h6 [" I8 Z8 G: D5 }
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour6 Y" _1 z/ E# P% g8 T$ a2 h9 v3 s
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next6 {" G2 q }* n2 x, n
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and0 z5 V5 p) b+ C# ]" y# Z5 H
more construction starts everyday.
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3 v/ R% p2 @" z ]% A5 K9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
* z8 i; N' x, S/ Fdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,1 C3 e/ o5 N2 f# G
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
+ }5 Y& {2 C `9 Q# j# t$ Aroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye* Y- f! Q( D! v6 P8 r
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and! \. ~% O* U6 h+ K$ [/ t* A/ S- O, a
66 Street are also the same road; got it?0 B a% d+ q _
7 e2 ]& \+ @. g3 w11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
) y S% _: l2 v x. a: Rshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally+ A8 i6 s& R J j, s+ u
Activated.'
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. a; p8 V# g) p4 N$ o5 _9 Z12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
% A( u3 C1 L2 F) yyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
% \% L; E6 ]. gaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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- p+ |9 H1 \1 c. ^+ {13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
3 |. j0 J2 y, o% Xlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and/ v* Z0 Q7 [# X% W, B( `; i* ^
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
