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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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% q# q! p4 ^+ J# b1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.9 a$ _# X% H# \- a( y+ N
8 E/ }1 `. H; X5 C, u2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush* ^# G2 q, K0 S. b
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday1 ]9 }1 S5 v8 y) n% \
morning.2 z0 f) t, T; x+ Z! Y
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
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landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.: K j8 X6 j: A7 |
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its4 n# q# Q9 v7 s( I, x3 H
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest7 T6 [# N4 _: d$ Q4 c6 \: L; D$ L
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires! m( o) @6 c" s% B& y" z
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
, a1 H' a% g4 C2 Aphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,% R2 z, O8 P8 [+ w
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
1 q+ q! w. [4 [+ i9 `get you shot.) a. A% j- ~+ f- c: t
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
|. n% r. m' d% @has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at7 |' R2 {; y" c6 z6 ]4 o4 {
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot! Q7 J4 q$ V @
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first+ U4 ~4 K, K/ x% ?! k. \
vehicle through the intersection.8 F7 O1 G7 j! ?7 m" K4 k& E- o
: I! Y0 k; v. c6 \ D& e8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour! b2 L {# t# p& @
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
0 q5 I5 s3 y5 oday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and% V6 ^9 {0 y, k- g# v2 f
more construction starts everyday.4 Y) d5 _' {$ V" R5 w
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,7 O" L X6 ?' p8 i
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,2 J+ f2 I# q( u* E$ H, J
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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5 u/ H" l3 @: U. d10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same2 X$ i; O% Y, a6 J9 }0 u I3 @- I
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye% m4 D3 z& Z6 a
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
+ L+ f3 }* l) Q0 \1 W66 Street are also the same road; got it?/ o9 h$ _3 a3 r/ |3 X' R, {
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the) h' }6 C. v( U% s
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally# m! W2 _9 C" ?7 y# A6 i% @
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
" ^9 a" Z8 y- ^# |/ j3 @you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
" J; |1 e4 e/ |# N* J z$ paccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur/ Q: P, O- t) H, b4 \6 n z
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and6 b1 j$ p) O7 O) R
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
