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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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, G; M6 P% t$ C E+ N% `4 Y1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.8 U/ D/ B; l9 v5 u- A( Y9 \
3 l q0 y& @. W9 _2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush. j1 p( C' E, u7 Y3 a
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday3 ~* n% L1 H7 q) W% [% N' r- w
morning.
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! x! \6 s* ?7 A! x ~4 i$ R3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,' q: K$ W/ j1 q- ^" y( ~
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a+ T8 z5 R0 _) K& f# P, b( {
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.. @- P; J) ]% X1 T2 k1 d
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its' \, i$ ~5 ^8 X) @- C' r
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest6 G& \( A' K6 o: r6 y# r, v, Z
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
3 `/ h4 F4 S5 p, T* f5 C& V) X6 Ego second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
6 A6 b' c4 d5 J* Q1 C; ~. x0 Uphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,/ n' m! ?- c) @+ _) Q! v8 _6 @
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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1 D, I, m7 |. _7 t6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can) d- |+ @! L% I
get you shot.! w7 t/ W% H8 ?7 g
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that6 b* P* W: [: Q! M
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
& Z2 D' ?- d, Othe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot. T* W9 V* o! y7 {; {) j8 U
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first( x0 H' R p; T& H
vehicle through the intersection.
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: ^. W. |" z5 H( Y8 D8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
8 \' r( X# E& j3 ibarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
" [( F, t. _" }- \+ Xday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
, D0 J4 U' J. r) s2 ymore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
* v; P% L" I) \ Odeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
2 E' n3 ^: l; K! |squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
) {$ F E. O" l$ Uroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye& c# Z3 g% x7 ]" E
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
$ V% M! J/ h' V: u) l8 r3 l* V66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the4 H+ u! q. d) ^
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally# [# _2 U H% O& c! ?% m5 v
Activated.'
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. ?& ~- b# ~; D12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,$ h" n# a4 V! L) R, c
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'$ [9 g. l4 S% y7 J* z4 k
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.+ s. Y. P% T: E. F' k
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
2 C1 @- M6 }8 m3 T5 ~' v" e0 e$ t& Plined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and2 z$ _( _: F" Z, S% x+ W$ F* S
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
