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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:6 Z, Y0 w# y ^2 p8 g& |
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.) ?6 ^) o( c7 r( q5 O+ I
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush& ^0 k. H1 Z* D2 L/ Q" X* B
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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" r0 [$ I7 l3 X& X H6 \) u {; a3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,5 n& m G8 \7 O) D* w
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
1 F( @+ R1 e# llanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4 }3 ]: u# k! @3 A8 Z+ R4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its' `' m! z" w& H6 A) c6 M1 ?
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
% m( s4 Y* d1 l' G1 Nmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires: ]. a( U/ Z, D2 P
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell( D; T* R+ z6 [3 t4 o
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,* t0 x# a6 e. { ?
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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9 `3 j) F0 h1 V( y; `( m6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
6 I: z/ Y+ ]! H0 ]0 }get you shot., \/ W) ~. \. z" X9 Y4 {
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
" l9 O6 ~4 d2 mhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at! E' l7 \* j2 y" X
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
( K7 g9 r7 w! Iyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
~- J. n! k$ H7 x0 v* Evehicle through the intersection.: N: r6 y+ k* s
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour. i4 I0 z! ] w4 e# F% c
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next) n3 {5 S& d8 J
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
) Z6 W" p* o, K6 B; A! E; jmore construction starts everyday.
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: G1 l1 y( Z4 R. Y' g) c9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,* Y! t- g E4 {$ s* k) x- s0 k
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,2 W3 _' \( s. X8 [
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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+ q1 y9 G0 t+ J' }$ O10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
" }+ j* L* j& d9 H( k1 |9 U* Zroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
9 D5 G: Z6 c& W+ R E6 `0 n: h$ kRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
* f9 T Q; S& u, M" e66 Street are also the same road; got it?& [6 }0 s. s3 p3 @1 D8 S. D5 v0 D6 f
/ v- s, n' g6 ?( \1 x% s$ [11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
' L; ?! d" M& w8 V* _. a, dshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally8 p9 E! j; H4 c% d2 h2 l# i
Activated.'
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/ k" F! {$ i4 D9 w! w+ S( x* }12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
: v. u& v$ C, ~( [# x/ [) [you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'1 }" J4 S& p0 ?* W. i( A' k
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
" a1 q( _3 d) O8 {( | o0 w, U( Xlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and; j' p) k. [* F# Y
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
