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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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; {: k9 m+ `% c+ s/ N7 t \2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush3 _: B! Y3 P( a" F- {1 `
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
& x0 ^- T! g0 j5 M: u- m3 byou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
+ u+ r6 M, y U$ k9 _$ slanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
9 Q! @' _7 G* T3 p7 w) w6 Jown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest5 g1 |+ m' |( i) j8 c. t) h5 V2 W
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
" v/ x* ~5 p, o$ y5 ugo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell* ?3 G' G) s, ? b3 q! w
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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- H; N+ R3 t% d5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
5 Y# j% R- P. E6 G/ |0 Ncussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can8 {, C9 s; j3 P& a( Q( J. A
get you shot." K% q$ x: ]6 j9 Y: J* m) B
, r Z9 g* y" e1 M/ e7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
4 `& Y2 _9 z! C, X6 Chas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
4 U, e) a" p' v4 ?3 f0 y! bthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot% y5 a- Y7 q ], Y" t
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
- t, I1 b8 P2 l6 n3 d% Yvehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
1 Q- j t. K: b, w1 S! l# c+ qbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next. e" u2 {+ T3 X" q1 i
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and; w1 S1 x0 `6 H- @5 V. k |, {. ~* h
more construction starts everyday., ~3 t/ v4 r) a7 G
3 t3 {, Y W' Z+ G0 _* B9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
( d8 b8 A$ e% _$ w& b& adeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
6 b; X/ {' \; N; B7 w# rsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.5 H9 B( A- p6 R( _
( F# J# F$ X H# `7 B10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
& U6 v5 K% s& {4 a5 L6 Q9 qroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye m0 O; H' e7 z- b7 {& @, l% q1 A( u
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and0 ^ u8 X* D5 ^4 i% w! H
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the5 k/ j2 v2 r2 Q) E" X5 z g& R3 O
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally: g' @9 g! W4 P- H; @
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,$ w6 X) c3 m5 k* t, c
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'0 Q. _( t- S6 J
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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, \* z- x4 `5 M7 O3 w) c0 n4 [13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur6 G7 G+ X$ F+ m
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and4 c7 B, k! Z; Y3 |( O
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
