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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.: c8 \& _2 e7 p1 ~7 q/ j( N7 y6 z
' r: H* y1 F. W& V: k$ I2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
7 M0 t G9 B& r- @* ]0 w6 v. \* bhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
! A& o3 q7 s6 d2 k+ xmorning.( _2 L, v: C( S$ H
( g$ C' z7 n+ [/ ~3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
6 ^% Z5 c+ Y' z$ W3 Nyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a n% p# `# t+ t7 N8 ]/ Q$ s% z
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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1 f: G) t# _7 f4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
& }+ r q) l; c/ ?own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest% H j: r) s; x4 x
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires) E8 V% L0 v# ]
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell# U! {: d4 c# `4 Z
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
: ~& j+ _9 v! m7 B1 a) d0 D0 Bcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
* y1 X# c V1 z& F) i/ D! N0 Dget you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
* \" m9 I1 S z& f; H/ j; Khas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
, x! g% K Z7 g8 _! b, @the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
9 g$ n, t3 W p4 d8 gyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
. ~5 T! s% c% w z, r( U/ qvehicle through the intersection.# X. {! h4 \( r- a% p& l% X
* g; U) M! ^ z" L; }7 r' V8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour3 { n. K8 g# D5 Q' l' R& \
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
V9 o' N6 S7 |0 N/ Aday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and, g8 Z# l1 I) \6 ^7 E! q( Y" I
more construction starts everyday." B a* `6 N# d1 B- z
2 h. i) T. T" M: ]& g# t2 I9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,) j: g6 K' `4 m! |9 [( j
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
5 p9 M* W2 e ~. V8 a% Usquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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: f. ^3 ^* x R' I2 s5 Q10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
- D B: ]& t9 J# Qroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye8 V; X, h7 u1 J
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and$ U8 w8 F6 H9 o# t4 v2 q# q; y
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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) W1 V. {$ C2 N" d; E9 e& u11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
3 Q" T( {4 Z2 M: i8 V) \2 s$ C' ushoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally$ R: I2 T0 O% M+ b8 t, k7 J! J
Activated.'
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) ]7 m9 P* M/ m; i12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,9 H. \# ]5 k; @) y4 Q
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
% S A1 ~. u1 A K2 L/ `accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur: N4 r, h: I! f# t( r
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
3 P( b+ r/ } n7 l0 C! T& t0 K4 g2 |blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
