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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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. g1 r% q% Z- f* X3 U0 V! \- c1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush0 _" F1 w9 C! E4 k* u- P
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
Y$ y! c8 |( \( Y+ ?, r+ u" l; y* fmorning.
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, O+ V I$ n5 u& d8 ~. d% l5 I3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,. V2 e) R8 ~) e! K
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
. x! o- X: I; f, u& G$ |1 U3 s; Qlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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B" I! F% q4 ?0 v, ?5 c! b4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
# n0 m. l9 b5 J" N% v' C2 [2 rown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
g! C7 ]& `' A Q+ s+ ~- F2 emuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires' f& H/ \* @. H' ]
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
+ {3 i: U n5 e# v" Z# n0 k7 l& nphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,' B% i3 T9 E7 }+ p) ^$ M
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can! k, [2 L) l% W- O, l- K9 e. i
get you shot.# y3 `+ S, X0 o' f2 }& a/ V1 k
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
5 E2 u5 R& M+ W: n: T: dhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
' ^1 W# Q1 O' N9 {- h: rthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
$ n& W, {( j9 j3 z/ m& \) Fyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
( U$ n2 R" e9 I$ v* B1 L+ ivehicle through the intersection.
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2 |( Q( w# F8 K B3 P8 _9 ~+ n& @9 Y8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
$ t8 e" X% l2 b/ k* y, Mbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
5 \9 b; m$ d" y, ]8 y# ]. Fday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and0 w* d; S1 G2 n
more construction starts everyday. B+ B. [" ]- j& ^
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,9 ?+ A1 }# ]! V+ _$ u
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
- v- H- |8 r& w0 osquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
6 R Y/ c6 x0 q. M B6 N8 I* l9 l" Y ?road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
6 O1 h6 c9 O$ e! Q) i" iRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
0 Z' ~7 G/ W3 a( k: |0 i66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
2 \1 v. c" P+ x! @; M7 W& `shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally3 P+ o* T5 O) R( F5 X* k* q
Activated.'6 P7 t, ^+ m. `1 Z
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
: y0 ]! [# D) Byou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'7 A9 }* O- l; ~9 z% [
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.2 E$ R3 w" O* u, y# E
; I# E' z) X& C& v z3 P1 X K4 q13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur: l' A! p4 W/ E
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
1 \. \( M% q' A4 B( l Eblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
