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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON: ?! Y( i: Q U* u. q$ E( f! c4 P
& Q% F0 X0 N+ L1 o' r1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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5 i" n% F3 E" z$ O& s. ]' d2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
2 I$ `6 A+ n2 O1 j9 Dhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
7 h+ U. F7 F% M& f: m+ E. U( emorning.5 Y0 v* l% r+ }- h8 [ ]* \5 g, |* p
- o. [/ C9 @9 n3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,; {8 t! n$ F% Z5 u1 i+ P. c8 b, N
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a5 m2 t8 C; T' }& p3 y
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
3 `7 ~0 O M( Y0 wown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest' S% m+ \3 ?% l% _: S, w# m
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
7 y+ u, |8 c4 s% A( c! [go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell3 v: r8 v$ b9 D4 H' W# W, d% W( ~
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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# l$ N& b' q; D3 }9 ] G* e0 @$ z3 _: f5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
9 d, s! U W1 k" M- a1 Y. B6 `cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can6 G/ F# O9 H ~5 x/ [7 w
get you shot.1 _4 t+ z3 h: ^1 M% d
7 U; s8 V) e0 }7 [( d2 e7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that1 z% v& r; g: F# w! @: l- c* p# x4 m
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
0 k2 {& c% H" t4 f& W5 z! d9 o, h' Tthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot1 J" s1 q5 N* T# x4 H, m* x% |
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
9 l/ k, \) J- p" b5 Uvehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
0 G' J$ c% K5 K/ U7 K& K# nbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
) a8 y2 f1 |. w6 z6 U2 L8 lday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
4 S! I) \ x8 j8 w# i- jmore construction starts everyday.
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3 f: W& {! W- }8 D9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
" l1 M4 g1 H$ @8 ydeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
2 J7 k9 `3 q3 S1 bsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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) Q+ \8 h2 T4 V' Q9 J10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
) L# e6 o5 X0 \, b( Nroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
, ~) q/ u" i4 @: i6 R9 F8 O2 H( RRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
$ Y9 K. [( `, ~, I+ v7 M66 Street are also the same road; got it?+ J* |* Z6 @" O6 K5 R% k
4 B) C3 ]7 w# Y+ v11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
6 R1 m2 v' l) sshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
) \' f% a @+ @% Y6 AActivated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
. t$ M: G4 u4 |8 q% U* z1 wyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'( R; b4 Q# w( q" P4 Q% U5 W
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.: t4 h1 L' U6 o5 {. x# A* G) ?7 D
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
" B7 |+ a! _3 c' q7 E# z+ N3 \8 ^lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and& _; D( b" Y/ |
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
