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ZT: Important New Rules for Driving in Edmonton

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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:) j, x) g% ~5 ^" {6 S; d/ `
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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( t* s8 c3 _/ G2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush4 L" ?3 @, o  A7 P# I
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday* l+ x1 d9 \( \( f+ o0 y* ]* L2 v
morning." O5 T. l  U  Q6 Z3 J
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
' y2 V- _  d& I6 m/ f& z9 h* tyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a6 |3 d* U8 x  r5 D1 I3 l
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its, ]. E" X# u4 [9 X- d$ ]
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
# M, B0 A, }& rmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
' F0 i* a  n1 l# v. W# n& ugo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
7 n# F( `3 I2 `2 uphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.$ }& S7 B3 {$ _7 D/ f8 N, y+ q

% A5 C4 _/ O! ]( N5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
: I4 u% h% U: X1 M9 ^6 Lcussed out, and possibly shot.+ D8 G1 k1 C6 f: D8 K& \
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
2 K$ a1 i/ ~( L+ G" W$ \4 d0 X1 Pget you shot.
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8 j9 d% R: L% l( d* {! P7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that4 y* q3 e! f1 d
has  turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
# ~- g2 |, o" a4 ~7 ^0 R7 Z' Vthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
/ L" E4 \1 y; q+ b  nyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first3 t/ [1 l2 n  ~3 `& L  k) i
vehicle through the intersection.# U' K; J. U" h7 {8 z5 A. c0 b

* F- u' E( C# r. J: V8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
& ~6 \; x& e: M$ _barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next+ z4 z, L0 n( J
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and  Z0 ~- A3 P1 e) k  N
more construction starts everyday.4 v+ W  |) T/ E8 D

" M+ u' Y7 C1 s2 v9 a! ^9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
5 K' P: P4 `) \) xdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
. R- |5 I( Y! x+ `squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
, T& t% n) q7 _& ?8 yroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
! t. {; L9 |/ m& M) }9 oRoad  are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
" x" K, _2 J5 h' p2 N6 Y: Q* l# s66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
" T* o1 [# c% v7 cshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
5 F- a6 {* L& MActivated.'5 b/ D6 j; y* d& W% H! Y$ _  K
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,$ Q0 n( w, }5 p# Q
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'/ R0 j( v  y+ a' e5 Q) U
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.1 m( O# S6 _. Y; W5 {9 t

$ B; u7 Q- r: S3 R. ?13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
, [7 J8 q! p2 O" J4 G, R, glined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
# g* q  B% V7 w; H3 c3 F5 gblankets in the vehicle.
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2010-2-16 22:29 | 显示全部楼层
Funny but true in Edmonton. Where did you get this stuff?
鲜花(48) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2010-2-16 22:55 | 显示全部楼层
靠,还真对
鲜花(9) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2010-2-17 11:24 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
刚以为真的呢,乐了半天“The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph”0 h- I: D7 R1 \7 A! T! Z

) _" N$ c7 J' J0 ?6 G0 Y, A后来发现是搞笑
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发表于 2010-2-17 14:26 | 显示全部楼层
真是那么回事儿.我在左转的时候,经常被后车按喇叭.黄灯的时候,有直行车开过来,我怎么知道他停不停?一般我都等直行车停了,再走,所以经常被按喇叭.原来还生气,后来都耐受了,随便按吧.
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发表于 2010-2-17 16:36 | 显示全部楼层
5# irish
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it happens a lot
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2010-2-20 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
以前我在edmonton的时候也这么想,可是搬到ontario以后才发现爱城的只能算小儿科。
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发表于 2010-2-21 15:03 | 显示全部楼层
厚脸皮,厚脸皮。
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