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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:3 Z+ z0 W. B0 T% ~: I
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
/ t: l7 M1 W+ Y, H. Mhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday, b7 @& _3 _4 I. w) l/ t; _5 ~
morning.6 o( j( D; A F: ^% O6 S
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
- s' [2 B, o2 I( |' \& Eyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a* ^9 [5 c% t" i/ M0 @$ K4 J, v
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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: n* g7 L% B8 J4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its- a$ k8 i" N1 o+ ]6 M
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest" r! U! T6 i- N
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
8 z. w8 O! O" P9 V) f. L9 ggo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
& U2 a4 L1 D5 e7 M3 {- `phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.2 r) j0 w% z3 Q. ?+ m
4 H7 s! D0 Q. d1 F0 ?2 W/ `# y5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,& ^( d/ _0 R# g8 d; N/ ] I! ^* L
cussed out, and possibly shot.. n: _8 J: {2 f
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can' s4 p, ^3 ~& N }* U* M
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
+ A; M3 s* u! v+ ?has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at- ~+ r" l3 t% O$ d. H* f+ v
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
2 E1 v0 E- z2 xyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
( ]0 W# I. z# J4 d* _( evehicle through the intersection.) r& o! N. ~" x7 X. p/ m5 D+ j$ ^
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour% e% `5 m/ S8 q& z: P4 b1 t
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next" l) m: c: n. l9 u9 Q
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
4 `7 Z/ e3 _8 @+ o B. vmore construction starts everyday.7 Z; B: G D( m7 Q( {; [$ U: {
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,) w5 d$ l0 |' S+ k. Z& W$ v) w
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
" P8 Y! r5 v' y0 ~4 qsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items." c* _' q# t7 S- e
* ]/ C' \/ P' ^4 R# H10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
" P1 C: {% s) i `* [# iroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
- F$ N, `: o1 ~% U7 `Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
) n3 {4 k) L- z, N5 _66 Street are also the same road; got it?+ U1 ]- u! [ r: S% r
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the* X( e1 a0 p5 `9 y* Z
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally2 [5 O( ]- ]3 h4 t
Activated.'
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' t; ?% ?. V3 {, V: d ^: M0 Q12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
2 Q# ` c' x% ~4 h# ?you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'* _7 M* Y4 }" V! Z) K' s+ m, l; ]
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot., c3 V ~/ I8 q0 L
1 s, u t) E% _$ _13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
) u0 A! d0 s+ |# c8 Klined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and, S5 z! R& [# O' I6 t. z
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
