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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON: ]3 r6 o3 O& V) ^6 @' Q
) q* _7 O- l2 X( A* J1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.' y5 @/ M1 ~) l6 @: p s5 B
1 C& ^1 c+ p. a, R0 M$ r; i2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush3 ]3 U! T8 u5 M$ d0 ^( L5 |
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday7 {5 p9 ^& }6 m! K. R! [
morning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2, M, P9 z" i7 P6 }, y
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
. |. j, Y# i1 ~1 H# Flanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.7 S4 D& o5 e' O
. b4 q$ ^$ i6 O3 V4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
7 K0 c9 x/ ]8 \- P% I0 `# hown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest7 E* J9 x: m, d* \6 {& b
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
/ }! S) H- D$ C/ K vgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell( l; J; K* L3 X8 @8 e
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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( ?% s! b3 [$ x% r" m& i+ E5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
3 w f2 P$ ~+ `cussed out, and possibly shot.
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9 z8 }2 {5 e, x+ c% m4 ?6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can v$ P, s& P# u, c
get you shot.7 d7 f7 E" _$ a7 X+ w- Z0 ~0 n1 Y* Q9 {
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
5 _0 J8 n' T6 c* u: A& `has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
3 _. H v( [7 j( Y: q, H2 ythe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot$ ?# n/ T5 k2 e- w& D; F. C
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
" L5 I6 W5 F. X! L' g! J/ Gvehicle through the intersection.
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7 f r; J# f" @3 N5 l8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
0 P$ A3 s6 f* q- x2 abarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next5 s& Q$ p- o+ C& P& `
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and8 q, }2 m* r( V% g& K* o" i5 o* M
more construction starts everyday.
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/ t; G3 N2 U2 w U9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
1 W) ^: p) p) ^5 p0 @5 ]& Mdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
! N/ A1 i" w2 R; d; {squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.$ H6 C2 }/ `- E1 w k1 z1 z
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
% s1 S; G; b# V7 P. W( k- lroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
& U" z3 @' D, _: XRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
7 N. `& r+ b& z6 @66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
. d* Q# x/ ~! G. E5 S. w6 v! pshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
! o6 f* o" g- w- }6 p, v$ rActivated.'
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4 U2 U8 Q" H ?. G12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,5 R) U- f, s3 ^. c( d! q$ { D
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
, P) w( h- y$ C" v$ f2 J' t' S5 zaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.' S$ [: f- N$ } E1 a, |
# A0 d# N& F4 G, e13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur1 _4 g( {+ E. Z
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
3 C- \ W7 `7 a* `) i" m* `& N- E4 pblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
