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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.8 h# ]) n' S7 |/ a! M, R; k1 p( i
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
% S- d9 I7 a4 w% ]" K4 ghour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday5 g, }8 N5 Y+ H" H+ v6 r
morning.
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6 L- v, b8 d% w* |; M3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,, s x8 R- P! I+ Q
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a1 [0 v/ `! j& a3 C! [1 L! D
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.' b& M6 ]4 S0 l- t! ]
/ P5 q& F2 q" B- t+ ^& [4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its5 _. r4 M3 w7 a7 y/ z4 X: K
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
8 s" T) @" K8 G- {muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
. i& [3 b" \8 N& [1 W2 `, Rgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell3 o: k% z% `: l0 W8 P2 R& M
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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* m! E; P. ^2 \" a8 r) J; f5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,- \( h5 [+ H T) t* ^5 _
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can P) L9 z) ~5 |% v
get you shot.: l; r0 J9 O& ^; I; {1 ]
0 q/ q; v; A% u& Q( p7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that/ }% g4 m1 r* b0 }
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
+ g0 f4 @8 V9 m7 V8 @the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
0 S) F+ n( P9 Tyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
: \0 \2 |) ^' lvehicle through the intersection.
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# d. u/ [, C* e: j1 H7 ]8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour( v& `0 \6 @8 ~
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next- x3 l9 y' g7 e8 ?" R5 i
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
$ Y' o' Z0 F1 R# o+ Zmore construction starts everyday.$ W( ^! ~2 G! a
7 ?4 v3 k0 z, o8 R& O) v; ?) y9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
6 O* G% V {; G$ C, rdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
8 L4 G0 z; f) n5 p2 F* T* zsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.5 G/ J) K0 E3 x) y ^0 x
Q. }' y% \& j
10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
+ I) ~4 G* E' B$ q4 _, zroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye+ d8 y. F" G! n& L" M
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and1 U6 U0 p' _& m6 B i
66 Street are also the same road; got it?4 e# G9 Y+ ?( K6 q* C0 V7 [
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
; L: a8 x5 ]& z. }. X) }) t# Nshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
8 Z+ a' K( h2 Z# b6 l' k7 x/ PActivated.'. C5 I% s# u: F
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
% d, s6 ~! l1 r; j/ G' e$ L2 p% oyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
1 D, I r8 h$ eaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
& a: W' R! X# Q. g |2 llined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and2 ^6 \+ B, |1 }4 H8 f9 B. k
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
