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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:8 T) A. T5 `# Y- }! b% Q
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.2 P8 o5 W: S r+ ]6 p
" S/ n7 P) A C$ F" E( v2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush! J; {6 }1 N* T; Y! p
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
8 D% v: ^5 W, M( ]morning.6 l2 p/ f' j- C6 T: }. Q5 Z8 f
2 g& r! q7 v- U1 j' {* E3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,2 s, `6 J# x3 h# n8 W7 u# W
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
- I& ~. T: m* K1 `0 |landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
9 x E7 M n$ k5 gown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
& ?: C& y% j! {+ \muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires' W& `+ \9 p0 h8 U
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell! N: B! e- v+ m+ F Q; [
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.1 A) D2 E3 v9 r5 n0 g; l* J
+ I7 b3 p: P5 K. _5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, F' J5 u& R) p
cussed out, and possibly shot.1 u, }7 X, W8 p3 j% w
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
0 K$ q" ?; _, L: } Gget you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that: U, y( `8 S0 B/ D! M( b% \1 X. \
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at. z8 H7 {3 o1 O# b
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot/ k* ~) @" @1 f4 m4 t2 Z4 T
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
, Y" @- P C6 e' s8 _# I. Yvehicle through the intersection.
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y0 K _% x$ v6 Z8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
% L7 c8 @! o+ X. ibarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
7 G. h. v# ]8 B* }/ N* gday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
0 R5 Q: F, ?+ `5 y4 z# _* x- ?more construction starts everyday.8 M- k. u0 C, e. y0 K) x4 |6 p' v
8 [9 V1 d0 O: `+ ?0 ^+ u9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
% c" s: B7 ?3 j1 n( Fdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
3 U/ V; e& i8 I0 p& u& e6 Y0 r/ Psquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same; M' q# V# n( \* q
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
4 z+ ]5 I `5 l7 F4 eRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
8 S0 E7 O( @$ n* g! j0 V2 x66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the3 ~1 S" o: x, W3 v
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally2 r5 e$ _' K; g$ J" _
Activated.'3 a( |* O7 J" S) h' l8 N+ I' w; Z
0 o! F+ _3 B; O4 W5 {12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,5 n8 V) U* g* F0 Y1 |
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
! P+ U" G1 j+ K7 s0 T' @/ O# ~0 Raccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.; j6 J: d3 @" X8 m" N
; `& ~! z, `6 j$ n- _9 N# I13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
/ W H! d+ Y0 d5 a; Zlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
7 M* a6 m# ~! |blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
