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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:* P% S, j4 y6 }5 d; X- @4 E
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.3 l7 J& a# f/ i% y
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush6 T" I. [9 L7 Y
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
, G1 K k$ O6 m/ _ l1 I, O& z* \morning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
+ B. l0 ?( {3 u7 `you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
0 C. `7 H9 P- j- i J) S0 [3 [landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its3 [4 i, {4 Y8 }. W4 t
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest% _* J4 Z3 L) q- g8 e x: h$ {' Y
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
9 s+ `; Z9 y; k/ x* Cgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell4 V! y3 x7 w7 e6 [# n
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.3 E& f2 `* @2 J! d# n" u8 v% z" ]
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, @+ i5 o: y$ q1 ?* e+ Z
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can# ^" U! V) l: j1 E( K1 |
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
7 w) }% t% k/ b! @8 [& y+ B" _has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at) Z* [6 \/ _9 @- z2 ^
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot; a/ k. d1 b1 ~' G
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
I3 ~; d$ D( v% X1 X" D- @. lvehicle through the intersection.
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! S% a( b( F t3 ~8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour! v! o# M9 Q4 s: ]( _+ q: w
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
- a! M d- a' e. L: w7 ~day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
. E( K. ?/ G7 Gmore construction starts everyday.* n% k! w! `4 j: r3 g
* n& N8 ~# O: d9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
0 ~$ p: ~" W; W0 q, @deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage," |# Z; B+ a* l' ?* P; `3 J
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
0 v% {$ d, _% i8 rroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye2 ~( @9 I1 h' O5 y
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
' c( s( @, l7 k8 w, B4 I66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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3 Y: F; }7 Q0 `+ |- u11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the7 v- u% `5 G: j5 P
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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. V6 G/ K+ U/ x12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,8 s4 ?( ]% Z+ Q$ ~
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'9 l s' m8 I& s3 B
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.) y4 T0 Y( C C# e; A: H
h0 x# Q0 Z" K% n4 E13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
5 t+ c8 O0 F) f Clined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
5 N2 @; e" d |7 J7 sblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
