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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:7 j9 V7 X: V& b2 u
. S- j9 k/ C, j: L1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.8 s3 {/ T% Q* b1 M2 s" N
3 d/ X# T G8 Z. H4 K2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
. n4 j9 [6 G- m. n+ C! v2 Ihour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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; }8 f f$ ?( k. d% ^8 }3 i4 I3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2," H" O7 z4 [+ i' [5 |* Y- p2 Y
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a, \3 o" J/ J) O
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
7 L7 R# d' Y, S! S0 r% qown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
7 x1 B. `1 m1 h( b7 ~; \muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
% c$ t* o0 r8 ~/ G. hgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell5 N1 x, f1 k3 Q" ^" ]
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
5 N! C7 @, w5 k0 K1 U8 R7 d2 ]- Mcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
" U5 X8 Z2 w- v2 m! @3 xget you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
( e* c8 N4 p& j- Xhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at1 y0 Y8 t: o) `" e9 I1 V: W3 R, S3 Q
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot9 m9 w7 B" B7 y9 j$ F
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first6 r: ?, i+ B2 p& A/ V
vehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour5 r5 O0 z% t/ D9 L2 g" x6 a
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
$ T. z# W% X; [day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and+ M6 b @! u2 ]7 e% R$ Q& C. f) M
more construction starts everyday.
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" s. N, o" D* }6 Y v- Y9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
4 O' c% h6 P: N% c. O, {deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
, q7 U1 x [, h* ^7 Osquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.9 o1 l% |: f$ T0 ]2 U3 F; @# ^5 l
" I! g$ v- ^6 E# i/ I& |, t) Y; ^1 u10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
6 V) c2 a0 X" t9 f% ?road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
* E5 ?; M \% U% ?. sRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
- e$ U8 `$ [4 C; Z% O0 J! _8 @" l66 Street are also the same road; got it?# G. q. D% N& N' I9 {1 A0 F2 L
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the0 W% ]% \& B* y% Y3 S4 {6 }
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally1 T- J3 I; |- |- G2 N' G7 f0 c6 p
Activated.': I4 L# K) Z; J) v2 N7 }1 a
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,0 f9 ~& h& y. x) L9 i( h% N
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
3 h9 G1 B& r. Y8 f1 Y( u. o- G4 [: u' [accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
6 K1 L* M+ C! N3 F! D( Slined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
8 I+ n# N8 ]8 N3 U! }blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
