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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
& U3 B9 X0 a; z$ i9 M5 {( ]0 o/ hhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
. r) \' h+ q6 q7 u- i# `morning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
, U, L a+ ~2 R$ w$ Q, P% Dyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
- I" |, l/ N/ N: B# flanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
3 p5 G1 a5 v* _7 Q, z6 P S# Pown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
) ~8 X& }; z* W# _muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires. h$ T, I( N. N8 t7 U1 c
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
+ Y0 X2 [- V8 ^( e3 qphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,1 X# S# \' l1 }2 d: I
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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; O0 y- r' {& B9 W5 Y& p6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
! C4 T& V' m+ i" O6 `1 {get you shot.
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5 V2 N8 o _/ \' v- ]7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that& W: `4 m% V0 j1 }1 h
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at: |5 j# _$ z0 n
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot! B- B- e8 @/ k9 j* g
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
2 D: e! |' F+ M+ yvehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
R N6 z( E2 g4 Ibarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next M! N5 q: `" o; G
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and- q9 D' V4 D, h( ~* I7 U. c
more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,% t$ }' d: E K, g/ G
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,) r% V4 |7 E2 Z8 ?4 X$ y0 R
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
( A+ B/ e# V1 @0 I. E) t- Rroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
1 z/ Q5 r! g6 {8 b YRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
1 s0 \* u2 W" S. \2 A/ s, ~* t66 Street are also the same road; got it?5 T: q4 p7 w, r- q. x
0 p2 q6 o8 n0 @11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the5 H. T }. ?! S- ?
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally. ~) w4 R- x& ~* e+ x& M
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Z; j# \& x$ \7 X9 }, E$ X12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
+ G e5 V7 M A2 O8 Y+ {( Fyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'8 r( {5 j, K7 k( C3 T$ I0 Q
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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! w! e) V( z0 Z* E! s3 C3 ]. l5 Q13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur# q4 n0 X7 X2 |' }
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and& C3 {0 F; h+ ?+ a8 p0 P! ]
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
