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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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: A. G" W6 n5 H2 K' ^5 S* d1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.+ _1 F; Q2 `# I
0 J) s' a3 \' ^# q$ x/ I2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
; p7 b! K: m9 [! \hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday' Z8 O7 G" I: Z8 r
morning.
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+ J @& ^ R8 k1 K. o" B$ j3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
( W1 x7 p& j5 j; Y8 J1 X+ ?( myou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
# E5 a$ s. @' k' T- Blanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
/ w2 \1 R3 e! s% n" Vown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
& R n" M8 D* U- Kmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
% L8 i, B' o/ m1 X m# ego second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
+ x3 J0 e3 S9 w% m" q* Uphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.( D/ D8 N5 O" N3 f0 e
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
8 f; ^, D5 }3 T* e+ B; o9 Jcussed out, and possibly shot.: F5 Z' K# G- b4 r
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can1 B* V7 b# x# e {9 J! S
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that' e; a7 c: c( v) B
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at6 @( }( O& D8 \3 Z7 {3 P( _
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
4 Z4 V/ r# X. Q+ J8 |2 J% s6 u( fyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first7 R5 o) X/ ?* ?" \, i* ?" U
vehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour# V _& O; ^0 N$ J6 f
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next- h, x! i4 J6 u9 c6 l. Z
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
4 I8 }7 K* C$ ?* X) ]0 s" Gmore construction starts everyday.) N0 m$ o0 q* d. B
$ Q1 K+ q' O- o9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,; R3 b5 \5 M; e
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,( v% i% W% p' s/ z* Y
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same7 G# m9 z4 c. x' E" B, E9 T
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
6 k2 [# S6 Q* L$ @Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and# O2 A( f4 b( r4 t9 C/ H
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the O3 y! f K5 E4 }' v8 ?# q( g
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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0 W. P O! }8 m' L4 n' `9 A% E12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
6 g4 }. c3 ~* [# _( {7 S1 Ayou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
8 [0 K" M+ ~ g; H V; baccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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4 E# _ S4 y. g3 r# c8 i13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur4 ^ ~ b3 D6 e; B0 ~
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
2 Z/ }' e- V8 ]blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
