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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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/ Y# y( B) o* S W: M8 T1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush+ d3 V- X) Y/ x3 c: G- R
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday6 r! Q- V" H& {. |1 `& M( V) X6 b$ H
morning.9 d6 m/ I1 T$ D9 @$ W6 L
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,3 e5 G- M. S& O3 \
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
3 a. C! O5 G" T8 ?& Nlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.8 P& I+ y/ E2 ~
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
2 q# Y# t+ g6 Y4 h5 Xown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
6 q( g9 b5 o+ Y$ w. Hmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires$ }( \" }4 b V$ M1 Q
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
4 C a- Q9 X; K. A) Bphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,9 d7 c# c6 {5 B7 a
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can1 { `' m F9 |, w O9 P
get you shot.5 ] l6 g1 V! U- V) T
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
0 A# i) r Y! u' w$ P% f3 mhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at& s+ S0 p0 t. x r
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
# c7 W' S' Z: V8 Iyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first1 P" e# N. y. v8 B. s
vehicle through the intersection.
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9 g' y' k3 m) F# B8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour8 X/ K$ u" G# w) H
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next3 z$ v% Q0 L3 ]) B; m
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
+ G" [& A& E. p+ F/ zmore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,8 G* d' ~' P# y( {
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
- I! Y' T& X) p4 k! P5 Vsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items. b0 Y7 }: ?2 ?# Z+ m
1 z) q0 a4 [- e10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
# k- [! z$ B/ ?8 r4 P8 Hroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye7 I2 @0 r6 O; k
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
# I# e; H/ N" R. w66 Street are also the same road; got it?: }) b/ F) u% n
7 g3 C% o: @ x# l6 Q. ?11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
( o4 K1 s; [, U. M& Wshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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2 ^' T% E5 p6 k# L12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone," o% ^" i2 s/ d4 m" |0 ^- k0 H
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
; x0 u( G+ W# h5 v0 Gaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
4 [5 p% ?' V. Mlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and* y! K9 X9 z7 m5 ~
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
