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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:( n" v0 F0 v# Y5 w T& C4 ~
7 u4 K! w- J9 M0 P5 R Q; N1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.; S- @+ H. l' p0 O
% p4 N( u: A- Q2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush, D7 H8 I' `5 Q# H& e( z, o
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
* q4 Q' X% Q* i. f& Hmorning.
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8 r4 d1 g) F: H4 x. |9 K a3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
. t4 I: C5 E$ i5 F# pyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
5 v$ o- T( L* ?7 V8 mlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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9 Q: r& P6 \; a( K8 |4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its+ B8 ~) f0 G2 K, l9 a
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest5 h4 `6 L6 Z% V) X) `8 p
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
. |0 t' M" t( J" mgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell$ f, h# M: ~% F, ^
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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$ `, t! t# P& p/ |4 ?5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
" W* V* k( m) K# l; w0 D1 Mcussed out, and possibly shot.3 k( [) u/ {' e
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
* g) w1 m2 B0 ]' W$ Z" Y4 Sget you shot.
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) y( U) w5 g" O! Y3 a1 s0 D7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
$ i' W; }2 l2 N$ s/ |) whas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
# T9 V) O: C- P1 Jthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
- J$ a5 o% T `, Nyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first$ }6 _! ?; I9 Q! w( W3 L
vehicle through the intersection.& q( h% ^' q" B; a! {8 R
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour- P; z' j2 P& u- m0 o, z" p
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next" P; s) b% \! j$ i
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and' M9 l E( \5 m0 o3 Q
more construction starts everyday.8 i& z9 x0 B9 J" e9 {) N
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
3 P. D5 {* o0 G8 E, l3 odeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,9 I, E* c: I# a& j& L9 F
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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% ]1 a- o- I* F10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same Q2 S9 F V- X5 V8 p' Q' \1 w
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
8 B6 l1 a# J9 \1 W! d! _Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
( f% Y8 R$ T6 r# G66 Street are also the same road; got it?0 P+ E; G4 O0 f4 @2 ~2 W
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
- M+ Z0 ^, F: K. k) B3 h+ t5 L" yshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
5 N, y* o( `" FActivated.'6 s" G0 m$ X% l3 l& M- g) P9 h# d
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
0 U9 n B1 R- C" z1 iyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'; {7 o. j- k7 Y2 |% [4 b/ {
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot./ D" q n4 f# M0 g6 V' Z% s
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur+ d" [5 r H8 G3 ?6 }1 H
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
! f3 [% ?* z( Z$ f2 _blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
