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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:* P0 O2 [9 X4 _% o& B: U
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
9 N7 q' \7 U0 q( Q# bhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday* G; e1 x7 _2 B, L5 y p
morning.
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+ j0 U0 p% B/ G3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,) h( W# z# h7 u: t$ |* e
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
( I! I8 o6 ?1 ^) N5 qlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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# [9 D. I2 u3 |' @8 u0 c1 S4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its5 ?. t$ C8 Z* Y/ t W' J% F
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
3 {4 ^- f. l5 E) P0 Hmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
# K' J. N) m! n% Vgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell- w& B2 W3 v9 G; U$ d
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,8 D7 f3 u: y6 h C8 P
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
0 `2 ~- f7 R2 P9 `. oget you shot.* m n% e( z/ J; k3 u
3 \* ?0 O' Z! N! T0 e1 `7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that4 L* X0 W: N- [1 x
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
! M$ @3 f' t/ ?" t5 S1 xthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
5 [: f3 W7 m. l1 [$ p7 p5 yyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
* S/ q* E2 [* r5 |, p' k# svehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour; W& O- C u& q+ F! r% H
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
0 L1 W* S, f+ O/ m' Wday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and) W9 z& P3 p0 Z9 e
more construction starts everyday.
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5 z [' w/ ~6 w* u' o2 [0 L+ h2 V9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
0 h% R; p% z* @/ w3 Ddeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
- p) z3 g, q; H9 b$ J% wsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
5 K( J& F+ i2 s. Xroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
+ u3 x$ u7 n0 D) p- Q! i7 g7 IRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and- x- r/ d, a' ]' ^% y8 V4 E0 d$ {
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the: k0 C( f- Q* e
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
! W. B2 {2 ^) X. D+ x6 aActivated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
9 Q% f: K" I0 Y1 V9 ^you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
4 ~( I ]( K, u8 Gaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot., w/ o$ p+ D' g1 X! M" \ ^
" D9 w0 W: J# v+ b13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur6 c4 q( t$ [* h/ R+ F ]: c: ?; H$ m& [
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and! F# e. T7 E* s' p* v5 J
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
