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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!* N1 D* I, B: |' d4 y
请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
7 B2 P! l% b4 i1 p. R, v1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫4 i3 o) J* h, }6 c8 [

! g7 E# g. T: g" D1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it1 Y+ c- }7 y4 c! u
down.& I+ P& z' M9 e* d
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
' h) l+ C' i5 k# a7 T' nyou7 ?2 u, y1 l- i% e/ U
leaving it down.5 V: s$ X- _0 O$ X& a5 G
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?  Q4 ~# S# i5 m! a
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.& r; {2 F& R5 T7 Y6 [
Let it be.
5 U$ [1 Y# e( Z% V1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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$ c4 `; A$ S9 l1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it0 V! t# f$ l2 e# [5 n- x
that way.
- h% |, S" i9 j4 _! X1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!! w2 i% D; b0 {" N0 Z9 W% e8 B

, @; v9 B& Z+ w4 M7 v; @1 s3 F1. Crying is blackmail.% v+ @, T! [, X' L0 S
1,哭泣是敲诈
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6 {5 l- E. ~2 S1. Ask for what you want.5 B' s7 ^% J! F
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!& S' r! u, t  f) O# P' S  k
Strong hints do not work!* g) T. K) \( e3 O( a
Obvious hints do not work!
6 i/ u. _% N* B0 W# b; `, vJust say it!( s6 r% R, i) K& u
1,你想要什么就说
( x6 K/ f! b! }3 k  v我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!- R7 b  B; {7 ?3 N

6 ?3 Q6 H4 w% n4 @0 \9 [' q" N1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every 2 c7 D& I# p7 o0 k/ c( V$ m5 z
question.: O( m5 X1 G3 j8 I7 X
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)5 ^: e7 I% k8 D2 F- ?7 n3 ]2 p5 n
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's5 j2 Q! E8 a5 F  w4 ]4 y
what we do." I. d' i* v9 {$ V& k, f1 I
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.1 J/ [% |  K  s( ]1 B. G
1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.
- b1 e4 V+ s1 a& b1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.+ S( X3 Z8 g, y, A( }; E
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
7 R. m& b0 b2 R  L) \5 z: w4 x我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us3 Z+ j, t5 V2 X. M/ X2 `
to act like soap opera guys.5 U* ~9 y+ V" m# t  N% s7 ?4 \4 k
1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们" h, I4 E; k4 x

1 K" T: M! R0 B' S+ v3 Q0 E- _1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1 T( ^: P* ?: R# Z/ K1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们
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( A( \9 f9 r) `+ z  x: x$ r% M1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways* t, w1 _5 B% R6 A" f
makes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.
& ?. [. q) u: j1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。; k/ _) n" K; ?  x2 W2 z
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)
  Z% B) l, A5 ]2 v4 q  r3 a2 \1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it/ x# \; V- {; J! M+ k: m! Z
done. Not both.
. u; a4 m+ P/ L, [3 d* b+ CIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.5 Z7 `; O# \: }( J
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
- x+ M; s! w6 d: R! jcommercials.* `" s6 e; {5 z3 z0 u: c+ [
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.4 R7 `9 a& H4 F7 b8 ~$ m# v

' D) `! a) H( S. c* F: v  S1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
% B' M' b! y6 }9 M3 [- APeach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
' y: A. H" ~2 r  [We have no idea what mauve is.4 [* O# b6 ~* S

6 O0 ?4 m$ m3 q2 n0 x) Z! g  x1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like3 `; l$ t# \) ^! c' L# {
nothing's wrong.
" N$ t! q1 q$ A# W4 FWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.5 T# B8 [# }  n5 q7 E! H* `; ?
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
. X5 M- }& }  m! [: \) @2 {% cyou don't want to hear.
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+ y$ m# X2 P: o1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is7 k2 l) ^; w& j6 A6 p/ [; j
fine...Really.4 J' D1 Y9 i- Q  G0 t/ [

0 c1 j/ f7 H) ?# Q3 f8 p: v1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to( ^7 I' j- Q( p/ o
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.( [) L, a# c1 {& |! p8 E
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1. You have enough clothes.
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) C: [7 L& u( l+ E. A8 x: k1. You have too many shoes.2 ^5 l8 z# \# y  i

* D' G) M3 q" E5 c1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
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- y- @+ n8 A4 @5 J1. Thank you for reading this.: q- L0 A. ], S, l* L, y

