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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:+ M5 T) N( R- ^; h5 O ^' A+ j7 z
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.2 X9 a+ J5 D3 K2 C6 ?# D
0 K D8 K Z; T6 Q4 V! ^2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
& o" g* D. D3 X/ \0 ]5 dhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday1 y; `0 j1 u$ V) [) i
morning.
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. y9 a1 H- P3 B3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
& Y7 c& @4 m/ S: i, Uyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a5 e4 T0 f8 v% w0 K3 L: V# J
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its4 I) e" ]) A2 b2 A
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest! w7 X$ K, A# S# p
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires! z* B* k1 I. v! a$ f# @% U
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell* f$ t' I0 z, W, \# {
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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3 `% k+ {+ w" ?2 ]5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
2 `- G6 w2 E: W0 Fcussed out, and possibly shot.
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- e* j" O. _* b4 o8 _ J6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
1 c8 I( S; j! f+ Qget you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that8 k% ?5 c2 G- j+ B% k2 G- i; a
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at8 Q0 E8 h( M+ j+ N
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
. l) f) T% c' v) j% |4 z1 Vyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
" Y$ t$ l, U: _+ U) i* w5 s9 nvehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
4 N5 Y6 S# f' }) I* Zbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next6 ~% x- h. M, M' c( B) ]
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
0 S% D$ i6 B6 {3 d3 Mmore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
8 j3 S3 H u( a& Zdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
+ q3 k7 l E0 _- u* T! m, ~' rsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items." Q( p) s6 g/ Z( s R
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same2 _$ H( s1 z, [5 q* W5 ~
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye+ o6 J. ]! W6 D. S7 \
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
. U2 U" n6 m) d0 ~66 Street are also the same road; got it?6 Y6 G, X) ?& c! m
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
6 H N. D) K7 J2 X3 Q' kshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
( H0 `; G7 H, _. H4 L- U* wActivated.'! F% c% B% ?! O; E+ D9 X/ [ O
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
/ g7 }" e% I! hyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'/ U1 ?0 |9 K& L* I& L R2 o
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.5 j3 [1 [1 @3 ]
/ }) p& S% P/ b9 I4 D3 g% a13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
9 Y- W8 Z7 f- Q, u2 ?lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
1 j- u, {: |0 bblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
