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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:% Z( w# r; h1 c( j8 [3 {
; @6 U: G: w8 }" l3 R: q1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.- `! i- ~% P9 V+ Q: L3 Z1 p
7 T) A4 R3 C0 W+ ~" [& H9 \) B; p2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
( s/ n; l0 C9 Y; V R1 Mhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
) I; Z7 R) [0 o! s4 ~& p Pmorning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,. B, S8 x; w: \: H8 @
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a* K) D V$ g* i1 f: ~ Z; y
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its K6 Y+ a% @" b- ?
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest' f' N8 w2 _" f( ]3 g! I7 @7 c# t
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
2 n4 c: k- E- lgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell0 `9 b# ^4 a( J( r3 Z
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way." K% v8 A. t- t# [; x# l
) p/ p: q# m- `, j/ R2 L6 r9 j5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,+ Y" {+ e# q. b9 z! g1 T Z
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
+ o: E! M3 O" _7 Oget you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that/ @8 r/ W" L9 g3 I7 S w; J A
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at" f6 P+ A2 v6 p+ x. U$ d
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot b9 i/ P2 X: g% P
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first4 y/ e8 h8 A- \- [ p# I' I
vehicle through the intersection.0 s3 L* q+ |( @$ a9 T% D! A
' |- [, j- f! i& R8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
+ ~7 w. k; F, @: `+ qbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
8 ]" _, W7 |: Z% x" X# C5 l( Tday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and+ q5 g7 ~) U: J+ e: ~
more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,& \! ]4 U2 h0 ^0 o+ m' }* {0 t) m
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
G9 x( z& k8 k8 F1 a* z( G* ?squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.$ m3 t- d4 L& B# }" |
( }: L) k. i3 g2 [4 ?10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same2 Y0 |$ }6 s5 j; S
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
# [+ x9 D6 D( r7 f6 hRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
/ c5 @6 \+ \% P' e, M3 F' F* a66 Street are also the same road; got it?# R8 W" H: \5 B6 N- y* A: H
& D4 u% P2 r3 k8 `11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
* H8 z! i( M) {/ nshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
5 `+ O( B: _$ b2 K* Y# g" ?Activated.'# u( G& ~; f1 t/ ]# S d+ o3 ]
% ~$ S2 c6 q% g2 e12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,3 R9 A: p$ W/ H9 K2 n
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
; P# C# s R3 q7 V% Paccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
8 P) o- H; R# Y( v# {# x' Clined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
, d6 Y+ _' I7 Q$ ~blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