0 X5 B; e1 |  fYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;1 T: ~* }3 ?% Y& \0 \& Y% s( k& s
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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* a! z0 }1 m3 ^5 i# z' J% e: _$ xPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.4 K, @, l  o2 d9 w) D% R. @% @7 B
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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) |7 @# w. [7 d% d2 S( `2 |1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
+ \  `1 h; ^6 W' g8 m我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.# F- Y. h$ b. n7 K6 ]: b/ Y; G9 J
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。, V) {, `- N% \8 y) u8 S

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8 d) H. w$ r6 ^: C1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
$ f5 @* I; z: K  K3 a  L# t, Y如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。' k3 Q+ O# y' Q' X/ `1 a# S

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' j  v+ S. u0 T: _1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.. U2 d  t. U& A& h" o
如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。+ D8 [2 f  L& R: m# g
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' D+ P! P" x' p) |/ E$ z1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.- y% n! l2 ^; D: J, S1 I' C
如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:9 |, l( g8 ?0 R0 x/ Z7 ^5 R
ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
8 l0 ^8 q$ w5 E; j4 e所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。# Y0 W3 Q0 R0 ?
# t3 Q7 c4 C1 d% A: ?
这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置9 o( o# r: o8 A
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really." `# _: J7 p2 c% L" c9 i
如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.! D4 t1 M5 R& Y4 I) ~
不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。
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1. You have enough clothes.- B0 z+ n) P9 \; {" w  \2 A
你的衣服足够多了
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" L% Y# [' H6 ?0 A$ }* K3 V" Y1. You have too many shoes.
5 [, D& A: M" n2 H5 d# ?你的鞋子也太多了吧+ k* f1 h, u9 N1 B) r

' X! s) L2 W, H/ y4 J2 O1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!" q: o! l, A! k; t) {
我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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1. Thank you for reading this.
) ^+ i( h! ^2 l) \) w. G/ r( i多谢你能看完这个
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3 T& X+ r4 X% N  v- hYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
4 a2 v9 d- q) g. @% T# h9 z& u5 @我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:8 {4 T" C7 \7 _4 @
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置; v- `5 ]  k/ q( e% w2 s

" C, v4 t" O7 B4 u0 o9 T$ D2 e; e还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!

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1 |( L& z9 A4 b8 B应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿
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玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:6 P1 k$ @" o$ e( Z* y3 j8 x) `
1. You have enough clothes.8 i/ l2 m8 |- E+ a4 I9 K+ Q
你的衣服足够多了
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1. You have too many shoes.6 Q+ Y. [# }+ g
你的鞋子也太多了吧
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这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?5 O2 p# L# U8 W5 a1 i1 s. l
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----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.; ^) C* H8 L, w6 i/ y
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!3 ]6 W7 I# q5 W+ n' U$ N: s6 i% ]
Strong hints do not work!
( L* [/ d! k: P% GObvious hints do not work!
2 W: K8 m  t" V3 j" C' m* GJust say it!. l+ L3 y( p% g) [- o- `- Y
1,你想要什么就说  x" X: t* g7 R! W- n
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:
. ^9 U7 Y' P/ J. l1. Ask for what you want." V: q. _$ c+ W( }
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!" n) A6 b6 X9 P0 l5 H  `! w
Strong hints do not work!7 [$ l* d$ r" k0 l' G* @
Obvious hints do not work!6 B' \, b0 L8 i& S5 a% f8 F
Just say it!; G* C% X" V3 V( @8 J8 C! y- j
1,你想要什么就说
; m8 }  k- \8 X2 W2 B我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...

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1 D4 B" M( |/ A' @2 u1 O% Y  M瓦赛
大型搬家
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
7 ~* \) n: d# I3 |! b被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿& H& [3 S; T$ W( \
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:
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  I+ O# H2 G1 |3 ~9 Z9 x
咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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* j  C. B6 B! A; [, Zhttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1

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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。. g4 L& C! ^% W& Z  d( e
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还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:- i( w. W3 h1 R/ x+ g

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4 k# c  W% z; [6 D- D$ G& }9 k这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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还想问问你的体会呢!
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& \6 r  y! \. s! h* B% j
: [. S! E" `* l! T4 W, h8 ^' x1 ?6 J体会?
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& y! p& b: Q4 L! i$ p9 ]5 k5 c$ J回答到那个帖子下面了
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