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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:. U) C9 g2 d! r3 W ]
7 D! G4 T9 |' [ D1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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! s/ P; q4 n2 H2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush0 X6 x% C9 f2 m
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday5 Y7 @: y, U& s$ E, A9 E0 j; r
morning.4 \6 A. R- D' J3 R. p; W- a
# U* A3 |. C1 y% O' {0 l3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,& t$ c5 p# O" B0 D
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
0 n. O8 b( I+ W2 J$ |/ Clanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'." b* k3 O% A. S% R
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its" O' Y% O9 m) V
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest- _% i7 t& z/ v6 Y4 z
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
3 i! s" E K7 p5 a$ U R; u; vgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
) V2 h3 P" _: V1 b; N9 C& ]) dphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.- A3 e4 @% v2 H" t" F! c" \, ^1 J
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,; Y( b, D: A* W T4 X' @% t
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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( r* s8 b* R* L6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can% B# \. U$ x4 V$ a3 z: c3 V
get you shot.
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! y! B" J+ X5 h! g, t7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
) D! b3 z+ y+ y( M! Rhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
2 p2 a/ N3 E$ E, V5 sthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot6 `. I/ s, Z* G$ M5 Q0 M2 A
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first% |! j1 n, ^: ^. O: O
vehicle through the intersection.# N+ a" U$ N! N7 k ~* R
/ S. K% Y( j/ F; i8 r8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour4 }+ m( g* K( `" N4 m/ _
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next, L- G8 Q/ P9 f5 w9 I* z
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
& G3 U7 O5 d, Q0 K1 Qmore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,0 I6 C! F- y6 q6 P/ A" e
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
" ]) \: h* a' Gsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.4 u8 I) ?( b1 L& a' ?& \
) W: a: C/ X4 y% v+ F10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
% E' S+ w; g5 r" h) ?* L$ Uroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
0 w8 _: t9 t, gRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
5 ?, S: w. R! h0 K; Y66 Street are also the same road; got it?3 ?$ J/ j8 e* ~% Y @+ ]# ?" s J
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the E5 V& b& S1 P4 R$ o+ s( x
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally# y* T: b/ ~8 k' \, E
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
6 b0 L, R$ P. Myou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
1 s+ p% p8 b3 l8 N/ I- b+ ~7 T! t8 ]accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.* D1 v" s, e+ W* z
3 m: y! [, t- ~" |* V8 E j; X) n) N13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
1 \1 q8 y8 e0 k$ B& y9 a2 B' E& _, olined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and( q$ @1 T# Y/ W. J
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
