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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.' h8 t; C7 b% B, C$ ? I* |/ K* n
. m* ~5 d, H1 u$ n7 d% m2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
; H4 I: [; x+ Qhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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% t. ]$ `1 J4 b3 r3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,* K+ v4 L: @9 ]: p# \
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
. ?$ y$ }& ^4 _& dlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'./ n9 H, I" F; z' }2 V& y6 x- e
* S5 j1 |% r3 Z& E4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its& _% v$ o/ B5 G3 t
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest% N: G1 |" M# k) q
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
+ O6 M- C& H) A$ cgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell! x0 z5 |* o: q
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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, d3 P# q+ H, T8 J) l* ^, T( D9 P' C5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
7 p0 ]7 |# g& T( Dcussed out, and possibly shot.
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& i4 F Q) W: c8 k: h6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
& c- L* J ]% bget you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
$ b4 K% ]7 `8 |. F H4 e% X1 V# B3 nhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at1 I. [ J+ }8 E, c4 Q; l3 _, Y/ e# r
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
7 }' I/ W2 r$ l5 A) u* lyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
9 X8 g: S# q. J! Y+ U" [8 l$ yvehicle through the intersection.
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# ^( e! v2 T" ~8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour1 N4 N9 t! h0 l8 v9 ^* `
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next: d, B/ b: S* s4 \) @) q0 x
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and7 R# G, F: _% ?% _/ A s
more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,8 `3 D, H1 F }- I2 N# p6 f6 s
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
3 _# K# P. M, M& asquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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6 N. Z9 f* [: b7 w" U10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same/ r4 @. \6 ^1 t
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye/ ?( R: \$ f }$ r
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
- d: q& G7 s: `2 ~1 G4 ~9 a4 E5 r9 k66 Street are also the same road; got it?2 }+ m$ q0 u1 h7 e
# N; r; V& G$ d- R0 g4 O8 ]8 S11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
2 d4 u; d# g- nshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally" m/ o% R! z4 f6 |
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
' Z. l; E* U: Zyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'8 R' k! K5 B! D& E0 H1 s% {
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.6 ~* i) F R4 {- Z
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
4 e4 S5 m8 t4 e/ _0 C: J* V$ ]7 o. mlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and1 {1 B) _6 i- J# T2 L
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
