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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:3 J! U2 j0 b5 a( b- m1 q/ G
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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8 O+ ?! }% b/ ^1 R2 w5 `2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
; X" P$ w( S$ E$ _7 o$ Ohour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,( M' ]- [% e$ Z: o0 ~* `' ]% \
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a( F J1 D. O$ ?" g7 `; O* k6 a1 e
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4 w# z0 y2 d2 s) ~8 v4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
" r6 m* }5 b; C2 M6 qown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
: j6 p4 z; I! C9 |# V3 _3 |muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires; V {) m2 a( A( O) N
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
" W1 k: y7 G0 a$ [1 Mphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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3 a& a/ S! l; H: I$ @3 g5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
: ]3 \, L+ R8 kcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
C- P8 M! O7 Y/ \get you shot. ?5 }) d7 ]! [2 t2 a6 L
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that% N* C' n' ^/ E2 h& ?) }
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
- h2 K) J4 E+ H& b @8 tthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
& o; {. ]& ^; C Q( v( byou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first+ Y, k8 i0 }6 e" n* I: G& S5 j8 z* U
vehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
8 i1 f9 t: X7 k; Xbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
1 ]. f% K( E9 l6 Kday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
7 ]' c" k6 B* ^8 }+ E7 {7 V( l. i5 Wmore construction starts everyday.; L7 b6 x" h+ S: z8 y. [* c
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
% N0 X& P1 I% q; d$ s7 Wdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,' N0 W+ V% ~' Z" Q4 ]' ^6 z5 D
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.4 r% I6 P2 k% V i
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
; B0 J8 U% n/ [5 |0 groad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
7 |/ E( U: w# e! r4 }# @Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and* r( a6 ^- e8 T% D( ^2 c2 _
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the& b4 @0 s7 D, m* F9 j
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally# C) T0 w+ X5 O' y
Activated.'2 Y1 z% c& g9 M, U) t
+ e1 X& _- g/ f0 H9 x! p! |) N12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
! G6 K3 o! m Uyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
. D9 d% U( Y9 n$ W }# d+ kaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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: B3 x4 d s, L& u) c j0 `13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
2 z6 a3 n8 B9 a, \+ {6 f' p( B( Qlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and$ Q9 Y) ~$ L) _* i/ c& t
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
