 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
|
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!2 O$ O4 G4 j9 P4 h& T! G
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
1 h; X# ?/ u0 J5 H2 y$ R# K' L2 c# a
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.8 p$ f9 m& Q" z
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
2 q9 ~& u/ L8 N
6 ~, e) v" v, V; p1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it, H4 x9 H, G+ ^" W1 R
down.
. W6 p6 `% ?& M" D/ z# iWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
/ D* E6 `. ]. ~+ x; S4 [8 E ayou
" [5 G* a2 m% H! q1 }leaving it down.! z) W7 I8 q; W u J$ W Y
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？ M: C- I0 K' _* @
t; D- j3 x/ W7 S1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.$ _/ _% o a4 o4 C5 u
Let it be.# Q$ T( y3 H* p) b) j
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
# `! S e. \" M: f8 ? [# q3 w$ W( f' C& F
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
' {& K z1 G8 s9 [+ U0 n2 ^% Ithat way.2 Q: z0 X' W( ^4 B+ o+ V
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！8 {+ ], \: i' ]1 P6 G1 f9 q- j
# U$ r5 ]& [ T3 _( c1 s9 Q! M: J1. Crying is blackmail.
( G5 T( P$ D. Y# J6 G; A# d1，哭泣是敲诈
9 i o1 k1 d( q3 p4 l$ s3 `, v8 m& I, t, e, O
1. Ask for what you want.
' G/ G" C$ d6 v/ L8 NLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
1 \! b. m, j& [, BStrong hints do not work!+ s0 P' l# f' s+ a2 W+ S
Obvious hints do not work!5 e% ^$ \7 A& u( @ Q4 ?0 ~
Just say it!' ~) l; ^1 U/ {1 } r2 u# O
1，你想要什么就说
) a5 {- C) d8 S* Q( K我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
# G+ Y. I: n' f. a t' }2 F) W4 u
: f! G- n9 v: q; o- e, S' j% h1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
" F2 u2 T' L5 `; f' ^% wquestion.
! t4 m6 l9 }+ I. \3 X9 k1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）8 a, v7 v! d T0 N/ g
; o% U' E" O# s# {- L( U
1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
5 J5 Q, ~( r6 Zwhat we do.
5 k& J i" w2 ~Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.2 K) a8 t3 p F4 N) X8 {4 b' L5 I
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。) v# @' o: K% E4 n5 Z* S3 m
1 ^- b4 a/ J) P1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.) t. V; O& `8 j8 c1 x
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去" M3 v3 L3 j" @- R+ g( ^; Z2 F
& H6 `# }- v. w2 U0 c; I1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
" s0 X" A9 K0 t7 S2 d4 j% VIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
3 p" K& G6 f. w% W& U* J% U" u; f我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
2 W; B8 n( G* |* W* L+ w) _' r* K$ x
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us# ?1 D+ w# {. X! M- \2 A
to act like soap opera guys.
8 v- A! t6 U E" x* D' x1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们9 e- x) [! q& \$ j) `
9 N- ^+ y4 X' F: e1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
/ w: M4 E7 v& |, u1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
7 j( o( L0 A2 c& j3 C
2 R$ Y/ R- P* u" z1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways0 m% Z V2 n2 u6 t
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
6 _: o( d9 _, J" R, p' y1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。7 t* Z5 x6 h; Q, r7 o7 T
2 P. W/ G4 `& Q- i3 \- N7 e: r! a（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢） F) g7 i$ F; u& q# P5 l& r+ p& C6 m
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it" x8 E9 N) K" V- m' @/ ~- _
done. Not both.
. U. m# r+ f- r# Y0 p" K9 SIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
8 W, J1 d. I/ B. V: ]0 E/ k8 G7 B7 v' U9 L
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
2 I; D: m5 J9 j( s8 i- `* ]9 Ucommercials.. v* _6 b0 l0 i' G2 L
2 p2 ?& Y+ }& \' v1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
' h3 l+ _- B% V" f" w) P+ p; \! t% v/ B2 h) ~6 Q- m
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
4 R& {* i% {+ T, R2 F. @Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.. C; K7 s1 j( G: [+ G0 B
We have no idea what mauve is.1 D5 w# F: [0 [# Q
6 J1 @0 h8 A J# c1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
4 `- z1 f) l. T7 S) c4 ?; e" ]& ]. }" M1 h
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like' T3 B& R7 e( j7 }
nothing's wrong.) z8 Y! o! `7 k( O
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.! W. D3 O! J, a% I
# \& `( c1 k( A+ L' t F K# k' y1 _
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
: c9 E1 y/ N' _ ~# r3 fyou don't want to hear.- I0 a3 u4 E' T: S, l
' i5 n$ V1 z& Z3 k6 l- ]. V1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is4 u. p, D# j3 q6 |
fine...Really.
* ?: j' I y& x6 ^) }6 d ?+ x! V' f4 S* @4 k8 n
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to+ r/ _6 g% H( ?, C. p. t; Y4 Y8 J
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
; q! }' A" B8 p/ y9 r" w6 W; ?, \% K$ k1 O( K
1. You have enough clothes.2 T9 N+ n8 L) c6 {" |( l
5 [/ p7 r8 ?# k7 T5 x" Q$ w
1. You have too many shoes.. f$ ?/ m/ R4 \* p
) j1 J3 h' k: o% [8 N0 d6 W h1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!4 J4 `/ v5 d6 B" g1 G
, n! Q+ F+ Y. o1 w& z1. Thank you for reading this.; K4 @3 i3 q5 _6 v$ m
' X3 a9 s7 ]/ j6 g9 A
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
; H/ U/ M* B; `But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
2 j" w, D0 X+ D; a. I9 a1 Q8 z( N. Z6 Q% P0 f6 v9 l {+ t
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.7 [) H, ?- W8 U% e) m w
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
( D* A4 Y' j) ` h7 G