 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!$ J6 w3 R: c6 V3 b
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写4 t* C( d; J# m. x4 F$ b
R4 l( e) T/ A9 E" q0 a1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.& A4 z2 K' h& {) j
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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2 x5 O( O; L; G5 x; f1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
9 S! N" {9 m% B# i' F7 V! E6 r# ldown.
2 h# C4 }2 I% W5 R4 ]7 `1 Q% dWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 3 F+ j( v% H" C5 g8 {, F( Q
you
. ~6 |1 Z6 j! D# t/ p6 |5 f4 a8 Zleaving it down.( _$ W$ P- D3 Q: s' E
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides." [" A$ o/ A% {7 p
Let it be.9 d' v) o! F: m' U' Q- N
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去: i( h/ d6 o) O& B, a1 s
5 [ Q* O7 O3 P6 l1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it; B1 n W1 t& Z; b
that way.
/ q) |8 \* N3 l3 _# Z, g1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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5 r0 Q' b: |+ B) T$ G/ C1. Crying is blackmail.: L4 z; g) k: L. x$ N
1，哭泣是敲诈; Y! B- w4 H; |' F
& m k$ O& S5 ~2 @% s, q) k# |8 ]1. Ask for what you want.% ?" r4 y- E9 T2 t
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!3 A) ]1 P+ X% r; h( k" q" j
Strong hints do not work!
/ s9 f( j" C5 S5 W- Q4 k* l* xObvious hints do not work!
# j# d5 ]0 P t! P5 w+ gJust say it!# X5 c2 P" p# o2 V* X, H7 z
1，你想要什么就说
! K3 m' x$ i" B1 e# L6 J我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！$ v. A Z% r* f, U/ e {
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
. n, A+ D$ V1 cquestion.
$ ^! Y9 K/ |# C1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）1 ~+ b3 I6 M, E$ j/ B* ^" p
& s1 ^. ~8 U9 K2 n% K/ S8 s. S0 S" I1 s" w1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
! p5 q* H7 V, s$ Q1 Hwhat we do.
: v* R2 x: f$ ]' K( x: k& k6 qSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
+ B. ^- }& ]: s" D1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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0 P) u7 c5 I H2 r4 w9 _1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.! ?# o8 o" g& @+ h4 ]
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.; C8 [* w8 G' a+ w
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
$ b4 L. g x' J4 A* n1 y我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
* b: c3 z. g6 H4 t s& M. J8 Uto act like soap opera guys.& y' n* W) B2 p1 G. [7 m
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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8 d+ {" C4 b, e5 X' a. e1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
8 ]# f5 R/ I/ C0 t5 e1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们/ K. Y3 C3 g7 _6 H
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways2 q: s( D) d3 C3 L+ s2 n* V
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
3 v3 l% E) g. E5 X4 V, r" W1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。0 u* ^. ?/ m; b" Z! Z& V2 G
4 D% k$ h$ u1 H（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
& I& q6 k$ T& `, [! G# ^1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it0 I8 w% u7 n+ x6 H4 t, d
done. Not both.
2 N. e/ F z/ k5 n' gIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself." z8 K1 Z' K; w# v* A
( p( R9 ^' o* j; K8 y1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during" t! b# }/ h. P
commercials.
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/ c- q A: C7 z3 ?" m1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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+ D7 n1 `9 T8 o( n; O1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
* K: t6 @- v2 x# ]7 q- U0 F1 RPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.8 Z. a" \! s4 P# a- q. E$ m
We have no idea what mauve is.9 `2 c- F0 ~& R
7 O, |' S: h. D. x1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1 }$ b$ F, M) d8 N1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like" s! t1 \. Z2 @
nothing's wrong.
: u' x ^$ I7 H/ a5 ZWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.5 K. ?* B% l, q* ~/ J4 o" r5 y
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
' H+ e% _6 `+ w0 B. d. J5 kyou don't want to hear.2 A& w3 s7 a3 `" X
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
$ ?: V, p0 e2 Y7 A: P; nfine...Really.
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. g/ {! H$ ^ u/ k, g# d2 v1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to7 H% L# r- d3 }& [6 c6 x
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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* B3 Q. t0 R6 l8 o6 n1 E& X* v1 a1. You have enough clothes.
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+ C( j! {# a" e% a/ R2 E# n1. You have too many shoes.1 i* I( A ?: [
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!3 Y0 C% j$ t3 s
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1. Thank you for reading this.' |. L5 b, c# c$ w0 z; v
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;4 u. B. E" H- J! v$ m* I, X
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.4 m* e/ G1 f0 }0 Q7 l3 l# U
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
