In the garden of my heart

Dawson

听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！

3 V3 u5 \( `9 a7 r& pIn the garden of my heart
; G7 F* g/ |- [+ N( l, _+ ?+ {. l6 TYou planted a tree
From sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
6 d/ J1 l4 q  [1 T4 r% U0 C, R& H: wNourished with my soul
Devoured my sorrow by thee

/ l6 w8 k" Y" p6 iIn the memory of my life
# ^4 Q' h+ Y0 xYou planted a dream
Should the sky fall down on me
5 ?* a' A9 j% p5 a$ }May promises fade in the sea
Sewing back every broken pieces
1 @$ [8 K9 \5 f/ R- fBursting the love out of me

+ L! V, a6 p# u- k9 s: h9 d[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]

云山水月

原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
/ s% x4 E1 V  D" E( ^& L7 O6 n听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！

In the garden of my heart
You planted a tree
From sunset til dawn
" ]" W# ]& Q" T. T! {3 _1 e3 J1 JThrough darkness to light
2 [# p0 p8 @) ^; f, k  \Nourished with my soul
* G8 A' D; I0 D. NDevoured my so ...

7 }* l/ ~; H2 E4 f+ W% d眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？

写得真好。
% ^) v/ t) D* V% m' \
加精加精！

Greatwall

哥们儿，你没喝多吧？没事就过来烧烟啊！

九月

汗！居然有２单词不认识。：（

Justing

原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
* A$ K! I% K/ o  T眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？
3 m& w0 E1 G7 a' W7 t4 u写得真好。
加精加精！

7 L8 W$ L' M5 ^我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗

五月

如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

微澜

原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表
2 Z& ~" z# M/ j, N' Y9 I: Q如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

9 S2 Z$ ?' R# x$ C五月JJ这个意境，想想实在是罗曼蒂克，不过在爱屯，海天相接是没有了，只有在湖畔雪山了：）

朱顺顺

Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.

3 b1 S, W2 G( T" PSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

Dawson

原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
6 f4 E$ H- A4 C( r5 c5 fShould the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
( u7 d+ n9 ^$ i+ i# ?# M5 m. B
- Z- m, h* d1 Q+ T9 Y: W0 DSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

Thanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.

1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".

% A# V! y6 A( }4 t2 j4 Z2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.

月光宝盒

红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民，但很喜气！很有乐在其中的意境啊！

FCUK

thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
; c8 y/ V9 l' l8 Z/ V) O3 J6 w
( y* |: g! E$ ~+ v  FShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

五月

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
' }' m$ F, L5 K0 J. w- J! hthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
8 ~0 _7 a3 S* ^! L0 d
  [1 ~' l) F' _3 F( b/ AShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

$ n0 a( `5 J1 k% r诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.

Dawson

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

3 I% h2 y1 Z1 }) WShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

4 h9 ]' Q) w5 G7 M( W  K' _* Y
. `7 z1 s5 ~* O- }  a有啊，有很多经典的例子。

比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》

Don't weep at my grave
8 w" g7 b# A4 n2 h; d- `: G: aFor I am not there,
$ ]9 `/ d7 V8 P; k% j" B' b& II've a date with a butterfly
To dance on the air.
$ y. H* @/ G" q  `+ T2 S. Q  F. zIf I'm missed, find a flower,
) v& Q" c1 c" I# D; C$ S& F7 X6 sI'll be there too,
Sniffing it's fragrance
Right next to you.

Don't be sad
When you remember me,
For I'm singing in the sunshine,
! _# y' S9 X3 X3 A$ ^7 |Wild and free,
Flirting with the lighting,
# `" j1 R- T+ K. i$ dPlaying tag with the wind,
/ N" u% U! S6 k5 K: pChasing the thunder
Time and again,
/ u- g6 A5 s7 f) ^0 N2 \/ N) y1 m3 zSoaring with the eagle,
0 i9 a5 b; i4 PSwimming in the sea,
Enjoying all of nature
) N- b. B! I0 i2 s: `While I'm waiting for thee.