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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:; @2 J5 _3 p! j& u$ r3 @. L: ^3 ^" V
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.7 Y- T8 ~+ Q) }4 K( t% O
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush1 x% G0 g3 i2 `8 g4 g
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday5 X; u3 s4 Q9 U2 E
morning.
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4 u% v3 w+ ?) S' t: M3 m3 `3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,1 o5 @0 T% O6 m+ G
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
. q0 a9 {# H# I) v# O& X! e G' llanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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9 U- s8 P+ A+ }! {/ s9 N; I4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
5 ^! a+ }4 Z# W( r7 J; Jown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest/ M" A" K5 g- n2 U3 \4 w
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires2 N- u8 J9 A7 E* c7 q
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell9 y, B4 |8 v2 ~0 N
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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; n2 A+ ]5 S' z7 @5 b7 Y, M5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,4 [! f6 w* o" z% `# ~
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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3 F S9 S* r* O- F" C6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
e* z7 J2 P- `) p- Eget you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
: C: l/ o( a: Xhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
6 S% r) j& D# ^: r; f6 Nthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot) {$ Y$ }( U, s) ]* j
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first. A8 n6 f' u. i6 B5 z, m
vehicle through the intersection.2 m0 U N( g' G. M/ p
, V4 M3 z8 V1 G# s2 C" O8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
6 {: I6 V2 }" |9 t- U+ x; H$ [% _barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next, A# U, B0 N) j9 W D
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
1 V5 |3 g/ G% T; s; O1 r, ^more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,0 w3 i2 ~0 X' Z( r
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,: [, r+ M, f9 `! Z
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same' c, ^, Q, ^& x' [; \* B# V6 s5 I
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
' e$ w2 p+ j7 w. t4 S$ ?Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and% [. ? s9 T% I- O5 G# N6 J. Q
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the6 \1 j1 V) }/ U6 L: o6 J# f! G r
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally1 i7 q8 n7 Y! F, t3 B4 @, I9 H
Activated.'7 J2 j9 U, e* x$ r) h
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,) r- Y: _- C8 C# o- ?8 Q
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off': z0 \, O2 h2 g* t
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur2 Z0 l% \! z# n3 T2 {( h
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and t, H7 R( v4 H3 a+ L
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
