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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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# j& @& I/ u3 F1 |, v% H2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush+ }6 Z, p, O* y" e1 s0 m0 P
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday0 C" X# A" ?9 `' v
morning.
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& f7 R0 l# u; T3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
_- X& z1 \; r! ~: ^' {5 Z. G% Wyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a4 k: R8 j" Q( T1 J
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.' [9 g2 @% H4 J8 y" _
7 P' K# I0 z* R. ?! S, U4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its% ^6 j/ W+ ^. a& _5 x
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
, x, e0 x0 l: k8 |6 O! m/ \muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires5 ^2 k; ~- M" S! o* E$ r3 N
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell' P1 V- \' T/ t8 _
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.; w; A- g! h+ I7 H' v: q! K1 P
3 ~: h- F" w7 F4 a' Q. T( O5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,+ q7 k/ }! v7 _, |
cussed out, and possibly shot. m" r" n/ v; o" N
+ T7 n4 ]7 x- c9 h3 T6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can$ c: m9 J! _% Y: |, L
get you shot.( c& [! Y7 }8 f# z) O4 j
/ u* h) w; U' L% T7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that3 k j; Y! R+ J" J$ A! J% {$ S
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
! i/ q" L$ K) z3 C3 z2 kthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
3 k+ m& u# ]6 Q: a( g+ E; }' D2 H+ c Dyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first, ?8 Q& j6 z% I% q: H0 z8 L
vehicle through the intersection./ `9 p5 ~! [% L9 F! j7 r8 b
0 B! U; E3 e( Y2 Y& j8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour2 [; k4 ^) J' g7 l T6 t
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next4 h9 ]- p( |: @ F3 C& Y
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and6 z+ u' ~5 ~; T4 d
more construction starts everyday.% k/ `; m) n/ h- g' W6 H- e
3 Y. o1 z7 {! V& g& C1 A9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
7 _( r% [) A# {' udeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
7 k3 [- x3 s: `4 i# W/ \squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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6 O9 W$ t5 k6 m/ E4 `% Q$ A10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same% t6 S( q8 D0 q
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
- U& a& U. {. |& URoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and( A+ P* t' R" C0 S- U: m
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
, A) N/ m6 u' T2 [2 Pshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally% @3 N! a+ X- _; z! s
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,6 R) S6 H: Y- D2 f/ E
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
4 _& E3 N3 ?8 o/ {) a' {3 [% haccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot. v) L. w* ?4 f9 m/ o; w
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur3 n' P# [4 o; G" K" H$ O
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
' q) k) h' K' @2 r4 l9 l5 x) ~2 iblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
