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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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4 F( T7 D7 g& P; w+ _/ [1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.2 l) }7 ~$ N/ O% o M
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
b; y; t. v# v+ ^, |/ Nhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday! T4 d+ O3 Q5 z9 F/ o; G* P4 Q4 }
morning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
" |+ p, O! u4 K% ]* y! Wyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a" E; ~6 h# ^! {2 c0 c3 ~8 m
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.) M; P& e2 [" |
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
- U! G% R2 x& Q3 W/ cown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
5 t ~4 U/ v9 y8 o% C4 w, e) imuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
. s) K0 t2 v- g/ Fgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell& r) ?3 ?- j4 a2 g$ |+ y' r& ~2 v
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way. R6 T, l* w: t4 l+ L
2 N& S! r( E0 K- p& s0 Z7 j5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,- q3 w1 S( ?4 _2 A
cussed out, and possibly shot./ a! V; T$ p. X3 U! ?( R$ M( X8 S, Q
. Q- W# k: ~, z- D& P9 N; _6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
* Q4 E5 r: O2 C2 X. cget you shot.
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; Y* C# o3 x$ t/ x* _* }. s0 z7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that' _8 C' y! @: O6 |- f' R
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at$ V0 @$ ?8 k- U
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
8 L4 q; \9 \! f: iyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
0 R o, ] N% h! Z: T# Gvehicle through the intersection.2 Y, z; j3 \5 q7 M5 m* _" ^4 g" o: G
8 ]8 w8 h: _) ?) e8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour4 w4 N6 N) ~% K! l+ y2 Z
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next2 M5 U0 H+ L% _3 N2 d
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
3 T7 M0 d# Q" V$ @; L' `more construction starts everyday.
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% K8 g/ W# L1 s; z9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,' E7 v; u1 U6 P; ?2 t
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
/ {: @' \9 d6 `5 Jsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
( ]7 C% x$ {9 i; E4 \8 f- _8 Droad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye# Y) p9 |2 p: ~( v
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and/ K4 {+ j$ `& z3 z1 a* z+ }1 v
66 Street are also the same road; got it?" C9 v4 n5 P9 q4 d* n4 u
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
/ r8 O: r! ^7 h: @$ Pshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally' D2 E4 F$ D4 U( ~% N
Activated.'! A% H' T% y2 I9 {: b" G8 Y5 q
4 J* L3 o3 B0 V* {* M4 E: W2 E12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,: w6 Y' y, d( A- J
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
5 r v* n; ^! yaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.( t1 ?1 u8 W1 l0 h
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur2 J @( j( q6 ?! a2 ^
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
! O: t3 p0 U# i2 A% E) c! q% lblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
